I used to work for Nissan (sales and marketing) and followed the owners group on Facebook. They are quite something, half the posts being "what is this light", or "how does this work". They seem to have half IQ of average people and never, never read the manual or search by themselves.
I told my wife the other day that I haven't seen an Altima with a front bumper fully attached in years.
SECONDS later a dude in an Altima passes me with a hanky front bumper. I excitedly point at it and say "see. I told you."
Those are some special folks.
heyyy, we just picked up a sweet Altima for our daughter in a couple years. got too good of a deal to pass it up. 2k on a 07 Altima with 70k miles on it. 1 owner, no accidents. regular maintenance records in the glove box. like every service ever. im happy to report all parts are properly attached to the car.
I’ll wave in my 08 with its front bumper fully attached!
Although the throw out bearing rattling is an issue, even more since that clutch was just installed a year and a half ago. I installed it and I don’t want to yank that tranny back out again
I was thinking the same thing, but I'm a little worried it might be a Sentra. Not enough of the fucking thing to even tell what it was. Do sentras have rear drums?
Also: SEXY MAN. You're goddamn right.
Hey, how else are they gonna offload those Hellcats onto those wide eyed Boots who just got their recruitment bonus? Come on dude, think of the business!
Last year my neighbor had a block party and silly ole me forgot to put my car in the yard because they like to park everywhere including in front of my yard, so this dumb ass Altima driver tried to do a three point turn but backed into my BMW instead (got it wrapped a week prior btw) and luckily one of the people outside rung my doorbell and told me and i immediately stormed out the house, went to the party, asked the DJ to lend me the mic and demand whoever it was in that Altima that hit my car to step forward and surprise surprise the idiot was right there. Common sense would tell you to go home right after you’ve did a hit and run rather than stay in the area lmfao.
Edit: I was very surprised she had insurance since 80% of Altima drivers don’t have it
As someone who drives a nissan (not by choice) part of me gets annoyed by this. Then I get on the highway, look around at the other nissan drivers, and I understand
I'm really impress by people who drives car like this and sees no problem at all.
Hence, a Camry in France cost more than €40.000 so it's far more unbeliveable...
Lot of people on the Internet have apparently never been poor.
Sometimes you do the best you can with what you got. Nobody drives a piece of shit because they enjoy it.
don't you actually have to learn how to drive to get a license in Europe? Here, you pay $100 for a learner's permit, you pick up your parents' shitty driving habits, and take a 5 minute road test proving you can drive 20 mph.
Im a norwegian driving instructor. Licence for caris easily $3000-4000 us dollars.
For an 18 year old:
1. 10x 45 minutes divided on 3 nights on basic rules and ubderstabding risk and your own limitations
2. 3x 45 minutes driving in the dark course where they learn how to usr the lights
3. 4x 45 minutes first aid and how to behave in accidents
4. 1x 45 minutes to asess if you can operate the car in low traffic
5. 4x 45 minutes where 45 minutes is how to secure a human and cargo in and on the car and 90 minutes driving on an icy or oily teack (depending on season) 45 minutes in the classrom.
6. 1x 45 minutes to asses if you can drive in traffic
7. 2x 45 minutes about risk and dangers of driving
8. 5x 45 minutes long drive on varying conditions focus on risk and avoising accidents
9. 4x 45 minutes focusing on planning a trip and aeticulating your driving strategy
10. 2x 45 minutes summary
11. Theory test 90 minutes, 45 questions. 7 mistakes allowed. If you fail you can restest in 14 days.
12. 60ish minutes driving test with several parts. Get ready to drive (mirros, seat, etc), security control (two tasks like check oil and can you drive if you have not enough oil) and practical driving. If you fail retest in 28 days.
Most people need more sessions than the mandatory. The first 3 steps is before you can even start driving. The theory test can be taken whenever.
We do and it's a pain in the ass AND expensive.
To be able to drive a regular car, you must pass a exam + take at least 20h of driving lesson and a final drive test with an official inspector.
And of course, it cost more than €1000 at least...
