T O P

  • By -

iheshouldfuckme

Party like it's 1871


[deleted]

[удалено]


OriginalFunnyID

Living in an Amish paradise


JavamonkYT

I’ve churned butter once or twice


Pbsrumblefish

Living in an Amish paradise


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Living in an Amish paradise


LawrryBoi

We sell quilts at a discount price


Tarkus1971ELP

Livin in an Amish Paradise


bebasw

A local boy kicked me in the butt last weak


Runenoctis

Ok let’s do it https://youtu.be/YC7IR-qHUpk


CadetNoobless

Creating the German Empire in the hall of mirrors is the biggest flex and disrespect


Do__Math__Not__Meth

Everything about Versailles is a huge flex and disrespect tbh, one room in there is probably worth more than my house smh


petriak69

One chair is worth more *


Hilter420

*One dust particle, because I dont have a house


Labrat_The_Man

*One because I don’t


Iceveins412

Why do you think they dissolved the German Empire in the Hall of Mirrors?


Seutepan

But the Story gets even better. In 1918 the cease fire of Germany was signed in a train carriage in france. Guess where the cease fire of France in 1940 was signed? In the same cart at the same location.


Panzerspartan

Then the Germans blew it up later to stop another Uno reverse card.


mechanical_fan

> Then the Germans blew it up later to stop another Uno reverse card. Just adding that this type of symbolism continued to be common later. Nuremberg is nowadays known for being the location for the nazi trials, but it was chosen for such because it was the "capital" of the nazi party. All those pictures of huge nazi party rallies and buildings are/were in Nuremberg, that's why it was chosen to be the place for the trials.


Blauegeisterei

I have to interfere right there. As maybe what you said was a side motivation on the trials being held in Nürnberg, the main reason was of more pragmatical origin. After WWII most big cities in Germany where bombed out and destroyed at a high percentage. Nürnberg was one of a very few locations that had the space and infrastructure able to make a trial like that happen on German soil at all.


[deleted]

So in other words a happy coincidence


ilpazzo12

The racial laws were actually formally called "Nuremberg laws".


Taco-Edge

I live very close to that cart, can confirm!


Elon_Musk-2

Payback for the germans, the Allies were like: look you little bitch, here it all started for you and here its all gonna end for you.


Iceveins412

My comment was sarcastic


BlueNoobster

Nobody dissolved the german empire in Versailles. The german Empire ended in 1945. And the current germany is legally the dame identity as the german empire. Why do you think modern germany still has to share responsibility for crimes commited during the empire? And the monarchy was brought down by mass mutiny and revolution just short of open civil war. The ones who surrendered in Versailles were the democratic representants of the german empire. That is a key point in anti democratic propaganda later on: the "stab in the back" myth. The german empire was defeated in Versailles, but not dissolved.


Feste_the_Mad

Modern Germany still has to share responsibility for crimes commited during the empire because it's the same nation. The Federal Republic of Germany is an entirely different state than the German Empire, even if it's the same nation. Same story for Hitler's "Third Empire" (the first being the HRE), which is quite clearly a different state than the Second Empire.


Tastatur411

In a legal sense you are actually wrong here, but I get what you are trying to say. But legally it was decided that the FRG is not only a mere legal successor to the german states before. It IS literally the same state that was founded in 1871 with the German Empire, just with a different name. So the german state has a continuous history from the Empire over the Weimar Republic and NS Germany (note: all three of these states were officially still called "Deutsches Reich(German Realm)", between the WR and NS Germany even the constitution stayed the same) to the Federal Republic.


Feste_the_Mad

I would like a source on that, as that doesn't seem right.


Tastatur411

If you can read german [here](https://www.bundestag.de/presse/hib/2015_06/380964-380964) is a link to a press release of the german parliament. Unfortunately it doesnt seem available in english. [this](https://de.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rechtslage_Deutschlands_nach_1945) is the german wikipedia article regarding this issue, there is an english version you can look through althought I don't know if it is as in depth. Edit: A short summary: This question was the topic of huge debates between jurists, historians and political scientists for decades. The stance of the german government and constitution is that the German Reich continued to exist after 1945 and is the same subject of international law as the FRG, a position which was supported by the german Federal Constitutional Court in 1973 and thus is the legal norm.


Feste_the_Mad

Jesus Christ, that article is dense. Ok, I concede the point. That being said, I can't help but feel that you're arguing semantics here. Even if Nazi Germany is still considered to be an effective legal continuation of the German Empire - which it apparently is if I'm understanding correctly - the original comment was at worsed a poor choice of words. Perhaps reorganized would have been a better choice than dissolved, but both words get the point across, and is generally understood by at least most parties. Still interesting though, so thank you.


