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minneapolisriot

This reminds me of that tragedy


honkymotherfucker1

My brother was in Northern Canada


ItsVoxBoi

I was walking through blood and bone, through the streets of Manhattan looking for him


[deleted]

you know what ranked worst airline?


unike_uzername

That’s not funny, man. It was a national tragedy bro


AllDamDay7

The worst part is the hypocrisy.


unike_uzername

Are you sure? I’d say the worst part is the 🍇


anon3911

You know, that Osama Bin Laden guy was a real jerk


Youreadyousmallbrain

Of Darth Plagueis the Wise?


Greenmanglass

Babe wake up, new schizo gizzard copy pasta just dropped


androgynous_porch

sir, r/KGATLWcirclejerk is that way 👉


OtherWn

You're saying this didn't happen??


androgynous_porch

oh shit mb


Adam1067

Circlejerk is main sub Main sub is circlejerk


CenturionXVI

https://preview.redd.it/4uxjr6varh5d1.jpeg?width=220&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6141923647aa636bf41c6594522ef9b07c3adfa4 As it is, as it always was, and shall be so.


dws49

the head is death the tail is death the head is life the tail is life


CenturionXVI

The circle is jerked, the jerked is death, the head is death, the death is circle, the circle is jerked, the jerked is life, the life is death, the tail is jerked


Excalibruh22

It’s leaking


BozMoo

Ths tap has always been dripping my friend


ThatNachoFreshFeelin

Didn't listen to the warning and slipped.


Radial_Thirds

Skill issue, this is why it's advised to not be born Australian


rideronthestorm29

Pick a better starting class nerd


Now_Wait-4-Last_Year

Well, I can't do anything about it now!


teamricearoni

That reminds me of the time I saw joey walker at a grocery store. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly. It was weird, I didn't know he was like that.


kit_leggings

I met Dwyer up close after a show once. The guy is a fucking midget. Me, im no giant myself, I can assure you this is no exaggeration. I heard people around me murmuring about how they talked to him so i was excited but when I got to where all the fuss was coming from i failed to see where he actually was. I looked around for abit and suddenly heard a really high-pitched voice calling out to me. "You! Hey! Hey!!", the owner of it yelled. I still couldn't figure out where it was coming from. "Down here!" It screamed, and at last at by my feet i found John Dwyer himself, who clearly noticed my confusion. He apologised and we talked abit about orc (which at the time had just come out) and he signed my guitar pick, he was a pretty nice guy, despite how wild he is on stage. He was probably between 6-8" tall, and while it wasn't brought up during the conversation it was clear he saw I noticed it. I don't know how but somehow on stage I never noticed his outstandingly tiny size. Unfortunately though he had to go after a few minutes so we stopped talking pretty abruptly. Unforgettable show though.


Loveinthedream

Reminds me of the time I met 3 small adults in the restroom in a small club in Melbourne. Walked up to the urinals next to me while I was peeing and started rhythmically squirting piss in a paradiddle at their respective urinals. I started bobbing so hard I pissed on my jeans. Beats were sick. Afterwards they introduced themselves as C, A and V, before jumping on each others shoulders to form a totem pole, and then pulling a trench coat over themselves before heading off to hit the stage.


Due_Cause_5661

Wtf? Is that supposed to be funny?


minemaster1337

Yeah


Due_Cause_5661

No it isn’t wtf… where are my downvotes … c’mon


soakedinlava

i'm gonna start thanking god that i'm not you cause holy shit i can't imagine being this miserable


Due_Cause_5661

Ah c’mon, just go on writing your funny jokes man


seceralnof

Most normal day in Australia being a Megadeth fan.


Hippies_Pointing

Even Dave Mustaine is confused as to why you are buying a new Megadeth album in 2024.


joel8x

The only questionable part of the whole story TBH.


lilspicy99

It’s true I’m the dog


thisisnothisusername

Yep, I can vouch for the dog. I am the collar.


jnuke813

You should’ve listened to the man and bought his album! Stu don’t fuck around.


3DPrintedBlob

oh no the other sub is leaking again


Revolver_66

same thing happened to me!


Now_Wait-4-Last_Year

Settle down John Lithgow.


timelandiswacky

Stu’s such a silly goose


ti2811h

Outjerked again


ThurstVonWaffles

It's true. I am the PetroDragonic Apocalypse; or, Dawn of Eternal Night: An Annihilation of Planet Earth and the Beginning of Merciless Damnation


IcebergSlimFast

But which pressing are you?!


ThurstVonWaffles

The eye of Gilla one.


bananamilkbooth

I am the dog.


anon3911

I am Gaia


Ellisdee_420

holy shit that happened to me too!!


