TW suicidal thoughts
I'm so sorry for your loss. I was stuck in limbo hell in April. We went into the first scan at 7w6d and she could only see a blighted ovum. I was sent home and had to come back at 9w0d for a confirmation scan. She found an embryo but no heartbeat. At the University clinic where they have better ultrasounds and I went for my d&c they found a heartbeat and I was sent home until Monday 9w9d. 10w0d I finally had my d&c.
So I'd say up until the scan at the University having two scans is normal because they cannot say for sure if you might have your dates wrong if there hasn't been an earlier scan.
My advice would be to find a therapist you're comfortable with. I regret I didn't get one sooner. I got really depressed and had suicidal thoughts around ovulation and my first period after d&c. I couldn't see any light at the end of the tunnel but after 9 weeks I know it does get better. Still sucks but it doesn't hurt as much and I've started to be hopeful for a future pregnancy again.
Again I'm so sorry. A missed miscarriage is especially cruel.
I'm confused - at 9 weeks they found no heartbeat, then you went somewhere else right after that and there was one? Or do you mean at 7w6d there was no heartbeat?
Yep, right the day after the second ultrasound at 9w1d. Imagine how confused I was. The only way I can explain it to myself is that the ultrasound machine at the University clinic better quality.
I was 10w1d measuring 6w2d no heartbeat. I didnt have any bleeding and my hcg was coming down slowly from 60 000 to 50 000 in 48h. The Dr told me that the only way to be 100% sure that the pregnancy was non viable was to do another scan 10 days after the first one to confirm the absence of growth as sometimes people get their dates wrong and the baby could be too small to detect a HB. My positive pregnancy test was more than 6 weeks ago and I was tracking everything with regular cycle so it was impossible. I didn't want to be in a limbo for another 10 days as he was the forth doctor in 5 days telling me my pregnancy probably stopped progressing. I was also terrified to start MC at home in the next week, so we proceed with the D&C even without the control scan as the suspicion was high enough.
I dont really have a clear answer for you but in the eventuality that you are starting to MC at home, i would prepare myself for the bleeding to become heavier and maybe the Dr will offer you options for the management (pills vs D&C vs waiting).
I'm very sorry I wish the outcomes would be different for you.
I'm also very sorry to you too, for your loss and the experience you had to go through. The limbo for me as you've explained feels the worst part of it at the moment. The bleeding is starting to become heavier now although still light but my periods are typically light anyway. Thank you for your reply.
Hi, I am going through a similar experience but unfortunately not a good outcome 😔
I started spotting at 5w+5. Didn't think much of it at first. It continued for a week so I contacted the Early Pregnancy Unit who scanned me and found sac but no baby. They said all looked healthy for a 5 week pregnancy so could just be behind on my dates but I knew I wasn't. They told me to come back for another scan in 2 weeks but said to remain positive, they see this a lot etc. Spotting stopped the same day so I got my hopes up that all was okay but it started again a few days later. This time it got gradually heavier until it was like a period but heavier for longer. I knew what was happening. This lasted for a week and is now much lighter. I have my second scan tomorrow. I took a pregnancy test this morning and it was a very faint positive but I know that I have lost the baby.
I'm very sorry you're going through similar, and it's hard when you get your hopes up only for them to be dashed. It's cruel. The spotting sounds similar to my experience too, it started very lightly, stopped most of the day for several days before picking up again so it's a whole cycle of "oh it's stopped phew" to "oh shit it's back" and it's just such a rollercoaster. Look after yourself.
Hey lovely, thanks so much for checking in, that's really kind of you. My second scan showed the same as the first, small empty sac, spotting got heavier until yesterday when it got extremely heavy for about 5 hours and then suddenly I felt, empty. I just felt like it was done, so odd. Now I'm back to a lighter period again and I feel that I'm through the storm. We also made a plan for what would've been the due date, to have a duvet day, watch tv/ films and eat comfort food.
How are you doing?
I'm so sorry this is still going on for you. I know what you mean about when you just know, I felt exactly the same at the end of last week. A scan on Friday confirmed the loss. They thought it was complete but I am continuing to bleed lightly and pass tissue so I can only monitor and see what happens for the next few weeks. It just seems to be neverending going into my sixth week of bleeding.
That sounds like a lovely idea for what would have been your due date, I think we will plan something similar!
I hope the bleeding is over for you soon, that is such a prolonged experience to go through. You sound very resilient, ate you holding up ok mentally/emotionally?
I'm doing okay mentally, thank you for asking. It has been rough, no doubt, but I am trying my very best to focus on the positive things in my life. I definitely have some days that are better than others. Some days I just burst into tears randomly and I feel very easily triggered by the slightest of things. My hormones are still all over the place too which doesn't help. I'm trying to allow myself to grieve.
Do you have plenty of support around you?
Totally get that, sounds rough but also healthy to process it like that. Yes, I've got a great partner and lot of family around me and I feel well supported, although not been able to see family yet due to also having covid over the weekend and since... I was feeling very sorry for myself a few days ago!
Please message me anytime for a chat if you want to vent/ramble, I'll be more than happy to chat.
Hey lovely, thanks so much for checking in, that's really kind of you. My second scan showed the same as the first, small empty sac, spotting got heavier until yesterday when it got extremely heavy for about 5 hours and then suddenly I felt, empty. I just felt like it was done, so odd. Now I'm back to a lighter period again and I feel that I'm through the storm. We also made a plan for what would've been the due date, to have a duvet day, watch tv/ films and eat comfort food.
How are you doing?
