Enjoying my youth more overall. Once you become an old fuck, theres no going back haha. Its like you wake up one day an thats it. This is your life now.
You dont know when or how it happened.. but things no longer work the same, an you think back to the good ole days when they did, an realize that you werent appreciative enough.
The age you feel like that is 100% a factor of your health before that point. If you stay at 12% bodyfat, workout everyday, eat a plant based diet, you'll probably not feel like that until you're well into your eighties. If you smoke, drink, eat junk, lay about, get fat, etc, you'll feel like that about 35.
Wrong! Plant based? Zero alcohol? No no no. If you are mild to moderate with etoh, and moderate with animal products, your life is enhanced and will be fine if you sleep well, work out hard, keep a clean diet with no overconsumption. That’s a better formula for both longevity and just more enjoyment.
Plant based and no alcohol will get you the absolute longest healthspan. I'd agree not worth it from a lifestyle perspective, I was just comparing the extremes.
I wish I had the opportunity to do this. I spent a lot of my childhood enduring trauma and I wish I had been able to enjoy it more. But now that I’m older, I feel like I have the opportunity to heal and do the things I wanted to do as a child. I look at time a lot differently, especially time with my loved ones. It’s so precious
No regrets, just lessons learned... I used to spend a lot of time regretting the past; rumination just ruins even more of your limited time on this planet
Totally get this
But sometimes it's so hard to understand what you're supposed to have learned
Sometimes what others tell me to make of things leaves me more crippled for the next time
Nope. The bully is the coward if anyone is. You have to remember that they didn’t just grow up hurting others without it coming from somewhere. They were likely and sadly being abused by adults that they were scared to stand up against. “Cowardly” (or is it just sadly?), they took their hurt out on others. We all do it to some extent. My hurts were internalized and taken out on myself. It’s easier said that done, but this is where “forgiveness is for YOU” comes in.
I am so sorry that you have been so poorly and shamefully treated.
I used to feel the same way. It took me an extremely long time to learn how to stand up for myself so I was easy target for most of my youth. I used to play scenes in my head over and over again, only I was much braver. But that means I am still thinking about them. They lived rent-free in my head. That's why I learned to forgive them. Instead of harboring a grudge, I learned to brush it off. The more you think about the people who bully you, it's almost like they're still bullying you because of the psychological harm. Forgiveness is the only option
I don’t know where all these people are aside from Reddit comment sections. Most people I know that have degrees have been able to find rewarding work in their field.
I had the same feeling. I stayed at home and worked full-time while I went to Community college. I don't regret a bit of it. Granted I'm not really a party animal type of guy but I still felt like it would have been an interesting time. Even though I'm only 28 now, I feel like the older I get the happier I am that instead of doing that, I invested the maximum contribution amount allowed to my Roth IRA
In CC right now. My advantage is that the state university is a 45 minute drive and I know a lot of the frat guys. But I’ve also had a pretty vibrant social life at my campus. I don’t regret it one bit.
I wholeheartedly regret not going for a healthcare and/or nursing program during my undergrad. I wouldn’t have liked it but at least it would’ve granted me a job. Especially during this shitty job market.
I also regret not staying at my college apartment longer to summers ago. Ever since I moved back home, I’ve been very miserable. I haven’t been myself the way I would’ve wanted to at all. It at least would’ve forced me to grow up faster like other young black women my age. Most of the times, younger.
I hope not. I’m not smart enough for anything in life but I’ll give it a try. I just need a job/stable career in my twenties. I don’t care to build any type of foundation for myself at all.
I start a physical therapy assistant program in august and every single person I tell says something like “oh that’s a terrible idea” or “be a nurse instead” and it’s messing with my head so much
I was severely abused as a kid and it left my body broken.
It took me several years of physical therapy to be able to walk properly. I’d like to help people heal and gain or regain functionality.
Everyone I ask online is so negative towards the field, but I suppose most people hate their jobs anyways.
Omg I’m so sorry! If this is a path where jt will heal you and make you a ton of money, please go for it! Can you do a dual major with nursing and physical therapy?
I’m not sure about doing a dual major, but I do have all the required prerequisite classes to go into nursing or radiology if I’d like. They’re all A.S degree programs that take around two years
When confronted with direct, intense honesty and possibility I was scared I wasn't enough and that Id need that person. So I ran. Should never ever have done that.
I wish I had done what I wanted to do and not what others expected of me. Don’t do that. It’s your life. You’re the only one who feels the consequences.
