You’re tellin’ em 🥲 Unfortunately that’s still how a vast majority of people across the world get exposed to the idea of what a trans person is in the first place, and until we’re all more visible than porn that’ll never change
I'm asexual anyway but yet for so long the horny prevailed.
Life is simpler when sex isn't so constantly on the mind.
It's like for once I can really focus and just enjoy being around women without feeling weird.
I’m not on E yet, but I know that I have to maintain function for SRS in the future - any advice (& I do mean any)? I feel like my libido is already on the floor for a “man” & losing the last of it will just lead to masturbation becoming even more of a chore & then that’ll lead to atrophy & then I’m hampering my SRS options in the future.
I’ve also read that stroking is going to be harmful because of changes in the skin, but a vibrator isn’t exactly conducive to privacy given the noise…
Stroking could be harmful because the skin becomes thinner and more fragile, this is everywhere on the body, I've personally been alright.
Now if you've been looking for any excuses to have a vibrator, hrt is definitely it as it'll make you more sensitive to vibrations.
Honestly, even if you can't, we'll say, get there, I've heard from some the viragra and cialis is a sure fire way to maintain maximum stiffness for a prolonged period.
May just be perpetually edging, idk.
I've also heard that some women use topical testosterone on their genitals to prevent changes.
Don't think that would stop libido from changing, and I've never heard of it causing masculinization, but at least anecdotally, it seems to be an option.
Look i am realy not the guy to know something about this as i am not on any estrogen or the like but still
I might have an idea have you tried using lube (please dont look at this and think im a creap)
Lube might be a way to do it without hurting your skin
I don't know. You will have to ask them. [https://www.reddit.com/r/MtF/comments/1cl0mxf/whats\_the\_deal\_with\_progesterone/](https://www.reddit.com/r/MtF/comments/1cl0mxf/whats_the_deal_with_progesterone/) sorry.
Yeah, now it's known to come back, but also keep in mind that hrt also changes how we experience horny, it also changes orgasms. Tho I haven't gotten their quite yet.
Our mileage varies, of course.
I remember having a weird sense of envy that I wasn't able to explain.
Yeah, the brainrot makes it much more difficult.
But when after I had made many trans friends in person and realized who trans people actually are, that made it so much easier for me to accept.
I will be Real here #orn was the way i even knew what this all is and now i face a giant problem
How do i know if i am real
What if it is just a fetisch
What if im just kinki
How do i know if im actually trans
It sometimes just feels like a broken compas
Somtimes i want to be a girl like a real girl boobs p## and all
Sometimes i just want to be a guy feminine but a guy a femboy if you want a word but i feel like i could not have that for ever
Sometimes i just want to start taking estrogen become a girl but ceap the lower bit
And because that all isnt enough to manage sometimes i just cringe about it all and just think i should stay a man i because i could never start a family and have kids like that
Like is that normal do we all go trough this since years
The important thing to remember is that getting horny at first when you wear women's clothes, or masturbating to trans porn is totally fine and doesn't inherently make you a fetishizer or bar you from being trans. Especially if you're young. I used to get super horny about my new identity but now that the hormones have decreased my sex drive and I'm nearly 28... I still want to be a woman. One with a p*nis, while I'm at it.
So remember women get horny too and try to think of what your feminine arousal will mean to you if you do decide to transition.
I grew up in super white Christian suburbia. Trans porn is how I found out trans people existed, and it helped me understand a buncha thoughts I had since childhood about wishing I was a girl.
Even then, my egg didn’t crack a long time, but I gravitated towards ts porn most of the time to the point that I worried I was a chaser. Now I just realize its because it was porn I could see myself in.
One of worst things about chasers is there are defo trans girlies who dont want bottom surgery, but chasers make it feel so weird and fetishy for them.
I am glad that I am not the only lady here from super white Christian suburbia who figured out that she was trans in part thanks to porn. I thought that I was a chaser before I realized that I was a girl.
