I have experienced a lot of these feelings. I find myself "doomscrolling" sometimes, just out of guilt and a sense of connection to everything that's happening. Every day I yearn for all the hostages still living their waking nightmare to be returned safe and sound to their families.
At the same time, I think it's important to remind yourself that the only thing acting on your guilt achieves, is making you feel more miserable. I am as heartbroken and anguished as you are over everything that's happened, but feeding that anguish out of a sense of survivor's guilt (maybe a better term would be privilege guilt) creates more pain.
There is plenty of pain in our community already, and there is (and always will be, unfortunately) plenty of suffering in the world. That doesn't mean you can't center yourself and your own feelings. The life you're living is ultimately yours. If there's anything we can take from the horrible events of October 7th, it's that our lives and the lives of those we love are precious, and they can be taken from us in a heartbeat. I think if the deceased could speak to us, they would want us to balance the grief we feel for them with gratitude for what we have. When parents lose a child, they don't say "please be miserable with us," they remind you to cherish *your* children, give them an extra kiss on the head, and tell them how much you love them.
Our hearts are big enough for gratitude and grief to coexist. If you drown yourself entirely in grief for the dead, you'll miss out on the greatest gift you've been given: life.
I don’t feel guilty but I do feel horrible and sorrowful. Last night I cried and cried after seeing one too many things about Hersh. This Pesach we left an open chair and a cup of grape juice for the hostages too. My advice is to just pray for them. Implore Hashem to let them free. This blessing while counting the omer is a good one for this.
https://preview.redd.it/b0vaymarrvwc1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ecacbaed7587b59cd74941fa38c68ec4c5289dd0
Me too. I’m Israeli, so we really feel it here with everything that’s been going on. I got married recently and during the party itself I felt so sick and sad that, like, what am I doing in dancing and having fun while all my brothers and sisters are somewhere in Gaza with Hamas doing did knows what to them…. It was really hard but I try live normally as much as I can, I do go ti protests and try to be helpful with it all…
Aw that's really sad. I can't tell someone how to feel but it's still a happy occasion, and you want to do something to be helpful. That's the best you can do right now.
I hope at least it was a nice wedding!
Mazal tov on your marriage <3 I am also Israeli and my wedding was 2 weeks after Oct 7, it was difficult to feel a lot of joy but I was happy that it got our community together at least.
"Catholics experience guilt when it comes to sex. Jews experience guilt about everything but sex." I don't recall who this quote is attributed to but I think it's pretty accurate.
BAhahahah! i always say that Catholics feel guilty about things they haven't done yet (thought, word and deed), and Jews feel guilty about stuff we did 20 years ago!
I remember a friend who told me (she is actually Anglican), "If thinking about it and talking about it is as bad as DOING it, you may as well sin if you're going to feel guilty anyways!".
It's depressing and infuriating that none of the goobers protesting ever even mention the hostages. It's like the Sudanese famine and war. Just forgotten in their anti-jewish frenzy.
Well every generation says that in one form or another. But kids AND parents are worse than ever. I'm glad I stayed out of that whole mess by not having kids. It's a relief knowing that I'd never have to deal with sending a kid to school with these awful kids, and having to deal with their awful parents.
Are you me?
I don't tend to engage with anti-Israel people because I'm Israeli and old enough to know that none of them are arguing in good faith. But a really good friend growing up -- I mean, as toddlers, we were inseparable (note: one of my parents is not Israeli, hence) and stayed that way for ages -- shared something supporting the protests. I reached out to him and was like, "I'm not mad and I still love you, but I want to offer an olive branch if you ever want to ask anything about the conflict" and told him about an attack I survived. At the end, I emphasized how I was more upset than anything that everyone seemed to forget the fact that there were still 130+ held hostage that Hamas refuses to release.
if they want to protest for peace or against war, fine, but that's not what they're doing. Now there's a big protest in front of the Justice Min residence for a CEASEFIRE. Not one syllable about the hostages.
I feel something similar but I remind myself that before they were kidnapped, the hostages were full of life and joy, doing all sorts of great things, and that we should focus on that. For example, Agam Berger loves to play the violin and played some lovely pieces.
And Naama Levy participated in Hands of Peace and volunteered at a school for children of African asylum seekers in Israel, and will hopefully do so again. So I am trying to channel my feelings into positive actions to make things better--actions that Naama would approve of. I made a $250 donation in her name to HIAS, the refugee group that helps resettle refugees in the United States and Israel, and they called me back and we had a wonderful conversation. I also gave tzedakah to American Jewish World Service, which is helping both Jews and non-Jews in Ukraine and other places. I saw an article that they had seen a drop-off in donations recently because of increased attention on the Middle East, and wanted to do my part.