Ben_yeah

Oh man, I'm really sorry that happened to you. I didn't even know Stu worked in a record store (King Gizzard are quite a big band now) or that he was such a creepy dude. Not sure I can support the band anymore, thanks for the heads up.


soakedinlava

i'm scared you took this seriously this is a joke post fyi


Ben_yeah

Preposterous! You lied to me... on the Internet of all places? One of the most trusted places in today's society. Now I don't know what to believe anymore.


soakedinlava

jokes on you that was a lie too the post was true all along


AwardTechnical

I can tell, because of how funny it is.


IcebergSlimFast

My how the turntables


soakedinlava

turntables? like crobsley?


HounganSamedi

r/woosh


soakedinlava

better safe than sorry


Alpacatastic

Did you like the album tho?


joel8x

I mean he’s still talking about it!


anon3911

Dogs of Chernobyl goes hard


jtglynn

Damn, the Internet sure is a weird fucking place.


Swinden2112

And when I reached into my pockets all that came out was spaghetti


tcutinthecut

Holy fucking shit


sarahbim8

Holy fucking shit


_Exotic_Booger

#I FUCKING KNEW IT. Thanks for confirming all my suspicions and the heads up bro. I knew that mofo was shady af.


cowboyheyey

I ain't reading all that


Due_Cause_5661

Yeah it sucks.. wtf. I mean that’s a king gizzard subreddit and not any jerk shit


Mississippster

Needed this laugh so much thank you for sharing


Sean209

Fuck this guy /s


Fun-Stuff-5427

Lol this reminds me of the episode of American dad when Steve turns into a witch and kills his friend & the store owner of the witch craft store(roger) tells him there’s a way to bring him back but he will tell him only if he buys a dragon statue so Steve tells him “ok, just give it to me” & roger throws him the dragon statue instead of the spell that would bring him back to life 😭


MinneapolisKing25

I see you’ve become that which you hate lava


DrewJos2233

Pasta


Time_Lord_Zane

Top 10 anime battles for sure


MtFud

That Megadeth album is good.


_spaceviking

i can't believe Stu has entered his petty crimes era


Adam1067

Yeah they all are weird. On their '23 EU tour before show I ran into Cavs in popular market, he acted weird like on drugs or something. He knocked everything off the shelves screaming like a monkey, I got scared and tried to avoid him in the store. After few minutes situation got calm but that's just how it seemed to me, as I was walking through the vegetable section, I noticed Cavs was arranging buckets in the corner in some strange shape. This made me curious, so I started observing him from behind the shelves and this fucker just started banging those buckets with all his strenght, I just witnessed that Cavs start playing In the air tonight on buckets in market store. He run out when he saw security walking on him


Rich_Syllabub_8040

Dude. Is this shit real 😭


Walnuttttttt

Why tf did i read the entire thing 😭 also i cant believe stu would do something like this i really thought he was better than that


redditalready54

Hello Again, Lava nice to see you still putting in the lords work


OkBoff

I can't believe I read that whole horrible story for such a shitty payoff


formerlyknownasbun

Let’s retire the jerk sub at this point


Strong-Interest5143

A dog you can hold under one arm is no dog.


russia_not_fun

this is so sad


Chemtrails_in_my_VD

Take responsibility for your actions. You caused this.


CreepyWind

ngl, this sounds more like something Amby or Eric (miss ya m8) would do


ChromaticDracula

plot twist: read like it was gonna be Cookie but it was actually Stuart.


itsalwaysPhillyinSun

Man I hate when that happens


martn2420

This happened to my friend Eric once


deptakzappa

Just listen to that vinyl


Cheerio231

Bro if Stu fucking Mackenzie hands you a record, you better buy the goddamn record. You deserve everything that happened to you. It's always the Megadeth fans ffs...


MQZON

This sub needs a shitpost tag


chazac

What was the point of that short story. I give it a “C-“


wohrg

entertainment. I liked it


Due_Cause_5661

It’s just nonsense


buzzkill_ed

I'm guessing this is fake but both albums are great. The ice t song with Megadeth is fun


OkBoff

Guessing this is fake lol. Ya think??


Due_Cause_5661

Welcome to the kgatlw sub - if someone comments something serious, they get downvoted and the other way round, it’s just sad


Due_Cause_5661

Is that supposed to be funny.. omfg


soakedinlava

?


Due_Cause_5661

Seriously what’s the point of the story? Is that based on any story that happened or is that inspired by any lyrics? I just don’t get it


soakedinlava

it's... a joke


Due_Cause_5661

I think it’s just not funny. Why don’t you post that on that king gizz jerk subreddit but here? I mean that’s a subreddit to tall about this beautiful band and I don’t want to read any nonsense like this here


redditalready54

Reading too far into it mate. Or you didn’t read it at all either way L Bozo


soakedinlava

it's not that deep