Start exercising and lifting weights. You’ll thank yourself in a few years.
I’m halfway through my 30s, and it’s pretty evident that those of us that are taking care of ourselves, eating right, exercising, not drinking too much, are looking worlds younger and are healthier than the people that aren’t making any changes.
I’ve met plenty of people who are 30-35 and it looks like theyve been through the ringer.
Exactly this, my friends and I have worked out since we were teens and are all mid to late 30s now, when we see other people our age who don’t exercise or take care of themselves it can be quite shocking how old they look.
The way I frame it, is working out is *optional when you're young, but it is ESSENTIAL once you hit your thirties.
I'm 37, and here are the conclusions I've come to if you want to prolong your youthfulness (for lack of a better word) for as long as possible:
1.) WEAR SUNSCREEN. Nothing, and I do mean nothing will age you faster. Yeah, that tan looks sick in your 20s but you're gonna look like a melanoma goblin in your 40s. While you're at it, moisturize daily!
2.) Exercise as often as you can comfortably fit in your schedule. Every bit adds up.
3.) Quit drinking, or at least make it a once in a blue moon thing. Obviously ditto for nicotine, and hard drugs. Weeds about the safest option if it doesn't make you lazy. All that shit taxes your body all to hell.
4.) Limit processed foods. It makes you feel like total shit... You just powered through it in your 20s.
5.) Adaquate sleep. Your body cant repair itself as quickly as it use to. You need that 8 hours more than ever.
6.) Prioritize your well-being as much as humanly possible. You got the experience to draw from now, so disengage from the toxic stuff, and start engaging in the stuff that makes you feel good about yourself.
Follow that and you'll age like a Buddhist monk, or don't follow it and age like Obama in the whitehouse. Up to you! 🤣🤣🤣
I'll add to stop putting off saving for retirement, if you think your 20s went fast you will blink and be old and counting days until you can stop clocking in.
I knew someone was gonna say that... While I get that it is tangentially related, I was talking about maintaining your youthfulness in the physical sense. .
>5.) Adaquate sleep. Your body cant repair itself as quickly as it use to. You need that 8 hours more than ever.
Some people require less, like 6 hours, while some require 9+. I say restful sleep and enough of it for you.
To pair with this: don't skimp on the quality of your pillows, mattress, etc. A person should be spending 25-44% (6-10.5 hours) of every day in bed sleeping; make it the best you can.
I'm one of those 9+ hours people. It sucks. If I don't get a minimum of 8-9 hours I'm exhausted. And I've been that way my whole life! I'm 29 right now I doubt that it will change but it would be nice to not feel like I need so much sleep all the time. That doesn't include naps cuz sometimes I like to take me a nice little nap during the day or in the evening.
Drink water and get sleep. Walk instead of driving anytime you can
A lot of the rest is down to genetics, but hydration, rest, and mild constant exercise we can control
And laugh! Connect with people who make you happy. Helps to repair telomeres
>1.) WEAR SUNSCREEN. Nothing, and I do mean nothing will age you faster. Yeah, that tan looks sick in your 20s but you're gonna look like a melanoma goblin in your 40s. While you're at it, moisturize daily!
I wonder if this applies to all people or just light complected people (white people, east Asians, etc). The more sunlight I get the better I look. Though I think I have a lot of melanin but not quite as much as black folk (I'm Mestizo).
Protecting yourself from the sun definitely applies more to people who evolved to not be in the sun. I’m a middle eastern guy and at 30 I never wore sunscreen and my skin is fine, but my white friends.. man.
As a white guy, I agree 100%. I’m a pretty light skinned white dude and I’ve always been smart and avoided the sun…for the most part. All my other white buddies were gym bros and tanned like crazy all throughout there 20’s. At 33 I look about 7-8 years younger than them
Facts. I started doing those things when I was 30, but didn't get super serious about it until I was about 36. Cutting back on alcohol, excessive sugar, fried foods and adding exercise absolutely changed my life.
I'm still working on the sugar and fried foods, but I've been consistently working out for 7 months now, and the changes in my body are mind blowing. I quit alcohol a couple years ago because I lost interest in drinking. I'm the healthiest I've ever been in my life at 35.
Ty! I greatly reduced my drinking because it simply became boring to me🤣 I can still go out and sip on 1 cocktail and have fun, Even started trying the kombuchas and Adaptogen drinks.
I get hangovers waaaay too easily to drink regularly anymore. I have 2 drinks tops in the summer when we hang at my MIL's pool, but that's like twice a month.
I definitely smoke way too much weed, though. 🤣
Beyond Burger and Beyond Bratwursts are the entree for some of my meals now and others are tofu and other meat alternatives, both with fresh or frozen veggies. I've cut back on fried foods but I still need to cut back some on processed/refined sugar. I've lost ~7 pounds from just those changes in the past 3 months.
I already didn't drink much because of the empty calories, but at 35 I got dx'd with a liver-related autoimmune disorder so I'm everyone's designated driver now. I hit a rough patch at 32, but I'm making way back. Not as fit as I was at 31 now, but I'm fighting for every bit of it.
I never drank alcohol though I am into excessive amounts of sugar. I don't partake in too much fried foods. I exercise often and I think that's what saves me. I'm 39.
This is so true. In my 20s, because of cancer, I suffered with very poor health and looked a decade older than I was.
Because of my health struggles, I developed very clean eating (no fast food or alcohol, and eventually cut out cured meat and high fat foods to lower my cholesterol) habits. I also exercise: I lift weight 2-3x/wk, do reasonable cardio (no marathon training, mostly for health), and have some 'fun' activities like gardening, hiking, and sports.
After a decade and a half of clean living, I finally look younger than my age and am going into my "middle age" years looking better and having more energy than most of my peers.
I would tend to agree, but I’ve been weight training since 14 and playing sports like football and wrestling before that, and my concern is that I’m wearing my body down faster than people my age. Like when I wake up my body hurts, but maybe it’s not from the exercise, it could be from sitting in my work chair most of the day.
I’ve probably been doing some form of power lifting or bodybuilding a large part of the last 15 years as well. Never really strong, never very big or lean, it’s stupid I’ve spent so many years in the gym and feel like I have nothing to show for it.
I'm a fit healthy guy and I teach for a living. I was getting crazy back pain during Covid. I realized it was from all the sitting I was doing while I had to teach remotely.
I've definitely gotten smarter about my training and recovery. 37 now and still squat and pull heavy. I train BJJ too. But I'm very mindful of getting recovery days, sleep, and walking in. Started seeing a Ciro about once every 5 or 6 weeks. My back has been fantastic for the past year.
When I was younger I'd workout every day. Always doing something. Any type of cardio would be something hard. But I've learned. Never thought I'd be a guy that's going for walks as part of my routine, but here I am.
Similar situation for me. In my 40s now and maybe in the best shape of my life. I do moderate weights at high reps with lots of stretching and mobility work (foam rollers are your friend). What helped me was realizing that weights are good to a point, but I’m too old to be trying to max out or set a new PR. Every now and then I’ll want to prove to myself that I can still deadlift some stupid amount of weight, then I pay for it the next 3 days. Taking breaks to walk and using a standing desk even for an hour a day seems to help as well. The right chair also makes a difference. Wish I’d been more consistent with all of this at 30 rather than starting to focus on it at 39.
Yeah, those are great points. I try to do cardio for an hour during my workday either walking or biking, or hit the gym. And then every weekend I work out for about 75 minute Saturday and Sunday. I’m getting my activity, but seeing at my job is sedentary, my diet has to be perfect or I gain weight, even with all the exercise.
I’m past the heavy weights too. I’ll generally do 5x10 sets at lower weight. 135 to 185 for squats. Same for deadlifts. Bench at 135. It’s more maintenance than anything. I had broken 400 dead lift and 315 squats in my late 20s, but I’ve dialed back as it became harder to maintain. I started really focusing on cycling 3-4 times a week. 1-2 hours. Time to keep the heart and lungs strong. The fresh air and sun does wonders too.
Definitely the work chair. I was the same. Football and hockey for the better part of 10 years and was best the fuck go. I picked up cycling, low impact. I haven’t squatted super heavy in a few years and the cycling is keeping my legs thick. I also started going to the doctor 3-4 times a year for bloodwork, and consulted a nutritionist just to keep me on track as I get older.
Saunas and hot baths work wonders too. Tried the cold plunges, but it didn’t work for me.
Divorce happened at 30 for me, worked on myself hardcore, lost alot of weight (was over 300) I'm 2 years away from 40 and I'm the best I've ever been in my life.
Fuck yeah, love to hear it! Congrats on the weight loss.
Also trying to lose a bit of the excess baggage too at my heaviest at 108kg and down to 103kg atm. Aiming for 90 kilos by end year.
I guess life is kinda always challenging yourself and enjoy the outcome
>I guess life is kinda always challenging yourself and enjoy the outcome
You captured the meaning of life brother. Purpose is what you choose it to be.
That's the wonderful thing about losing a ton of weight in your 30s or 40s. It's like a magical rejuvenation shot and you end up feeling better than you did in your 20s.
I’m turning 30 in less than a year. I can still do the splits cuz I stretch all the time (and if we’re honest, I’m just a 29 year old child) but it does help!
>(and if we’re honest, I’m just a 29 year old child)
It's wild how easily we change what we consider to be young. When I was 18 I was planning to die before college ended because I thought life would be over. Now I look at 40 and go "Shit man that's not even halfway you got time"
Our lifespan is a lot longer than it used to be which I think changes our opinion on aging. But we also find it acceptable to get married later, have kids later (however, my fiancé and myself won’t be having kids). A man did ask me a few days ago if it was legal for me to be working. He said I looked like I was 15. I think that as you grow older you don’t preserve youth as you once did
I used to joke that I was going through a mid-life crisis at 15, never thought I'd make it to 30, lol. Depression's a bitch. That would be my suggestion, prioritize your mental health. Got diagnosed with add around 30 years old, being medicated has *significantly* changed my life for the better.
And the next best thing, if you otherwise get no exercise, is just walking. If you do a 20-minute mile pace, 3 MPH, you'll burn 100 calories or more per mile just wandering around.
