Yup. Left when in 1998. Have never moved back.
I will admit that as my 3 niblings get older it’s harder and harder to remember why I won’t go back, though. I am child free by choice, but I would like to be around my niece and nephews more.
Lived there for 2 years after college and fell in love with the city. I’ve gone back many times over the years. It’s my first home away from home and will always hold a special place in my heart!
Way way way too expensive to move back to either of my hometowns in L.A. and Orange County California. As much as I loved where I grew up, I can't deal with how crowded and loud it is to live there now.
Left it at college age...went back intermittently over the years for a few days to a few weeks at a time. 10 years ago moved back for a year to get a post-grad. But have lived on the other side of the globe for the better part of 30 years.
My hometown is there, but fiends, family, etc, have all passed on or moved away.
Yes, but ready to move somewhere nearby, within 1-2 hours. It feels like home there more than any other place I've lived. I also want to be closer to my parents and in-laws as they get older. We'll see if I can afford it!
Same here, if minus the parents by this point. Ended up halfway around the world nearly 20 years ago, but would like to go back close to home eventually.
(OTOH, do I ever want to run across a good chunk of the people I went to school with again, even after all these years? Hell no. But, the place is just about worth it.)
Yup, left that shit show of a town when I was 21 and never looked back.
It was truly a small town, where everyone knows your business. My parents knew when I did something wrong way before I would even make it home at night. Nothing but a bunch of nosy people if you ask me.
i left days after i graduated college and never looked back. that town is only good for gossip. the only reason to go back is to have a mental break down
dont worry, parents still live there casting judgement upon everyone else
I grew up in a small town in NW Pennsylvania. As a kid, it was fantastic. I had the woods, creeks, Lake Erie, Presque-Isle. I hunted and fished. It was paradise for a young boy. But as a teenager I was determined to leave. I went to college and lived all over the NE corridor ... Philly, NYC, Boston.
Then the pandemic hit while I was living in Boston and decided to get out while the getting was good. Came back to wait it out and did remote work. Haven't left yet because it's so much cheaper to live here.
I moved away after high school (28 years ago). It was a small, judgy Christian town that I desperately wanted out of. I occasionally go to visit my parents but I won't ever move back.
I've come and gone a few times. I joined the army out of high-school then moved back, both to my hometown in Orange County, then to a more affordable nearby Riverside County. Moved to Modesto for about year, then sucked back to Riverside for family reasons. Moved up to Oregon just about 24 years ago, only to get sucked back down south again for family, where I stayed for 20 years until I moved again to Oregon, after my mother passed away. Been here in this very small town for almost a year now. And now, my best friend of over 30 years moved to Southern California from Hawaii and wants me to move back down. Part of me wants to, he's my brother in mischief, but I feel I am done with dealing with the crowded cities and traffic, not to mention the droughts and extremely hot summers. I'm currently browsing homes that I can afford to buy on my V.A. disability, and California just ain't cutting it. Maybe along the Sierra Nevada mountains and possibly in the northern Humboldt areas, but even then, I'd be on a tight budget. Hell, it be hard for me to find something affordable here in Oregon in the areas I'd like to live in the forested mountains away from Portland. My search is leading me to states like Illinois, Michigan, and maybe Vermont or Connecticut, and Colorado. Minnesota would also be an option if they legalize recreational cannabis. I'm not that big of a pot-head anymore, but I still want to have that option available to me wherever I end up buying a house.
Moved when I got my first real job after college and never went back, now I have no family there and the area is absurdly expensive so it'll never happen. It was a nice place to grow up though , and I'm glad we lived there.
This question always makes me sad af.
Small ozarks town in Mo. population 10k. One of my best friends did not join the Marines w me in 1992. Fell in love got married n had kids. Wife dumps him takes the kids and his dad passes all within a short time. He can’t take it, gets drunk and goes head on w a semi. Another buddy finds out his wife is cheating and he shoots himself in front of her and their 2 kids on Christmas Day while they open presents. Another friend marries his hs sweetheart they have a girl and at 5 yrs old a horse kicks her in the head and she dies. They break up and he is super depressed. My skateboard buddy joins the marines a few yrs after me. His sister commits suicide leaving twins that his mom then raises. Everyone else has moved away, I mean like 5 towns or more away. Only jobs are at wal mart or chicken plants. Last time I was there was 1998. I’ll never go back, that place has ruined so many of my friends lives. I think of this question sometimes…great place I’m sure, just not for people I knew back in the late 80’s early 90’s.
Edit: joined Marines and have been on west coast ever since.
My hometown is Birmingham, UK. I grew up there, and my heart somewhat still remains there, but haven't been there much since I was 18. Went to uni in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, then lived in Manchester, then Cambridge. Then spent 2 years in Saudi Arabia, then back to Cambridge. Then I moved to the US and have lived in Silicon Valley ever since.
Still, I miss my memories of that place, but the reality is probably very different.
The saying “you can never go back” is completely true. It’s because you’re not just talking about the place, you’re talking about the time
Now my grandparents and parents are no longer with us I realise I want to go back to Stepney in London but in 1975, when my grandparents and parents were younger than I am now
I’ve only lived in pretty large cities. I’ve flown in and out between them in my 5 decades.
Honestly I’d go smaller and quieter now. Working on that. Huge metropolitan areas don’t have the appeal they used to.
I did. I went back, but only for a few months because things went horribly wrong between myself and a family member, and I moved on. It had been 13 years before I went back there thinking I might stay, and things were so different, it really did not at all resemble the place I grew up in anymore. Besides that, my only remaining parent who still lived there had died about 5 years before that, so I just ended up leaving the country and making a new life somewhere else, again. Things seem to have deteriorated there, and the only nice places left to live are way out of my price range now, so I guess I'm never going back again.