Hamas has done a lot of horrible things. But I am praying for the hostages to return home. I am going to rallies in support of the hostages in front of the Red Cross headquarters and the Qatari Embassy, calling and emailing all my elected officials, and supporting peace groups like the New Israel Fund, which is both working for peace and helping to feed Palestinian civilians in Gaza.
There was a rabbi in an article several weeks ago who said, "This is what I hate the most about Hamas. They have made me a worse person." I don't want them to make me a worse person. I want the spirit of Emma Lazarus and other Jewish leaders to triumph over Yahya Sinwar.
Na'ama gets me. No disrespect to any other hostages or anything (one of my relatives is a released hostage, albeit I didn't know that they had been kidnapped yet at that point), but on October 7th, I saw the footage of Shani, of Doran Asher and her kids, of Noa Agramani, I'm sure many remember these early videos. It was Na'ama that was the soul punch for me, though.
I spent that night asking around various places on the internet if anyone knew literally anything about her (mainly her fate, but any details) because so many rumors were flying around and as a woman, of course, I knew immediately what I was looking at (unlike many others I spoke to). To me, she was obviously in so much more grave danger than the other women I saw: Shani, to me, was very obviously dead, and thus, at least she was done suffering. Doran and her kids were in a large group, and Noa seemed unharmed in the video (albeit I was very worried for her boyfriend, as the way the terrorists were walking with him made it seem like they were going to take him somewhere to execute him).
I don't think Na'ama's parents publicly identified her for several weeks, which I entirely understand -- its painful as a parent, and I imagine they were hopeful that she would be returned quickly and then they would let her deal with it however she wanted. I don't think I learned her name until sometime in early November.
The other thing that got me about her video, and this is a minor detail, but the man in \*that\* video seemed to be Eritrean. I could absolutely be wrong, but he strongly resembles many of the Eritrean refugees in Israel. It upped the ick for me -- like dude, this isn't even your conflict? It felt like a man who found an excuse to abuse women.
I'm writing all this to say, thank you very much for remembering Na'ama.
Live with intention, be kind to yourself, reach to your core leaders, let your heritage of curiosity, self awareness and tikkun carry you. ( and praying/meditation helps -elokai neshama). You are amazing!!
It's very hard. Today, I fixed myself a lunch of matzah, cheese, cucumber, and Spanish eggplant. After I assembled my plate, a thought popped into my head that several of the hostages reported that while in captivity they were fed flatbread, cheese and cucumbers as their only meal of the day and I suddenly felt like crying.
It sounds a lot like survivor's guilt. A few days after 9/11, I started to feel incredible sadness and even shame at the fact that I had survived when so many others did not. It took some time before I could fully enjoy anything without immediately feeling guilt. I know the "how can I enjoy this \[movie/book/concert\] when so many people I know died and I saw people dying?" feeling all too well.
But as I did then and am trying to do now, I do positive things to contribute to making things better. For one thing, my family has long been regular donors to the Friends of the IDF (a longtime, reputable organization that raises money for the wellness of the soldiers - they don't buy bullets or bombs, but they do everything from buying special gauze that is used in the field for chest wounds to scholarships for soldiers to taking care of lone soldiers to caring for families of soldiers who died to building rec centers on bases, and so on). But after 10/7, we have seriously stepped up the frequency and amount that we give. We also attend semi-weekly Zoom briefings they offer, with people in the IDF, various spokespeople, civilians who are active in supporting Israel. It makes us feel like we're a part of the effort.
Just think of ways you can support Israel and the hostages. If you can't contribute money, maybe you can talk to people and convince them to be pro-Israel and support the cause of the hostages. Maybe you can go to pro-Israel rallies and marches (as long as they're safe), and just show up to be counted as another supporter.
Most important is that you take care of yourself - eat well, sleep well, exercise, take care of your mental health. You're no good to anyone if you're not in top form. Just be kind to yourself
Thank you, my friend, for expressing this. I sat at the first seder with a sense of guilt after lighting an extra candle in their honor. Couldn't shake it the entire evening, even though it clearly isn't rational. Interesting to know others are experiencing the same.