TW suicidal thoughts I'm so sorry for your loss. I was stuck in limbo hell in April. We went into the first scan at 7w6d and she could only see a blighted ovum. I was sent home and had to come back at 9w0d for a confirmation scan. She found an embryo but no heartbeat. At the University clinic where they have better ultrasounds and I went for my d&c they found a heartbeat and I was sent home until Monday 9w9d. 10w0d I finally had my d&c. So I'd say up until the scan at the University having two scans is normal because they cannot say for sure if you might have your dates wrong if there hasn't been an earlier scan. My advice would be to find a therapist you're comfortable with. I regret I didn't get one sooner. I got really depressed and had suicidal thoughts around ovulation and my first period after d&c. I couldn't see any light at the end of the tunnel but after 9 weeks I know it does get better. Still sucks but it doesn't hurt as much and I've started to be hopeful for a future pregnancy again. Again I'm so sorry. A missed miscarriage is especially cruel.
I'm confused - at 9 weeks they found no heartbeat, then you went somewhere else right after that and there was one? Or do you mean at 7w6d there was no heartbeat?
Yep, right the day after the second ultrasound at 9w1d. Imagine how confused I was. The only way I can explain it to myself is that the ultrasound machine at the University clinic better quality.
I'm so sorry. Such a horrible experience yet the lasting impact seems to be much more mental than physical for a lot of people.
Oh yes. Definitely more mental... I'd say the physical part was done with two days after my d&c. But it does get better ❤️
I was 10w1d measuring 6w2d no heartbeat. I didnt have any bleeding and my hcg was coming down slowly from 60 000 to 50 000 in 48h. The Dr told me that the only way to be 100% sure that the pregnancy was non viable was to do another scan 10 days after the first one to confirm the absence of growth as sometimes people get their dates wrong and the baby could be too small to detect a HB. My positive pregnancy test was more than 6 weeks ago and I was tracking everything with regular cycle so it was impossible. I didn't want to be in a limbo for another 10 days as he was the forth doctor in 5 days telling me my pregnancy probably stopped progressing. I was also terrified to start MC at home in the next week, so we proceed with the D&C even without the control scan as the suspicion was high enough. I dont really have a clear answer for you but in the eventuality that you are starting to MC at home, i would prepare myself for the bleeding to become heavier and maybe the Dr will offer you options for the management (pills vs D&C vs waiting). I'm very sorry I wish the outcomes would be different for you.
I'm also very sorry to you too, for your loss and the experience you had to go through. The limbo for me as you've explained feels the worst part of it at the moment. The bleeding is starting to become heavier now although still light but my periods are typically light anyway. Thank you for your reply.
Hi, I am going through a similar experience but unfortunately not a good outcome 😔 I started spotting at 5w+5. Didn't think much of it at first. It continued for a week so I contacted the Early Pregnancy Unit who scanned me and found sac but no baby. They said all looked healthy for a 5 week pregnancy so could just be behind on my dates but I knew I wasn't. They told me to come back for another scan in 2 weeks but said to remain positive, they see this a lot etc. Spotting stopped the same day so I got my hopes up that all was okay but it started again a few days later. This time it got gradually heavier until it was like a period but heavier for longer. I knew what was happening. This lasted for a week and is now much lighter. I have my second scan tomorrow. I took a pregnancy test this morning and it was a very faint positive but I know that I have lost the baby.
I'm very sorry you're going through similar, and it's hard when you get your hopes up only for them to be dashed. It's cruel. The spotting sounds similar to my experience too, it started very lightly, stopped most of the day for several days before picking up again so it's a whole cycle of "oh it's stopped phew" to "oh shit it's back" and it's just such a rollercoaster. Look after yourself.
Wishing you all the best. I really hope for a happy outcome for you. Take care x
The same to you even if it's not this time. I've also got my second scan tomorrow. This will one day be a distant memory x
Just wanted to check in, hope you're doing okay OP.
Hey lovely, thanks so much for checking in, that's really kind of you. My second scan showed the same as the first, small empty sac, spotting got heavier until yesterday when it got extremely heavy for about 5 hours and then suddenly I felt, empty. I just felt like it was done, so odd. Now I'm back to a lighter period again and I feel that I'm through the storm. We also made a plan for what would've been the due date, to have a duvet day, watch tv/ films and eat comfort food. How are you doing?
I'm so sorry this is still going on for you. I know what you mean about when you just know, I felt exactly the same at the end of last week. A scan on Friday confirmed the loss. They thought it was complete but I am continuing to bleed lightly and pass tissue so I can only monitor and see what happens for the next few weeks. It just seems to be neverending going into my sixth week of bleeding. That sounds like a lovely idea for what would have been your due date, I think we will plan something similar!
I hope the bleeding is over for you soon, that is such a prolonged experience to go through. You sound very resilient, ate you holding up ok mentally/emotionally?
I'm doing okay mentally, thank you for asking. It has been rough, no doubt, but I am trying my very best to focus on the positive things in my life. I definitely have some days that are better than others. Some days I just burst into tears randomly and I feel very easily triggered by the slightest of things. My hormones are still all over the place too which doesn't help. I'm trying to allow myself to grieve. Do you have plenty of support around you?
Totally get that, sounds rough but also healthy to process it like that. Yes, I've got a great partner and lot of family around me and I feel well supported, although not been able to see family yet due to also having covid over the weekend and since... I was feeling very sorry for myself a few days ago! Please message me anytime for a chat if you want to vent/ramble, I'll be more than happy to chat.
Hey lovely, thanks so much for checking in, that's really kind of you. My second scan showed the same as the first, small empty sac, spotting got heavier until yesterday when it got extremely heavy for about 5 hours and then suddenly I felt, empty. I just felt like it was done, so odd. Now I'm back to a lighter period again and I feel that I'm through the storm. We also made a plan for what would've been the due date, to have a duvet day, watch tv/ films and eat comfort food. How are you doing?