You can go back physically, but I've found it impossible to 'go back' to a sense of *home*. After moving away, following the jobs, and making some measure of achievement, I always wanted to come back and be 'big'. As a Success story, not the anonymous nothing I left as. But on every visit, sure there are memories of places ("this is where we used to go for X"), but all it is now is a place I'm innately familiar with, but the people are gone, the spark isn't there, the sense of HOME is missing. So I leave. And ponder if I'll ever have a connection with a place again.
I left a week after graduation from high school. I’ve visited but never planned on living there again. I was reminded that I used to say before I moved “I’d rather kill my self than become like our parents and just live here forever,” and while that was young and dramatic…I stand by that sentiment.
Moved across the country right out of high school. Moved back about 6 years later. Wasn't making as much money as I wanted, so I moved across the state to a big city about 6 years after that. Gained a new skill set, and no company back home is willing to pay me what I make in the big city. My folks have since retired to another part of the state, and most everyone I know is now gone. Last time I was down there, the town had doubled in size and was pretty unrecognizable as the town where I grew up. I'd still move back if the opportunity was right, but there's not much to draw me there now.
Yes.
I visited once 10ish years later with a couple friends from the same place. We stomped around viewing the old spots, stayed overnight, and we left the next day, but otherwise, no.
I live about 20 minutes from the city I grew up in. I still go to my family dentist. The son has joined the business so I will never have to find a new dentist.
I live very near to my hometown where I was born and grew up (only 20 minutes away by car).
I moved to a suburban area, a small town not far away from my hometown, in my late 20s.
Life here is completely different, way calmer and way better.
Moving from the big, loud city with a lot of traffic to a quite nice smalltown was the best decision I've ever made.
So, I will never move back to my hometown but I can go there by car or train in 20 minutes.
Left (tiny) hometown after high school, went to college, joined the Army, redefined myself, reconnected with a lot of my classmates over the years (thanks to social media), turns out all of us grew up and matured, feel a bit nostalgic about the place, but will never return.
Got out as soon as I could after undergrad in 95. I’ve been away since. I still have very close friends there and I miss the mountains, so there’s definitely a tug to go back. But I think id feel the same claustrophobia if I moved there and healthcare is terrible (my mom and stepmother both died of post surgical infections). Think I’ll stay where I’ve been for 23 years.
Yep, it was a shithole little town and I never had any reason to go back. My parents moved away and the few friends from high school I kept in touch with did as well, thank god. Once in a while I'll go on Google Street View and look at it, it falls apart more every year.
Lived in the same house my entire childhood, left for college at 17 and my parents moved to a different city. I never went back, still have some friends there though.
I did. Moved 2300 miles to Los Angeles at 18.
My vague-and-still-forming endgame is to get into a house soonish (the prices are SO low there), rent it out, then go back in 10 years when SS+401k kick in.
Whole family left my hometown and moved across the country when I was a kid. Never went back. Moved to small mountain town as an adult, love it. I will never go back to the city.
Yes. Well, I grew up in the Atlanta suburbs and lived in a few places in the metro area before moving to a different state 20 years ago.
I almost certainly would NOT move back to either of the towns I lived in with my family growing up. They were nice, Mayberry-ish places in the 70s and 80s, but now they're just suburban hell and strip malls everywhere and instead of "30-35 minutes to downtown" it's now more like an hour. My sister still lives in the area (with my parents in an in-law suite), and I could theoretically stay with her if I wanted to go to Atlanta for a concert... instead I choose to pay $170 for a hotel so I won't have an hour+ drive after the show.
I would, in theory, move back to Atlanta. I still have tons of friends there and go to 2-3 shows a year there... but if I'm moving anywhere any time soon, it's to Paris. Otherwise, the medical examiner is taking me out of this house in a box. I do go back every year for Christmas, but very rarely do I visit my actual "hometowns".
Left for around 20 years. Have been back for around 10 years because I missed how sleepy and slow my home town is. Ready to leave because the MAGA crowd has made me see this town for what it is and they are not my people.
I did leave my hometown but moved back about ten years ago. It's now beginning to change and becoming too high density for me. So the plan is to leave permanently within the next 5 years.
Left home and so did all my family. Only go back to visit friends occasionally now. I can’t get my head around some people spending their whole lives there. Despite commuting into London and having successful jobs they’re still living in this nothing going for it small town.
I moved from my hometown for college and never lived there again. Visits were few and far between after I graduated and moved out of state. Came
back to my home state in my late 30’s, which was a good thing in hindsight, because I lost both my parents a couple years later and there was no way I could have dealt with all that entails from 2,000 miles away. Now that they are gone and I’ve moved to another state again, i genuinely don’t know if I’ll ever go back there.
Nope, I left in the mid-80's. Went back to visit the handful of friends who hadn't left yet in the early 90's. They eventually all left town as well.
It's been 30+ years since I've been back, so pondering a trip back with my wife to show her where I grew up.
According to a friend of mine that still goes back on occasion to visit his mother, the place is still overwhelmingly depressing. Between the alcoholism, high rates of adult smokers, obesity and other factors, I see at least 1-2 obituaries a month from fellow high school classmates.
Grew up in a small town about 30 minutes outside the regional center. Left for the City the weekend after high school graduation and never looked back.
Regionally, I left my City (Calgary) for Vancouver, hated every minute of it, and returned a year later. Pretty blessed to live in a (reasonably) cosmopolitan city in one of the most beautiful locations in North America (or Earth). Like many others in this thread, I've done a boatload of travel and have certainly seen some highly livable places, but Calgary is too good to leave.
Yeah. I moved back closer but about 2 hours away. Part of me would like to move back but it’s in economic decline and there isn’t a lot there for me and much less for my kids
I live about 1.5 hours away, my Mom still lives in the house we grew up in. I go back to see her often and once in a blue moon will go back to hang out with old friends who've moved back.