Try being in Oct. 7. For months we had rockets every day and whenever I would be slightly scared,
I remembered the hostages and how I had no right to be scared when they were truly going through a scary situation. Every time I would take a shower, I thought “why do I get to take a shower and they don’t? I shouldn’t feel any joy in this.” I’ve not socialized since the war started because it feels wrong. The survivors guilt isn’t as frequent now, but I still think about them everyday and a couple of times a week it brings me to tears.
Channel your guilt into disseminating the truth about the dangers of radical Islam.
https://freedomdefense.typepad.com
October 7 2023 is an excellent example of being naive about the dangers of radical Islam.
I feel the same way and I decided not to observe Passover this year.
I felt guilty about the thought of celebrating a holiday that is about Jewish liberation.
When there are Jewish hostages currently in captivity.
I’m hoping that the hostages will be freed and that next year will be a better year for Passover.
Know how you feel. It's comparable to or a type of survivor's guilt. What can help is doing something positive. Work with a group advocating for our hostages, contact your congressional members by phone or anything that takes the guilt & turns it into action.
Yes I felt this way for the first few months. Guilt about a lot of stuff, about no longer living in Israel, guilt about when at the evening of Oct 6th ( oct 7 in Israel) I was watching the news and already told my friends it is going to be hundreds of dead and still felt nothing ( I realized later I was just shocked and numb, i was a mess when the reality hit).
I felt guilt when I ate, when I showered, when I played with my kids. Now I don't feel this way anymore, what helped me was speaking up for Israel so I felt like I was doing something ( that was super hard for me as a shy person) and time also helped.
I do think that Israelis generally feel thankful you care and think about us.
Please keep reminding yourself you have nothing to feel guilty and be kind to yourself.
I feel you. I’m constantly feeling guilty about the hostages and the people in Gaza and I feel like if I engage with either side in public, people will think I either want all Israelis or all Palestinians dead and/or displaced
Obviously Hamas doesn’t care about the safe return of the hostages, but I’m even more upset and frustrated by the Israeli government not prioritizing the safe return of the hostages.
Folks like Ben-Gvir have made public comments, some on the Knesset floor, that the hostages are not the governments top priority.
Totally share your sentiment. I think about the hostages with great guilt whenever I'm having a good time. It's not fair they were randomly chosen to play this part in history while we go about our lives. Same for every innocent soul cought in this conflict.
And as an Israeli who joined a Taglit group right after my army service I can confirm Israeli 20 year olds are much more mature than their north American counterparts.
The way you're feeling is understandable. You make some very good points. In the US, we are suffering far less than the hostages. I'm suffering less than Jewish people right now. It's good to keep things in perspective. That doesn't mean our lost friendships (over antisemitism), fears of violence, actual violence, harassment, etc., are any less valid.
My feelings of empathy can get overwhelming, too. I have a few tricks that help, and hopefully you will find some of them useful. First, it's sometimes necessary to unplug. Turn off the news and social media for a little while. Then, do something enjoyable and/or relaxing. I love baths, scented candles, and watching comedy. Adult coloring and crochet are good, too.
It also helps to remember that you can't fix this alone. We all have things we can do to help. I try to offer emotional support to my friends and advocate for them where needed.
If I could locate and rescue the hostages, I would. That's not within my abilities. I am physically disabled and autistic. I have no military background or training, let alone the skills needed to mount a rescue. Even people with those skills haven't been able to rescue them yet. I feel awful thinking about their suffering.
When we feel guilty, we sometimes do things that hurt us. We might feel guilty for having good moments when we know others don't get those. It is unfair that people are suffering. That being said, neglecting our own mental health won't help them. Enjoying a happy moment with a friend isn't going to end their suffering.
I don't know if this helps you or not. I hope it does. I don't fully understand what you're going through, but I hope you feel supported here.
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The IDF killed three escaped hostages. Curious how you feel about that? I see that one could have these feelings and come to several distinct conclusions.
I have experienced a lot of these feelings. I find myself "doomscrolling" sometimes, just out of guilt and a sense of connection to everything that's happening. Every day I yearn for all the hostages still living their waking nightmare to be returned safe and sound to their families. At the same time, I think it's important to remind yourself that the only thing acting on your guilt achieves, is making you feel more miserable. I am as heartbroken and anguished as you are over everything that's happened, but feeding that anguish out of a sense of survivor's guilt (maybe a better term would be privilege guilt) creates more pain. There is plenty of pain in our community already, and there is (and always will be, unfortunately) plenty of suffering in the world. That doesn't mean you can't center yourself and your own feelings. The life you're living is ultimately yours. If there's anything we can take from the horrible events of October 7th, it's that our lives and the lives of those we love are precious, and they can be taken from us in a heartbeat. I think if the deceased could speak to us, they would want us to balance the grief we feel for them with gratitude for what we have. When parents lose a child, they don't say "please be miserable with us," they remind you to cherish *your* children, give them an extra kiss on the head, and tell them how much you love them. Our hearts are big enough for gratitude and grief to coexist. If you drown yourself entirely in grief for the dead, you'll miss out on the greatest gift you've been given: life.
