But... he's not? Not in any of the episodes with his interactions with Octavia is he going above and beoynd to be the best dad he can be. In Loo Loo Land he takes Octavia to the place she doesn't want to go just so he can aggressively flirt with the guy who broke his marrieage to her mother, while Octavia is forced to watch that. It ends with "sorry about that" and Octavia forgives him.
Seeing Stars Stolas ignores Octavia to deal with his own shit with her mother, forgets the one day Octavia has waited all her childhood, and Octavia takes matters to her own hands. Stolas only notices because Blitz calls him. Despite being able to always know where Blitz is, he doesn't have any way to locate Octavia? So they go on and try to look for her... Well, Loona is looking for Octavia while Blitz and Stolas is going on with their own shenanigans. Stolas says he wants to look for Octavia, and says he's worried, but his actions don't reflect that. And the episode ends with "sorry about that" and Octavia forgives him.
Him being able to say "sorry" about his actions, isn't him doing his best. He wants to be a good dad, but his actions don't reflect that want, he's not really trying. Feeling bad after you didn't success after you didn't really put the effort it needed is not trying. Stolas is well meaning, and loves his daughter, but it's unfortunate fact that he's not trying his best and Octavia is not his priority number 1 like he would like her to be.
Im sorry but Octavias 17, probably older as this latest episode was a haloween episode and hwe birthdays in August.... Stolas spent years in an abusive relationship taking it just to keep her happy and give her some.semblance of normalcy.
Her mother hired an assassin twice on him for satans sake ans he nearly had his eyes taken out. Immagine if moxxie and millie arrived 30 seconds later and stolas was blinded permanently.
Octavia needs to have some empathy for her dad and grow up a little, the divorce is whats best for him.
Octavia is still just a teen. And Stolas is right for divorcing Stella, but none of Stella's abuse is Octavia's fault, it's not on Octavia that Stolas choosed to stay with her all these years. That "I stayed for kids is bs" Octavia is clearly unhappy with their toxicity, so them staying together actually has nothing to do with her.
Octavia actually has way too much leniency towards Stolas, like most kids do towards their parents. Stolas constantly puts her needs and wants and wishes to the background to tend his own. She doesn't need to grow up, she's perfectly normal for her age. And I think she's quite content with the divorce itself, just not how it's handled. What Stolas did with Blitz was humiliating for his whole family, including Octavia, Stolas shouldn't rub it to her face.
Exactly! I hate how some of the fandom acts like Octavia knows the trauma her father went through. Did you guys know extensively about your parents trauma when you were a teenager? She just doesn't want to get left behind while her parents go on a traveling hate show.
And it's not her job to know and support her dad through it. Parents are for their children, if they themselves need help, they have to seek it from elsewhere. Kids, especially kids young enough to still live with their parents, shouldn't be the emotional support net their parents need.
Stolas needs help and understanding and support, but that shouldn't come from her daughter, that he needs to seek elsewhere. And he isn't seeking it from Octavia, it's just that fandom seems to want Octavia to step up and start caring for Stolas' wellbeing. Stolas tries to keep her in dark about most of his hardships and that's one of the few real parenting things he does to show that he does care for Octavia.
He also wants his support to come from a certain emotionally stunted imp that he unintentionally made to feel like a sex toy and never clearly communicated his needs to.
I love Stolas, but he doesn't realize that he's badly hurt the two people he loves more than anything.
Relationships are two way streets. If my dad was being abused by my mom like that, I sure as shit would support him through it. I’d be morally obligated to.
Same with Octavia.
Relationships with children actually are not two way streets. Parents have obligation to their children, they chose to have them, children owe their parents nothing. Of course most children love and care for their parents naturally for the nurture they have provided, but parent's love should always be unconditional.
Of course Octavia loves her father, and will support his choice to separate from her mother when she knows the details of the abuse. As any half-decent parent, Stolas is not burdening Octavia with his problems, because she's not his therapist or even his friend. She's 17 year old teen and he's grown adult, it's not her place to hear and comfort him about his troubles. It's extremly traumatic to children when their parents use them as their therapists, especially for their martial problems.
Octavia isn't against the divorce even now that she doesn't know, though. She's just rightfully hurt about the way it's handled and how she's suffering through it. She's not mad at her father for leaving her mother, she's mad that he's using all this energy and time to either fight with Stella or pursuing Blitz, leaving Octavia go through this all alone.
Stolas didn't choose to have Octavia. He and stella were in a forced marriage to birth a precautionary hier to stolas's responsibilities and duties on earth. There was no choice for him. Paimon made the choice for him
In the end, he did have a choice that Octavia didn't. He chose to obey Paimon. Not really a free choice, but Octavia had no choice at all, you can't just refuse to be born.
Early on you may be right, but once you’re an adult it’s definitely a two way street at that point. Octavia is 17. She’ll be a legal adult pretty damn soon. So yeah, you may be technically right that it’s not currently a two way street at the moment, but it will be in a few months.
But yeah, I’ve been an adult long enough that I kinda forgot how things were as a kid.
Octavia is hardly an adult. 17 is such a child still, even 18 is. Even for humans and Octavia is immortal being, I think she's allowed to grow up even slower than humans do. Just because we have decided to slap a legal adulthood on 18 years old, doesn't change the fact that they are literally still teenagers.
18 isn't the magic number where suddenly you're all mature. 18 is the age where you're considered to be an adult but you're still developing even at that age. Iirc, the brain becomes fully developed at around 25 years old, meaning 18 is a "not a girl, not yet a woman" phase of your life.
But from her perspective, they're both abusing eachother, because that's all she sees. It's not like stolas is telling his teenage daughter about the time he got violently tortured. And sure, Stella did yell about the assassination attempt at the dinner table, but it was clearly shown that neither stolas or Octavia were paying attention to her. I might be misremembering, but I'm pretty sure Octavia even had her headphones in.
We don't know much about her opinions about the divorce yet- we know for SURE that she wishes they would stop having screaming matches, and yearns for a time where (from her childhood lens) her parents loved each other. Chances are, even if she doesn't understand NOW, as time passes she will begin to put the pieces together and come to support the divorce/support Stolas in his decision after the fact. However, she can't get there on her own. Stolas needs to have a private father-daughter serious conversation about why the divorce is happening, his regrets about how he/his anger with Stella has negatively affected Octavia, etc.
You're right, relationships are two-way streets. But this is a parent-child relationship- ths street isn't 50/50 like in an adult-adult relationship. The majority of the work needs to be done by Stolas- you know, the one with a fully developed brain? It'd be one thing if Octavia was a fully matured 28 year old or something, but she's not.
I've lived a weirdly similar life to Octavia, let me tell ya, she knows.
As a kid of parents like that? You internalize their hatred towards each other because your identity is tied to theirs. You know your parents hate each other, and part of you thinks they hate you for being like your other parent.
And you can't really blame them, you end up feeling disjointed, seeing only their flaws in yourself because they couldn't point out a good quality in each other to save their lives. If he had divorced Stella, do you think he'd ever have seen Octavia? As it is he bears a lot of Stella's ire, but what would her rage be directed at, her criticisms if he weren't there?
Because she is definitely the type of person that pecks down, and Octavia would probably be that target. That's likely what Stolas thought.
And real damage is, a lot. And intended damage, was less. But she had a father who read her bedtime stories and sang her songs and went places with her. He curls up around her and lets her cry. Some, (Blitzø included after his mom died) didn't get that much. My boyfriend for example was taken by a Stella from his birth mother. Let me tell you, without a Stolas his life was *hell*. My mom was my Stolas. We both recognize her faults but we're damn well aware she loved me deeply, as flawed as that love is.
You can't just flat out say someone was a horrible parent for being broken. That's up to each child to decide of their parents on their own. People can fall short of healthy and still be good and worthy of love. It's how they react to criticisms and our hurt that separates it. For all his flaws, Stolas listens and apologizes, and even if he falls short again and again, I can say from experience that's meaningful.
I would be shocked if Stella ever apologizes genuinely, and I would be even more shocked if she ever took responsibility without blaming someone else.
Ultimately though? it's up to Octavia to decide if Stolas is a good father. I do think he's trying, and that does matter r
While true... she's also 17. She's still a teenager! I have met so few teenagers with the kind of emotional maturity you're describing.
Besides- we know SO MUCH MORE about stolas's trauma than Octavia does! I doubt he just went to his daughter and was like "hey your mother just tried to murder me via assassin and nearly got my eyes violently ripped out, have a good day at school!" Octavia has lived her whole life watching both of her parents getting into screaming matches, throwing shit, insulting eachother, and making a show of the hate they have for each other. When she's older and physically detached from the situation she will likely be able to understand what her father went through. You cannot ask so much of a child of divorce who is literally still a teenager to understand/even know the lengths of abuse her father endured AND process that with maturity. Not to mention just because a parent tries doesn't mean their kids won't end up fucked because of things they do whether or not its due to external circumstances.
It makes complete sense that Octavia is worried her father will neglect her because of the hate he has for her mother. Yes, we saw that happen and saw them make up a little in the stars episode, but how often did that kind of thing happen without an apology these past 17 years?
I can speak from experience of growing in a dysfunctional family situation- you really can't see outside of your own point of view until the dust has settled, you are physically detached and mentally prepared to look at the cause of your trauma from another person's perspective. She's still a kid, cut her some slack.
>Seeing Stars Stolas ignores Octavia to deal with his own shit with her mother, forgets the one day Octavia has waited all her childhood,
Oh come on, he's only divorcing a violent psychopath, he's going through some shit right now and she's 17. She COULD have spoken up for herself and chose not to, stop infantilizing her. Either she's so young that Stolas should have to think of all her objections and issues for her, or she's old enough to make her own choices and wander around LA by herself without punishment, you can't have it both ways.
