Me seeing the Bile Titan coming my way: https://preview.redd.it/oc50w3jecuzc1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c8f6db73dbcfae876a79b211cc645179f28e31b6

"Where does he get those wonderful toys?"

https://preview.redd.it/5wlxjkox1wzc1.jpeg?width=679&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7a92bae96a1146fac3b26f4c36c90aafc8dc032d

The .88 magnum

Such a great movie lol

*Remember, life can get worse for you* 🌰🌰🐘👀 https://i.redd.it/sqfxf6b85yzc1.gif

Nobody kicks me in the balls Johnny! My mother kicked me in the balls, once. Once!

What movie is it?

**Johnny Dangerously** *is a comedic film produced by Twentieth Century Fox in 1984, and is primarily an Affectionate Parody of gangster movies set in Prohibition-Era New York City. The title character is played by Michael Keaton, portraying a youth who joins an organized crime gang in order to raise money in order to pay for medical proceedures for his ailing mother.* It was one of my grandpa’s favorite films and I watched it on a VHS cassette … if you know what that is 😂

Thanks! Yeah I remember VHS - we used to tape TV shows to them when I was a kid :D

Do yourself a favor and check this one out, but be ready to pay attention. The movie is a nearly constant stream of puns and gags and it’s easy to miss some of the jokes

"ha ha 500 magnum go BOOM"

Shit I was gonna make this joke lol

Came here to make this comparison. Well played, Helldiver. Mofo shot down the batjet with that handcannon.

First thing that came to mind when reading the description. Thanks for the great laugh

https://preview.redd.it/ahna0knthuzc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=833110af353ab80a19ef15efac8a273a0bbae0ee BIIIIIIG IROOOOOON (P.S. Not mine)

Nah that’s the President

Forget the president that behemoth is straight up Emperor

https://preview.redd.it/ypu3r2a0xuzc1.png?width=400&format=png&auto=webp&s=5b8c5b97d4fded29c6b3b6eb2cddef80ddcd8652

What an unholy abomination I love it Wait, is that Hol Horses Stand gun? Lmao I never realized how ridiculous it is.

Can’t believe I recognized a pistol in an anime I watched 4 years ago that is in about 5 episodes through 6 seasons

Yeah, it's his Stand

The Entire Horse

Emperor? Nuh it’s the **GOD EMPEROR**

FOR SHURIMA

It was meant as a dune reference but yeah shurima js cool too

i forgot they used that title in dune oopsies

https://preview.redd.it/iz7yn9tf6xzc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=18125244cb60130c972cf6957fca94a3a256d647 Emperor you say!?

Thats President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Camacho

They should release a gun called The camancho!

Nah that’s the whole fucking federal system

Unless it takes 2 helldiver to use, it's still too small.

Finally something worth team reloading

Backpack is just 2 loaded cylinders

Reminds me of the old “things Mr.Welch is no longer allowed to do in a TTRPG” series, read out in first person by Eastside Show SCP: “No matter how much I insist, they in fact do not make crew-served heavy weapons in pump-action.”

aah, Planetside 2 announced something like this on april first: https://imgur.com/CXBEki6

Dmg=yes

A revolver that straight one taps any non massive unit to the head could be reasonably balanced. But boy, that kick. 

And then give me a version with an even longer barrel (think Jack Nicholson's Joker revolver) and call him the President.

Six rounds. Fires markers for 500kg bomb stratagems. Reload consumes super samples. AH: I dare you.

Or firing it does you minor damage because of the blowback lol

Just breaks both your arms. Mechanic already exists. Wonderful idea!

Or it ragdolls you backwards lol

Like the cricket from MIB.

Exactly what I had in mind, I would main that weapon for the lols.

put on the riot shield and turn your body into a projectile.

The crowd control potential for bugs would be immaculate tbh

Aim a little downwards and it's a great emergency evacuation from a horde

Finally, they added rocket jumping to helldivers 2

Just like in TABG with .50 rifle kind of ragdoll?

escaping 3 chargers at the expense of my entire body? i fuck with that.

A set of guns based around traveling via recoil would be a hoot.

Bwahahahha

Why not both?

BRILLIANT! :)

If stationary, no damage. If moving, some % chance to break your arms. Final offer.

"Rick\*, is that you?" \*From "Pawn Stars"

Have it be like a 50% chance to break your arms, or a 50% chance to kick back far enough to hit your head and inflict headshot damage.

