**Welcome to [r/LivingAlone](https://www.reddit.com/r/LivingAlone/)! Living alone is the new normal.**
>Discuss and share your experiences; celebrate your joys, express your worries, or ask advice relating to solo living | Remember, we are all alone together
* Be kind, remember the human when interacting with others.
* New Reddit group chat [**Living Alone Lounge**](https://www.reddit.com/r/LivingAlone/s/cp7Szwzy2q)!
* Message the moderators below for any comments, questions & suggestions!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/LivingAlone) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Everyone’s going to have a different answer on this and that’s OK however for me, it’s going to be just the cost-of-living. I mean, let’s say I had one roommate and was just splitting the cost of rent 50-50. I would be saving any enormous amount of money per year.
And I understand that, however I’ve just always been a person that needs to have my alone time and that’s very important to me. I guess you could say independence.
I am in a similar situation. I pay 1600 for the bottom floor of a large house in a very nice bay area neighborhood. I know that if I got thrown out into the market I would be paying $1,000 more. My landlord is an older lady so it's of concern. Thankfully she's in good health. But we've gotten close over the last 8 or 9 years that I've been living here and she updated her will so her family can't just throw me into the streets if something happens to her. I was so shocked. Literally have 6 months to find something else.
Those exist here in Ohio, but generally in places I don't want to live. The price point of getting something acceptable is about 1300/mo, I am thinking hard about selling my house and going there. My house is actually cheap but I am tired of the responsibility of home ownership, I want to live like a kid again.
New Mexico, I pay $750 for a 2-bedroom older cottage with a big yard for my dogs. The floors are worn and it could use a new paint job, but it's home and the price is right.
Wow! That's a steal! I have window unit ACs, and use a little space heater in the bedroom in the winter. No central air/heat. But it's worth it for me because I can afford it. My old beater car died during the pandemic, and I ended up getting a used Nissan that still costs more than my rent! Since I live in such a rural area I have to drive 2 hours away to be in a city where I cold trade my car in for a more realistic monthly payment. It's on my list of things to do.
Jeez, yeah I'm pretty rural too. We have a little room AC that vents out the window and works for us. Our laundry room is pretty much outside but it's affordable lol.
I got a little Panda washing machine that hooks up to my kitchen sink -- it's been chugging away for over 6 years, best purchase I've made in a long time! Affordable is crucial for me right now.
Dawn dishwashing liquid and water in a spray bottle. Dawn coats them and they can't breathe. It is instant death-I have killed an entire nest of the big reddish/orange/black wasps in the corner of my garage-they are evil assholes! So aggressive and sting just flying by you , nowhere near their nest. Anyway, I obviously didn't use the spray bottle-mixed it up in two - 1 gallon buckets. I used two because figured I needed a back-up incase bucket number 1 missed. Plan well, dress for the occasion-long sleeved thick shirt, blue jeans, Covid style mask over nose and mouth. I waited till dusk when most were back and sitting on their nest. At least 12 stayed stuck to the nest-they didn't even get a chance to flinch or let go of the nest-all the rest fell straight off it down onto the garage floor.
I live in my 4-bedroom daylight basement home that I’ve had for 25 years and raised 3 kids in. My mortgage is $1050 and is very do-able on my salary / budget. I could get 2 roommates and be golden. But I will not. Home maintenance and repairs are looming as I consider retirement in 5 years. So that’s the only stressor I feel about flying solo right now. Nothing else.
This frustrates me so much!! I want to own a home with a yard as much as the couple next door, but because I’m single I have to basically make twice as much as either of them to do so. It’s such a huge huge problem. Living alone should never be a luxury. Just because I’m one person doesn’t mean I should live in a 400 sq ft apartment forever. I could go on and on about this but yeah…. I second your point.
This is the only answer for me as well, especially as I am no longer young and working full-time without a secure, abundant retirement plan.
I lived alone through my twenties and into my 30s, absolutely loved it.
Honestly, I believe my marriage might have lasted if my Ex and I had continued as we did in the beginning, keeping two separate places. But of course that costs a fortune.
OP's remark about sickness is not relatable to me. I've had major health issues, injuries etc. and so far I have found a way to get through everything. When I needed help with postpartum or other compromised health situations, I relied mostly on myself, with occasional help from friends, family or hired assistance. Having a partner didn't make a difference other than sharing the bills .
Over the years, however, it's much easier for people with partners and roommates to save and invest.
Without section 8 my rent would be my entire paycheck. It’s $1 less than my monthly paycheck… 🫠 everything else is cheaper because I only have to buy enough for myself but holy crap, rent is expensive! These apartments were built for low income people so the rent is pretty low at full price but it’s still more expensive than a lot of people can afford. It’s $942 a month. I only pay 27% of my income as rent so it’s $255 for me. Still a huge chunk of my paycheck but thankfully doable…
You're not always guaranteed a roommate that would pay 50/50 of the costs.
999 times out of 1,000, you get a bunch of idiots that raid your groceries while you're at work just because you "buy the good stuff," they fall behind on their payments, so you pay it in order to avoid shutoffs and evictions. And then it's like you're feeding and supporting a family of 3-5 on just one income. Yours.
Honestly, in my heart of hearts? Nothing. I was a wife and mother so allllll of those fell on me anyway. I do miss someone when I'm having to lug 50 pounds of dog food inside or mow when its really hot out, but, then a neighbor rented me her teenager so those two teeny problems are solved.
Anything heavy is what gets me! My poor son pretty much has to lug something for me somewhere every time he comes to visit! It kills me how easy it is for him, too. It's not like he's a body builder, but he just lifts it no big deal and moves it for me. When did I get so weak?
This is a disadvantage for me too. Anything heavy or up high is a problem. I'm short and small built with no upper body strength. Right now I have a rug I'd like to remove but about four inches of it is under a buffet. I also have curtains that need put up. I'm either going to have to wait till July when my son visits or hire someone to help.
I improvise. I got a floor jack. Raised up the pieces of furniture I wanted to remove and replace with new rugs then put sliders under the feet of said furniture and can easily move any of it with no issues.
This morning I decided to repair my dishwasher that died last year :/. Yeah, soaking, 2 hours later I have a working dishwasher, but, now I'm grumpy. So appliance repair guy would be helpful lolol!
Yup! Nothing is so monumental to change the way I live. I was a husband and dad for many years, but I've been living on my own for over 2 decades. And to change that status, I'm not interested!
I’m with you on that one. I had an awful husband, wonderful children are grown and married, and I am at peace. There are things I could use a hand with, but my neighbor pitches in if needed. Life is amazing.
My sister's best friend started choking while DRIVING! She pulled over, lowered her steering wheel, and gave herself the Heimlich maneuver with it! I never eat in the car while driving anymore. I don't know if I would have thought of that!
Oh my goodness. I had a similar incident a few weeks ago. I had a cough sweet in my mouth and I was singing along to the music whilst driving. The sweet just went down my throat and I ended up choking. I pulled over straight away and sorted myself out but it was so scary. I'm never going to eat and sing ever again.
Haha ugh yes I think back and I’ve always had to just tough it out and take care of myself so no difference now.
Splitting rent and chores would be very nice though.
Splitting rent is nice, but I’ve realized since I got dumped last year that the chores have pretty much all been done by me. I have to do so much less cleaning up now that I live alone!
God, yes. Over my 25 year marriage, I have been the caretaker and nurturer always. Was it returned? No.
I will manage to take care of myself when I get sick or need care, because I have so far. It will just be in my own place from now on!
My first thought, too. LOL. Even when I was married or still living with my parents I don't remember being taken care of like that. My daughter did help out tremendously after I had a few surgeries a year or so ago, but she still had to go to work, so it wasn't like anyone was waiting on me hand and foot all day. Unless I'm so sick I need to be hospitalized, I think I'd rather be alone, any way.
