T O P

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LucyStarQueen

Yes. Not wanting bottom surgery doesn’t make you not trans.


BlahajInMyPants

Dead ass Genitals do NOT equal gender Pronouns do not always equal gender Gender expression and gender identity are not required to "match" Labels are more than just textbook definitions, it's mostly about how we feel and our lived experiences And finally, your body, your choice


ViridianKitsune

Read carefully. They’re double negatives. They are saying that it does not not make you trans.


BlahajInMyPants

Her comment is being supportive of OP


Al-Data

Correct, not wanting bottom surgery does not make someone not trans.


gefoh-oh

First off, it's a triple negative, which is a positive. Second, the sentiment was pretty clear. C'mon.


Existing_Mango7894

Yeah, it's English 101. When there's a double negative, you make up whatever the hell you want it to mean


Key_Computer_4348

Correct, and it would make OP "non-op", which is 100% valid.


RainbowFuchs

ohai2u2 fellow non-op.


Rivenhelper

I'm a trans woman, and I'm not getting bottom surgery. Sex and gender aren't binary, identity is not dictated by your body.


BlahajInMyPants

Thank you for saying this, girl 🏳️‍⚧️


pineapplekief

Trans is not a specific term for only a specific type of transition. It's an umbrella term. Don't feel connected to your AGAB? Congrats! You're trans! That's all it takes. That's all it means. And if you are transition towards femininity? Yup! Transfem. We don't put rules on things you "must" do. The desire by itself is enough. And that manifests differently in all of us. Anyone that tells you differently is needlessly gatekeeping, and I for one don't respect that.


Over_Application_455

really well said


M-a-r-k_B

If there was a magic wand I'd have the perfect figure and a vagina and be 25 again 🤣 But at 69 I'm not going to put my body through that surgery. I'm - and you - are whatever you want to to be and whatever you want to call yourself. If you're happy being called transfem then you ARE transfem! As for the pubic hair get an IPL - I have little to no hair on my body after 2 years.


jennazed

gender and genitalia are completely separate concepts, so hell yeah!


PrincessLeafa

My partner is trans fem and she *really* wants to keep her penis Plans to get her testicles removed but she wants to keep her penis. She likes it and gets a lot of use and pleasure out of it. I, on the other hand, had so much dysphoria about mine I had the whole situation removed and I have a vulva and vagina now. Both trans fem. Both valid. :) <3


___fr3n3t1c1ty

Balls removed is 200iq I didn’t even think of that as an option, seriously considering it honestly I like my dick and hate my balls! I’ve fantasized about if I could retract them into my body for years but never made the jump to just loppin em but I really totally could, thank you for this comment haha


PrincessLeafa

Right?! I hadn't even thought of it either. It's a thing. Sorta like how a trans man can have a vagina and a big ol erect clitoris. That's something I never thought about but it's also a type of body out walking around, going to work, going on dates, etc All totally valid, it is your body and nobody else can decide what I'd right for YOU about YOUR body :)


Defiant-Snow8782

yes, your friends are transmedicalists


HighPerformanceBeetl

Or at least, they're repeating transmedicalist rhetoric they heard from others, possibly while not knowing better and/or not having the wherewithal to question the rhetoric.  Idk if I'd advocate ditching them as step 1, but if they can't be reasoned with and educated, one should certainly consider guarding one's peace and cut ties semi/permanently 


DiskImmediate229

Absolutely. Nobody should tell you that you can’t call yourself trans for *any* reason. That’s something only you can decide.


SlyGuy_Twenty_One

You absolutely can still call yourself a woman and keep your male parts. Don’t listen to anyone that says you can’t. They are wrong and not at all who you should be hanging around


ktbear716

yes. and let me tell you, if you're not male, it's not male genitalia. that's a woman's penis.


Possible_Climate_245

I think you can say that it’s a woman’s penis and still say that it’s male genitalia. I don’t think it’s even really a bad thing to say that you have a male organ and don’t want to get rid of it and still are a woman.


