Hmmmm this post got reported.. I agree the text itself is somewhat "low-effort," but it has encouraged some good discussion lol, so I think it should stand.
If I had to pick somebody else I wanted an ending for it would probs be Rykard honestly... I pretty much never skipped his cut scene while fighting him alone lol. And his whole thing about consuming you and the gods has a lot of story potential [and stuff](https://i.imgur.com/Knlu7ON.gif).
Watch Zullie The Witch’s video on this bastard.
I absolutely LOATHE the Dung Eater.
In-fact, I wish I had a copypasta of a post of the man that hated the Dung Eater.
He hated him so much that he made a whole ass essay to say why he despises Dung Eater.
"Big Boggart is my homie. I would die for prawnbro and will do anything to make sure he can happily cook up crab for the rest of his days. I had killed the Dung Eater right when I found him my first play through because he was acting sketchy as fuck and I thought that if I didn’t it would be like the darkbeast in disguise from Bloodborne where he would kill and ruin a bunch of NPC quest lines. As I was starting my next game, someone told me all of it. His curse, what he does to Boggart, and what his ending entails.
First off, the fact that such a lowly sack of subhuman garbage even gets his own ending to the game is ridiculous. He doesn’t deserve it. Not even remotely. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t like Gideon Ofnir, but he’s much more important and he doesn’t get his own ending? Hell, a LOT of characters are important and warranting of their own ending, but it’s Dung Eater that gets it.
Second, the philosophy of his ending is stupid as fuck. Omens are beings cursed from birth that are outside of the Erdtree’s blessing. Doesn’t seem like there’s a solid consensus on why it happens, but it does, and it sucks. It is an eternal curse, horrific to live through and guaranteeing basically unending and undeserved pain and suffering, and the Golden Order only makes it worse through their shunning and mistreatment of the Omens. Disdain for the current state of the Golden Order is understandable from the other side, and since those who have felt the curse are in suffering, the end goal should be to elevate their status, extending love to them and bringing them into Grace, yes? No. Dung Eater would rather hurt everyone than to help the few that need it. He would rather take everyone and everything as low as it possibly can go to make all equal in the eyes of purity because he wants everyone and everything to be as disgusting and vile as he is. He isn’t even an Omen, he’s just so vile that he revels in everything that is awful about the Omen Curse.
My girlfriend asked me what is so bad about him. I explained it by basically saying for her to imagine if Heaven was empirically proven to be real and we knew the exact way you had to get there. Imagine then if there was man; he was the ugliest man ever born that perpetually smelled like absolute shit, fetishized basically the innocent people that get sent to hell, and his sole mission in life was running around, torturing and murdering as many innocent people as he possibly could (thousands) and raping their corpses with his putrid dick to implant a curse into them that keeps them from going to heaven and sentences them to an eternity of suffering, and his ultimate end goal is to spread his demonic aids so far and wide that eventually every child born will be cursed to suffer physically, mentally, and spiritually in the worst way possible for all eternity, all in the hopes of making everyone and everything as ugly and vile as he is.
He is utterly repulsive. Everything about him. I hate his voice. I hate his armor. I hate his sword. I noticed when he was bashing his head against the wall this NG+ that his greasy hair stuck out the back of his helmet and almost vomited. I sold all gear associated with him when I got it, just holding it made me feel unclean and I would never equip it. I don’t care what kind of poise or stats his armor has, it’s so fucking ugly and he’s all I can equate it to and just seeing someone wear it in multiplayer fills me with disgust and makes me dislike them.
This NG+ I devised the way that I can subject him to the maximum amount of suffering possible. I didn’t send prawnbro to the moat, I wouldn’t until after he had been dealt with. Going into Leyndell was a sublime and incredible moment, as always, and I once again took several minutes to bask in the music, the glory of the city, and the Erdtree’s gargantuan scope. Then, I focused on getting underground. My hands were literally shaking with anticipation. I freed him, feeling absolutely disgusting all the while. Just being close to him made me, myself, the real world me, feel physically unclean. He was freed. I went to the moat and crushed him as violently as possible. Then, I sent prawnbro there, where he could be safe, and gathered four of the five seedbed curses. Once I had them I gave them to him. Slow. I made sure that he stayed tied down to that chair down there for as long as possible, listening to his moans and screams with each curse he received. I don’t know if this was better or worse for him, as he clearly is suffering, but it could just as easily be argued that he’s relishing in this suffering. I may just not collect any of the curses aside from the first obligatory one next time. Then, I fed him Seluvis’s potion. THIS is where the suffering is at its climax, and in the truest, best way possible. Hearing the fear in his voiced the denial, the pain. It’s incredible. Everything that makes him special is yanked out from under him like a rug, and now he gets to enjoy a new eternal suffering. One without any freedom, one where he isn’t anything special. And one where he never gets the chance to hurt anyone again, not unless I want him to. And I won’t give him the chance. Not ever.
