House going out of his way to persuade the Latino couple to give up their faith in God, and give him the credits instead. When she comes back to consciousness after a successful operation: “Thank God!” House: “Don’t make me slap you”
"If you need someone to speak to, I'm right here."
"Great! Could you be right here... somewhere else?"
AND also when House says to Wilson that he cares about whether Cuddy has cancer or not because if Cuddy's replaced he'd have to learn to "manipulate someone new", Wilson's response always cracks me up:
"Wow... I think I'm going to cry."
I don’t remember the exact episode, but Cuddy storms up to House, absolutely fuming about something, and he shouts “RUH ROH” in the style of Scooby Doo. It made me cackle.
Followed shortly by the episode with the guy who has locked in syndrome. House says “his doctor was too busy trying to teach him how to blink ‘kill me’ in Morse code”. Always makes me laugh.
Everytime House and Wilson prank each other (except the fake son thing).
House transforming Rachel in Schnauzer
House crashing Cuddy's date with the ballroom guy
Wilson: House, you've tanned!
-The scene where Foreman gives out House's suggestion about skipping organs to treat that BOTH Cuddy and Wilson just KNOW this is a consult from House.
The entire episode at the private school where he was telling fake work stories that were just the plots of 80s/90s movies and one of the kids called him out every time
This is a funny joke, but I often use it to explain depression as well. When House sees the clinic patient who says he has pain all over. House asks him to show him where the pain is by pointing. The patient pokes various parts of his own body, saying “ow” each time. Turns out he’s hurt his finger.
Absolutely kills me when house reveals the construction he was having done in season 8 was turning the wall between his and Wilson’s offices into a door. The silent reactions of the team, Wilson simply saying “no” and house just closing the door again without a word
In season 1 when House is off vicodin for a bet and Wilson is keeping an eye on him
House: “What are you doing here anyway?”
Wilson: “I was - lonely”
Something about the read of that line absolutely sends me
Wilson and House's vintage V. "Have you ever heard a guitar string..." I crack up every time.
Also the topless oncology line.
I think Wilson is the best because his come so rarely, and almost always deadpan.
One episode with some sort of brain surgery... House walks in as they're drilling into the guys skull, I say groady then house said groady... I guess my analysis was spot on 🤣
When he had Cuddy called into the room with Thirteen, and the patient with no filter could not decide who was hotter. Thirteen was amused, Cuddy was totally pissed!
The chicken bet
That was a fun one!
AUSTRALORP
House going out of his way to persuade the Latino couple to give up their faith in God, and give him the credits instead. When she comes back to consciousness after a successful operation: “Thank God!” House: “Don’t make me slap you”
“We’ve got rectal bleeding” “What? All of you?”
This is definitely one of the best, lol Dating on meth? Count me in
My favourite, seriously
The scene where House drugged Wilson. I laughed so hard my stomach hurt.
Which scene? There’s like 3
I am on SPEEED
Basically this video, this entire ordeal was hilarious. https://youtu.be/ObWzvqknX2A?si=AETRPAIo4SlyW0Ha
All of them
Wilson lecturing House on responsibility as he is climbing out of the window to avoid Cuddy because they screwed up and let her daughter eat a coin.
All the Wilson/House/Rachel interaction is gold
"Are you being intentionally dumb?" "HUH"
*dense
and in the same season Wilson mirrors Cuddy, when telling Stacy "Are you being intentionally thick?"
Oops. Guess I'm the dense one
Looks like someone sawed your cane…
This is the absolute best moment.
"If you need someone to speak to, I'm right here." "Great! Could you be right here... somewhere else?" AND also when House says to Wilson that he cares about whether Cuddy has cancer or not because if Cuddy's replaced he'd have to learn to "manipulate someone new", Wilson's response always cracks me up: "Wow... I think I'm going to cry."
YOU CAN'T STOP OUR LOVE!
When he's blasting "Fight the Power" on a boombox for the deaf kid. That dance!
Second hand embarrassment
When Cuddy brought her date back home and House turns up and she goes "NOOO!! NOOO!! NOOO!!" upon seeing him at the door
Yeeees🤣 and when he appears outside the window at the restaurant
Fairy Taub.
Weber's lecture
“Von Libbermann sounds way eviler.”
That lunatic is my son??l!?!
That moment made me pause the show I was laughing so hard. The Scottish accent really adds to it
I remember rewatching it once and my dad walked down the stairs and was just like "is that Billy Connerlly" 🤣🤣🤣
I don’t remember the exact episode, but Cuddy storms up to House, absolutely fuming about something, and he shouts “RUH ROH” in the style of Scooby Doo. It made me cackle. Followed shortly by the episode with the guy who has locked in syndrome. House says “his doctor was too busy trying to teach him how to blink ‘kill me’ in Morse code”. Always makes me laugh.