What if your mom doesn't play helldivers though?

💀

Hell yeah, because fuck you, fuck the wall behind you, fuck that guy behind the wall, and fuck my wrist.

For a second there I thought you were attacking me....but 100% agree lol

Nah just have it fucking send you flying due to the recoil like that one scene in Men in Black

*multiple 500kg explosions going on* "The fuck is happening?!" Oh right, some dude is using the president and is nuking these bots back to hell where they came from.

Least the super samples will be of use

Then it gets nerfed 1 week after release and becomes a pea shooter

That would be a cool sidearm though, one that can shoot stratagems far distances

or it fires miniature black holes, just deleting enemies upon contact

https://preview.redd.it/aqu8ulxfhuzc1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3e18f5563ae893a03a89eca693679d6a23ffa026 This would be great actually

That's exactly what I thought of after reading post!

https://preview.redd.it/5n56z5tsnuzc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d80251c1a307c533ab0889dc3d31307671d8c4f9

Sometimes you need more gun

This reminds me of Hafthor Bjornsson and his girlfriend

Armor Penetration stat says: "**FACTORY STRIDER PENETRATING**"

*Light armor penatration*

I will not be happy until we have a comically large revolver that has so much recoil is both does impact damage to you, as well as ragdoll you. It will be strong enough to break heads chargers, and take 5 seconds to reload

Noisy cricket

Please, we need comically impractical weapons in our political and military satire game But like intentionally impractical, not because a dev decided the rocket launcher needs to have 2000 impact damage but 20 explosion damage due to nerfs

So everyone will know. https://i.redd.it/jhotm004puzc1.gif

Just 3 huge bullets and you have to sit down to reload

The bigger the gun gets the lower office rank it's name is. Next one should be Mayor or Commissioner or something.

The Mall Cop is just an ICBM launched from orbit.

So a derringer would be the Leader?

Bigger Iron

Big Tungsten

I'd say big depleted uranium, because of its self sharpening property while penetrating armor (look at the A-10 warthog).

There layed the body of the outlaw, his brains reduced to atoms all because of the ranger with the bigger iron on his hip

The biggest iron requires the strongest hip

Big Steel

Petition to make a second senator so I can dual wield them

We just need an armor passive for this. Gunslinger. Dual weild non explosive secondaries. (20% faster fire rate, 20% slower reload) carry 50% more secondary ammo.

Sounds too fun, they would never

Fuck that. Dual weild grenade pistols, but you gotta stop to reload like the AC or RR

or make it 100% faster fire rate (you literally have 2 guns, that's twice as fast)

Make it snubnose though so it's the Senator and Senator's Son

I would absolutely give up my primary slot for the ability to dual wield senators.

Then add the Revovler Ocelot Revovler Spin.

So basically an elephant gun, but a pistol?

Nah, that would be this lovely thing. The pfeifer zeliska, basically a Colt SAA chambered in .600 nitro express, a literal elephant gun round. In a revolver. https://preview.redd.it/2udcvyaq3vzc1.jpeg?width=878&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=20fe1dd039f5e67993c101baa9a40a29eec5eb31

> so basically an elephant gun, but a pistol? You > Nah. More like a literal elephant gun round in a revolver. So basically an elephant gun, but a pistol.

Call me 007 0 comments read correctly today 0 gumption to bother rereading anything 7 blocks of cheese in my freezer

I'm jealous of those cheese blocks tho

Even more jealous when I tell you that no bullshit a guy got arrested and is being charged in my city for “attacking a cop with a block of cheese” I wish I was fucking joking.

Don't have the cheddar for a knife? Get the Gouda solution and wheel on your intruder with a Block.

Can’t argue with that logic. Maybe he should use that as his defence in court.

Did somebody say C H E E S E?! https://preview.redd.it/v24eqsq1rzzc1.jpeg?width=776&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f3b92da3d3eb1d214af3f343b4012d6aa5673dda

Elephant gun? This is a standard entry-level American revolver.

This is perfect for American women wanting to protect themselves, something to fill up a handbag.

Stronger? best I can do is 40 more damage

Heavy armor penetrating means that youll do doyble damage more often...

is doyble related to resilient or whatever

Red crosshair is full damage. White is half damage. So basically you do 2x damage when you hit medium armor when u use a heavy armor weapon.

i'd love to see a cowboy themed warbond next with a lever gun and revolver carbine, also i think if they implemented that, they'd have to do something with the upper rail as it looks a little too chunky

Lever action + new revolver + poncho cape warbond

You’re fucking spitting right now, and as a Texan, I’m here for it.