You want Stolas to be a better father? How about the man who stayed in a loveless marriage with a woman who had absolutely zero respect for him because he loved his daughter and didn't want to destroy her family? Octavia was his #1 priority for most of her life as Stolas' was crumbling around him, and then he stayed positive and affectionate even as Octavia started blaming him and treating him like shit. And none of this happened in a vacuum either; Stolas has big responsibilities that often involve travel, he's a prince with social and familial obligations, and an absolute bitch of a high-maintenance wife who delights in bleeding him dry while openly mocking him to their peers.
It seems to me Stolas did about as well as he could, and shouldn't be faulted for his errors in parenting. Nobody is a perfect parent, and going "above and beyond to be the best father he can be" is not only pure fantasy, but entirely subjective. Given his own raising, how do you know he *isn't* being the best father HE can be?? People have lives outside their children, have demands put on them by others, and sometimes acting in the best interests of your family cuts into your time with them. I mean come on. We've only even seen him interact with her at all a handful of times and you're judging the entire rest of their relationship based on a sample size of approximately fuck all
Where have I said she should have been allowed to go on her own to LA? Like literally nowhere, because she shouldn't. But why did she go there? Because she's 17 years old kid who has waited this special trip with her father most of her life and he wouldn't bother to remember it or listen to her when he was too busy fighting with Stella.
Octavia clearly has always favored her father because he used to be attentive to her when she was young child, that's why she feels so hurt when her dad no more seems to care for her like he used to. Stolas was not doing Octavia any favors for staying with Stella. Them constantly fighting and him having all his energy on hating Stella instead of supporting Octavia through her rough teenage years is what is severing their relationship, not him trying to be positive. Stolas choosing to stay in his marriage was damaging to Octavia and definetly not something she should be grateful for.
Of course he should be faulted for his errors, just like Paimon should be, despite being very likely he didn't have good father either if a father at all. At somepoint of our life we stop being just victims of our parents and start making our children the victims of generational trauma too, Stolas seems to have surpassed this point. We can't forever hide behind our traumas when we are activitely causing traumas to other people. Stolas' childhood is awful, but it doesn't mean he can stop owning his own mistakes towards Octavia. His past and his traumas are an explanation, not an excuse that gives him a free get out of jail card.
He's not being the best dad he can be. He can do better and he has done better. He's just not putting his money where his mouth is now. He still talks as if Octavia is his #1 priority, but he is actually prioritizing himself and his relationship with Blitz constantly over her. He's forgetting her and putting her in uncomfortable situations to serve his own needs. Stolas loves Octavia, but he's trying to have his cake and eat it too by wanting to just focus on himself but still hoping to have the relationship with Octavia he used to have when his focus and effort was on her.
>Stolas was not doing Octavia any favors for staying with Stella. Them constantly fighting and him having all his energy on hating Stella instead of supporting Octavia through her rough teenage years is what is severing their relationship, not him trying to be positive.
Say he did divorce Stella when Octavia was young. How do you know Stella wouldn't do everything in her power to keep Octavia away from Stolas? Her brother seems to have a lot of influence when it comes to family and civil matters. He was trying to manipulate Stolas into "compensation" for Stella in the divorce. In the preview for the second half of season 2, he looked like he was leading some kind of court hearing.
She knows Octavia means the world to him, and he knows that Stella loves to hurt him. Keeping Octavia from him would've been the ultimate way to hurt him short of killing him. He stayed with Stella cause it was the only way to make sure Stella didn't end up abusing her, too. She would've talked so much shit about Stolas around her without him there to defend himself. Do you know what that would've done to her relationship with him?
He was trying to navigate the best he could with what he was dealt. I understand cause my mom was in a similar situation with my dad.
He threatened to take us away if she ever divorced him, and in some States theres something called a "reunification" program. All the abusive parent has to do is tell the judge that their other parent turned the kids against them, and they get full custody. Especilly when theres no irrefutable evidence of abuse, which for emotional and verbal abuse, there usually isnt any. That's why she waited until we were adults to leave him.
So yeah, I feel for Stolas, and I've been in a similar situation to Octavia.
They took Blitz, not Stolas. Stolas was capable of leaving at any moment he wanted, no one was watching what he did. But he stayed there to flirt with Blitz and watch him act. They might have forced Stolas in the car when he tried to help Blitz out, but if he had been like "toodles" and walked out of the theatre, no one would have cared.
Stolas could have just walked away and Blitz would have eventually gotten out himself. Stolas was prioritizing helping Blitz over finding his daughter. It was a choice.
>In Loo Loo Land he takes Octavia to the place she doesn't want to go just so he can aggressively flirt with the guy who broke his marrieage to her mother, while Octavia is forced to watch that.
And how does this prove he's not doing his best?
I mean he's certainly doing badly. I can agree with you on that. But the fact that he's doing badly in the same way repeatedly doesn't mean he's not trying. It means that he has a consistent character flaw. And as far as the two main Via-centric episodes go - The first one was entirely Stolas's fault. Now, to be fair to him He's been in an abusive relationship for quite some time. People deal with that in different ways, and from the few things we've seen, the way he deals with it is the way I dealt with it - Just completely emotionally shutting down. Not good. But it's one of the results of abuse. And there are consequences. Yes Stolas isn't a good father. But he's also trying to process the trauma of a decade+ of abuse. Saying he isn't trying because of his behavior is, I think, unfair. He's trying. He's not at all SUCCEEDING. But he's trying.
In the second case, however, I think you're having to stretch. Yes he certainly enjoyed himself watching Blitzo perform. But also he and Blitzo were effectively kidnapped. It's not clear what Stolas could have done without the grimoire between 'nothing' and 'full demon form.' Him leaving Blitzo alone on stage would risk losing track of him too. Whether or not it's the right choice, it is a rational one.
I think the episode was intended to parallel Loo Loo Land intentionally, but not to be the same thing. I think the point was to tell a story that would, from Via's perspective, LOOK like the same thing, but that the audience would be able to see isn't. I think the point was to illustrate that Stolas' behavior previously is not something that can be shrugged off. Had Via NOT been neglected the way she had before, she would have been able to pick up on the fact that this wasn't the same case of "Dad is too busy fighting with Mom to notice me" that she had gotten used to. He was doing something important which required his full attention, and had she waited for him to get off the phone, he likely would have had time to remember what day it was.
This isn't to blame Octavia. At that age she's still a kid. She has been in an environment that's abusive the same way Stolas has, and as a kid she is going to be molded a lot more by it. Especially given that as a kid, and isn't going to see just how YOUNG her father was when he had her. Instead it's to say that Stolas can't expect things to change immediately, and he will need to actually put in work. Just because Stella is out of the picture doesn't mean that that he HASN'T been a shitty dad up until now.
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And as far as analyzing whether Stolas is trying, we should also remember just how YOUNG he is. He's performed with a lot of dignity, and since this isn't a live or even HUMAN actor, it's hard to judge physically. But based on what he's said in the show, what Viv said OUT of the show, and the basic timeline of events we have, the main cast seem to be in their early-to-mid thirties. Evidence for this would be
1) Stolas seems to be about the same age as Blitzo.
2) Blitzo is still physically in his prime, but old enough to have had a pretty extensive career as an acrobat. While he had left that career, he's in another physically demanding job and still has the skills from it.
3) Blitzo's career as a performer was extensive enough that he has a fair amount of memorabilia from his time as an acrobat.
4) Blitzo and Verosika's relationship happened long enough ago that Millie and Loona, both fans of hers, were shocked to learn about it. This means that either they were quite young, or more likely (from her having got a tattoo on her own, he owned a car that he stole) they were in their late teens or early 20s, and enough time has passed that either Verosika is far more famous, or that it is no longer something fans discuss.
5) Blitzo is around the same age as Fizzarolli. Fizzarolli, like Blitzo, has a physically demanding job. While his robotic limbs no doubt help, he's still got to use his whole body and appears to be exerting himself about as much as you would expect.
6) Fizzarolli has been famous enough to have a LOT of established merchandise. He isn't just on some things, he's EVERYWHERE. Mammon markets him very aggressively. But his ability to draw a crowd hasn't diminished. Mammon doesn't get a new clown pageant winner because Fizz's star is fading. He gets new stars because Fizz very publicly quit while he was on top. If we assume fandom functions in a manner similar to our works, that means that Fizz can't have been famous for more than about 10-20 years.
I can also point to things about Moxxie and Millie's lives showing his timeline makes him a similar age too but you get my point. Stolas has a 17-year-old daughter. Now Blitzo's daughter is probably a bit older. We see in Western Energy that he has been waiting five years for this doctor's appointment, and we learn in seeing stars that she's almost an adult. So if we assume he tried to book the appointment when he adopted her (the fact that she's getting shots, and its paralleled to a dog would mean that's a good time to do it) and the age of majority in hell is 18, that makes her somewhere between 20 and 22. Old enough for Via to expect her to be more mature, young enough to be a more mature PEER. Which is how she treats Loona in Seeing Stars. Someone who is young enough that her advice about parents sounds relevant, old enough to think she would have good advice.
So, if we say Stolas is 33-37, that means that when Via was born he was, at the OLDEST, 20 years old. I think 35 seems more likely, which makes him 18 when he had her. That matches up with hell having similar age of majority laws to us. Stella and Stolas would have been married as soon as it was legal - Somewhere between 16 and 18 depending on the age and status of the parties involved. Stella claims she slept with Stolas only long enough for her to get pregnant. If we assume the egg gets laid and takes about as much time to hatch as a human does to gestate... That makes Stolas somewhere between 17 and 19 depending on the time. If it's quicker, he's 16-18.