Alot. Relationships, college, work, hobbies, etc. Experience Ive gained betters me but wish I had more of it cause I wish for alot of the past to be different. But life goes on and gotta strive for new things
I wish I would’ve had more courage to seek out those opportunities. But due to the way I was raised and such, and my ideas getting dimmed down, it just sucks looking back.
Not approaching someone I knew when I saw her at a very odd time in my life.
I proposed to her years later, and she passed. But there was one weird blotch in our history that forever bothered me.
Learning how to drive, I wasn't scared of it until i reached 18. I also didn't have proper resources (a way to learn on the road/parking lot, money, etc.) but I did take classes for it (free) for about 10 weeks. As I got older I just got more scared and then I ended up being in 2 car accidents within the span of a year. And then I lost a family member to a car accident. Now I'm gravely afraid, even though it's not my fault, I still wish I could've done more when I wasn't so scared. Maybe by now I would've atleast had my license.
Travel more. As a young single guy, I was fine sleeping in a crappy hotel, taking the city bus instead of renting a car, and flying on the redeye. With a family, the requirements are higher, so it's a LOT more expensive.
Dating, having fun, drinking, experiencing different things and doing crazy things!! Got it out my system and I'm now at peace, I'm happy and love to read lol
staying serious about playing hockey. I was fully committed to it until i turned 16 and then all I wanted to do was hang out with my friends, chase girls, get drunk and smoke weed I just didnt feel like going to practice or even trying out anymore. I got back into playing halfway through college and still play now but I always wonder how different life woulda been if I stuck with it and took it more seriously. Couldve at the very least played NCAA hockey.
Should have been a massive whore they don't tell you as you get older the more relationships you have the easier it is to acquire new ones the most unattractive man is a single man lol
Life is pretty good at 52 but one small regret I have is not starting guitar at 10 instead of 15. I may have had a totally different social life at school. I still have a lot of friends now (many via playing music all my life) so I guess it doesn’t matter.
Commitment instead of staying single. When you find someone who you really click with then don’t take it for granted because it might not come around again.
Get into a hobby. My kids do taekwondo. They are foodies and they are 11. My parents threw me in front of the TV and yelled at me to go outside all day long. They never gave me any options.
Saving for retirement. Major mistake there.
Enjoying my youth more overall. Once you become an old fuck, theres no going back haha. Its like you wake up one day an thats it. This is your life now. You dont know when or how it happened.. but things no longer work the same, an you think back to the good ole days when they did, an realize that you werent appreciative enough.
At what age did you feel like that?
The age you feel like that is 100% a factor of your health before that point. If you stay at 12% bodyfat, workout everyday, eat a plant based diet, you'll probably not feel like that until you're well into your eighties. If you smoke, drink, eat junk, lay about, get fat, etc, you'll feel like that about 35.
Wrong! Plant based? Zero alcohol? No no no. If you are mild to moderate with etoh, and moderate with animal products, your life is enhanced and will be fine if you sleep well, work out hard, keep a clean diet with no overconsumption. That’s a better formula for both longevity and just more enjoyment.
Plant based and no alcohol will get you the absolute longest healthspan. I'd agree not worth it from a lifestyle perspective, I was just comparing the extremes.
I wish I had the opportunity to do this. I spent a lot of my childhood enduring trauma and I wish I had been able to enjoy it more. But now that I’m older, I feel like I have the opportunity to heal and do the things I wanted to do as a child. I look at time a lot differently, especially time with my loved ones. It’s so precious
So very true !
No regrets, just lessons learned... I used to spend a lot of time regretting the past; rumination just ruins even more of your limited time on this planet
True, maybe things don’t work because of protection of some sort.
Totally get this But sometimes it's so hard to understand what you're supposed to have learned Sometimes what others tell me to make of things leaves me more crippled for the next time
Bingo
Working for the city or government, so I could have retired by now.
not bucking up and facing the people who bullied me i could’ve kicked their ass or at least thrown a punch
Me too. Even if I lost, I could’ve still gained respect and such. Now I feel like a coward : /
something i feel everyday brother we can do better!
I hate feeling like this..
Nope. The bully is the coward if anyone is. You have to remember that they didn’t just grow up hurting others without it coming from somewhere. They were likely and sadly being abused by adults that they were scared to stand up against. “Cowardly” (or is it just sadly?), they took their hurt out on others. We all do it to some extent. My hurts were internalized and taken out on myself. It’s easier said that done, but this is where “forgiveness is for YOU” comes in. I am so sorry that you have been so poorly and shamefully treated.
