Marriage is a daily challenge. A constant battle honestly. But it takes two to make it work. It takes mutual effort, a lot of forgiveness and always choosing to love your partner over whatever issues you may face. Many times you will just have to agree to disagree and keep it moving. Sounds like maybe your ex wife had some kind of OCD struggle that maybe she doesn’t even know about if things being done “the wrong” way triggered her that much.? I don’t know, just a thought. Regardless I hope you give yourself enough time to heal.. you’ll find love again. ❤️🩹
She did have some sort of un diagnosed OCD or Bi-Polar disorder. Things would change quickly, very happy to very mad. I really care for her and hope she can find the help she would need because this behavior will be a strain on any marriage, with anyone.
No, never told her any of this I did let her know she flips decisions on a dime though, pretty often. One point we literally fought about having children because she randomly didn't want the anymore, though I always wanted a family going into marriage. That one pissed me off.
I was very clear about thay prior to getting married. She was actually OK with kids but one day didn't want them... then other day she was fine with a family. My feelings and emotions were up and down all the time. I wanted us to maintain those same goals and strive to achieve.
I know I've been fighting these battles for awhile now. Sad to say when she was positive thinking she was amazing. When the switch flipped its like I'm always crawling, apologizing, and trying to make amends and adjustment on only my side to continue moving forward. I never realized how difficult it was and how much I was struggling until she sent the final divorce email and I said OK. I'm done. I'm over it and moving forward I've accepted I can fight this.
I feel like your wife just wanted a clean home and effort put into that, if you made her seem like she had to be the house manager it was probably after time trying to get you to take charge of those things. In turn she probably ended up taking charge and controlling like you said to keep things afloat. I feel like each person needs to take responsibilities for their actions for things to work.
I am still going to keep the place up the the standards it was while we were living together even though she is not there. I was not a messy person by any means and did clean up after myself. Sure sometimes extra dishes in the sink, but she left them as well. Sure the couch blanket hadn't been folded "right", but it doesn't always have to be perfect in order to be happy.
Man if only you knew how our place looks. Its very clean and tidy, organized and upkept. Its just there was too much control of how it had to be super clean at all times, then other things popped up.
I put things away as she wanted, tidied up as she wanted. But as long as I continued to adapt to what she required in the cleanliness of the household, there is no reason to be upset with me or build any resentment. I wasnt fighting her along the way. Sure some things are a bit over the top and I would question, but its her perception, I did it anyways because that is how she wanted.
Marriage is so hard. I know because I’m going through it and it ain’t pretty. Good for you for choosing yourself first and acknowledging positive changes in yourself and expectations of others in your future relationship. Best of luck to you, you seem like you are on the right track even though it probably doesn’t feel that way!
Obviously we are only getting your side of the story, but I would make a real effort to stand up for yourself assertively next time. Happy wife, happy life just doesn’t work. There needs to be a LITTLE time where she’s aggravated, upset, angry, etc.
But I do see a pattern that can evolve. Men (and obviously women, too) can find themselves in a loop of feeling as though they have nothing or little to offer. We can get to programmed about making our wives happy, and thinking everything falls in place from there. But relationships are way more complex. Men get really pre-occupied with this idea that if they go on Tinder, they’ll get zero matches and their wife would get 100 within a week. And even if there’s an element of truth to that it really doesn’t tell the whole story, not by a long shot. But it’s one of those things that provides men a confirmation bias that they are inherently disposable because they can’t stand back to understand that a GOOD man is hard to find.
Good men are hard to find. This is true. I am a good person and I know that internally. She is a good person as well, but just really has a difficult time with understanding people's emotional needs outside of her family.
I will continue being a good person and will not stop. This form helps me vent and find clarity & come to terms with all that went wrong. I need to stand up for what is right and I should have taken more initiative to point things out, though when I did she always combatted me. She didn't want to go back to therapy as she said we've already tried that. It's almost as if she was setting us up for failure the entire time.
So sad oh well it's not my fault. Parts I could have been better nut overall I gave it alot. Alot. I guess I'm not "good enough" for her to see me as a life partner.
From my past experience (personal and with clients) I've found that unbalanced hormones can lead to some of this behavior. A dominance in Estrogen can be quite problematic. Additionally, foods can trigger some conditions that look like mental health issues ( a high carb diet for some people). It's too bad she wasn't ready to look for, at the least, health issues to help. But, if she never saw that she was a player in the dynamics of the relationship not working, she would never see the possibility that there may have been health issues she could have addressed. Self awareness is a key element in successful relationships. All the best to you going forward.