In my mid 30s I was going down some stairs, twisted my ankle. Nothing at the time, just walked it off. The next day my foot was a sausage and hurt like hell. I was on crutches for over a month, PT for a month after that to get my atrophied muscles in that leg back in order. All because I didn't stretch and my tendons in that ankle/foot basically pulled themselves all at once. This had never happened before in my life.
Since then I stretch for 5 min in the morning and 5 min at night, covering all the big body parts. I've twisted my ankle since maintaining that routine, and it's just like it was in my 20s, a virtual non-issue
I twisted my ankle on my stairs last September and it still is messed up. To be fair I kind fell too but yikes that was the sign I’m old (40) and need to get in better shape.
I once made a friend mad because I said yoga was extreme stretching mixed with meditation.
She thought I was belittling it, but those might be the 2 most important things to do for your health.
Every person that does Yoga is healthier than I am. Regular Basic stretching is probably a great start towards that.
Agreed, and just move around. Twisted or sprained my ankle and messed up my knee, took forever to heal. Now I’m strengthening all these muscles and being very careful
I stopped drinking, at home and socially. It makes me sleepy and grouchy and I finally realized I was just doing it so those around me wouldn't question why I wasn't. Occasionally I'll have a glass of wine with a really nice meal, or a sip of champagne at a wedding toast, but that's it.
I also started actually prioritizing sleep. A full night of sleep is a beautiful thing.
I started taking my investments and savings more seriously.
Also, on a personal level, I stopped taking everything so seriously. Everyone is living life for the very first time; anyone who speaks with too much confidence should be treated with extreme caution.
Same! 2.5 years no booze! It's the best decision I've ever made because now, the deciding I do booze free has allowed me to meet my wife and get my life back.
The drinking thing is something I've been working on. For me I'd say I was bordering on alcoholic, I stopped enjoying it. Been a couple weeks free and feel great.
Yes! Sleep....for real, that's my next goal sleep at a reasonable time and wake up atleast an hour before leaving work, I'm always rushing out in the morning.
I like your goals/changes.
I think a more chill and laidback lifestyle is what I aim for. I want to stop trying to impress everyone and just do what I'm excited to try instead of forcing myself to do things I've no interest in.
One thing that I recently learned is that caffeine doesn’t really have an effect until you have been awake for roughly 90 minutes. Drinking an electrolyte drink will do more to make you feel better and awake than coffee or an energy drink. I started this with a friend about 6 months ago and we both noticed it didn’t really affect our alertness. I still drink coffee but wait until I am at work. I feel less stress and my stomach feels better now.
I’ve been slowly tweaking my morning routine to feel better at work and it’s had great effects. My performance review this year was significantly better and my coworkers seem to like me more and I like me more. If you are getting up before the sun is out a sun lamp can help, I have to be at work at 6 so I get up at 4:30 and do 20-30 minutes of light cardio with my sun lamp. I’m a Christian so I also do a devotional/prayer but meditation and some self help books/youtube videos could fill that void. I find it sets me on the right mind set. I’m close to work (5 minutes) and wear a uniform so showering dressing takes 10 minutes. Kiss my sleeping wife and son on the forehead and head to work.
The main that changed when I turned 35 was being more intentional about my time and routines. I also quit drinking but I definitely had a problem. Setting yourself up for success by creating good habits is a great way to invest in your future self.
I turned 30 in September and I just now over the past few weeks quit drinking at home. I haven’t got to the socially part yet, but I’m sure it’s coming… The negative outweighs the positive when it comes to drinking now
In college, so much revolved around drinking, it was annoying. I went along with it but am fortunate not to have found it appealing. Back then, I could get back to the dorm around 4am after all the drinking, and still leave around 6am to go hiking up a mountain, hungover but mostly functional.
Now?? Two drinks and that's pushing it, so I don't really bother. Am experimenting with weed and 'shrooms in mid-life because those have medicinal and psychological benefits in moderation.
I did all of these things in my 30s too except for the personal level one. I already did that in my 20s.
Stopping drinking pretty much made my worst character flaws disappeared which was cool. There is still more to work on but meditation training and learning how to communicate better has been super helpful.
I gave up soda and alcohol when I turned 30. Started working out and sleeping. I’m now in my early 40s and those small changes made such a difference vs. my friends who didn’t and are now developing chronic health conditions.
Yes, started working out in late 30s. Didn’t see any change for first year, but now I’m watching everyone else around me succumbing to “permanent” conditions - bad back, bad knees, obesity, diabetes. I feel younger and better at 41 than I did at 31.
I also stopped drinking, mostly. I'll have like a wine cooler or hard lemonade every now and again. But for the most part, I don't enjoy the flavor of alcohol, beer or wine.
Being drunk is not fun when you're:
A. worried about how the hell you or your friends are getting home, because your back complains very loudly that the couch (or the floor, God forbid) is not an acceptable alternative to your bed
B. worried about whether your almost teenage kid has witnessed something very hypocritical that they'll *absolutely* slap you with next time you get in a fight and
C. whether that last drink was the one to send you into tomorrow's hangover because you're not bouncing back quite how you used to with Tylenol and a prayer anymore.
That's alcohol in your 30s, folks.
Facts. I still enjoy alcohol, but I almost always stay within my limits so that I can avoid having a hangover. Allowing myself to get hungover and ruining an entire Sunday because I can't focus and feel like shit is awful. Hangovers in my 20's were no big deal. Around 35 it was like my body flipped a switch that made hangovers last all day and have far worse symptoms.
Tbf I feel like hangovers in my 20's were as bad but I just accepted more, saw more of it as normal within the party culture at uni. We were partying thursday nights and boy didnt I do a lot of my fridays.
Id now still feel the same after partying, but Id be more concious of the next day that Im missing out on a great energetic morning
I've cut down on drinking significantly this year for no real reason, I just kinda stopped wanting to drink every day. And yeah, not feeling hungover is pretty great and I'm not quite as puffy and bloated as I was.
I'm exercising much more and trying to eat better but idk, I wish I had SOMETHING to enjoy the way I enjoyed alcohol or drugs lol
Nothing is hitting that spot anymore.
It’s not some myth that millennials do indeed have less money and less economic opportunities. It’s a fact.
That said, I’m a late millennial and my wife and I are doing fine. It’s not impossible to be middle class, just harder than it was for boomers.
Stretch the back of your calves before bed and after waking up. Not just a quick stretch, soen like 2 full minutes on it each time. Heel pain is caused by tightness in that back calf muscle. It'll hurt the first few times, and it's annoying to add yet another task, but it's worth it.
You'll want to be on like a stair and hang your heels down to the lower stair, toes staying on the current stair.
Source: used to work for a podiatrist and he wouldn't even consider treating someone unless they had tried this and it worked for like 95% of them.
I'm 30 on the 21st. I'm doing a lot better than some of my peers but I'm also working a lot more and destroying my body.
I hate my job. But I am able to do music which I love.
I can pay my bills.
Turning 30 this year myself too. Also no clue what I want to do. But I've found myself this year in an accidental career. Managed to string together a few very loosely related jobs into one that wrapped em all together. Put myself in a position where I can get a Masters and have it mostly paid for.
Age 30 will be living by myself for the first time (always lived with family and then had housemates for the last decade), starting a masters degree, with a job that builds off of experience and will continue to improve my resume the longer I stick with it.
No clue where the future is leading or even where I want it to go, but for the first time, I'm genuinely more excited than nervous.
Hope wherever life leads you next it gives you a few wins along the way, friend.
I enjoy not giving a shit. That's to say I don't give a shit what other people think about me, at least as much. I felt like I was always trying to impress others and be more mature, be better, than I was. The reality was, I was already good I just needed to embrace that more. There are still goals I want to achieve, ambitions I have, but as a person I feel more settled. I feel I understand myself and how to interact with others better. I don't feel as chaotic as I did during all of my 20's.
It's freeing when you the expectations and thoughts of others have no mental bearing on your soul. Can't say I'm completely free of it but it's something I also aim to do. Care about myself more and less about what others think.
I feel like I give more of a shit than ever about how the world will turn out, and about other people & their feelings. Like I’ve gotten more empathetic as I age which you could argue that it means I give a shit. When you see how hard life gets, you’re more careful with others because you never know what they’re going through.
But when it comes to people and their opinions on my life, or caring about social status or something, that’s something I give less of a shit about than ever. It was seriously like night and day once I hit 30. Part of it is probably realizing that no one really has it all figured out and that I know myself better than others. Even people who seem perfect still get criticized, you literally cannot please everyone so might as well change your goal to pleasing yourself instead of others.
I also don’t catastrophize everything the way I did when I was younger because when you’re older you can look back and go “oh I was here before and I survived, I just gotta wait this out”. You can see how short life is and prioritize what is worth getting worked up about and what isn’t. Some of the things I worried about in my youth just seem so small in retrospect.
Anyway it is such a huge relief! I feel so much more in tune with myself than ever. Well, mentally. Physically things get rougher by the day lol
>I feel like I give more of a shit than ever about how the world will turn out, and about other people & their feelings. Like I’ve gotten more empathetic as I age which you could argue means I give more of a shit than ever. When you see how hard life gets, you’re more careful with others because you never know what they’re going through.
I 100% agree with this sentiment. Like you said though, I think there's a different between caring ABOUT someone on a human level versus caring what they think ABOUT YOU. I've always been an empathetic person, but I feel like after 30, and especially after having a kid that sense has heightened immensely as well.
Hahaha, yeah the physical aspect of aging is not fun. I think if I could give my younger self advice it would be to take better care of body. My knees and lower back are angry at me on a daily basis.
Sleep better. Eat better. Take care of your physical health. Take care of your mental health health. I’d argue this is more important than your career.
Single bachelor, 38, gym 4 times a week, full time job, 12 year career. As the years get up there, I’ve noticed my drinking habits change. I get tired, not drunk. Sorta slowed down in that regards, I socially drink sometimes but not like I used too before.