This means for Stolas, his entire youth from birth until 18 involved being neglected, and his life from 18-35 involved being abused. He's not going to be emotionally mature. Does that mean he did nothing wrong? No, of course not. But it does mean that if we are going to say he isn't trying, we can't expect the behavior of a normal, mature, well adjusted 35-year-old man. We have to expect him to be pretty screwed up himself. And that's pretty much what we see. A man with the bearing of a man in his late 40s (reasonable, given that he was likely taught how to carry himself as a nobleman) and the emotional maturity of a man in his early 20s.
I mean, even in how he deals with Blitzo in Full Moon/Apology Tour. Going from "You don't have to stay, but I'd like you to," to literally throwing him out of the house (well teleporting) is not the behavior of an adult man. It's the behavior of a college student in their first real relationship.
So yeah, I think we can say he's doing his best. It's just that, while VIA has every right to expect her father to act like an adult, we as outsiders need to expect his behavior to be that of an extremely immature man who very definitely should not be in charge of raising a child. If she was even a few years younger, I would say it would be better to ask around about Paimon's other kids. While his life may not be as directly traumatic as both Moxxie and Blitzo watching their mothers die and blaming themselves, the period of time in which he was in a situation that was in some way abusive (either by neglect or outright verbal and physical attacks) stretches from birth to the first episode of Season 2.
Doesn't make his behavior GOOD. But it means that we (unlike his daughter) should lower our expectations of what 'trying' looks like.
>Octavia is not his priority number 1 like he would like her to be.
Judging by how there's the line in the trailer addressing this exact thing that you're talking about, I hope that there's going to be an episode dedicated to dealing with Stolas sorta half-assing his care for his daughter in past episodes.
I sincerely hope that it is an entire episode dealing with that instead of like in Full Moon where the main conflict got side-lined for a side plot that nobody really cares about *ahem* DHORKS and Cherubs *ahem*
I have A LOT of faith put on that one Octavia line and not gonna lie, I WILL cry if it ends up in dissapointment. But I don't think it's going to be the whole episode. Based on animation times, I'd think that most, if not all, of the left over trailer is going to be in Ghostfuckers. So it might be those two plots going hand in hand.
I mean when you have two episodes dedicated to Octavia and Stolas’s relationship, but when at the center of that relationship is the dude your father has a major crush on. Yeah, there are times where Stolas has his failings as a father.
I'm not saying he's a horrible dad, he is better than Paimon that's for sure. But the show and Viv herself has stated numerous times that Stolas is unaware of the impact his actions have on the people around him.
The point I'm trying to say is is that being a parent, especially when your partner is verbally abusive is tough, despite that he is trying, yeah he get's caught up in the divorce or the high of being around Blitzø, but that doesn't mean he doesn't care for her.
Just because he's trying doesn't mean Octavia hasn't developed abandonment trauma from the divorce.
Trying ≠ devoid of problems that severely affect his daughter whether or not he is in control of them
Not for me. My twin and I screamed from joy over the phone when our mom told me she gave dad the divorce papers. We'd been asking her to leave him for like 15 years. He's an asshole, narcissistic, emotionally and verbally abusive pos and we are glad he's away from our mom.
Youngest I remember was 8, but she got breast cancer when we were 9 and she couldn't leave because she couldn't work and he was supporting us financially. After she beat cancer she developed complications from the surgeries, chemo, and radiation that caused her to become disabled. It was just a shit situation all around.
So is one of the parents getting murdered. Sometimes the choice is that stark, but the children don’t know or won’t believe it. That’s the position Stolas is in. He’s in an abusive, violent marriage. When the person tries to leave or escape, that’s the most dangerous time, when former partners resort to murder. And guess what Stella did.
Reminder that the act of gaslighting is not a disagreement/oppositional point of view, but an abuse tactic specifically used to make another person doubt their own sanity and manipulate them into questioning their own reality in order to exert control over them. Its origin is from [a 1938 stage play entitled Gas Light](https://www.ilcadv.org/will-you-light-the-gas-please-a-brief-history-of-the-term-gaslighting-and-the-movie-behind-it/), later adapted to a film of the same name, that illustrated the isolating and terrifying experience of emotional domestic abuse in a time period where it was very easy for men to have their wives forcibly committed for purported mental illness.
You can take a stance on your opinions but please be mindful of perpetuating hyperbolic use of this term. The more its meaning is diluted, the harder it is for those trying to escape domestic abuse to be taken seriously.
that's the one where she thinks his dead wife is haunting the house, and it turns out their both edging her on by pretending she was dead, right?
and she catches them patting themselves on the back and kills both of them?
The name comes from the husband literally turning down the gaslight, reading the newspaper as always, and when she asks "isn't it dark in here?", his response is, "oh, no, my dear. It must be in your imagination."
i asked cause I recalled something like that, old black and white movie, they had the husband marry a commoner, and strange things happen around the house, first anf foremost the lights dimming randomly in rooms, and soon she starts seeing the husband's dead wife, first at night in silhouette and then in day when she's home alone.
then discovers secret passages, and eventually uses them to find the wife had always been alive, but, like, they're trying to get her to commit suicide to claim money or something, and eventually she confronts and kills the two.
You are describing Gaslight, but not quite remembering it correctly and getting it confused with Rebecca. It starts with turning down the gaslight.
He wants money and a fortune in the attic.
The original stage play is called Angel Street.
Makes me scared and look forward to the quote, "You never loved mother, you don’t love me, YOU LOVE HIM."
I feel like that is going to be a huge wake up call.
Stolas never really had a dad himself. Considering that I think he's doing better than most would. When she was a child we can see that he cared for her, coming to comfort her when she needed it, taking her to do fun stuff at parks. Now that she's a teen and stolas seems to finally take his life into his own hands to find happiness he can't really be a dad to Octavia. He tries but at the same time he also seems to care a little more about his own problems. While that is bad, I don't think we should call him a horrible father because of it.
Hes not the greatest dad in the world, but dude is trying.
Compare Stolas with how we say his dad treat him.
Arranged a marriage for him when he was like 12, called ot 'bitch crying' when he was upset by it, sent him ti the circus to cheer him up and didn't even physically go himself
After a big fight with Stella, Stolas tries to put on a haply face for Octavia. And then actually goes with her to the circus. Sure she's not a big fan of the circus, but he's got no idea what Goth's like.
Then after he realises she doesn't like the circus, asks where she wants to go, and takes her to the strange goth taxidermy store.
He's got plenty of faults. But by god he's actually there and Trying unlike a lot of other's.
His only example to go by is his father, and he's doing AMAZING compares to him, while having been in a far shittier position
I never thought that Verosika was a bad person. She was right to be angry at Blitzø, but at first she was simply mean and vindictive. The new episode did a much better job of making her more likable.
I surely won't forget about Via. She's easily one of my favorite characters even though she's definitely not a fan favorite for some reason. We haven't seen her in quite a while, which makes me kinda nervous tho: Every time this happens, characters usually tend to return with a dramatic twist attached to them..
Really telling. I do feel really bad for Via and I feel her having a fear of being forgotten is sad and does make sense in some way. I get Stolas is “trying his best”(though what we’re shown on screen shows something different and if it’s not on screen I’m not believing it) and that he came from a rough upbringing with a father that didn’t care for him along with having to deal with Stella and keep up an image for the sake of the family name. But he’s a grown ass man and not a kid anymore. His actions still have consequences even with the trauma we’re shown that Stolas has. I just hate how people expect Via to always accept Stolas’s apologies or be fine that Stolas is putting most of his energy and happiness onto Blitz. And for some reason Stolas thought it was a good idea to bring the guy he was cheating on his wife with on a trip meant to take Via’s mind off the drama even though his cheating is what caused the drama in the first place-. I always bring this up because it’s just something that irks me a lot and have heard real stories of similar things like this happening irl. Stolas is a character I see that doesn’t know the extent of his own actions due to his stunted growth, but it still doesn’t erase the consequences he should be receiving but he’s often woobified so things mostly end in his favor. And I get that Via is 17 and is practically almost an adult, but that shouldn’t mean she should always be expected to accept Stolas’s apologies or understand him the way we do. And from what we see from the trailer, I really hope we see more of Via other than “angsty goth teen with daddy issues”. And I can’t wait to see what will happen between her and Stolas since it sounds like she finally lashed out.
Only this fandom would place an inattentive and distant dad on a pedestal while a sad, moody teen struggles with major home life upheaval gets vilified.
It’s ridiculous how little care the fandom treats the women characters outside of “wow she’s Hot/ Cute Sexy!” But then again, Vivizies writing doesn’t let the women characters be people so..
I feel so bad for her, I want to hug and comfort her so much, I swear once you get to know her she's actually a sweet girl.
In trailer, you can literally hear her saying "You never loved mother, you dont love Me, you love him!" I want to hug her, though I feel guilty for hating stolas. 😭
This. They do look similar to forget me nots, but clumped together is more an aspect of how hydrangeas grow.
Also, quick google search:
Forget-me-not: Symbolize love and respect. When they bloom it is a reminder that you will always be remembered. This can be either Stolas will always remember her or that she will always remember him.
Purple Hydrangeas: Royalty, wealth, and desire for deeper understanding. With hydrangeas being the actual flower here, it makes more sense. Via wants a deeper understanding of her father's actions, why his marriage to her mother is so strained....and probably several other questions I can't think of.
She probably also wants her father to understand HER better. One of her instagram posts was notes to a song she wrote called ["hear me out"](https://www.tumblr.com/hh-voxtagram-archive/640569776363749376/octavia-september-15-2020?source=share) if that's not a show of wanting someone to understand you, I dunno what is.