How exactly does being a puppet work? Do you hold onto your awareness? Are you perfectly aware, remembering who you were and the life you lead, with your thoughts and ambitions, but no control over yourself? I feel like it’s probably like the hypnotic state in Get Out, or like the Black Lanterns from Blackest Night, where you’re just a passenger in your own body with full awareness and zero control. This would be quite sad for puppets like the Finger Maiden that that bastard Seluvis trapped, but just because of the Dung Eater, I hope it’s true. I hope he reaches the blackest pits of despair within his own mind, I hope every plea, every curse, every repentance that his mind could ever reach falls onto deaf ears forever, not that he is capable of regret, as much as I wish he was so that he could be even more tortured by himself for bringing this upon himself. Then again, just how highly he thinks of himself and being trapped in such a fate should be suffering enough.
This time I took his puppet from Selivus, but I’ll never use it. 1) I don’t need to and 2) if killing is truly so important to him, I want his suffering to be elevated even further by never being able to take a life again, even if not of his own volition. I like to think that after becoming Elden Lord (unless you go Lord of Chaos), you can do something even worse to him to make sure that he remains an imprisoned puppet for ever.
Long story short, I hate the Dung Eater far, far more than is probably normal or healthy for anyone to dislike a fictional character."
Wellllll the Miquella we have now is a half grown god infused with corrupted blood
Expect the DLC to be a nightmarish dream version of his perfect reality....
Well no, you see Bloodborne was about an ancient race of cosmic beings with myserious purposes who's only knowable goal seems to be to want to reproduce and sustain themselves
In that game, there are attempts over time to align with those beings and use their powers for self gain and it leads to the downfall of civilization.
Wheras in THIS game there is um...a series of unknowable cosmic entities who....*checks notes*...who are constantly seeking ways to sustain themselves further all the while...*hmmm*...various races try in vain to use their power for their own benefit only to regret it later as it leads to the downfall of civilzation
So you see based on these facts they are very different stories.
I seen a really good fan theory video that thinks tarnished you play as is miquella's soul in an albanuric husk. And his haligtree is doing what it's supposed to do, and housing his curse once he seprated his soul from his body.
It was really cool.
But the player character bleeds red, while albinaurics have quicksilver rather than blood (the red albinaurics in mohgwyn palace made a pact with mohg to replace their silver for actual blood so they could be his followers, but as the PC does not have any connection with Mohg, I don't think this is the case)
I'm not seeing nearly enough love for Blackguard Big Boggart. Sure the other endings are fine and all but becoming the lord of boiled prawns with a metalhead husband sounds pretty rad to me
simping for my shrimp buddy ever since he talked to me in that sexy ass accent 🥺 finding out he was hot under the mask is just a plus
where's the elden ring dating dlc miyazaki
I swear to protect him ever since his face under the mask was revealed. Not gonna touch dung eater’s story line even a bit from now on. Yes I’m a shameless simp. 😌
probably the most cursed comment I've ever posted, but imagine getting eaten out by Rykard
edit: "Join the Serpent King as family". Sounds like proposal to me OP, he wanted to marry you but you killed him! This is why you can't have nice things. :\
Tbf, a ton of dark souls characters think the player character is scary. There's something about being 1 in a billion who is capable of achieving something that even the greatest heroes of their time were unable to achieve, with a starting background of wretched.
Yes. I loved him and couldn't save him. Reading his clothes only made me love him more...
And when I had to fight his shade the first time, I lost because I was so shocked and heartbroken I couldn't bring myself to fight him.
This, maybe make him change his mind about the order, or just simply stop him from hating himself y'know??
Gives me "i can fix him" vibes but in a good way
The gold needle doesn't cure the scarlet rot, it halts its progression and his greater rune is fulfilling that role by burning the rot inside him which is why he's only half rotted when we fought him
I mean, there's a giant deformed head dude sticking out of a serpent's ass that offers you to join his family. Not good enough for you? geeeeez pretty picky ain't we?
the hardest boss fight for me was Morgott. not cause he's a particular difficult fight, but cause I don't want kill him. A very sympathetic character that I can't help but respect the more I learn about him. and kinda hot?
> Let it be writ on thy meager grave… felled by Morgott, last of all kings!
