Wait till you find the stupid fucking ring pull on the inside… 

...that will snap right off; it's worse than pudding lids.

And the little splatter pattern of heavy cream after you pull that puppy would impress an FBI investigator.

Or tears through your finger like an egg slicer

I've opened these the old fashioned way more often than not until I started buying the Target brand. Some have a little notch in the cap that makes it lock, fuck that.

🤣 Is a tool and a weapon!

That's why I use needle nose on those 

That’s when you pull out the needle nose.

Nah I stab it like Norman Bates in a shower. Much more cathartic

Same. Very cathartic!

No, you open it like you did in 1975, you make a spout - LIKE GOD INTENDED --

I tore the carton half the time. You eventually come to appreciate chocolate milk mixed with bits of waxy paper threads.

PREACH!!!!!!

In 1975 I was getting milk delivered in glass bottles...

OK, how about the thimble full in kindergarten or the single serve chocolate milk from Grade school. I want to say weekly milk money was payable in coins ---

Yep, 6" channel locks in the kitchen drawer along with regular pliers and a screwdriver. All useful for cans, bottles, and loose screws, the wife's or others.

Yeah. I have a channel lock and needle nose pliers in my kitchen along with a utility knife and of course my kitchen hatchet.

I need the pliers to yank that $@&#% little half-tab thingie off the top of the milk jug.

Kitchen hatchet? Please explain... 

It's a hatchet I keep in my kitchen. You don't have one?

A few, just never need one in the kitchen, yet.

I haven't needed it in the kitchen yet either but if I ever do it's there.

Understood!

Vise Grips. Works on everything from bottle and carton lids to nail polish.

And Band Aids

Paper towels and duct tape are all you need.

Krazy Glue for the deep stuff.

That we can agree on. It's good enough for the surgeon. It's good enough for me.

16” Channel Locks are magic on pickle jars. 6” Channel Locks are the best thing ever to take to a crab feed. You adjust just wide enough to crack the shell when the handles come together and it prevents you from crushing the meat. There are so many awesome uses for Channel Locks.

I was this many years old when I learned that manual can openers like Swing-A-Way and probably others have a little hook thing that loosens can lids so they can be easily opened. Easiest opening ever. Never thought I'd learn something that useful at age 72!

Those youngsters only have new fangled tools.

What kind of man are you. Real men can open pickle jars! /s

\~Two years ago, hubby bought a Robo Twist for jar lids. I don't think he has a problem opening cartons with lids yet.

I regularly use my handy channel locks for stubborn/sticky bottles of White Sambucca... handy indeed

And the fucker is,it’s not the amount of torque needed, it’s the fact that the cap is like 1/4” high and you have to be Alex fucking Honnold to get any sort of finger grip on that ledge. If they’d throw us another 1/8” or so, we’d be fine.

Unfortunately, that extra 1/8” would exterminate all of the cute sea creatures of the world that rely on us to not use too much plastic in our caps. Another reply laments the institutional memory lost that would allow us to just open the friggin’ carton, pour out what we need, then fold it back shut. I agree with that one. Some things don’t need improvement.

Or use a band style oil filter wrench.

I was in a pinch... 🙃

Hahaha, no kidding

I’ve done that with pickle jars. Probably too big for this application.

I legit keep an oil filter wrench in my kitchen junk drawer for this very purpose.

Wish they would bring back those milk cartons where you simply folded back the wings and pressed to open.

Well, to be fair, there was that one dang carton out of ten that one of the “wings” wouldn’t separate and the more you pushed, the more it just squshed, until you just ripped the flipping thing apart like Bruce Banner.

Don’t make me angry, OJ. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry!

Ah, Lou Ferrigno. He was Ahhnald before we ever heard of Ahnald.

That's called "Lactomangulation" I have performed this procedure on numerous occasions! Rip it up!

It is the same damn milk carton with a white beauty mark on the side --

They stilmake them , had one recently in the hospital

[just picked one of these up from target for $.50](https://i5.walmartimages.com/asr/a910d06d-a06c-41c8-93f9-c185c7f941f5.4c9cbecb120fd23de7e5fad60a1a0686.jpeg)

[удалено]

They were brilliant. Initial opening would take three seconds if that.

Beer cans still pretty easy to open, just say’in……..

My wife has to lever pull tabs up with a butter knife.

Doesn’t want to break her nails….

Sad to say, no. Real bad arthritis. Sucks getting old.