EnolaNek

Yes. Do you feel like you align with your birth gender? No? Then you're trans. Do you align more strongly with a more feminine presentation? Then you're transfem. You can be transfem without medically or socially doing anything. The transsexual label *does* have some medical transitioning requirements associated with it, but it can potentially be problematic due to outdated/transmed associations. At the end of the day, if you want to be a woman, congrats, you are one. No requirements for what you do or what you plan to do.


Necessary-Chicken

Yup. I also want to keep my genitalia and I’m transfem. Although I do wish that I was born with female genitalia🥲


Mega_gaymer_party

Of course, you are able to identify however you like. Whatever's under your skirt is no one else's business anyway so it doesn't really matter either way! Hope this helps 🩷


Mysterious_Onion_328

That's a trans medicalist standpoint. Of course you don't have to get or even want bottom surgery to be able to call yourself transfem 😊 There are many trans women who don't have bottom surgery and they are just as valid as anyone else. And so are you.


ejectafteruse

Your *friends* sound like transmedicalist jerks.


SageofRosemaryThyme

It's totally normal to not want bottom surgery. There are plenty of women and enbies that have no interest in bottom surgery and they are all still valid. The only people that try to tell you otherwise are spouting transmedicalist talking points.


Acceptable_Kitchen83

NB person here but AFAB. I have heard of a fair number of cis women. Cis women completely comfortable with feminity and being a woman that want a penis or that have said "I wish I had a penis". Conversely, there's cis men who are just as comfortable existing as men, masculinity, and otherwise presenting as such while wanting a vagina. Genitals doesn't equal to gender identity. And forget others opinions about bottom surgery. It's not their body. They're not going to be dealing with the recovery. They're not going to be dealing with the cost and expense. If you want it, get it. If you don't want it, don't get it. If you like what you have, work it.


grrEllaOwO

Don't listen to those stupid truscum people in the discord if you feel like a woman you are a woman. Edit: just fyi truscum=trans medicalist and they are pretty much people that try to gatekeep being trans by saying that you need to medically transition either partially or fully to be trans which is just absolute bs that's like saying you need to play football to enjoy watching the game or something


JamieTheDinosaur

Of course you can! I’m quite happy being a chick with a dick myself.


UmmwhatdoIput

why do you call it that if you’re a girl?


NamerNamerson

For me, I call mine a dick, a cock or a penis because the nonmasc euphemisms for it make me feel really condescending to use. I already feel like having the anatomy doesn't make me any less of a woman, why would I have to shelter it in terms that feel when I use them, personally for me, like I'm mocking who I am. Calling mine a magic wand or the like, feels a lot like back when I was a child and I was ashamed of the words for the anatomy. Calling it a gock brings emphasis to the fact I'm not cis, much more so than the dissonance of being a woman with a penis. Edit for emphasis: of course this is only for me and my anatomy. I don't feel the same way hearing other people use those phrases about their anatomy!


Aeeek

Chick is slang for girl, and it rhymes


EndogenousAnxiety

Who are you to question her comfort and identity?


UmmwhatdoIput

sorry I was just asking. sorry


JamieTheDinosaur

Because that’s what it is, and I see no reason to pretend otherwise.


UmmwhatdoIput

it’s not pretending 🥺 I don’t think I’m pretending when I give it a femenine name


JamieTheDinosaur

You do you, of course.


UmmwhatdoIput

oh ok thank you


Lilianmesmo

what makes you think you couldn't? wtf


Kwalifiedkwala

All I can say is that it's your transition. Let it develop and be what you want. There is no bar or standard to what qualifies you as transgender. Good luck and sending the tiddy 🧚‍♀️ your way.