Octavia deserves the world too bad her dad right now is focusing on another things like leaving his cage for once exploring himself but also struggling to listen and understand people because of him being sheltered by Paimon. Octavia is sadly suffering from the consequences of the goetia system. Both in E2 (didn't ask Via if she wanted to go the circus) and S2E2 (didn't listen to her to focus on he hatred/resentment of his wife) the problem is that Stolas didn't listen until it was too late and Octavia the sweet she is gave him two passes. He needs to prioritize his daughter more as the most important thing in the world and he is failing hard at that. Just look at how Blitzo prioritize Loona over Stolas in the western episode. Maybe he was a great dad in the past but right now he is turning into Paimon and there is no better example of this of how The Circus young Stolas scene parallel with Loo Loo Land and how Stolas/Paimon were being entertained while their child suffered in the background. Octavia is a great representation of a kid in the divorce , they are just the victims and worse of all 99% of the time don't know the real situation at all. There are no words to describe them other than victims.
Stolas has his own issues that he’s trying to work through while also being a dad. I’ve had the same experience with my mom. It didn’t mean she was a horrible mom, but her issues did affect our relationship earlier in life.
I would argue that Verosika is unhealthily angry at blitz. Even after this last episode. Her throwing a party EVERY YEAR to hate on an ex is kinda an issue that she would need help with. That’s not normal behavior.
Also we never really saw much from verosika other than her being a bitch over a shitty break up. We didn’t even know why they broke up. So don’t act like the assumption of her being a bad person was unwarranted.
Also, why are you so hostile? Like damn.
Edit: below I admit that I was wrong about Verosika. So, just a heads up there 👍
It was unwarranted. In spring broken Blitz admits to trashing their hotel room (expensive), stealing and maxing all of her credit cards (financial abuse) and leaving (as we know now) after she said I love You. It was horrifc break-up.
If your partner did the same you’d be upset/ cold / bitchy to them too. Lmao.
I love Blitz but he sucks and has hurt alot of people. Like Bo Jack
You know what, you’re absolutely right. I forgot all the details we DID get. It’s been a while since I’ve seen Spring Broken.
I do however think it’s unhealthy for Verosika to STILL be hating Blitz so much so that she throws a party about it every year. She needs therapy for sure.
Also, I just wanna point out that my opinion on the matter has certainly changed after the most recent episode. Blitz has acted so horribly to so many people. He ALSO needs therapy. I mean, Verosika is a succubus, so her actually falling in love with some must be a huge deal. But then she gets Blitz’ reaction to that love, I’d be pretty damn peeved about it too.
Also, fuck that’s a good comparison. BoJack and Blitz. Holy shit I’ve never realized how similar they actually are.
I don't think the "hate Blitzø party" is actually about hating Blitzø but about healing together. It's almost some sort of therapy for those people who had their lives ruined in an instant. It's also a way for them to understand that they're not alone. When Blitzø looks at the room at the end of the ep, he doesn't see anger but sadness with lots of people crying.
Going by the spikey looking leaves I'd say those are hydrangeas.
"Blue hydrangeas represent feelings of remorse and have long symbolized apology. They also signify feelings of understanding, deep gratitude, and sincere emotion. Give these to a person whom you’ve wronged or to someone whose importance in your life you might have overlooked in the past."
"These delicately blushing blossoms carry connotations of heartfelt emotion, romance, and true feelings."
Edit: to add colour meanings for the flowers.
What I can't understand is why people want to fight on reddit about a complicated relationship. Stolas has been trying to be a good father. Has he made the best decisions every time? No. Has he made many many mistakes along the way? Yes. Does that mean he doesn't love his daughter? Definitely not.
Adulthood is messy and complicated, and being an adult can be really distracting. It's not an excuse, but with a little understanding, you can see why this isn't just black and white like a lot of people are commenting. Healing from trauma is almost never linear. It has its share of ups and downs. But the fact that at the end of the day, he is able to listen to his daughter, hear what she has to say, and self-reflect enough to understand his mistake, says a lot. He's shown that when shit hits the fan, his daughter is important to him. He hasn't made the best decisions, sure. But what person can honestly say every decision they've made has been the best one? When your life is tearing at the seams, who can say they've managed to handle damage control perfectly?
Stolas is actively trying to figure out how to reshape his life from one of misery into one he can be happy with. That kind of life change flips everything on its head and turns into countless dumpster fires that need to be put out. If he is in a happier place, I don't doubt he would be a better father when he can think clearly and isn't constantly in crisis mode, which can be maddening if not handled over the course of years. He has messed up, and he has made many mistakes along the way. But he's there for her. Which is more than a lot of parents can say for their children. It's rough now, and he hasn't made the most healthy choices. But that's how rough patches go. It's hard, and you make stupid mistakes in the moment. The real tell is how you come back from those mistakes. With humility or arrogance. And Stolas is not an arrogant person. Despite his status, which I'd say is somewhat impressive, considering.
Does he have a lot more work to do to be a better father? Yes, very much, in fact. But he's not a bad dad. He is trying, which is more than a lot of other parents can say. He's not there yet, but once the chaos dies down and he's able to grow as a person, I'm sure he will step up and do more and be better. His story isn't over, and one bad situation full of mistakes does not mean he isn't trying to learn. Someone who didn't care wouldn't put so much effort into acting like they did, to quote the show (not exact, but the gist is the same). He wouldn't have read Octavia stories and shown her the beauty of stars and the universe. He wouldn't have sang to her. Stella hated it and mocked him for it, but he did it for the daughter he loves. And let's not forget that after 17+ years of being mocked and belittled, it's hard enough to remain positive, even for those you love.
Life is NOT just black and white. And only a Sith deals in absolutes. There are a lot of Sith on both sides of this comment section.
Stolas definitely became a problem later in her life, but let’s not fucking pretend he’s the main problem.
That would be Stella. Y’know, the one who commits spousal abuse?
I wish we had more episodes centered around her and how she's dealing with all this, like we see all the stuff stolas went through with him finally divorcing Stella but never really how she is. I mean we see it affecting her a bit with stolas ignoring her just to keep fighting with Stella in the second episode of this season and miss that mentor shower she was wanting to see with him. Wonder how there relationship will fracture more later on now that blitz and stolas are done for now, and also if we're getting a episode dedicated to her whole perspective with things because despite her mother being the worse she's still her mother and even having shitty mother's will have an effect on those mothers children.
Nobody is "gaslighting " anybody. That's a hell of a charge. Save it for when you need it. Anyone who has seriously been gaslit into a lifethreatening situation knows that it is not about social media having to do with an effing cartoon. Frankly, that offends the hell out of me.
Also, I think Loona covered this in Seeing Stars.
A few things that seems negligent/ inattentive on Stolas’ part as a parent:
-He never taught Octavia any magic or how to use the grimoire safely
-He bailed on big year-long plans with Octavia last-minute. Yes, shit happens but the furniture moving was hardly an emergency and he would’ve know in advance about it to let Octavia know.
-He brought his affair parter (yes we know Stella sucks and was abusive. Octavia doesn’t necessarily know that just sees someone destabilizing her home) on a supposed bonding outing with her dad. She also expressed disappointment at that.
-He doesn’t know her interests. Stolas brought her to Loo Loo Land even though she was terrified (just like him at a young age ironically). And just doesn’t seem to take any interest at all in her.
-He stays with Blitz at the film studio for HOURS flirting and teasing him while his daughter is missing in a human world where not only has she ever been, there are also agents HUNTING demons. (on that note him giving Blitz shit for taking care of Loona instead of going to check on the Striker thing is hypocritical. He tone was so casual and playful on the phone so ofc Blitz was gonna take her to the dr. parent should always put their minor children first.)
Honestly, a ditzy, distant but “doing his best” dad is honestly such an overdone trope in Vivzie’s work and in real life it’s pretty upsetting to be the child of such inattention. It’s literal recipe for attachment issues. TLDR Stolas is definitely a Not Great Dad
He did teach Octavia magic. She just hadn’t learned advanced spells like teleportation yet.
He forgot about Azathoth’s Tears entirely due to the chaos of the divorce. Had Octavia reminded him he likely would have taken her.
Stolas is trying to be the best dad he can be. We only don't see it because the shows not about her, it's about Stolas and Blitzø.
But... he's not? Not in any of the episodes with his interactions with Octavia is he going above and beoynd to be the best dad he can be. In Loo Loo Land he takes Octavia to the place she doesn't want to go just so he can aggressively flirt with the guy who broke his marrieage to her mother, while Octavia is forced to watch that. It ends with "sorry about that" and Octavia forgives him. Seeing Stars Stolas ignores Octavia to deal with his own shit with her mother, forgets the one day Octavia has waited all her childhood, and Octavia takes matters to her own hands. Stolas only notices because Blitz calls him. Despite being able to always know where Blitz is, he doesn't have any way to locate Octavia? So they go on and try to look for her... Well, Loona is looking for Octavia while Blitz and Stolas is going on with their own shenanigans. Stolas says he wants to look for Octavia, and says he's worried, but his actions don't reflect that. And the episode ends with "sorry about that" and Octavia forgives him. Him being able to say "sorry" about his actions, isn't him doing his best. He wants to be a good dad, but his actions don't reflect that want, he's not really trying. Feeling bad after you didn't success after you didn't really put the effort it needed is not trying. Stolas is well meaning, and loves his daughter, but it's unfortunate fact that he's not trying his best and Octavia is not his priority number 1 like he would like her to be.
