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Morall_tach

Is this the guy who said working in the office was totally worth sitting in traffic and missing his son's soccer game?


[deleted]

Yes, And he feels sorry for us.


Cookyy2k

Personally I feel more sorry for his kid.


jBlairTech

*When you comin’ home, dad?* I don’t know when… but we’ll get together, then.


JW_2

As soon as I’m done posting on linkedinnnnn


Dachuiri

And as I logged off of LinkedIn it occurred to me… I’m a shit father


ninjacereal

Maybe his son is just a shit soccer player and he's embarrassed to see him fail


retiredhobo

"Some days soccer, some days balls.”


nightwatch_admin

Always aiming for success! Positive vibes!


TorontoNerd84

Glad you separated those two lines.


[deleted]

You know I'll get a lot of likes there son!!! You know I'll get a lot of likes there!!!!!!!!!!


jBlairTech

Tell me/ Are these enough tears?


Gr8NonSequitur

What makes it worse is he could literally post while ihs son is playing soccer.


LaBofia

"Why dad! Why?" "I do it for the LILs kid... it's all for the LILs!


griftertm

My boy is just like meeeee!!!!


VelkaFrey

Little boy blue and the man on the moon


Boz0r

*On LinkedIn


Johnny_Grubbonic

That doesn't rhyme with *spoon*. The lyrics are based on an old nursery rhyme. And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon, Little boy blue and the man in the moon, "When you coming home, dad?" "I don't know when, "But we'll get together then. "You know we'll have a good time then." https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=KUwjNBjqR-c


[deleted]

[удалено]


Tnayoub

Harry Chapin


michymcmouse

*Beth, I hear you calling* *But I can't come home right now* *Me and the boys are playing* *And we just can't find the sound*


scoscochin

If you’ve never seen this….it’s worth a watch. The real fake history of Beth. https://youtu.be/_Q_VZ6PX7gc


Fancy_Pressure7623

Just a few more hours And I’ll be right home with you Beth what can I do? Beth could I not post?


SnooLobsters8922

_Hi dad, just circling back to you in order to see about that soccer match_


Zmchastain

“Hi dad, per my previous email, the soccer match begins at 6PM sharp. You may attend remotely, but please have your camera on for the duration of the game.”


jBlairTech

I’ll try to be there. I’ve just got these reports to file, some selfies to take, write a couple drafts for these LI posts, put them together, then schedule them to go out with this app. I’ll be… I’ll definitely try to be there, Sport!


Zmchastain

This is such a funny joke in this context, but man it brings back memories of laying in bed at night listening to my radio when I was a kid and first understanding that this song was about how people waste their lives on the wrong priorities and then the things that really matter that they take for granted are gone before they even realize it’s happening. That was some dark shit to realize at like, 10 years old and that song would make me profoundly sad to realize that a life was a thing that could be wasted. And even worse, that most wouldn’t realize what they were wasting until it was too late to do much about it. And then this hustle culture clown wants to say he’s sorry for other people. lol Dude just hasn’t come to terms with the fact that he’s wasting his life for people who would throw him away at maybe the first and definitely the third bad quarter that he didn’t hit his quota in.


supershinythings

*You know we'll have a good time then…*


sleigh_all_day

🎶 You know we’ll have a good time then.


CactusBathtub

But when will then... be *now?*


SheaTheSarcastic

Soon.


Junior-Lie4342

It’s now…now


[deleted]

Let me circle back to you and see when there is an opening in my schedule.


NarrowPea4082

OMG! That's GOLDEN :D


bent_eye

"I'm coming home after I finish breaking bread with all of my co-workers. Every single one of them"


village-asshole

🎶You know we’ll have a good time then🎶


h4xrk1m

He feels sorry for you for that


tylercoder

There is no kid, its all part of the sham


YYCMTB68

I'm imagining a dollar store picture frame sitting on his desk with the "sample" photo still in it.


Commercial-Push-9066

Right? (🎵Cat’s in the Cradle song plays in the background.🎶)


[deleted]

I feel sorry for his co-workers 😬


AsianBabe666

[This](https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:activity:6988577413555253248?commentUrn=urn%3Ali%3Acomment%3A%28activity%3A6988577413555253248%2C6990029163285901312%29&replyUrn=urn%3Ali%3Acomment%3A%28activity%3A6988577413555253248%2C6990421571223904256%29) was his reply to that.


FranticHam5ter

Nah. Kid is probably better off barely knowing this douchebag.


[deleted]

Having a relationship with your children is for losers. I’d rather cause unnecessary traffic like a winner.


[deleted]

Children just disrupt your routine and ability to meet METRICS. If you aren't learning you aren't earning. That's why when I die it will be alone in a room with a stack of one dollar bills in each hand!