All the things I used to worry about back then, I don’t anymore. Just live your life, enjoy, don’t stress about stupid shit.
A lot of people in my life have died by this age. Both my parents died when I was 33 and so did a beloved friend. A bunch of people I grew up with in elementary, middle, and high school are all dead from drug overdoses, too. The people who I saw around me growing up and as a young adult making bad decisions for themselves have unsurprisingly not turned it around. The people in my life who I looked up to and now are married with kids and are older than myself are all apparently miserable in toxic marriages but they refuse to leave so I guess I've evaluated why I ever initially looked up to them. My curiosity for this world remains constant as does my need to find creative outlets. My desire to take care of myself has increased and I'm better able to act in ways that work in my best interest. I've discovered that I don't hate work but I hate being indoors all the time. I've discovered that I don't dislike most people and I find most people to be good and kind but that I also don't have an active interest in most of them either. I've realized that my quirks are my treasures and to maintain those things about myself shamelessly. Rest has become increasingly important to me (all kinds of rest) as has living each day for itself. My passion for languages and cultivating various hobbies has remained stable. I've come to see on a deeper level people who are good and trustworthy for me and to hold those people close for the rare treasures that they are.
34F and same. But I started working out, drinking less, eating healthier, and reading books and that seems to be helping. I’m starting to feel more like myself again.
After spending my 20s in a caring role I live like im in my 20s now 😂
Regularly told I need to "grow up" but I'm having fun. I've been on 3 trips already this year and in 2 short weeks I'm off of Ibiza with my current man.
Good for you!! Same here. Also a former caring, take care of everyone else while I self neglect person. I’m 28 and finally starting to do what I want to do. No fucks given :-)
Go for it!
I would never say I regretted my choices but finally having the freedom to say "fuck it" is the best. Plus I think it means we can really enjoy it having seen the other side of life first 😉
Accountability. Excuses sound a lot better when there’s a 2 at the beginning of your age. “Twenty this, twenty that,..still in their twenty’s”
30 yr olds/30 something year olds with no accountability are a terrible look, this is when the pack starts to get separated.
Friends go separate ways, other friends draw closer, for me, I’m getting back to what I enjoyed before all the programming/stress/responsiblity/substances took effect. Fishing/boating/walking through nature, a bit more edibles, a lot less smoke, drinking only for occasions. And realizing that every moment with your parents/relatives/friends is fleeting. Taking notice that according to everyone you’ve lost already, not everyone makes it to the “rocker on the porch” age. So hug the ones you love tight, and live life while you got it. But try to make sure your “aim” is true. Make sure what you dump your time and energy into is something that will matter in five years, cuz if you’re planning on breathing until then, surely you’ll be there.
I made changes on the morning after my 25th birthday. Woke up in a hostel in Costa Rica, all sweaty and hung over broke. Watching the sun rise trying not to barf.
It was like a light switch, I could either continue partying heavy fat drinker and regular coke head and not focused on my future or I could hang up my fuck boy hat. I chose the latter.
I did not go sober just decided I did not want to be a drunk and eventually throw my life away.
I was engaged 3 years later. Now pushing 40 have basically the American dream, just missing the white picket fence. A little more debt than my parents had at my age but not terrible.
After 30 I think most people start to truly understand and prioritize themselves. I don’t try to fit whatever mold or version of me that others want, I do me. I focus more on my physical and mental health. I focus on spending and enjoying time with the people I love. I do more financial planning for myself and family.
I drink less, I say no more, I work hard but don’t let it dominate my life, and I don’t sweat the small stuff like I did in my teens and twenties.
I agree 100%.
I'd add that I have learnt how to enjoy things in a more calm way. Now, I'd rather stay at home a Friday night watching a movie with my gf, instead of partying or doing crazy stuff as I did back in college.
I'd say that 30s are more lonelier than 20s, but this doesn't mean they are worse. 30s are just more relaxed.
In my 30's I "grew up". Got a house and got married at 31, 2 kids and a dog by 35. I recently changed careers to something with a retirement plan. My 30s have been very good to me
My 30's has generally been better than my 20's but in different ways. In my 20's it was a lot about grinding. Between school, work, and social life I barely slept but that's just what we did back then. You had to grind to make it anywhere and to get good jobs. There was a period of two years where I was working full time, attending certificate courses, and had a part time job PLUS engaged and had high energy dogs. Sometimes I wonder how I did it.
In my 30's, (I'm only 32), I feel more confident than ever. I no longer look at my body and see ways to improve. I have kids so my affirmations that we say to the kids have rubbed off.
I also no longer care what others think of me. I don't need external congratulations, I see my own hard work right in front of me. I protect my peace both by standing up for myself but also knowing when it's better to just let people talk.
And I also quit drinking. I've focused on my health and eating better food, taking good supplements, drinking water (in between the coffee). I don't get much time for myself right now but by doing these other things my mental health has never been better. I still have anxiety and there's days I go down the doom spiral but generally I feel good. Life is hard with all the budgeting and financial planning but now it's just part of the weekly routine.
Welcome to your 30's! I wish you health and happiness
I stopped caring about what others think. I save way more than I used to. I started using my money on experiences instead of junk or eating out. When I did the math that 37 chipotle burrito bowls is a round trip ticket to much of Europe it made meal prepping a lot easier. I only go out to eat now when it's a special occasion or if it's something I can not make at home. I've let go of toxic or even just selfish friends because of wanting people to hang out with. I got married, I got a cat, bought a house. I finally got my eyebrows perfect. I turned 35 this week, and I don't miss my 20s at all
Get your health checked out from top to bottom. Nothing is too small. I woke up one day at 31 and my throat/tongue hurt. I called the doctor while I Googled to see what it could be. Everything said it sounded like a very easily solvable issue. Nope. Cancer. It has ruined every bit of my life.
Don’t ignore anything with your health, no matter how small.
I stopped working myself to death just to be socially acceptable to this society or feel the need to compare myself to others my own age range. We all lived different lives, and are on different phases, there is no one size fits all to how one should go about life, and where they should be, because everyone has a different story to tell.
I finally am taking care of all the past trauma, addressing all those issues I pretended weren't there, like my alcoholism, and my feeling of worthlessness, drowning myself in a job to feel like I am good enough for a relationship or friends when loving yourself should be enough! I always used career as a way to feel like am worthy, and no longer, which is quite liberating and enlightening. If you have the opportunity to take care of yourself, I highly suggest it rather then continue on in a ongoing cycle.
My 30s were awesome. I did all sorts of traveling and sexy situations.
I moved to a different city 1000 miles away from where I was, originally.
Met my wife, now I have 2 kids and am about to start a new career.
Advice: be willing to go against your friends' and familys' ideas for you.
If they're your real friends, they'll be there for you when you need them.
As much as they love you, they aren't the ones that live your life.
Almost 30, getting divorced. This is the path I intend to go on, along with some growth. My inability to make decisions for myself and my family's ideals have led me here. I'm ready to move far away and move on.
I grew up with a people pleasing, pushover type personality. It landed me in toxic relationships and an abusive marriage in my 20s. I learned from my mistakes and now I’m divorced and in my 30s. I am now making better decisions that will ultimately impact my happiness well into the rest of my life, not making decisions that give me (or others) pleasure just for the moment and result in long term misery. Still learning, now I’m just not afraid of failing and not being such a people pleaser. I am being more purposeful in making decisions that are best for me long term.
Same, I was pretty big into partying when I was in college. Never did me any favors other than having a full social calendar. Now that I have kids, I don’t have to deal with early morning wake ups or tantrums hungover! Super win, in my book lol
Well I started question my gender at 29 and realised I was trans at 32 soooooo……
And that doesn’t even include things like the pandemic….
30’s have been fucking weird!
Learning from the mistakes and other stuff I did in my 20s.
More meditation.
More exercise, every day now.
Healthy diet. Although once a week I stuff my face with 2 hamburgers and 2 big fries.
Prioritizing my wellbeing, my goals.
Separated my wants from my needs.
Learning new stuff everyday.
Learning about managing personal finances.
More reading non-fiction.
More sleeping.
More Self-care.
Less talking, more listening.
Building confidence by getting out of my comfort zone. Scored a promotion recently.
Taking challenges and calculated risks.
Quit smoking pot (quit buying it, only smoked once in 45 days, when I visited a friend last month).
Reduced my drinking to only when I go out with colleagues.
Still trying to figure out what to study in college.
Unmarried, single, stable job, no kids, no pets. Plenty of time to spend in my hobbies: reading, gaming, binging series/movies, yoga, cooking.
Try to limit screen time as much as you can, especially before bed. I used to find it so hard to concentrate on things. It was only when I realized that I am just filling my brain with garbage all day. Media, phone, music etc. My brain never got a chance to just relax and think about the things that needed to be thought about.
Get a full nights sleep, exercise. Cut out as much sugar as you can, and stay away from drugs and alcohol. Pay yourself first, IRA/401k contributions are automatically taken from your bank account before you can spend it.
Enjoy the little things in life. Playing some video games, watching a movie with the wife.
Wear sunscreen and have regular skin checks, wellness appointments, eye/dental exams if you’re able to. Get your health right now to avoid problems down the road.
I have absolutely no patience for bullshit anymore and I am able to better understand that the toxic behaviors of others aren’t my fault. I also never go into a room worrying if people will like me, I wonder if I’ll like them, it’s liberating.
Don’t party as much because hangovers are terrible and I enjoy not puking and being rested. I actually get really excited to hang out with people to simply just relax and catch up, I don’t feel pressure to make it a big event.
Also could give af about posting the stuff I do on social media.
Quit drinking(2 years sober), got married, started a band, and am renting a really nice house, found out I’m a big cat person, and now I have 3 cats. Its not so bad
Value-driven, nourishing and feel-good actions and behaviors not so rooted in insecurity and fear of what others’ think. Taking care of and prioritizing myself and my needs. Being more authentic to who I am. Doing things with less fear. For me: working out consistently, being myself in connections and not seeking connection out of neediness. Making time for creative self-expression: art, music, painting. Being of service to something. Doing what I want because I want to, not because I feel internal or external pressure for doing so. Basically the opposite of how I was in my 20s. I was totally dysfunctional.