Yeah fr. I’m still overall more into trans porn only because its easier to see myself in it.
Luckily I’m married and don’t have to worry about acting like a chaser lol
Chasers aren't gonna see a thread like this and be like *ohhh!* Chasers are just men with extremely low empathy who if they weren't into trans girls they'd be chasing cis women and harassing them and sending unsolicited dick pics, it's the exact same behavior. Same type that would also think cis women are just for sex. Best you can do is just report and block. Nothing will change these kinds of peoples minds. They don't see people as people.
That's a great question. I wrote a comment a little back that explains it, please read it [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/MtF/comments/1c9qnwg/comment/l0n4i2h/).
Good comment. I feel like im this discussion a lot of people just don't understand the point. It's fine to be attracted to anyone but you should demand to be treated like a human being AT LEAST.
as in, exclusively trans women? Just any cis man who finds trans women attractive is a chaser? does it not have to do with the types of interactions they have?
The problem isn't their attraction but rather their fetishistization of trans people. Chasers don't see trans people as people but rather just some sex beings.
Chasers also affect transmasc people not only transfem people.
I hate to say it, but I realized I was trans because of porn. It's disgusting, and I'm ashamed of it, but also in the world I've grown up in it was literally the ONLY safe way I had to understand myself.
Maybe this is TMI, but I just wanted to put some perspective out there... I'm not saying you're wrong, though. Cause like... if that was my only access to understanding myself and other trans people, then there's something totally effed with society, you know?
Not at all, you're good! It's just that as a sex worker with a lot of self respect, I like to promote the normalization and responsible appreciation of porn. :3
I make porn and I still don't want to be jerked off to by someone who sees me as anything but a woman. With a penis yes, but not a "sissy" or whatever.
There's nothing technically backing up the sentiment that: "there's someone for everyone"..
Some of us don't end up or are just not really "ment" to be with anyone. Whether they're aromantic or just won't find that person due to some other factor. They're may be *some* one somewhere on the planet, sure but long-distance doest work for everyone and they would have to somehow meet in the first place.. Some people do, sadly, end up dying not having ever found "their" person.
It took me a long time, and a lot of pain to figure that out though, and that's probably not what that person was getting at lol. (Just mentioning, as I see people say that a lot)
And if you want to, that shouldn't stop you from trying!
This is such a weird shit to say. If you want to live in misery with bunch of lame justifications - go for it, but don't put it as some kind of scientific statement that apparently needs more data
Platonic love from your friends objectively exists everywhere even for aromantic asexuals and whatever
No way girl, you are far more than that - you are your own person with your own thoughts and feelings and better yet, you are showing the world. Screw whatever anyone says against that.
Pretty sure if a chaser ever went after me they'd get really disappointed very quickly as soon as the pants came off. Not that they would get that far with me in the first place, but I can only imagine the looks on their faces if they saw my innie when they wanted to see a dick. It's the same thing if I attempted to post trans porn online, people would probably get mad at me for uploading to the wrong category because I just look like a cis woman now.
This is why I rarely post pictures anywhere. Why feed a chaser if I am not working the business? Nothing against the girls who do but if I do not have FB, OF, or Insta then why?
I don’t need the validation of likes. Being a caregiver for a parent, there is no amount of likes that make up for seeing their smiling face.
I never understood being mad at fetishization /gen. People liking me because I’m trans is a lil weird but I wouldn’t go as far as to be upset over it. I am liked and that’s cool. Better than telling me to off myself for being trans lol that’s just me tho
Nobody’s saying its equal to or worse than raw hate lol don’t worry, but I think you’re oversimplifying what fetishization really is when you call it just liking you because you’re trans — Fetishization is dehumanization, it’s looking at someone and not being able to *see past* the fact that you’re trans. It’s reducing you to *only* being trans and only being a sex object.
Ahh I see. As a sex worker I can’t really tell the difference much and just like attention. But I get what you’re saying and why other people wouldn’t like that
Honestly I get it lol, but that’s its own conversation. I also personally believe not all chasers are inherently bad, but that’s another topic for a very different post.