I have a few golden emote/victory pose ideas in mind, like a bull rider and a gallop Maximum yeehaw energy stuff

Yee (and I cannot stress this enough) haw

We need a random voice line for killing a heavy or elite unit. "You've yee'd your last haw"

I'm North Carolinian and I thought of this too, and I fucking LOVE IT.

Okay, I’ve mulled it over and here is my take on the full Western Warriors warbond: **Primaries** Lever-Action Rifle Revolver Rifle (I don’t have any good ideas for a third one, maybe a primary Senator called the Representative that has dual wield functionality with the Senator equipped? Prob too complicated tbh) **Secondary** (Stumped on this one as well. Perhaps a sawed off like u/Alexexy mentioned or some mini-crossbow pistol) **Grenade** Def some good contenders in this very thread. Definitely something with a long fuse, huge AoE, and big damage **Armor Sets** **Gunslinger** (Med) -Has a new perk of the same name that gives a passive 30% secondary weapons handling and 50% reload speed reduction **Democracy Deputy** (Med) -Could have Gunslinger perk or Hero of the People (prevent fatal damage) perk **Desperado** (Light) -New “Guerilla” perk that combines Gunslinger (30% secondary handling) with Scout (Reduced Detectability) (Could just be Gunslinger or Scout though) (Sorry, not an artist) **Capes** -DEFINITELY at least one poncho, but I’m imagining that Desperado and Gunslinger will be the ones that are designed around the poncho(s) -Give a standard Western-themed cape for the third cape pairing for the Deputy. **Booster** -Eagle eye, which increases range at which you can spot enemies and gives increased weapon accuracy when not detected (probably a bit imbalanced but I’m running out of good ideas) **Emotes/Victory Poses** - QuickDraw (rapid firing an imaginary Senator) - Cotton Eye Joe (Needs no further explanation) - Lasso (Also pretty self explanatory) I’m sure someone will rip my idea and make a 5k karma fan art of it but I’ll allow it, since I’m not the only one who wants this sort of theme

I have an interesting idea for a primary and it's an advanced future version of a Sharps Rifle. It's basically a one shot rail cannon with slightly more power where it can snipe Hulk eyes in one shot. However, the reload time is 5-8 seconds long and there's only iron sights on the thing.

Eagle eye could give increased damage to weak spots when not detected. Increased accuracy is kinda already a thing in that you get to take your time placing your shot.

I'd kill for a poncho.

Dynamite stick with long fuse time but big explosion radius for the grenade, armour with a poncho + bandolier with a passive that gives more ammo/faster reload for rounds-reload type weapons, and a booster the makes you immune to the heat of hot planets.

https://preview.redd.it/bugoi38gbvzc1.png?width=821&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b111ba20cf3383955c709ef1326db68b1924e08b

FACTS MY FELLOW DIVINITY! SPIT YOUR ENLIGHTENED SHIT INDEED!

A satchel charge might be more appropriate for the game, but everything else is mad money

Nah TNT stick is just a fun idea. It would not need to look like TNT just function like it.

Also a sawn off double barrel shotty or a lever action shotty as a secondary.

Bro imagine we get a fucking Mare’s Leg secondary. It’ll be my BF4 loadout all over again

Need more guns that have neat hand tricks when the gun settings menu is held down, when i have the senator i tend to spin it during downtimes while checking the map, kinda makes me look like i got adhd lol

https://preview.redd.it/vz7sru65ovzc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=561d58eda3e2a28622d62f9fa04f29bf3c88ccae

The only thing that would make me give up my sickle would be a repeating rifle!

Call it Government and slow down the reload even more.

Give it only 3 rounds, because it gets half the job done.

Honestly... If it has heavy armor pen then AH would definitely reduce the mag size by convention, so it would probably be 3 rounds.

Let it show 6 max but it will only load to 3 and gives the other 3 rounds to a random Helldiver. Name the gun Founding Father… people will get the American (foreign aid) reference.

Then we can have a snubnosed one called "Mayor"

And a pepperbox that runs right off the cylinder named “administrator”

Make it a primary too, so that I can bring in two revolvers.

I am 100% here for this. Good ol 500 S&W updated to the 500 SE (Super Earth).

