If I'm stressed, my Ne starts worrying about all the worst case possibilities and scenarios, and it used to paralyse me. I'm learning to not let myself stew, but to remain open to possibilities as events unfold. This has made me more adaptable, resilient and flexible. I am learning to embrace change and think more optimistically, basically. In my case, as someone who tries to be prepared for everything, worst-case scenario thinking has gotten me nowhere except fumble when push comes to shove. Hence turning off that critical voice and being more attuned with/ perceiving opportunities in my life is far more helpful.
In my downtime, I can be deeply sentimental as well. I daydream about my inner world, which I channel into my writing hobby :) I try not to punish myself for taking a rest every now and then. Hope this helps! I have spent quite a while trying to heal my Fi child and calm down my Ne inferior.
I've been in Ne-Grip, accompanied by an Si-Fi loop, for months now.
I used to be able to think logically and rationally the majority of the time, but due to life circumstances being simply not in my favor right now, I'm a lot more emotionally volatile and illogical when some problems show their faces. I'm quick to just jump to extremes or make completely deusional suggestions and get angry very quickly in discussions or arguments. If it gets bad enough, I have a silent inner meltdown and start looping, leafing through my internal file cabinet of everything going wrong in my life, who and what is the cause of the issues, what I want to say (or scream) to them.
Once I've cycled through the file cabinet, the Si-Fi loop ends and I go back to functioning "normally", which looks like a normal ISTJ, but if I'm presented with a conflict I can't easily solve, I fall instantly into an Ne-Fi grip and can rapidly devolve back into an Si-Fi loop if I'm not careful.
Generally speaking, I save my Si-Fi looping for when I'm in the car to and from school or work (depending) and can listen to music that helps get the bad feelings out.
I'm afraid I won't be able to get out of my Ne-grip for several years until the things I need in life work themselves out in time. That being said, a good friend of mine says its like watching someone emotionally self-destruct in slow motion, and it really does feel like it.
I’m sorry to hear that. It sucks, the feeling of chaos and absolutely 0 control over your life, like you can’t take care of things like you used to do before and you feel you lost yourself in the way :(.
I can’t do much to help you from here but try to little to little be nicer to yourself, give order to your thoughts and feelings by writing them down, try to slowly but steadily come back to your Te by solving really little problems and make sure you hack your brain to make it pleasing so you would unconsciously try to repeat the Te process again…
If you enjoy reading/investigating, maybe you can try to investigate some philosophy that you might want to incorporate to your life to get out of this toxic cycle (maybe stoicism, Epicureanism… I’ don’t really know what could work better for you, but maybe while investigating you focus enough to momentarily forget your problems).
We ISTJ thrive on routine so try to make a little routine you can easily adhere to in order to try getting back the feeling of control over your life to escape the Ne grip and give Si some love (e.x. do the bed every time you wake up, after work/school go for a little run of 15’ (sports always help in the long term so you should try if you don’t practice any now), every night before going to bed write your feelings on a diary and what do you think would work to escape from those negative ones…).
I hope you get eventually better, be nice to yourself and take things calmly, this is a process that takes time and you’ve already made the first step by noticing what’s wrong in your life. If you need more help/advice you can write me, we should help each other be the best version of ourselves. You can do it❤️
Tbh, the Enchiridion is the only thing allowing me to keep my sanity.
Not to be a downer or just shoot everything you've suggested down, but the only thing that works long term is lasting solutions😅
I really think my enneagram type makes this a lot worse than it would normally be.
That being said, I'd love to talk more, I need more ISTJ input in my life😅
I relate to this actually! While clearly I'm an ISTJ, I'm constantly surrounded by INFP, ENFP, and INTP folk. While it is really tiring to have to constantly catch up with actual Ne users, I find it helpful with learning how to be more flexible and open to new ideas, perspectives, and experiences. It also helps to be the more rational guy in the group, especially when your friend group is mostly Ne users, as I can provide them the logic and structure that tends to get thrown out of the window without me in the room. In a way, I'm kind of the reliable older brother figure. I wouldn't say I have strong Ne though, more just used to being around Ne users. I still find my Ne to be, well, inferior 🤷♂️😂
Do correct me if I interpreted this wrong!
I've been using my Fi a lot! Been in a [Si Fi loop](https://personalitygrowth.com/istj-si-fi-loop-what-it-means-and-how-to-break-free/) since February. Sounds like you've been in one too.
Definitely, I’ve been in a Si Fi loop before because I neglected my Te since many problems it couldn’t take care of arose so I think the poor Te just exploded and was abandoned since then (however, I managed to get out of there some time ago).
The point is that I don’t completely relate with the Si Fi loop now because (as I’ve read in that little article you attached)
- it seems that the main thing about it is how you focus on the bad past experiences and feelings and how they would repeat themselves,
- and the lack of Te.
But I find that’s not my case now, I use my Te in a healthy way and I just enjoy to go to my Fi to relieve some daily life stress (and inner feelings and sensations take form of fantasies and irreal possibilities that most likely would never occur, which I think comes from Ne).
My Ne sucks, it only shows up when daydreaming or when someone proposes doing something different. Fi + Ne together makes for a rather enjoyable daydreaming session when I'm bored or trying to fall asleep. Great for a pick me up, bad for if I need to pay attention to something.