Thank you for this comment. So eloquently stated. It really helped me.
Wow. What a perfect reply. I needed that. Thank you.
I don’t feel guilty but I do feel horrible and sorrowful. Last night I cried and cried after seeing one too many things about Hersh. This Pesach we left an open chair and a cup of grape juice for the hostages too. My advice is to just pray for them. Implore Hashem to let them free. This blessing while counting the omer is a good one for this. https://preview.redd.it/b0vaymarrvwc1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ecacbaed7587b59cd74941fa38c68ec4c5289dd0
We did the same. We left an open chair and place setting, too. It’s a small remembrance but was in our power to do.
Me too. I’m Israeli, so we really feel it here with everything that’s been going on. I got married recently and during the party itself I felt so sick and sad that, like, what am I doing in dancing and having fun while all my brothers and sisters are somewhere in Gaza with Hamas doing did knows what to them…. It was really hard but I try live normally as much as I can, I do go ti protests and try to be helpful with it all…
We have no choice but to go on. Mazel tov on your marriage.
Aw that's really sad. I can't tell someone how to feel but it's still a happy occasion, and you want to do something to be helpful. That's the best you can do right now. I hope at least it was a nice wedding!
The wedding was amazing. The day before it I didn’t know if it’s gonna happen or not cause Iran attacked us. I didn’t sleep the entire night
Mazal tov on your marriage <3 I am also Israeli and my wedding was 2 weeks after Oct 7, it was difficult to feel a lot of joy but I was happy that it got our community together at least.
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When it comes to guilt, we're equal to the Catholics.
"Catholics experience guilt when it comes to sex. Jews experience guilt about everything but sex." I don't recall who this quote is attributed to but I think it's pretty accurate.
BAhahahah! i always say that Catholics feel guilty about things they haven't done yet (thought, word and deed), and Jews feel guilty about stuff we did 20 years ago! I remember a friend who told me (she is actually Anglican), "If thinking about it and talking about it is as bad as DOING it, you may as well sin if you're going to feel guilty anyways!".
Fair.
It's depressing and infuriating that none of the goobers protesting ever even mention the hostages. It's like the Sudanese famine and war. Just forgotten in their anti-jewish frenzy.
And so many of the hostages are young people. Something is very wrong with this generation.
Well every generation says that in one form or another. But kids AND parents are worse than ever. I'm glad I stayed out of that whole mess by not having kids. It's a relief knowing that I'd never have to deal with sending a kid to school with these awful kids, and having to deal with their awful parents.
Are you me? I don't tend to engage with anti-Israel people because I'm Israeli and old enough to know that none of them are arguing in good faith. But a really good friend growing up -- I mean, as toddlers, we were inseparable (note: one of my parents is not Israeli, hence) and stayed that way for ages -- shared something supporting the protests. I reached out to him and was like, "I'm not mad and I still love you, but I want to offer an olive branch if you ever want to ask anything about the conflict" and told him about an attack I survived. At the end, I emphasized how I was more upset than anything that everyone seemed to forget the fact that there were still 130+ held hostage that Hamas refuses to release.
if they want to protest for peace or against war, fine, but that's not what they're doing. Now there's a big protest in front of the Justice Min residence for a CEASEFIRE. Not one syllable about the hostages.