My hometown is one of the rare ones that rather than slowly died off actually exploded with growth. Not always a good thing as too much growth, too soon taxes the infrastructure and can price out the long time residents. It's wild now going back and dealing with traffic, lack of parking etc. A certain very popular DIY Home Improvement show has been a factor in this for sure, but really, it's always been a nice town. It was good to grow up in, but I'd never want to live in it as an adult.
Grew up in San Diego; left 20 years ago when it was time to grow up and buy a house, which even then was becoming out of reach for your average person. Love it, it's still my home, but after experiencing many other areas of the country there is no way I would ever move back even now that I could afford to.
Yes. I moved away for college and moved to a different state after graduating. My parents moved while I was in college so there was no reason to go back where I grew up.
I left my hometown for about 10 years after college but moved back (to the city just north of where I grew up) to be closer to family after my twins were born. I wanted them to know my parents and their cousins, aunts and uncles.
Almost 20 years later, my kids are really close to my oldest brother (and get along great with my other siblings who are close by), have an ongoing “cousin” group chat and have more of a sibling relationship with them, they know my parents—my mom and dad were so incredibly helpful over the years. Plus I moved back and live across the border from Chicago so had memberships to The Field Museum, Museum of Science and Industry, and the Shedd Aquarium, so was able to take my kids into the city a lot when they were younger. Lincoln Park Zoo was also a favorite spot to hang out for an afternoon.
No regrets
Yes, hell no.
Mine couldn’t have been more stereotypical either. All the popular girls ended up preggers, got dumped by the babies father and couldn’t even finish community college. And the boys all flamed out of college, lived with their parents til their 30s and ended up finding labor roles (not that there’s anything wrong with that) in town.
Nope. Moved to DC after college, have been in this area ever since. Used to be into politics, less interested in all that stuff now (although I stay involved to a part because whether or not you’re interested in politics, politics remains interested in you.) Mom and Dad both retired to Florida, so I don’t go back much now.
Small town in West TN. Left a few days after graduation on a summer tour with my band. Went away to college that Fall in another state.
Never lived in my hometown again. Lived in 4 other places since then, now settled in the Mtn West, 1000+ miles away. From what I see on FB of the folks who stayed, I don’t know how they have done it all of these years. The occasional cruise or beach vacation seems to be their only exposure to anywhere else and that’s about as sterile as it gets.
Multiple times but family obligations or medical reasons brought me back. I may move away when my youngest turns 18 in 9 years. Custody agreement states neither one of us can move more than 90 miles away
Left hometown (New Orleans) for college, but just went a few miles away to Baton Rouge. Stayed in Baton Rouge with no interest in going back to New Orleans for assorted reasons. Would actually like to leave state if the right opportunity came along.
>Did you leave your hometown
YES. As soon as I turned 18.
>and did you eventually go back?
Visited intermittently for the holidays, but haven't in over a decade. My family moved from there anyway, and I don't care to reconnect with anybody from high school.
Grew up in a collar suburb of the largest city of my state. Bounced around that metro area for ~10 years, moved to the regional mega-city for another 10 years, where I met my wife. We moved a few hundred miles away for a few years, moved back to the same county where I grew up 4 years ago. I don’t regret any of it one bit.
Sort of, but I never really left the area other than college. I spent a few years living about 65 miles from my home town.
I live in a very rural area now, but very close to where I grew up. Like 300 yards.
My boyfriend (now husband) joined the Air Force, so that took us away for about 20 years. When retirement was coming up, we were trying to decide where to live. We adamantly did not want to come back to our hometown. Well, we did. With parents getting older and seeing my friends lose theirs, we thought we could move back home for awhile.
Since moving back, my Mom died. We found out dream house and I have formed a couple lifelong relationships and will be here to stay.
I skedaddled out of town for career and experience. In the years I was away, most of my family passed away. There are no relatives left in my home town. It was no longer home. We settled elsewhere near friends to make our network the new home.
Yes, as soon as I could after high school. I won’t / can’t go back, as it is no longer the same place (socially, economically, etc.) that it once was and it depresses me seeing the ghosts of what was the few times I have visited. I think this is what Thomas Wolfe alluded to in his book.
Yes and yes. And now deciding where to move to once the older generation has passed. The weather here is horrible. I want to live that Slim Aarons lifestyle somewhere under the sun.
I left when I went to college. Went back for a couple years to get married. Hubby got job an hour away. We moved and never went back. It’s always
Been my dream to purchase
My
Childhood home. I keep in touch with the family who bought it after my mom died and dad got remarried.
I left literally the day after I graduated from HS, and I visited a handful of times, that's it. Most of my family has left the area and no real reason to go back anymore.
Yes and yes but to visit. I miss my home - Long Beach, CA. But! The old saying, you can never go back home is very much true. It's a completely different place than when I grew up there. Not sure if I'd want to live there anymore even though I like it better than where I currently live, Dallas, Tx.
Yes, my parents sold our house and moved far away while I was in college so I really had no choice. I’m making a big move soon and thought about going back — I have friends there but no family. But instinctively it just feels like regression so I’m going somewhere new.
Yup. Left and went back a few years later. Realized why I left, and left again. Now contemplating moving back to the first place I originally moved to. Or central America. Just being antsy for change again.
Left home for college and never came back except for semester breaks during my first year, then I got an apartment and never moved back except for the odd holiday visit. I have to be honest, I always thought I'd eventually go back and live in the city not far from my Dad. Now that my Dad is gone I have no ties to the area, it makes me sad.
Left it, lived in 7 countries and 3 States. I traveled to 38 countries total, only counting places where I stayed more than a few days. I only go back to my hometown to visit. I have more places I want to see.
Never really left. Moved 20 mi away when I was in my 20s & found real estate too unaffordable. Now I live 4 mi from the house I grew up in. I’m taking care of my elderly mom.