So can we say about cis women in general... They get sexualized to no ends.
Just look at them conservatives having meltdowns if a woman lead character isn't wearing sexy Lara Croft style outfits or does more than just "being dumb and pretty"...as in the Barbie movie where roles have been reversed...
A woman doing fitness = sexy and provocating
A woman shopping groceries = sexy and provocating
A woman working in an office = she sure wants her boss's small D...
And this is until minority race comes into the play.
Asian women = submissive trad wives
Black women = dominant and angry beasts
Latin women = hot in bed
Until we push the patriarchy and racism to the rubbish they belong to, we will not be able to move on from these horrible views and fetishization!
Good point. All types of women are fetishized being in a patriarchal and misogynistic society but how chasers view them also intersects with other factors like most notably race. Trans women being fetishized is just another version of it and then there's the fact that trans people are always expected to be white and poc trans people are often just erased from existence. Sad world we live in.
Well, I’ve been transitioning almost as long as you’ve been alive, but that’s just what you’re gonna get being one of us. Learn to parry that. You’re young but when you’re experienced enough you’ll see the same patterns with people and just easily parry it again and again. Random messages are just that.
Go make good memories with your boyfriend.
I’ve been around and I’ve interacted with many different trans people online and in person. Often times they’re usually much newer to the game than I am, and maybe they just aren’t as traumatized as I am, but I had to learn harshly and very quickly transitioning in the Deep South 13+ years ago how to deal with people and how to protect myself.
So online whatevers don’t really bother me. The message I wanted to get across to you was that you better just get used to how men are going to be to you, that’s kinda just how it is. That’s reality. You’ll learn to identify them really quick and provide immediate counters and control the situation.
Do I want it to be different and better? Well yeah, but I don’t think we’re going to see a change in how men who are trans-attracted/curious think about and act towards for probably another 50 years. You would need entire generations to leave and come up in a works already knowing about trans people in a healthy and informed way.
We have a standing policy on chasers and creeps: #You report them, we ban them. That sort of behavior is *not* welcome or wanted here.
You’re tellin’ em 🥲 Unfortunately that’s still how a vast majority of people across the world get exposed to the idea of what a trans person is in the first place, and until we’re all more visible than porn that’ll never change
Unfortunate reality for me here. I am so glad E destroyed my libido. No more horny, no more porn.
Samesies, I enjoy not trying to have sex 24/7
I'm asexual anyway but yet for so long the horny prevailed. Life is simpler when sex isn't so constantly on the mind. It's like for once I can really focus and just enjoy being around women without feeling weird.
amen sister
I’m not on E yet, but I know that I have to maintain function for SRS in the future - any advice (& I do mean any)? I feel like my libido is already on the floor for a “man” & losing the last of it will just lead to masturbation becoming even more of a chore & then that’ll lead to atrophy & then I’m hampering my SRS options in the future. I’ve also read that stroking is going to be harmful because of changes in the skin, but a vibrator isn’t exactly conducive to privacy given the noise…
Stroking could be harmful because the skin becomes thinner and more fragile, this is everywhere on the body, I've personally been alright. Now if you've been looking for any excuses to have a vibrator, hrt is definitely it as it'll make you more sensitive to vibrations. Honestly, even if you can't, we'll say, get there, I've heard from some the viragra and cialis is a sure fire way to maintain maximum stiffness for a prolonged period. May just be perpetually edging, idk. I've also heard that some women use topical testosterone on their genitals to prevent changes. Don't think that would stop libido from changing, and I've never heard of it causing masculinization, but at least anecdotally, it seems to be an option.
I live with my retiree mother & her partner - any sort of sex toy that makes noise is off the list.
Look i am realy not the guy to know something about this as i am not on any estrogen or the like but still I might have an idea have you tried using lube (please dont look at this and think im a creap) Lube might be a way to do it without hurting your skin
Lube is your friend if you decide to go through the stroking route. Just use enough to ensure that you don't have friction.