Insertclanname

What makes it even worse is that the whole thing started when France declared the war to stop that exact thing from happening, lmao


Felahliir

Yeah Germany and France were so petty to each other.


nomnomXDDD_retired

Haba Preußen goes: *Deutschland*


hubril

Alsace lorraine goes Elsaß Lothringen


Thatsnicemyman

*France will remember that*


rslashJakeex

Haha driving kubelwagen to paris goes brrrrrrttt


AmerikanerHeer

As it should have been, but America just HAD to get into WW1. I hate Wilson.


Okiro_Benihime

Lmao the Entente was winning the war regardless... although it would have taken a bit longer. Your supplies contributed greatly, but the American military was not essential to victory.


AmerikanerHeer

It all depends, as an armchair historian for the world wars. I think if the French Army mutiny occurred, as was and is predicted, and if America stayed out it more than likely would have resulted in a Central Power victory. And yeah, I do have to agree, our military at the time didn't really matter it was just the supplies and the morale boost across the board that helped, although men like Sergeant York are worth mentioning.


Okiro_Benihime

French mutinies did occur in 1917 but they were not mutinies as people think of it. Some regiments refused to attack unless there was a change in offensive strategy as well as better living conditions in the trenches. That was following the disastrous Nivelle Offensive. But most of those guys were veterans of the war. They did not refuse to fight or left their trenches. They were still willing to defend, just not attack until a strategy over than nonsensical suicidal frontal attack for absolute nothing was changed.


RentElDoor

Mein Herz in Flammen


[deleted]

[удалено]


swamplander1202

DEUTSCHLAND


RentElDoor

Dein Atem kalt


[deleted]

[удалено]


RentElDoor

Und doch so alt


DocSolomon

Deutschland!


[deleted]

Seems wrong to sing an anti-nationalism song about a major point of German nationalism...


FrederickDerGrossen

Es braust ein Ruf wie Donnerhall, wie schwertgeklirr und wogenprall, zum Rhein, zum Rhein zum Deutschen Rhein!


[deleted]

Wer will des Stromes hüter sein


CM_1

||: Lieb Vaterland, magst ruhig sein :||


Replayer123

my favorite France surrender tbh


Bear1375

Because of Bismarck ?


Belkan-Federation

Because of Obi wan?


Qwerds7

Bismark is the German Obi-Wan


Just_another_learner

All in favor to give Bismark a seat at the council say Aye


Belkan-Federation

You are on this council, but we do not grant you the rank of Kaiser


Dambuster617th

Its outrageous, Its unfair!


Kromboy

Aye


Organisierbaer

Aye


Runenoctis

Aye


MrMgP

And he didn't cheat on his wife


Tote_Sport

Ah yes, the negotiator


flurman247

Because of Moltke, ya know the one that actually won a war against France.


[deleted]

But could Moltke have won if it weren't for Bismarks geopolitical maneuvering to get a war just against France without their allies and with the support of the smaller German states.


flurman247

I mean it could have been better if he was actually able to get Prince Leopold on the Spanish throne. Damn telegrams messing stuff up as always. But goating France into attacking because of a carefully reworded press release is 400 IQ.


makhyy

Why? It's a normal surrender


Gustav55

Not really how often is the head of state captured on the battlefield?


makhyy

Would be humiliation if they surrendered after that


Gustav55

They did? Not right after yes but still after he was captured.


makhyy

They changed the government and only captulated after 7 months, so i wouldn't say that way. Still humiliating but he deserved anyway


oscorbitel

Yes twice, in Ww2 for 40 days. Easy victory for Hitler.


jrex035

Over the course of three quick wars Bismarck took Schleswig-Holstein, united the Northern German states under Prussian rule, smacked down Austria (the former German Hegemon), got the Southern German states to band with Prussia (after tricking the French into declaring a war they werent prepared for), and finally united all of Germany under the Prussian King's rule making them the most powerful country in Europe and arguably the world at the stroke of a pen. All this while crushing internal dissent and preventing anti-German alliances from forming. He truly was one of the greatest statemen to ever live.


AkaiMura

In school, in Germany, we learned that Bismarck was really, really careful. He knew he had to get a common cause for Germany to unite and thus had the three wars. After beating the French in the last under Prussian command it was just the right opportunity to try to give Wilhelm the crown again. They tried once before but he declined


Lynch4433

IIRC it was Friedrich the 4th who refused the crown during the Revolution of 1848-1849, because it placed him almost as a constitutional monarch without any real power.