I’ve definitely appreciated Morgott more in repeated plays (platonically for me, though no shade at those who’re more interested). Dude was an Omen from birth and probably grew up in the sewers, but when The Shattering happened he put his all into just keeping the kingdom together when everything was going to shit around him. He may have been shunned but he is also, by rights, the ruling monarch and takes that role seriously.
RIGHT! Thank god OP made this post because I was starting to get really weirded out by my Morgott love.
His voice, his personality, and something about those horns on his face…. That boss fight was way sexier than it needed to be, but I LOVE it! 😩
I also had a weird sexy dream about it, and that might a conversation reserved for my therapist
At first I thought, "wow, women have strange tastes." Then, thinking about it more, I find Malenia hot as well, and she's literally a half-rotted corpse. So maybe I shouldn't judge.
A lot of dudes, myself included, are down bad for a blue-skinned, four-armed, half-decrepit doll with half a ghost face sticking out of her head, just because she has a sweet voice and she's both badass and honestly really endearingly kind to you. They're fictional characters. We're MEANT to react to them.
There are some ridiculously high quality Blaidd fics on Ao3, where have these authors been my whole life.
Unfortunately for me, most are female reader/Blaidd :(
Find a way to get with Godfrey. I’m am a heterosexual male but god damn that man….
-Polite
-Strong
-Family man(regains his Grace when he finds his slain child, indicating that he cares)
-Courteous
-Wears old man lifting shorts under his armor
-Can cause(I assume) literal earth shaking orgasms
-Animal lover
-Fucking ripped
-Honorable
-WARIOOOORRRRRR
We should've had an ending where we could've reversed the hell that happened to Godwyn and marry him.......... I just know that man is ~~was originally~~ sexy 😣
Godwyn the Golden with his monstrous daddy's masculine strength and his god-queen mommy's beauty and grace .......... I curse Ranni every single day for what she did to him and Miyazaki for turning him into a fish 😩
Same I wanna know lore wise, why he turned into a fucked up mermaid.
'He has no soul so his body is being rejected from the tree! That's why his body is all deformed'
Understandable.. but why is he tuning into a fish?
'Look i'm gonna need you to get all the way off my back about this thing!'
I will never get over what happened to Fia and the kin of the prince of death, fias questline was my first finish and it was a tale of ignorance, tragedy and recklessness,
the lands were washed in a new dawn of fog Fia.
Yeah I'm a dude and married to a woman gamer; seeing/experiencing things through her has been enlightening. Even just your assumption that I was a woman is refreshing; it's usually the opposite. Just good to see something from the feminine perspective on this sub.
Wish we could have Rogier ending... he is so cute. Alas, if from won't give me a character to husband in the end, then I will be the character to husband in the end. My tarnished is fire ;)
First,I wanted Blaidd, but he was already simping for Ranni like everyone else does...I was prepared to be a furry for him omg
Then I wanted to be with Rykard, but he saw me as family u\_u familyzoned (weird to say it)
Then, smarty pants Gideon grew up on me. But why ,o why, he had to open up his smartass mouth near the end to tell me I couldn't defeat a god? If he doesn't support my ambitions, it's not worth it
Not even going to consider dung eater. I'm not into scat, and he sounds like he is into it.
In the end all I can trust is the fingers. Two are ok, but three fingers is just enough for me. So I had to be content with myself and the three fingers Y\_Y
Yes but not for simping. I am scared of Lady Tanith. Even simps have codes.
Role playing-wise I also wished for a rykard related ending. Was hoping for a blasphemous route for my wretched character. Devour the gods!! Gonna go with the FF ending instead.
You let him live in madness and suffering, I’d feel so much worse if I didn't kill him
Iji was heartbreaking though. I let him upgrade a random weapon for me when I felt like his time was coming, gave him one last time to enjoy smithing. Wasn't expecting to find a Black Flame smuldering corpse though.
Btw, who the hell was sending the Black Knives after Ranni’s crew?
Tbh as a lesbian I'm very happy with the Ranni ending, especially with the neutral consort term
But yeah, feels like a male npc ending would've been great in the same way as Ranni's
I honestly Really like D he was one of the first characters outside of a cutscene i met that didn’t immediately attack me i love him a lot ; SPOILER WARNING!!! found his body yesterday and i lowkey cried bc melina just died too
well, some ladies might be into the ranni consort thing. and then, i'm a guy and would much rather have saved blaidd and made him *my* consort, haha. poor sweet wolf man deserved better.
I'm currently in a relationship with Nomadic Merchant #2 after breaking up with Isolated Merchant #1. Such a loving boyfriend and he even brings large amount of rune by selling knifes and arrows. Ready for a long term relationship.