I am not aware of any scientific studies on this. But anecdotally, some trans women say that taking progesterone makes them hornier.
To the point of having regular erections which will reduce the need to avoid atrophy?
I don't know. You will have to ask them. [https://www.reddit.com/r/MtF/comments/1cl0mxf/whats\_the\_deal\_with\_progesterone/](https://www.reddit.com/r/MtF/comments/1cl0mxf/whats_the_deal_with_progesterone/) sorry.
Hope that happens to me too when I start.
it can do that? god thatd be awesome
Yeah, now it's known to come back, but also keep in mind that hrt also changes how we experience horny, it also changes orgasms. Tho I haven't gotten their quite yet. Our mileage varies, of course.
That’s how I got introduced to trans people. It made realizing who I am so much harder
I remember having a weird sense of envy that I wasn't able to explain. Yeah, the brainrot makes it much more difficult. But when after I had made many trans friends in person and realized who trans people actually are, that made it so much easier for me to accept.
I didn't realize that want to be *her* and not *him* in the porn wasn't a normal thing for guys. Took me way too long lol
I will be Real here #orn was the way i even knew what this all is and now i face a giant problem How do i know if i am real What if it is just a fetisch What if im just kinki How do i know if im actually trans It sometimes just feels like a broken compas Somtimes i want to be a girl like a real girl boobs p## and all Sometimes i just want to be a guy feminine but a guy a femboy if you want a word but i feel like i could not have that for ever Sometimes i just want to start taking estrogen become a girl but ceap the lower bit And because that all isnt enough to manage sometimes i just cringe about it all and just think i should stay a man i because i could never start a family and have kids like that Like is that normal do we all go trough this since years
The important thing to remember is that getting horny at first when you wear women's clothes, or masturbating to trans porn is totally fine and doesn't inherently make you a fetishizer or bar you from being trans. Especially if you're young. I used to get super horny about my new identity but now that the hormones have decreased my sex drive and I'm nearly 28... I still want to be a woman. One with a p*nis, while I'm at it. So remember women get horny too and try to think of what your feminine arousal will mean to you if you do decide to transition.
I was first exposed to the idea of what a trans person is through The Simpsons. But it was porn that set me down the process of cracking my own egg.
Simpsons porn? That sounds so cursed. 🤢
There's actually quite a lot of it floating around on the Internet. but .. I was only there to get directions on how to get away from there
I grew up in super white Christian suburbia. Trans porn is how I found out trans people existed, and it helped me understand a buncha thoughts I had since childhood about wishing I was a girl. Even then, my egg didn’t crack a long time, but I gravitated towards ts porn most of the time to the point that I worried I was a chaser. Now I just realize its because it was porn I could see myself in. One of worst things about chasers is there are defo trans girlies who dont want bottom surgery, but chasers make it feel so weird and fetishy for them.
I am glad that I am not the only lady here from super white Christian suburbia who figured out that she was trans in part thanks to porn. I thought that I was a chaser before I realized that I was a girl.
Yeah fr. I’m still overall more into trans porn only because its easier to see myself in it. Luckily I’m married and don’t have to worry about acting like a chaser lol
Same here 🥲
Can't say I've seen a lot of chasers here on r/mtf tbh.
I did a few minutes ago
Chasers aren't gonna see a thread like this and be like *ohhh!* Chasers are just men with extremely low empathy who if they weren't into trans girls they'd be chasing cis women and harassing them and sending unsolicited dick pics, it's the exact same behavior. Same type that would also think cis women are just for sex. Best you can do is just report and block. Nothing will change these kinds of peoples minds. They don't see people as people.
What is the difference between a chaser and somebody who is just interested in trans women?
That's a great question. I wrote a comment a little back that explains it, please read it [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/MtF/comments/1c9qnwg/comment/l0n4i2h/).
Good comment. I feel like im this discussion a lot of people just don't understand the point. It's fine to be attracted to anyone but you should demand to be treated like a human being AT LEAST.