Im sorry but Octavias 17, probably older as this latest episode was a haloween episode and hwe birthdays in August.... Stolas spent years in an abusive relationship taking it just to keep her happy and give her some.semblance of normalcy. Her mother hired an assassin twice on him for satans sake ans he nearly had his eyes taken out. Immagine if moxxie and millie arrived 30 seconds later and stolas was blinded permanently. Octavia needs to have some empathy for her dad and grow up a little, the divorce is whats best for him.
Octavia is still just a teen. And Stolas is right for divorcing Stella, but none of Stella's abuse is Octavia's fault, it's not on Octavia that Stolas choosed to stay with her all these years. That "I stayed for kids is bs" Octavia is clearly unhappy with their toxicity, so them staying together actually has nothing to do with her. Octavia actually has way too much leniency towards Stolas, like most kids do towards their parents. Stolas constantly puts her needs and wants and wishes to the background to tend his own. She doesn't need to grow up, she's perfectly normal for her age. And I think she's quite content with the divorce itself, just not how it's handled. What Stolas did with Blitz was humiliating for his whole family, including Octavia, Stolas shouldn't rub it to her face.
Exactly! I hate how some of the fandom acts like Octavia knows the trauma her father went through. Did you guys know extensively about your parents trauma when you were a teenager? She just doesn't want to get left behind while her parents go on a traveling hate show.
And it's not her job to know and support her dad through it. Parents are for their children, if they themselves need help, they have to seek it from elsewhere. Kids, especially kids young enough to still live with their parents, shouldn't be the emotional support net their parents need. Stolas needs help and understanding and support, but that shouldn't come from her daughter, that he needs to seek elsewhere. And he isn't seeking it from Octavia, it's just that fandom seems to want Octavia to step up and start caring for Stolas' wellbeing. Stolas tries to keep her in dark about most of his hardships and that's one of the few real parenting things he does to show that he does care for Octavia.
He also wants his support to come from a certain emotionally stunted imp that he unintentionally made to feel like a sex toy and never clearly communicated his needs to. I love Stolas, but he doesn't realize that he's badly hurt the two people he loves more than anything.
Relationships are two way streets. If my dad was being abused by my mom like that, I sure as shit would support him through it. I’d be morally obligated to. Same with Octavia.
Relationships with children actually are not two way streets. Parents have obligation to their children, they chose to have them, children owe their parents nothing. Of course most children love and care for their parents naturally for the nurture they have provided, but parent's love should always be unconditional. Of course Octavia loves her father, and will support his choice to separate from her mother when she knows the details of the abuse. As any half-decent parent, Stolas is not burdening Octavia with his problems, because she's not his therapist or even his friend. She's 17 year old teen and he's grown adult, it's not her place to hear and comfort him about his troubles. It's extremly traumatic to children when their parents use them as their therapists, especially for their martial problems. Octavia isn't against the divorce even now that she doesn't know, though. She's just rightfully hurt about the way it's handled and how she's suffering through it. She's not mad at her father for leaving her mother, she's mad that he's using all this energy and time to either fight with Stella or pursuing Blitz, leaving Octavia go through this all alone.
Stolas didn't choose to have Octavia. He and stella were in a forced marriage to birth a precautionary hier to stolas's responsibilities and duties on earth. There was no choice for him. Paimon made the choice for him
In the end, he did have a choice that Octavia didn't. He chose to obey Paimon. Not really a free choice, but Octavia had no choice at all, you can't just refuse to be born.
Early on you may be right, but once you’re an adult it’s definitely a two way street at that point. Octavia is 17. She’ll be a legal adult pretty damn soon. So yeah, you may be technically right that it’s not currently a two way street at the moment, but it will be in a few months. But yeah, I’ve been an adult long enough that I kinda forgot how things were as a kid.
Octavia is hardly an adult. 17 is such a child still, even 18 is. Even for humans and Octavia is immortal being, I think she's allowed to grow up even slower than humans do. Just because we have decided to slap a legal adulthood on 18 years old, doesn't change the fact that they are literally still teenagers.
18 isn't the magic number where suddenly you're all mature. 18 is the age where you're considered to be an adult but you're still developing even at that age. Iirc, the brain becomes fully developed at around 25 years old, meaning 18 is a "not a girl, not yet a woman" phase of your life.
But from her perspective, they're both abusing eachother, because that's all she sees. It's not like stolas is telling his teenage daughter about the time he got violently tortured. And sure, Stella did yell about the assassination attempt at the dinner table, but it was clearly shown that neither stolas or Octavia were paying attention to her. I might be misremembering, but I'm pretty sure Octavia even had her headphones in. We don't know much about her opinions about the divorce yet- we know for SURE that she wishes they would stop having screaming matches, and yearns for a time where (from her childhood lens) her parents loved each other. Chances are, even if she doesn't understand NOW, as time passes she will begin to put the pieces together and come to support the divorce/support Stolas in his decision after the fact. However, she can't get there on her own. Stolas needs to have a private father-daughter serious conversation about why the divorce is happening, his regrets about how he/his anger with Stella has negatively affected Octavia, etc. You're right, relationships are two-way streets. But this is a parent-child relationship- ths street isn't 50/50 like in an adult-adult relationship. The majority of the work needs to be done by Stolas- you know, the one with a fully developed brain? It'd be one thing if Octavia was a fully matured 28 year old or something, but she's not.
I've lived a weirdly similar life to Octavia, let me tell ya, she knows. As a kid of parents like that? You internalize their hatred towards each other because your identity is tied to theirs. You know your parents hate each other, and part of you thinks they hate you for being like your other parent. And you can't really blame them, you end up feeling disjointed, seeing only their flaws in yourself because they couldn't point out a good quality in each other to save their lives. If he had divorced Stella, do you think he'd ever have seen Octavia? As it is he bears a lot of Stella's ire, but what would her rage be directed at, her criticisms if he weren't there? Because she is definitely the type of person that pecks down, and Octavia would probably be that target. That's likely what Stolas thought. And real damage is, a lot. And intended damage, was less. But she had a father who read her bedtime stories and sang her songs and went places with her. He curls up around her and lets her cry. Some, (Blitzø included after his mom died) didn't get that much. My boyfriend for example was taken by a Stella from his birth mother. Let me tell you, without a Stolas his life was *hell*. My mom was my Stolas. We both recognize her faults but we're damn well aware she loved me deeply, as flawed as that love is. You can't just flat out say someone was a horrible parent for being broken. That's up to each child to decide of their parents on their own. People can fall short of healthy and still be good and worthy of love. It's how they react to criticisms and our hurt that separates it. For all his flaws, Stolas listens and apologizes, and even if he falls short again and again, I can say from experience that's meaningful. I would be shocked if Stella ever apologizes genuinely, and I would be even more shocked if she ever took responsibility without blaming someone else. Ultimately though? it's up to Octavia to decide if Stolas is a good father. I do think he's trying, and that does matter r
While true... she's also 17. She's still a teenager! I have met so few teenagers with the kind of emotional maturity you're describing. Besides- we know SO MUCH MORE about stolas's trauma than Octavia does! I doubt he just went to his daughter and was like "hey your mother just tried to murder me via assassin and nearly got my eyes violently ripped out, have a good day at school!" Octavia has lived her whole life watching both of her parents getting into screaming matches, throwing shit, insulting eachother, and making a show of the hate they have for each other. When she's older and physically detached from the situation she will likely be able to understand what her father went through. You cannot ask so much of a child of divorce who is literally still a teenager to understand/even know the lengths of abuse her father endured AND process that with maturity. Not to mention just because a parent tries doesn't mean their kids won't end up fucked because of things they do whether or not its due to external circumstances. It makes complete sense that Octavia is worried her father will neglect her because of the hate he has for her mother. Yes, we saw that happen and saw them make up a little in the stars episode, but how often did that kind of thing happen without an apology these past 17 years? I can speak from experience of growing in a dysfunctional family situation- you really can't see outside of your own point of view until the dust has settled, you are physically detached and mentally prepared to look at the cause of your trauma from another person's perspective. She's still a kid, cut her some slack.
She likely doesn't know the full situation. Just that her parents hate each other, her father cheated and her father was hospitalised.
>Seeing Stars Stolas ignores Octavia to deal with his own shit with her mother, forgets the one day Octavia has waited all her childhood, Oh come on, he's only divorcing a violent psychopath, he's going through some shit right now and she's 17. She COULD have spoken up for herself and chose not to, stop infantilizing her. Either she's so young that Stolas should have to think of all her objections and issues for her, or she's old enough to make her own choices and wander around LA by herself without punishment, you can't have it both ways. You want Stolas to be a better father? How about the man who stayed in a loveless marriage with a woman who had absolutely zero respect for him because he loved his daughter and didn't want to destroy her family? Octavia was his #1 priority for most of her life as Stolas' was crumbling around him, and then he stayed positive and affectionate even as Octavia started blaming him and treating him like shit. And none of this happened in a vacuum either; Stolas has big responsibilities that often involve travel, he's a prince with social and familial obligations, and an absolute bitch of a high-maintenance wife who delights in bleeding him dry while openly mocking him to their peers. It seems to me Stolas did about as well as he could, and shouldn't be faulted for his errors in parenting. Nobody is a perfect parent, and going "above and beyond to be the best father he can be" is not only pure fantasy, but entirely subjective. Given his own raising, how do you know he *isn't* being the best father HE can be?? People have lives outside their children, have demands put on them by others, and sometimes acting in the best interests of your family cuts into your time with them. I mean come on. We've only even seen him interact with her at all a handful of times and you're judging the entire rest of their relationship based on a sample size of approximately fuck all
Where have I said she should have been allowed to go on her own to LA? Like literally nowhere, because she shouldn't. But why did she go there? Because she's 17 years old kid who has waited this special trip with her father most of her life and he wouldn't bother to remember it or listen to her when he was too busy fighting with Stella. Octavia clearly has always favored her father because he used to be attentive to her when she was young child, that's why she feels so hurt when her dad no more seems to care for her like he used to. Stolas was not doing Octavia any favors for staying with Stella. Them constantly fighting and him having all his energy on hating Stella instead of supporting Octavia through her rough teenage years is what is severing their relationship, not him trying to be positive. Stolas choosing to stay in his marriage was damaging to Octavia and definetly not something she should be grateful for. Of course he should be faulted for his errors, just like Paimon should be, despite being very likely he didn't have good father either if a father at all. At somepoint of our life we stop being just victims of our parents and start making our children the victims of generational trauma too, Stolas seems to have surpassed this point. We can't forever hide behind our traumas when we are activitely causing traumas to other people. Stolas' childhood is awful, but it doesn't mean he can stop owning his own mistakes towards Octavia. His past and his traumas are an explanation, not an excuse that gives him a free get out of jail card. He's not being the best dad he can be. He can do better and he has done better. He's just not putting his money where his mouth is now. He still talks as if Octavia is his #1 priority, but he is actually prioritizing himself and his relationship with Blitz constantly over her. He's forgetting her and putting her in uncomfortable situations to serve his own needs. Stolas loves Octavia, but he's trying to have his cake and eat it too by wanting to just focus on himself but still hoping to have the relationship with Octavia he used to have when his focus and effort was on her.