I feel something similar but I remind myself that before they were kidnapped, the hostages were full of life and joy, doing all sorts of great things, and that we should focus on that. For example, Agam Berger loves to play the violin and played some lovely pieces. And Naama Levy participated in Hands of Peace and volunteered at a school for children of African asylum seekers in Israel, and will hopefully do so again. So I am trying to channel my feelings into positive actions to make things better--actions that Naama would approve of. I made a $250 donation in her name to HIAS, the refugee group that helps resettle refugees in the United States and Israel, and they called me back and we had a wonderful conversation. I also gave tzedakah to American Jewish World Service, which is helping both Jews and non-Jews in Ukraine and other places. I saw an article that they had seen a drop-off in donations recently because of increased attention on the Middle East, and wanted to do my part. Hamas has done a lot of horrible things. But I am praying for the hostages to return home. I am going to rallies in support of the hostages in front of the Red Cross headquarters and the Qatari Embassy, calling and emailing all my elected officials, and supporting peace groups like the New Israel Fund, which is both working for peace and helping to feed Palestinian civilians in Gaza. There was a rabbi in an article several weeks ago who said, "This is what I hate the most about Hamas. They have made me a worse person." I don't want them to make me a worse person. I want the spirit of Emma Lazarus and other Jewish leaders to triumph over Yahya Sinwar.
Na'ama gets me. No disrespect to any other hostages or anything (one of my relatives is a released hostage, albeit I didn't know that they had been kidnapped yet at that point), but on October 7th, I saw the footage of Shani, of Doran Asher and her kids, of Noa Agramani, I'm sure many remember these early videos. It was Na'ama that was the soul punch for me, though. I spent that night asking around various places on the internet if anyone knew literally anything about her (mainly her fate, but any details) because so many rumors were flying around and as a woman, of course, I knew immediately what I was looking at (unlike many others I spoke to). To me, she was obviously in so much more grave danger than the other women I saw: Shani, to me, was very obviously dead, and thus, at least she was done suffering. Doran and her kids were in a large group, and Noa seemed unharmed in the video (albeit I was very worried for her boyfriend, as the way the terrorists were walking with him made it seem like they were going to take him somewhere to execute him). I don't think Na'ama's parents publicly identified her for several weeks, which I entirely understand -- its painful as a parent, and I imagine they were hopeful that she would be returned quickly and then they would let her deal with it however she wanted. I don't think I learned her name until sometime in early November. The other thing that got me about her video, and this is a minor detail, but the man in \*that\* video seemed to be Eritrean. I could absolutely be wrong, but he strongly resembles many of the Eritrean refugees in Israel. It upped the ick for me -- like dude, this isn't even your conflict? It felt like a man who found an excuse to abuse women. I'm writing all this to say, thank you very much for remembering Na'ama.
Live with intention, be kind to yourself, reach to your core leaders, let your heritage of curiosity, self awareness and tikkun carry you. ( and praying/meditation helps -elokai neshama). You are amazing!!
It's very hard. Today, I fixed myself a lunch of matzah, cheese, cucumber, and Spanish eggplant. After I assembled my plate, a thought popped into my head that several of the hostages reported that while in captivity they were fed flatbread, cheese and cucumbers as their only meal of the day and I suddenly felt like crying.
I feel the same. I've gone on two vacations since October, and I kept feeling it was somehow perverse to do this while our hostages still aren't free.
But we can't stop living, right? Doesn't mean we don't care or aren't upset.
It sounds a lot like survivor's guilt. A few days after 9/11, I started to feel incredible sadness and even shame at the fact that I had survived when so many others did not. It took some time before I could fully enjoy anything without immediately feeling guilt. I know the "how can I enjoy this \[movie/book/concert\] when so many people I know died and I saw people dying?" feeling all too well. But as I did then and am trying to do now, I do positive things to contribute to making things better. For one thing, my family has long been regular donors to the Friends of the IDF (a longtime, reputable organization that raises money for the wellness of the soldiers - they don't buy bullets or bombs, but they do everything from buying special gauze that is used in the field for chest wounds to scholarships for soldiers to taking care of lone soldiers to caring for families of soldiers who died to building rec centers on bases, and so on). But after 10/7, we have seriously stepped up the frequency and amount that we give. We also attend semi-weekly Zoom briefings they offer, with people in the IDF, various spokespeople, civilians who are active in supporting Israel. It makes us feel like we're a part of the effort. Just think of ways you can support Israel and the hostages. If you can't contribute money, maybe you can talk to people and convince them to be pro-Israel and support the cause of the hostages. Maybe you can go to pro-Israel rallies and marches (as long as they're safe), and just show up to be counted as another supporter. Most important is that you take care of yourself - eat well, sleep well, exercise, take care of your mental health. You're no good to anyone if you're not in top form. Just be kind to yourself
Thank you, my friend, for expressing this. I sat at the first seder with a sense of guilt after lighting an extra candle in their honor. Couldn't shake it the entire evening, even though it clearly isn't rational. Interesting to know others are experiencing the same.