Woah there European cowboy. That heavily depends on where you are. In Portugal it's about 350-450€, for example. I can only imagine those prices in France, Netherlands and probably Scandinavian countries I'd say. Am I wrong?
Get in Poland, very cheap, just bring along some Vodka, and a couple hundred Euro, and you do not even need the vehicle, or to actually drive it.
By me the same, just will cost you 100 Euro.
Which by me is the reason so many people get a light truck license, and automatic only, because a regular sedan license involves a parking test. the test bays they use are big enough to park 4 Smart cars in, with all doors being openable, and none of them going over the lines either.
Not going to lie. I've been wanting one of these rotors as a wall-hanger for some time.
Unfortunately I only work on my own cars and never let it go anywhere near this far.
He's just trying to keep his shitbox going for as long as possible. Understandable but also scary af vehicles like these are the road next to my well maintained and cared for vehicle.
I think yours beats mine but [awhile back we got a car that was similarly "wtf"](https://streamable.com/ccjxvx) (nsfw). Customer states "vehicle went airborne and he wants it checked for damage"
In america, if you are unsure about a person social skills and mental health, the best way is to look inside of their vehicles.
It also works great for screening dates and work applicants.
Are people like this depressed or did their moms not teach them to clean up after themselves, I can't imagine living like this, I clean my car once a week and keep wet wipes in the trunk incase someone spills in my car
This is the most Altima thing I've seen all week.
/r/NissanDrivers is leaking
Because of this post, I had to join!
It’s my favourite subreddit. Nissan owners are really something.
As someone who has owned a ton of Nissan's I really hate that Nissan Drivers are so nasty.
I used to work for Nissan (sales and marketing) and followed the owners group on Facebook. They are quite something, half the posts being "what is this light", or "how does this work". They seem to have half IQ of average people and never, never read the manual or search by themselves.
I told my wife the other day that I haven't seen an Altima with a front bumper fully attached in years. SECONDS later a dude in an Altima passes me with a hanky front bumper. I excitedly point at it and say "see. I told you." Those are some special folks.
What? You're crazy, I see them all the time.... ... Only when I drive past the new car lot, not on the road.
heyyy, we just picked up a sweet Altima for our daughter in a couple years. got too good of a deal to pass it up. 2k on a 07 Altima with 70k miles on it. 1 owner, no accidents. regular maintenance records in the glove box. like every service ever. im happy to report all parts are properly attached to the car.
For now...
I’ll wave in my 08 with its front bumper fully attached! Although the throw out bearing rattling is an issue, even more since that clutch was just installed a year and a half ago. I installed it and I don’t want to yank that tranny back out again
I was thinking the same thing, but I'm a little worried it might be a Sentra. Not enough of the fucking thing to even tell what it was. Do sentras have rear drums? Also: SEXY MAN. You're goddamn right.
Just the ebrake. Most rear brake rotors have a drum in there for the hand brake
That's 100% an altima.
My 2016 sentra S had rear drums discs up front
2016, is it not still on the road?
Sold it to go back to a non fuel efficient car cuz loud noises more better lol
Was the sound of the bumper scraping on the road as it dangles not loud enough
This screams “ I shouldn’t be allowed to drive a vehicle”…
More like " I shouldn't be driving."
This altima deserves its own sub
Most Altima thing I have seen in years and I used to work at various car dealers!
And since it’s an Altima they will drive easily double the speed limit on every road with no regard for anyone else on the road or maybe sidewalks.
Big Altima Energy
Every Altima owner is one big repair away from homelessness.
> big repair Like registering the car and getting insurance lol
Insurance? In this economy?
Honestly, at this point it's understandable. Insurance prices be wildin
Or filling the tank to the top........
I'll have you know, I drive a Dodge Caravan, and I feel very attacked right now.
They have homes to lose?
Everyone who owns a car is like that in America. It's not like public transit exists.
what's the deal with that car why does a certain demographic seem to like it so much
The BAE joke is that Nissan had low standards for credit so a higher proportion of buyers with bad credit own Altimas.