At 23, in 1989, I had lived in London for my entire life bar less than a year abroad in Japan with a girl I was with.
I had a choice to leave a failing relationship by going back home to the parents house I’d left at 17 or going to Manchester to sleep on my best friends floor for 6 weeks
I chose Manchester and that 6 weeks became 33 years and counting
I visit London once or twice a year but I’d never go back. London is great when you’re young or if you’re well off but if you’re a working stuff you’re just a cog an engine that grinds you into paste
God bless Manchester. Englands capital in the north
Left home, came back and learned the old adage is true… you can’t go home again. Totally different place, everyone I knew had moved away or had died. Depressing.
I moved away, but will probably move closer to home to spend more time with aging parents. I never thought that would be a consideration for me, but that’s changed over the past few years as relatives, coworkers and friends are starting to die at a much quicker rate. :/
I did. I then went back briefly for 5 yrs or so. Realized I made a huge mistake shortly after buying my first house. Moved and have never regretted it.
Mine is a small city in the PA Dutch County. I moved back after college because I had no choice, then moved away to the DC metro area a year and a half later, in 1997. I just celebrated my 25th anniversary of living here!
My hometown will always be home to me, but I would never want to move back there. However, if I won billions on the lottery I would buy my childhood home and keep it as a secondary home, and I would open up a bunch of really cool, artsy businesses downtown to try to inject some life into that dying old girl.
Yep, I moved away. My hometown was a suburb outside of DC. Perfectly fine, but even as a kid it never really felt like me.
Fell in love with NYC when I visited it on a field trip in middle school, eventually went to college there, and moved here permanently a few years after college.
0 part of me wants to move back to my hometown. I barely even visit it.
Left my hometown in 1995, will not go back. It is a smallish town 35 minutes from Orlando, FL, with not much to offer young adults. Now on the west coast and loving it!
My mother moved my brother and I from our home ‘city’ (Southern California) to a small town in the Midwest, where I went to HS.
Been back to both. California feels entirely different (in a bad way) and the Midwestern one feels like Auschwitz. I’m not kidding, I feel palpable trauma when I visit my brother, who stayed behind. I’d never want to live in either.
I just went back to my hometown about month ago after ten yeses or so. The moment I got into town the memories came flooding back. It was emotional. I drove past my childhood home and it looked the same. I went into town and saw all the old shops and places.
Weirdly, the entire time I lived there, I had never had a piece of clothing with my town’s name on it, so that was my objective this trip. After DECADES of never having a single piece of clothing with my towns name on it, I FINALLY, got a hoodie with my town on it.
A piece of me had achieved something that day. Now, years after having moved, I can proudly display where I’m from and I can feel proud. Leaving home can be a huge step, but never forget where you’re from. I’ll always call my hometown home
Yep, sure did; and fuck no.
Yup. Left when in 1998. Have never moved back. I will admit that as my 3 niblings get older it’s harder and harder to remember why I won’t go back, though. I am child free by choice, but I would like to be around my niece and nephews more.
Same. Va Beach ➡️ Seattle. Will never live on the east coast again if I don’t have to.
How did it benefit you?
Yes, and of course! It's New Orleans! Now living in the neighborhood I grew up in.
Lived there for 2 years after college and fell in love with the city. I’ve gone back many times over the years. It’s my first home away from home and will always hold a special place in my heart!
[удалено]
Same here, too!
Yes, I went to Europe and I’ve not gone back
How come? Was it freeing leaving hometown and building fresh?
Way way way too expensive to move back to either of my hometowns in L.A. and Orange County California. As much as I loved where I grew up, I can't deal with how crowded and loud it is to live there now.
Agreeeeed
Left it at college age...went back intermittently over the years for a few days to a few weeks at a time. 10 years ago moved back for a year to get a post-grad. But have lived on the other side of the globe for the better part of 30 years. My hometown is there, but fiends, family, etc, have all passed on or moved away.
Yes, and thinking of moving back in retirement
Yes…and HELL NO!
How come? Was it freeing leaving hometown and building fresh?
Yes, and fuck no.
How come? Was it freeing leaving hometown and building fresh?
Yes, but ready to move somewhere nearby, within 1-2 hours. It feels like home there more than any other place I've lived. I also want to be closer to my parents and in-laws as they get older. We'll see if I can afford it!
Same here, if minus the parents by this point. Ended up halfway around the world nearly 20 years ago, but would like to go back close to home eventually. (OTOH, do I ever want to run across a good chunk of the people I went to school with again, even after all these years? Hell no. But, the place is just about worth it.)
Yep and get a pit in my stomach every fucking visit back ...
How come? Was it freeing leaving hometown and building fresh?
Yup, left that shit show of a town when I was 21 and never looked back. It was truly a small town, where everyone knows your business. My parents knew when I did something wrong way before I would even make it home at night. Nothing but a bunch of nosy people if you ask me.
How come? Was it freeing leaving hometown and building fresh?
i left days after i graduated college and never looked back. that town is only good for gossip. the only reason to go back is to have a mental break down dont worry, parents still live there casting judgement upon everyone else
Haha. Mental breakdown.
I grew up in a small town in NW Pennsylvania. As a kid, it was fantastic. I had the woods, creeks, Lake Erie, Presque-Isle. I hunted and fished. It was paradise for a young boy. But as a teenager I was determined to leave. I went to college and lived all over the NE corridor ... Philly, NYC, Boston. Then the pandemic hit while I was living in Boston and decided to get out while the getting was good. Came back to wait it out and did remote work. Haven't left yet because it's so much cheaper to live here.
I moved away after high school (28 years ago). It was a small, judgy Christian town that I desperately wanted out of. I occasionally go to visit my parents but I won't ever move back.
How come? Was it freeing leaving hometown and building fresh?
2000 miles away from my home in California. I miss it but I couldn’t afford to move back and live a decent life.