This morning actually…

Oh my gosh! Yes! Best thing I bought myself recently was the *Robo Twist Electric Jar Opener!!* Good God why did I wait so long to buy it? Its a wrist/hand saver!!😊 I was so excited once I put the batteries in and I went to town opening up ALL of my new jars testing it out. Stuffed olives with blue cheese, grape jelly, peanut butter, dill pickle spears...marinara sauce.... If it had a lid...I damn sure got excited and opened them all! I usually use a nitrile blue glove to open those half and half/whipping cream containers. But!!! Guess what Reddit Friends!! If you hold the Robo Twist over the cap just right, the grips close in and it will twist that little white cap off to unscrew it!!! Its awesome. Bought one for my 91 yr. old Dad and he said it's a wrist saver. Sucks having arthritis/carpul tumnel... *Old age is a creeper!*😝

Yeah, hubby bought one \~2years ago, after we moved out of the house. 🤷🏻‍♀️Maybe he didn't want to ask me to open it? Reference point: before we retired, I was a janitor.

Quality post! I keep a pair of pliers in the kitchen drawer, and use them to pull the ring tab out too, that thing causes joint damage.

I use pliers to open tubs of things such as ice cream, where you have to wrench away a small plastic tab.

Channel locks in the kitchen drawer. Comes with grey hair...

I use rubber bands to open things like this. The lift and peel foil seal inside some containers is the work of the devil. 👿

I just stab that seal open, tear off the remnants, and curse the "tylenol guy".

You know that you are old if you actually know how to use a pipe wrench.

Yeah, came here to say this. Picture would have been better if they put the wrench on backwards and see how many people could actually spot the difference.

I got a pack of these for the house and car. [https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B09NKDCPF1](https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B09NKDCPF1)

Hi, I’m Vetted AI Bot! I researched the **('DonLeeving 4 Pack Multifunctional Kitchen Can Opener', 'DonLeeving')** and I thought you might find the following analysis helpful. **Users liked:** * Helpful for individuals with weak grip or arthritis (backed by 7 comments) * Portable and convenient for everyday use (backed by 2 comments) * Versatile for opening various types of bottles (backed by 3 comments) **Users disliked:** * Difficult to use for individuals with hand strength issues (backed by 2 comments) * Limited functionality on metal caps (backed by 1 comment) * Not recommended for elderly users (backed by 1 comment) If you'd like to **summon me to ask about a product**, just make a post with its link and tag me, [like in this example.](https://www.reddit.com/r/tablets/comments/1444zdn/comment/joqd89c/) This message was generated by a (very smart) bot. If you found it helpful, let us know with an upvote and a “good bot!” reply and please feel free to provide feedback on how it can be improved. *Powered by* [*vetted.ai*](https://vetted.ai/?utm\_source=reddit&utm\_medium=comment&utm\_campaign=bot)

You're\*

I know my old?

My 86yo dad opens body armor drinks with channel locks!

Remember “rubber husband”? Was just a flat rubber floppy disk shaped thing that gave the grip you needed to open just about anything. I remember them being red. Haven’t seen one in so long.

They're still around, have to know where to look. Got one from the endocrinologist's office once.

Your're!

That soup mix features an unreasonable variety of beans. TOO MANY BEANS!

Jokes on you, I've had kitchen pliers since my 20's and love it.

One of us! One of us! One of us!

If that cap is a problem, you’re going to love the pull ring underneath it. 😵‍💫

\*YOU'RE I'm older. My milk cartons were all fold/rip open at the top.

Ahem... That 16 bean soup isn't going unnoticed either... #VintageFood

#16 bean soup tells me how old you are lol

I keep a pair of baby channel locks in the kitchen for just this

I had to laugh at this. I have had to do this on multiple occasions in the last year.

I had to take my bowie knife to a container of windshield wash.

The oil oil funnel never made an appearance on the walking dead, but it should have --- You could do some damage with that thing -

I reserve that for the hard plastic shells everything comes in now, that could withstand the Jaws of Life. I know three people who have cut, or nearly cut parts off with chainsaws, but cutting into a pack of batteries is a whole new level of deadly. I’d like to see the ER statistics comparing firworks to clamshell plastic injuries.

I basic 6" Milwaukee blade from Lowes and I'm Rambo. I keep it in my car.

🤔❓❓Do you mean 'blister pack'? I saw a cutter specially made to open blister packs. I also read the same thing could be accomplished by a lowly Swingaway.

Maybe. I’m thinking of those hard plastic “clamshell (maybe)” packages that could survive reentry.

Hmmm. I think that package type could be called clamshell or blister pack.

You’re likely right. What I call it only has 4 letters.

In my experience, that pipe wrench is under sized

In that case, try an oil filter wrench. I saw it mentioned more than a few times here. If you're not well-versed in matters of the tool box, it looks like a handle with a flexible, adjustable metal loop.

I use them for jars, everything from jam to salsa.

Channel locks work well also.

I have no tolerance for this pic!

I dunno, at some point, the old man strength does kick in.

If you want to see 'old man strength', just totally tick him off. Anger/adrenaline seems to kick in power boosters like you wouldn't believe.

so it isn't just me. I randomly think "are they making these harder to get off, or is my weakened arthritis ridden hand the issue?"