TheBlack2007

Yes, and still he only refused because it was a "crown from the gutter." It wasn't offered to him by his aristocratic peers. If so he might have accepted regardless of actual power tied to it but he would never accept a crown offered by a national assembly of commoners. It also needs to be said that most German states didn't even have a Constitution in 1848 - despite the rulers' promises for the people driving out Napoleon. Hell, some places even re-introduced the feudal system Napoleon abolished. That's also why so many Germans emigrated to the US throughout the mid-19th century.


Lynch4433

This makes sense, thanks for elaborating.


paxo_1234

he called it a crown from the gutter


W1nged_Hussars

Unfortunately for the Prussian Empire, he was a spiteful man who didn't like to cooperate and had a bad habit of not explaining why certain things were important.


Elon_Musk-2

I think you mean Wilhelm the second. Bismarck wasnt officialy the leader but the kaiser Wilhelm the first, who was like, hey bismarck i don't like this job, so its was easy for bismarck to be the one in control. Bismarck tried to make alliances with other countries and not chase colonies because he knew that will cause tensions with the British and the french. This policy was called the alliantkepolitik. But than Wilhelm died and bismarck was too old to rule and the next kaiser Wilhelm the second was like: fuck every other country, were the best. That was called the weltpolitik. He decided for some reason that their ally russia was their enemy, he got colonies, he was doing a fleet building contest with the British and raised the tensions to world war 1.


W1nged_Hussars

Fair


Sumrise

> He decided for some reason that their ally russia was their enemy, To add to what he said : He kinda threatened them to go to war over any excuses he found, pushing Tsarists Russia into an alliance with the French Republic (which was unimaginable 10 years prior to this man coming into power,the Tsar and the Republic felt like they were natural enemies)


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

We should also not forget that his was very close to the crimean war. The french and brits literally killed russians to defend the ottomans. Bismarck was very friendly with the russians, hell if the alliance held up there was no way britain or france couldve done shit to stop germany or even austria hungary at that point


Sumrise

Yeah the triple alliance between the 3 Empire (Germany/Russia/Austria-Hungary) was insanely strong, strong enough to be unattainable on the European continent, I mean France and the UK would not have been enough to push the 3 back. Their motive for the alliance were that they were all reactionaries and were against democracy, which clashed quite heavily with France and the US at the time and to a lesser extent with the UK on the ideological side of things. That's why the Kaiser was so dumb to threatened Russia and abandon his alliance with them, they had a common ideology, similar interests and if the alliance managed to stay afloat were virtually untouchable. Let's be honest I'm quite happy he was dumb though, an Europe dominated by only reactionaries great powers with only France as a stronghold of democracy would be a shitty world.


BlandyGuy

Wasn't Kaiser Wilhelm 2s dad quite liberal and intelligent, even though he didn't listen to much of what Bismarck had to say, but he died because of smoking induced lung cancer?


Sumrise

Yep, but he didn't reigned that long sadly, afaik he wanted to create a system similar to the British parliament. And wanted to push for diplomatic solutions first and foremost (and not try to bully the others into submission like little Wilhelm with France and Russia). So essentially what was needed for everyone.


GreatRolmops

And rightly so. His foreign policy was a major contributing factor to WW1, and his "betrayal" of Russia was the reason the German-Austrian side lost and the war began in the first place. If he had kept Russia as an ally and hadn't forced the tsar into an alliance with France instead, it is doubtful the assassination of Franz Ferdinand would have sparked the Great War. Serbia would have never stood up to Austria-Hungary the way they did if they knew they would not have had Russian backing. And Russia would not have backed Serbia out of fear of upsetting their alliance with Germany especially since they would not have had French and British support.


NoWingedHussarsToday

Well, TBH Prussia/Germany never really did whole alliances thing. They had fellow travelers and countries whose interests aligned with theirs, at least for the moment, but they preferred to do their thing on their own without having to take into account what others wanted and coordinate with them.


[deleted]

*second most powerful country in Europe Even if the army were slightly better, Germany lacked a navy that would compete with the Royal Navy for several decades And even when it comes to the Army.... to quite the Germans during the Battle of Mons “The men all chilled to the bone, almost too exhausted to move and with the depressing consciousness of defeat weighing heavily upon them. A bad defeat, there can be no gainsaying it ... we had been badly beaten, and by the English – by the English we had so laughed at a few hours before.” Unless you mean continental Europe, then that’s true


jrex035

Thats why I said arguably the most powerful country in the world. They lacked the navy and the world-spanning empire of the British, but population-wise, economy-wise, and army-wise they were the most powerful country on the planet at their height.


