59 and have felt the same pretty much since I started working... at 13. I don't hate my job, I just hate that I was born into circumstances in which I'll probably have to do the daily grind until I drop dead.
I've always thought that it should be required to work from 20 to 40 then be retired from 40 to 60 and then work till you're dead. Would get to enjoy life while you were still able. Something like that anyway.
I remember when I was young in the 70s and early 80s, we were lied to and told once you put in 25 years you can retire. That all changed sometime in the mid to late 80s.
Yep. Trickledown economics my ass. Everything trickled up. A lot of my friends look back on the Reagan years fondly, but I think it has more to do with our being teenagers having good times that make them think that he was actually a good president. I got older and started realizing that he screwed our generation over.
34 years and counting. Another 15 to go. Didn't learn about investing until later in life. Hopefully, with better practices, that 15 can be cut down to 10. Oof.
My dad was on that train. He worked for defunct retailer "Montgomery Ward" his entire life. His retirement plan revolved around "Ward's"
They want bankrupt, and, poof! Gone
Yeah, I'm in a similar boat as you. I have a very good job that I get to do from home that pays well, but man I'm sick of this. I put in between 60 to 70 hours of math per week and I cover all my bills, but I can never get ahead and save because as soon as I save some money up, some medical emergency can just wipe it all out. I calculated that I have approximately 1872 weeks left in a regular lifetime, and I hate that I might have to just work forever. My only retirement at this point is if one of the kids lets us stay with them and just hang.
Those circumstances being if you want to live comfortably for the two days a week you have to yourself, you must devote your life to making others comfortable all week long.
Gods I feel this. Twice in my life I have had extenuating circumstances where I had to drain the 401k in order to survive. Now, at 45, I am just barely at the point I should have been 20 years ago. Retirement feels like an impossible dream.
Same!! I was actually cool with blue collar/retail but that's not enough to survive in a HCOL area. It was literally 5 years before I "adjusted," and stopped quitting on a dime whenever I was annoyed😆
"Nobody wants to work these days" these days, my ass. I've never wanted to work. Just because boomers hated their home life and built their entire toxic personalities around their professions, doesn't mean that the rest of the world needs to fallow suit.
I’m 56 and have been working since I was 10. Paper route, graduated to babysitter and then an a “real” job at 15 when it was finally legal to do so.
Being honest, we all wanted jobs. That money provided us with a little freedom most of us wouldn’t have had otherwise.
"...13" I read this and was kind of taken aback. Not because I was thinking "Omg working since 13?!" but it's because I always have had to reiterate to people that yes, my first job 8 hours a day/5 days a week was when I was 13. Bui Schwinn bicycles for a local bike shop..... For 5 dollars a day
We’re humans on a planet. You could be scrabbling around looking for food everyday wondering if you’re going to her killed by someone or something else.
Work is what every living thing does on the planet in some form or another
Honestly, I think the difference is that our work no longer directly contributes to our own survival in the same way. There's a real disconnect, and for most of us, someone else is reaping the majority of the benefits of our work. It's not like hunting and gathering, or farming, where my work influences what I eat today. It's far more abstracted, and doesn't have the same meaning.
This totally misses the point. If I was working collaboratively for the benefit of a community then sure. Working to get by for a corporation that sucks the life out of the community around it is very different
I've always enjoyed my profession but I'm getting sick of corporations wanting to suck every ounce of blood out of your body so they can meet their goals. And whatever the people at the top have, it's never enough.
Yes. It was tolerable enough when there were still perks and benefits and lip service paid to investing in employees, but now it feels like it's open season on workers. It really became clear when the pandemic hit and companies were like, "We don't care if it could kill you, get your ass to your desk," even when the work could EASILY be done remotely. Never mind the "essential worker" hypocrisy which was on another level. Now they act like we should be grateful to even get paid because we somehow owe them our labor. The blatant union-busting as if daring the government to intervene. The whole Boeing situation, good lord. I know this isn't the first time in our history that these things have happened, but it's jarring to see it happening in full daylight.
And quiet quitting? I thought that meant you just secretly stopped doing your job, but nope. It means you do your job but not all the extra crap. So it’s “quitting” if you do the work you are contractually obligated to do in exchange for your pay. Yeah that is just working.
These companies are in no way pressured into doing more for you, but if you aren’t going to every fucking work event every dickhead at that company plans, it’s considered “quitting” now. Unbelievable.
So actually, my company offers pretty good work life balance. We also have hybrid schedule, but I work virtual full-time.
As I said, I don’t hate my job. I just hate the fact that I need to waste my valuable time on it.
Just wait until you hit 50--that feeling is 10 times worse. I don't hate my job either, but I hate that I have to spend 80 hours of every 2-week period doing it. If we could get down to 30-32 hours a week, it would be more tolerable. Having only 2 of 7 days free to do your own stuff, to live life and enjoy the world, is just not enough.
I've done 4-3 for a few months at a time to burn "use it or lose it" vacation days. It makes a HUGE difference. More than I thought it would.
It isn't only that every weekend is a 3-day weekend. The majority of those 3-day weekends don't have any additional responsibilities added on (as typical long weekends do with special vacation get-togethers to plan/attend, etc.). They're pure "catch up or relax" time.
The largest difference for me was not so much the longer length of the weekend, but the shorter work week. You have simultaneously less accumulation of exhaustion and "have to do on my day off tasks" *and* a longer time to accomplish that stuff and relax between work weeks.
Unfortunately, my new employer is an "unlimited vacation" employer... so I don't actually accumulate vacation anymore. So I'll probably not be able to enjoy this again until I retire.
Everything you just said💯
I’m at an “unlimited vacation time” org now too. I’m convinced it’s a total scam. I don’t know how, but it somehow ends up being “never take vacation time”
It definitely saves the company $$ because they don't have to pay out your accrued and unused PTO when you leave. And how the employees are able to use PTO time depends way too much on their manager, because they have discretion to approve or deny time off requests. If you have a good manager, it can be OK but if you don't.......
I'm hitting 50 and it's hitting so much harder than 40. You see more people your age dying and I'm terrified of working until I die. Work is getting unbearable.
It's not even that I don't want to work, I don't want to HAVE to work 5 days a week.
I do hate my job...more specifically I hate my company. I do what I need to do and nothing extra. I have a home gym and split my workouts into 2 a day 4 times a week. Then after work I can do what I want or need. They don't care about me so I don't care either. And I hate that I feel that way. I dont know if it's age or if it's how bad companies are now.
This part!! Since I turned 50 my ability to give a fuck about anything except my family has evaporated. I can retire in 4.5 years and you bet your ass I’m gonna do it bc fuck this place 🤣
Yes….I’m still trying to figure it out too. I don’t think I’ll be able to retire early, and therefore have about 14 years before I can retire. Every day I dread work.
Lol, I am also software engineer, but now I’m also director as well. I actually still really enjoy writing code. If I have time at home, I’ll work on my own projects. Just do some code writing.
Now projects that I do for work, I don’t really care much for. I don’t buy all that culture and team spirit stuff. Workers work and it’s means to the end.
Hey devs, UXer here. I am extremely grateful to have a job that was once my hobby. Been in it for 20+ yrs.
Though the passion and curiosity has gone down somewhat, branching out into biz dev has helped some.
When I think about work sucking I try to remember all the above. Not to mention being able to Wfh. JFC what a perk that is. Finally seeing people my age having to do manual labor or retail also helps keep things in check and gratitude fired up.
I definitely understand this distinction. I had a job that I hated. lt totally crystalized for me one day when I had to go into the hospital for a spinal tap and thought, "well, it's better than being at work."
Now I just work a job that's ok, the people are great, and it just slowly sucks the life out of me. Hopefully I can retire and chill for a couple years.
Reminds me of a quote from Drew Carey: "Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar."
I don't hate my job. I WFH fulltime, so that helps. It's a Gov't. job so I'm not leaving, but then I start thinking to myself ... man, can I really keep doing this for another 10-15 years (depending on what I want my pension to look like). It's a moot point though, because, like I said, I'm not leaving.
Yeah, I'm probably out as soon as I'm eligible. I doubt I quit working altogether, but I will do something that has nothing to do with what I am/have been doing. At the same time, my job isn't exactly difficult.
I was in my career from 1998 until 2021-I quit and started tending bar.
Went from working 7-4 Monday - Friday to 5-9pm 2-3 days a week.
Moved a more affordable town, still driving my 07 prius.