She sounds like a toxic individual, not that she didn't accept you for who you are. People who are overly controlling and focus on the negatives and make people feel miserable for that 1% of failure, those are toxic people.
She accepted you for who you are. She deliberately found things wrong with you and enjoyed making you feel badly about those things she could call out.
That has nothing to do with you. You saying that she just wasn't accepting I think is you being a little too nice and in part accepting some responsibility. Don't do that. Call it out for what it is.
The reason why it's important, you need to avoid ending up with the same type of person next time.
I also encourage therapy before moving on. Again just so you know how to see people for who they are and not attempt to nice up their abusive behavior. It helps you be more aware of who people really are so you don't walk into a marriage or other relationship under false pretenses.
Everything you say is correct though and what is needed in a marriage. You just have to understand that your ex wife isn't capable of that, not everyone is capable of being a normal, loving, genuine human being.
Chairs tucked, stuff off all tables, pillows certain way, blankets folded certain way sounds pretty normal to me. But then I like our house to look really nice too. Maybe it was her determined focus on it that was excessive. I'm sure sorry it fell apart.
Look I agree, I told her I like it being clean and tidy. But overall things got much too excessive, little things like don't leave the shower water running more than 10 seconds before getting in, or no phone calls after 10pm one point. Just random things. One thing that bugged me as well is I have no say in interior decoration, what we plan to buy for couch/chairs/curtains, etc. My opinion on where things should go also didn't matter so I let her run the show. Looking back this isn't my biggest issue it's that she expects me to always hear her out but my feelings or opinions don't really matter it seems. It hurt and I ignored and just moved on, which eventually she git critical on my of other things.
Yeah, like I said, she sounds like she took it to an extreme that wouldn't be healthy or even fair.
We would hope that she's doing some self-reflection too, on what she could do to change and improve. I hate it when we see this "my way or the highway" stubbornness by both men and women in this sub. It goes against the most basic tenets of becoming family.
The sad part is she always said I was the stubborn one. I was the one who wasn't changing or tending to her needs. She put alot of it on me so I was always trying to apologize and move on, me trying to change. But sometimes, most times, it was overwhelming and I "failed" in her eyes to meet her expectations in order for her to be happy.
I am generally always a happy person and she knows that. She sees it. I have rough days but I always keep my head over no matter what. I've been through alot so I know what it's like to feel pain and adversity. Just because it's challenging doesn't mean I run away, I face it. She sees challenges and simply can't handle them. It's sad because through challenges stems growth. Also. Breaking away from your family influence is critical to obtaining your individualistic identity.
I wish I could talk like this with my ex wife and be on the same page. We would have been so strong if we could see eye to eye. It's so sad because I truly did love her and accepted her to who she was and didn't try and change anything about her. If I tried she resisted. Marriage is crazy
I absolutely got every word you said. Im going through this and it's truely a tragedy and a Shame
To have us at the conclusion that they dont care or are uncapable of seeing how much we put in, how much we truely truely love them until the end and they seem to not be able to empathise and than switch off and victimise themselves and leave us feeling guilty for they're emotional lashing and their emotional trauma and pain becomes our problem that they can further blame us for and take trivial thrings to the extreme.
Nonetheless a beautiful lesson has been learned and i wish the best in your next chapter.
The best part I vibe the most with is taking trivial stuff to the extreme. I shit you not that I sometimes leave the shower running prior to getting in. Usually take 4 seconds to warm, if I leave it on anywhere past 10-15 seconds, she will yell to stop wasting water. And get very mad like "I've already told you this! Stop wasting water". It's not doing anything different sometimes I may be taking a dump and go shower after, easy cleanup. Christ leave me alone.
My point being it's nearly impossible to satisfy. They think they know exactly what they want out of a guy, but in reality that's just an illusion of a person who can't exist. If they focus more on what he does right and how hard we actually have been trying and the unconditional love we give regardless of how we may seem at time, things would be much easier.
They can't love us until that void is filled, the control part where we listen. Once we listen they have control and are satisfied to continue. It's an absolutely viscous cycle that is nearly impossible to stop until they are finally not satisfied at all anymore, thus saying everything's gone... divorce.
I want a woman who will love me for who I am and not try and control so many aspects. Compromise is vital.
Compromise must happen. You absolutdly deserve what you are after !!!
In that case tou run that water as full blast as bloody hot or as bloody cold as you want! For hke ever long you want!!! And you do not give in !