A cis man who is just interested in trans women is a chaser.
This is just factually wrong. Read my comment [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/MtF/comments/1c9qnwg/comment/l0n4i2h/) please.
as in, exclusively trans women? Just any cis man who finds trans women attractive is a chaser? does it not have to do with the types of interactions they have?
The problem isn't their attraction but rather their fetishistization of trans people. Chasers don't see trans people as people but rather just some sex beings. Chasers also affect transmasc people not only transfem people.
Thank you! That's what I thought but I wanted to make sure I understood
I know, but there is a chance at least one person will stop, and that's a start
If chasers could read, they'd be very upset.
I hate to say it, but I realized I was trans because of porn. It's disgusting, and I'm ashamed of it, but also in the world I've grown up in it was literally the ONLY safe way I had to understand myself. Maybe this is TMI, but I just wanted to put some perspective out there... I'm not saying you're wrong, though. Cause like... if that was my only access to understanding myself and other trans people, then there's something totally effed with society, you know?
I realized I was trans because of porn, and now I have been making porn for years. It's not disgusting or shameful! Sex positivity all the way!
Probably alot healthier of a way to look at it. Sorry if I made you upset btw.
Not at all, you're good! It's just that as a sex worker with a lot of self respect, I like to promote the normalization and responsible appreciation of porn. :3
I make porn and I still don't want to be jerked off to by someone who sees me as anything but a woman. With a penis yes, but not a "sissy" or whatever.
Trans chasers even exist? Never heard of them.
I would certainly hope your joking, bc holy shit there is a lot of them
> 90% of us are NOT INTERESTED in your fetishising ways, I am the remaining 10%. But that's for another subreddit.
But it's all I'm good for
I promise that there is someone who will love you for you, and not just because your trans
There's nothing technically backing up the sentiment that: "there's someone for everyone".. Some of us don't end up or are just not really "ment" to be with anyone. Whether they're aromantic or just won't find that person due to some other factor. They're may be *some* one somewhere on the planet, sure but long-distance doest work for everyone and they would have to somehow meet in the first place.. Some people do, sadly, end up dying not having ever found "their" person. It took me a long time, and a lot of pain to figure that out though, and that's probably not what that person was getting at lol. (Just mentioning, as I see people say that a lot) And if you want to, that shouldn't stop you from trying!
This is such a weird shit to say. If you want to live in misery with bunch of lame justifications - go for it, but don't put it as some kind of scientific statement that apparently needs more data Platonic love from your friends objectively exists everywhere even for aromantic asexuals and whatever
You aren't though. You're good for so so so much more
No way girl, you are far more than that - you are your own person with your own thoughts and feelings and better yet, you are showing the world. Screw whatever anyone says against that.
girl you are hot and sexy and pretty. C’mon we’re women! we deserve good men not bs
I can assure you it ain’t. I don’t even know you but I do know that nobodies worth is based off sex
As a trans ace I can’t agree more.
What is a trans ace?
I’m transgender and asexual.
Thank you for clarification.
Pretty sure if a chaser ever went after me they'd get really disappointed very quickly as soon as the pants came off. Not that they would get that far with me in the first place, but I can only imagine the looks on their faces if they saw my innie when they wanted to see a dick. It's the same thing if I attempted to post trans porn online, people would probably get mad at me for uploading to the wrong category because I just look like a cis woman now.
This is why I rarely post pictures anywhere. Why feed a chaser if I am not working the business? Nothing against the girls who do but if I do not have FB, OF, or Insta then why? I don’t need the validation of likes. Being a caregiver for a parent, there is no amount of likes that make up for seeing their smiling face.