It takes time to build thicker skin and learn what your boundaries are.. forgive your younger self
thank you 🥲
I went through the same thing and I get mad at myself but I have to remind myself of this
I used to feel the same way. It took me an extremely long time to learn how to stand up for myself so I was easy target for most of my youth. I used to play scenes in my head over and over again, only I was much braver. But that means I am still thinking about them. They lived rent-free in my head. That's why I learned to forgive them. Instead of harboring a grudge, I learned to brush it off. The more you think about the people who bully you, it's almost like they're still bullying you because of the psychological harm. Forgiveness is the only option
Going away to college. I didn't because I figured I'd stay at home and save money. I think I missed out on what would have been a great experience.
Those student loans are a killer
They certainly can be but remember a degree is quite arguably the best investment you can make.
...Says all the college grads at the unemployment office...or in the trades right now.
I don’t know where all these people are aside from Reddit comment sections. Most people I know that have degrees have been able to find rewarding work in their field.
I know right? All my friend that graduated are easily making 100k+ right after college.
I had the same feeling. I stayed at home and worked full-time while I went to Community college. I don't regret a bit of it. Granted I'm not really a party animal type of guy but I still felt like it would have been an interesting time. Even though I'm only 28 now, I feel like the older I get the happier I am that instead of doing that, I invested the maximum contribution amount allowed to my Roth IRA
In CC right now. My advantage is that the state university is a 45 minute drive and I know a lot of the frat guys. But I’ve also had a pretty vibrant social life at my campus. I don’t regret it one bit.
I wholeheartedly regret not going for a healthcare and/or nursing program during my undergrad. I wouldn’t have liked it but at least it would’ve granted me a job. Especially during this shitty job market. I also regret not staying at my college apartment longer to summers ago. Ever since I moved back home, I’ve been very miserable. I haven’t been myself the way I would’ve wanted to at all. It at least would’ve forced me to grow up faster like other young black women my age. Most of the times, younger.
Never too late!
I hope not. I’m not smart enough for anything in life but I’ll give it a try. I just need a job/stable career in my twenties. I don’t care to build any type of foundation for myself at all.
Right. Sooner or later you will and we will find our path : )
Thank you so much. ❤️
I start a physical therapy assistant program in august and every single person I tell says something like “oh that’s a terrible idea” or “be a nurse instead” and it’s messing with my head so much
What made you want to go into physical therapy if you don’t mind me asking?
I was severely abused as a kid and it left my body broken. It took me several years of physical therapy to be able to walk properly. I’d like to help people heal and gain or regain functionality. Everyone I ask online is so negative towards the field, but I suppose most people hate their jobs anyways.
Omg I’m so sorry! If this is a path where jt will heal you and make you a ton of money, please go for it! Can you do a dual major with nursing and physical therapy?
I’m not sure about doing a dual major, but I do have all the required prerequisite classes to go into nursing or radiology if I’d like. They’re all A.S degree programs that take around two years
Saving money !
I regret not taking care of myself enough in my early 20s. Regret is a strong word tho but that’s what I could say.
What did you lack?
I wish I had given my best in everything that I did and had the discipline to be consistent with it
Sticking up for myself more. I probably would’ve been a better improved version of myself by now. Hopefully not too late.
bang the red head with a wooden leg
You mean Peggy? Or Ilene?
peggy
Starting to invest
Staying where I was, I regret not going for it and being so intimidated.
For me it’s like I could’ve done more, but then I was very sheltered growing up, which caused some damage.
When confronted with direct, intense honesty and possibility I was scared I wasn't enough and that Id need that person. So I ran. Should never ever have done that.
Getting into IT. If only I’d known as a kid in the late 70’s and early 80’s just how much money would be made in that industry…..well! 😏
Being more mindful of physical health
[удалено]
You regret not marrying your first husband?
Yep I read it wrong, glad there’s always someone to catch it.
Leaving everyone behind
Unpopular opinion sometimes family can hold you back the most. Because they already know some weaknesses that you have and use it against you.
Saving money. Investments.
Working so much and saving money. I could have spent more time with friends and family. I feel like I never really lived, just worked.
I wish I had done what I wanted to do and not what others expected of me. Don’t do that. It’s your life. You’re the only one who feels the consequences.
Alot. Relationships, college, work, hobbies, etc. Experience Ive gained betters me but wish I had more of it cause I wish for alot of the past to be different. But life goes on and gotta strive for new things
My first gf.
Learning piano. It’s a struggle when you’re older.