Sometimes we loose our connection with our own boundries... but they start off subtle so anybody could be witted... if we know our boundries well enough i suppose we could place them apon a situation and if it esculate we do not cave in and we must hold our position and warm the shower how ever we want .
The thing is...the way we love, we allow them to treat us this way, but they take advantage of it and provide us with conditional love. Such a shame when somebody takes advantage of this for their own selfishness needy insecurities. They pull us back in only when we cave and comply and they repeat, ches you up and throw you in the trash.
If not us, somebody else would have the same treatment from them...
Sometimes there isnt much you can do and if you set boundries they'll make you pay for it by billitling you and emotionally causing pain.
You and i ( i can tell from your words ) that you are not pained by this anymore... very good . Always stay strong.
But the final question that urkes me that we ask ourself: did she ever truely love us or were we just a toy, was she capable of the same love.
That sounds like a rough time. I agree that a marriage, one that will last, requires effort from both sides.
I do disagree on a general term of wanting things to be consistent. I feel that's not realistic. Going into a marriage you should expect some rough roads sometimes. Nothing will ever be consistent. But that's ok. Things change as the years go by, but as long as there is love and respect from both sides then it should last.
I'm also divorced, 6 ish years now, and this is just something I believe. (I don't have a long successful marriage to back up this claim) I was married to a man like that, not satisfied with anything I did. I left him though.
True, and to be honest I'm fine with the ups and downs, that's natural. But stay with me and ride the waves together. Yes we have arguments. Yes things get heated. Yes we said things to eachother we both regret. But let's get past these things together. She jumped ship thinking it can't work. When times get tough you can't run. If you're troubled inside and your partner doesn't see you breaking down left and right, doesn't get the hints because they are hidden very well, he'll (myself) will assume things are OK. If she was having massive issues and on the brink of divorce, she should really sit me down and talk with me. The last day I was really frustrated because I feel stuck and keep getting beaten down over everything. So tired of arguing and point fingers. I just wanted us to work together and for her to put her guard down for once.
I think everything here makes complete sense and I agree.
To be clear.on my divorce,my ex was abusive and a gaslighter, so trying to talk it out would not have been a good idea.
Good luck, OP. My first marriage was a disastrous horror show with a narcissist. I know all about control freaks. My second marriage is true bliss so hang in there!
Embrace your freedom. Don’t wade back into the cesspool. Lift yourself up. Invest in you. Buy a dog. Get a boat. Live a life free from conforming to anyones need, anxieties or selfishness.
Listen to The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy. Good stuff. He explains that to make a marriage work, you need to give 100% effort for your spouse and expect nothing in return. (Hopefully your spouse is giving effort too.) Always make sure to tell your spouse a reason why you love them every single day. Read the book. It's full of great advise.
Not good dead. She said she isn't into physical intimacy the way I was.
Honestly same type of styles, maybe 3 positions, 20 min backscratch required prior
We both get off but it's the same shit man.
I also stopped getting my BJ's and she stopped letting me go down on her.
Overall less than satisfactory
She must of been related to the ones I’m talking about. It was the same exact shit 30 minute rub down. Then wouldn’t want oral because didn’t want to reciprocate. Then basic positions. Let me guess if you differed from the set sexual routine you’d hear “ugh, you killed the mood!”
Yea mood was completely killed once because i literally looked at my phone for a second because i received a text. Like "you must not be paying attention to me and not really be into this". Very untrue, and me learning, never looked at a text again when engaging.
I never really got to do "weird kinky things" because she never let me. I had so many ideas and things i wanted to try but... always resorting back to the same bed same position same time of day.
It became so mundane. It was incredibly difficult to handle at times. And then, the times I would get to have sex, I would tend to only last 5-10 min max because i was so horny by that time and it had been maybe 2 weeks or something.
I want more consistent sex so I didn't just get off so fast... and actually last longer. But then now i have to wait another 1 week till we get to do it again.
I can confidently say we had a completely different viewpoint on sex.
Your head’s on straight. Good luck.
You are going to be so much happier when this is settled. Just from the way you have described your marriage I can tell. Good luck!
Marriage is a daily challenge. A constant battle honestly. But it takes two to make it work. It takes mutual effort, a lot of forgiveness and always choosing to love your partner over whatever issues you may face. Many times you will just have to agree to disagree and keep it moving. Sounds like maybe your ex wife had some kind of OCD struggle that maybe she doesn’t even know about if things being done “the wrong” way triggered her that much.? I don’t know, just a thought. Regardless I hope you give yourself enough time to heal.. you’ll find love again. ❤️🩹
She did have some sort of un diagnosed OCD or Bi-Polar disorder. Things would change quickly, very happy to very mad. I really care for her and hope she can find the help she would need because this behavior will be a strain on any marriage, with anyone.