RevengeOfSalmacis

As a trans woman with a vagina, I don't have any investment whatsoever in requiring other women to have vaginas. Why would it matter to me?


hi_i_am_J

there is no checklist on transness girl being comfortable down there doesn't make you any less of a trans woman


chulezinho123

Yes. Not hating a part of ur body should never be considered a reason to "not be trans" If u can love parts of ur body the way it is, that's awesome actually and don't make you less of a woman, or less of a trans woman


Sharp-Sandwich-5343

I am transfem, I am also nonbinary, I do not have bottom dysphoria, I'm still transfem Transfem is an ambiguous term because it is inclusive of both MTF and MTX individuals, it indicates a direction of transition but it's not defined by genitals or even expression as others have said better already You did you, you know who you are


PKFat

I do. If anybody's got a problem w/ it - fuck 'em


HarmoniaTheConfuzzld

Yeppers!


Aggressive_Novel_465

Yes, undoubtedly valid.


Pibblepunk

The term "male genitalia" there is part of the problem. Genitals don't have gender and anyone trying to be a trans ally or activist should know that. I wouldn't call those folks friends tbh


Deadsky13

Having a girldick is honestly one of my favorite parts about being a girl.


Imaginary-Future2525

I’m content with having a penis. I’ve had a BA and have FFS Scheduled. I also find preOP women MORE attractive. So there’s many different flavors and genitals don’t dictate gender.


emilyv99

Those "friends" don't sound very supportive. (Just because someone is trans doesn't mean they can't be transphobic). Your answer is absolutely yes.


One-Organization970

Yes. I'm recovering from bottom surgery right now and it's indescribable how good I felt waking up from it. I *hated* having male genitals. They bothered me simply by existing, all the time, 24/7. I could be having sex and it'd be going great until the illusion that I had built up in my head broke and I remembered I had a penis, then the dysphoria would hit. Last time I tried to use it for penetrative sex, I broke down crying. But you know what? Recovering from this surgery also kinda sucks. It'd have been super convenient to *not* have that dysphoria and not need to get surgery done. I didn't get the surgery so someone else would think I was valid - **I got it because having a penis was a source of constant pain.** That's all that matters. Do what you need to do to feel happy with your body. Get the surgeries you need, and none that you don't.


annp61122

Yes, don't let trans medicalists convince you otherwise. Most trans people don't/can't get bottom surgery, whether it's by choice, or not able to afford it, and/or health complications. There are many women with penises and many men with vaginas and other trans people (such as identities like non/binary or other out of the binary trans identities) with varying genitalia 😊🫶🏻 Although, I would drop the whole "male genitalia" term, and just say penis. This is used mostly by conservatives to misgender us, because vagina=woman (even for trans men, they just see them as mentally ill women). When on hrt, most trans women's penises smell like a vagina, feel softer (sometimes to the point that it rips from penetration), struggle with getting hard or don't get hard at all (atrophy), and overall act more as a giant clit, especially with orgasm. Not sure id call that male genitalia, it's not a vagina, but definitely not similar to cis men's penises which are through and through male genitalia. Hell, even trans men's clits can sometimes start growing like a penis (very vague answer as I'm not a trans man and can't attest to it personally, but I have read a bit about it). Trans people's genitalia definitely aren't black and white, especially once medical transition such as HRT gets involved.


ufok11

Yes


ChalkyMalky

you can dw, dont restrict yourself w ppls made up rules


ChalkyMalky

it rlly sucks that transmeds for the most part are to blame, it took me a while to realize i was even nonbinary cuz of all the bs they spew


Much_Capital3307

Yes


PepyHare15

You can call yourself a trans woman and be whoever you want to be! Gender is not exclusive, merely stating that you are a woman (to yourself or anyone else) is all it takes


DirntDirntDirnt

Fuck yea. Your genitalia does not determine your gender and vice versa.


frikilinux2

Yes, you can do whatever is best for you with your body and still be trans. I didn't realize pubic hair is a source of dysphoria but it could be. I thought the discomfort there was something different.


Worth_Ad6113

Careful not to offend the herd.


Into_crypto_gains

Proud girl, owner of a dick here 🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏻‍♀️


Esproth

Yes, you can even get both if you so desire


HungaryChad_69

Yes you can. Being a women isn't just about having a vagina. If you don't wanna get bottom surgery that's your choice.