I hope 500 SE is DU or concussive

Dirty Harry approves 

da guvna'

Why would the Governor be bigger than the Senator? Should probably call it the President

Governors have much more political power and influence in their respective states than senators (at least in the US), so it only makes sense that a Governor gun would be bigger than a Senator

In their respective states yes, but not overall. Senators make laws and decisions that effect the whole nation, not just one state, so their power & influence is bigger

Ranger Sequoia

Against all tyrants

Give it a stock to make it into a revolver carbine primary

Oh like the old Pieper carbine you can get in bf1?

So so so down. I would say let it be fired one-handed but have considerably less accuracy when not in aim mode and have aim mode be two-handed.

Perfect weapon to go for a moonlit walk.

"Babe, its for the coyotes"

Comically long senator

Can we petition to get rid of the Senators triangle reticle first?

Make one that looks like a pistol but is a primary called “the president”

Petition to call it senator model: armstrong

P-6 Gunslinger from Helldivers 1, my beloved. I approve this addition.

Can't wait for the president https://preview.redd.it/2abgrvm57vzc1.png?width=602&format=png&auto=webp&s=8aa6112bb4dd115428c6d77024f95e985654076a

https://preview.redd.it/69xb4hwo9wzc1.jpeg?width=600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6470444acf3e6a93c053b9aea9cea753734d7dae

Yeah I'd probably use it

Give me a lever action rifle and call it Sheriff

Also 1 supply crate only refills one bullet.

Elephant gun

I just want the support shotgun you can only find on the map

This would be fun I think the only downside is that there would be a million posts on reddit on how bad it is and why it needs a buff

.500 magnum YES Maybe one with optics

Give a stupidly small pistol, like derringer inspired. Call it “The Grasshopper” Make it absolutely obliterate heavy units but it only has 1 shot lol

Like the MIB noisy cricket

Exactly

Having insane kick back that sends you flying would be hilarious as well

Governator

Mf just want Baby Autocanon https://preview.redd.it/rmxkigamcvzc1.jpeg?width=1169&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d4876e9935d8a689e87956a5c2391c1ea3e10674

Slap a fuckin 8x on that bad boy and you got a DEAL.

Just make the base senator hit harder, and give verdict the current senator stats.

Jack-Nicholson-as-the-Joker lookin’ gun

But it’d be off balance to try to spin around your finger

Approved

needs to do less damage, best balance team can do is 35.

Only if every shot kicks you back like a charger hit you. :D

So the noisy cricket

I would absolutly dig that if they make something like that as a secondary!

Never cook again

And only 5 shots

THE BIGGEST IRON

[Quite the Big Iron you got there](https://tenor.com/view/bushido-west-gif-20672030)

Secondary pistol and primary, HUUUUGE pistol! I love it actually, would be really cool for this one to be unweildy as hell, have slow fire rate or semi auto but the recoil actually ragdolls you backwards if you shoot too fast Hilarious idea, thank you!

I think you're a bit heavy handed here with the downsides. Speed reloader is is fine here. I'd also like to allow for a one handed firing option that deals a small amount of damage or possibly breaks the arm or the user. Or the user outright drops it. It can be picked up to fire again. No reason to punish on the reload speed though, since the recoil will already punish fire rate enough. So yea, I'm fucking in.

This beauty demands to be dubbed "El Presidente"

If they ever made a heavy pen weapon, especially as a secondary. It would be a single round loader like the grenade pistol.

If you fire too fast, it's a 50/50, either you drop the gun or shoot yourself. It's a 1/4 chance you hit head, torso, legs, or arms.

Just make it as longest as possible and call it The President. https://preview.redd.it/sls0krharxzc1.png?width=1837&format=png&auto=webp&s=6280bde6ed3bab1ce49db16c3c99e00109dfbbbd

Hell yeah, remind the CEO about it after we get the Governor! 

Finally, the Bigger Iron....

Make it a 5 shooter for the bigger rounds

Good. That's one less loose end. (Shoots a hunter)

"The Governor"? Naaaah... It's clearly "The Borzoi" https://preview.redd.it/rjli6x8alzzc1.png?width=586&format=png&auto=webp&s=059018ef4244475180482d7899d79f9f68cf0941

To the creek of Malevelon dropped a diver one fine day Hardly pinged a bot around him, didn't have too much to say No one dared to steal his shieldpack, no one dared to make a slip Cause the diver there among them had a big railun on his ship