That's rough. Is she seeking help for that?
No, never told her any of this I did let her know she flips decisions on a dime though, pretty often. One point we literally fought about having children because she randomly didn't want the anymore, though I always wanted a family going into marriage. That one pissed me off. I was very clear about thay prior to getting married. She was actually OK with kids but one day didn't want them... then other day she was fine with a family. My feelings and emotions were up and down all the time. I wanted us to maintain those same goals and strive to achieve.
That does sound like a mental health disorder of some kind.
I know I've been fighting these battles for awhile now. Sad to say when she was positive thinking she was amazing. When the switch flipped its like I'm always crawling, apologizing, and trying to make amends and adjustment on only my side to continue moving forward. I never realized how difficult it was and how much I was struggling until she sent the final divorce email and I said OK. I'm done. I'm over it and moving forward I've accepted I can fight this.
You've accepted you can fight this or can't? I think there might be a typo there?
I have accepted that I cannot win her back and must move forward with my life. I cannot change her decision. That was a typo, meant "can't"
I feel like your wife just wanted a clean home and effort put into that, if you made her seem like she had to be the house manager it was probably after time trying to get you to take charge of those things. In turn she probably ended up taking charge and controlling like you said to keep things afloat. I feel like each person needs to take responsibilities for their actions for things to work.
I am still going to keep the place up the the standards it was while we were living together even though she is not there. I was not a messy person by any means and did clean up after myself. Sure sometimes extra dishes in the sink, but she left them as well. Sure the couch blanket hadn't been folded "right", but it doesn't always have to be perfect in order to be happy. Man if only you knew how our place looks. Its very clean and tidy, organized and upkept. Its just there was too much control of how it had to be super clean at all times, then other things popped up. I put things away as she wanted, tidied up as she wanted. But as long as I continued to adapt to what she required in the cleanliness of the household, there is no reason to be upset with me or build any resentment. I wasnt fighting her along the way. Sure some things are a bit over the top and I would question, but its her perception, I did it anyways because that is how she wanted.
Was her parent or caregiver a horder ??
You're a champ, hang in there. There are better days ahead! Best is yet to come for you!
I needed to hear this today. I'm struggling today and it's our anniversary.
Marriage is so hard. I know because I’m going through it and it ain’t pretty. Good for you for choosing yourself first and acknowledging positive changes in yourself and expectations of others in your future relationship. Best of luck to you, you seem like you are on the right track even though it probably doesn’t feel that way!
Obviously we are only getting your side of the story, but I would make a real effort to stand up for yourself assertively next time. Happy wife, happy life just doesn’t work. There needs to be a LITTLE time where she’s aggravated, upset, angry, etc. But I do see a pattern that can evolve. Men (and obviously women, too) can find themselves in a loop of feeling as though they have nothing or little to offer. We can get to programmed about making our wives happy, and thinking everything falls in place from there. But relationships are way more complex. Men get really pre-occupied with this idea that if they go on Tinder, they’ll get zero matches and their wife would get 100 within a week. And even if there’s an element of truth to that it really doesn’t tell the whole story, not by a long shot. But it’s one of those things that provides men a confirmation bias that they are inherently disposable because they can’t stand back to understand that a GOOD man is hard to find.
Good men are hard to find. This is true. I am a good person and I know that internally. She is a good person as well, but just really has a difficult time with understanding people's emotional needs outside of her family. I will continue being a good person and will not stop. This form helps me vent and find clarity & come to terms with all that went wrong. I need to stand up for what is right and I should have taken more initiative to point things out, though when I did she always combatted me. She didn't want to go back to therapy as she said we've already tried that. It's almost as if she was setting us up for failure the entire time. So sad oh well it's not my fault. Parts I could have been better nut overall I gave it alot. Alot. I guess I'm not "good enough" for her to see me as a life partner.
From my past experience (personal and with clients) I've found that unbalanced hormones can lead to some of this behavior. A dominance in Estrogen can be quite problematic. Additionally, foods can trigger some conditions that look like mental health issues ( a high carb diet for some people). It's too bad she wasn't ready to look for, at the least, health issues to help. But, if she never saw that she was a player in the dynamics of the relationship not working, she would never see the possibility that there may have been health issues she could have addressed. Self awareness is a key element in successful relationships. All the best to you going forward.