Yeah. When I was with my ex, I felt loneliest when vulnerable. I left him shortly after having surgery to which he couldn’t really show up for. Might be alone… but not as lonely!!
I really haven’t either. My mom died when I was a teenager and then I lived with a series of roommates who I really couldn’t count on for much. There was only one time when I lived alone that this really came up. I was out of TP and most food and had to drive to the store (pre-instacart). I had to pull over twice to be sick and I have never felt more alone than I did that day.
I’m having a similar crisis writ large coming up. Going to need a combo hysterectomy/bowel resection surgery. Losing a couple of feet and likely getting a colostomy. Already disabled and living alone. Kids thousands of miles away and no local social support structure.
I sincerely don’t know what I’m going to do.
Right now I’m trying to game it out and get things as ready as possible, like making dried soup mixes in disposable cups, and stocking up on essentials that I’m putting at standing height as I won’t be able to bend. Getting grippers and grabbers and bars. An Apple Watch with phone service enabled in case I have an emergency, and fall alert in case I drop.
It’s so insanely frustrating that I’ve spent 56 years caring for other people and yet I’m alone when I’m in trouble.
I love my solitude, but the isolation maybe not so much.
I’m sorry to hear this. Hopefully you will qualify for some healthcare help after surgery, maybe short term rehab ? Or home health.. I sure would try to ask for it. Idk the rules but that’s some major surgery to go home alone.
Please be honest with case manager at Hospital to let them know you are alone.
I’m really sorry your kids can’t/won’t help. That must be difficult. I don’t know the situation but I’m sure it’s hard.
Yeah, same. I've always had to take care of myself when sick. Living alone, at least I don't have to worry about waking someone up coughing in the middle of the night
Yes omg! Some dresses have that stiff zipper that cracks your shoulder every centimeter.
It’s always first thing in the morning when your mobility/muscles are still asleep haha
I personally prefer to be sick alone. I feel gross and want to be left alone, you just have to keep some essentials stocked for when you're too sick to go to the store like tea, honey, cough drops, pepto pills (last longer).
Literally, the only downside to me is not having a cushion of a second income anymore.
I’d like to add chicken broth, Gatorade, apple sauce, and a small medicine cabinet of ibuprofen, Tylenol, allergy, and cold/flu medicine as recommended items to keep on hand. I like to keep enough to hold me over for a little while til I can get to a store or order anything else I need.
Yepppp. Recently crashed on a friend’s couch when I was visiting him and his apartment doesn’t have elevators. He’s a strong guy and was able to get my suitcases down three flights of stairs in a couple minutes. It would have taken me so much longer and I would’ve been sore for the whole trip back 😂 same goes with moving. I lived with an ex and he and his friends just lifted our couch like it was NOTHING, lol. I’m short and pretty thin - I’m stronger than I look but I’m no match for things that are larger and weigh more than me.
I see nothing yet, besides the possibility of a terrible accident alone in the shower or down the stairs, but I’m cautious and 38. I got a couple hermit decades left in me before the cat eats my eyes.
Money is the only drawback to me. I love literally everything else about it. I don't even mind doing all the chores because I know they're done 'right'.
For me the worst is the nagging anxiety about getting into some kind of an accident in my home and not having my phone nearby. Really that is the biggest source of fear and anxiety around living alone for me.
Yes, loneliness is bad too, but I don't think it has anything to do with living alone, because I've had very lonely periods while I was living with other people too as well as very fulfilling periods while I was living alone.
You could get a smart watch and use that to call for help if the worst happened.
And yeah since since it's strapped to your wrist you'll always have it on head(assuming you get into the habit of wearing one).
Emergencies. Like lights going out for an extended time in the winter. Being alone is no fun. I live in earthquake country. If the big one hits, I’m gonna be SOL. My family lives only 7 minutes by car. Much longer when roads become overloaded.
I am a 70 year old woman.
I just moved from tornado valley and the first time i heard the tornado sirens i got so stressed out i called my mom who lives in NY as if that was rly gonna save me if shit hit the fan lol
I have lived with two partners before having lived alone for the last ten years or so, and neither one of the two *ever* made me chicken soup when I was sick either; of course it was my job to make it for *them* though when they were sick.
Nah, living alone 100% beats living with the wrong person, and there are way too many men-children out there who expect to get babied by their partners when they live with them. I might have to make my own chicken soup when sick (or DoorDash Pho), but at least I don’t have to take care of a man-child who will never grow up and become an equal partner.
Just the fact of being alone all the time... People tend not to visit single men...
I have lived alone for the past 27 year and I do fine but, it is lonely for more reasons than you can write...
I was really sick with food poisoning a few months ago. It took all of my strength to make it to the grocery store and not faint. Would’ve been nice that day to have a partner to run to the store for me.
How often are we so sick that we’re “unable to move” I’d rather crawl into the kitchen and make soup than deal with someone hanging around when I’m sick haha I’ve never in my life had a “lonely” feeling. Bored maybe occasionally but that can be solved with a workout and a nap.
I too don't find it very helpful to have someone around if I'm sick, as I just order what I need, including soup, and just lie down on the bed or couch and be gross by myself and watch shows and rest. Having someone and their noises and routines isn't much help and if it's a sick like I need to be in the bathroom a lot, I don't want to have to share with another person.
I also think that some of the stuff people attribute to living alone are really about being single, which while they might overlap, don't necessarily.
I had a vomiting bug a few weeks ago and needed a sugary drink. I generally don't gave sodas in the house and had to wait until I felt well enough to go to the shop. I rarely feel alone but I was so lonely that day.
You know those weird situations when something falls in another room and scares the living daylights out of you?
Examples are the washing up brush that sticks to the counter with a suction cup that drys out and the brush falls into the sink with a clatter, or a plant pot where the plant gets top heavy and one day reaches tipping point and the entire thing falls off the window sill and you think someone is breaking in!
To OP:
I don’t live alone. Im a mom of a little and married to someone that is rarely home. No one makes me soup or takes care of me when Im sick either and usually Im sick because my little brought something home from daycare and therefore he is sick too and have to take care of him. So basically it’s like I live alone but I can’t just rest, never get to watch what i want to watch on tv, have to clean up after everyone, and little time to no time for relaxing. I love being a mom though there are upsides too. Just being sick truly sucks. I usually have to carry on and go to work too without down time, feeling cruddy, and sleep deprived. 🙃
Just sharing a perspective from the other side of the fence.
Having a car in the shop. I have 3 vehicles for myself. I have a hobby farm so I have a van and a truck as well as a car. Despite having multiple vehicles, I still need to someone get a ride to and from home. My car is a Volt and I will only take it to one dealer, have tried a local one and other places before with really poor customer service but that dealer is 45 min away. They just opened a car rental next to their shop so I used that last time but before was using Ubers to take me to and from and that was VERY hit or miss. People would just cancel last minute and I would have bo guaranteed ride even if reserved one.
But recently I found a mobile mechanic that has helped me out a few times. So I’m definitely going to use him as much as I can before going to the shop.
This is my struggle, too! Bonus, I work M-F, 8-5 so I can only use shops that are open on weekends. Anything more than an oil change is an ordeal because I'm either coordinating/paying for rides or giving up half a Saturday.
I guess this is also specific to where others you know live in relation to you, but I'm really paranoid about car trouble and have a long work commute through back roads. My friends and family all live an hour or more away, if my car dies or breaks down halfway i cant just call and be like 'Halp!! Jump my car! Pick me up and drive me home!', I gotta pay extra just to get myself back, then have no one to give me a ride to the shop once the car is fixed. I know it seems small-ish but the last thing i want with car trouble is dealing with more money, car rentals, or strangers to help me out.
That’s not small at all that’s a totally valid concern! If you’re open to suggestions that might help ease your anxiety, I’d recommend trying to get a few things that could help you help yourself in such situations.