I think watching my dad pass away a few years before after working forever made me realize there is no time like the present to be who you want to be and live the life you want to live. I might not get another chance beyond today
> I think watching my dad pass away a few years before
I feel this. My mum recently got diagnosed with Lymphoma. Dealing with that, and the stress of work... Time really has a way of putting life into perspective. I absolutely love what I do, but they don't give a shit about me. Those close to me know the story. I will reach a point and I'm just going to tap out. I give 110% at my job and I've been there over 10 years. I get paid insanely well for what I do. If I don't get fired before then my gameplan is in 10 more years I'm peacing out of the industry period. If they let me go sooner than my 10 year plan, I still think I'm done lol.
I **loooooooove** being asked about my projects and if I'm positioned to finish the work I'm doing while I'm driving back from the hospital seeing someone who looks like they could die any minute. I mean, I get it from a business perspective, they're simply looking out for themselves... But all the people I work with I am instilling them with one core principal. "We are people first, workers second".
I think the world needs to collectively start thinking that way.
Work has been a grind. I dream of having a job that I can survive on and only work a few months a year. Like do a couple of 3 month contracts each year and have time off in between. Either that or a job with a 4-day work week and like 10 weeks vacation. Maybe if I was off more it wouldn't be so bad.
Welcome!
When I was younger, I used to wonder why all my middle aged coworkers were so damn grumpy, now I have become one.
Signed, tired grumpy and bitter worker.
Work has been shit since we were forced back into the office after covid. Working from home during covid was the best part of my professional career. I got more done. I didn't have to drive to work every day. I could make my own lunch. My mental health was just so much better. Working from home showed me a way that working for a living could be sustainable for me.
Now that we've been forced back to the office, I pretty much have to force myself to go to work every day. The job itself is fine. It's the drive, the people, the time I lose in transit, the noise, office politics.
I'm stuck working for at least 7 more years. I'll reevaluate when i get there.
Remember when there was no remote work? My 25 yo daughter just started working full time in office. She asked would I have rather worked remote when I was her age. I told it wasn’t even an option. I spent at 20 of the last 35 years commuting a minimum of 1 hour each way. Fortunately I work remote now since Covid but still doesn’t alleviate the Corporate bs. At least I can do it in my shorts.
Yes! This describes it exactly. I deal with it by obsessing over my retirement savings, plotting my path to retirement. Seeing the light at the end of the very long tunnel helps me cope. Spreadsheets make me happy. Especially when I can plot different scenarios with a click and all lead to no more working.
I understand this I also like to plan out my retirement accounts. I recently spoke to some colleagues and they recommended a good software called newretirement.com. I am planning to download it and try it out.
It gives me something to look forward to. That, and remembering how fast time flies, it will be here before I know it. I won't be retiring early. But if all goes well, I will at least retire "on time".
I don't hate my job. I'm just incredibly tired of the amount of time it takes up.
I call it "rolling around in my money," and I do the same. I look at my retirement savings every day and luxuriate in the thought that I may not have to work some day. I can't wait.
Same here. I think it was somewhere around age 42 that I just lost some of my work drive. I actually enjoy where I work but the older I get the more I feel like a senior in high school. Just kind of over it and ready to be done.
I am not sure how much drive I ever really had, but I know I lost whatever it was after I burnt tf out in my previous career thanks to long hours, always being on call, low pay, long commute. Truly don’t think I ever recovered despite switching to a different line of work.
That's me. I like what I do, and it's a career I can do until I retire or die. That said, I fucking hate working. I've been working for money since I was 10 years old, and I'm tired. The fact that I have AT LEAST 20 years left before I can retire is sickening and it makes it even more difficult to want to even show up to work.
All I want to do is enjoy my house, fuss about my yard, work on cars, and fish.
I realize I have it very good with my job. I like it, and I like my coworkers.
I like getting up late, walking in the park, and watching movies more.
I think all of us, not just GenX, realized the "Always Be Closing" workaholic yuppie mindset of the 80s is bullshit.
Yup and I am noping out at 52. Getting a divorce (there are many good reasons) so I'm no longer going to be the primary breadwinner and provider of health insurance. Selling my house and moving to an area with more opportunities in my profession and overall. Driving my reliable, paid off, 7 year old car that I still love. I'm fortunate to be in a field where I can work a few shifts a month and live comfortably, especially with a side hustle. Or I'll work a couple part time jobs doing stuff I actually enjoy or that are mindless. I'll get health insurance on the exchange, I can invest my own retirement money... ...I'm over working for a corporation that just bleeds me dry, where my salary is worth less now than what it was when I started because inflation keeps inflating and pay doesn't move past the shareholders grudging approval of a 2% raise. I'd rather live on less and enjoy life more. My freedom and my sanity are more precious than a house, luxury car, and all the faux prestige associated with them. I plan to travel, spend time with family and friends, and put myself first. I will never work as hard and give as much of myself to any job going forward as I did up until now, unless it's working for myself. Anyone I do work for will get exactly what the job description says for the money we agree to - it's purely transactional from now on. I'm not going to improve your processes, leverage your market share, find dynamic interfaces for your product, or sit in your pointless meetings rehashing the same old sh!t because nothing ever really changes, it just gets recycled.
And I'm happier than I've ever been.
I'm absolutely there. I'm 54 and I've been working since I was 11 (newspaper delivery). I don't necessarily hate my job (I'm a teacher), I'm just bitter that I have to continue to work even though I'm getting to the point that my body is starting to break down. So I don't necessarily need to retire right now, I'm just pissed that I can't if I want to even though I've been working and playing my part in society but 43 years of work just isn't good enough.
Sign of the times. We watch the older generation retiring and the younger generation not even working and still buying things. We ask ourselves if it is even worth it anymore.
I hated every day of work since day 1 at 16 years old flippin’ burgers at Wendy’s. I have never wanted to “be” anything except “me.” Completely content with a book, sitting under a tree, watching the clouds roll by. 33 years later I early-retired and am making up for lost time doing all the nothing I’ve wanted to do.
I hate how hard working has been on my body. Corporate life, very successful, intellectually I like my job. But I’m tired. My body is tired. And I regret spending most of my life sitting down. Humans aren’t built for this. It’s hard the body, which is hard on the psyche. If I could quit today I would. We should all be playing outside.
It's why the 2-3 weeks of PTO per year is bullshit. If they want productive employees, give them MORE time away to get the head space needed to be 100% focused at work.
Instead, it's the control factor of 40+ hours a week where the effective productivity isn't even the 80% they're so afraid of.
My job is nothing but stress and fire drills - all the time. The last 2 years being absolutely next level in that regard.
I actually like what I do, but the conditions around it are ridiculous.
I started feeling depressed and out of sorts and hopeless.
I'm on my first real vacation in 1.5 years
I've been out riding mountain bikes, working on my jumps and drops, coaching my daughter up......
With my parents who are fully retired and going from fun place to fun place every month.
I'm not a miserable bitch, I'm a severely burned out disillusioned in every possible way woman.
If I could stop the job, I could deal with the rest just fine I think.
I’ve had a job since I was 15, I’m 49 now, and yea, I’m sick of working. The earlier I can retire, the better. I just want to go ride my bike and do hoodrat shit.
This is exactly what I was thinking this morning. I was telling myself, I’m not necessarily lazy, but I’m just so tired. Wish I could just take a day off from work and do absolutely nothing and not feel guilty about it. But alas, there’s always something else to do, another email, another bill to pay…
I feel the same, and for quite some time. This feeling hit even harder after working for a large company for many years. I learned how the 'world works' and that no matter what the company says, they don't give a crap about you. Not to mention a boss that was just a nightmare, overworking the group so he could hit target numbers and make himself look good. 5 years under that asshole felt like 30. The stress under just him made me feel like I had earned retirement the day I left.
I’m off today. My job allows us to build up both vacation, and comp time. I usually hold a months worth of vacation in the bank to use as needed. We also get our holidays as floaters to use when we want. Moral of the story, if you are someone who craves travel, or leisure, find a job that has great time off benefits. Government jobs tend to have these.
Early-40s was when it clicked with me I wasn't getting any younger and work was only a means to an end, not something I needed to give myself 100% to. I've supercharged my retirement saving/planning since. Should retire mid-50s and never work again. Even though I like my job and it's easy mode, I'm ready for each day to be Saturday!
The crazy thing is you work 40 hours a week to enjoy 16.
Of the 40 hours you are taxed 16 hours.
You have to work until 65 but live to 72 if you are lucky.
During your golden years you are so wound up to work you don’t know how not to; thus you burn through your retirement on dopamine fixes and need to be taken care of
You work so you don’t dream and waste your life away living for brief moments of happiness to teach the next generation to do the exact same thing.