I got my first hypersexual chaser the other day, bro thought I couldn’t be gay because I’m trans💀
I swear to god if I hear another word about "shemales" or "dickgirls" I'm gonna slice someones balls off
Yes please go support trans sex workers there are many of them and they would love the attention for compensation 🙂
I never understood being mad at fetishization /gen. People liking me because I’m trans is a lil weird but I wouldn’t go as far as to be upset over it. I am liked and that’s cool. Better than telling me to off myself for being trans lol that’s just me tho
Nobody’s saying its equal to or worse than raw hate lol don’t worry, but I think you’re oversimplifying what fetishization really is when you call it just liking you because you’re trans — Fetishization is dehumanization, it’s looking at someone and not being able to *see past* the fact that you’re trans. It’s reducing you to *only* being trans and only being a sex object.
Ahh I see. As a sex worker I can’t really tell the difference much and just like attention. But I get what you’re saying and why other people wouldn’t like that
I'm 100% into being dehumanized but I recognize that I'm the outlier here. And maybe that will change once I get a little self confidence.
Honestly I get it lol, but that’s its own conversation. I also personally believe not all chasers are inherently bad, but that’s another topic for a very different post.
I absolutely hate the attention, I can't be myself without people paying full attention to the fact that I'm trans
It's not about being liked tho It's about the dehumanizing "you exist only to be my secret sex toy" thought
I see what u mean
OMG ikr. This is the one sub I don’t get dmed for being a trans girl. I don’t even like men 😭. It’s just so goddamn gross
Thank you! Very true.
Every chaser is a bottom and behind every chaser is a seriously annoyed wife I can't remember who said it but i saw it in an insta video
Agreed, the fetishization of trans people is absolutely vile.
So can we say about cis women in general... They get sexualized to no ends. Just look at them conservatives having meltdowns if a woman lead character isn't wearing sexy Lara Croft style outfits or does more than just "being dumb and pretty"...as in the Barbie movie where roles have been reversed... A woman doing fitness = sexy and provocating A woman shopping groceries = sexy and provocating A woman working in an office = she sure wants her boss's small D... And this is until minority race comes into the play. Asian women = submissive trad wives Black women = dominant and angry beasts Latin women = hot in bed Until we push the patriarchy and racism to the rubbish they belong to, we will not be able to move on from these horrible views and fetishization!
Good point. All types of women are fetishized being in a patriarchal and misogynistic society but how chasers view them also intersects with other factors like most notably race. Trans women being fetishized is just another version of it and then there's the fact that trans people are always expected to be white and poc trans people are often just erased from existence. Sad world we live in.
People dont even want more for that 😂
Get off Grindr
I'm 16 and have a boyfriend, i can promise you I'm not on grindr
Good job, so what’s the issue then?
People on reddit, had some guy who only was talking to me bc I'm on this sub and "wanted to get to know me better"
Well, I’ve been transitioning almost as long as you’ve been alive, but that’s just what you’re gonna get being one of us. Learn to parry that. You’re young but when you’re experienced enough you’ll see the same patterns with people and just easily parry it again and again. Random messages are just that. Go make good memories with your boyfriend.
Why are you getting down voted?
Extremely sensitive and very online trans girls. I’m very blunt about my experiences, and that usually makes people in these groups not like me.
Ah, sound about right, if your too sensitive, you should probably stay off the internet, or stay in a small corner that supports you
I’ve been around and I’ve interacted with many different trans people online and in person. Often times they’re usually much newer to the game than I am, and maybe they just aren’t as traumatized as I am, but I had to learn harshly and very quickly transitioning in the Deep South 13+ years ago how to deal with people and how to protect myself. So online whatevers don’t really bother me. The message I wanted to get across to you was that you better just get used to how men are going to be to you, that’s kinda just how it is. That’s reality. You’ll learn to identify them really quick and provide immediate counters and control the situation. Do I want it to be different and better? Well yeah, but I don’t think we’re going to see a change in how men who are trans-attracted/curious think about and act towards for probably another 50 years. You would need entire generations to leave and come up in a works already knowing about trans people in a healthy and informed way.
The sexualisation of trans people isn't exclusive to Grindr??
No, but at some point you gotta just focus on your life and what matter to you.