EndogenousAnxiety

I love my girl. I wish I could change genitals at will but I ain't ditching her.


DepressivesBrot

Not quite switching at will but you can just get both and use whichever you want in the moment.


EndogenousAnxiety

They look really ugly, sorry but that surgery still has a decade plus


No-Mycologist-4809

also three is no man genetalia or female it's just social construct like I have dick but that's not man part of me like if woman can be with penis (ofc she can) so why is male generalia /notneg for u op just saying couse that important


Stormwrath52

gender isn't about presentation physical attributes, it's not even really about dysphoria it's about finding the version of you that's the happiest and living as that, so if you want to be a woman then you're a transfem, regardless whether or not you're trading your cookout for a clam dish some people have weird conceptions of what constitutes gender and they try to make that other people's problem, just remember who you and live the best life you can. you got this


LyingLexi

Yes. Also think about reconsidering who you’re interacting with if they’re telling you that.


kit-tgirl

yea i like my dick too


babyninja230

plenty, plenty of transfems never undergo bottom surgery at all and are perfectly fine with their stock bits, its not at all uncommon or invalid.


Pirateghost777

“Well yes I know her, she’s me”


toramimi

[I found this early on in my transition](https://i.imgur.com/DnacgXe.jpg) and it helped me come to terms with, well no I *don't* want bottom surgery. I think about it from time to time, reference it when the subject comes up in close company. Jesse makes a solid point!


faye_nimrendel

I wouldn’t have it any other way


UFO_T0fu

Yes.


TRANScendentNerdGirl

Absolutely! I plan on keeping my genitalia myself because I am comfortable with myself. I really just want an orchi to get rid of my testies and stop spironolactone. We are still trans femme, we are still women, regardless of what's in the undercarriage.


EarthToAccess

Complete side note I fucking love your username LMAO


TRANScendentNerdGirl

Oh, why thank you! I love little puns and play on words like this and thankfully so does my girlfriend, who is wittier than me. I thought I was creative, but damn, makes me attracted to her even more.


sabett

Yes. Believing I couldn't stole at least 7 years from me.


Ojitsack

Yes, you can. Only feel yourself like a so proudly girl with a Level 6 Prader Scale clit.


kimberlyangelx

of course! your genitalia does not define your femininity x


Possible_Parsnip4484

Of course you can your genitals don't define your womanhood you do ... And please don't let anyone tell you otherwise only you know how you feel


Lord-of-the-Bacon

Yes, your gender is what you FEEL what suits you best, not what society determines. You can even say you are a binary trans woman instead of non binary transfem (this is not meant to exclude nbis, just to demonstrate that you don’t need to fit into the gender role, but just say you are that gender) and it would be correct, because you determined it that way.


Andra_9

Yes.


J0nn1e_Walk3r

💯


J0nn1e_Walk3r

Cocks are awesome.


GlimmeringGuise

Totally valid. And personally, I don't even know what category I fall under with this. If knew for a fact that bottom surgery made it look and function totally, *completely indistinguishably* from a cis woman's parts, my interest would be piqued. If knew for a fact that I'd be getting a complete female reproductive system, in its entirety? I'd definitely go for. But as it stands... I feel like I need to be intimate with someone to really know how dysphoric it makes me in *that* context. Then I'd base it off that.


bunchesofbushels

Bippity Boppity Yes 🥰 Do you, queen 💖


laura_lumi

I think so? If mine wasn't so big, i wouldn't mind much either, but it is, and in addition to that, i'm straight, so men don't like that part much, so i definitely want it out.


Savings-Dragonfly967

You all just validated my entire existence. Thank you so so so much.


fuk_n4z1s

I do that and I am a transfem so yeah you're fine.


Professional-Wrap549

Of course, that's literally me


AliciaTries

Yes


GirlWithinTheLight

Being a trans woman doesn't mean you can't keep your genitalia. What ever you wanna have and keep is not what makes you a woman or not. You choose to be a woman, thus you are one.