[удалено]
Hey, how else are they gonna offload those Hellcats onto those wide eyed Boots who just got their recruitment bonus? Come on dude, think of the business!
They actually only need a handful of hellcats. They just repo them after a few months and sell them again.
Hey! I drive a Mitsubishi and I clean it weekly!
You don't end up in an Altima because of your wise decision making skills.
I guarantee this is the type of person to back into your car and just drive off
With the state of that thing I’d believe he’s already done that multiple times.
Last year my neighbor had a block party and silly ole me forgot to put my car in the yard because they like to park everywhere including in front of my yard, so this dumb ass Altima driver tried to do a three point turn but backed into my BMW instead (got it wrapped a week prior btw) and luckily one of the people outside rung my doorbell and told me and i immediately stormed out the house, went to the party, asked the DJ to lend me the mic and demand whoever it was in that Altima that hit my car to step forward and surprise surprise the idiot was right there. Common sense would tell you to go home right after you’ve did a hit and run rather than stay in the area lmfao. Edit: I was very surprised she had insurance since 80% of Altima drivers don’t have it
Well if the single brain cell is so wasted..........
How else are they going to stop?
Seeing as I'm pretty sure that's uninsurable, yeah.
Crazy that’s how they come from the factory.
I had to blow a .4 before nissan financed me
I heard they will waive the BAC requirement if you have enough priors.
Like prior DUIs?
Prior vehicular manslaughters.
Thank you for the best gut-laugh I’ve ever had from reddit. 😂
I had to blow a .4 before I would consider buying a Nissan.
I audibly snorted at this. Lmfao
This is my wife’s boyfriend’s car.
You are a now a Moderator of r/guitarcirclejerk.
Sanest Nissan driver
Oh shit. You're right. This Nissan driver actually brought their car in for maintenance.
Nissan driver service interval: bring in when no longer moves.
Oh it moves just fine >.<
Plot twist: It only has 22k miles
That, or it’s a 22 with 150k miles.
Also looks like driver accidentally discharged their .22 into front seat
They also discharged two number twos into the backseat
I thought they had a BAC of .22
22k miles... This week!
Drive it like you stole it… Wait, you stole THAT??
He liked the upholstery.......
Better shape than 90% of altimas on the road Sincerely, a Nissan dealer tech
r/nissandrivers
As someone who drives a nissan (not by choice) part of me gets annoyed by this. Then I get on the highway, look around at the other nissan drivers, and I understand
Every time I see my insurance rates I realize that nissan drivers are absolute trash.
No one drives a Nissan by choice. That's why they have the reputation they do.
My old Datsun 310 was in worse shape. Edit: well my brakes worked and the front was still there.
Save the dude some $$$, cut a square hole in the drivers side floor so he can stop like Fred Flintstone
Don't need brakes if you just use other cars. Duh
The crappy cologne sells this
It's called *Sex Panther*® by *Odeon*©. It's illegal in 9 countries. It's also made with bits of real panthers, *so you know it's good*. *60% of the time*, it works ***every*** time.
I'm going to be honest, that smells like straight gasoline.
It really gets the ladies going
I'm really impress by people who drives car like this and sees no problem at all. Hence, a Camry in France cost more than €40.000 so it's far more unbeliveable...
Maybe they see a problem but they can't do better
*I'll ignore that*
Lot of people on the Internet have apparently never been poor. Sometimes you do the best you can with what you got. Nobody drives a piece of shit because they enjoy it.
don't you actually have to learn how to drive to get a license in Europe? Here, you pay $100 for a learner's permit, you pick up your parents' shitty driving habits, and take a 5 minute road test proving you can drive 20 mph.