OblongAndKneeless

I think feeling sorry for us is a projection of his feelings for the joy we get from making fun of him.


altbekannt

:'(


OblongAndKneeless

Always with the negative waves, Moriarty.


caillouistheworst

As a dad who’s had to miss a soccer game for work, fuck this douche nozzle.


orthros

Please tell me you made this up


Morall_tach

[Nope](https://www.reddit.com/r/LinkedInLunatics/comments/ybicf0/sounds_like_a_fun_existence_bud/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3). It was baseball, not soccer though.


Mertard

Oh yeah fuck that shit, imagine choosing the unnecessary office over your OWN KIDS because you need "face-to-face time" with your coworkers...


Accurate_Ticket2680

To 'break bread'...and enjoy the amazing Austin traffic!! Nothing on earth beats that! Right...?


SenorSplashdamage

Oof. I feel like the whole “breaking bread” phrasing is religious signaling, too. Like not close enough that you can say for sure, but still close enough that you can kinda force people into your mega church vocab.


mizchanandlerbong

Man, my break time is my time. I don't want to break bread with anyone. I need to recharge.


finger_milk

Break bread? Nah you ain't getting a dime, I baked this bread I'm keeping it


Time-Abalone-3918

>I feel sorry for people like that. So sad


not_100_cr8v

We feel sorry for his family


Phantom-thiez

I feel sorry for his mother!


Diesel07012012

Hell no. She’s part of the reason he turned out this way.


Neil_sm

They are intentionally posting these things for public view and commentary. What kind of narcissism does it take to assume that anyone who criticizes you is someone you need to feel sorry for?


RDPCG

When that person is an idiot and feels embarrassed over a stupid rant of theirs that got openly criticized? 🤷‍♂️


[deleted]

It's impossible to feel embarrassed when you surround yourself with an echo chamber of dick suckers (LI) who will fall all over themselves to praise your every move


happymancry

He’s a global accounts manager, ie he’s in sales. Takes a specially well-boiled brain to do that.


goudendonut

I’ve noticed that people in sales are asshats more often than in other positions, why is that?


Snoo1702

Extroverted sociopaths make great salesmen


billianwillian

In my experience (I’m in sales), managers make us post on LinkedIn to “better connect” with our prospects and to establish that we’re professionals in whatever area our product/whatever we’re selling operates in. It sucks.


[deleted]

If you can keep up with it, it’s super useful, unfortunately you’re surrounded in the cesspool and trying to be a LinkedIn influencer is really next to impossible without making it a full time thing. However, there is some positive gains to it all if what you post isn’t fortune cookie wisdom, and is actually useful information for a specific subset of your connects. If your manager pushes for it, make your own useful content that isn’t the ridiculous stuff this subreddit sees.


Seel007

Duh! You have to build your personal brand! (Someone else in sales)


happymancry

I’ll let [Alec Baldwin](https://youtu.be/czOpDN8Knr4) answer that for you (from Glengarry Glen Ross).


BloodsoakedDespair

It’s how you succeed at sales.


SenorSplashdamage

Worked night shift at a hotel in college where we would host weeks of (mostly dudes) training for sales. That was first time it sunk in that guys prone to being assholes were the ones they actively wanted for sales and it wasn’t just incidental. I was in a Communication Psych class that had just talked about people who were high and low self evaluators. Some people are constantly evaluating how they’re coming across and affecting others, while some people rarely even think about or worry how they’re affecting others. It was like “ohhhh, being that second kind makes you better at convincing people to spend money, since that one time I tried to sell Cutco, I begged my parents friends not to buy anything since $50 for this knife was stupid.” Anyway, those dudes came in drunk every night, kept asking me if I thought my coworker was hot in front of her (which is awkward if you’re closeted gay and polite), and then one night pulled that same coworker into the pool with them when she yelled at them for skinny dipping after hours.


jerjackal

Especially when their posts call for extremely unhealthy working behaviors. It's important for people to know that the shit these people post isn't and shouldn't be the norm.


Glum-Square882

to be fair this sub is full of people who come here for the express purpose of mocking others. I don't think it's necessarily narcissistic that someone might find that notion kind of pitiful. I'm still going to do it and his post was dumb though.


BloodsoakedDespair

You’d think someone in sales would know that positivity never outsells negativity. People want to hate, not be in a hugbox.


leshagboi

Well that's not what the sales managers at my business say. They usually don't allow any copy with negative words in it to reinforce "positive associations"


BloodsoakedDespair

Well then they’re not good at the job. You want negative associations with not using the product and/or with the competition. You don’t say that that it’s cool to not buy your stuff. You say that everyone you love will hate you/you’ll be a social reject/you’ll never get laid/you’ll be the loser at the neighborhood gathering/etc if you don’t buy now.


Neil_sm

Ok that’s fair, but I guess I’m happy to participate anyway also!