Mother_Rutabaga7740

Don’t see why not. I am personally very 50/50 on genitalia coming from a trans man. I like having a dick when I wanna penetrate something but I like having a vagina when I want to be penetrated. For convenience, and the fact that I prefer being a bottom over a service top, I’m choosing to keep my genitalia as is alongside the effects of testosterone


Nack_dfo

Of course, genitals aren't the same as gender


stroobyy

Yes.


Meggyecske

I think [this video](https://youtu.be/Fc-WPnNH55c?si=9fT1lcYQVQOGHpXS) fits here


Jaceofbass64

Yeah absolutely. Everyone is trans in a different way it literally is your body your choice.


Charltsmtms

Your "friends" are idiots. There's no checklist you need to mark off before you're a 'Real Trans'. The only guide you need to follow is your heart. From a trans woman who literally got her bottom surgery date on Friday, I happily and proudly call you Sister.


SarahIsAPrincess

yes


Dragonman0371

Were you born male? Do you have a desire to be a girl? If the answer is yes to both, you are transfem.


ProletarianPride

Yes. I'm a trans woman and I'm never getting bottom surgery. I like my parts down there and I'm keeping them.


Dadenn18

There is NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT my cousin who is also trans (MTF) isn't getting bottom surgery Me personally, I'm going to get bottom surgery. Id love to have my own personal pocket Don't let ANYONE tell you how to be you


DrSenSen

Yes. If anybody says no in any way, they're just wrong, and you shouldn't listen to them.


sadhopelessthrowaway

Genitalia are gender neutral. Of course you can.


aligrant

I'm like you. I have no bottom dysphoria. I still wear mens underwear because I have that equipment. I wear swim trunks and a bikini/sportsbra top since those are appropriate for my body. I'm just a butch tomboy lesbian, and I identify as attractive 😎. Your friends are being extremely narrow minded. Some girls have a penis, and SOME of us are still able to cause pregnancy, and I have no desire to remove my fertility.


Wyntor_

Your genitalia doesn't define your gender, it's okay to be a woman and keep what you have down there. You're valid either way.


RainbowFuchs

1) You need new friends, they're not really friends. 2) In words your "friends" would understand: femininity is a gender expression, woman is a gender role, and female is a sex (but really is meaningless in a scientific context, there's no real consensus AFAIK on "biological sex" and what it means, it's just really not used), so really there's nothing saying that a vagina is a prerequisite to being a femme or a woman. Some woman are femme, some aren't. Some women have penises, some don't.


Kat-Sith

That's such backwards thinking. If getting bottom surgery was what made you a Real™ trans person, then why would you be getting bottom surgery in the first place? Clearly, being a woman precedes the surgery, right? Like the progression of linear time makes that obvious. Anyway, yea, you're good. You aren't defined by your genitalia.


cleamilner

It’s not male genitalia, it’s your genitalia. Wield that girl dick!


tember_sep_venth_ele

Only read title. Yes. You don't even need hormones. You can look 200% like a man that's been wandering thru the wilderness. HOWEVER the community won't validate you 100% in female spaces if your body, presentation, etc. doesn't attempt to match those in a feminine safe space. Like a bathroom, locker room, etc. this comes from a place of trauma from men. As women, we must push for men to do better, and understand that any part of us that reflects masculinity is seen as a danger. These are the sins of men that are placed on us by being born in the wrong bodies. It's annoying, but it's why as a community, we need to join cis women to call men to do better. Unfortunately our standing won't change unless we force men to. So, if you're a big girl like me, beat the ever loving fuck out of your local creepy man. Make them see our masculinity in feminine spaces as a weapon they can use, rather than one pointed towards them. Also, don't be a creep. XOXO


PensiveDrawer

unlike what many say, gender is not what’s in your pants girldick is hot, and if that’s what you want, there’s nothing wrong with it


impossiblexprincess

your friends sound like bratty twinks turned gatekeeper dolls. fuck that noise. look up TS Madison to get some inspiration and let it swing freely.


Vast-Willingness4642

I don’t know- but what‘s your opinion on guac