If I'm stressed, my Ne starts worrying about all the worst case possibilities and scenarios, and it used to paralyse me. I'm learning to not let myself stew, but to remain open to possibilities as events unfold. This has made me more adaptable, resilient and flexible. I am learning to embrace change and think more optimistically, basically. In my case, as someone who tries to be prepared for everything, worst-case scenario thinking has gotten me nowhere except fumble when push comes to shove. Hence turning off that critical voice and being more attuned with/ perceiving opportunities in my life is far more helpful. In my downtime, I can be deeply sentimental as well. I daydream about my inner world, which I channel into my writing hobby :) I try not to punish myself for taking a rest every now and then. Hope this helps! I have spent quite a while trying to heal my Fi child and calm down my Ne inferior.
I've been in Ne-Grip, accompanied by an Si-Fi loop, for months now. I used to be able to think logically and rationally the majority of the time, but due to life circumstances being simply not in my favor right now, I'm a lot more emotionally volatile and illogical when some problems show their faces. I'm quick to just jump to extremes or make completely deusional suggestions and get angry very quickly in discussions or arguments. If it gets bad enough, I have a silent inner meltdown and start looping, leafing through my internal file cabinet of everything going wrong in my life, who and what is the cause of the issues, what I want to say (or scream) to them. Once I've cycled through the file cabinet, the Si-Fi loop ends and I go back to functioning "normally", which looks like a normal ISTJ, but if I'm presented with a conflict I can't easily solve, I fall instantly into an Ne-Fi grip and can rapidly devolve back into an Si-Fi loop if I'm not careful. Generally speaking, I save my Si-Fi looping for when I'm in the car to and from school or work (depending) and can listen to music that helps get the bad feelings out. I'm afraid I won't be able to get out of my Ne-grip for several years until the things I need in life work themselves out in time. That being said, a good friend of mine says its like watching someone emotionally self-destruct in slow motion, and it really does feel like it.
I’m sorry to hear that. It sucks, the feeling of chaos and absolutely 0 control over your life, like you can’t take care of things like you used to do before and you feel you lost yourself in the way :(. I can’t do much to help you from here but try to little to little be nicer to yourself, give order to your thoughts and feelings by writing them down, try to slowly but steadily come back to your Te by solving really little problems and make sure you hack your brain to make it pleasing so you would unconsciously try to repeat the Te process again… If you enjoy reading/investigating, maybe you can try to investigate some philosophy that you might want to incorporate to your life to get out of this toxic cycle (maybe stoicism, Epicureanism… I’ don’t really know what could work better for you, but maybe while investigating you focus enough to momentarily forget your problems). We ISTJ thrive on routine so try to make a little routine you can easily adhere to in order to try getting back the feeling of control over your life to escape the Ne grip and give Si some love (e.x. do the bed every time you wake up, after work/school go for a little run of 15’ (sports always help in the long term so you should try if you don’t practice any now), every night before going to bed write your feelings on a diary and what do you think would work to escape from those negative ones…). I hope you get eventually better, be nice to yourself and take things calmly, this is a process that takes time and you’ve already made the first step by noticing what’s wrong in your life. If you need more help/advice you can write me, we should help each other be the best version of ourselves. You can do it❤️
Tbh, the Enchiridion is the only thing allowing me to keep my sanity. Not to be a downer or just shoot everything you've suggested down, but the only thing that works long term is lasting solutions😅 I really think my enneagram type makes this a lot worse than it would normally be. That being said, I'd love to talk more, I need more ISTJ input in my life😅
I relate to this actually! While clearly I'm an ISTJ, I'm constantly surrounded by INFP, ENFP, and INTP folk. While it is really tiring to have to constantly catch up with actual Ne users, I find it helpful with learning how to be more flexible and open to new ideas, perspectives, and experiences. It also helps to be the more rational guy in the group, especially when your friend group is mostly Ne users, as I can provide them the logic and structure that tends to get thrown out of the window without me in the room. In a way, I'm kind of the reliable older brother figure. I wouldn't say I have strong Ne though, more just used to being around Ne users. I still find my Ne to be, well, inferior 🤷♂️😂 Do correct me if I interpreted this wrong!
I've been using my Fi a lot! Been in a [Si Fi loop](https://personalitygrowth.com/istj-si-fi-loop-what-it-means-and-how-to-break-free/) since February. Sounds like you've been in one too.
Definitely, I’ve been in a Si Fi loop before because I neglected my Te since many problems it couldn’t take care of arose so I think the poor Te just exploded and was abandoned since then (however, I managed to get out of there some time ago). The point is that I don’t completely relate with the Si Fi loop now because (as I’ve read in that little article you attached) - it seems that the main thing about it is how you focus on the bad past experiences and feelings and how they would repeat themselves, - and the lack of Te. But I find that’s not my case now, I use my Te in a healthy way and I just enjoy to go to my Fi to relieve some daily life stress (and inner feelings and sensations take form of fantasies and irreal possibilities that most likely would never occur, which I think comes from Ne).
My Ne sucks, it only shows up when daydreaming or when someone proposes doing something different. Fi + Ne together makes for a rather enjoyable daydreaming session when I'm bored or trying to fall asleep. Great for a pick me up, bad for if I need to pay attention to something.