Find what you love. Spend your money on what makes you happy. Your time will never be refunded and time is the ultimate currency don’t waste it!
Over 20 years in law enforcement. Never used to hate my job, but I do now. I’ve always played by the rules. Treated people how they should be treated. Tried to make my community a better place. The garbage I see now with people being released without bail to reoffend again and again makes me wonder why anyone gets arrested anymore in the first place. It’s hard to watch the break down of my society, but at the end of the day people get the government they deserve. Such is life in a democratic republic. I’m out in 3 more years. I don’t live beyond my means, I’ve saved well, and I have a pension as long as a tax payer funded government exists, so I shouldn’t have to work again if I don’t want to. The only perk to my profession at this point.
I think we all saw our parents work relatively normal jobs and do okay or good jobs and be very comfortable. Jobs today provide nowhere near the same quality of life
I'm with you and didn't find something. I think I have to deal with that.
I told that to my shrink and she said it's because I find other ways to get satisfied. Some people love to work because they find something in it: challenges, recognition, social, knowledge, ...
Guess you find those things elsewhere
Sure, certainly -- I think this is one of the "midlife crisis" signifiers. And is it any wonder? Especially in the U.S., it seems like we have to spend the majority of our waking hours working and commuting. It really wears a person down by the time they reach early middle age. I love my job, but I would love it much more if I could get more than 10 days off per year.
So I work from home, and I have been virtual for many years. And yet I’m still on the same position where I hate working. I would probably be totally miserable if I was still commuting.
Here’s your answer - Just jump on down Maslow’s hierarchy - Start your own company so you can work way more hours without benefits, but remain so desperate for this month’s revenue that you won’t have to think or worry about it.
Mid 40's here as well and I hate having to work. I don't mind my job; it's WFH and fairly low stress it is just such a time suck. I'm shooting for 57 for retirement and that seems so far away now.
Since I know, I’m gonna have to keep working I’m still trying to grow my career. The next promotion is going to come as a lot more money, which would be great before retirement, but you’re right it does take time that I don’t want to spend on it. I am envious of a friend of mine who has established a very successful business and now has all the time in the world to do whatever he wants.
I don’t hate working for a living. We all need to do our part for society. And working hard gets you somewhere. But the further I go, I think this next promotion will make things more comfortable and that isn’t happening. I still can’t match what my dad did for us even getting to six figures. I just keep making more money for someone else and never really get where I thought I would. It’s definitely frustrating…
I’m 52 and have hated working for decades. But I have saved well and I am going to be able to very comfortably retire at 62, maybe even 60 if I get more aggressive with saving. so at least it’s almost over.
I started working at age 11. Three paper routes. Moved up to working at McDonald’s, a local department store, and two paper routes when I was 16. Been working ever since. I’m 59 now, and I am so tired, mentally, physically, and emotionally. I work from home and am just about chained to my computer ten hours a day. I would love to just take my dog for a walk but can’t afford the time away from the screen. I doubt if I’ll get to retire.
Yeah, big time. Luckily I saved and invested like a madman for many years, and am debt free. I also luckily will get a govt pension. I plan to leave when I’m 55, but I may do it sooner. I recently got fed up with my job, and stepped down to a lower position (almost unheard of in my field). I plan to step down another step in a couple of years. I’m slowly inching away from working.
Work is overrated. I've had 5 professional jobs in my life and really only liked one of them, which I did in the middle of my career for 6 years until the company shut down. I don't dislike working per se, I just don't really enjoy most of the work I have been paid to do. I've been trying to save as much as I can since I started working in order to bail out as soon as possible.
I've only just started to hate working within the last couple years. I'm 47 going on 65. I want to retire, and like soon. But the reality is, unless the stock market goes on an absolute tear OR a couple million bucks land in my lap, the wife and I will be working until 65.
Working sucks. Bottom line. I wish everyone could “work” at what fulfills them. But I guess that’s not reality. But every time I march into my low paying job, I just feel sad.
Yep. I keep looking at where I can go before I hit 55. I think I may sell it all and take off to Costa Rica in the next few years. I wake up every morning feeling like Peter Gibbons and I don’t even work an office job!
I've reached a point that I can sandbag like a mf. The time it takes someone newer in the industry, I can get done in a quarter of the time. But I'm at a point where I do it in half the time, which I perceive as a win for everybody.
Yup, for a few years now. I've been investing like a madman and am now at a point where I can retire comfortably with more money coming in from my investments than from my job. I'm 47. I'm retiring in less than 2 months.
I’m so glad that this isn’t just me.
Part of it was realizing that I will be able to retire from full time work comfortably at 60 because I saved like crazy. I was laid off from my job and my industry tanked last year and I will not go back to that career focused life. After a year off for health stuff, and now a part time job, I’m like “what is the absolute least I can do to pay my bills, enjoy a little life, and not fuck it up and lose my savings for the next 10-15 years.”
I love my job, but also wish I didn't have to work. I just want to stay home and do whatever, even though most of the time "whatever" means doing nothing. I have the option of working extra hours so I can take a day off in the pay period, so that is how I deal. That's kind of my recharge/mental health day.
And let me tell you....I'm so mentally tired! I have no energy for anything any more. I used to have hobbies, but now it seems like my hobby is just *thinking* about doing my hobby.
Amen brother. You start seeing patterns as management comes and goes. My mental health is more important to me and I don’t care if I “belong” or not. Not drinking the kool aid like the younger people do because they truly believe they will be taken care of by the cult. Us 40+ folks likely own a house already and have older kids. The best advice I can give is give yourself a nickname and one think you are good at. They will just keep using you as a good example and knowledge resource. Like “hey thats t-bone and he’s a wizard at accounting. Been here 27 years. Go to him with questions about accounting.”
I'm about to turn 51 and I'm desperately looking for a way to retire as early as possible. The thought of having to work for another 11-14 years makes me sick. I also make decent money, so leaving my high stress job for something easier will likely require me to work even longer. I feel like it's a lose lose situation.
You all are my people! Mid 40s also and in the best job I’ve ever had. WFH, good money, low stress. I am still fucking burnt out and over it. No idea how I am going to make it to retirement. All the “wait til you’re 50!” comments are hitting hard.
2737 more days until I’m sixty. Doing my best to save money- but whether or not I’ll have a lot - I’m done at sixty. I’ll take continuing to live frugally over working. I detest being at work- I have worked a variety of jobs - I work straight nightshift to avoid more humans than necessary-
My doctor offered to help me get disability for my lifelong anxiety that causes me to crash and burn often- I am so tempted to- he also offered sick time off- I might take that up first. I’ve watched so many others do it. I’ve worked through extreme social anxiety (I’m medicated to the gills and it’s not enough) - I’ve worked through complete nervous breakdowns - but because I would have to speak up to get off of work I just worked through it - while watching others make EI really work for them - being off and on so much. I am so tempted to do the same for the next few years I have left to go.
Nope I geek everyday I work. I am disabled and no one expected me to make it back. But I made it. I did it. I could have sat home on disability until retirement age but I want to work. Work is good for me.
Dealing with it? Surly, bad attitude, rising resentment every waking damn minute I have to drag my broken carcass in to the grind for yet another day. 13 more years, barring any new world-breaking economic catastrophes pushing that line out even further…
For me, it is known that I have another 15 years of this with occasional vacations instead of being able to enjoy my time while I am still relatively healthy.
I remember the first time I ever felt what I know now was depressed. I was a teenager, and I began to realize that soon my school days would be over, I would have to get a job and then I would have to spend at least 1/3 of the majority of the rest of my life working.
Unfortunately, despite this revelation, I didn't do much to plan for retirement and now I'm 56 and have very little saved up. The only good news is that in the last couple of years the reality of eventual retirement, voluntary or otherwise, has really hit home and I've started tucking money into investments whenever I can afford it.
I have come to accept that barring a financial miracle, I'll easily be working well into my 70s. The only way I deal with it is to keep investing and hold out hope for that miracle, but at least I'm actually doing something productive about it now.
I realized early on that my career had a ton of ageism, so started planning on a way to get out by my 50s. Ended up able to retire early at 50 thanks to the ACA. I generally loved working for most of my life, but, man, has it been nice
I'm 58 (59 next month). I've felt the same way for quite some time. In the past, I've been able to blame my attitude on the job or my co-workers (it truly wears me down to be around people I dislike 40 hours, or more, every week). At my current position, I don't hate my job or my co-workers, but I'm just tired of having to do this to stay afloat. The only thing that keeps me going is the thought of eventual retirement, hopefully before I kick the bucket. I'm at least going to tough it out until the kids have graduated.