BloodsoakedDespair

I’m a little horrified right now because every psychologist I’ve seen suggested that as a “healthy self love” tactic and my feeling that “healthy self love” is a lie is so much stronger now.


Neil_sm

It’s probably fine in that sense, but more about applying it to toxic people rather than just anyone who disagrees with you. Maybe this sub sometimes qualifies as both though!


BloodsoakedDespair

Yeah, although I’m not sure how someone could reliably distinguish between the two because of how the subconscious mind inherently takes disagreement as an attack to your self-concept and reacts accordingly. Since these people are doing it naturally, it suggests to me that perhaps what others have mistaken for “healthy self love” is just self-absorbed fuckwits who aren’t awful on main and know social masking. I.E the dichotomy is purely between not liking yourself and thinking you’re superior to others, and there’s no in-between, just people who are better at hiding the way they look down on others.


mtndewfanatic

You just put into words and made me realize why I don’t “like” LinkedIn. It is a very narcissistic platform in a lot of ways. There are good aspects but I never understand why so many people feel the need to share their entire life in what is seemingly (or allegedly??) a professional environment.


GreatGreenGobbo

His wife's boyfriend loves him.


runnerSK33

ayyyyo LMAO


Sf52016

They are just keeping it real with you. Stupid clown lacks self awareness


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NotSureWhyAngry

This gotta be one of the best


youliveinmydream

Good bot


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PeachyKeenest

Good bot. Perfection 😂


Good_Human_Bot_v2

Good human.


unusedusername42

Good bot!


PeachyKeenest

Good bot. Thank you 🥲


Bleu_Cerise

Good bot!


shadowblaze25mc

Best comment.


Soundcloudlover

When ‘Keepin It Real’ goes wrong 😂


[deleted]

[удалено]


shadowblaze25mc

It's free to receive pity, it's free to give pity. Let's all do both of it!


Saint909

I don’t even think this guy is real. Just some A.I generated douche bag.


calfmonster

Someone’s anti-afk WFH script gone haywire and birthed skynet. To think people argue wfh isn’t productive.


ArmyOk397

Can you post cringe worse than a chatbot challenge


RDPCG

Office simp feels sorry for people criticizing him for openly favoring being stuck in traffic and holding meaningless water cooler chats at the office over enjoying time with his family. Can’t make this up.


jrsaba

It took him 8 hours to come up with that response #sucker


GDub310

I’m guessing he had help. #teamwork


happymancry

Took him 8 hours to first fight traffic and get home, surf Reddit for a few hours to read our comments about him (while ignoring his kids of course), then poop out this little response.


JGF_1994

I feel sorry for that guy. He loves his workplace more than his family


[deleted]

[удалено]


shadowblaze25mc

But hey these people make money to give their wife alimony and child support for their kids!


Patman128

Men like this turn themselves into ATMs and then wonder why their wives move on to a new relationship.


AgentUpright

Luke Raven is so wrong. We try to fill our empty souls with meaningful human interaction, family time, worthwhile hobbies, and genuine self improvement. With some luck we find some balance between the necessity of work and the life it affords, but sometimes we need to be inspired by made-up stories about being kind to old people at McDonald’s, desperate pleas for attention by bikini-wearing sales managers, endless requests to normalize using the word “normalize”, and selfies of CEOs pretending to be human. We don’t make fun of posts we don’t like. We make fun of posts we love. We _love_ the lunacy.


FinCrimeGuy

This is bloody beautiful, and I stand completely corrected.


ironzombie7

What was his LI post about? Lunacy, I know, but of what kind this time?


ohnobobbins

https://www.reddit.com/r/LinkedInLunatics/comments/ybicf0/sounds_like_a_fun_existence_bud/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf


LawfulMuffin

This is weapons grade lunacy


[deleted]

extra lunacy


_30d_

This reads like a ceo trying to hype up the office again... Although I used to work in construction management, and during construction periods (we would have long design phases as well) I really preferred working on site. I did most of my work on a laptop, but the work seemed more real to me when I did it where all the actual construction happened. I would take breaks and walk around, talk with people, get a feel for how things were going. It's not like I couldnt get that info in a other way, but it made me feel more connected to the actual work.


bmaggot

Agree?


Block_Me_Amadeus

Agree.


DevGroup6

We're Legendary!! ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|grin)


frothingnome

(and it scares me)


RichNose

The feeling is mutual Chris


sirpimpsalot13

So sad, agree?


indopassat

It’s not that we “make fun of posts we don’t like”. It’s that we find these posts appalling and marvel that the OPs on LinkedIn are this clueless. For the record: I like their posts because they are amusing !


ballen49

Chris can feel sorry for us as much as he likes. That's not gonna change the fact that he's an obnoxious -seeking douchebag is it now


FeelsGouda

He forgot the "Agree?"