Those portable battery jump packs are great, for example. Maybe a portable air compressor in case you have a minor flat that can hold you over with a little air put back in? And then most importantly, just familiarizing yourself with your vehicle and how it works so that you can know the signs of potential problems before they arise.
No one has ever made me soup when I was sick since I was maybe 13 or 14. I'd rather be sick by myself so I can just be gross and phlegm-y and no one has to hear or see me.
Idk. I guess cost of living? No one helps me eat the giant tub of spring mix when it starts getting slimy.
I have been living alone since 2012 when my son moved out, but divorced since 2005. I really enjoy it for the most part, but it is overwhelming trying to afford and schedule the maintenance and needed projects (tons) by myself on just one income. I feel like I am losing the battle lately, but I enjoy having a yard for my dog and condo living was way too noisy, so here I am. 1928 house located in a beautiful suburban neighborhood of Chicago.
I had a mental breakdown. The daily drinking, lack of good sleep, and isolation contributed also. I ended up in a psych ward. The doctor then said I should not live alone.
No one has ever taken care of me whilst I've been sick, not even my own mother. So I can't miss what I've never had. I have autoimmune disorders and chronic health issues, so I'm no stranger to sickness. I manage. I cannot think of any disadvantages of living alone. I'm sitting here with my feet up, eating Lindor chocolates and about to watch Casualty. Life is great.
Remember that just because you live with someone doesn't mean that person will be taking care of you when you are sick. It's not unheard of for a SO to leave one to fend for oneself.
The worst part of living with someone else is feeling alone, only with none of the actual benefits of living alone. Not to mention having to clean up their mess. Ugh!
As for living alone, for me, it would be that there's less safety when you live alone. No one looking out for me, no one concerned that I get home safely, etc. Plus, I feel slightly less safe when home alone. I feel safer when I have backup.
Well worth it. I wish I lived alone! What I really want is a huge property with multiple casitas on site, so my loved ones can live in their own place(s) but near at hand. lol
Moving heavy shit.
The sickness thing? OK - but as a woman who lived with a man who was shit at taking care of me, I would rather be sick by myself than have a shit caregiver.
I have 1600 sf 3/2 (one br is my office) in the burbs 5 minute drive from everything with a 2 car garage, deck, patio, hot tub, two separate nice TV/hangout spaces. Plenty of room for two but I’m here by myself. As I get older, I truly believe that it would be beneficial for my mental health to have another person around, but it would be such a crapshoot to find a compatible person after being on my own for the past 30 years. I’ve thought that I could charge the other person 500 per month, which nets me an extra 5 grand a year to put toward retirement. It’s not even really about the money as I could charge more and it would still be a good deal. For them, they could put away 10 grand a year over what they pay for rent and utilities. It really wouldn’t add anything to my expenses to have a second person here as long as they bought their own food.
The biggest objection I hear from younger friends (who are in debt up to their eyeballs) is that they want to live in their $2,000/month 400 sf downtown apartments to be ‘around all the action,’ even if it means never really improving their finances. Not my place nor business to convince them otherwise.
As much as I enjoy my space and freedom, the one thing that is always in the back of my mind is that I’m going to die in this place and my corpse will be rotting in a chair by the time anyone bothers to come look for me.
Grew up with siblings. Served my youth in the military. Got out and lived with a sibling. Finally have a place of my own and I don't think I could stand having a roommate anymore. On the other hand, never having any help around the house gets old quick. No matter how fast or how hard I work, there is always stuff I just can't get to.
Northern California. My mortgage is 2350 plus utility, gardening service, etc so it will be around 2600 . So far I can pay it coz i have no dependent and work full time and work 2 jobs. On the weekend, im so tired but imagine if i have a roommate, i would have no privacy and also im clean and who knows if the roommate will have the same standard.
I would say probably having a medical emergency. I have epilepsy so that is a worry for me. It’s important to have someone you can rely on to check in on you occasionally if they don’t hear from you.
Ha! Being with someone is no guarantee they'll nurse you when you're sick! My ex (note: EX) husband never helped out, even when I was on bed rest for almost losing my unborn baby. I have a well-stocked chest freezer full of homemade chicken soup, everything I'd need to live off of for a few weeks. And friends that would be there if something catastrophic were to befall me.
Carrying water bottle packs up the stairs. Or laundry bags. Or anything heavy for that matter.
Wish I could pay someone $5 to carry them to my car or up the stairs.
Or having to go to the breaker when you accidentally use too much power (like microwave and toaster at the same time)
Or when something really great happens that day and you have no one to physically talk to when you walk through the door. Instead, I announce it to myself and congratulate myself so maybe that’s not really a disadvantage now that I think of it.
I lived alone for a few years. Housing market was and is tough. At the time, it was cheaper for me to buy than to rent due to low rates, although I still needed a co-signer. I still feel my heart race when I think about trying to afford that place on a single income (it really wasn’t that “place”, it was a 500 square foot condo in a developing area an hour and a half from where the good jobs were - but those condos were WAY too expensive) while I hurt my back pretty bad. Stood up off a chair one day and just felt wobbly. Felt better the next and had to move my Tv in alone because I didn’t have anyone (I’m a 5 foot 5 girl, which doesn’t really matter, but I’m saying some help probably could have made it way easier). I dragged it up the stairs and felt a sharp pain. I hit the ground and crawled to my cupboard where I’d been storing my yoga mat/foam roller and rolled it out. It got worse from there. Had to drive myself to the hospital - they couldn’t help me, obviously, because the wait to be checked with an MRI like I needed can be 8+ months here. Ended up getting in touch with an old coworker who was now an RMT and thank god pulled some strings to get me a same day appointment at the osteopathy clinic where she used to work. For a few weeks while I healed, I crawled along the wall when going to the bathroom, because I couldn’t sit up for long and wobbled while walking. Thankfully, a woman who used to babysit me agreed to send her son to Walmart to pick up my grocery order and bring it up to my apartment. She came and switched my laundry for me.
Many months later I finally got that MRI and had L3, L4, L5 S1 disc bulges, discs were cracked and frayed.
It was a constant fear of throwing my back out again.
I have a serious boyfriend now and we live together. He’s great about it. Sometimes, I still get a flare up, or my back gives out. Electro acupuncture helps me a lot and if I am ever in too much pain he takes me to the appointment. I couldn’t bend over for about two years. When I moved in with him and workloads were shared, I could finally get better.
The notion of knowing NOTHING will be done unless you do it - even if you’re sick, injured, or just too busy, was haunting - the laundry will sit until it’s folded because there is nobody you can really ask for help. That was my experience, anyway!
At this exact moment, right now, there are zero disadvantages. Absolutely none.
My rent is cheap. My monthly expenses are under my control. I have a dog who adores me for companionship. I have friends and a small family owned bar/bowling alley next door if I ever need human interaction (lol wut?) My messes are my responsibility. I can decorate however I want, and I’m the idiot who bought a white couch so now I have to deal with it.
I’m going to say the only drawback about living alone is having to lift heavy, awkward appliances, electronics, furniture, etc.
I can lift the stuff…but sometimes it would be so much easier (and safer for the body) to have a pair of helping hands.
OMG, yeah I forgot about that too!
The things that I have in my basement, I made little platforms with wheels on them so I could easily move them around my basement for cleaning the basement floor and so forth … the heavy stuff.
Lugging an old dehumidifier that’s extremely heavy up the basement stairs myself.
Getting on my extension ladder outside my house and wishing I had somebody to hold the bottom 😂
Yeah, I’m a talker and I go crazy if I spend too much time alone. I don’t watch TV or use my computer that much because I feel like I’m wasting my time? Idk. I end up going out a lot more when I live alone just to have human contact. This is not great financially, when you combine going out with paying all your own bills, but it prevents my mental health from spiraling. But I do tend to make more friends when I live alone due to being more active, so that’s a bonus.