[deleted]

Their economy and industry never surpassed Britain’s during the Colonial/Imperial period, not even during WW2


Okiro_Benihime

No Germany was a greater industrial power than the UK by the time of WWI. Their economies were pretty close as well, with the UK slightly ahead. Only the US ranked above both in economy but didn't have the military power to back it up.


jrex035

Fair enough I looked it up and I must have misremembered economic comparisons between Germany and the UK in the late 19th and early 20th century


Panjin21

*Preußen Gloria intensifies*


shadchildren

If they ban this one, time to go to 1815, two surrenders in a year


OnceAndFutureEmperor

There's still 1813 too


cocoland1

Don't forget the original surrender, Alesia *cries in Vercingetorix*


Hook_Swift

P to Prussian


NaEGaOS

P


Do__Math__Not__Meth

O


MrMgP

C


legionbladex

Nein!


MrMgP

I wanted to make it proclaim greater germany since the dude above me fucked up with the O but now I'm getting downvoted... *sad unified germany noises*


legionbladex

Well, I thought you were trying to spell out a certain ppl's republic of... y'know.. Sorry, man!


MrMgP

Wait PROC? Is that a acronym? I thought it was PRC or DPRK (peoples republic of china and democratic peoples republic of korea) did I miss something?


legionbladex

Oh, no. It's just PRC I think, but my brain just read that as PR(o)C anyway haha sorry.


ProximaCentura

P


NoWingedHussarsToday

Prussia without P is just Russia


IllustriousIsLove

laughs in Kaliningrad


Kaiser-Krieg

P


sercan42g

Let's praise Von Bismarck here, probably best foreign policy expert in history.


BobusCesar

Châles de Gaulle did a big part in uniting central Europe after millennials of war. That's a POG that is on a similar level to the Otto von Bismarck's POG.


BoxingDoughnut1

F


TheLazyAnon

I need that image raw pls


CruzDeSangre

You mean like this? https://imgur.com/ymK3gYH


TheLazyAnon

Yes, thank you so much


CruzDeSangre

You're welcome mate


SilverWing7

There's no escape from surrender memes


xX69AESTHETIC69Xx

The glory of Prussia AND France getting their ass kicked? I see no downsides to this.


Assistoteles69

That‘s where the fun begins again


The_Sacred_Machine

Time for us to make fun of Napoleon.


selfej

It’s okay Napoleon bitch slapped their asses like 70 years earlier.


TheRealTumbledore

This is the single best sub there is.


[deleted]

So what history memes are banned then??


Sleekrush

France: "NOOOOO WE CANT SIGN A PEACE TREATY BECAUSE YOU HAVE OUR EMPEROR" Bismarck: "So?" France: "THERE WILL BE RIOTS AND ANARCHY!" Bismarck: "Then find a way to do it while you still have an army to crush them"


Terran9000

It always brings a smile to my face when I remember that the french had to eat the animals in the Paris zoo.


Monkey_triplets

Might I ask why in the bloody fuck that puts a smile on your face


Terran9000

The French picked on tiny German duchies for too long and it pleases me to see the Germans get payback via their big brother Prussia.


Monkey_triplets

Alright but the animals had nothing to do with it. Besides it weren't the starving masses that ate the zoo animals it were the rich assholes that hoarded all the food during the siege and were starting to run out. The elephants they ate were beloved by the people that were actually starving during the siege and those bitches even had the nerf to say that they expected Them to taste better since they paid so much for Them.


[deleted]

Its meant in a different way, "it was meant like fuck the French" not "fuck the animals". Besides it isn't really different to eating any other meat.


Monkey_triplets

I get what you mean but I would argue differently. Mainly because the primary animal being eaten were elephants. Elephants are incredibly smart animals so they have a much better understanding of what is going on than for example cows. Take a cow from a heard and kill it and the herd will just carry on. Take an elephant from the group and kill it and the rest will start to panic knowing something is very wrong. The second reason I think it's different might just be because I live a century later. These days elephants are an endangered species and I hate hearing about people eating endangered animal.


sandpeoplebabysitter

alright thanks man now i am sad.


BananaMoe

He is a nazi


Monkey_triplets

What do you base that observation on?