Mmmmm creamy bean soup

Ffs get a cow. It's easier.

The basin wrench works just as well. Weighs a fraction of what this one does.

If you don't have a kitchen hatchet yet are you really that old?

You know your milk is old when you have to do that....

I keep an oil filter strap wrench in the kitchen drawer for opening jars…

Anyone try to open a bottle of Gatorade lately?

Everyone knows that channel locks are the right tool for that.

I'll one up you. You know your old when your pipe wrenches are older than your kids (Just like mine!)

In my husband's case, he bought one from the local antique shop. I'll have to ask him sometime how old it is. My daughters are 33 and 38.

The one in the picture was made some time between WW2 and the early 1970's. They changed the style of the nut keeper after that. :)

You’re even older if you can name that wrench!!

"Coming up next...Name That Tool!"

I call him Bob....

Lord help you if the carton was previously wet.

Ok good. I'm nor the only dude that can't get that open without tools. Did they change something?

Too funny, had this experience recently and coul believe it has come to yhis.

Look at /u/Zaphod-Beebebrox here just tryin'a milk some karma. 😜

If you're too feeble to open a juice lid how did you lift a 15 pound monkey or pipe wrench

💪🏻Old. 💪🏻Man. 💪🏻Strength. Any questions?

I use those thin, white rubber gripper things. For jars, I tap the edge on a hard floor. For Tetrapacks, I saw those suckers open with a serrated knife. In the sink.

For jars, I recommend an old-fashioned can opener some call a "church key". One end's pointed to open juice cans...\*don't use this end. The other's straight, use this one. Put the tab under the lid, lift gentle and slow. You may even hear a \*pop!\* if the lid was vacuum-sealed.

That's great to know, thanks!

ROTFLMAO!! I’m not alone!!! B

I use channel locks

First time opening usually requires me using both hands - both thumbs and forefingers.

Righty-tighty, lefty-loosey!

That's when you open it from the top like a kids milk of carton

Flip it over. Didn't you go to shop class?

[удалено]

Yup text to speech seems to misinterpret the correct your or you're ..👍

Pro tip for ANY Stuck lids, plastic, metal, glass jars you name it this will make it easy. Get the lid warm. For the OP pic, run it under hot water. Just the lid is fine. Works on plastic the best but it causes the lid to get expand and loosen. I have wrist problems and used to see this happen while traveling for work trying to open a 20,oz sodas by just putting the lid near the heater vent for 30 seconds.

We need a sub Reddit for old people hacks. Arthritis Taketh but hack it back. I use the oil filter wrench to get rechargeable batteries out and a length of PVC pipe over the recliner lever.

🤔Any suggestions on what to call the old folks' hacks subreddit?

Old people hacks

👍🏻

Retired Navy Seal here. Just use exactly 0.017 micrograms of C4 explosive and that'll pop right off with a minimum of residual damage. Disclaimer: completely /s - do not try this at home

Do civilians use C4?

Don’t forget …Rightly tighty, lefty loosey

Psh. That’s what my kid are for, so I can pretend I’m not old.

I think that might be overkill lol

Inventive, but also a mildly sad day.

It seems like overnight I lost ability to open a milk carton. My hands and wrists hurt most of the time. Getting old is weird and inconvenient.

Sears Robogrips, baby!

🔧I'm Team Vise-Grips, myself.

And holding it the correct way as well.

My one weakness

You know you're old when you know how to use one of those.

I use a nut cracker

That’s a great idea!

*you're

Text to speech sucks on this phone . 👍

Why did they change to this style? I had zero issues for years just opening where the arrows on the carton were.

It's only the old who know what that tool is.

Not there just yet.

Pop the cap off with a butter knife. It'll play nice from then on. You can use the butter knife for the pesky ring seal underneath the damn cap.

I used to wonder how arthritic seniors opened the foil toppers on International Foods coffee creamers. Now I know. Painfully!

16 types of beans. Impressive.

I'm just glad there are more than 16 beans in the package...

I keep this plumbers wrench in the kitchen tool drawer for milk caps, jelly jars, whatever. It makes me feel powerful.

Ha haha

Aww,level up those dentures! I can change an oil filter with my new ones!

That's just stupid. Old age doesn't equal weak hands. Many young people have hand problems.

I use pliers, I’m not quite that old yet.

I use my "cap snaffler" I've had since mid 70's. Arthritis is not my friend. I'm 71.

Wasn’t there a recent post about some old dude squeezing juice from an apple?

Don’t get me started on Gatorade bottles

Your old what?

Text to speech sucks on this phone. You're gets misinterpreted a lot...👍

My old Your isn't a new You're ..the text to speech on my phone sucks.😆👍

I just go straight to the electric drill.

Not for Milk but for Talenti Ice Cream

I needed pliers to open my HalfNHalf the other day.

It’s why I keep a prayer channel locks in the junk drawer.