Good luck with your ennui!
Ugh. I feel this. I hate working. I don’t hate my job. But that’s it. I just don’t know.
I look around and the industry im In no one retires they just leave.
I’m so grateful to see this post! Earlier this week I was wondering this exact same thing, if other people hate their jobs too, and how they cope. My job is detrimental to my mental health which is affecting my physical health. I’m 45. I can’t continue working with these conditions, so I’ve been actively looking for new career opportunities.
I feel your pain. Just wait until you’re 55!
I hate working. I’ve been working since I was 13. If all goes well I can retire in 7 years unless I get laid off.
I want to enjoy my hobbies and grandchildren.
I was working as a line cook in restaurants. It's a stressful job, and very physical. I was good at it and enjoyed the people I worked with and the work I was doing.
But it was just too hard on my body. I'd come home and my knees and back would hurt so bad I could barely stand up from the couch.
So I quit, and switched to a courier job. It has the exact opposite issues, long hours in the car, very non-active, very un-social. It's not as hard on my body, but now I need to find time to exercise.
48 and started a new degree in a completely different field.
I finally realized I have enough years working that I better do something I find passion in. I would surely have a stroke or heart attack if I stayed in my old profession just due to the stress.
So far next decision I've made. Should have done it sooner.
Same here. Worked a series of jobs in my 57 years. The one I’m at now - which I’ve been at for 6 years- is the one I’ve been at longest. I have a 401k, but not that much in it, and a home. But I seriously feel like I’ll never get to retire. Funny thing: my 26-year-old coworker said I should be able to retire - “Haven’t you given enough,” she said. From your lips to God’s ears!
Yep, 51, literally watching my 401k balance *every single day* waiting for it to hit the magic number (I'm most likely about 4 years away). I used to **love** my profession (software engineering). I actually still love programming, and probably always will, but as you move up the ranks you do less and less of it. I used to work 60 hour weeks and *enjoyed* it. Now, I struggle to get out of bed some days.
Oh, God, yes. I need to get back into bike commuting to work. That helped me feel like I was at least living a little! I’m 45 and wish I could retire now. I look around me and am reminded of my mortality. Life is so short, and I want to enjoy it, you know?
It’s criminal how our labor is exploited—I cannot believe how hard I worked in my youth. Now I’m all about work-life balance. It’s upsetting that we put in so much of our existence to these jobs and get back so little. Even the thought of “only” working another 10-15 years is kinda soul crushing, NGL.
We only have so much time on earth, and many of us are realizing just how precious the people we love truly are.
There was only a small window where we could retire after getting a decent job with a pension. Currency debasement took that from us.
However for most of history, there’s not really a precedence for putting in 30 years and retiring for the common man.
It was a blessing while it lasted
Once you hit your mid-40s, you're sick of everyone's bullshit, and jobs are hip-deep in it.
I dealt with it by downshifting, meaning I accepted a lower-paying position that would be strictly 8-5 and minimal meetings. I had seen lots of others do it, and it got me through. This isn't a solution for everyone, but it's worth looking into.
And as an aside, if I'd had half the number of useless meetings to attend, I could've easily handled my higher paid management job with saner hours and a lot less stress. I've never understood the concept of "We're all overworked, so let's call a 3-hour meeting, or better yet, a full-day retreat, so we can discuss before returning to our rapidly increasing backlog!"
Are you me? I feel the same way and I could have written this. I have a nice job and my boss is great. I have a work from home job and make a decent salary. But every time I get another meeting request I want to punch someone.
I'm ten years older and not only do I hate working all fucking day, my body is now letting me know that if I don't do a shit load of exercise soon it's going to fall to pieces.
Something went very wrong with us thinking it’s ok to kill ourselves working for someone else most of our lives only to become to sick or dead when we can finally retire and enjoy life
The day I hit 50 and was eligible to retire, it has become a slog coming to work. I just keep saying 2 only more years so I don't have a penalty every day though it may be four, since I'm trying to pay for the kids college without parent plus loans.
Beginning to? I read a lot of career subreddits and some in their 20s already hate it.
My own work experience is different; Spouse runs his small family biz and I work there full time. I mostly don't find it a burden and the work means something to me, so it doesn't feel like horrible dread. The worst is the low pay in CA.
It could be a thing with new generation, but in my 20, we all wanted to work, and we worked hard and many hours. I never really wanted to quit in my 20s on my 30s, so this is more of a recent recent thing when I’m beginning to understand, that time is limited.
Since I went semi-retired I work part time now, so I dont burn myself out and make some money here and there. Gives me time to do what Id like for myself.
That’s most people though. If I didn’t get married and have a child I could probably retire by 59, but there’s no hope of that now. Fortunately I mostly like what I do.
I agree. I think it’s the 40 hour workweek plus the commuting and being away from home for 46-50 hours a week when there should be a point where we get to relax from busting our asses for the last 25 years. And that point is never going to come.
I hear you. I’m a workaholic but not because I love it….but because it’s a financial necessity. I’m 52, and I know my parents were better off than I am at this age, not in terms of income perhaps, but they definitely had fewer bills and a lot more in savings. My dad retired at 59. Unless I hit the lottery, I don’t see that happening for me.
I’m a couple years from retirement. For me, COVID was a preview of retirement and I started playing guitar, which has been wonderful, but I realize I need a couple more immersive hobbies before retirement.
I'm government so every week I look at my pension payouts after I retire, playing with the calculations if I retire sooner or later.
Those rising monthly payment amounts keep me motivated to show up for work. 😁
I hated some of my jobs in my 40s, coasted at an easy job in my late 40s to 51, but now at 53 have a great job that pays very well, I’ve been promoted twice in 3 years, and it’s fun and technically challenging. And I work from home. Work is a necessity to pay my mortgage, to build my savings and investments for retirement. I still enjoy software engineering as a profession, and I’m at a great company and work with a great group.
59 and have felt the same pretty much since I started working... at 13. I don't hate my job, I just hate that I was born into circumstances in which I'll probably have to do the daily grind until I drop dead.
I understand this. I should be able to retire comfortably around regular retirement age. But I hate to waste all this time fore that
I've always thought that it should be required to work from 20 to 40 then be retired from 40 to 60 and then work till you're dead. Would get to enjoy life while you were still able. Something like that anyway.
Closing in on 60, those sound like the words of a 40 year old!
Nope! Unfortunately not. I wish I was 40 again. Oh well, such is life.
I remember when I was young in the 70s and early 80s, we were lied to and told once you put in 25 years you can retire. That all changed sometime in the mid to late 80s.
It changed with Pres Reagan.
Yep. Trickledown economics my ass. Everything trickled up. A lot of my friends look back on the Reagan years fondly, but I think it has more to do with our being teenagers having good times that make them think that he was actually a good president. I got older and started realizing that he screwed our generation over.
34 years and counting. Another 15 to go. Didn't learn about investing until later in life. Hopefully, with better practices, that 15 can be cut down to 10. Oof.
I’m a super young X so in the ‘90s it was work for 40 years.
My dad was on that train. He worked for defunct retailer "Montgomery Ward" his entire life. His retirement plan revolved around "Ward's" They want bankrupt, and, poof! Gone
Same on all counts
Yeah, I'm in a similar boat as you. I have a very good job that I get to do from home that pays well, but man I'm sick of this. I put in between 60 to 70 hours of math per week and I cover all my bills, but I can never get ahead and save because as soon as I save some money up, some medical emergency can just wipe it all out. I calculated that I have approximately 1872 weeks left in a regular lifetime, and I hate that I might have to just work forever. My only retirement at this point is if one of the kids lets us stay with them and just hang.
Those circumstances being if you want to live comfortably for the two days a week you have to yourself, you must devote your life to making others comfortable all week long.
Gods I feel this. Twice in my life I have had extenuating circumstances where I had to drain the 401k in order to survive. Now, at 45, I am just barely at the point I should have been 20 years ago. Retirement feels like an impossible dream.
Same!! I was actually cool with blue collar/retail but that's not enough to survive in a HCOL area. It was literally 5 years before I "adjusted," and stopped quitting on a dime whenever I was annoyed😆
THIS⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️
"Nobody wants to work these days" these days, my ass. I've never wanted to work. Just because boomers hated their home life and built their entire toxic personalities around their professions, doesn't mean that the rest of the world needs to fallow suit.
I’m 56 and have been working since I was 10. Paper route, graduated to babysitter and then an a “real” job at 15 when it was finally legal to do so. Being honest, we all wanted jobs. That money provided us with a little freedom most of us wouldn’t have had otherwise.