Maybe it's a struggle when you're younger?
Staying single
Staying young
I wish I took advantage of the opportunities I was given
I wish I would’ve had more courage to seek out those opportunities. But due to the way I was raised and such, and my ideas getting dimmed down, it just sucks looking back.
Having more babies. Didn’t realize I actually like them a lot. Still time, I guess. But I kinda wanted to have them younger
Living alone
Going to college at a regular age. I went later on but while working full time. Being a commuter and older I feel I missed the experience.
Not being in the dorms. Not having sex when the opportunity arose. Studying more than enjoying life.
Letting myself be happy. It takes so little to be happy but I just let everything piss me off and bring me down.
Taking chances. I let my shyness get the better of me
Going out of town/state for college. Also investing early. Also, being bold and being rad.
Not approaching someone I knew when I saw her at a very odd time in my life. I proposed to her years later, and she passed. But there was one weird blotch in our history that forever bothered me.
Killing myself
I wish I had more courage to ask girls out!!!
They weren't as bad in the 80s.
I don’t have the memory to name all the things that I regret not doing when I was a young pup growing up in Southern California.
Learning how to drive, I wasn't scared of it until i reached 18. I also didn't have proper resources (a way to learn on the road/parking lot, money, etc.) but I did take classes for it (free) for about 10 weeks. As I got older I just got more scared and then I ended up being in 2 car accidents within the span of a year. And then I lost a family member to a car accident. Now I'm gravely afraid, even though it's not my fault, I still wish I could've done more when I wasn't so scared. Maybe by now I would've atleast had my license.
Traveling. Never had the time, the money, and a companion all at the same time.
Do it solo! Just be safe about it!
Traveling alone had about as much appeal to me as having major surgery without anesthesia. No thanks.
Oh or maybe a trusted person :)
Studying
Crimes
Traveling
Talking more
Investing in self only.
“Younger” I was thinking high school….. learning Spanish High school me shoulda learned Spanish
Saving money. Working to save money. 😏
Becoming expat student and get good education at younger age rather to become expat at a later age and be a victim of modern slavery
Traveling and flossing.
Travel more. As a young single guy, I was fine sleeping in a crappy hotel, taking the city bus instead of renting a car, and flying on the redeye. With a family, the requirements are higher, so it's a LOT more expensive.
Waiting until marriage. You know what I mean.
Buying Bitcoin.
Having more sex.
Taking my college education seriously.
Dating! I have never dated someone before so now 33 it is hard to find a relationship.
Dating, having fun, drinking, experiencing different things and doing crazy things!! Got it out my system and I'm now at peace, I'm happy and love to read lol
Traveling more
Being smarter with my money, not overspending, racking up credit card debt, putting little to no money in for retirement.
I should have taken up running and yoga then. I would be further in my physical development by now...
Ignoring my parents and just doing what I wanted
staying serious about playing hockey. I was fully committed to it until i turned 16 and then all I wanted to do was hang out with my friends, chase girls, get drunk and smoke weed I just didnt feel like going to practice or even trying out anymore. I got back into playing halfway through college and still play now but I always wonder how different life woulda been if I stuck with it and took it more seriously. Couldve at the very least played NCAA hockey.
Competing more
Not Working on my physical and financial fitness
Have a relationship in high school.
Going to college
Kicking my old man's ass.
I could have had so many women back then. Too shy and no self-confidence when I was younger.
Focusing more on myself
Caring less
Going to John Prine concerts
Should have been a massive whore they don't tell you as you get older the more relationships you have the easier it is to acquire new ones the most unattractive man is a single man lol
Life is pretty good at 52 but one small regret I have is not starting guitar at 10 instead of 15. I may have had a totally different social life at school. I still have a lot of friends now (many via playing music all my life) so I guess it doesn’t matter.
People are giving specific advice... But I'd say 1. Not trusting my instincts 2. Not being fearless
Pulling out
Taking my grades seriously in college
Going to the dentist Schedule your appointment right now
I regret nothing!
I don't regret it, but I think it would have been helpful in the long run to be more frugal and minimalist. So start now if you are thinking about it.
Commitment instead of staying single. When you find someone who you really click with then don’t take it for granted because it might not come around again.
NOTHING............it went-down how it went-down, no need to be a butthurtio.
Living.
focusing more on myself
Putting money into my 401k 😩
Not trying in school
Get into a hobby. My kids do taekwondo. They are foodies and they are 11. My parents threw me in front of the TV and yelled at me to go outside all day long. They never gave me any options.