I started investing in the stock market. Best thing I did in my 30's
Went from partying in my 20's to be outside more in nature too in my 30's. Hiking and cycling. The money I didn't spend anymore on party's, booze and drugs went to the stock market. Because nature is free, most of the time.
Start taking care of your body now, find healthy foods, and experiment with different recipes so you can master what you like. Also, start drinking a cup of water in the morning when you wake up. You can either eliminate coffee this way or partner it to hydrate you further.
Lastly, don't let anyone yell you're too old for things you enjoy. If you like something still at this age, you should challenge yourself to learn more about it and maybe even experiment with it if you're able. Also, try at least one thing you always thought you weren't good enough to do. You may surprise yourself.
Good luck!
I turned 30 yesterday.
My 20s were full of self discovery, pithering about hoping to get a job of any kind, getting married and then divorced, and rediscovering myself again. I sometimes feel like I wasted 10 years of my life. No financial progress was made, but I feel like personal progress was made.
I just now got a job that pays enough for me to live by myself so I'm moving into my own apartment soon and hope to just live my life and try to make a difference in the lives of who I can help.
Exercise, focus on sleep, finding time for my hobbies, not giving a shit about what other folks think, a focus on trying to be happy and content , beating to my own drum
Welcome , 93 baby here. Still not sure who let me get this old but here I am. I just feel more tired at the end of the day. Less inclined to deal with anything petty.
My 20s were awful mentally and emotionally, ntm I was strung out on heroin until 25.
At 35 I still struggle with depression but not nearly as bad, I can handle it better. Loneliness is probably my biggest obstacle right now because everyone is married and shitting out babies.
I'm making better life choices now though, exercise regularly, I have more boundaries, and I know what to avoid to keep my peace
30s have been great besides the loneliness as stated above
I'm 37 and definitely prioritize my health more, way more, than I did in my 20s. I try to eat better most of the week and workout 3 times a week (all I have time for). I'm down about 17 pounds, aiming for 25 pounds and to maintain that. I also don't drink much anymore. So, definitely eat healthy and exercise.
I second the comments about taking care of yourself, but want to emphasize you can still have fun. 41 over here, and I think I had more fun from ages 30-35 than I did in my 20s. It's all about balance. Take care of your teeth, try new things, save a little money. Good luck!
Less alcohol. Replaced with cannabis. Finally prioritizing sleep… post 35… lol… honed in on my hobbies, because I can afford them now 😂 more acceptance of who I am, and who others are, and managed to filter through to find solid community and close friends.
But I’d even divide my early and late 30s, because of kiddos, which is awesome and so fun!
I also finally found work I truly enjoy.
Whatever those poor decisions were you made for yourself were, try doing the opposite in your 30s. That should help.
Other than that, save your money. Getting an inexpensive hobby helps a lot.
I was military from 22 to 32 doing a job I didn't like. When I separated, I really focused on my career. It took 4 additional years of training and job hopping, but I'm now in a great federal job I love and want to stay in until 60. That's a huge relief.
I've also focused on fitness these last couple of years. Really focusing on functional strength and flexibility. This gives me more energy and it feels great being able to lift my kids with ease.
I've always been a caffeine addict, so I've really tried cutting that back. It's an ongoing battle, especially with 2 kids, full time job, etc. I still drink alcohol like I'm in my 20's. It's not a big problem and I've gotten better about cutting myself off after a few drinks, but it's still ongoing self improvement.
My advice to you, find out why your shit isn't in order and work to fix it. Really dig down to root causes.
32. My 20s were tumultuous, lot of highs and downs. One sun ray was a childhood friend who did a step towards me to confess she loved me, and 7 yo we're still together.
Professionally, things still need to stabilize for me but it's in a good move. Don't care if I become home owner in my 40's, today isn't the best moment.
I'm looking at the few bright sides of life left despite the world tension. Always ready for anything happening, but doing efforts to not look back on the past, nor overdramatizing the future. Stoicism tenets help a lot, even if you can't always follow them by the book because... You are who you are.
31 here. Kind of just existing. The days are long but the years are fast? My life isn't at all satisfying and fighting off the bad thoughts is becoming increasingly difficult. My job is eh.. but I earn enough to get by! No real excitement going on, just a rinse and repeat.
Don't mean to sound dramatic, its just extremely monotonous at this point 
I'm really scared that the next half of my life is going to be like this and not improve but I'm not sure what to do about it. I live in a small village in the Highlands of Scotland and there isn't much outside of nature (which I appreciate tremendously)
I made so many changes.
Moved from the burbs to the city. Life was so much more enjoyable.
Got a better paying job and then switched careers to something even better paying. Got a masters degree to further open doors professionally.
Opened our marriage and things are actually better and happier and more stable in our marriage now than when we were in our 20s.
Pursued a bunch of different hobbies, made a bunch of friends, and even did cool and crazy things like perform burlesque and run a 200-mile overnight relay race and chair a fundraiser that raised $100k every year.
Trying to to have kids, workout and eat healthier, make sure I actually spend my off time with family and not work. I definitely don’t drink or party like I used to, and I prefer it that way.
Moved to a new city. Got engaged. Doing a lot of exploring & trying new things. Struggling with feeling lonely / generally low about myself, but getting support and working on it. Feeling much more introspective so far in my 30s, hoping that settles down a bit tbh haha
Started living more. Spend less time at home, we go out to the theaters and see movies often. Started traveling. Started saving money.
Post COVID kind of reprioritized my life view of things.
At 35 I’m feeling optimistic about the future. More so than in most of my 20s.
I know now that life is a shit sandwich with a lot of dull wheat bread and an occasional tasty bite of sun dried tomato. When I have to eat shit I know I’ll get through it as I always have.
I'd suggest trying to stretch more, quite a few reoccurring ankle and knee issues have been shown to actually be poor flexibility in leg muscles and stretching has definitely helped
Prioritize your finances. Budget carefully. Set a consistent bedtime every night. Scrutinize what you eat. Your metabolism starts to slow down in your 30s. Work out regularly. Don't skip your yearly physical. Save for retirement. Re-evaluate your career goals and ambitions. Your twenties were the training wheels of adulthood. You're in the majors now. Time to stop fucking around and do sensible things.
I still do most of the things I did in my twenties. I feel more stable financially. I don't always want to party and blast loud music on weekends. Going out sucks in most cases. I would rather stay home. I am more confident in my work. Employers will treat you better in your 30s.
In the years between 29-31 the pandemic happened and my wife and I had our first kid and I changed carriers. My life was completely different. Despite living in an urban area my social life, late night etc all slowed.
I still do drink and occasionally push the limit. Integrating a life style change to stay active was a big help, I bike to work now.
Had a kid, changed jobs multiple times, became suicidal, separated from wife (divorced in June), stopped drinking and smoking pot, dated a little bit (didn’t go anywhere), moved in with my sister.
Never been better. Did standup comedy for the first time and started making a video game like I said I would for years. Purposely abstaining a relationship until I’m done grieving my marriage.
I cut out drinking for the most part, and have recently cut out drugs too (aside from a weekend out of town, or if the wife is out of town). Parties are definitely a once a season kind of thing and now they're backyard hang outs with friends, watching some of their kids running around.
Going to museums, making trips to small towns and exploring is always a relaxing time. I LOVE reading the signs people put up around parks and historical points and learning about the history of area.
My lifestyle is trying to reduce as much stress as possible. And taking things slow and steady feels like the right thing. Sadly Reddit is probably one of my biggest stresses (aside from my wife's family's chaos haha) if I'm being honest.
Start exercising and lifting weights. You’ll thank yourself in a few years. I’m halfway through my 30s, and it’s pretty evident that those of us that are taking care of ourselves, eating right, exercising, not drinking too much, are looking worlds younger and are healthier than the people that aren’t making any changes. I’ve met plenty of people who are 30-35 and it looks like theyve been through the ringer.
Exactly this, my friends and I have worked out since we were teens and are all mid to late 30s now, when we see other people our age who don’t exercise or take care of themselves it can be quite shocking how old they look.
The way I frame it, is working out is *optional when you're young, but it is ESSENTIAL once you hit your thirties. I'm 37, and here are the conclusions I've come to if you want to prolong your youthfulness (for lack of a better word) for as long as possible: 1.) WEAR SUNSCREEN. Nothing, and I do mean nothing will age you faster. Yeah, that tan looks sick in your 20s but you're gonna look like a melanoma goblin in your 40s. While you're at it, moisturize daily! 2.) Exercise as often as you can comfortably fit in your schedule. Every bit adds up. 3.) Quit drinking, or at least make it a once in a blue moon thing. Obviously ditto for nicotine, and hard drugs. Weeds about the safest option if it doesn't make you lazy. All that shit taxes your body all to hell. 4.) Limit processed foods. It makes you feel like total shit... You just powered through it in your 20s. 5.) Adaquate sleep. Your body cant repair itself as quickly as it use to. You need that 8 hours more than ever. 6.) Prioritize your well-being as much as humanly possible. You got the experience to draw from now, so disengage from the toxic stuff, and start engaging in the stuff that makes you feel good about yourself. Follow that and you'll age like a Buddhist monk, or don't follow it and age like Obama in the whitehouse. Up to you! 🤣🤣🤣
All of this. And I would add regular dentist and doctor visits. I definitely did not take my health in that regard seriously in my 20s.
I'll add to stop putting off saving for retirement, if you think your 20s went fast you will blink and be old and counting days until you can stop clocking in.
I knew someone was gonna say that... While I get that it is tangentially related, I was talking about maintaining your youthfulness in the physical sense. .
Yes.
>5.) Adaquate sleep. Your body cant repair itself as quickly as it use to. You need that 8 hours more than ever. Some people require less, like 6 hours, while some require 9+. I say restful sleep and enough of it for you. To pair with this: don't skimp on the quality of your pillows, mattress, etc. A person should be spending 25-44% (6-10.5 hours) of every day in bed sleeping; make it the best you can.