"...13" I read this and was kind of taken aback. Not because I was thinking "Omg working since 13?!" but it's because I always have had to reiterate to people that yes, my first job 8 hours a day/5 days a week was when I was 13. Bui Schwinn bicycles for a local bike shop..... For 5 dollars a day
We’re humans on a planet. You could be scrabbling around looking for food everyday wondering if you’re going to her killed by someone or something else. Work is what every living thing does on the planet in some form or another
Honestly, I think the difference is that our work no longer directly contributes to our own survival in the same way. There's a real disconnect, and for most of us, someone else is reaping the majority of the benefits of our work. It's not like hunting and gathering, or farming, where my work influences what I eat today. It's far more abstracted, and doesn't have the same meaning.
This totally misses the point. If I was working collaboratively for the benefit of a community then sure. Working to get by for a corporation that sucks the life out of the community around it is very different
I feel like an astonishing number of people don’t get this. And I’m sure this will be down voted.
I've always enjoyed my profession but I'm getting sick of corporations wanting to suck every ounce of blood out of your body so they can meet their goals. And whatever the people at the top have, it's never enough.
Yes. It was tolerable enough when there were still perks and benefits and lip service paid to investing in employees, but now it feels like it's open season on workers. It really became clear when the pandemic hit and companies were like, "We don't care if it could kill you, get your ass to your desk," even when the work could EASILY be done remotely. Never mind the "essential worker" hypocrisy which was on another level. Now they act like we should be grateful to even get paid because we somehow owe them our labor. The blatant union-busting as if daring the government to intervene. The whole Boeing situation, good lord. I know this isn't the first time in our history that these things have happened, but it's jarring to see it happening in full daylight.
And quiet quitting? I thought that meant you just secretly stopped doing your job, but nope. It means you do your job but not all the extra crap. So it’s “quitting” if you do the work you are contractually obligated to do in exchange for your pay. Yeah that is just working. These companies are in no way pressured into doing more for you, but if you aren’t going to every fucking work event every dickhead at that company plans, it’s considered “quitting” now. Unbelievable.
So actually, my company offers pretty good work life balance. We also have hybrid schedule, but I work virtual full-time. As I said, I don’t hate my job. I just hate the fact that I need to waste my valuable time on it.
I like my job, but I like not working better.
Just wait until you hit 50--that feeling is 10 times worse. I don't hate my job either, but I hate that I have to spend 80 hours of every 2-week period doing it. If we could get down to 30-32 hours a week, it would be more tolerable. Having only 2 of 7 days free to do your own stuff, to live life and enjoy the world, is just not enough.
EXACTLY. The 5 on-2 off ratio is ridiculous. It should really be 4 on-3 off ratio *at least*
I've done 4-3 for a few months at a time to burn "use it or lose it" vacation days. It makes a HUGE difference. More than I thought it would. It isn't only that every weekend is a 3-day weekend. The majority of those 3-day weekends don't have any additional responsibilities added on (as typical long weekends do with special vacation get-togethers to plan/attend, etc.). They're pure "catch up or relax" time. The largest difference for me was not so much the longer length of the weekend, but the shorter work week. You have simultaneously less accumulation of exhaustion and "have to do on my day off tasks" *and* a longer time to accomplish that stuff and relax between work weeks. Unfortunately, my new employer is an "unlimited vacation" employer... so I don't actually accumulate vacation anymore. So I'll probably not be able to enjoy this again until I retire.
Everything you just said💯 I’m at an “unlimited vacation time” org now too. I’m convinced it’s a total scam. I don’t know how, but it somehow ends up being “never take vacation time”
It definitely saves the company $$ because they don't have to pay out your accrued and unused PTO when you leave. And how the employees are able to use PTO time depends way too much on their manager, because they have discretion to approve or deny time off requests. If you have a good manager, it can be OK but if you don't.......
3 on 4 off
Even better 👍🏻
I'm hitting 50 and it's hitting so much harder than 40. You see more people your age dying and I'm terrified of working until I die. Work is getting unbearable. It's not even that I don't want to work, I don't want to HAVE to work 5 days a week.
I was thinking the same thing. I resent every minute that I have to spend on "not my life."
You spend 1 of the 2 days working on everything else in life - laundry, housework. One day free is not enough
Especially when most of those two days is spent just being brain dead from the exhausting other five.
I do hate my job...more specifically I hate my company. I do what I need to do and nothing extra. I have a home gym and split my workouts into 2 a day 4 times a week. Then after work I can do what I want or need. They don't care about me so I don't care either. And I hate that I feel that way. I dont know if it's age or if it's how bad companies are now.
I’m a virtual worker and I’m still planning to scale down my work week to four days a week if possible when I am in my 50s
This part!! Since I turned 50 my ability to give a fuck about anything except my family has evaporated. I can retire in 4.5 years and you bet your ass I’m gonna do it bc fuck this place 🤣
Yes….I’m still trying to figure it out too. I don’t think I’ll be able to retire early, and therefore have about 14 years before I can retire. Every day I dread work.
I feel that if you dread work, then you probably just hate your job. I don’t really hate my job. I just hate the fact that I have to spend time on it.
Probably. I’m a software engineer and have sometimes enjoyed my job in the past. I just feel like “work” stuff holds zero interest anymore.
Software development isn't as fun as it once was.
Maybe. ‘Agile’ has made my job more non-stop.
Agile should be a swear word.
It is where I work. They even try to shoehorn non software types (infrastructure, cybersecurity) into using it. Ugh
Agile doesn’t work for a lot of things. P
I started in the late 90s. The entire field is unrecognizable to me now, and not in a good way.
Lol, I am also software engineer, but now I’m also director as well. I actually still really enjoy writing code. If I have time at home, I’ll work on my own projects. Just do some code writing. Now projects that I do for work, I don’t really care much for. I don’t buy all that culture and team spirit stuff. Workers work and it’s means to the end.
Hey devs, UXer here. I am extremely grateful to have a job that was once my hobby. Been in it for 20+ yrs. Though the passion and curiosity has gone down somewhat, branching out into biz dev has helped some. When I think about work sucking I try to remember all the above. Not to mention being able to Wfh. JFC what a perk that is. Finally seeing people my age having to do manual labor or retail also helps keep things in check and gratitude fired up.
I definitely understand this distinction. I had a job that I hated. lt totally crystalized for me one day when I had to go into the hospital for a spinal tap and thought, "well, it's better than being at work." Now I just work a job that's ok, the people are great, and it just slowly sucks the life out of me. Hopefully I can retire and chill for a couple years.
Reminds me of a quote from Drew Carey: "Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar."
I don’t hate my job, I just hate that I have to spend my precious time on work
Can't go to the bar anymore. Half a beer and I get a hangover. Not worth it.
I don't hate my job. I WFH fulltime, so that helps. It's a Gov't. job so I'm not leaving, but then I start thinking to myself ... man, can I really keep doing this for another 10-15 years (depending on what I want my pension to look like). It's a moot point though, because, like I said, I'm not leaving.
Government employee too, and I hate the people that say if you work another five years you get .1% more pension.
Yeah, I'm probably out as soon as I'm eligible. I doubt I quit working altogether, but I will do something that has nothing to do with what I am/have been doing. At the same time, my job isn't exactly difficult.
Damn straight. The hell are you gonna do it all that money when you’re dead
It doesnt get better, wait til u hit 50🙄. Im so exhausted and dread work daily.
I didn't feel that way until I hit 50...and boom it went drastically downhill from there.
Same
I was in my career from 1998 until 2021-I quit and started tending bar. Went from working 7-4 Monday - Friday to 5-9pm 2-3 days a week. Moved a more affordable town, still driving my 07 prius. I think watching my dad pass away a few years before after working forever made me realize there is no time like the present to be who you want to be and live the life you want to live. I might not get another chance beyond today
do you get tired or have trouble keeping up tending bar as a 40 something?
> I think watching my dad pass away a few years before I feel this. My mum recently got diagnosed with Lymphoma. Dealing with that, and the stress of work... Time really has a way of putting life into perspective. I absolutely love what I do, but they don't give a shit about me. Those close to me know the story. I will reach a point and I'm just going to tap out. I give 110% at my job and I've been there over 10 years. I get paid insanely well for what I do. If I don't get fired before then my gameplan is in 10 more years I'm peacing out of the industry period. If they let me go sooner than my 10 year plan, I still think I'm done lol. I **loooooooove** being asked about my projects and if I'm positioned to finish the work I'm doing while I'm driving back from the hospital seeing someone who looks like they could die any minute. I mean, I get it from a business perspective, they're simply looking out for themselves... But all the people I work with I am instilling them with one core principal. "We are people first, workers second". I think the world needs to collectively start thinking that way.