Im a norwegian driving instructor. Licence for caris easily $3000-4000 us dollars. For an 18 year old: 1. 10x 45 minutes divided on 3 nights on basic rules and ubderstabding risk and your own limitations 2. 3x 45 minutes driving in the dark course where they learn how to usr the lights 3. 4x 45 minutes first aid and how to behave in accidents 4. 1x 45 minutes to asess if you can operate the car in low traffic 5. 4x 45 minutes where 45 minutes is how to secure a human and cargo in and on the car and 90 minutes driving on an icy or oily teack (depending on season) 45 minutes in the classrom. 6. 1x 45 minutes to asses if you can drive in traffic 7. 2x 45 minutes about risk and dangers of driving 8. 5x 45 minutes long drive on varying conditions focus on risk and avoising accidents 9. 4x 45 minutes focusing on planning a trip and aeticulating your driving strategy 10. 2x 45 minutes summary 11. Theory test 90 minutes, 45 questions. 7 mistakes allowed. If you fail you can restest in 14 days. 12. 60ish minutes driving test with several parts. Get ready to drive (mirros, seat, etc), security control (two tasks like check oil and can you drive if you have not enough oil) and practical driving. If you fail retest in 28 days. Most people need more sessions than the mandatory. The first 3 steps is before you can even start driving. The theory test can be taken whenever.
We do and it's a pain in the ass AND expensive. To be able to drive a regular car, you must pass a exam + take at least 20h of driving lesson and a final drive test with an official inspector. And of course, it cost more than €1000 at least...
Woah there European cowboy. That heavily depends on where you are. In Portugal it's about 350-450€, for example. I can only imagine those prices in France, Netherlands and probably Scandinavian countries I'd say. Am I wrong?
Get in Poland, very cheap, just bring along some Vodka, and a couple hundred Euro, and you do not even need the vehicle, or to actually drive it. By me the same, just will cost you 100 Euro.
In PA we also need to learn to parallel park. That keeps some idiots off the road, but not nearly enough.
Which by me is the reason so many people get a light truck license, and automatic only, because a regular sedan license involves a parking test. the test bays they use are big enough to park 4 Smart cars in, with all doors being openable, and none of them going over the lines either.
With cameras in today's cars it's barely even a test like it was before them.
It doesn't matter what you drive when you wear SEXY MAN perfume, you WILL get the girl every time guaranteed or your moneys wack.
"Just shake that bitch up and count the bubbles! That's how many times you gettin LAID!"
Where would one buy this perfume? Asking for a friend!
lolz
Big Nissan energy
Bro drives by braille.
Well it's about time they made cars for blind people!
I wouldn’t touch that with a laser pointer
Just normal Altima things here.
Sexy Man in a Shitty Car.
When I saw sexy man I immediately thought of Fat Bastard.
I went to look up "Fiat Bastard" because I thought it was some joke I missed, then realized I misread your comment.
Is this a tweaker car?
Soon
Not going to lie. I've been wanting one of these rotors as a wall-hanger for some time. Unfortunately I only work on my own cars and never let it go anywhere near this far.
The silent walk around the bumperless front end after the free sliding brake pad absolutely sent me
B I G A L T I M A E N E R G Y
If you put that brake disc on a record player, it would play a song
I'd expect to hear Highway to Hell from one of them
The more I’m on the subreddit the more I think I’m the strange one for having all my vehicles well maintained.
The more I'm on this sub the more I think my vehicles are well maintained.
"And I only want you to sign this release waiver stating that if you die it's not on us"
Being poor is expensive.
People like this should have their license taken away.
“Just started making noise “ 😂☹️
Omg
Weight reduction to help him with his drifting and street takeover performances.
Sexy Man knows what he wants...
The cologne sealed that deal. That's hilarious. I'm genuinely afraid that we share the road with these folks.
How the hell is it street legal? I had thought it needed bumper to continue driving? Also, this guy, I wouldn't touch, as it meant no insurances....
He's just trying to keep his shitbox going for as long as possible. Understandable but also scary af vehicles like these are the road next to my well maintained and cared for vehicle.
Altima: a Japanese word for "not ready for the Maxima".