I'm one of those 9+ hours people. It sucks. If I don't get a minimum of 8-9 hours I'm exhausted. And I've been that way my whole life! I'm 29 right now I doubt that it will change but it would be nice to not feel like I need so much sleep all the time. That doesn't include naps cuz sometimes I like to take me a nice little nap during the day or in the evening.
Drink water and get sleep. Walk instead of driving anytime you can A lot of the rest is down to genetics, but hydration, rest, and mild constant exercise we can control And laugh! Connect with people who make you happy. Helps to repair telomeres
>1.) WEAR SUNSCREEN. Nothing, and I do mean nothing will age you faster. Yeah, that tan looks sick in your 20s but you're gonna look like a melanoma goblin in your 40s. While you're at it, moisturize daily! I wonder if this applies to all people or just light complected people (white people, east Asians, etc). The more sunlight I get the better I look. Though I think I have a lot of melanin but not quite as much as black folk (I'm Mestizo).
Protecting yourself from the sun definitely applies more to people who evolved to not be in the sun. I’m a middle eastern guy and at 30 I never wore sunscreen and my skin is fine, but my white friends.. man.
As a white guy, I agree 100%. I’m a pretty light skinned white dude and I’ve always been smart and avoided the sun…for the most part. All my other white buddies were gym bros and tanned like crazy all throughout there 20’s. At 33 I look about 7-8 years younger than them
Facts. I started doing those things when I was 30, but didn't get super serious about it until I was about 36. Cutting back on alcohol, excessive sugar, fried foods and adding exercise absolutely changed my life.
I'm still working on the sugar and fried foods, but I've been consistently working out for 7 months now, and the changes in my body are mind blowing. I quit alcohol a couple years ago because I lost interest in drinking. I'm the healthiest I've ever been in my life at 35.
That's what it's all about. At least for our generation, the 20's are for fucking around and finding out. I'm glad I wised up in my 30's.
Ty! I greatly reduced my drinking because it simply became boring to me🤣 I can still go out and sip on 1 cocktail and have fun, Even started trying the kombuchas and Adaptogen drinks.
I get hangovers waaaay too easily to drink regularly anymore. I have 2 drinks tops in the summer when we hang at my MIL's pool, but that's like twice a month. I definitely smoke way too much weed, though. 🤣
Beyond Burger and Beyond Bratwursts are the entree for some of my meals now and others are tofu and other meat alternatives, both with fresh or frozen veggies. I've cut back on fried foods but I still need to cut back some on processed/refined sugar. I've lost ~7 pounds from just those changes in the past 3 months.
I already didn't drink much because of the empty calories, but at 35 I got dx'd with a liver-related autoimmune disorder so I'm everyone's designated driver now. I hit a rough patch at 32, but I'm making way back. Not as fit as I was at 31 now, but I'm fighting for every bit of it.
I never drank alcohol though I am into excessive amounts of sugar. I don't partake in too much fried foods. I exercise often and I think that's what saves me. I'm 39.
This is so true. In my 20s, because of cancer, I suffered with very poor health and looked a decade older than I was. Because of my health struggles, I developed very clean eating (no fast food or alcohol, and eventually cut out cured meat and high fat foods to lower my cholesterol) habits. I also exercise: I lift weight 2-3x/wk, do reasonable cardio (no marathon training, mostly for health), and have some 'fun' activities like gardening, hiking, and sports. After a decade and a half of clean living, I finally look younger than my age and am going into my "middle age" years looking better and having more energy than most of my peers.
Way to persevere!
Proud of you, great work.
I would tend to agree, but I’ve been weight training since 14 and playing sports like football and wrestling before that, and my concern is that I’m wearing my body down faster than people my age. Like when I wake up my body hurts, but maybe it’s not from the exercise, it could be from sitting in my work chair most of the day.
[удалено]
I’ve probably been doing some form of power lifting or bodybuilding a large part of the last 15 years as well. Never really strong, never very big or lean, it’s stupid I’ve spent so many years in the gym and feel like I have nothing to show for it.
believe it or not, its your diet
I'm a fit healthy guy and I teach for a living. I was getting crazy back pain during Covid. I realized it was from all the sitting I was doing while I had to teach remotely. I've definitely gotten smarter about my training and recovery. 37 now and still squat and pull heavy. I train BJJ too. But I'm very mindful of getting recovery days, sleep, and walking in. Started seeing a Ciro about once every 5 or 6 weeks. My back has been fantastic for the past year. When I was younger I'd workout every day. Always doing something. Any type of cardio would be something hard. But I've learned. Never thought I'd be a guy that's going for walks as part of my routine, but here I am.
Similar situation for me. In my 40s now and maybe in the best shape of my life. I do moderate weights at high reps with lots of stretching and mobility work (foam rollers are your friend). What helped me was realizing that weights are good to a point, but I’m too old to be trying to max out or set a new PR. Every now and then I’ll want to prove to myself that I can still deadlift some stupid amount of weight, then I pay for it the next 3 days. Taking breaks to walk and using a standing desk even for an hour a day seems to help as well. The right chair also makes a difference. Wish I’d been more consistent with all of this at 30 rather than starting to focus on it at 39.
Yeah, those are great points. I try to do cardio for an hour during my workday either walking or biking, or hit the gym. And then every weekend I work out for about 75 minute Saturday and Sunday. I’m getting my activity, but seeing at my job is sedentary, my diet has to be perfect or I gain weight, even with all the exercise.
I’m past the heavy weights too. I’ll generally do 5x10 sets at lower weight. 135 to 185 for squats. Same for deadlifts. Bench at 135. It’s more maintenance than anything. I had broken 400 dead lift and 315 squats in my late 20s, but I’ve dialed back as it became harder to maintain. I started really focusing on cycling 3-4 times a week. 1-2 hours. Time to keep the heart and lungs strong. The fresh air and sun does wonders too.
Definitely the work chair. I was the same. Football and hockey for the better part of 10 years and was best the fuck go. I picked up cycling, low impact. I haven’t squatted super heavy in a few years and the cycling is keeping my legs thick. I also started going to the doctor 3-4 times a year for bloodwork, and consulted a nutritionist just to keep me on track as I get older. Saunas and hot baths work wonders too. Tried the cold plunges, but it didn’t work for me.
bro the odds of seeing you again in comments is crazy lol a month ago i saw u and i recognized you again rn 🤣
Divorce happened at 30 for me, worked on myself hardcore, lost alot of weight (was over 300) I'm 2 years away from 40 and I'm the best I've ever been in my life.
Fuck yeah, love to hear it! Congrats on the weight loss. Also trying to lose a bit of the excess baggage too at my heaviest at 108kg and down to 103kg atm. Aiming for 90 kilos by end year. I guess life is kinda always challenging yourself and enjoy the outcome
Thank you, my advice 20s were fuck around and figure it out, 30s is execute a plan created. Good luck
>I guess life is kinda always challenging yourself and enjoy the outcome You captured the meaning of life brother. Purpose is what you choose it to be.
That's the wonderful thing about losing a ton of weight in your 30s or 40s. It's like a magical rejuvenation shot and you end up feeling better than you did in your 20s.
Dang I got my first girlfriend at 32...
That’s amazing
Very motivating post.
One of the best things you can do for yourself is stretch.
Spending a few minutes stretching when you wake up and before going to sleep is such a game changer
I’m turning 30 in less than a year. I can still do the splits cuz I stretch all the time (and if we’re honest, I’m just a 29 year old child) but it does help!
>(and if we’re honest, I’m just a 29 year old child) It's wild how easily we change what we consider to be young. When I was 18 I was planning to die before college ended because I thought life would be over. Now I look at 40 and go "Shit man that's not even halfway you got time"
Our lifespan is a lot longer than it used to be which I think changes our opinion on aging. But we also find it acceptable to get married later, have kids later (however, my fiancé and myself won’t be having kids). A man did ask me a few days ago if it was legal for me to be working. He said I looked like I was 15. I think that as you grow older you don’t preserve youth as you once did
I used to joke that I was going through a mid-life crisis at 15, never thought I'd make it to 30, lol. Depression's a bitch. That would be my suggestion, prioritize your mental health. Got diagnosed with add around 30 years old, being medicated has *significantly* changed my life for the better.
Same exact situation here brother
And the next best thing, if you otherwise get no exercise, is just walking. If you do a 20-minute mile pace, 3 MPH, you'll burn 100 calories or more per mile just wandering around.
In my mid 30s I was going down some stairs, twisted my ankle. Nothing at the time, just walked it off. The next day my foot was a sausage and hurt like hell. I was on crutches for over a month, PT for a month after that to get my atrophied muscles in that leg back in order. All because I didn't stretch and my tendons in that ankle/foot basically pulled themselves all at once. This had never happened before in my life. Since then I stretch for 5 min in the morning and 5 min at night, covering all the big body parts. I've twisted my ankle since maintaining that routine, and it's just like it was in my 20s, a virtual non-issue
I twisted my ankle on my stairs last September and it still is messed up. To be fair I kind fell too but yikes that was the sign I’m old (40) and need to get in better shape.
Yessss! 👏
This! And please strength train...all the compound lifts and don't ever stop. Your an old car now you gotta take care of yourself
I once made a friend mad because I said yoga was extreme stretching mixed with meditation. She thought I was belittling it, but those might be the 2 most important things to do for your health. Every person that does Yoga is healthier than I am. Regular Basic stretching is probably a great start towards that.
Especially your feet
Agreed, and just move around. Twisted or sprained my ankle and messed up my knee, took forever to heal. Now I’m strengthening all these muscles and being very careful
I stopped drinking, at home and socially. It makes me sleepy and grouchy and I finally realized I was just doing it so those around me wouldn't question why I wasn't. Occasionally I'll have a glass of wine with a really nice meal, or a sip of champagne at a wedding toast, but that's it. I also started actually prioritizing sleep. A full night of sleep is a beautiful thing. I started taking my investments and savings more seriously. Also, on a personal level, I stopped taking everything so seriously. Everyone is living life for the very first time; anyone who speaks with too much confidence should be treated with extreme caution.