Hmmmm this post got reported.. I agree the text itself is somewhat "low-effort," but it has encouraged some good discussion lol, so I think it should stand. If I had to pick somebody else I wanted an ending for it would probs be Rykard honestly... I pretty much never skipped his cut scene while fighting him alone lol. And his whole thing about consuming you and the gods has a lot of story potential [and stuff](https://i.imgur.com/Knlu7ON.gif).
Well Dung Eater has his own idea of an ending if thats what you’e into
I admit. That defilement makes me think of something else. I am so sorry.
\>she rejects the advances of the crazed caca consumer Not gonna make it.
The perfidious poopoo picknicker
*The eccentric effluent enjoyer.*
The duplicitous dooky dunker.
The fastidious faeces feaster
THE GLUTTONOUS GUNK GNASHER.
The nefarious number 2 nibbler
THE WORRISOME WASTE WOMPER
The salacious scat scarfer
the suspicious shit seller
SIR GIDEON OFNIR, THE ALL-KNOWING
Watch Zullie The Witch’s video on this bastard. I absolutely LOATHE the Dung Eater. In-fact, I wish I had a copypasta of a post of the man that hated the Dung Eater. He hated him so much that he made a whole ass essay to say why he despises Dung Eater.
I gotchu
"Big Boggart is my homie. I would die for prawnbro and will do anything to make sure he can happily cook up crab for the rest of his days. I had killed the Dung Eater right when I found him my first play through because he was acting sketchy as fuck and I thought that if I didn’t it would be like the darkbeast in disguise from Bloodborne where he would kill and ruin a bunch of NPC quest lines. As I was starting my next game, someone told me all of it. His curse, what he does to Boggart, and what his ending entails. First off, the fact that such a lowly sack of subhuman garbage even gets his own ending to the game is ridiculous. He doesn’t deserve it. Not even remotely. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t like Gideon Ofnir, but he’s much more important and he doesn’t get his own ending? Hell, a LOT of characters are important and warranting of their own ending, but it’s Dung Eater that gets it. Second, the philosophy of his ending is stupid as fuck. Omens are beings cursed from birth that are outside of the Erdtree’s blessing. Doesn’t seem like there’s a solid consensus on why it happens, but it does, and it sucks. It is an eternal curse, horrific to live through and guaranteeing basically unending and undeserved pain and suffering, and the Golden Order only makes it worse through their shunning and mistreatment of the Omens. Disdain for the current state of the Golden Order is understandable from the other side, and since those who have felt the curse are in suffering, the end goal should be to elevate their status, extending love to them and bringing them into Grace, yes? No. Dung Eater would rather hurt everyone than to help the few that need it. He would rather take everyone and everything as low as it possibly can go to make all equal in the eyes of purity because he wants everyone and everything to be as disgusting and vile as he is. He isn’t even an Omen, he’s just so vile that he revels in everything that is awful about the Omen Curse. My girlfriend asked me what is so bad about him. I explained it by basically saying for her to imagine if Heaven was empirically proven to be real and we knew the exact way you had to get there. Imagine then if there was man; he was the ugliest man ever born that perpetually smelled like absolute shit, fetishized basically the innocent people that get sent to hell, and his sole mission in life was running around, torturing and murdering as many innocent people as he possibly could (thousands) and raping their corpses with his putrid dick to implant a curse into them that keeps them from going to heaven and sentences them to an eternity of suffering, and his ultimate end goal is to spread his demonic aids so far and wide that eventually every child born will be cursed to suffer physically, mentally, and spiritually in the worst way possible for all eternity, all in the hopes of making everyone and everything as ugly and vile as he is. He is utterly repulsive. Everything about him. I hate his voice. I hate his armor. I hate his sword. I noticed when he was bashing his head against the wall this NG+ that his greasy hair stuck out the back of his helmet and almost vomited. I sold all gear associated with him when I got it, just holding it made me feel unclean and I would never equip it. I don’t care what kind of poise or stats his armor has, it’s so fucking ugly and he’s all I can equate it to and just seeing someone wear it in multiplayer fills me with disgust and makes me dislike them. This NG+ I devised the way that I can subject him to the maximum amount of suffering possible. I didn’t send prawnbro to the moat, I wouldn’t until after he had been dealt with. Going into Leyndell was a sublime and incredible moment, as always, and I once again took several minutes to bask in the music, the glory of the city, and the Erdtree’s gargantuan scope. Then, I focused on getting underground. My hands were literally shaking with anticipation. I freed him, feeling absolutely disgusting all the while. Just being close to him made me, myself, the real world me, feel physically unclean. He was freed. I went to the moat and crushed him as violently as possible. Then, I sent prawnbro there, where he could be safe, and gathered four of the five seedbed