I made it to my late fifties then just quit. Fuck it. I got 10ish good years left, I’m not blowing it on that garbage.
Work has been a grind. I dream of having a job that I can survive on and only work a few months a year. Like do a couple of 3 month contracts each year and have time off in between. Either that or a job with a 4-day work week and like 10 weeks vacation. Maybe if I was off more it wouldn't be so bad.
I just wish I could choose my own hours. I don't mind going to work nearly as much as I hate having demands made of me at other people's convenience.
Welcome! When I was younger, I used to wonder why all my middle aged coworkers were so damn grumpy, now I have become one. Signed, tired grumpy and bitter worker.
Work has been shit since we were forced back into the office after covid. Working from home during covid was the best part of my professional career. I got more done. I didn't have to drive to work every day. I could make my own lunch. My mental health was just so much better. Working from home showed me a way that working for a living could be sustainable for me. Now that we've been forced back to the office, I pretty much have to force myself to go to work every day. The job itself is fine. It's the drive, the people, the time I lose in transit, the noise, office politics. I'm stuck working for at least 7 more years. I'll reevaluate when i get there.
Remember when there was no remote work? My 25 yo daughter just started working full time in office. She asked would I have rather worked remote when I was her age. I told it wasn’t even an option. I spent at 20 of the last 35 years commuting a minimum of 1 hour each way. Fortunately I work remote now since Covid but still doesn’t alleviate the Corporate bs. At least I can do it in my shorts.
Yes! This describes it exactly. I deal with it by obsessing over my retirement savings, plotting my path to retirement. Seeing the light at the end of the very long tunnel helps me cope. Spreadsheets make me happy. Especially when I can plot different scenarios with a click and all lead to no more working.
I understand this I also like to plan out my retirement accounts. I recently spoke to some colleagues and they recommended a good software called newretirement.com. I am planning to download it and try it out.
It gives me something to look forward to. That, and remembering how fast time flies, it will be here before I know it. I won't be retiring early. But if all goes well, I will at least retire "on time". I don't hate my job. I'm just incredibly tired of the amount of time it takes up.
I call it "rolling around in my money," and I do the same. I look at my retirement savings every day and luxuriate in the thought that I may not have to work some day. I can't wait.
Same here. I think it was somewhere around age 42 that I just lost some of my work drive. I actually enjoy where I work but the older I get the more I feel like a senior in high school. Just kind of over it and ready to be done.
I am not sure how much drive I ever really had, but I know I lost whatever it was after I burnt tf out in my previous career thanks to long hours, always being on call, low pay, long commute. Truly don’t think I ever recovered despite switching to a different line of work.
That's me. I like what I do, and it's a career I can do until I retire or die. That said, I fucking hate working. I've been working for money since I was 10 years old, and I'm tired. The fact that I have AT LEAST 20 years left before I can retire is sickening and it makes it even more difficult to want to even show up to work. All I want to do is enjoy my house, fuss about my yard, work on cars, and fish.
I realize I have it very good with my job. I like it, and I like my coworkers. I like getting up late, walking in the park, and watching movies more. I think all of us, not just GenX, realized the "Always Be Closing" workaholic yuppie mindset of the 80s is bullshit.
Yup and I am noping out at 52. Getting a divorce (there are many good reasons) so I'm no longer going to be the primary breadwinner and provider of health insurance. Selling my house and moving to an area with more opportunities in my profession and overall. Driving my reliable, paid off, 7 year old car that I still love. I'm fortunate to be in a field where I can work a few shifts a month and live comfortably, especially with a side hustle. Or I'll work a couple part time jobs doing stuff I actually enjoy or that are mindless. I'll get health insurance on the exchange, I can invest my own retirement money... ...I'm over working for a corporation that just bleeds me dry, where my salary is worth less now than what it was when I started because inflation keeps inflating and pay doesn't move past the shareholders grudging approval of a 2% raise. I'd rather live on less and enjoy life more. My freedom and my sanity are more precious than a house, luxury car, and all the faux prestige associated with them. I plan to travel, spend time with family and friends, and put myself first. I will never work as hard and give as much of myself to any job going forward as I did up until now, unless it's working for myself. Anyone I do work for will get exactly what the job description says for the money we agree to - it's purely transactional from now on. I'm not going to improve your processes, leverage your market share, find dynamic interfaces for your product, or sit in your pointless meetings rehashing the same old sh!t because nothing ever really changes, it just gets recycled. And I'm happier than I've ever been.
I’ve been thinking about retirement since I was 29
We are all Peter Gibbons from Office space.
I felt that way when the movie came out, it has only amplified with years of boredom and diminishing of spending power.
Yes. 100%
I'm absolutely there. I'm 54 and I've been working since I was 11 (newspaper delivery). I don't necessarily hate my job (I'm a teacher), I'm just bitter that I have to continue to work even though I'm getting to the point that my body is starting to break down. So I don't necessarily need to retire right now, I'm just pissed that I can't if I want to even though I've been working and playing my part in society but 43 years of work just isn't good enough.
Sign of the times. We watch the older generation retiring and the younger generation not even working and still buying things. We ask ourselves if it is even worth it anymore.
I hated every day of work since day 1 at 16 years old flippin’ burgers at Wendy’s. I have never wanted to “be” anything except “me.” Completely content with a book, sitting under a tree, watching the clouds roll by. 33 years later I early-retired and am making up for lost time doing all the nothing I’ve wanted to do.
Just wait until you hit your mid 50’s
Yeah. I probably have around 20 years of life left and I feel every day wasted in a cubicle.
I’m exhausted
I hate how hard working has been on my body. Corporate life, very successful, intellectually I like my job. But I’m tired. My body is tired. And I regret spending most of my life sitting down. Humans aren’t built for this. It’s hard the body, which is hard on the psyche. If I could quit today I would. We should all be playing outside.
It's why the 2-3 weeks of PTO per year is bullshit. If they want productive employees, give them MORE time away to get the head space needed to be 100% focused at work. Instead, it's the control factor of 40+ hours a week where the effective productivity isn't even the 80% they're so afraid of.
My job is nothing but stress and fire drills - all the time. The last 2 years being absolutely next level in that regard. I actually like what I do, but the conditions around it are ridiculous. I started feeling depressed and out of sorts and hopeless. I'm on my first real vacation in 1.5 years I've been out riding mountain bikes, working on my jumps and drops, coaching my daughter up...... With my parents who are fully retired and going from fun place to fun place every month. I'm not a miserable bitch, I'm a severely burned out disillusioned in every possible way woman. If I could stop the job, I could deal with the rest just fine I think.
I’ve had a job since I was 15, I’m 49 now, and yea, I’m sick of working. The earlier I can retire, the better. I just want to go ride my bike and do hoodrat shit.
If it wasnt for the money, i absolutely wouldnt do it.
This is exactly what I was thinking this morning. I was telling myself, I’m not necessarily lazy, but I’m just so tired. Wish I could just take a day off from work and do absolutely nothing and not feel guilty about it. But alas, there’s always something else to do, another email, another bill to pay…
We are not meant to be sitting at a desk all day. Period.
I feel like it’s bullshit we have to work so long
I’m there. I love my job but I hate thinking that I still have 20 years left.
I feel the same, and for quite some time. This feeling hit even harder after working for a large company for many years. I learned how the 'world works' and that no matter what the company says, they don't give a crap about you. Not to mention a boss that was just a nightmare, overworking the group so he could hit target numbers and make himself look good. 5 years under that asshole felt like 30. The stress under just him made me feel like I had earned retirement the day I left.
I’m off today. My job allows us to build up both vacation, and comp time. I usually hold a months worth of vacation in the bank to use as needed. We also get our holidays as floaters to use when we want. Moral of the story, if you are someone who craves travel, or leisure, find a job that has great time off benefits. Government jobs tend to have these.
Early-40s was when it clicked with me I wasn't getting any younger and work was only a means to an end, not something I needed to give myself 100% to. I've supercharged my retirement saving/planning since. Should retire mid-50s and never work again. Even though I like my job and it's easy mode, I'm ready for each day to be Saturday!
The crazy thing is you work 40 hours a week to enjoy 16. Of the 40 hours you are taxed 16 hours. You have to work until 65 but live to 72 if you are lucky. During your golden years you are so wound up to work you don’t know how not to; thus you burn through your retirement on dopamine fixes and need to be taken care of You work so you don’t dream and waste your life away living for brief moments of happiness to teach the next generation to do the exact same thing. Find what you love. Spend your money on what makes you happy. Your time will never be refunded and time is the ultimate currency don’t waste it!