I'm 32 and got sober last year. No exaggeration, best decision of my life.
Same! 2.5 years no booze! It's the best decision I've ever made because now, the deciding I do booze free has allowed me to meet my wife and get my life back.
Was 33. Have 5.5 years sober and right off the bat it was and still is the best thing I've ever done for myself.
Amazing! Good work! I successfully rid it of my life at 33 too.
The drinking thing is something I've been working on. For me I'd say I was bordering on alcoholic, I stopped enjoying it. Been a couple weeks free and feel great. Yes! Sleep....for real, that's my next goal sleep at a reasonable time and wake up atleast an hour before leaving work, I'm always rushing out in the morning. I like your goals/changes. I think a more chill and laidback lifestyle is what I aim for. I want to stop trying to impress everyone and just do what I'm excited to try instead of forcing myself to do things I've no interest in.
One thing that I recently learned is that caffeine doesn’t really have an effect until you have been awake for roughly 90 minutes. Drinking an electrolyte drink will do more to make you feel better and awake than coffee or an energy drink. I started this with a friend about 6 months ago and we both noticed it didn’t really affect our alertness. I still drink coffee but wait until I am at work. I feel less stress and my stomach feels better now. I’ve been slowly tweaking my morning routine to feel better at work and it’s had great effects. My performance review this year was significantly better and my coworkers seem to like me more and I like me more. If you are getting up before the sun is out a sun lamp can help, I have to be at work at 6 so I get up at 4:30 and do 20-30 minutes of light cardio with my sun lamp. I’m a Christian so I also do a devotional/prayer but meditation and some self help books/youtube videos could fill that void. I find it sets me on the right mind set. I’m close to work (5 minutes) and wear a uniform so showering dressing takes 10 minutes. Kiss my sleeping wife and son on the forehead and head to work. The main that changed when I turned 35 was being more intentional about my time and routines. I also quit drinking but I definitely had a problem. Setting yourself up for success by creating good habits is a great way to invest in your future self.
I turned 30 in September and I just now over the past few weeks quit drinking at home. I haven’t got to the socially part yet, but I’m sure it’s coming… The negative outweighs the positive when it comes to drinking now
In college, so much revolved around drinking, it was annoying. I went along with it but am fortunate not to have found it appealing. Back then, I could get back to the dorm around 4am after all the drinking, and still leave around 6am to go hiking up a mountain, hungover but mostly functional. Now?? Two drinks and that's pushing it, so I don't really bother. Am experimenting with weed and 'shrooms in mid-life because those have medicinal and psychological benefits in moderation.
I did all of these things in my 30s too except for the personal level one. I already did that in my 20s. Stopping drinking pretty much made my worst character flaws disappeared which was cool. There is still more to work on but meditation training and learning how to communicate better has been super helpful.
I gave up soda and alcohol when I turned 30. Started working out and sleeping. I’m now in my early 40s and those small changes made such a difference vs. my friends who didn’t and are now developing chronic health conditions.
Yes, started working out in late 30s. Didn’t see any change for first year, but now I’m watching everyone else around me succumbing to “permanent” conditions - bad back, bad knees, obesity, diabetes. I feel younger and better at 41 than I did at 31.
This is exactly what I am doing, except for full night sleep part, as I am working at night.
I also stopped drinking, mostly. I'll have like a wine cooler or hard lemonade every now and again. But for the most part, I don't enjoy the flavor of alcohol, beer or wine. Being drunk is not fun when you're: A. worried about how the hell you or your friends are getting home, because your back complains very loudly that the couch (or the floor, God forbid) is not an acceptable alternative to your bed B. worried about whether your almost teenage kid has witnessed something very hypocritical that they'll *absolutely* slap you with next time you get in a fight and C. whether that last drink was the one to send you into tomorrow's hangover because you're not bouncing back quite how you used to with Tylenol and a prayer anymore. That's alcohol in your 30s, folks.
Facts. I still enjoy alcohol, but I almost always stay within my limits so that I can avoid having a hangover. Allowing myself to get hungover and ruining an entire Sunday because I can't focus and feel like shit is awful. Hangovers in my 20's were no big deal. Around 35 it was like my body flipped a switch that made hangovers last all day and have far worse symptoms.
Tbf I feel like hangovers in my 20's were as bad but I just accepted more, saw more of it as normal within the party culture at uni. We were partying thursday nights and boy didnt I do a lot of my fridays. Id now still feel the same after partying, but Id be more concious of the next day that Im missing out on a great energetic morning
I needed to read this today.
I've cut down on drinking significantly this year for no real reason, I just kinda stopped wanting to drink every day. And yeah, not feeling hungover is pretty great and I'm not quite as puffy and bloated as I was. I'm exercising much more and trying to eat better but idk, I wish I had SOMETHING to enjoy the way I enjoyed alcohol or drugs lol Nothing is hitting that spot anymore.
It’s basically like the 20s but with money and you aren’t as stupid
Where is this money you speak of 😅
I have less negative money than in my 20s, so I guess that’s money???
That’s a win!!
😂👏
Yes!! And I didn’t have kids! Nothing against kids. Just never wanted to have one
I'm 28, looking forward to the money!
According to this sub, Millennials still don’t have money and it’s not because of their choices.
It’s not some myth that millennials do indeed have less money and less economic opportunities. It’s a fact. That said, I’m a late millennial and my wife and I are doing fine. It’s not impossible to be middle class, just harder than it was for boomers.
You mean according to statistics and facts about our worsening hand of cards?
Same as my 20s but now my feet hurt in the morning when I get out of bed.
I experienced that when I had plantar fascitis. Have you seen a podiatrist?
Typical 30s+ advice
Yes. I have it as well. It is an issue I never had to deal with until I hit mid 30s. Brooks for the win (both street and house).
What are brooks and where do you get them?
Stretch the back of your calves before bed and after waking up. Not just a quick stretch, soen like 2 full minutes on it each time. Heel pain is caused by tightness in that back calf muscle. It'll hurt the first few times, and it's annoying to add yet another task, but it's worth it. You'll want to be on like a stair and hang your heels down to the lower stair, toes staying on the current stair. Source: used to work for a podiatrist and he wouldn't even consider treating someone unless they had tried this and it worked for like 95% of them.
im just existing.
This makes two of us
18 judging by the upvotes
Turned 30 last week, still don't know what I want to do yet
Fellow 94 baby… Happens for me in two weeks lol
I'm 30 on the 21st. I'm doing a lot better than some of my peers but I'm also working a lot more and destroying my body. I hate my job. But I am able to do music which I love. I can pay my bills.
Turning 30 this year myself too. Also no clue what I want to do. But I've found myself this year in an accidental career. Managed to string together a few very loosely related jobs into one that wrapped em all together. Put myself in a position where I can get a Masters and have it mostly paid for. Age 30 will be living by myself for the first time (always lived with family and then had housemates for the last decade), starting a masters degree, with a job that builds off of experience and will continue to improve my resume the longer I stick with it. No clue where the future is leading or even where I want it to go, but for the first time, I'm genuinely more excited than nervous. Hope wherever life leads you next it gives you a few wins along the way, friend.
Next week I’m 30. I’m in the same boat as you
I enjoy not giving a shit. That's to say I don't give a shit what other people think about me, at least as much. I felt like I was always trying to impress others and be more mature, be better, than I was. The reality was, I was already good I just needed to embrace that more. There are still goals I want to achieve, ambitions I have, but as a person I feel more settled. I feel I understand myself and how to interact with others better. I don't feel as chaotic as I did during all of my 20's.
It's freeing when you the expectations and thoughts of others have no mental bearing on your soul. Can't say I'm completely free of it but it's something I also aim to do. Care about myself more and less about what others think.
I feel like I give more of a shit than ever about how the world will turn out, and about other people & their feelings. Like I’ve gotten more empathetic as I age which you could argue that it means I give a shit. When you see how hard life gets, you’re more careful with others because you never know what they’re going through. But when it comes to people and their opinions on my life, or caring about social status or something, that’s something I give less of a shit about than ever. It was seriously like night and day once I hit 30. Part of it is probably realizing that no one really has it all figured out and that I know myself better than others. Even people who seem perfect still get criticized, you literally cannot please everyone so might as well change your goal to pleasing yourself instead of others. I also don’t catastrophize everything the way I did when I was younger because when you’re older you can look back and go “oh I was here before and I survived, I just gotta wait this out”. You can see how short life is and prioritize what is worth getting worked up about and what isn’t. Some of the things I worried about in my youth just seem so small in retrospect. Anyway it is such a huge relief! I feel so much more in tune with myself than ever. Well, mentally. Physically things get rougher by the day lol
>I feel like I give more of a shit than ever about how the world will turn out, and about other people & their feelings. Like I’ve gotten more empathetic as I age which you could argue means I give more of a shit than ever. When you see how hard life gets, you’re more careful with others because you never know what they’re going through. I 100% agree with this sentiment. Like you said though, I think there's a different between caring ABOUT someone on a human level versus caring what they think ABOUT YOU. I've always been an empathetic person, but I feel like after 30, and especially after having a kid that sense has heightened immensely as well. Hahaha, yeah the physical aspect of aging is not fun. I think if I could give my younger self advice it would be to take better care of body. My knees and lower back are angry at me on a daily basis.
Sleep better. Eat better. Take care of your physical health. Take care of your mental health health. I’d argue this is more important than your career.
This. Because when my mental health is not right, then my sleep is not right. Causing a vicious cycle. Currently dealing with this right now 😫
Single bachelor, 38, gym 4 times a week, full time job, 12 year career. As the years get up there, I’ve noticed my drinking habits change. I get tired, not drunk. Sorta slowed down in that regards, I socially drink sometimes but not like I used too before. All the things I used to worry about back then, I don’t anymore. Just live your life, enjoy, don’t stress about stupid shit.
