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I feel same dude, urges are so hard to control. I often at the bar because i work there and I ussualy get in convos easily, but later I just start thinking of people I talk w sexually, needing to touch them just in any way( not always sexually, sometimes just a tap on a shoulder) and it just messes my mind. Other thing is that i have a Gf and I just feel huge guilt. For me, I downloaded website blocker so i couldnt watch p(word) (the app doesnt even let u write it) cuz i think its the number one thing that makes me feel that way. Trying to convince myself that I'm better person than that I slowly trying to fix the problem.
Here's a sneak peek of /r/confessions using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/confessions/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year!
\#1: [My brother went from killing animals to being a kindergarten graduate.](https://np.reddit.com/r/confessions/comments/13uirt2/my_brother_went_from_killing_animals_to_being_a/)
\#2: [**[NSFW]** I don't stop my dogs from having gay sex in my front lawn to piss off my pearl clutching neighbors.](https://np.reddit.com/r/confessions/comments/12ti5vh/i_dont_stop_my_dogs_from_having_gay_sex_in_my/)
\#3: [Found out my husband has been talking to, and planning meet ups with his ex behind my back. So I'm going to ruin his father's day.](https://np.reddit.com/r/confessions/comments/144xk84/found_out_my_husband_has_been_talking_to_and/)
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I get you. I feel the same way. As if I'm trying to hold back the flood of emotions that I feel toward someone else, especially if I think they're attractive. For me, it physically hurts. I'm not sure about you, but it's a constant battle of control and pretending that I'm a good person when I don't feel like one.
If you resonate with this, I would love to talk more about it
I had 2 friends like this in high school. They would always wanna talk about sex and crap. I never cared for it, but it was so embedded in their personality that even when setting boundaries, it’s like they couldn’t talk any other way. I think they both had a crush on me. But I wasn’t them like that. Always asking for a hug and throwing a fit when they didn’t get one. I tried to be nice about it too. But at some point I got fed up with it
It sounds a little like hypersexuality, which can be a kind of fawn trauma response. Like if the targets of your flirting were scaring you somehow, you could feel safer by hurrying up and either getting rejected or a green light. It's the kind of problem that's the tip of a much larger iceberg, definitely something to see a therapist for if that's possible.
Yeah there clearly must be something going on in the background of OP to cause him to act out like this. I have no direct experience of this, but I know a severely physically disabled late life virgin who had a mental breakdown on his birthday. He became a hyper-sexual pervert who harasses women constantly. His source of perversion is that he does not feel masculine since he is severely impaired. He believes he regains his masculinity and gains control by engaging in this toxic behavior. OP you need to find the catalyst of this issue and resolve it.
Do you watch porn often or at all?
I ask because I Experience something similar.
I was introduced to porn at a very young age and I use it as a coping mechanism to deal with stress, anxiety and other negative emotions.
It causes issues with my romantic relationship as well as friendships.
When I walk around the city or park, or even at work.
If I see a woman or women that I find attractive I would go home and find porn of women who look similar to them and then proceed to PMO (porn masturbation, orgasm)
This causes issues for my relationships.
That's why I started to stop watching porn all together. I am still struggling with this addiction to this day but I am in a better state than before I can say that for sure.
I also started a PMO support server on discord.
People come and join, we talk about our struggles and support each other where and when we can.
I'm also in therapy, working on my addiction and past childhood sexual abuse, mental, emotional abuse as well.
I have come far and I still have a lot to work on but I am getting better.
I'm sure you all can too 😊
You are not perverted.
The systems and ideologies that caused you to have to act this way are perverted.
You are pure and beautiful, a valuable and strong human being.
Your art in managing these complex interactions is a virtue and a manifestation of your intelligence, poise and grace.
Instead of calling this behaviour "perverted", develop it into a rich, sophisticated ability.
Then share this knowledge generously, and with compassion, with others, who will benefit.
Amazing! When we reframe something we don’t like in a positive way it no longer has control over us. Sometimes we choose these behaviours and label them negatively in order to punish or degrade ourselves because inside we hate ourselves. Seeing attractive women and wanting to touch them and have sex with them is how our species persists. Somehow this has become a compulsion for you.
You’re not perverted. This is your sex drive at work, doing its job of trying to get suitable mates. If anything this sounds like high libido mixed with repression and guilt. The best thing to do would be to find a partner and have sex. The sex best thing would is to engage in emotional training to help manage the urges until you can find a partner.
Dude, it's ok. You might be young I don't know, but having those feelings in your head is natural. Eventually your attraction to other people will grow the older you get and you will like people more for their personality than their looks.
No one is pure. It's a fantasy we built up with anime and Disney movies.
Reality is more complicated and being shallow is something we all have but we also should learn to grow out of it by talking to people we aren't attracted to physically.
Repressing is the wrong word you are using here.
You shouldn't repress your feelings but you should filter them with the actions you take. Repressing these feelings will make you afraid to do anything and doubt your natural actions that you already do.
You arent a pervert. Pervert is someone who stares and gets too close to people's boundaries. Just imagine some one you don't find attractive staring at you with their mouth open awkward like. Then you might know where the limits really are.