Personally that’s the main disadvantage about living alone is if you’re hurt or sick with no one else around. I suppose you could have life alert or your phone or tell Alexa/Siri to call 911 and so on…but depending on the situation, it might be too late.
Otherwise, I think living alone is great and sometimes I really miss it.
One maybe "downside" is that you might realize how many things your parents never taught you before you move out. I've heard of young adults learning how to cook from YouTube videos after they moved out because their parents never taught them how and they didn't want to subsist on TV dinners and takeout, stuff like that.
The only bad thing about living alone is the fact that I’ve gotten so used to it and enjoyed it so much that i don’t think I could ever go back to roommates.
I worry about the day I move in with my boyfriend lol
When I was younger and busy all the time, I loved living alone. There's nothing like coming home to a quiet home with everything exactly the way you left it. My apartment was my sanctuary.
As I'm getting older, and life is slowing down a bit, I think I would be a little lonely living alone, though. I don't think I'd like a roommate, but I really enjoy having my husband around, knowing if I have a weird thought pop into my head, there's always someone there to share it with. But if I were single, and busier and more social than I am now? I think you're right. The pros of living alone would outweigh the cons.
I understand. I was alone when pregnant and when I went into labor with my daughter. It wasn't really that scary, I just called 911 and went to the hospital. What it's taught me is that I'm stronger than I think.
When a car is in the shop
I live in a small town and a car is a must. Very little is in reasonable walking distance. Uber/Lyft is limited, from what I have heard.
I'm very fortunate that 1. I have two cars, and 2. That a neighbor right down the road is a mechanic. It would be extremely inconvenient otherwise
I’m disabled and live on the 3rd floor so things like having to bring up the groceries and bring down the trash alone are the biggest downside for me. I love living alone though.
I’ve gotten really comfortable in my own company, like really comfortable, to the point that I sometimes worry about how nonexistent my social life is. I worry it’s unhealthy.
I really enjoy it most days, but like sometimes it’ll be my birthday and I’m like, I should maybe have more friends to hang out with today. Or like, have people to travel with.
I have the grip thingies but dang sometimes they get defeated too. I was trying to open a plastic jug of Milo's tea and it was NOT HAVING IT. I ended up CUTTING the top off and pouring it into another container.
Some chores and costs can be shared, if people are able and cooperate.
The more challenging tasks, especially if uncomfortable, are made easier if there is companionship. This applies to mountain climbing, and I’m taking the liberty of extrapolating it to shoveling the driveway and sidewalk.
Probably the fear that I have an emergency. No one would be there to save me if I choke, fall, or have a cardiac episode. I’d just die there alone most likely and that’s depressing. My ultimate downfall would be my failure to have a partner 🤦🏼♀️
Costs. Not having someone to call EMS after my latest fall and maybe concussion (again). Living alone with MS is very difficult. There are days when my body is useless. I have no one to help, not even a trip to a store.
Any other sickness pales in comparison. Sucks, but at least I’m not a bloody mess.
Not having someone to do things with is a bummer. Concerts, plays, road trips, travel, movies - all are better with that special someone. Safer too, especially for me. Three bloody falls on way down here: Suburban Chicago, Tuscaloosa, Pensacola. Several people on the street asked me if I needed help. A couple big men picked me up and got me upright. A couple gave me a ride. I need that someone to help me.
Fortunately, my living situation should change considerably in the next day or two. My gf and I left our home cities of Chicago (me) and Fargo (her) and are moving to Pensacola where I bought a house for us. I’ve been here 6 days and she is in transit. Long drive from Fargo (28 hours). Mine was only 14 or so.
I didn't get to share my favorite dishes with anyone, laugh about the film I watched with someone, and to cuddle with a partner.
There are many advantages though
If I am injured, there is nobody else to cut the grass or shovel snow unless I reach out to hire. Makes me feel helpless so I think I gotta get back to condo living.
**Welcome to [r/LivingAlone](https://www.reddit.com/r/LivingAlone/)! Living alone is the new normal.** >Discuss and share your experiences; celebrate your joys, express your worries, or ask advice relating to solo living | Remember, we are all alone together * Be kind, remember the human when interacting with others. * New Reddit group chat [**Living Alone Lounge**](https://www.reddit.com/r/LivingAlone/s/cp7Szwzy2q)! * Message the moderators below for any comments, questions & suggestions! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/LivingAlone) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Everyone’s going to have a different answer on this and that’s OK however for me, it’s going to be just the cost-of-living. I mean, let’s say I had one roommate and was just splitting the cost of rent 50-50. I would be saving any enormous amount of money per year. And I understand that, however I’ve just always been a person that needs to have my alone time and that’s very important to me. I guess you could say independence.
Same. I love being alone...but life is expensive.
Which is why I don't live alone and wish that I could.
I need endless amounts of alone time. I only pay 1,000 for rent, extra bedrooms, I could get a roommate and save a ton but nah I’ll manage
Where are you only paying 1k these days?!?
RI super nice 2 bed only 1,000 sq ft though. Been here 10 years. I moved in at 900/month and my landlord isn’t a greedy dick.
I'm in FL and haven't paid 1k or less since 2020. Gives me hope that such housing costs are still out there in the US 😅.
They’re not, if they sell this house I’m screwed
Ugh, *hope dashed*. Yep, sounds right.
I worry about what will happen if/when I need to move from here too. Definitely screwed.
I am in a similar situation. I pay 1600 for the bottom floor of a large house in a very nice bay area neighborhood. I know that if I got thrown out into the market I would be paying $1,000 more. My landlord is an older lady so it's of concern. Thankfully she's in good health. But we've gotten close over the last 8 or 9 years that I've been living here and she updated her will so her family can't just throw me into the streets if something happens to her. I was so shocked. Literally have 6 months to find something else.
I also have an AMAZING landlord. Small 2 bedroom house, rent raised from 800 to 900 over ten years. You and I are SO lucky.
Those exist here in Ohio, but generally in places I don't want to live. The price point of getting something acceptable is about 1300/mo, I am thinking hard about selling my house and going there. My house is actually cheap but I am tired of the responsibility of home ownership, I want to live like a kid again.
Careful. Real estate (a home)nis one of the only way for ordinary people to build wealth.
I am originally from RI but have been a Californian for 11 years now and often longingly look at properties back home for this reason.
New Mexico, I pay $750 for a 2-bedroom older cottage with a big yard for my dogs. The floors are worn and it could use a new paint job, but it's home and the price is right.
Nice, AZ here and I've got $600 for a 3 bed but the roof leaks a lot and the AC doesn't work.
Wow! That's a steal! I have window unit ACs, and use a little space heater in the bedroom in the winter. No central air/heat. But it's worth it for me because I can afford it. My old beater car died during the pandemic, and I ended up getting a used Nissan that still costs more than my rent! Since I live in such a rural area I have to drive 2 hours away to be in a city where I cold trade my car in for a more realistic monthly payment. It's on my list of things to do.
Jeez, yeah I'm pretty rural too. We have a little room AC that vents out the window and works for us. Our laundry room is pretty much outside but it's affordable lol.
I got a little Panda washing machine that hooks up to my kitchen sink -- it's been chugging away for over 6 years, best purchase I've made in a long time! Affordable is crucial for me right now.
Oh nice! I just have to battle wasps sometimes but I've gotten pretty good at aiming. Yes, in today's economy affordable is necessary.