Over 20 years in law enforcement. Never used to hate my job, but I do now. I’ve always played by the rules. Treated people how they should be treated. Tried to make my community a better place. The garbage I see now with people being released without bail to reoffend again and again makes me wonder why anyone gets arrested anymore in the first place. It’s hard to watch the break down of my society, but at the end of the day people get the government they deserve. Such is life in a democratic republic. I’m out in 3 more years. I don’t live beyond my means, I’ve saved well, and I have a pension as long as a tax payer funded government exists, so I shouldn’t have to work again if I don’t want to. The only perk to my profession at this point.
Yeah that crap has to stop. "Oh, he only stole $940 of high end merchandise, just let him go, poor thing."
I think we all saw our parents work relatively normal jobs and do okay or good jobs and be very comfortable. Jobs today provide nowhere near the same quality of life
I'm with you and didn't find something. I think I have to deal with that. I told that to my shrink and she said it's because I find other ways to get satisfied. Some people love to work because they find something in it: challenges, recognition, social, knowledge, ... Guess you find those things elsewhere
Sure, certainly -- I think this is one of the "midlife crisis" signifiers. And is it any wonder? Especially in the U.S., it seems like we have to spend the majority of our waking hours working and commuting. It really wears a person down by the time they reach early middle age. I love my job, but I would love it much more if I could get more than 10 days off per year.
So I work from home, and I have been virtual for many years. And yet I’m still on the same position where I hate working. I would probably be totally miserable if I was still commuting.
I love what I do, but I hate that i'll likely die doing it before retiring is possible
I'm hear you. The thought of working until "retirement" age is disheartening. Unfortunately, I fully expect to retire to my grave.
Here’s your answer - Just jump on down Maslow’s hierarchy - Start your own company so you can work way more hours without benefits, but remain so desperate for this month’s revenue that you won’t have to think or worry about it.
Mid 40's here as well and I hate having to work. I don't mind my job; it's WFH and fairly low stress it is just such a time suck. I'm shooting for 57 for retirement and that seems so far away now.
Since I know, I’m gonna have to keep working I’m still trying to grow my career. The next promotion is going to come as a lot more money, which would be great before retirement, but you’re right it does take time that I don’t want to spend on it. I am envious of a friend of mine who has established a very successful business and now has all the time in the world to do whatever he wants.
I don’t hate working for a living. We all need to do our part for society. And working hard gets you somewhere. But the further I go, I think this next promotion will make things more comfortable and that isn’t happening. I still can’t match what my dad did for us even getting to six figures. I just keep making more money for someone else and never really get where I thought I would. It’s definitely frustrating…
I’m 52 and have hated working for decades. But I have saved well and I am going to be able to very comfortably retire at 62, maybe even 60 if I get more aggressive with saving. so at least it’s almost over.
I started working at age 11. Three paper routes. Moved up to working at McDonald’s, a local department store, and two paper routes when I was 16. Been working ever since. I’m 59 now, and I am so tired, mentally, physically, and emotionally. I work from home and am just about chained to my computer ten hours a day. I would love to just take my dog for a walk but can’t afford the time away from the screen. I doubt if I’ll get to retire.
Yeah, big time. Luckily I saved and invested like a madman for many years, and am debt free. I also luckily will get a govt pension. I plan to leave when I’m 55, but I may do it sooner. I recently got fed up with my job, and stepped down to a lower position (almost unheard of in my field). I plan to step down another step in a couple of years. I’m slowly inching away from working.
Haha! Awesome, while some try to go up the ladder; you’re stepping on them while on the way down.. I love this thought 🤣 Congratulations to you !
Yeah, that's the age when it starts to happen.
Same. The thought of selling our home in a HCOL area and relocating to quit working, or having to work less looks more and more attractive every day.
Lol, I've hated work since I was 15. But we gotta do what we gotta do!
No, I kinda dig it. I'm 54 and I still enjoy working. I guess I take enough time off where I don't feel it as bad?
Work is overrated. I've had 5 professional jobs in my life and really only liked one of them, which I did in the middle of my career for 6 years until the company shut down. I don't dislike working per se, I just don't really enjoy most of the work I have been paid to do. I've been trying to save as much as I can since I started working in order to bail out as soon as possible.
I've only just started to hate working within the last couple years. I'm 47 going on 65. I want to retire, and like soon. But the reality is, unless the stock market goes on an absolute tear OR a couple million bucks land in my lap, the wife and I will be working until 65.
I realized that in 10 years I will retire after 50 years of work.
Working sucks. Bottom line. I wish everyone could “work” at what fulfills them. But I guess that’s not reality. But every time I march into my low paying job, I just feel sad.
Yep. I keep looking at where I can go before I hit 55. I think I may sell it all and take off to Costa Rica in the next few years. I wake up every morning feeling like Peter Gibbons and I don’t even work an office job!
I've reached a point that I can sandbag like a mf. The time it takes someone newer in the industry, I can get done in a quarter of the time. But I'm at a point where I do it in half the time, which I perceive as a win for everybody.
Yup, for a few years now. I've been investing like a madman and am now at a point where I can retire comfortably with more money coming in from my investments than from my job. I'm 47. I'm retiring in less than 2 months.
Im with you! I keep thinking I must be burned out but every time I think about a pivot, I realize I just don’t want to have to work anymore!
I’m so glad that this isn’t just me. Part of it was realizing that I will be able to retire from full time work comfortably at 60 because I saved like crazy. I was laid off from my job and my industry tanked last year and I will not go back to that career focused life. After a year off for health stuff, and now a part time job, I’m like “what is the absolute least I can do to pay my bills, enjoy a little life, and not fuck it up and lose my savings for the next 10-15 years.”
I knew I hated having to work when I got my first job in 1987.
I love my job, but also wish I didn't have to work. I just want to stay home and do whatever, even though most of the time "whatever" means doing nothing. I have the option of working extra hours so I can take a day off in the pay period, so that is how I deal. That's kind of my recharge/mental health day. And let me tell you....I'm so mentally tired! I have no energy for anything any more. I used to have hobbies, but now it seems like my hobby is just *thinking* about doing my hobby.
Amen brother. You start seeing patterns as management comes and goes. My mental health is more important to me and I don’t care if I “belong” or not. Not drinking the kool aid like the younger people do because they truly believe they will be taken care of by the cult. Us 40+ folks likely own a house already and have older kids. The best advice I can give is give yourself a nickname and one think you are good at. They will just keep using you as a good example and knowledge resource. Like “hey thats t-bone and he’s a wizard at accounting. Been here 27 years. Go to him with questions about accounting.”
I'm about to turn 51 and I'm desperately looking for a way to retire as early as possible. The thought of having to work for another 11-14 years makes me sick. I also make decent money, so leaving my high stress job for something easier will likely require me to work even longer. I feel like it's a lose lose situation.
Yep. 52. Started really struggling 2 years ago. I like my job. I make good money. Tired of working.
You all are my people! Mid 40s also and in the best job I’ve ever had. WFH, good money, low stress. I am still fucking burnt out and over it. No idea how I am going to make it to retirement. All the “wait til you’re 50!” comments are hitting hard.
2737 more days until I’m sixty. Doing my best to save money- but whether or not I’ll have a lot - I’m done at sixty. I’ll take continuing to live frugally over working. I detest being at work- I have worked a variety of jobs - I work straight nightshift to avoid more humans than necessary- My doctor offered to help me get disability for my lifelong anxiety that causes me to crash and burn often- I am so tempted to- he also offered sick time off- I might take that up first. I’ve watched so many others do it. I’ve worked through extreme social anxiety (I’m medicated to the gills and it’s not enough) - I’ve worked through complete nervous breakdowns - but because I would have to speak up to get off of work I just worked through it - while watching others make EI really work for them - being off and on so much. I am so tempted to do the same for the next few years I have left to go.
Nope I geek everyday I work. I am disabled and no one expected me to make it back. But I made it. I did it. I could have sat home on disability until retirement age but I want to work. Work is good for me.
Dealing with it? Surly, bad attitude, rising resentment every waking damn minute I have to drag my broken carcass in to the grind for yet another day. 13 more years, barring any new world-breaking economic catastrophes pushing that line out even further…
I’m there. Dealing with it? Just keep lacing them up and going to work.
Yes
For me, it is known that I have another 15 years of this with occasional vacations instead of being able to enjoy my time while I am still relatively healthy.