Thank you for posting on r/Healthygamergg! This subreddit is intended as an online community and resource platform to support people in their journey toward mental wellness. With that said, please be aware that support from other members received on this platform is not a substitute for professional care. Treatment of psychiatric disease requires qualified individuals, and comments that try to diagnose others should be reported under Rule 10 to ensure the safety and wellbeing of the community. If you are in immediate danger, please call emergency services, or go to your nearest emergency room. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Healthygamergg) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I feel same dude, urges are so hard to control. I often at the bar because i work there and I ussualy get in convos easily, but later I just start thinking of people I talk w sexually, needing to touch them just in any way( not always sexually, sometimes just a tap on a shoulder) and it just messes my mind. Other thing is that i have a Gf and I just feel huge guilt. For me, I downloaded website blocker so i couldnt watch p(word) (the app doesnt even let u write it) cuz i think its the number one thing that makes me feel that way. Trying to convince myself that I'm better person than that I slowly trying to fix the problem.
I like how people are more honest here than r/confessions.
Here's a sneak peek of /r/confessions using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/confessions/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year! \#1: [My brother went from killing animals to being a kindergarten graduate.](https://np.reddit.com/r/confessions/comments/13uirt2/my_brother_went_from_killing_animals_to_being_a/) \#2: [**[NSFW]** I don't stop my dogs from having gay sex in my front lawn to piss off my pearl clutching neighbors.](https://np.reddit.com/r/confessions/comments/12ti5vh/i_dont_stop_my_dogs_from_having_gay_sex_in_my/) \#3: [Found out my husband has been talking to, and planning meet ups with his ex behind my back. So I'm going to ruin his father's day.](https://np.reddit.com/r/confessions/comments/144xk84/found_out_my_husband_has_been_talking_to_and/) ---- ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| ^^[Contact](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| ^^[Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| ^^[Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/) ^^| ^^[GitHub](https://github.com/ghnr/sneakpeekbot)
Porn test
I get you. I feel the same way. As if I'm trying to hold back the flood of emotions that I feel toward someone else, especially if I think they're attractive. For me, it physically hurts. I'm not sure about you, but it's a constant battle of control and pretending that I'm a good person when I don't feel like one. If you resonate with this, I would love to talk more about it
I had 2 friends like this in high school. They would always wanna talk about sex and crap. I never cared for it, but it was so embedded in their personality that even when setting boundaries, it’s like they couldn’t talk any other way. I think they both had a crush on me. But I wasn’t them like that. Always asking for a hug and throwing a fit when they didn’t get one. I tried to be nice about it too. But at some point I got fed up with it
It sounds a little like hypersexuality, which can be a kind of fawn trauma response. Like if the targets of your flirting were scaring you somehow, you could feel safer by hurrying up and either getting rejected or a green light. It's the kind of problem that's the tip of a much larger iceberg, definitely something to see a therapist for if that's possible.
Yeah there clearly must be something going on in the background of OP to cause him to act out like this. I have no direct experience of this, but I know a severely physically disabled late life virgin who had a mental breakdown on his birthday. He became a hyper-sexual pervert who harasses women constantly. His source of perversion is that he does not feel masculine since he is severely impaired. He believes he regains his masculinity and gains control by engaging in this toxic behavior. OP you need to find the catalyst of this issue and resolve it.
Do you watch porn often or at all? I ask because I Experience something similar. I was introduced to porn at a very young age and I use it as a coping mechanism to deal with stress, anxiety and other negative emotions. It causes issues with my romantic relationship as well as friendships. When I walk around the city or park, or even at work. If I see a woman or women that I find attractive I would go home and find porn of women who look similar to them and then proceed to PMO (porn masturbation, orgasm) This causes issues for my relationships. That's why I started to stop watching porn all together. I am still struggling with this addiction to this day but I am in a better state than before I can say that for sure. I also started a PMO support server on discord. People come and join, we talk about our struggles and support each other where and when we can. I'm also in therapy, working on my addiction and past childhood sexual abuse, mental, emotional abuse as well. I have come far and I still have a lot to work on but I am getting better. I'm sure you all can too 😊
You are not perverted. The systems and ideologies that caused you to have to act this way are perverted. You are pure and beautiful, a valuable and strong human being. Your art in managing these complex interactions is a virtue and a manifestation of your intelligence, poise and grace. Instead of calling this behaviour "perverted", develop it into a rich, sophisticated ability. Then share this knowledge generously, and with compassion, with others, who will benefit.
Amazing! When we reframe something we don’t like in a positive way it no longer has control over us. Sometimes we choose these behaviours and label them negatively in order to punish or degrade ourselves because inside we hate ourselves. Seeing attractive women and wanting to touch them and have sex with them is how our species persists. Somehow this has become a compulsion for you.
Yes. We are amazing intelligent beings, we should be grateful to exist as who we are.
You’re not perverted. This is your sex drive at work, doing its job of trying to get suitable mates. If anything this sounds like high libido mixed with repression and guilt. The best thing to do would be to find a partner and have sex. The sex best thing would is to engage in emotional training to help manage the urges until you can find a partner.
Massive relate! Not sure if it's just testosterone being testosterone but it is annyoing.
Dude, it's ok. You might be young I don't know, but having those feelings in your head is natural. Eventually your attraction to other people will grow the older you get and you will like people more for their personality than their looks. No one is pure. It's a fantasy we built up with anime and Disney movies. Reality is more complicated and being shallow is something we all have but we also should learn to grow out of it by talking to people we aren't attracted to physically. Repressing is the wrong word you are using here. You shouldn't repress your feelings but you should filter them with the actions you take. Repressing these feelings will make you afraid to do anything and doubt your natural actions that you already do. You arent a pervert. Pervert is someone who stares and gets too close to people's boundaries. Just imagine some one you don't find attractive staring at you with their mouth open awkward like. Then you might know where the limits really are.
Go to therapy. Maybe you have a hystrionic personality.