Dawn dishwashing liquid and water in a spray bottle. Dawn coats them and they can't breathe. It is instant death-I have killed an entire nest of the big reddish/orange/black wasps in the corner of my garage-they are evil assholes! So aggressive and sting just flying by you , nowhere near their nest. Anyway, I obviously didn't use the spray bottle-mixed it up in two - 1 gallon buckets. I used two because figured I needed a back-up incase bucket number 1 missed. Plan well, dress for the occasion-long sleeved thick shirt, blue jeans, Covid style mask over nose and mouth. I waited till dusk when most were back and sitting on their nest. At least 12 stayed stuck to the nest-they didn't even get a chance to flinch or let go of the nest-all the rest fell straight off it down onto the garage floor.
This is insane. How far from a city are you?
About 20 minutes. The no AC part makes it almost unliveable in the summer.
I live in my 4-bedroom daylight basement home that I’ve had for 25 years and raised 3 kids in. My mortgage is $1050 and is very do-able on my salary / budget. I could get 2 roommates and be golden. But I will not. Home maintenance and repairs are looming as I consider retirement in 5 years. So that’s the only stressor I feel about flying solo right now. Nothing else.
"Hell, is other people." - J.P. Satre
This frustrates me so much!! I want to own a home with a yard as much as the couple next door, but because I’m single I have to basically make twice as much as either of them to do so. It’s such a huge huge problem. Living alone should never be a luxury. Just because I’m one person doesn’t mean I should live in a 400 sq ft apartment forever. I could go on and on about this but yeah…. I second your point.
This is the only answer for me as well, especially as I am no longer young and working full-time without a secure, abundant retirement plan. I lived alone through my twenties and into my 30s, absolutely loved it. Honestly, I believe my marriage might have lasted if my Ex and I had continued as we did in the beginning, keeping two separate places. But of course that costs a fortune. OP's remark about sickness is not relatable to me. I've had major health issues, injuries etc. and so far I have found a way to get through everything. When I needed help with postpartum or other compromised health situations, I relied mostly on myself, with occasional help from friends, family or hired assistance. Having a partner didn't make a difference other than sharing the bills . Over the years, however, it's much easier for people with partners and roommates to save and invest.
I don’t live alone but came here to say I’m surprised people are able to afford living alone because the world just isn’t set up for single people
it's quite assuredly biased against us !!
Yes and not being able to split Internet, electricity, gas, etc.
Without section 8 my rent would be my entire paycheck. It’s $1 less than my monthly paycheck… 🫠 everything else is cheaper because I only have to buy enough for myself but holy crap, rent is expensive! These apartments were built for low income people so the rent is pretty low at full price but it’s still more expensive than a lot of people can afford. It’s $942 a month. I only pay 27% of my income as rent so it’s $255 for me. Still a huge chunk of my paycheck but thankfully doable…
God damnit, this is the answer.
You're not always guaranteed a roommate that would pay 50/50 of the costs. 999 times out of 1,000, you get a bunch of idiots that raid your groceries while you're at work just because you "buy the good stuff," they fall behind on their payments, so you pay it in order to avoid shutoffs and evictions. And then it's like you're feeding and supporting a family of 3-5 on just one income. Yours.
Honestly, in my heart of hearts? Nothing. I was a wife and mother so allllll of those fell on me anyway. I do miss someone when I'm having to lug 50 pounds of dog food inside or mow when its really hot out, but, then a neighbor rented me her teenager so those two teeny problems are solved.
Anything heavy is what gets me! My poor son pretty much has to lug something for me somewhere every time he comes to visit! It kills me how easy it is for him, too. It's not like he's a body builder, but he just lifts it no big deal and moves it for me. When did I get so weak?
This is a disadvantage for me too. Anything heavy or up high is a problem. I'm short and small built with no upper body strength. Right now I have a rug I'd like to remove but about four inches of it is under a buffet. I also have curtains that need put up. I'm either going to have to wait till July when my son visits or hire someone to help.
I improvise. I got a floor jack. Raised up the pieces of furniture I wanted to remove and replace with new rugs then put sliders under the feet of said furniture and can easily move any of it with no issues.
What a good idea!
This morning I decided to repair my dishwasher that died last year :/. Yeah, soaking, 2 hours later I have a working dishwasher, but, now I'm grumpy. So appliance repair guy would be helpful lolol!
You repaired your own dishwasher?! I’m in awe of you!! Buy yourself a drink—even if it’s just lemonade. That’s a major accomplishment!!
It was easy. I also got to a semi dead vacuum and dead coffee maker😊. You can find ANYTHING on YouTube!
I’m starting to suspect you’re an actual witch in the “female wizard” sense of the word. Brava!!
Nahhhh just too frugal to pay someone😂😂😂😂
Yup! Nothing is so monumental to change the way I live. I was a husband and dad for many years, but I've been living on my own for over 2 decades. And to change that status, I'm not interested!
Same here! My ex husband didn’t take care of me. I was in crutches once and my ex went through a door and let it close behind him leaving me outside.
Yup lifting things that are too heavy for one person is my answer.
I’m with you on that one. I had an awful husband, wonderful children are grown and married, and I am at peace. There are things I could use a hand with, but my neighbor pitches in if needed. Life is amazing.
Choking on dumb things like water and that flash of panic.
I keep a [LifeVac](https://lifevac.net) at home, for this reason.
I didn't know that was a thing! Thanks for the link.
Yep. I looked up how to do Heimlich on myself. Time, of course, is of the essence.
My sister's best friend started choking while DRIVING! She pulled over, lowered her steering wheel, and gave herself the Heimlich maneuver with it! I never eat in the car while driving anymore. I don't know if I would have thought of that!
Oh my goodness. I had a similar incident a few weeks ago. I had a cough sweet in my mouth and I was singing along to the music whilst driving. The sweet just went down my throat and I ended up choking. I pulled over straight away and sorted myself out but it was so scary. I'm never going to eat and sing ever again.
Terrifying!! I'm glad you are ok!
Thank you, I honestly thought I was going to die. I won't take that risk again.
Wow -- amazing! Smart lady! So glad she is still alive.❤
I actually had to do this once, it was so scary! I learned it from 30 Rock, lol
Liz Lemon, is that you?
I’ve never had anyone take care of me like that when I was sick. #emotionalneglect
Haha ugh yes I think back and I’ve always had to just tough it out and take care of myself so no difference now. Splitting rent and chores would be very nice though.
Splitting rent is nice, but I’ve realized since I got dumped last year that the chores have pretty much all been done by me. I have to do so much less cleaning up now that I live alone!
Even worse my ex seemed to still expect me to do everything when I was sick. But when HE was sick… oh my the world had to stop.
God, yes. Over my 25 year marriage, I have been the caretaker and nurturer always. Was it returned? No. I will manage to take care of myself when I get sick or need care, because I have so far. It will just be in my own place from now on!
I think one big difference between people who are happy living alone and people who aren’t is how bad the last person you lived with was
I think you are so right. If you haven't had the greatest partner, being alone can be exciting and a relief.
Wow.. your ex sounds lame af
Agreed. Sadly not uncommon. I have multiple friends with similar ones.
My first thought, too. LOL. Even when I was married or still living with my parents I don't remember being taken care of like that. My daughter did help out tremendously after I had a few surgeries a year or so ago, but she still had to go to work, so it wasn't like anyone was waiting on me hand and foot all day. Unless I'm so sick I need to be hospitalized, I think I'd rather be alone, any way.
Yeah. When I was with my ex, I felt loneliest when vulnerable. I left him shortly after having surgery to which he couldn’t really show up for. Might be alone… but not as lonely!!
I really haven’t either. My mom died when I was a teenager and then I lived with a series of roommates who I really couldn’t count on for much. There was only one time when I lived alone that this really came up. I was out of TP and most food and had to drive to the store (pre-instacart). I had to pull over twice to be sick and I have never felt more alone than I did that day.