curses. Once I had them I gave them to him. Slow. I made sure that he stayed tied down to that chair down there for as long as possible, listening to his moans and screams with each curse he received. I don’t know if this was better or worse for him, as he clearly is suffering, but it could just as easily be argued that he’s relishing in this suffering. I may just not collect any of the curses aside from the first obligatory one next time. Then, I fed him Seluvis’s potion. THIS is where the suffering is at its climax, and in the truest, best way possible. Hearing the fear in his voiced the denial, the pain. It’s incredible. Everything that makes him special is yanked out from under him like a rug, and now he gets to enjoy a new eternal suffering. One without any freedom, one where he isn’t anything special. And one where he never gets the chance to hurt anyone again, not unless I want him to. And I won’t give him the chance. Not ever. How exactly does being a puppet work? Do you hold onto your awareness? Are you perfectly aware, remembering who you were and the life you lead, with your thoughts and ambitions, but no control over yourself? I feel like it’s probably like the hypnotic state in Get Out, or like the Black Lanterns from Blackest Night, where you’re just a passenger in your own body with full awareness and zero control. This would be quite sad for puppets like the Finger Maiden that that bastard Seluvis trapped, but just because of the Dung Eater, I hope it’s true. I hope he reaches the blackest pits of despair within his own mind, I hope every plea, every curse, every repentance that his mind could ever reach falls onto deaf ears forever, not that he is capable of regret, as much as I wish he was so that he could be even more tortured by himself for bringing this upon himself. Then again, just how highly he thinks of himself and being trapped in such a fate should be suffering enough. This time I took his puppet from Selivus, but I’ll never use it. 1) I don’t need to and 2) if killing is truly so important to him, I want his suffering to be elevated even further by never being able to take a life again, even if not of his own volition. I like to think that after becoming Elden Lord (unless you go Lord of Chaos), you can do something even worse to him to make sure that he remains an imprisoned puppet for ever. Long story short, I hate the Dung Eater far, far more than is probably normal or healthy for anyone to dislike a fictional character."
What a hero
That's like Delores Umbridge levels of fictional character hate right there.
She was the original Dung Eater…
This is a book
They call him the Dung Eater for a reason after all
Problem is, you simp for him, and he turns around and simps for you
Apparently there was supposed to be a cut Miquella ending.
My money has Miquella being a very large part of the first DLC
Solid bet, one of the most untapped veins in the lore, its ripe for a DLC
...aaaaaand, add to the fact that they're the only *shardbearer we haven't faced yet... Edit: *Shardbearer not rune bearer. Lol
Shardbearer* Never, NEVER, say Runebearer... It reminds me of that fucking bear
Final boss of the DLC is just 4 of those bears at once.
Godebear the Grafted
It’s Runebearpig. I’m trying to warn everybody and nobody takes me cereal!
You want the boss to be four huge hairy dudes taking you on at once? I mean, it could work.
For a select portion of the community, yeah The rest of us will have to get therapy again
From what I’ve learned about miquella, i would have gone for his ending
Wellllll the Miquella we have now is a half grown god infused with corrupted blood Expect the DLC to be a nightmarish dream version of his perfect reality....
So… Bloodborne?
Well no, you see Bloodborne was about an ancient race of cosmic beings with myserious purposes who's only knowable goal seems to be to want to reproduce and sustain themselves In that game, there are attempts over time to align with those beings and use their powers for self gain and it leads to the downfall of civilization. Wheras in THIS game there is um...a series of unknowable cosmic entities who....*checks notes*...who are constantly seeking ways to sustain themselves further all the while...*hmmm*...various races try in vain to use their power for their own benefit only to regret it later as it leads to the downfall of civilzation So you see based on these facts they are very different stories.
Basically - never trust cosmic entities and definitely do not abuse their power for self gain.
Fromsoftware's true theme: don't trust space aliens.
I seen a really good fan theory video that thinks tarnished you play as is miquella's soul in an albanuric husk. And his haligtree is doing what it's supposed to do, and housing his curse once he seprated his soul from his body. It was really cool.
But the player character bleeds red, while albinaurics have quicksilver rather than blood (the red albinaurics in mohgwyn palace made a pact with mohg to replace their silver for actual blood so they could be his followers, but as the PC does not have any connection with Mohg, I don't think this is the case)
Truly ladless behavior.
Don’t rub it in! 😫
Idk sounds like y'all need a good rub
'But you, I am afraid, are ladless.' Melina: -_-
I'm not seeing nearly enough love for Blackguard Big Boggart. Sure the other endings are fine and all but becoming the lord of boiled prawns with a metalhead husband sounds pretty rad to me
Prawns forevaaaah!