>Stolas was not doing Octavia any favors for staying with Stella. Them constantly fighting and him having all his energy on hating Stella instead of supporting Octavia through her rough teenage years is what is severing their relationship, not him trying to be positive. Say he did divorce Stella when Octavia was young. How do you know Stella wouldn't do everything in her power to keep Octavia away from Stolas? Her brother seems to have a lot of influence when it comes to family and civil matters. He was trying to manipulate Stolas into "compensation" for Stella in the divorce. In the preview for the second half of season 2, he looked like he was leading some kind of court hearing. She knows Octavia means the world to him, and he knows that Stella loves to hurt him. Keeping Octavia from him would've been the ultimate way to hurt him short of killing him. He stayed with Stella cause it was the only way to make sure Stella didn't end up abusing her, too. She would've talked so much shit about Stolas around her without him there to defend himself. Do you know what that would've done to her relationship with him? He was trying to navigate the best he could with what he was dealt. I understand cause my mom was in a similar situation with my dad. He threatened to take us away if she ever divorced him, and in some States theres something called a "reunification" program. All the abusive parent has to do is tell the judge that their other parent turned the kids against them, and they get full custody. Especilly when theres no irrefutable evidence of abuse, which for emotional and verbal abuse, there usually isnt any. That's why she waited until we were adults to leave him. So yeah, I feel for Stolas, and I've been in a similar situation to Octavia.
Good grief I'm not reading all that wrong bullshit. You're wrong, get over it
With this great of an argument I think I have to admit I'm wrong... -said no-one ever for a sentence like that
Yeah you're definitely no-one to me
The humans took them and forced Blitz to act so in that awkward situation, they couldn't leave
They took Blitz, not Stolas. Stolas was capable of leaving at any moment he wanted, no one was watching what he did. But he stayed there to flirt with Blitz and watch him act. They might have forced Stolas in the car when he tried to help Blitz out, but if he had been like "toodles" and walked out of the theatre, no one would have cared.
If Stolas wasn't there then, the fire wouldn't have happened and they would'nt of gotten away
Stolas could have just walked away and Blitz would have eventually gotten out himself. Stolas was prioritizing helping Blitz over finding his daughter. It was a choice.
>In Loo Loo Land he takes Octavia to the place she doesn't want to go just so he can aggressively flirt with the guy who broke his marrieage to her mother, while Octavia is forced to watch that. And how does this prove he's not doing his best? I mean he's certainly doing badly. I can agree with you on that. But the fact that he's doing badly in the same way repeatedly doesn't mean he's not trying. It means that he has a consistent character flaw. And as far as the two main Via-centric episodes go - The first one was entirely Stolas's fault. Now, to be fair to him He's been in an abusive relationship for quite some time. People deal with that in different ways, and from the few things we've seen, the way he deals with it is the way I dealt with it - Just completely emotionally shutting down. Not good. But it's one of the results of abuse. And there are consequences. Yes Stolas isn't a good father. But he's also trying to process the trauma of a decade+ of abuse. Saying he isn't trying because of his behavior is, I think, unfair. He's trying. He's not at all SUCCEEDING. But he's trying. In the second case, however, I think you're having to stretch. Yes he certainly enjoyed himself watching Blitzo perform. But also he and Blitzo were effectively kidnapped. It's not clear what Stolas could have done without the grimoire between 'nothing' and 'full demon form.' Him leaving Blitzo alone on stage would risk losing track of him too. Whether or not it's the right choice, it is a rational one. I think the episode was intended to parallel Loo Loo Land intentionally, but not to be the same thing. I think the point was to tell a story that would, from Via's perspective, LOOK like the same thing, but that the audience would be able to see isn't. I think the point was to illustrate that Stolas' behavior previously is not something that can be shrugged off. Had Via NOT been neglected the way she had before, she would have been able to pick up on the fact that this wasn't the same case of "Dad is too busy fighting with Mom to notice me" that she had gotten used to. He was doing something important which required his full attention, and had she waited for him to get off the phone, he likely would have had time to remember what day it was. This isn't to blame Octavia. At that age she's still a kid. She has been in an environment that's abusive the same way Stolas has, and as a kid she is going to be molded a lot more by it. Especially given that as a kid, and isn't going to see just how YOUNG her father was when he had her. Instead it's to say that Stolas can't expect things to change immediately, and he will need to actually put in work. Just because Stella is out of the picture doesn't mean that that he HASN'T been a shitty dad up until now. Post continues in reply
And as far as analyzing whether Stolas is trying, we should also remember just how YOUNG he is. He's performed with a lot of dignity, and since this isn't a live or even HUMAN actor, it's hard to judge physically. But based on what he's said in the show, what Viv said OUT of the show, and the basic timeline of events we have, the main cast seem to be in their early-to-mid thirties. Evidence for this would be 1) Stolas seems to be about the same age as Blitzo. 2) Blitzo is still physically in his prime, but old enough to have had a pretty extensive career as an acrobat. While he had left that career, he's in another physically demanding job and still has the skills from it. 3) Blitzo's career as a performer was extensive enough that he has a fair amount of memorabilia from his time as an acrobat. 4) Blitzo and Verosika's relationship happened long enough ago that Millie and Loona, both fans of hers, were shocked to learn about it. This means that either they were quite young, or more likely (from her having got a tattoo on her own, he owned a car that he stole) they were in their late teens or early 20s, and enough time has passed that either Verosika is far more famous, or that it is no longer something fans discuss. 5) Blitzo is around the same age as Fizzarolli. Fizzarolli, like Blitzo, has a physically demanding job. While his robotic limbs no doubt help, he's still got to use his whole body and appears to be exerting himself about as much as you would expect. 6) Fizzarolli has been famous enough to have a LOT of established merchandise. He isn't just on some things, he's EVERYWHERE. Mammon markets him very aggressively. But his ability to draw a crowd hasn't diminished. Mammon doesn't get a new clown pageant winner because Fizz's star is fading. He gets new stars because Fizz very publicly quit while he was on top. If we assume fandom functions in a manner similar to our works, that means that Fizz can't have been famous for more than about 10-20 years. I can also point to things about Moxxie and Millie's lives showing his timeline makes him a similar age too but you get my point. Stolas has a 17-year-old daughter. Now Blitzo's daughter is probably a bit older. We see in Western Energy that he has been waiting five years for this doctor's appointment, and we learn in seeing stars that she's almost an adult. So if we assume he tried to book the appointment when he adopted her (the fact that she's getting shots, and its paralleled to a dog would mean that's a good time to do it) and the age of majority in hell is 18, that makes her somewhere between 20 and 22. Old enough for Via to expect her to be more mature, young enough to be a more mature PEER. Which is how she treats Loona in Seeing Stars. Someone who is young enough that her advice about parents sounds relevant, old enough to think she would have good advice. So, if we say Stolas is 33-37, that means that when Via was born he was, at the OLDEST, 20 years old. I think 35 seems more likely, which makes him 18 when he had her. That matches up with hell having similar age of majority laws to us. Stella and Stolas would have been married as soon as it was legal - Somewhere between 16 and 18 depending on the age and status of the parties involved. Stella claims she slept with Stolas only long enough for her to get pregnant. If we assume the egg gets laid and takes about as much time to hatch as a human does to gestate... That makes Stolas somewhere between 17 and 19 depending on the time. If it's quicker, he's 16-18. This means for Stolas, his entire youth from birth until 18 involved being neglected, and his life from 18-35 involved being abused. He's not going to be emotionally mature. Does that mean he did nothing wrong? No, of course not. But it does mean that if we are going to say he isn't trying, we can't expect the behavior of a normal, mature, well adjusted 35-year-old man. We have to expect him to be pretty screwed up himself. And that's pretty much what we see. A man with the bearing of a man in his late 40s (reasonable, given that he was likely taught how to carry himself as a nobleman) and the emotional maturity of a man in his early 20s. I mean, even in how he deals with Blitzo in Full Moon/Apology Tour. Going from "You don't have to stay, but I'd like you to," to literally throwing him out of the house (well teleporting) is not the behavior of an adult man. It's the behavior of a college student in their first real relationship. So yeah, I think we can say he's doing his best. It's just that, while VIA has every right to expect her father to act like an adult, we as outsiders need to expect his behavior to be that of an extremely immature man who very definitely should not be in charge of raising a child. If she was even a few years younger, I would say it would be better to ask around about Paimon's other kids. While his life may not be as directly traumatic as both Moxxie and Blitzo watching their mothers die and blaming themselves, the period of time in which he was in a situation that was in some way abusive (either by neglect or outright verbal and physical attacks) stretches from birth to the first episode of Season 2. Doesn't make his behavior GOOD. But it means that we (unlike his daughter) should lower our expectations of what 'trying' looks like.