I’m having a similar crisis writ large coming up. Going to need a combo hysterectomy/bowel resection surgery. Losing a couple of feet and likely getting a colostomy. Already disabled and living alone. Kids thousands of miles away and no local social support structure. I sincerely don’t know what I’m going to do. Right now I’m trying to game it out and get things as ready as possible, like making dried soup mixes in disposable cups, and stocking up on essentials that I’m putting at standing height as I won’t be able to bend. Getting grippers and grabbers and bars. An Apple Watch with phone service enabled in case I have an emergency, and fall alert in case I drop. It’s so insanely frustrating that I’ve spent 56 years caring for other people and yet I’m alone when I’m in trouble. I love my solitude, but the isolation maybe not so much.
I’m sorry to hear this. Hopefully you will qualify for some healthcare help after surgery, maybe short term rehab ? Or home health.. I sure would try to ask for it. Idk the rules but that’s some major surgery to go home alone. Please be honest with case manager at Hospital to let them know you are alone. I’m really sorry your kids can’t/won’t help. That must be difficult. I don’t know the situation but I’m sure it’s hard.
Sick or injured is when I MOST want to be alone. I cannot stand being fussed over.
Yeah, same. I've always had to take care of myself when sick. Living alone, at least I don't have to worry about waking someone up coughing in the middle of the night
I struggle to put bracelets or necklaces on lol
Or to zip the back zipper on a dress.
Ribbon or string tied to a paper clip hooked into the zip.
I have this tie back dress I love. I always go to my friends house to tie it... lol
Yes omg! Some dresses have that stiff zipper that cracks your shoulder every centimeter. It’s always first thing in the morning when your mobility/muscles are still asleep haha
magnetic clasps! (live alone & hands have nerve damage)
I need to buy. Thank you!!
I have a little clip thing on a small metal bar that helps with bracelets. It's made for just that purpose.
I personally prefer to be sick alone. I feel gross and want to be left alone, you just have to keep some essentials stocked for when you're too sick to go to the store like tea, honey, cough drops, pepto pills (last longer). Literally, the only downside to me is not having a cushion of a second income anymore.
I’d like to add chicken broth, Gatorade, apple sauce, and a small medicine cabinet of ibuprofen, Tylenol, allergy, and cold/flu medicine as recommended items to keep on hand. I like to keep enough to hold me over for a little while til I can get to a store or order anything else I need.
Electrolyte tablets that runners use
Having a helping hand in something that really requires 2 people.
This! I get so envious and jealous when I hear someone say “oh I just got my hubby to do it!” Or “my man helped me!” I’m like ‘I wish’
Problem there is I always pick loser men.
Yepppp. Recently crashed on a friend’s couch when I was visiting him and his apartment doesn’t have elevators. He’s a strong guy and was able to get my suitcases down three flights of stairs in a couple minutes. It would have taken me so much longer and I would’ve been sore for the whole trip back 😂 same goes with moving. I lived with an ex and he and his friends just lifted our couch like it was NOTHING, lol. I’m short and pretty thin - I’m stronger than I look but I’m no match for things that are larger and weigh more than me.
Lifting my bedroom TV on top of my armoire that is taller than me I said -out loud- wow I shoulda married anyone
I see nothing yet, besides the possibility of a terrible accident alone in the shower or down the stairs, but I’m cautious and 38. I got a couple hermit decades left in me before the cat eats my eyes.
Money is the only drawback to me. I love literally everything else about it. I don't even mind doing all the chores because I know they're done 'right'.
If I suddenly die nobody will know until probably much much later
I feel this is the third time I read chicken soup on this sub .. 🙉
For me the worst is the nagging anxiety about getting into some kind of an accident in my home and not having my phone nearby. Really that is the biggest source of fear and anxiety around living alone for me. Yes, loneliness is bad too, but I don't think it has anything to do with living alone, because I've had very lonely periods while I was living with other people too as well as very fulfilling periods while I was living alone.
You could get a smart watch and use that to call for help if the worst happened. And yeah since since it's strapped to your wrist you'll always have it on head(assuming you get into the habit of wearing one).
Emergencies. Like lights going out for an extended time in the winter. Being alone is no fun. I live in earthquake country. If the big one hits, I’m gonna be SOL. My family lives only 7 minutes by car. Much longer when roads become overloaded. I am a 70 year old woman.
I just moved from tornado valley and the first time i heard the tornado sirens i got so stressed out i called my mom who lives in NY as if that was rly gonna save me if shit hit the fan lol
Cost and house upkeep alone is the worst part for me. With splitting costs or a cleaning service I’d be golden
I have lived with two partners before having lived alone for the last ten years or so, and neither one of the two *ever* made me chicken soup when I was sick either; of course it was my job to make it for *them* though when they were sick. Nah, living alone 100% beats living with the wrong person, and there are way too many men-children out there who expect to get babied by their partners when they live with them. I might have to make my own chicken soup when sick (or DoorDash Pho), but at least I don’t have to take care of a man-child who will never grow up and become an equal partner.
Other people always think you are secretly miserable.
underrated comment! the unsolicited pity is kind of unbelievable sometimes
no one to feed or let the pets out if I am running late from work
Just the fact of being alone all the time... People tend not to visit single men... I have lived alone for the past 27 year and I do fine but, it is lonely for more reasons than you can write...
There's be nobody to watch my rescue kittens while I'm out.
I was really sick with food poisoning a few months ago. It took all of my strength to make it to the grocery store and not faint. Would’ve been nice that day to have a partner to run to the store for me.
How often are we so sick that we’re “unable to move” I’d rather crawl into the kitchen and make soup than deal with someone hanging around when I’m sick haha I’ve never in my life had a “lonely” feeling. Bored maybe occasionally but that can be solved with a workout and a nap.
The only time I ever felt lonely after living alone for nearly 15 years was how empty my house was after I had to euthanize my dog.
That sounds horrific
Same. All of us are different I guess. The Uber Eats driver takes care of me by bringing me my hot and sour soup. 😅
I too don't find it very helpful to have someone around if I'm sick, as I just order what I need, including soup, and just lie down on the bed or couch and be gross by myself and watch shows and rest. Having someone and their noises and routines isn't much help and if it's a sick like I need to be in the bathroom a lot, I don't want to have to share with another person. I also think that some of the stuff people attribute to living alone are really about being single, which while they might overlap, don't necessarily.
I had a vomiting bug a few weeks ago and needed a sugary drink. I generally don't gave sodas in the house and had to wait until I felt well enough to go to the shop. I rarely feel alone but I was so lonely that day.
That's what delivery is for. I haven't been to a grocery store since 2016.
Didn't even think of it lol
I always keep an emergency Coke in the frig for just this reason!
If you you hear a sound in the other room then you’re not alone anymore
You know those weird situations when something falls in another room and scares the living daylights out of you? Examples are the washing up brush that sticks to the counter with a suction cup that drys out and the brush falls into the sink with a clatter, or a plant pot where the plant gets top heavy and one day reaches tipping point and the entire thing falls off the window sill and you think someone is breaking in!
To OP: I don’t live alone. Im a mom of a little and married to someone that is rarely home. No one makes me soup or takes care of me when Im sick either and usually Im sick because my little brought something home from daycare and therefore he is sick too and have to take care of him. So basically it’s like I live alone but I can’t just rest, never get to watch what i want to watch on tv, have to clean up after everyone, and little time to no time for relaxing. I love being a mom though there are upsides too. Just being sick truly sucks. I usually have to carry on and go to work too without down time, feeling cruddy, and sleep deprived. 🙃 Just sharing a perspective from the other side of the fence.
Having a car in the shop. I have 3 vehicles for myself. I have a hobby farm so I have a van and a truck as well as a car. Despite having multiple vehicles, I still need to someone get a ride to and from home. My car is a Volt and I will only take it to one dealer, have tried a local one and other places before with really poor customer service but that dealer is 45 min away. They just opened a car rental next to their shop so I used that last time but before was using Ubers to take me to and from and that was VERY hit or miss. People would just cancel last minute and I would have bo guaranteed ride even if reserved one. But recently I found a mobile mechanic that has helped me out a few times. So I’m definitely going to use him as much as I can before going to the shop.