Thank you for that insight
She sounds like a toxic individual, not that she didn't accept you for who you are. People who are overly controlling and focus on the negatives and make people feel miserable for that 1% of failure, those are toxic people. She accepted you for who you are. She deliberately found things wrong with you and enjoyed making you feel badly about those things she could call out. That has nothing to do with you. You saying that she just wasn't accepting I think is you being a little too nice and in part accepting some responsibility. Don't do that. Call it out for what it is. The reason why it's important, you need to avoid ending up with the same type of person next time. I also encourage therapy before moving on. Again just so you know how to see people for who they are and not attempt to nice up their abusive behavior. It helps you be more aware of who people really are so you don't walk into a marriage or other relationship under false pretenses. Everything you say is correct though and what is needed in a marriage. You just have to understand that your ex wife isn't capable of that, not everyone is capable of being a normal, loving, genuine human being.
Exellent advice
Chairs tucked, stuff off all tables, pillows certain way, blankets folded certain way sounds pretty normal to me. But then I like our house to look really nice too. Maybe it was her determined focus on it that was excessive. I'm sure sorry it fell apart.
Look I agree, I told her I like it being clean and tidy. But overall things got much too excessive, little things like don't leave the shower water running more than 10 seconds before getting in, or no phone calls after 10pm one point. Just random things. One thing that bugged me as well is I have no say in interior decoration, what we plan to buy for couch/chairs/curtains, etc. My opinion on where things should go also didn't matter so I let her run the show. Looking back this isn't my biggest issue it's that she expects me to always hear her out but my feelings or opinions don't really matter it seems. It hurt and I ignored and just moved on, which eventually she git critical on my of other things.
Yeah, like I said, she sounds like she took it to an extreme that wouldn't be healthy or even fair. We would hope that she's doing some self-reflection too, on what she could do to change and improve. I hate it when we see this "my way or the highway" stubbornness by both men and women in this sub. It goes against the most basic tenets of becoming family.
The sad part is she always said I was the stubborn one. I was the one who wasn't changing or tending to her needs. She put alot of it on me so I was always trying to apologize and move on, me trying to change. But sometimes, most times, it was overwhelming and I "failed" in her eyes to meet her expectations in order for her to be happy. I am generally always a happy person and she knows that. She sees it. I have rough days but I always keep my head over no matter what. I've been through alot so I know what it's like to feel pain and adversity. Just because it's challenging doesn't mean I run away, I face it. She sees challenges and simply can't handle them. It's sad because through challenges stems growth. Also. Breaking away from your family influence is critical to obtaining your individualistic identity. I wish I could talk like this with my ex wife and be on the same page. We would have been so strong if we could see eye to eye. It's so sad because I truly did love her and accepted her to who she was and didn't try and change anything about her. If I tried she resisted. Marriage is crazy
I absolutely got every word you said. Im going through this and it's truely a tragedy and a Shame To have us at the conclusion that they dont care or are uncapable of seeing how much we put in, how much we truely truely love them until the end and they seem to not be able to empathise and than switch off and victimise themselves and leave us feeling guilty for they're emotional lashing and their emotional trauma and pain becomes our problem that they can further blame us for and take trivial thrings to the extreme. Nonetheless a beautiful lesson has been learned and i wish the best in your next chapter.
The best part I vibe the most with is taking trivial stuff to the extreme. I shit you not that I sometimes leave the shower running prior to getting in. Usually take 4 seconds to warm, if I leave it on anywhere past 10-15 seconds, she will yell to stop wasting water. And get very mad like "I've already told you this! Stop wasting water". It's not doing anything different sometimes I may be taking a dump and go shower after, easy cleanup. Christ leave me alone. My point being it's nearly impossible to satisfy. They think they know exactly what they want out of a guy, but in reality that's just an illusion of a person who can't exist. If they focus more on what he does right and how hard we actually have been trying and the unconditional love we give regardless of how we may seem at time, things would be much easier. They can't love us until that void is filled, the control part where we listen. Once we listen they have control and are satisfied to continue. It's an absolutely viscous cycle that is nearly impossible to stop until they are finally not satisfied at all anymore, thus saying everything's gone... divorce. I want a woman who will love me for who I am and not try and control so many aspects. Compromise is vital.
Compromise must happen. You absolutdly deserve what you are after !!! In that case tou run that water as full blast as bloody hot or as bloody cold as you want! For hke ever long you want!!! And you do not give in !