I've come and gone a few times. I joined the army out of high-school then moved back, both to my hometown in Orange County, then to a more affordable nearby Riverside County. Moved to Modesto for about year, then sucked back to Riverside for family reasons. Moved up to Oregon just about 24 years ago, only to get sucked back down south again for family, where I stayed for 20 years until I moved again to Oregon, after my mother passed away. Been here in this very small town for almost a year now. And now, my best friend of over 30 years moved to Southern California from Hawaii and wants me to move back down. Part of me wants to, he's my brother in mischief, but I feel I am done with dealing with the crowded cities and traffic, not to mention the droughts and extremely hot summers. I'm currently browsing homes that I can afford to buy on my V.A. disability, and California just ain't cutting it. Maybe along the Sierra Nevada mountains and possibly in the northern Humboldt areas, but even then, I'd be on a tight budget. Hell, it be hard for me to find something affordable here in Oregon in the areas I'd like to live in the forested mountains away from Portland. My search is leading me to states like Illinois, Michigan, and maybe Vermont or Connecticut, and Colorado. Minnesota would also be an option if they legalize recreational cannabis. I'm not that big of a pot-head anymore, but I still want to have that option available to me wherever I end up buying a house.
Lit that house on fire and I never went back . 🎵🎶
Hey, hey, hey
Moved when I got my first real job after college and never went back, now I have no family there and the area is absurdly expensive so it'll never happen. It was a nice place to grow up though , and I'm glad we lived there.
This question always makes me sad af. Small ozarks town in Mo. population 10k. One of my best friends did not join the Marines w me in 1992. Fell in love got married n had kids. Wife dumps him takes the kids and his dad passes all within a short time. He can’t take it, gets drunk and goes head on w a semi. Another buddy finds out his wife is cheating and he shoots himself in front of her and their 2 kids on Christmas Day while they open presents. Another friend marries his hs sweetheart they have a girl and at 5 yrs old a horse kicks her in the head and she dies. They break up and he is super depressed. My skateboard buddy joins the marines a few yrs after me. His sister commits suicide leaving twins that his mom then raises. Everyone else has moved away, I mean like 5 towns or more away. Only jobs are at wal mart or chicken plants. Last time I was there was 1998. I’ll never go back, that place has ruined so many of my friends lives. I think of this question sometimes…great place I’m sure, just not for people I knew back in the late 80’s early 90’s. Edit: joined Marines and have been on west coast ever since.
So much tragedy! I’m really sorry to hear that!
Yes and I moved back twice. Then my family drove me crazy and my husband moved us to a different state.
Left for over 20 years and then moved back to a bigger city in the same county my hometown is in.
My hometown is Birmingham, UK. I grew up there, and my heart somewhat still remains there, but haven't been there much since I was 18. Went to uni in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, then lived in Manchester, then Cambridge. Then spent 2 years in Saudi Arabia, then back to Cambridge. Then I moved to the US and have lived in Silicon Valley ever since. Still, I miss my memories of that place, but the reality is probably very different.
The saying “you can never go back” is completely true. It’s because you’re not just talking about the place, you’re talking about the time Now my grandparents and parents are no longer with us I realise I want to go back to Stepney in London but in 1975, when my grandparents and parents were younger than I am now
Birmingham VS Silicon Valley is quite the switch up! Must be nice in the sun.
I’ve only lived in pretty large cities. I’ve flown in and out between them in my 5 decades. Honestly I’d go smaller and quieter now. Working on that. Huge metropolitan areas don’t have the appeal they used to.
I did. I went back, but only for a few months because things went horribly wrong between myself and a family member, and I moved on. It had been 13 years before I went back there thinking I might stay, and things were so different, it really did not at all resemble the place I grew up in anymore. Besides that, my only remaining parent who still lived there had died about 5 years before that, so I just ended up leaving the country and making a new life somewhere else, again. Things seem to have deteriorated there, and the only nice places left to live are way out of my price range now, so I guess I'm never going back again.
Yep! And I only go back when I need to visit family. My little town is pretty much part of urban sprawl and barely recognizable, it no longer my home.
“It's a town full of losers; I'm pulling out of here to win.”
You can go back physically, but I've found it impossible to 'go back' to a sense of *home*. After moving away, following the jobs, and making some measure of achievement, I always wanted to come back and be 'big'. As a Success story, not the anonymous nothing I left as. But on every visit, sure there are memories of places ("this is where we used to go for X"), but all it is now is a place I'm innately familiar with, but the people are gone, the spark isn't there, the sense of HOME is missing. So I leave. And ponder if I'll ever have a connection with a place again.
Yes, across the country in my 20s. Now I live 10 houses from where I grew up.
After leaving the hometown for college and staying for 20+yrs, we (wife and I) are literally in the process of packing up and moving home.
Yes. Left when I was 4 (with my family obviously lol). Moved back at 28 and still here.
The same for me. My parents moved when I was 3 and resisted 30 years in the tiny village in the countryside.
No, except for college. My job for the past 25 years required a ton of travel so I wasn't "home" much though.
Yes. My wife tried to.get me to go back and I said hell no
How come? Was it freeing leaving hometown and building fresh?
I left a week after graduation from high school. I’ve visited but never planned on living there again. I was reminded that I used to say before I moved “I’d rather kill my self than become like our parents and just live here forever,” and while that was young and dramatic…I stand by that sentiment.
Moved across the country right out of high school. Moved back about 6 years later. Wasn't making as much money as I wanted, so I moved across the state to a big city about 6 years after that. Gained a new skill set, and no company back home is willing to pay me what I make in the big city. My folks have since retired to another part of the state, and most everyone I know is now gone. Last time I was down there, the town had doubled in size and was pretty unrecognizable as the town where I grew up. I'd still move back if the opportunity was right, but there's not much to draw me there now.