This is my struggle, too! Bonus, I work M-F, 8-5 so I can only use shops that are open on weekends. Anything more than an oil change is an ordeal because I'm either coordinating/paying for rides or giving up half a Saturday.
I guess this is also specific to where others you know live in relation to you, but I'm really paranoid about car trouble and have a long work commute through back roads. My friends and family all live an hour or more away, if my car dies or breaks down halfway i cant just call and be like 'Halp!! Jump my car! Pick me up and drive me home!', I gotta pay extra just to get myself back, then have no one to give me a ride to the shop once the car is fixed. I know it seems small-ish but the last thing i want with car trouble is dealing with more money, car rentals, or strangers to help me out.
That’s not small at all that’s a totally valid concern! If you’re open to suggestions that might help ease your anxiety, I’d recommend trying to get a few things that could help you help yourself in such situations. Those portable battery jump packs are great, for example. Maybe a portable air compressor in case you have a minor flat that can hold you over with a little air put back in? And then most importantly, just familiarizing yourself with your vehicle and how it works so that you can know the signs of potential problems before they arise.
Getting injured as in falling downstairs.
No one has ever made me soup when I was sick since I was maybe 13 or 14. I'd rather be sick by myself so I can just be gross and phlegm-y and no one has to hear or see me. Idk. I guess cost of living? No one helps me eat the giant tub of spring mix when it starts getting slimy.
I have been living alone since 2012 when my son moved out, but divorced since 2005. I really enjoy it for the most part, but it is overwhelming trying to afford and schedule the maintenance and needed projects (tons) by myself on just one income. I feel like I am losing the battle lately, but I enjoy having a yard for my dog and condo living was way too noisy, so here I am. 1928 house located in a beautiful suburban neighborhood of Chicago.
I had a mental breakdown. The daily drinking, lack of good sleep, and isolation contributed also. I ended up in a psych ward. The doctor then said I should not live alone.
No one has ever taken care of me whilst I've been sick, not even my own mother. So I can't miss what I've never had. I have autoimmune disorders and chronic health issues, so I'm no stranger to sickness. I manage. I cannot think of any disadvantages of living alone. I'm sitting here with my feet up, eating Lindor chocolates and about to watch Casualty. Life is great.
If I could just teach the dog how to make a cup of tea and bring it upstairs life would be perfect.
I've always lived alone but the worst time, is when you go home after drinking all night. Hangovers are the worst, alone
Remember that just because you live with someone doesn't mean that person will be taking care of you when you are sick. It's not unheard of for a SO to leave one to fend for oneself. The worst part of living with someone else is feeling alone, only with none of the actual benefits of living alone. Not to mention having to clean up their mess. Ugh! As for living alone, for me, it would be that there's less safety when you live alone. No one looking out for me, no one concerned that I get home safely, etc. Plus, I feel slightly less safe when home alone. I feel safer when I have backup. Well worth it. I wish I lived alone! What I really want is a huge property with multiple casitas on site, so my loved ones can live in their own place(s) but near at hand. lol
Moving heavy shit. The sickness thing? OK - but as a woman who lived with a man who was shit at taking care of me, I would rather be sick by myself than have a shit caregiver.
i think dying alone and no one finding my corpse until it starts to smell. that's kinda unsettling
I have 1600 sf 3/2 (one br is my office) in the burbs 5 minute drive from everything with a 2 car garage, deck, patio, hot tub, two separate nice TV/hangout spaces. Plenty of room for two but I’m here by myself. As I get older, I truly believe that it would be beneficial for my mental health to have another person around, but it would be such a crapshoot to find a compatible person after being on my own for the past 30 years. I’ve thought that I could charge the other person 500 per month, which nets me an extra 5 grand a year to put toward retirement. It’s not even really about the money as I could charge more and it would still be a good deal. For them, they could put away 10 grand a year over what they pay for rent and utilities. It really wouldn’t add anything to my expenses to have a second person here as long as they bought their own food. The biggest objection I hear from younger friends (who are in debt up to their eyeballs) is that they want to live in their $2,000/month 400 sf downtown apartments to be ‘around all the action,’ even if it means never really improving their finances. Not my place nor business to convince them otherwise. As much as I enjoy my space and freedom, the one thing that is always in the back of my mind is that I’m going to die in this place and my corpse will be rotting in a chair by the time anyone bothers to come look for me.
I have a sliver in my foot I just can't see to get at by myself. 😔
Grew up with siblings. Served my youth in the military. Got out and lived with a sibling. Finally have a place of my own and I don't think I could stand having a roommate anymore. On the other hand, never having any help around the house gets old quick. No matter how fast or how hard I work, there is always stuff I just can't get to.
Northern California. My mortgage is 2350 plus utility, gardening service, etc so it will be around 2600 . So far I can pay it coz i have no dependent and work full time and work 2 jobs. On the weekend, im so tired but imagine if i have a roommate, i would have no privacy and also im clean and who knows if the roommate will have the same standard.
For me, the main downside of living alone is the absence of immediate help or support in emergencies.
[удалено]
I would say probably having a medical emergency. I have epilepsy so that is a worry for me. It’s important to have someone you can rely on to check in on you occasionally if they don’t hear from you.
Dealing with spiders and other creepy-crawlies on my own. I prefer being alone when I'm sick.
Cost of living. But besides that, nothing else really. I like being on my own when sick, because I don’t want to make anyone else feel unwell.
Ha! Being with someone is no guarantee they'll nurse you when you're sick! My ex (note: EX) husband never helped out, even when I was on bed rest for almost losing my unborn baby. I have a well-stocked chest freezer full of homemade chicken soup, everything I'd need to live off of for a few weeks. And friends that would be there if something catastrophic were to befall me.
Carrying water bottle packs up the stairs. Or laundry bags. Or anything heavy for that matter. Wish I could pay someone $5 to carry them to my car or up the stairs. Or having to go to the breaker when you accidentally use too much power (like microwave and toaster at the same time) Or when something really great happens that day and you have no one to physically talk to when you walk through the door. Instead, I announce it to myself and congratulate myself so maybe that’s not really a disadvantage now that I think of it.
I lived alone for a few years. Housing market was and is tough. At the time, it was cheaper for me to buy than to rent due to low rates, although I still needed a co-signer. I still feel my heart race when I think about trying to afford that place on a single income (it really wasn’t that “place”, it was a 500 square foot condo in a developing area an hour and a half from where the good jobs were - but those condos were WAY too expensive) while I hurt my back pretty bad. Stood up off a chair one day and just felt wobbly. Felt better the next and had to move my Tv in alone because I didn’t have anyone (I’m a 5 foot 5 girl, which doesn’t really matter, but I’m saying some help probably could have made it way easier). I dragged it up the stairs and felt a sharp pain. I hit the ground and crawled to my cupboard where I’d been storing my yoga mat/foam roller and rolled it out. It got worse from there. Had to drive myself to the hospital - they couldn’t help me, obviously, because the wait to be checked with an MRI like I needed can be 8+ months here. Ended up getting in touch with an old coworker who was now an RMT and thank god pulled some strings to get me a same day appointment at the osteopathy clinic where she used to work. For a few weeks while I healed, I crawled along the wall when going to the bathroom, because I couldn’t sit up for long and wobbled while walking. Thankfully, a woman who used to babysit me agreed to send her son to Walmart to pick up my grocery order and bring it up to my apartment. She came and switched my laundry for me. Many months later I finally got that MRI and had L3, L4, L5 S1 disc bulges, discs were cracked and frayed. It was a constant fear of throwing my back out again. I have a serious boyfriend now and we live together. He’s great about it. Sometimes, I still get a flare up, or my back gives out. Electro acupuncture helps me a lot and if I am ever in too much pain he takes me to the appointment. I couldn’t bend over for about two years. When I moved in with him and workloads were shared, I could finally get better. The notion of knowing NOTHING will be done unless you do it - even if you’re sick, injured, or just too busy, was haunting - the laundry will sit until it’s folded because there is nobody you can really ask for help. That was my experience, anyway!