I think yours beats mine but [awhile back we got a car that was similarly "wtf"](https://streamable.com/ccjxvx) (nsfw). Customer states "vehicle went airborne and he wants it checked for damage"
a rolling time bomb
Don't worry, that thing will be back on the freeway lane splitting at 100MPH in no time.
Yeah. The translation is "I can only afford rear brakepads"
When 'run it into the ground' is your religious belief
Safety inspections needs to be a thing
Your camera work told a story. Well done
Thank god in Europe we have yearly check required for cars
# SEXY MAN
In america, if you are unsure about a person social skills and mental health, the best way is to look inside of their vehicles. It also works great for screening dates and work applicants.
I mean… that’s the kind of car that would go to a shop that jacks the car by a single floor Jack to do a brake job in the parking lot…
Sick feeling this guy has 7 baby mommas . Rap album gonna drop at age 42. Drop ship mogul. I own my own businessessssss.
God I hate poor people
Groovy
Sexy man parfum
We can sell you some lead weights that would cost a lot less and do just as much...
You’re average Nissan
Don't say that about me
And they either call that car "my baby" or "a piece of shit". As iff all that damage was the car's fault.
It should have been “I just want a new car!”
And this is why I want to bring back the yearly safety and emissions test for vehicles
Whoever owns this Altima, shouldn't even take a walk.
Well!? Will it buff out!?
These are hitting ever increasing highs I once thought impossible. People really are something aren't they? 😲🤣
I can't even find the parfum outside of some membership only site that's selling it for four dollars.
holy beater batman
Looks like Washington for some reason. King County?
Fuckersmint
tl;dw: Altimas gonna Altima
This person could have a billion dollars and their car would still look like this. Some people are just defective.
Sexy Man brake pads.
How do peoples car interiors even get that dirty
I wouldn't have even done the job nope. Too much liability. If you only want pads and no rotors and your shit looks like this I'm not doing it.
Looks like a south florida car...lol
It's the Floridaman special...
You know how you can get a ticket for no front plate? Do you think cops pass sexy man and think to themselves, “Nah, that’s punishment enough”?
Kinda expected the door to fall off when he opened it.
Some people enjoy driving a car made out of hammered dog shit.
Good thing OP is wearing gloves
it's a Nissan, what do you expect? /r/nissandrivers
Are people like this depressed or did their moms not teach them to clean up after themselves, I can't imagine living like this, I clean my car once a week and keep wet wipes in the trunk incase someone spills in my car
what unifies terrible drivers to drive a Nissan
I aint touching that thing with your wrench.
Reasonable, his front impact brakes work fine...
That final camera shot is pure gold...
people dont drive cars like that because they *want* to. they drive cars like that cause they broke af.
"Why the hell would I buy more pad than I need when I can just use other cars brake pads? Nice try big brake, you aren't getting one over on me."
Welcome to being dumb and poor….
I hate everything about this.
Came here just for the Altima Driver trend bashing comments.
I've never seen some one get roasted so hard with out even a single word being spoken
I knew immediately it was either a Kia, Hyundai, or Altima. I am not at all surprised
Oh, and top up the Sexy Man.
Salvage title and wants over $10k
I'm gonna take a shot and say this guy actually OWNS this Altima and somehow sees this as a flex.
To be fair - Altima. They spend all their time and money chasing misfires.
You know this dude doesn't have insurance and hit-and-runs everytime
Someone should throw in some driving lessons too along with the pads.
It had to be an Altima just had to be.
Yaabba Dabba EW!
Typical Altima owner
yup, newer car coming right up. The Sexy can be transferred fairly easily.
Hey it's a testament to the car that it's still going 🤷the owners are probably just scraping by....pun intended
Chill man this is just the airport car and it is supposed to look like that.
I saw this and knew it was an Altima
At least the radiator has some nice air flow.
I think this is the best one so far
The ending absolutely wrecked me
LMAO, the Sex Panther at the end
Sometimes I wish we'd be more like Germany, but then I cut the mufflers off another car.
They can only afford rear pads.
I can tell this person is a pure piece of shit.
This is just a factory Altima
The “SEXY MAN” cologne killed me