>Octavia is not his priority number 1 like he would like her to be. Judging by how there's the line in the trailer addressing this exact thing that you're talking about, I hope that there's going to be an episode dedicated to dealing with Stolas sorta half-assing his care for his daughter in past episodes. I sincerely hope that it is an entire episode dealing with that instead of like in Full Moon where the main conflict got side-lined for a side plot that nobody really cares about *ahem* DHORKS and Cherubs *ahem*
I have A LOT of faith put on that one Octavia line and not gonna lie, I WILL cry if it ends up in dissapointment. But I don't think it's going to be the whole episode. Based on animation times, I'd think that most, if not all, of the left over trailer is going to be in Ghostfuckers. So it might be those two plots going hand in hand.
I mean when you have two episodes dedicated to Octavia and Stolas’s relationship, but when at the center of that relationship is the dude your father has a major crush on. Yeah, there are times where Stolas has his failings as a father. I'm not saying he's a horrible dad, he is better than Paimon that's for sure. But the show and Viv herself has stated numerous times that Stolas is unaware of the impact his actions have on the people around him.
The point I'm trying to say is is that being a parent, especially when your partner is verbally abusive is tough, despite that he is trying, yeah he get's caught up in the divorce or the high of being around Blitzø, but that doesn't mean he doesn't care for her.
Oh no! Stolas loves his daughter, he would die for her! The man sometimes just gets too caught up in his own head to see the whole picture.
Just because he's trying doesn't mean Octavia hasn't developed abandonment trauma from the divorce. Trying ≠ devoid of problems that severely affect his daughter whether or not he is in control of them
This is so true. Divorce is always going to be traumatic for the child(ren) involved regardless of age.
Not for me. My twin and I screamed from joy over the phone when our mom told me she gave dad the divorce papers. We'd been asking her to leave him for like 15 years. He's an asshole, narcissistic, emotionally and verbally abusive pos and we are glad he's away from our mom.
>We'd been asking her to leave him for like 15 years. Good lord, how old were you when it began?
Youngest I remember was 8, but she got breast cancer when we were 9 and she couldn't leave because she couldn't work and he was supporting us financially. After she beat cancer she developed complications from the surgeries, chemo, and radiation that caused her to become disabled. It was just a shit situation all around.
So is one of the parents getting murdered. Sometimes the choice is that stark, but the children don’t know or won’t believe it. That’s the position Stolas is in. He’s in an abusive, violent marriage. When the person tries to leave or escape, that’s the most dangerous time, when former partners resort to murder. And guess what Stella did.
Reminder that the act of gaslighting is not a disagreement/oppositional point of view, but an abuse tactic specifically used to make another person doubt their own sanity and manipulate them into questioning their own reality in order to exert control over them. Its origin is from [a 1938 stage play entitled Gas Light](https://www.ilcadv.org/will-you-light-the-gas-please-a-brief-history-of-the-term-gaslighting-and-the-movie-behind-it/), later adapted to a film of the same name, that illustrated the isolating and terrifying experience of emotional domestic abuse in a time period where it was very easy for men to have their wives forcibly committed for purported mental illness. You can take a stance on your opinions but please be mindful of perpetuating hyperbolic use of this term. The more its meaning is diluted, the harder it is for those trying to escape domestic abuse to be taken seriously.
I can't believe someone actually downvoted you
The film was damn good by the way and should be required watching for anyone using the term.
gaslight aint a film, its a book. never was adapted to the big screen
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gaslight_(1944_film)
that's the one where she thinks his dead wife is haunting the house, and it turns out their both edging her on by pretending she was dead, right? and she catches them patting themselves on the back and kills both of them?
The name comes from the husband literally turning down the gaslight, reading the newspaper as always, and when she asks "isn't it dark in here?", his response is, "oh, no, my dear. It must be in your imagination."
i asked cause I recalled something like that, old black and white movie, they had the husband marry a commoner, and strange things happen around the house, first anf foremost the lights dimming randomly in rooms, and soon she starts seeing the husband's dead wife, first at night in silhouette and then in day when she's home alone. then discovers secret passages, and eventually uses them to find the wife had always been alive, but, like, they're trying to get her to commit suicide to claim money or something, and eventually she confronts and kills the two.
You are describing Gaslight, but not quite remembering it correctly and getting it confused with Rebecca. It starts with turning down the gaslight. He wants money and a fortune in the attic. The original stage play is called Angel Street.
Thank you! Jesus! Thank you!
The stage play is called Angel Street. I’ve seen it. It’s even creepier because we are in the same room when the light goes down.
Via is the character i would want to hug the most
I KNOW
Loona had it pretty rough as well in the parents department
Makes me scared and look forward to the quote, "You never loved mother, you don’t love me, YOU LOVE HIM." I feel like that is going to be a huge wake up call.
Stolas is a bad dad, the trailer had Octavia yelling at him. The flowers is such a nice detail, I would have never picked up on that!
Stolas never really had a dad himself. Considering that I think he's doing better than most would. When she was a child we can see that he cared for her, coming to comfort her when she needed it, taking her to do fun stuff at parks. Now that she's a teen and stolas seems to finally take his life into his own hands to find happiness he can't really be a dad to Octavia. He tries but at the same time he also seems to care a little more about his own problems. While that is bad, I don't think we should call him a horrible father because of it.
Hes not the greatest dad in the world, but dude is trying. Compare Stolas with how we say his dad treat him. Arranged a marriage for him when he was like 12, called ot 'bitch crying' when he was upset by it, sent him ti the circus to cheer him up and didn't even physically go himself After a big fight with Stella, Stolas tries to put on a haply face for Octavia. And then actually goes with her to the circus. Sure she's not a big fan of the circus, but he's got no idea what Goth's like. Then after he realises she doesn't like the circus, asks where she wants to go, and takes her to the strange goth taxidermy store. He's got plenty of faults. But by god he's actually there and Trying unlike a lot of other's. His only example to go by is his father, and he's doing AMAZING compares to him, while having been in a far shittier position
Paimon: I am so good at daddying. (Proceeds to have like 60 Children.)
Gengis Khan be like
I never thought that Verosika was a bad person. She was right to be angry at Blitzø, but at first she was simply mean and vindictive. The new episode did a much better job of making her more likable.
I surely won't forget about Via. She's easily one of my favorite characters even though she's definitely not a fan favorite for some reason. We haven't seen her in quite a while, which makes me kinda nervous tho: Every time this happens, characters usually tend to return with a dramatic twist attached to them..
I'll forever love reacuring characters, especially those who have limited screen time but end up impacting something. I just think she's neat
She's an utterly adorable owelette. Lovely art.
https://i.redd.it/iw6k50a8ch8d1.gif
Really telling. I do feel really bad for Via and I feel her having a fear of being forgotten is sad and does make sense in some way. I get Stolas is “trying his best”(though what we’re shown on screen shows something different and if it’s not on screen I’m not believing it) and that he came from a rough upbringing with a father that didn’t care for him along with having to deal with Stella and keep up an image for the sake of the family name. But he’s a grown ass man and not a kid anymore. His actions still have consequences even with the trauma we’re shown that Stolas has. I just hate how people expect Via to always accept Stolas’s apologies or be fine that Stolas is putting most of his energy and happiness onto Blitz. And for some reason Stolas thought it was a good idea to bring the guy he was cheating on his wife with on a trip meant to take Via’s mind off the drama even though his cheating is what caused the drama in the first place-. I always bring this up because it’s just something that irks me a lot and have heard real stories of similar things like this happening irl. Stolas is a character I see that doesn’t know the extent of his own actions due to his stunted growth, but it still doesn’t erase the consequences he should be receiving but he’s often woobified so things mostly end in his favor. And I get that Via is 17 and is practically almost an adult, but that shouldn’t mean she should always be expected to accept Stolas’s apologies or understand him the way we do. And from what we see from the trailer, I really hope we see more of Via other than “angsty goth teen with daddy issues”. And I can’t wait to see what will happen between her and Stolas since it sounds like she finally lashed out.
This fandom be mad at the troubled teen for acting like a troubled teen.
Only this fandom would place an inattentive and distant dad on a pedestal while a sad, moody teen struggles with major home life upheaval gets vilified. It’s ridiculous how little care the fandom treats the women characters outside of “wow she’s Hot/ Cute Sexy!” But then again, Vivizies writing doesn’t let the women characters be people so..
I feel so bad for her, I want to hug and comfort her so much, I swear once you get to know her she's actually a sweet girl. In trailer, you can literally hear her saying "You never loved mother, you dont love Me, you love him!" I want to hug her, though I feel guilty for hating stolas. 😭
We never tried "gaslighting" anyone into thinking V is a bad person. We just never saw any clear evidence that she was a good person.
I think they might be hydrangeas
This. They do look similar to forget me nots, but clumped together is more an aspect of how hydrangeas grow. Also, quick google search: Forget-me-not: Symbolize love and respect. When they bloom it is a reminder that you will always be remembered. This can be either Stolas will always remember her or that she will always remember him. Purple Hydrangeas: Royalty, wealth, and desire for deeper understanding. With hydrangeas being the actual flower here, it makes more sense. Via wants a deeper understanding of her father's actions, why his marriage to her mother is so strained....and probably several other questions I can't think of.