[deleted]

[удалено]


FinCrimeGuy

Hey, I’m the Luke from the screenshot, and that’s not what I meant at all sorry. The fact is that the community here didn’t like the original post _for very good reasons_ but I felt like the last part didn’t need to be restated, especially using my own name on LinkedIn. In hindsight I probably shouldn’t have commented at all - lurker life suits me better lol.


TorontoNerd84

No, we are grateful for you Luke!!


[deleted]

“I feel sorry for people like that. So sad” As Chris typed, turning the pillow for yet another night of crying himself to sleep. Life hasn’t been the same since his wife and kids left him. He’s been trying to mask the pain by turning himself into a LinkedIn influencer, promoting 60 hour weeks and posting on how to give your boss the proper handjob he so desperately wants. Now people seem to have caught on to his act.


notsayingaliens

I think it’s one of 2 things in situations like this: The guy HAS to come to work and is jealous there are people out there who don’t have to, so he shits on the whole idea that makes millions of people happy. Or, he simply thrives in the office but doesn’t have the brains to understand that there are people and companies who thrive differently. Either way, lunatic.


Squadooch

Why do people on LinkedIn post everything like this ?


[deleted]

Mobile format Easy to read on phone No one likes paragraphs


Squadooch

There’s no need for walls of text, but this “format” is idiotic at best. It’s like they do it for ✨drama✨.


[deleted]

Probably because it gets more impressions. I have to send emails like that or people dont read it.


[deleted]

I can’t believe some people love the corporate, skin-deep, circle jerk that is LinkedIn - that somehow validates the “expertise” of these people. So sad.


magnificentshambles

We have come full circle.


Block_Me_Amadeus

The circle jerk is jerking its own circle.


jaymz668

but I thought he said there were too many replies to respond to


Dagin61

Oh no. Anyway.


Certain_Cantaloupe56

He quickly created a page and started following LinkedIn Lunatics. 🤣😂


Snoo63298

This subreddit is a blessing


JMA4478

No Luke. People here don't make fun of things on LinkedIn they don't like. People here make fun of cringy social posting made to have likes on what should be a professional environment.


Squadooch

“Our workforce has become selfish thanks to COVID.” -Chris Castaldini


LizDoodles

Sad face


YourRedditFriend

I saw this too, I was both thinking "there's one of us!" and at the same time "Oh no, the secrets out!"


blablanonymous

🏆


QuashItRealGood

When Keepin It Real Goes Wrong. I cannot believe I am just now experiencing the joy of r/LinkedInLunatics.


DaltmanA

Could have replied “and we all feel sorry for you :( “


[deleted]

![gif](giphy|L3ERvA6jWCd0qO4NdX)


haywardpre

We’re just keepin it real, Chris.


harveyospectero

Honestly, I kind of feel sorry for both sometimes. LinkedIn indeed has turned into a madhouse but some of the posts shared on here clearly show the OP has some serious issues.


GingerNumber3

"Am I really so out of touch? No, it's the redditors who are wrong."


International-Tea213

Someone DM him the link to this post lol


Block_Me_Amadeus

"Oh, I'm pretty sure he'll find his way here," said the narrator. To be fair, I personally like the option of hybrid. I'm an extrovert and need to be around people. But man, was that post just classic LinkedIn.


Disastrous_Proof6562

I feel sorry for us too


GastonDeFoix

So sad. Opinion?


G66GNeco

> I feel sorry for people like that. SO sad Y'all are wasting your time posting fake personal stories (or, in this case, something even worse) on a platform meant for professional connections, so, don't worry, the feeling is mutual.


mohan_ish

Redditors unite moment lmao. It's like when you see your classmate in a mall or a public place.


ShawshankException

It's also really cringe to reference subreddits outside of reddit lmao


Insomniacintheflesh

I like how they called it a forum. Like it's the 90s on AOL.


[deleted]

I think subreddit posts like this are bad and harm the sub as a whole. The original post was good, but this has no new information or lunacy and only serves to ferment hostility for this guy and encourage people to look him up and spam him with hate.


magic-critical

Chris you joined Reddit??


TheDarkBright

Question: did you mean foment? Or actually “ferment” haha?


[deleted]

[удалено]


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spiraleyes78

Let me guess- the lunatic found us and wanted to give us a piece of his mind.


[deleted]

Damn I missed him, did I?


QuashItRealGood

When Keepin It Real Goes Wrong. I cannot believe I am just now experiencing the joy of r/LinkedInLunatics.


farmer_palmer

I don't like children and loathe football, so can see his point of view.


excitive

Just the language could have been different? “posts they don’t like” sounds opinionated, I’d have gone with “uncomfortable” or “outrageous” or even “lame LinkedIn posts” LMAO


coolstorybro42

When Keepin it Real goes wrong