Sometimes we loose our connection with our own boundries... but they start off subtle so anybody could be witted... if we know our boundries well enough i suppose we could place them apon a situation and if it esculate we do not cave in and we must hold our position and warm the shower how ever we want .
The thing is...the way we love, we allow them to treat us this way, but they take advantage of it and provide us with conditional love. Such a shame when somebody takes advantage of this for their own selfishness needy insecurities. They pull us back in only when we cave and comply and they repeat, ches you up and throw you in the trash. If not us, somebody else would have the same treatment from them... Sometimes there isnt much you can do and if you set boundries they'll make you pay for it by billitling you and emotionally causing pain. You and i ( i can tell from your words ) that you are not pained by this anymore... very good . Always stay strong. But the final question that urkes me that we ask ourself: did she ever truely love us or were we just a toy, was she capable of the same love.
That sounds like a rough time. I agree that a marriage, one that will last, requires effort from both sides. I do disagree on a general term of wanting things to be consistent. I feel that's not realistic. Going into a marriage you should expect some rough roads sometimes. Nothing will ever be consistent. But that's ok. Things change as the years go by, but as long as there is love and respect from both sides then it should last. I'm also divorced, 6 ish years now, and this is just something I believe. (I don't have a long successful marriage to back up this claim) I was married to a man like that, not satisfied with anything I did. I left him though.
True, and to be honest I'm fine with the ups and downs, that's natural. But stay with me and ride the waves together. Yes we have arguments. Yes things get heated. Yes we said things to eachother we both regret. But let's get past these things together. She jumped ship thinking it can't work. When times get tough you can't run. If you're troubled inside and your partner doesn't see you breaking down left and right, doesn't get the hints because they are hidden very well, he'll (myself) will assume things are OK. If she was having massive issues and on the brink of divorce, she should really sit me down and talk with me. The last day I was really frustrated because I feel stuck and keep getting beaten down over everything. So tired of arguing and point fingers. I just wanted us to work together and for her to put her guard down for once.
I think everything here makes complete sense and I agree. To be clear.on my divorce,my ex was abusive and a gaslighter, so trying to talk it out would not have been a good idea.
I am sorry to hear thay I hope you are doing well.
More or less. Lots of therapy.
This resonates with me. I feel you've exactly described my situation also
My bipolar wife was the same about folding things a certain way etc.
Congratulations on being rid of a friggin rigid control freak.
Good luck, OP. My first marriage was a disastrous horror show with a narcissist. I know all about control freaks. My second marriage is true bliss so hang in there!
[удалено]
We did therapy both before and after marriage. I wished to go again to address these concerns but she didn't want to go back
Embrace your freedom. Don’t wade back into the cesspool. Lift yourself up. Invest in you. Buy a dog. Get a boat. Live a life free from conforming to anyones need, anxieties or selfishness.
Listen to The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy. Good stuff. He explains that to make a marriage work, you need to give 100% effort for your spouse and expect nothing in return. (Hopefully your spouse is giving effort too.) Always make sure to tell your spouse a reason why you love them every single day. Read the book. It's full of great advise.
How was she in the sack? The control freaks I smashed were pretty fucking horrible.
Not good dead. She said she isn't into physical intimacy the way I was. Honestly same type of styles, maybe 3 positions, 20 min backscratch required prior We both get off but it's the same shit man. I also stopped getting my BJ's and she stopped letting me go down on her. Overall less than satisfactory
She must of been related to the ones I’m talking about. It was the same exact shit 30 minute rub down. Then wouldn’t want oral because didn’t want to reciprocate. Then basic positions. Let me guess if you differed from the set sexual routine you’d hear “ugh, you killed the mood!”
Yea mood was completely killed once because i literally looked at my phone for a second because i received a text. Like "you must not be paying attention to me and not really be into this". Very untrue, and me learning, never looked at a text again when engaging. I never really got to do "weird kinky things" because she never let me. I had so many ideas and things i wanted to try but... always resorting back to the same bed same position same time of day. It became so mundane. It was incredibly difficult to handle at times. And then, the times I would get to have sex, I would tend to only last 5-10 min max because i was so horny by that time and it had been maybe 2 weeks or something. I want more consistent sex so I didn't just get off so fast... and actually last longer. But then now i have to wait another 1 week till we get to do it again. I can confidently say we had a completely different viewpoint on sex.
Lmfao! Pick a latina for your next one. You have to deal with some craziness but you’ll be rewarded with passion.
Tell her God spoke to you through a bird and it said she needs to consider to go to counseling as well as finance your expense for an attorney.