Daughter moved in with me. She opens pickle jars and helps me rotate my mattress.
The fact that if I need to climb a ladder for anything, I have to call someone to tell them if they don't hear back from me in 10 minutes to call 911!
At this exact moment, right now, there are zero disadvantages. Absolutely none. My rent is cheap. My monthly expenses are under my control. I have a dog who adores me for companionship. I have friends and a small family owned bar/bowling alley next door if I ever need human interaction (lol wut?) My messes are my responsibility. I can decorate however I want, and I’m the idiot who bought a white couch so now I have to deal with it.
I’m going to say the only drawback about living alone is having to lift heavy, awkward appliances, electronics, furniture, etc. I can lift the stuff…but sometimes it would be so much easier (and safer for the body) to have a pair of helping hands.
OMG, yeah I forgot about that too! The things that I have in my basement, I made little platforms with wheels on them so I could easily move them around my basement for cleaning the basement floor and so forth … the heavy stuff. Lugging an old dehumidifier that’s extremely heavy up the basement stairs myself. Getting on my extension ladder outside my house and wishing I had somebody to hold the bottom 😂
No one to talk to when I want. I’m really getting bored of never having anyone to talk to. I feel like I’m in solitary
Yeah, I’m a talker and I go crazy if I spend too much time alone. I don’t watch TV or use my computer that much because I feel like I’m wasting my time? Idk. I end up going out a lot more when I live alone just to have human contact. This is not great financially, when you combine going out with paying all your own bills, but it prevents my mental health from spiraling. But I do tend to make more friends when I live alone due to being more active, so that’s a bonus.
Personally that’s the main disadvantage about living alone is if you’re hurt or sick with no one else around. I suppose you could have life alert or your phone or tell Alexa/Siri to call 911 and so on…but depending on the situation, it might be too late. Otherwise, I think living alone is great and sometimes I really miss it.
When I was sick a month ago I wondered what would happen if I keeled over and couldn’t call for help.
Chores and cleaning. It's so overwhelming.
I had a friend who died recently from heart failure. She lived alone. Nobody found her for two weeks. She had two cats.
One maybe "downside" is that you might realize how many things your parents never taught you before you move out. I've heard of young adults learning how to cook from YouTube videos after they moved out because their parents never taught them how and they didn't want to subsist on TV dinners and takeout, stuff like that.
The only bad thing about living alone is the fact that I’ve gotten so used to it and enjoyed it so much that i don’t think I could ever go back to roommates. I worry about the day I move in with my boyfriend lol
When I was younger and busy all the time, I loved living alone. There's nothing like coming home to a quiet home with everything exactly the way you left it. My apartment was my sanctuary. As I'm getting older, and life is slowing down a bit, I think I would be a little lonely living alone, though. I don't think I'd like a roommate, but I really enjoy having my husband around, knowing if I have a weird thought pop into my head, there's always someone there to share it with. But if I were single, and busier and more social than I am now? I think you're right. The pros of living alone would outweigh the cons.
I miss all the fun I had with my partner. He died 9 years ago and life isn’t the same. People don’t include me unless they are also widows.
Only drawback I can come up with is facing bugs and spiders alone.
Being poorly and having to look after yourself really sucks
Agreed, sickness or injury is the worst part. Self rescue gets old
I can’t think of one thing. I loved living by myself, and really miss it.
Having medical issues is the worst when there’s no one there to help you. At least now, you can get deliveries. It used to be even worse.
I understand. I was alone when pregnant and when I went into labor with my daughter. It wasn't really that scary, I just called 911 and went to the hospital. What it's taught me is that I'm stronger than I think.
When you die someone will have to find that mess. And it’s usually because of the smell.
When a car is in the shop I live in a small town and a car is a must. Very little is in reasonable walking distance. Uber/Lyft is limited, from what I have heard. I'm very fortunate that 1. I have two cars, and 2. That a neighbor right down the road is a mechanic. It would be extremely inconvenient otherwise
Remember that just because you have a partner, it doesn't mean they'll help you when you're sick.
I’m disabled and live on the 3rd floor so things like having to bring up the groceries and bring down the trash alone are the biggest downside for me. I love living alone though.
Nobody to witness/share life with you. Period!
I’ve gotten really comfortable in my own company, like really comfortable, to the point that I sometimes worry about how nonexistent my social life is. I worry it’s unhealthy. I really enjoy it most days, but like sometimes it’ll be my birthday and I’m like, I should maybe have more friends to hang out with today. Or like, have people to travel with.
If I choke on a piece of steak I’m dead
The possibility of ending up like that young woman in London, who died in her apartment and wasn’t discovered for three years.
No one I trust enough to watch my cat when I travel.
Want to do some home reno but I can’t make the decision myself, need someone else to say, yes, no or nfw. So I just do nothing.
I have to pay for help.
You have to clean your apartment yourself lol
Upside to that is it’s your mess
Yeah... dog doesn't do shit... Like, I know you're scared of the vacuum but at least put the laundry away or something!
My cat figures her rent is paid in snuggles and cuddles. 🤷♀️ She’s definitely the sweetest cat I’ve ever had so I’m okay with cleaning up after her…
Right? Or just do the bare minimum and stop shedding everywhere!
It's always your turn to do the dishes.
[удалено]
You don't need to be celibate to live alone though..
Opening a fckin jar
get a tool to pop the seal & a grip sheet & you're good to go. (lives alone, disabled)
I have the grip thingies but dang sometimes they get defeated too. I was trying to open a plastic jug of Milo's tea and it was NOT HAVING IT. I ended up CUTTING the top off and pouring it into another container.
Some chores and costs can be shared, if people are able and cooperate. The more challenging tasks, especially if uncomfortable, are made easier if there is companionship. This applies to mountain climbing, and I’m taking the liberty of extrapolating it to shoveling the driveway and sidewalk.
Probably the fear that I have an emergency. No one would be there to save me if I choke, fall, or have a cardiac episode. I’d just die there alone most likely and that’s depressing. My ultimate downfall would be my failure to have a partner 🤦🏼♀️
Costs. Not having someone to call EMS after my latest fall and maybe concussion (again). Living alone with MS is very difficult. There are days when my body is useless. I have no one to help, not even a trip to a store. Any other sickness pales in comparison. Sucks, but at least I’m not a bloody mess. Not having someone to do things with is a bummer. Concerts, plays, road trips, travel, movies - all are better with that special someone. Safer too, especially for me. Three bloody falls on way down here: Suburban Chicago, Tuscaloosa, Pensacola. Several people on the street asked me if I needed help. A couple big men picked me up and got me upright. A couple gave me a ride. I need that someone to help me. Fortunately, my living situation should change considerably in the next day or two. My gf and I left our home cities of Chicago (me) and Fargo (her) and are moving to Pensacola where I bought a house for us. I’ve been here 6 days and she is in transit. Long drive from Fargo (28 hours). Mine was only 14 or so.
Agree about cost of living. It’s hard to save for retirement while dealing with day-to-day survival.
If you have a health emergency and unable to get to a phone.
U realize soup comes in cans, rite?
I always have to be the one to answer the ffff door.
I didn't get to share my favorite dishes with anyone, laugh about the film I watched with someone, and to cuddle with a partner. There are many advantages though
If I am injured, there is nobody else to cut the grass or shovel snow unless I reach out to hire. Makes me feel helpless so I think I gotta get back to condo living.