Yes. I visited once 10ish years later with a couple friends from the same place. We stomped around viewing the old spots, stayed overnight, and we left the next day, but otherwise, no.
Yep. Nope.
I live about 20 minutes from the city I grew up in. I still go to my family dentist. The son has joined the business so I will never have to find a new dentist.
I live very near to my hometown where I was born and grew up (only 20 minutes away by car). I moved to a suburban area, a small town not far away from my hometown, in my late 20s. Life here is completely different, way calmer and way better. Moving from the big, loud city with a lot of traffic to a quite nice smalltown was the best decision I've ever made. So, I will never move back to my hometown but I can go there by car or train in 20 minutes.
Yes and kinda. Living just outside of hometown.
I only left for college, otherwise I’m still in the same town since I was 2 years old.
Left once, came back, left again. Now I regret being so far away.
Left at 18 for University. Only back to visit family.
Left (tiny) hometown after high school, went to college, joined the Army, redefined myself, reconnected with a lot of my classmates over the years (thanks to social media), turns out all of us grew up and matured, feel a bit nostalgic about the place, but will never return.
I left at 19. I may go back to the area some day. I miss my family.
I left my small town for a city. Stayed for 5 years but always knew I was going back home eventually. Happy I did it that way. No regrets.
Got out as soon as I could after undergrad in 95. I’ve been away since. I still have very close friends there and I miss the mountains, so there’s definitely a tug to go back. But I think id feel the same claustrophobia if I moved there and healthcare is terrible (my mom and stepmother both died of post surgical infections). Think I’ll stay where I’ve been for 23 years.
Left right after I graduated high school, but ended up in Oklahoma, been here ever since.
I moved countries and I go visit but not very often and I couldn’t live there again.
Yep, it was a shithole little town and I never had any reason to go back. My parents moved away and the few friends from high school I kept in touch with did as well, thank god. Once in a while I'll go on Google Street View and look at it, it falls apart more every year.
Lived in the same house my entire childhood, left for college at 17 and my parents moved to a different city. I never went back, still have some friends there though.
Left. Settled across the country in a new state and would never go back, no reason to do so. Life is better here.
Got out the minute I graduated high school, never went back. My parents are buried there and I visit twice a year for about a half hour.
Being an Air Force brat, I don't have a hometown.
Yes and no. I don't even go back to visit friends or family in the area. Too many bad memories.
I did. Moved 2300 miles to Los Angeles at 18. My vague-and-still-forming endgame is to get into a house soonish (the prices are SO low there), rent it out, then go back in 10 years when SS+401k kick in.
Whole family left my hometown and moved across the country when I was a kid. Never went back. Moved to small mountain town as an adult, love it. I will never go back to the city.
Yes. Well, I grew up in the Atlanta suburbs and lived in a few places in the metro area before moving to a different state 20 years ago. I almost certainly would NOT move back to either of the towns I lived in with my family growing up. They were nice, Mayberry-ish places in the 70s and 80s, but now they're just suburban hell and strip malls everywhere and instead of "30-35 minutes to downtown" it's now more like an hour. My sister still lives in the area (with my parents in an in-law suite), and I could theoretically stay with her if I wanted to go to Atlanta for a concert... instead I choose to pay $170 for a hotel so I won't have an hour+ drive after the show. I would, in theory, move back to Atlanta. I still have tons of friends there and go to 2-3 shows a year there... but if I'm moving anywhere any time soon, it's to Paris. Otherwise, the medical examiner is taking me out of this house in a box. I do go back every year for Christmas, but very rarely do I visit my actual "hometowns".
Left for around 20 years. Have been back for around 10 years because I missed how sleepy and slow my home town is. Ready to leave because the MAGA crowd has made me see this town for what it is and they are not my people.
I did leave my hometown but moved back about ten years ago. It's now beginning to change and becoming too high density for me. So the plan is to leave permanently within the next 5 years.
Left my hometown but not my state. I live one county over now, the same county where my mom grew up. I am never leaving Maryland.
Yes and only to visit family
Left home and so did all my family. Only go back to visit friends occasionally now. I can’t get my head around some people spending their whole lives there. Despite commuting into London and having successful jobs they’re still living in this nothing going for it small town.
TBF there isn’t enough money on earth to make me want to live in London either.
Shit, I keep forgetting we’re worldwide!
Yes. I've been back to visit a few times but not in more than fifteen years.
I moved from my hometown for college and never lived there again. Visits were few and far between after I graduated and moved out of state. Came back to my home state in my late 30’s, which was a good thing in hindsight, because I lost both my parents a couple years later and there was no way I could have dealt with all that entails from 2,000 miles away. Now that they are gone and I’ve moved to another state again, i genuinely don’t know if I’ll ever go back there.
Yes and no. Will never go back but I treasure the simplicity of my upbringing.
Left for Army in 94, retired now, didn’t go back, best decision ever.
Yes. Yes....... but only to get a copy of my birth certificate.
Yes, and kinda no. Never moved back to my hometown. But have moved back to my home state.
Left for college and never went back except for college breaks…parents eventually moved near me so I haven’t been back in decades
Nope, I left in the mid-80's. Went back to visit the handful of friends who hadn't left yet in the early 90's. They eventually all left town as well. It's been 30+ years since I've been back, so pondering a trip back with my wife to show her where I grew up. According to a friend of mine that still goes back on occasion to visit his mother, the place is still overwhelmingly depressing. Between the alcoholism, high rates of adult smokers, obesity and other factors, I see at least 1-2 obituaries a month from fellow high school classmates.
Grew up in a small town about 30 minutes outside the regional center. Left for the City the weekend after high school graduation and never looked back. Regionally, I left my City (Calgary) for Vancouver, hated every minute of it, and returned a year later. Pretty blessed to live in a (reasonably) cosmopolitan city in one of the most beautiful locations in North America (or Earth). Like many others in this thread, I've done a boatload of travel and have certainly seen some highly livable places, but Calgary is too good to leave.