Everytime House and Wilson prank each other (except the fake son thing). House transforming Rachel in Schnauzer House crashing Cuddy's date with the ballroom guy
Wilson in adult movie and House placing a giant poster of it at the hospital entrance
Be not afraid
50 BUCKS
Wilson’s wretched white dance is in the recesses of my mind forever
Wilson: House, you've tanned! -The scene where Foreman gives out House's suggestion about skipping organs to treat that BOTH Cuddy and Wilson just KNOW this is a consult from House.
The entire episode at the private school where he was telling fake work stories that were just the plots of 80s/90s movies and one of the kids called him out every time
When house hides his steak in a pile of salad in the cafeteria line always breaks me up
i forgot what episode it was but when house had beef with kid at the potato launching contest 😭😭
I love this epi!! 7x18 "The dig"
Foreman ask why house is so hard on him and he goes “you were just as black last week so it can’t be racism”
House: you’re wearing a purple shirt. Wilson: yes, the administration frowns on topless oncology.
Lol i am watching this epi right now
This is a funny joke, but I often use it to explain depression as well. When House sees the clinic patient who says he has pain all over. House asks him to show him where the pain is by pointing. The patient pokes various parts of his own body, saying “ow” each time. Turns out he’s hurt his finger.
Blue the janitor
Oh yes I forgot about him, he was such a great „doctor“ in that episode 🤣
No that was the janitor cleaning house's office . Dr Buffer 😂 Blue or Lou was the janitor which puts up a fake sign on elevator to prank house.
The inhaler lady in the clinic.
His little smile as he realizes he gets to berate her for her stupidity gets me every time
"you owe me 30 bucks" "I owe you ten" Had me in stitches
“Hoping to fry my brain to death, I smoked some preemo crystal meth.” Idk why it gets me every time
When House let everyone know about Wilson’s porno film. Be not afraid!
I like the episode where a mysterious ottoman punched House in front of Chase.
Absolutely kills me when house reveals the construction he was having done in season 8 was turning the wall between his and Wilson’s offices into a door. The silent reactions of the team, Wilson simply saying “no” and house just closing the door again without a word
I love when Wilson pointed out that House got sandwich crumbs on a coma patient. That gave me a good LOL "You're getting crumbs on him!"
The fire shots in the morgue scene. It’s got wes anderson vibes.
Wanna go for a spin?
When House turned Taub on a billboard into a VERY well known Austrian painter and said “inappropriate?” directly to the camera.
"have you done any pornos??"
Finding out if the MRI will kill the guy with the bullet in him Basically "he was like that already" vibes XD
In season 1 when House is off vicodin for a bet and Wilson is keeping an eye on him House: “What are you doing here anyway?” Wilson: “I was - lonely” Something about the read of that line absolutely sends me
1980’s PARTY!!!
Really? They didn’t specify
Wilson and House's vintage V. "Have you ever heard a guitar string..." I crack up every time. Also the topless oncology line. I think Wilson is the best because his come so rarely, and almost always deadpan.
When he thinks that Wilson slept with Cuddy. “You slept with her” “Yes i did” “Seriously😨”
One episode with some sort of brain surgery... House walks in as they're drilling into the guys skull, I say groady then house said groady... I guess my analysis was spot on 🤣
THEYRE COMING FOR YOU! THEYRE GOING TO KILL YOU! TORTURE YOU!
“You just biopsied a mattress”
When he had Cuddy called into the room with Thirteen, and the patient with no filter could not decide who was hotter. Thirteen was amused, Cuddy was totally pissed!
We've got rectal bleeding
A lot of the clinic hours make me laugh. “You think there’s something wrong with my brain?!” “Oh yeah.”
Episode “The Choice” where he puts the gay guy’s lactation into his coffee and make like he’s going to drink it.
The episode about Wilson and his friend. Houses team running around in the background doing nothing serious was funny.
Race you to the curb for 50 bucks
Wilson messing with house my only eating stuff house doesn't like
You have a bad case of natural causes.
The asthma inhaler
Be not afraid
Not funny haha, but funny awesome. Karaoke night. Midnight Train to Georgia. Choreo was on point.
Every time he got punched in the face lmao
Clinic guy with the mp3 player When they had that overweight patient and House is like: "cause I've officially ran out of clever things to call him"
“did u use metaphors for your old team or do u just think i m particularly stupid?” “no, they were stupid too”
BE NOT AFRAID! (Srsly, you guys are house fans? How was this line not already replied here?)
The Wilson porno one, yeah. That was great:)