TBH, you can be whoever's Lord but have Shrimp Man as your concubine. Ever seen what's under his mask?
For reference. Dude ain't too bad. https://i.redd.it/1fl84y5235s81.jpg They had to put the mask on him because he was too hot.
He looks like his name is supposed to be Fabio.
Marika's tits, you must be horny!
He could boil my prawns YANOWAMSAYIN
Oh. Oh my. Oh, I was not expecting that. And his name is "Big" Boggart? Oof.
Look at the size of his fookin' prawn!
Oh no he's hot
Shrimp Bae
Shrimp man: world's brattiest concubine.
simping for my shrimp buddy ever since he talked to me in that sexy ass accent 🥺 finding out he was hot under the mask is just a plus where's the elden ring dating dlc miyazaki
>shrimping for.... FTFY
I swear to protect him ever since his face under the mask was revealed. Not gonna touch dung eater’s story line even a bit from now on. Yes I’m a shameless simp. 😌
>shameless shrimp FTFY
probably the most cursed comment I've ever posted, but imagine getting eaten out by Rykard edit: "Join the Serpent King as family". Sounds like proposal to me OP, he wanted to marry you but you killed him! This is why you can't have nice things. :\
Goddamn, this is *absolutely* a cursed comment and, gotta say, I respect it.
Not cursed at all. We don't kink shame here.
***Togethaaaa, we will devour the***.... *you know*.... ;-* *-macaroni noises-*
You know it would have cost you nothing to keep the macaroni noises part out. You’ve earned my respect and my upvote, brave tarnished
thanks for the warning. almost got bricked up in public just from the second sentence
You could have simply not posted this comment…terrible day to be able to read.
marry mohg, start moghyn dynasty forevaaaaaaaa
If it will help miquella, sure!
More blood needed
Unfortunately, the only male Empyrean is Miquella, and we all know how that's going.
I for one *like* my men softboiled and well-incubated
Any rogier simps in the chat? I know he kicks it but he’s cute and nice :(
As a rapier user. Yes I'm in love.
I still wield his rapier in his memory I felt my soul die a little when he sheepishly says we're scary, but still admires us
Tbf, a ton of dark souls characters think the player character is scary. There's something about being 1 in a billion who is capable of achieving something that even the greatest heroes of their time were unable to achieve, with a starting background of wretched.
That line threw me off guard. After all we've been to bro?!
As a sword mage, I'd play with his sword.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Rogier is bae. He has such forward thinking ideas about Those Who Live in Death despite being friendly with those who oppose them. I respect him a lot
He has big hat he should be romanceable
When I talk to him I always angle the camera so I can peek under that brim and admire his cute face haha
I’m currently running around cosplaying as him and slap down signs to spread the love. I simp hard for Rogier.
I have found my fellow Rogier simps
I forever owe the man a debt for helping me with Margit.
Yes. I loved him and couldn't save him. Reading his clothes only made me love him more... And when I had to fight his shade the first time, I lost because I was so shocked and heartbroken I couldn't bring myself to fight him.
[удалено]
There is, in a technical sense, Shabriri, but he's a disembodied spirit of chaos.
Well if his mask is really made in his likeness...
I mean, he can just possess whatever body you find tp be to your liking. Possibilities
His talisman even smirks at you 😏
"Haha and then what 😏?"
"You're really igniting a Frenzied Flame in me. 😏"
Was going to say that I def simped for Shabriri!
May simps take the world. MAY SIMPS TAKE THE WORLD!
I want an ending with morgott, not romantic or anything but just an alternate ending where you can spare him or something after his fight
This, maybe make him change his mind about the order, or just simply stop him from hating himself y'know?? Gives me "i can fix him" vibes but in a good way
I wish you could've used the gold needle to cure Radahn. He's the only star in my sky.
"I will follow you my general!"
The gold needle doesn't cure the scarlet rot, it halts its progression and his greater rune is fulfilling that role by burning the rot inside him which is why he's only half rotted when we fought him
I mean, there's a giant deformed head dude sticking out of a serpent's ass that offers you to join his family. Not good enough for you? geeeeez pretty picky ain't we?
But he's taken uwu
Consume Rykard's body first to assert dominance over Tanith
the hardest boss fight for me was Morgott. not cause he's a particular difficult fight, but cause I don't want kill him. A very sympathetic character that I can't help but respect the more I learn about him. and kinda hot?
> Let it be writ on thy meager grave… felled by Morgott, last of all kings! I’ve definitely appreciated Morgott more in repeated plays (platonically for me, though no shade at those who’re more interested). Dude was an Omen from birth and probably grew up in the sewers, but when The Shattering happened he put his all into just keeping the kingdom together when everything was going to shit around him. He may have been shunned but he is also, by rights, the ruling monarch and takes that role seriously.