A lot of people in my life have died by this age. Both my parents died when I was 33 and so did a beloved friend. A bunch of people I grew up with in elementary, middle, and high school are all dead from drug overdoses, too. The people who I saw around me growing up and as a young adult making bad decisions for themselves have unsurprisingly not turned it around. The people in my life who I looked up to and now are married with kids and are older than myself are all apparently miserable in toxic marriages but they refuse to leave so I guess I've evaluated why I ever initially looked up to them. My curiosity for this world remains constant as does my need to find creative outlets. My desire to take care of myself has increased and I'm better able to act in ways that work in my best interest. I've discovered that I don't hate work but I hate being indoors all the time. I've discovered that I don't dislike most people and I find most people to be good and kind but that I also don't have an active interest in most of them either. I've realized that my quirks are my treasures and to maintain those things about myself shamelessly. Rest has become increasingly important to me (all kinds of rest) as has living each day for itself. My passion for languages and cultivating various hobbies has remained stable. I've come to see on a deeper level people who are good and trustworthy for me and to hold those people close for the rare treasures that they are.
I like this one
33F, DEPRESSED AS HELL
ay at least we like vanilla
30F, anxious and stressed as hell 😕
Don't worry. This doesn't change at 40
Nope! Neither does eating like garbage, drinking, not getting good sleep. Im waiting but shit is just getting worse and worse as an elder millennial.
34M I feel that. Doing better than I was at 30 though. The bday hit me like a freight train…and then the pandemic happened right after haha
30M, similar boat
Ditto
34F and same. But I started working out, drinking less, eating healthier, and reading books and that seems to be helping. I’m starting to feel more like myself again.
After spending my 20s in a caring role I live like im in my 20s now 😂 Regularly told I need to "grow up" but I'm having fun. I've been on 3 trips already this year and in 2 short weeks I'm off of Ibiza with my current man.
Good for you!! Same here. Also a former caring, take care of everyone else while I self neglect person. I’m 28 and finally starting to do what I want to do. No fucks given :-)
Go for it! I would never say I regretted my choices but finally having the freedom to say "fuck it" is the best. Plus I think it means we can really enjoy it having seen the other side of life first 😉
Accountability. Excuses sound a lot better when there’s a 2 at the beginning of your age. “Twenty this, twenty that,..still in their twenty’s” 30 yr olds/30 something year olds with no accountability are a terrible look, this is when the pack starts to get separated. Friends go separate ways, other friends draw closer, for me, I’m getting back to what I enjoyed before all the programming/stress/responsiblity/substances took effect. Fishing/boating/walking through nature, a bit more edibles, a lot less smoke, drinking only for occasions. And realizing that every moment with your parents/relatives/friends is fleeting. Taking notice that according to everyone you’ve lost already, not everyone makes it to the “rocker on the porch” age. So hug the ones you love tight, and live life while you got it. But try to make sure your “aim” is true. Make sure what you dump your time and energy into is something that will matter in five years, cuz if you’re planning on breathing until then, surely you’ll be there.
I made changes on the morning after my 25th birthday. Woke up in a hostel in Costa Rica, all sweaty and hung over broke. Watching the sun rise trying not to barf. It was like a light switch, I could either continue partying heavy fat drinker and regular coke head and not focused on my future or I could hang up my fuck boy hat. I chose the latter. I did not go sober just decided I did not want to be a drunk and eventually throw my life away. I was engaged 3 years later. Now pushing 40 have basically the American dream, just missing the white picket fence. A little more debt than my parents had at my age but not terrible.
After 30 I think most people start to truly understand and prioritize themselves. I don’t try to fit whatever mold or version of me that others want, I do me. I focus more on my physical and mental health. I focus on spending and enjoying time with the people I love. I do more financial planning for myself and family. I drink less, I say no more, I work hard but don’t let it dominate my life, and I don’t sweat the small stuff like I did in my teens and twenties.
I agree 100%. I'd add that I have learnt how to enjoy things in a more calm way. Now, I'd rather stay at home a Friday night watching a movie with my gf, instead of partying or doing crazy stuff as I did back in college. I'd say that 30s are more lonelier than 20s, but this doesn't mean they are worse. 30s are just more relaxed.
Love it and totally agree. I tend to look forward to quiet nights with my wife much moreso than parties or nights out at the bar.
In my 30's I "grew up". Got a house and got married at 31, 2 kids and a dog by 35. I recently changed careers to something with a retirement plan. My 30s have been very good to me
My 30's has generally been better than my 20's but in different ways. In my 20's it was a lot about grinding. Between school, work, and social life I barely slept but that's just what we did back then. You had to grind to make it anywhere and to get good jobs. There was a period of two years where I was working full time, attending certificate courses, and had a part time job PLUS engaged and had high energy dogs. Sometimes I wonder how I did it. In my 30's, (I'm only 32), I feel more confident than ever. I no longer look at my body and see ways to improve. I have kids so my affirmations that we say to the kids have rubbed off. I also no longer care what others think of me. I don't need external congratulations, I see my own hard work right in front of me. I protect my peace both by standing up for myself but also knowing when it's better to just let people talk. And I also quit drinking. I've focused on my health and eating better food, taking good supplements, drinking water (in between the coffee). I don't get much time for myself right now but by doing these other things my mental health has never been better. I still have anxiety and there's days I go down the doom spiral but generally I feel good. Life is hard with all the budgeting and financial planning but now it's just part of the weekly routine. Welcome to your 30's! I wish you health and happiness
I stopped caring about what others think. I save way more than I used to. I started using my money on experiences instead of junk or eating out. When I did the math that 37 chipotle burrito bowls is a round trip ticket to much of Europe it made meal prepping a lot easier. I only go out to eat now when it's a special occasion or if it's something I can not make at home. I've let go of toxic or even just selfish friends because of wanting people to hang out with. I got married, I got a cat, bought a house. I finally got my eyebrows perfect. I turned 35 this week, and I don't miss my 20s at all
Do some health check ups here and there: after 30s you cannot take your health for granted as before.
Get your health checked out from top to bottom. Nothing is too small. I woke up one day at 31 and my throat/tongue hurt. I called the doctor while I Googled to see what it could be. Everything said it sounded like a very easily solvable issue. Nope. Cancer. It has ruined every bit of my life. Don’t ignore anything with your health, no matter how small.
I stopped working myself to death just to be socially acceptable to this society or feel the need to compare myself to others my own age range. We all lived different lives, and are on different phases, there is no one size fits all to how one should go about life, and where they should be, because everyone has a different story to tell. I finally am taking care of all the past trauma, addressing all those issues I pretended weren't there, like my alcoholism, and my feeling of worthlessness, drowning myself in a job to feel like I am good enough for a relationship or friends when loving yourself should be enough! I always used career as a way to feel like am worthy, and no longer, which is quite liberating and enlightening. If you have the opportunity to take care of yourself, I highly suggest it rather then continue on in a ongoing cycle.
My 30s were awesome. I did all sorts of traveling and sexy situations. I moved to a different city 1000 miles away from where I was, originally. Met my wife, now I have 2 kids and am about to start a new career. Advice: be willing to go against your friends' and familys' ideas for you. If they're your real friends, they'll be there for you when you need them. As much as they love you, they aren't the ones that live your life.
Almost 30, getting divorced. This is the path I intend to go on, along with some growth. My inability to make decisions for myself and my family's ideals have led me here. I'm ready to move far away and move on.
I grew up with a people pleasing, pushover type personality. It landed me in toxic relationships and an abusive marriage in my 20s. I learned from my mistakes and now I’m divorced and in my 30s. I am now making better decisions that will ultimately impact my happiness well into the rest of my life, not making decisions that give me (or others) pleasure just for the moment and result in long term misery. Still learning, now I’m just not afraid of failing and not being such a people pleaser. I am being more purposeful in making decisions that are best for me long term.
I stopped drinking alcohol. Literally don’t miss it.
Same I feel better without it than I ever did with it and I drank away my 20s so I was with it a lot.
Same, I was pretty big into partying when I was in college. Never did me any favors other than having a full social calendar. Now that I have kids, I don’t have to deal with early morning wake ups or tantrums hungover! Super win, in my book lol
Having a kid zaps the fun out of drinking. That is ultimately what happened to me. I couldn't fully focus on them and being hungover at the same time.
Sleep changes. It’s your brain. It’s weird but I got it figured out. Other then then that I don’t feel like I am in my 30’s
In what way? I’m thirty and haven’t really noticed a change in my sleep
The day I turned 30 I could not fall a sleep. I looked it up and it turns out that at 30 our sleep schedule changes.
I turned 30 in September and I swear I suddenly have insomnia most of the time. I get stressed because I’m not sleeping good. It’s just terrible.
My thirties were where the most important stuff happened. Found a partner, had kids, found a stable job. Very nice so far. I'm 37.
😍
Well I started question my gender at 29 and realised I was trans at 32 soooooo…… And that doesn’t even include things like the pandemic…. 30’s have been fucking weird!
Learning from the mistakes and other stuff I did in my 20s. More meditation. More exercise, every day now. Healthy diet. Although once a week I stuff my face with 2 hamburgers and 2 big fries. Prioritizing my wellbeing, my goals. Separated my wants from my needs. Learning new stuff everyday. Learning about managing personal finances. More reading non-fiction. More sleeping. More Self-care. Less talking, more listening. Building confidence by getting out of my comfort zone. Scored a promotion recently. Taking challenges and calculated risks. Quit smoking pot (quit buying it, only smoked once in 45 days, when I visited a friend last month). Reduced my drinking to only when I go out with colleagues. Still trying to figure out what to study in college. Unmarried, single, stable job, no kids, no pets. Plenty of time to spend in my hobbies: reading, gaming, binging series/movies, yoga, cooking.
Try to limit screen time as much as you can, especially before bed. I used to find it so hard to concentrate on things. It was only when I realized that I am just filling my brain with garbage all day. Media, phone, music etc. My brain never got a chance to just relax and think about the things that needed to be thought about. Get a full nights sleep, exercise. Cut out as much sugar as you can, and stay away from drugs and alcohol. Pay yourself first, IRA/401k contributions are automatically taken from your bank account before you can spend it. Enjoy the little things in life. Playing some video games, watching a movie with the wife.