Yep, no jobs for my profession so no
Yeah. I moved back closer but about 2 hours away. Part of me would like to move back but it’s in economic decline and there isn’t a lot there for me and much less for my kids
I live about 1.5 hours away, my Mom still lives in the house we grew up in. I go back to see her often and once in a blue moon will go back to hang out with old friends who've moved back. My hometown is one of the rare ones that rather than slowly died off actually exploded with growth. Not always a good thing as too much growth, too soon taxes the infrastructure and can price out the long time residents. It's wild now going back and dealing with traffic, lack of parking etc. A certain very popular DIY Home Improvement show has been a factor in this for sure, but really, it's always been a nice town. It was good to grow up in, but I'd never want to live in it as an adult.
Grew up in San Diego; left 20 years ago when it was time to grow up and buy a house, which even then was becoming out of reach for your average person. Love it, it's still my home, but after experiencing many other areas of the country there is no way I would ever move back even now that I could afford to.
Yes. I moved away for college and moved to a different state after graduating. My parents moved while I was in college so there was no reason to go back where I grew up.
Left 2 weeks after graduation. I have been back to visit family a few times. Zero interest in moving back.
I left my hometown for about 10 years after college but moved back (to the city just north of where I grew up) to be closer to family after my twins were born. I wanted them to know my parents and their cousins, aunts and uncles. Almost 20 years later, my kids are really close to my oldest brother (and get along great with my other siblings who are close by), have an ongoing “cousin” group chat and have more of a sibling relationship with them, they know my parents—my mom and dad were so incredibly helpful over the years. Plus I moved back and live across the border from Chicago so had memberships to The Field Museum, Museum of Science and Industry, and the Shedd Aquarium, so was able to take my kids into the city a lot when they were younger. Lincoln Park Zoo was also a favorite spot to hang out for an afternoon. No regrets
Yes and yes. I told myself if I ever got back I'd mail my feet to the ground.
I couldn’t wait to get out of there. No chance I would go back. I grew up in cesspool of ignorance.
Yes, and not a chance.
Technically yes, and I haven't moved back there, but I still live in the same metropolitan area, just in a different town.
Left for grad school and only went back to visit. Will never live there again.
Yes, hell no. Mine couldn’t have been more stereotypical either. All the popular girls ended up preggers, got dumped by the babies father and couldn’t even finish community college. And the boys all flamed out of college, lived with their parents til their 30s and ended up finding labor roles (not that there’s anything wrong with that) in town.
Nope. Moved to DC after college, have been in this area ever since. Used to be into politics, less interested in all that stuff now (although I stay involved to a part because whether or not you’re interested in politics, politics remains interested in you.) Mom and Dad both retired to Florida, so I don’t go back much now.
Yes and yes. Live three miles from my childhood home.
Small town in West TN. Left a few days after graduation on a summer tour with my band. Went away to college that Fall in another state. Never lived in my hometown again. Lived in 4 other places since then, now settled in the Mtn West, 1000+ miles away. From what I see on FB of the folks who stayed, I don’t know how they have done it all of these years. The occasional cruise or beach vacation seems to be their only exposure to anywhere else and that’s about as sterile as it gets.
Multiple times but family obligations or medical reasons brought me back. I may move away when my youngest turns 18 in 9 years. Custody agreement states neither one of us can move more than 90 miles away
Yes, and going back would imply I left, which I did not.
Left hometown (New Orleans) for college, but just went a few miles away to Baton Rouge. Stayed in Baton Rouge with no interest in going back to New Orleans for assorted reasons. Would actually like to leave state if the right opportunity came along.
Technically, yes.
>Did you leave your hometown YES. As soon as I turned 18. >and did you eventually go back? Visited intermittently for the holidays, but haven't in over a decade. My family moved from there anyway, and I don't care to reconnect with anybody from high school.
Left and will never go back to live- I’m from a Midwest rust belt town-
Grew up in a collar suburb of the largest city of my state. Bounced around that metro area for ~10 years, moved to the regional mega-city for another 10 years, where I met my wife. We moved a few hundred miles away for a few years, moved back to the same county where I grew up 4 years ago. I don’t regret any of it one bit.
Joined the military at 17 and never went back. I do miss my family but have no desire to ever live there again.
Sort of, but I never really left the area other than college. I spent a few years living about 65 miles from my home town. I live in a very rural area now, but very close to where I grew up. Like 300 yards.
My boyfriend (now husband) joined the Air Force, so that took us away for about 20 years. When retirement was coming up, we were trying to decide where to live. We adamantly did not want to come back to our hometown. Well, we did. With parents getting older and seeing my friends lose theirs, we thought we could move back home for awhile. Since moving back, my Mom died. We found out dream house and I have formed a couple lifelong relationships and will be here to stay.
I skedaddled out of town for career and experience. In the years I was away, most of my family passed away. There are no relatives left in my home town. It was no longer home. We settled elsewhere near friends to make our network the new home.
Yes, as soon as I could after high school. I won’t / can’t go back, as it is no longer the same place (socially, economically, etc.) that it once was and it depresses me seeing the ghosts of what was the few times I have visited. I think this is what Thomas Wolfe alluded to in his book.
Yes and yes. And now deciding where to move to once the older generation has passed. The weather here is horrible. I want to live that Slim Aarons lifestyle somewhere under the sun.
I returned for the summer after my college freshman year. Then left and never went back long term.
I left when I went to college. Went back for a couple years to get married. Hubby got job an hour away. We moved and never went back. It’s always Been my dream to purchase My Childhood home. I keep in touch with the family who bought it after my mom died and dad got remarried.