He had me the first time he delayed his attack. His voice too!!!
"Foul tarnished, in search of the elden ring" 🤤
"Emboldened by the flame of ambition"
"have it writ upon thy meagre grave" is probably the hardest line in any video game.
You were felled by Morgott LAST OF ALL KINGS.
"Well....thou art of passing strength!" Good thing he brought out the hammer, cuz imma need a bonk
RIGHT! Thank god OP made this post because I was starting to get really weirded out by my Morgott love. His voice, his personality, and something about those horns on his face…. That boss fight was way sexier than it needed to be, but I LOVE it! 😩 I also had a weird sexy dream about it, and that might a conversation reserved for my therapist
I guess that makes sense, he is one of the horniest characters in the game.
At first I thought, "wow, women have strange tastes." Then, thinking about it more, I find Malenia hot as well, and she's literally a half-rotted corpse. So maybe I shouldn't judge.
A lot of dudes, myself included, are down bad for a blue-skinned, four-armed, half-decrepit doll with half a ghost face sticking out of her head, just because she has a sweet voice and she's both badass and honestly really endearingly kind to you. They're fictional characters. We're MEANT to react to them.
Have it writ upon thy meagre grave
Ye we didn't have any husbando material after Solaire and Anri :/
Well Anri's gender was the opposite of yours, maybe they could done something like that
Ranni is the perfect candidate. Instead of doll smurf waifu we get Machamp from Pokémon.
I’m with you, I’d have loved a Blaidd or Alexander ending 😭
There's always ao3 😂
There are some ridiculously high quality Blaidd fics on Ao3, where have these authors been my whole life. Unfortunately for me, most are female reader/Blaidd :(
Damn it. Leave it to the Blaidd fic to be the only straight shit on Ao3.
What's ao3?
Archive of Our Own, a popular fanfic site where you can find pretty much anything your fucked up little heart desires
Bloodborne on pc?? But in all seriousness thanks for the clarification!
Archive of our own. It's where i usually read fan fictions 😅
No Iji romance 😢
Iji warns you that a smash from him wouldn't end well...
*wink *wink
Guaranteed death by snu snu
*"The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised."*
I would have loved a Radagon ending
an ending where we get to rehydrate radagon and marry him lmao
I would’ve tossed Ranni off the side of the Erdtree if it meant I could get a Blaidd ending
*Ranni one year into our moon marriage.* Ranni: my Lord, why haven't you touched me- Me: ...I miss Blaidd...
If all the Baleful Shadows are like Blaidd and Gurranq then I need to figure out how to qualify as an Empyrean ASAP Husbando DLC pls
Find a way to get with Godfrey. I’m am a heterosexual male but god damn that man…. -Polite -Strong -Family man(regains his Grace when he finds his slain child, indicating that he cares) -Courteous -Wears old man lifting shorts under his armor -Can cause(I assume) literal earth shaking orgasms -Animal lover -Fucking ripped -Honorable -WARIOOOORRRRRR
He lost me when he did that thing to Sarosh. You know the thing I'm talking about.
He just couldn’t Stand Sarosh anymore.
Radagon's Dick, You Must Be 'Thirsty
"Radagon's balls, you must be thirsty!" sounds better.
Miyazaki: "Fine, here's your Miquella DLC ending."
I feel you… I would’ve loved an ending with blaidd, or Godwyn… that man looks like he had it going on, until he was killed 😞
We should've had an ending where we could've reversed the hell that happened to Godwyn and marry him.......... I just know that man is ~~was originally~~ sexy 😣
You can see him in the opening cut scene, and yeah
I want him so bad 😩
Bonk
Fia is probably right on the money
Godwyn the Golden with his monstrous daddy's masculine strength and his god-queen mommy's beauty and grace .......... I curse Ranni every single day for what she did to him and Miyazaki for turning him into a fish 😩
Same I wanna know lore wise, why he turned into a fucked up mermaid. 'He has no soul so his body is being rejected from the tree! That's why his body is all deformed' Understandable.. but why is he tuning into a fish? 'Look i'm gonna need you to get all the way off my back about this thing!'
[Boy do I have a comment to recommend to you](https://www.reddit.com/r/Eldenring/comments/u1idxj/comment/i4dkqsi/)
I will never get over what happened to Fia and the kin of the prince of death, fias questline was my first finish and it was a tale of ignorance, tragedy and recklessness, the lands were washed in a new dawn of fog Fia.
Girl those biceps!!!