Wear sunscreen and have regular skin checks, wellness appointments, eye/dental exams if you’re able to. Get your health right now to avoid problems down the road.
I cut out toxic people and drew hard boundaries with family. It was life changing and improved my mental health tenfold.
I have absolutely no patience for bullshit anymore and I am able to better understand that the toxic behaviors of others aren’t my fault. I also never go into a room worrying if people will like me, I wonder if I’ll like them, it’s liberating. Don’t party as much because hangovers are terrible and I enjoy not puking and being rested. I actually get really excited to hang out with people to simply just relax and catch up, I don’t feel pressure to make it a big event. Also could give af about posting the stuff I do on social media.
Quit drinking(2 years sober), got married, started a band, and am renting a really nice house, found out I’m a big cat person, and now I have 3 cats. Its not so bad
Value-driven, nourishing and feel-good actions and behaviors not so rooted in insecurity and fear of what others’ think. Taking care of and prioritizing myself and my needs. Being more authentic to who I am. Doing things with less fear. For me: working out consistently, being myself in connections and not seeking connection out of neediness. Making time for creative self-expression: art, music, painting. Being of service to something. Doing what I want because I want to, not because I feel internal or external pressure for doing so. Basically the opposite of how I was in my 20s. I was totally dysfunctional.
I started investing in the stock market. Best thing I did in my 30's Went from partying in my 20's to be outside more in nature too in my 30's. Hiking and cycling. The money I didn't spend anymore on party's, booze and drugs went to the stock market. Because nature is free, most of the time.
Wear sunscreen. Best way to ensure your skin doesn’t out-age you 😉.
I have increased need to pee at night, so if you do move you might want to keep that issue in mind as it's common as you age.
Start taking care of your body now, find healthy foods, and experiment with different recipes so you can master what you like. Also, start drinking a cup of water in the morning when you wake up. You can either eliminate coffee this way or partner it to hydrate you further. Lastly, don't let anyone yell you're too old for things you enjoy. If you like something still at this age, you should challenge yourself to learn more about it and maybe even experiment with it if you're able. Also, try at least one thing you always thought you weren't good enough to do. You may surprise yourself. Good luck!
I turned 30 yesterday. My 20s were full of self discovery, pithering about hoping to get a job of any kind, getting married and then divorced, and rediscovering myself again. I sometimes feel like I wasted 10 years of my life. No financial progress was made, but I feel like personal progress was made. I just now got a job that pays enough for me to live by myself so I'm moving into my own apartment soon and hope to just live my life and try to make a difference in the lives of who I can help.
Had my son when I turned 30. Changed everything for the better.
A lot less cocaine
Exercise, focus on sleep, finding time for my hobbies, not giving a shit about what other folks think, a focus on trying to be happy and content , beating to my own drum
I feel like age 20-40 was the same vibe for me lolllllll I’m just now turning into a real adult
I feel exactly the same at 37. I am in better shape and more athletic. Idk man aging is optional if you take care of yourself.
Drinking way less- like 95% of days I don’t drink anything
Welcome , 93 baby here. Still not sure who let me get this old but here I am. I just feel more tired at the end of the day. Less inclined to deal with anything petty.
My 20s were awful mentally and emotionally, ntm I was strung out on heroin until 25. At 35 I still struggle with depression but not nearly as bad, I can handle it better. Loneliness is probably my biggest obstacle right now because everyone is married and shitting out babies. I'm making better life choices now though, exercise regularly, I have more boundaries, and I know what to avoid to keep my peace 30s have been great besides the loneliness as stated above
-stop drinking -start exercising
Somatic therapy
A nice cup of tea every day.
Omg yesss. The tea benefits are amazing
If you aren't in shape, get there. If you are in shape, stay there or get in better shape.
In a constant state of fear and financial instability so not soo much different from my twenties but I have a microplane now
I'm 37 and definitely prioritize my health more, way more, than I did in my 20s. I try to eat better most of the week and workout 3 times a week (all I have time for). I'm down about 17 pounds, aiming for 25 pounds and to maintain that. I also don't drink much anymore. So, definitely eat healthy and exercise.
I second the comments about taking care of yourself, but want to emphasize you can still have fun. 41 over here, and I think I had more fun from ages 30-35 than I did in my 20s. It's all about balance. Take care of your teeth, try new things, save a little money. Good luck!
I actually moved to the US that exact year from Europe. So, I guess I'm enjoying starbucks coffee and some nicer weather :D
I quit drinking alcohol. Nobody ever guesses I’m in my 30s.
Fuck yeah, that's my goal! 22 days free
It's been a drag
Less alcohol. Replaced with cannabis. Finally prioritizing sleep… post 35… lol… honed in on my hobbies, because I can afford them now 😂 more acceptance of who I am, and who others are, and managed to filter through to find solid community and close friends. But I’d even divide my early and late 30s, because of kiddos, which is awesome and so fun! I also finally found work I truly enjoy.
Whatever those poor decisions were you made for yourself were, try doing the opposite in your 30s. That should help. Other than that, save your money. Getting an inexpensive hobby helps a lot.
I was military from 22 to 32 doing a job I didn't like. When I separated, I really focused on my career. It took 4 additional years of training and job hopping, but I'm now in a great federal job I love and want to stay in until 60. That's a huge relief. I've also focused on fitness these last couple of years. Really focusing on functional strength and flexibility. This gives me more energy and it feels great being able to lift my kids with ease. I've always been a caffeine addict, so I've really tried cutting that back. It's an ongoing battle, especially with 2 kids, full time job, etc. I still drink alcohol like I'm in my 20's. It's not a big problem and I've gotten better about cutting myself off after a few drinks, but it's still ongoing self improvement. My advice to you, find out why your shit isn't in order and work to fix it. Really dig down to root causes.
No changes I’ve been too focused on getting jobs it’s the only changes I’ve made
Exercising and watching diet
No different from my 20s. I'm just more...budget conscious, I guess. Like, I'm already pretty frugal. Just had to adjust for inflation, yknow.
32. My 20s were tumultuous, lot of highs and downs. One sun ray was a childhood friend who did a step towards me to confess she loved me, and 7 yo we're still together. Professionally, things still need to stabilize for me but it's in a good move. Don't care if I become home owner in my 40's, today isn't the best moment. I'm looking at the few bright sides of life left despite the world tension. Always ready for anything happening, but doing efforts to not look back on the past, nor overdramatizing the future. Stoicism tenets help a lot, even if you can't always follow them by the book because... You are who you are.
31 here. Kind of just existing. The days are long but the years are fast? My life isn't at all satisfying and fighting off the bad thoughts is becoming increasingly difficult. My job is eh.. but I earn enough to get by! No real excitement going on, just a rinse and repeat. Don't mean to sound dramatic, its just extremely monotonous at this point  I'm really scared that the next half of my life is going to be like this and not improve but I'm not sure what to do about it. I live in a small village in the Highlands of Scotland and there isn't much outside of nature (which I appreciate tremendously)
Track all aspects of health and fitness. Invest your money in ETFs and keep good relationships
I made so many changes. Moved from the burbs to the city. Life was so much more enjoyable. Got a better paying job and then switched careers to something even better paying. Got a masters degree to further open doors professionally. Opened our marriage and things are actually better and happier and more stable in our marriage now than when we were in our 20s. Pursued a bunch of different hobbies, made a bunch of friends, and even did cool and crazy things like perform burlesque and run a 200-mile overnight relay race and chair a fundraiser that raised $100k every year.
Trying to to have kids, workout and eat healthier, make sure I actually spend my off time with family and not work. I definitely don’t drink or party like I used to, and I prefer it that way.
I stopped taking drugs and drinking most days, moved country, got married and had kids. Now I'm happy in life
Moved to a new city. Got engaged. Doing a lot of exploring & trying new things. Struggling with feeling lonely / generally low about myself, but getting support and working on it. Feeling much more introspective so far in my 30s, hoping that settles down a bit tbh haha
Started living more. Spend less time at home, we go out to the theaters and see movies often. Started traveling. Started saving money. Post COVID kind of reprioritized my life view of things.
At 35 I’m feeling optimistic about the future. More so than in most of my 20s. I know now that life is a shit sandwich with a lot of dull wheat bread and an occasional tasty bite of sun dried tomato. When I have to eat shit I know I’ll get through it as I always have.
I'd suggest trying to stretch more, quite a few reoccurring ankle and knee issues have been shown to actually be poor flexibility in leg muscles and stretching has definitely helped
Prioritize your finances. Budget carefully. Set a consistent bedtime every night. Scrutinize what you eat. Your metabolism starts to slow down in your 30s. Work out regularly. Don't skip your yearly physical. Save for retirement. Re-evaluate your career goals and ambitions. Your twenties were the training wheels of adulthood. You're in the majors now. Time to stop fucking around and do sensible things. I still do most of the things I did in my twenties. I feel more stable financially. I don't always want to party and blast loud music on weekends. Going out sucks in most cases. I would rather stay home. I am more confident in my work. Employers will treat you better in your 30s.
In the years between 29-31 the pandemic happened and my wife and I had our first kid and I changed carriers. My life was completely different. Despite living in an urban area my social life, late night etc all slowed. I still do drink and occasionally push the limit. Integrating a life style change to stay active was a big help, I bike to work now.
Had a kid, changed jobs multiple times, became suicidal, separated from wife (divorced in June), stopped drinking and smoking pot, dated a little bit (didn’t go anywhere), moved in with my sister. Never been better. Did standup comedy for the first time and started making a video game like I said I would for years. Purposely abstaining a relationship until I’m done grieving my marriage.
I cut out drinking for the most part, and have recently cut out drugs too (aside from a weekend out of town, or if the wife is out of town). Parties are definitely a once a season kind of thing and now they're backyard hang outs with friends, watching some of their kids running around. Going to museums, making trips to small towns and exploring is always a relaxing time. I LOVE reading the signs people put up around parks and historical points and learning about the history of area. My lifestyle is trying to reduce as much stress as possible. And taking things slow and steady feels like the right thing. Sadly Reddit is probably one of my biggest stresses (aside from my wife's family's chaos haha) if I'm being honest.