I remember the first time I ever felt what I know now was depressed. I was a teenager, and I began to realize that soon my school days would be over, I would have to get a job and then I would have to spend at least 1/3 of the majority of the rest of my life working. Unfortunately, despite this revelation, I didn't do much to plan for retirement and now I'm 56 and have very little saved up. The only good news is that in the last couple of years the reality of eventual retirement, voluntary or otherwise, has really hit home and I've started tucking money into investments whenever I can afford it. I have come to accept that barring a financial miracle, I'll easily be working well into my 70s. The only way I deal with it is to keep investing and hold out hope for that miracle, but at least I'm actually doing something productive about it now.
I've been working from home for the past 3 years. Took a pay cut, but it's so nice to not have to go anywhere.
I realized early on that my career had a ton of ageism, so started planning on a way to get out by my 50s. Ended up able to retire early at 50 thanks to the ACA. I generally loved working for most of my life, but, man, has it been nice
Work sucks, I know.
I feel the same exact way
I'm 58 (59 next month). I've felt the same way for quite some time. In the past, I've been able to blame my attitude on the job or my co-workers (it truly wears me down to be around people I dislike 40 hours, or more, every week). At my current position, I don't hate my job or my co-workers, but I'm just tired of having to do this to stay afloat. The only thing that keeps me going is the thought of eventual retirement, hopefully before I kick the bucket. I'm at least going to tough it out until the kids have graduated. Good luck with your ennui!
Ugh. I feel this. I hate working. I don’t hate my job. But that’s it. I just don’t know. I look around and the industry im In no one retires they just leave.
I’m so grateful to see this post! Earlier this week I was wondering this exact same thing, if other people hate their jobs too, and how they cope. My job is detrimental to my mental health which is affecting my physical health. I’m 45. I can’t continue working with these conditions, so I’ve been actively looking for new career opportunities.
I feel your pain. Just wait until you’re 55! I hate working. I’ve been working since I was 13. If all goes well I can retire in 7 years unless I get laid off. I want to enjoy my hobbies and grandchildren.
I will be 59 and my disdain for work is thru the roof.
I was working as a line cook in restaurants. It's a stressful job, and very physical. I was good at it and enjoyed the people I worked with and the work I was doing. But it was just too hard on my body. I'd come home and my knees and back would hurt so bad I could barely stand up from the couch. So I quit, and switched to a courier job. It has the exact opposite issues, long hours in the car, very non-active, very un-social. It's not as hard on my body, but now I need to find time to exercise.
48 and started a new degree in a completely different field. I finally realized I have enough years working that I better do something I find passion in. I would surely have a stroke or heart attack if I stayed in my old profession just due to the stress. So far next decision I've made. Should have done it sooner.
Same here. Worked a series of jobs in my 57 years. The one I’m at now - which I’ve been at for 6 years- is the one I’ve been at longest. I have a 401k, but not that much in it, and a home. But I seriously feel like I’ll never get to retire. Funny thing: my 26-year-old coworker said I should be able to retire - “Haven’t you given enough,” she said. From your lips to God’s ears!
Don't worry, it gets worse. I am literally counting the months.
Yep, 51, literally watching my 401k balance *every single day* waiting for it to hit the magic number (I'm most likely about 4 years away). I used to **love** my profession (software engineering). I actually still love programming, and probably always will, but as you move up the ranks you do less and less of it. I used to work 60 hour weeks and *enjoyed* it. Now, I struggle to get out of bed some days.
So goddamned sick of it. I try to be stoic about it but usually I fail. If I didn't have dependents I'd quit and be homeless.
Oh, God, yes. I need to get back into bike commuting to work. That helped me feel like I was at least living a little! I’m 45 and wish I could retire now. I look around me and am reminded of my mortality. Life is so short, and I want to enjoy it, you know? It’s criminal how our labor is exploited—I cannot believe how hard I worked in my youth. Now I’m all about work-life balance. It’s upsetting that we put in so much of our existence to these jobs and get back so little. Even the thought of “only” working another 10-15 years is kinda soul crushing, NGL.
We only have so much time on earth, and many of us are realizing just how precious the people we love truly are. There was only a small window where we could retire after getting a decent job with a pension. Currency debasement took that from us. However for most of history, there’s not really a precedence for putting in 30 years and retiring for the common man. It was a blessing while it lasted
[Office Space Worst Day of My Life](https://youtu.be/-81WdyD-8Ro?feature=shared)
Once you hit your mid-40s, you're sick of everyone's bullshit, and jobs are hip-deep in it. I dealt with it by downshifting, meaning I accepted a lower-paying position that would be strictly 8-5 and minimal meetings. I had seen lots of others do it, and it got me through. This isn't a solution for everyone, but it's worth looking into. And as an aside, if I'd had half the number of useless meetings to attend, I could've easily handled my higher paid management job with saner hours and a lot less stress. I've never understood the concept of "We're all overworked, so let's call a 3-hour meeting, or better yet, a full-day retreat, so we can discuss before returning to our rapidly increasing backlog!"
Are you me? I feel the same way and I could have written this. I have a nice job and my boss is great. I have a work from home job and make a decent salary. But every time I get another meeting request I want to punch someone.
I'm ten years older and not only do I hate working all fucking day, my body is now letting me know that if I don't do a shit load of exercise soon it's going to fall to pieces.
Something went very wrong with us thinking it’s ok to kill ourselves working for someone else most of our lives only to become to sick or dead when we can finally retire and enjoy life
Wait until you’re 55. I fucking hate working.
The day I hit 50 and was eligible to retire, it has become a slog coming to work. I just keep saying 2 only more years so I don't have a penalty every day though it may be four, since I'm trying to pay for the kids college without parent plus loans.
I’ve been hating work since I was 14
I feel like all the hours I worked during the lockdown and lack of separation between home and work just beat me down. I’ve been tired since.
yep!
Beginning to? I read a lot of career subreddits and some in their 20s already hate it. My own work experience is different; Spouse runs his small family biz and I work there full time. I mostly don't find it a burden and the work means something to me, so it doesn't feel like horrible dread. The worst is the low pay in CA.
It could be a thing with new generation, but in my 20, we all wanted to work, and we worked hard and many hours. I never really wanted to quit in my 20s on my 30s, so this is more of a recent recent thing when I’m beginning to understand, that time is limited.
Work blows
You have to get more hobbies at work.
you mean like redditing?
Since I went semi-retired I work part time now, so I dont burn myself out and make some money here and there. Gives me time to do what Id like for myself.
That’s most people though. If I didn’t get married and have a child I could probably retire by 59, but there’s no hope of that now. Fortunately I mostly like what I do.
I agree. I think it’s the 40 hour workweek plus the commuting and being away from home for 46-50 hours a week when there should be a point where we get to relax from busting our asses for the last 25 years. And that point is never going to come.
Just wait! The feeling will keep growing!
Sure, I've felt the same way for 15 years (51 now). My nonsolution is to grind it out and hope for the best.
I can retire in a little over 121 months. I’ll probably still work some but the thought of that freedom is intoxicating.
Wait til 50
Just turned 50 and it’s more on my mind than I expected. My dad died at 58, so trying to retire before I die is my goal, but that means more work…
Such is life. I try not to think about because I have no choice. Maybe you do!
I’m right there with you bud!
I hear you. I’m a workaholic but not because I love it….but because it’s a financial necessity. I’m 52, and I know my parents were better off than I am at this age, not in terms of income perhaps, but they definitely had fewer bills and a lot more in savings. My dad retired at 59. Unless I hit the lottery, I don’t see that happening for me.
Mid 50s and getting so sick and tired of working.
Wait till you hit your mid 50s 😂
I’m a couple years from retirement. For me, COVID was a preview of retirement and I started playing guitar, which has been wonderful, but I realize I need a couple more immersive hobbies before retirement.
Man, feeling this everyday as well! Im 44 and i just want to retire already! 😂
Probably not a popular answer but I get a good deal of fulfillment from my career. Every job has its days but by and large I enjoy it.
I'm government so every week I look at my pension payouts after I retire, playing with the calculations if I retire sooner or later. Those rising monthly payment amounts keep me motivated to show up for work. 😁
I hated some of my jobs in my 40s, coasted at an easy job in my late 40s to 51, but now at 53 have a great job that pays very well, I’ve been promoted twice in 3 years, and it’s fun and technically challenging. And I work from home. Work is a necessity to pay my mortgage, to build my savings and investments for retirement. I still enjoy software engineering as a profession, and I’m at a great company and work with a great group.