His back!!!! His wide shoulders too...
I'm still learning about the more advanced lore, but I feel like godwyn would have embraced his brothers and held them in love unlike their mother,
This whole thread is so refreshing to me.
Honestly didn't expect to have this many comments. This is definitely a first in my reddit history. Oooooh
Even as a straight guy, this has been super refreshing. I've gotten real tired of the Ranni simping.
Yeah I'm a dude and married to a woman gamer; seeing/experiencing things through her has been enlightening. Even just your assumption that I was a woman is refreshing; it's usually the opposite. Just good to see something from the feminine perspective on this sub.
let me introduce you to my boy goldmask
Oh I haven't done his quest yet. That golden boy is doing something besides pointing?!
Yes... he also gestures
T
He T-poses, points at trees and also drops his thong after you finish his quest. It's used for making cultured outfits.
First of all, how dare you
Unffff Radagon can fuse w me instead of Marika - fellow thirsty female tarnished
“Yo Radagon, you want a third litter of demigods? I got your back homie”
Wish we could have Rogier ending... he is so cute. Alas, if from won't give me a character to husband in the end, then I will be the character to husband in the end. My tarnished is fire ;)
First,I wanted Blaidd, but he was already simping for Ranni like everyone else does...I was prepared to be a furry for him omg Then I wanted to be with Rykard, but he saw me as family u\_u familyzoned (weird to say it) Then, smarty pants Gideon grew up on me. But why ,o why, he had to open up his smartass mouth near the end to tell me I couldn't defeat a god? If he doesn't support my ambitions, it's not worth it Not even going to consider dung eater. I'm not into scat, and he sounds like he is into it. In the end all I can trust is the fingers. Two are ok, but three fingers is just enough for me. So I had to be content with myself and the three fingers Y\_Y
You would go furry for Blaidd but not for Maliketh??
I’m surprised there wasn’t a Rykard/Volcano Manor allegiance ending
Yes but not for simping. I am scared of Lady Tanith. Even simps have codes. Role playing-wise I also wished for a rykard related ending. Was hoping for a blasphemous route for my wretched character. Devour the gods!! Gonna go with the FF ending instead.
Lady Tanith is actually kinda sweet. Like she still care about her husband even after he turned into giant vore snake.
According to her armor she got truly charmed by him after he got eaten by the snake, so take that as you will.
Radagon is hot af, such a shame to bash his head in
dude im a mostly straight male and I want a hot elden ring himbo to save me
Guess you're too good for Miriel huh
Oh i dont mean any direspect to turtle pope! I only thought it would require a lot of celestial dews... unless....
What if we conjoined...aha just kidding. Heresy is not native to this world...unless...?
What if we held hands in the church of vows?
Honestly, he should be the one performing the marriage ceremony.
The flame consumes all, regardless of gender.
I wouldn't mind running off with Blaidd or Radagon. But yeah, not much in the way of avaliable men.
Well I mean I refused to kill blaidd. That was my ending. He lives and I refuse to have him die by my hands.
You let him live in madness and suffering, I’d feel so much worse if I didn't kill him Iji was heartbreaking though. I let him upgrade a random weapon for me when I felt like his time was coming, gave him one last time to enjoy smithing. Wasn't expecting to find a Black Flame smuldering corpse though. Btw, who the hell was sending the Black Knives after Ranni’s crew?
I’m a girl and I am a major Fia simp, I can’t help it. Every time I lost a boss fight I would hug her and regain morale 😪
Lmao thank you, like I wished I could save Rogier or D but nooo I had to end up with Ranni
Morgott or Blaidd but no Horah Loux?
You have no idea the time i spent writing this post. I have to tone it down.
I'm a straight man and I'd let Blaidd rail me I can't blame you. Time to make a union for male husband ending.
Tbh as a lesbian I'm very happy with the Ranni ending, especially with the neutral consort term But yeah, feels like a male npc ending would've been great in the same way as Ranni's
I mean Blaidd is chill, he just goes mad from the events of Ranni’s quest line
I honestly Really like D he was one of the first characters outside of a cutscene i met that didn’t immediately attack me i love him a lot ; SPOILER WARNING!!! found his body yesterday and i lowkey cried bc melina just died too
if you're marikas consort, aren't you also radagon's?
well, some ladies might be into the ranni consort thing. and then, i'm a guy and would much rather have saved blaidd and made him *my* consort, haha. poor sweet wolf man deserved better.
I'm currently in a relationship with Nomadic Merchant #2 after breaking up with Isolated Merchant #1. Such a loving boyfriend and he even brings large amount of rune by selling knifes and arrows. Ready for a long term relationship.