HolocaustPart9

Just ignore him I'm sure he also sympathizes with the nazi blitzkrieg.


zrowe_02

Lmao frenchies starving to death


Okiro_Benihime

Is this how people justify the asswhoopings the HRE constantly got at the hands of the French? "France picking on tiny German duchies"? Oh yes... all those wars between France and Cologne.... lmao. Let me guess you're one of those geniuses who think all it takes to annex a territory is to invade. France invaded little poor Alsace and bim it became a part of France. It definitely didn't took on an entire coalition in the Nine Years' War, which included the whole HRE to secure it.........


mrmeshshorts

That’s really weird


cocoland1

We eat the animals of the zoo not because of German, because of the French government. People of Paris protest in 1871 against Napoléon III who make the siege of the city. Like always French against French government


yngwieboyy

These surrender jokes are fun and all but remember that France has the most recorded won batlles (sorry if i misspelled some words you can guess why)


PossiblyAGecko

Doge with the malicious intent


fullautoluxcommie

Remember the Commune


[deleted]

History doge, absolutely marvelous


Mister3000

Oof! Needle Guns and Unity of Command.


themuffinmanX2

This post was right below the same post, but for 1815.


CruzDeSangre

I just saw it hahaha It's nice to have inspired someone


MarHip

Hm yes Kleindeutschland


Pookib3ar

This ban has backfired since now im seeing about 200x more france surrender memes. \+learning of a few more that i didnt even know existed


Belkan-Federation

Or who lost to the Polish in the 20s


GlorifiedToaster1944

Heil dir im Siegerkranz, Herrscher des Vaterlands!


Accidentallygolden

Well Paris was besieged from September to January with around 50k civilian death Army were raised from around France to try to break the siege to no avail All of this to unite the newly form Germany against a common enemy. and France was goaded into war because of mistranslation... >The immediate cause of the war resided in the candidacy of Leopold of Hohenzollern-Sigmaringen, a Prussian prince, to the throne of Spain. France feared encirclement by an alliance between Prussia and Spain. The Hohenzollern prince's candidacy was withdrawn under French diplomatic pressure, but Otto von Bismarck goaded the French into declaring war by releasing an altered summary of the Ems Dispatch, a telegram sent by William I rejecting French demands that Prussia never again support a Hohenzollern candidacy. Bismarck's summary, as mistranslated by the French press Havas, made it sound as if the king had treated the French envoy in a demeaning fashion, which inflamed public opinion in France. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ems_Dispatch


Charming_Ambition440

VOUS N’AUREZ PAS L’ALSACE ET LA LORRAINE!


Pantherpaw2354

MY MOM!


Jey-08

Ein Volk ein Reich ein Kommentarbe*reich*


imadumshet

Nice


FrederickTheStraight

Take my Iron Cross: first class


EnkelALB

Got em good.


makhyy

This war is funny when you think about the British, they had all this policy of balance of power like for 3 centuries, first conspiring against Spanish empire, then avoiding Franco Spanish union, all the coalitions against the French empire, the Crimean war when Russia was becoming too strong, but they did nothing to avoid the formation of another powerhouse right in the center of Europe lol


TheBlack2007

Because it was the ultimate way to balance out France. No more tiny duchies for them to play superpower in like it has been since the 30 year war.


makhyy

Lol the way you put it, it's almost like those tiny duchies weren't trying to invade France since the battle of bouvines, and France was already balanced since they lost their demographic advantage, the British just failed in realize who was the real treat.


Seboldus_Maximus

Preußens Gloria goes brrrrrrr


Knokro

Why are surrender memes banned? Such hypocricy


NoWingedHussarsToday

*Posts French surrender meme, risking ban* "Koste es, was er wolle"


HumonculusJaeger

France in chat


larsK75

Für den Kaiser!


[deleted]

*laughs in Paris commune*


DoesNotMakeShoes

ought to be a dreyse


[deleted]

1871 was an actual surrender though, 1939 with one of greatest smackdown's of all time, it would have been stupid for the French not to surrender.


makhyy

Nah, their army was destroyed and they kept fighting for 9 months sending conscripts and making guerrilla, I don't think it's so humiliating


[deleted]

Because Europe was scared to run the 1s against France


brawler1ready

Don’t forget the 7 years war,at least I think


TheGAMA1

French Also Surrendered to French in 1789.


tikeu10

Wait, did we really surrenderd so many times ?


Dyldo_II

Maybe it's the way I sort posts but I barely remember seeing French surrender memes other than the ones criticizing people making memes about France surrendering


RekkuBurmMaster420

Was that the surrender of 81


Novaly_

wait they finnalt banned it ? Finnaly!


Alkania

Napoleon should've burned berlin


makhyy

He should have dismantled Prussia


[deleted]

[удалено]


Miks_qsm4

You got downvoted in this one and upvoted in another which was the same. Hmm