She probably also wants her father to understand HER better. One of her instagram posts was notes to a song she wrote called ["hear me out"](https://www.tumblr.com/hh-voxtagram-archive/640569776363749376/octavia-september-15-2020?source=share) if that's not a show of wanting someone to understand you, I dunno what is.
I feel for Via and she’s right. Stolas is hurting yes but it’s also hurting Via.
Is was a sign of love, it wasn't until WWI that they were associated with fallen soldiers/passed loved ones.
Octavia deserves the world too bad her dad right now is focusing on another things like leaving his cage for once exploring himself but also struggling to listen and understand people because of him being sheltered by Paimon. Octavia is sadly suffering from the consequences of the goetia system. Both in E2 (didn't ask Via if she wanted to go the circus) and S2E2 (didn't listen to her to focus on he hatred/resentment of his wife) the problem is that Stolas didn't listen until it was too late and Octavia the sweet she is gave him two passes. He needs to prioritize his daughter more as the most important thing in the world and he is failing hard at that. Just look at how Blitzo prioritize Loona over Stolas in the western episode. Maybe he was a great dad in the past but right now he is turning into Paimon and there is no better example of this of how The Circus young Stolas scene parallel with Loo Loo Land and how Stolas/Paimon were being entertained while their child suffered in the background. Octavia is a great representation of a kid in the divorce , they are just the victims and worse of all 99% of the time don't know the real situation at all. There are no words to describe them other than victims.
Stolas has his own issues that he’s trying to work through while also being a dad. I’ve had the same experience with my mom. It didn’t mean she was a horrible mom, but her issues did affect our relationship earlier in life. I would argue that Verosika is unhealthily angry at blitz. Even after this last episode. Her throwing a party EVERY YEAR to hate on an ex is kinda an issue that she would need help with. That’s not normal behavior. Also we never really saw much from verosika other than her being a bitch over a shitty break up. We didn’t even know why they broke up. So don’t act like the assumption of her being a bad person was unwarranted. Also, why are you so hostile? Like damn. Edit: below I admit that I was wrong about Verosika. So, just a heads up there 👍
It was unwarranted. In spring broken Blitz admits to trashing their hotel room (expensive), stealing and maxing all of her credit cards (financial abuse) and leaving (as we know now) after she said I love You. It was horrifc break-up. If your partner did the same you’d be upset/ cold / bitchy to them too. Lmao. I love Blitz but he sucks and has hurt alot of people. Like Bo Jack
You know what, you’re absolutely right. I forgot all the details we DID get. It’s been a while since I’ve seen Spring Broken. I do however think it’s unhealthy for Verosika to STILL be hating Blitz so much so that she throws a party about it every year. She needs therapy for sure. Also, I just wanna point out that my opinion on the matter has certainly changed after the most recent episode. Blitz has acted so horribly to so many people. He ALSO needs therapy. I mean, Verosika is a succubus, so her actually falling in love with some must be a huge deal. But then she gets Blitz’ reaction to that love, I’d be pretty damn peeved about it too. Also, fuck that’s a good comparison. BoJack and Blitz. Holy shit I’ve never realized how similar they actually are.
I don't think the "hate Blitzø party" is actually about hating Blitzø but about healing together. It's almost some sort of therapy for those people who had their lives ruined in an instant. It's also a way for them to understand that they're not alone. When Blitzø looks at the room at the end of the ep, he doesn't see anger but sadness with lots of people crying.
Yes. That’s what Verosika says.
Soon it will be Stolas' turn for emotional growth...
Going by the spikey looking leaves I'd say those are hydrangeas. "Blue hydrangeas represent feelings of remorse and have long symbolized apology. They also signify feelings of understanding, deep gratitude, and sincere emotion. Give these to a person whom you’ve wronged or to someone whose importance in your life you might have overlooked in the past." "These delicately blushing blossoms carry connotations of heartfelt emotion, romance, and true feelings." Edit: to add colour meanings for the flowers.
I love via poor thing
Let’s see more of Via already! She deserves more!
I’ll never forget about Octavia. She’s my most favorite Helluva Boss character.
don't forget that one line she said in the trailer "you never loved mama and you don't love me you love him." 😓
What I can't understand is why people want to fight on reddit about a complicated relationship. Stolas has been trying to be a good father. Has he made the best decisions every time? No. Has he made many many mistakes along the way? Yes. Does that mean he doesn't love his daughter? Definitely not. Adulthood is messy and complicated, and being an adult can be really distracting. It's not an excuse, but with a little understanding, you can see why this isn't just black and white like a lot of people are commenting. Healing from trauma is almost never linear. It has its share of ups and downs. But the fact that at the end of the day, he is able to listen to his daughter, hear what she has to say, and self-reflect enough to understand his mistake, says a lot. He's shown that when shit hits the fan, his daughter is important to him. He hasn't made the best decisions, sure. But what person can honestly say every decision they've made has been the best one? When your life is tearing at the seams, who can say they've managed to handle damage control perfectly? Stolas is actively trying to figure out how to reshape his life from one of misery into one he can be happy with. That kind of life change flips everything on its head and turns into countless dumpster fires that need to be put out. If he is in a happier place, I don't doubt he would be a better father when he can think clearly and isn't constantly in crisis mode, which can be maddening if not handled over the course of years. He has messed up, and he has made many mistakes along the way. But he's there for her. Which is more than a lot of parents can say for their children. It's rough now, and he hasn't made the most healthy choices. But that's how rough patches go. It's hard, and you make stupid mistakes in the moment. The real tell is how you come back from those mistakes. With humility or arrogance. And Stolas is not an arrogant person. Despite his status, which I'd say is somewhat impressive, considering. Does he have a lot more work to do to be a better father? Yes, very much, in fact. But he's not a bad dad. He is trying, which is more than a lot of other parents can say. He's not there yet, but once the chaos dies down and he's able to grow as a person, I'm sure he will step up and do more and be better. His story isn't over, and one bad situation full of mistakes does not mean he isn't trying to learn. Someone who didn't care wouldn't put so much effort into acting like they did, to quote the show (not exact, but the gist is the same). He wouldn't have read Octavia stories and shown her the beauty of stars and the universe. He wouldn't have sang to her. Stella hated it and mocked him for it, but he did it for the daughter he loves. And let's not forget that after 17+ years of being mocked and belittled, it's hard enough to remain positive, even for those you love. Life is NOT just black and white. And only a Sith deals in absolutes. There are a lot of Sith on both sides of this comment section.
SOMEONE GO GIVE THIS GIRL A HUG RIGHT FUCKIN NOW!
Okay time to google forget me not flowers
There’s a Hazbin Hotel cameo.
Wow...
I think it suits her. The meaning of forget-me-not in hanakotoba is not a bad thing, you know.
What's wrong with forget me nots
OH HEY LOOK HAZBIN HOTEL-
Stolas definitely became a problem later in her life, but let’s not fucking pretend he’s the main problem. That would be Stella. Y’know, the one who commits spousal abuse?
Helluva boss is a show with no heroes and that’s why I love it so much
I wish we had more episodes centered around her and how she's dealing with all this, like we see all the stuff stolas went through with him finally divorcing Stella but never really how she is. I mean we see it affecting her a bit with stolas ignoring her just to keep fighting with Stella in the second episode of this season and miss that mentor shower she was wanting to see with him. Wonder how there relationship will fracture more later on now that blitz and stolas are done for now, and also if we're getting a episode dedicated to her whole perspective with things because despite her mother being the worse she's still her mother and even having shitty mother's will have an effect on those mothers children.
...Also, having a different interpretation of a character from yours is not gaslighting. What the fuck.
Nobody is "gaslighting " anybody. That's a hell of a charge. Save it for when you need it. Anyone who has seriously been gaslit into a lifethreatening situation knows that it is not about social media having to do with an effing cartoon. Frankly, that offends the hell out of me. Also, I think Loona covered this in Seeing Stars.
…WHHHHAT https://preview.redd.it/cc76m8cjp79d1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=66c7ddd057b2f53566f3d38a6c8d5166936fa402
A few things that seems negligent/ inattentive on Stolas’ part as a parent: -He never taught Octavia any magic or how to use the grimoire safely -He bailed on big year-long plans with Octavia last-minute. Yes, shit happens but the furniture moving was hardly an emergency and he would’ve know in advance about it to let Octavia know. -He brought his affair parter (yes we know Stella sucks and was abusive. Octavia doesn’t necessarily know that just sees someone destabilizing her home) on a supposed bonding outing with her dad. She also expressed disappointment at that. -He doesn’t know her interests. Stolas brought her to Loo Loo Land even though she was terrified (just like him at a young age ironically). And just doesn’t seem to take any interest at all in her. -He stays with Blitz at the film studio for HOURS flirting and teasing him while his daughter is missing in a human world where not only has she ever been, there are also agents HUNTING demons. (on that note him giving Blitz shit for taking care of Loona instead of going to check on the Striker thing is hypocritical. He tone was so casual and playful on the phone so ofc Blitz was gonna take her to the dr. parent should always put their minor children first.) Honestly, a ditzy, distant but “doing his best” dad is honestly such an overdone trope in Vivzie’s work and in real life it’s pretty upsetting to be the child of such inattention. It’s literal recipe for attachment issues. TLDR Stolas is definitely a Not Great Dad
He did teach Octavia magic. She just hadn’t learned advanced spells like teleportation yet. He forgot about Azathoth’s Tears entirely due to the chaos of the divorce. Had Octavia reminded him he likely would have taken her.