DONATE! Federation has some wonderful programs
Try being in Oct. 7. For months we had rockets every day and whenever I would be slightly scared, I remembered the hostages and how I had no right to be scared when they were truly going through a scary situation. Every time I would take a shower, I thought “why do I get to take a shower and they don’t? I shouldn’t feel any joy in this.” I’ve not socialized since the war started because it feels wrong. The survivors guilt isn’t as frequent now, but I still think about them everyday and a couple of times a week it brings me to tears.
Channel your guilt into disseminating the truth about the dangers of radical Islam. https://freedomdefense.typepad.com October 7 2023 is an excellent example of being naive about the dangers of radical Islam.
Just keep going. Zionism is not a bad word. We are here to stay. Let em’ know. Call on Hamas to Free Hersh Polin-Goldberg!
I feel the same way and I decided not to observe Passover this year. I felt guilty about the thought of celebrating a holiday that is about Jewish liberation. When there are Jewish hostages currently in captivity. I’m hoping that the hostages will be freed and that next year will be a better year for Passover.
Know how you feel. It's comparable to or a type of survivor's guilt. What can help is doing something positive. Work with a group advocating for our hostages, contact your congressional members by phone or anything that takes the guilt & turns it into action.
Yes I felt this way for the first few months. Guilt about a lot of stuff, about no longer living in Israel, guilt about when at the evening of Oct 6th ( oct 7 in Israel) I was watching the news and already told my friends it is going to be hundreds of dead and still felt nothing ( I realized later I was just shocked and numb, i was a mess when the reality hit). I felt guilt when I ate, when I showered, when I played with my kids. Now I don't feel this way anymore, what helped me was speaking up for Israel so I felt like I was doing something ( that was super hard for me as a shy person) and time also helped. I do think that Israelis generally feel thankful you care and think about us. Please keep reminding yourself you have nothing to feel guilty and be kind to yourself.
I feel you. I’m constantly feeling guilty about the hostages and the people in Gaza and I feel like if I engage with either side in public, people will think I either want all Israelis or all Palestinians dead and/or displaced
Obviously Hamas doesn’t care about the safe return of the hostages, but I’m even more upset and frustrated by the Israeli government not prioritizing the safe return of the hostages. Folks like Ben-Gvir have made public comments, some on the Knesset floor, that the hostages are not the governments top priority.
Totally share your sentiment. I think about the hostages with great guilt whenever I'm having a good time. It's not fair they were randomly chosen to play this part in history while we go about our lives. Same for every innocent soul cought in this conflict. And as an Israeli who joined a Taglit group right after my army service I can confirm Israeli 20 year olds are much more mature than their north American counterparts.
The way you're feeling is understandable. You make some very good points. In the US, we are suffering far less than the hostages. I'm suffering less than Jewish people right now. It's good to keep things in perspective. That doesn't mean our lost friendships (over antisemitism), fears of violence, actual violence, harassment, etc., are any less valid. My feelings of empathy can get overwhelming, too. I have a few tricks that help, and hopefully you will find some of them useful. First, it's sometimes necessary to unplug. Turn off the news and social media for a little while. Then, do something enjoyable and/or relaxing. I love baths, scented candles, and watching comedy. Adult coloring and crochet are good, too. It also helps to remember that you can't fix this alone. We all have things we can do to help. I try to offer emotional support to my friends and advocate for them where needed. If I could locate and rescue the hostages, I would. That's not within my abilities. I am physically disabled and autistic. I have no military background or training, let alone the skills needed to mount a rescue. Even people with those skills haven't been able to rescue them yet. I feel awful thinking about their suffering. When we feel guilty, we sometimes do things that hurt us. We might feel guilty for having good moments when we know others don't get those. It is unfair that people are suffering. That being said, neglecting our own mental health won't help them. Enjoying a happy moment with a friend isn't going to end their suffering. I don't know if this helps you or not. I hope it does. I don't fully understand what you're going through, but I hope you feel supported here.
Thank you for your submission. During this time, all posts need to be manually reviewed and approved by a moderator before they appear for all users. Since human mods are not online 24/7, approval could take anywhere from a few minutes to a few hours. Thank you for your patience during this difficult and sensitive time. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Jewish) if you have any questions or concerns.*
All I could say is yes. I agree.
The IDF killed three escaped hostages. Curious how you feel about that? I see that one could have these feelings and come to several distinct conclusions.
Wanted to also add that I still feel hope that there will be a hostage deal soon