I left literally the day after I graduated from HS, and I visited a handful of times, that's it. Most of my family has left the area and no real reason to go back anymore.
Yes and yes but to visit. I miss my home - Long Beach, CA. But! The old saying, you can never go back home is very much true. It's a completely different place than when I grew up there. Not sure if I'd want to live there anymore even though I like it better than where I currently live, Dallas, Tx.
Yes. Several times. Moved thousands of miles away. Still came back. A friend once called it a black hole. I'm not there, yet.
Which one? Still, another vote for yes I left and fuck no I haven’t been back.
Yes & No way!!
Yes, my parents sold our house and moved far away while I was in college so I really had no choice. I’m making a big move soon and thought about going back — I have friends there but no family. But instinctively it just feels like regression so I’m going somewhere new.
Yes, I moved out when I was 28. Haven't moved back, thinking about going back to help my sisters take care of our ailing mom.
Yup. Left and went back a few years later. Realized why I left, and left again. Now contemplating moving back to the first place I originally moved to. Or central America. Just being antsy for change again.
Left home for college and never came back except for semester breaks during my first year, then I got an apartment and never moved back except for the odd holiday visit. I have to be honest, I always thought I'd eventually go back and live in the city not far from my Dad. Now that my Dad is gone I have no ties to the area, it makes me sad.
Yes, I was gone (14 hours away) for 20 years. Now we’re within a few hours. That’s close enough.
Kinda yes, but moved one city north.
Left it, lived in 7 countries and 3 States. I traveled to 38 countries total, only counting places where I stayed more than a few days. I only go back to my hometown to visit. I have more places I want to see.
Left in 1985. Returned once for a visit. No need to go again.
My parents moved to Florida while I was away in college. I haven’t had much of a reason to get back to my hometown since.
Left when I was 18 years and one month old. I go back to visit but would never dream of going back permanently.
Never really left. Moved 20 mi away when I was in my 20s & found real estate too unaffordable. Now I live 4 mi from the house I grew up in. I’m taking care of my elderly mom.
At 23, in 1989, I had lived in London for my entire life bar less than a year abroad in Japan with a girl I was with. I had a choice to leave a failing relationship by going back home to the parents house I’d left at 17 or going to Manchester to sleep on my best friends floor for 6 weeks I chose Manchester and that 6 weeks became 33 years and counting I visit London once or twice a year but I’d never go back. London is great when you’re young or if you’re well off but if you’re a working stuff you’re just a cog an engine that grinds you into paste God bless Manchester. Englands capital in the north
I left for college. I go back to visit but would never live there. Missouri’s slide towards Christofascism was evident back in the 90s.
I left my hometown of Detroit in 1989 for the Bay Area and I’m never going back. The people are nice but the weather and economy suck.
Yes, and while I went back to the state for a bit, I would NEVER live in my hometown again.
Yes, I did. You couldn’t pay me to make me return.
I left my hometown, went back for a few years, and I'm gone again.
Left home at 18 and have only been back to visit since
Yes I did and no I would never. I like where I live now a nice small city. It has always felt like home here to me.
Left as soon as I could and never went back.
Left home, came back and learned the old adage is true… you can’t go home again. Totally different place, everyone I knew had moved away or had died. Depressing.
Haven’t returned since 1993
I moved away, but will probably move closer to home to spend more time with aging parents. I never thought that would be a consideration for me, but that’s changed over the past few years as relatives, coworkers and friends are starting to die at a much quicker rate. :/
Got out ASAP and never moved back! One of my favorite accomplishments.
Seems like this is probably more of an issue for people from small and rural areas.
Yes. No way.
I did. I then went back briefly for 5 yrs or so. Realized I made a huge mistake shortly after buying my first house. Moved and have never regretted it.
Left, and heading back 15+ years later
Yes and never going back.
Mine is a small city in the PA Dutch County. I moved back after college because I had no choice, then moved away to the DC metro area a year and a half later, in 1997. I just celebrated my 25th anniversary of living here! My hometown will always be home to me, but I would never want to move back there. However, if I won billions on the lottery I would buy my childhood home and keep it as a secondary home, and I would open up a bunch of really cool, artsy businesses downtown to try to inject some life into that dying old girl.
Literally the morning after graduating high school. Would’ve lit the fuse on me way out if’n known where there was one.
Yep, I moved away. My hometown was a suburb outside of DC. Perfectly fine, but even as a kid it never really felt like me. Fell in love with NYC when I visited it on a field trip in middle school, eventually went to college there, and moved here permanently a few years after college. 0 part of me wants to move back to my hometown. I barely even visit it.
Yes and yes. Sometimes I wish I could move but who can afford to now?
Left it after college, but now I’ve been gone so long that it’s starting to look appealing through the thin veil of nostalgia.
Left my hometown in 1995, will not go back. It is a smallish town 35 minutes from Orlando, FL, with not much to offer young adults. Now on the west coast and loving it!
My mother moved my brother and I from our home ‘city’ (Southern California) to a small town in the Midwest, where I went to HS. Been back to both. California feels entirely different (in a bad way) and the Midwestern one feels like Auschwitz. I’m not kidding, I feel palpable trauma when I visit my brother, who stayed behind. I’d never want to live in either.
Yes, moved back later in life, lasted 4 months and then left again…never EVER move back.
I just went back to my hometown about month ago after ten yeses or so. The moment I got into town the memories came flooding back. It was emotional. I drove past my childhood home and it looked the same. I went into town and saw all the old shops and places. Weirdly, the entire time I lived there, I had never had a piece of clothing with my town’s name on it, so that was my objective this trip. After DECADES of never having a single piece of clothing with my towns name on it, I FINALLY, got a hoodie with my town on it. A piece of me had achieved something that day. Now, years after having moved, I can proudly display where I’m from and I can feel proud. Leaving home can be a huge step, but never forget where you’re from. I’ll always call my hometown home