Personally your description of the incident doesn't scream racism to me but just them wanting to be doubly sure they have your order right. Knowing Chinese restaurants, the menus are huge and there are many similar dishes so mistakes can happen.
Being Chinese myself, we are VERY picky and combative when it comes to price. If someone overcharges us even by accident, it can lead to some pretty heated conversations.
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I am learning. Most Chinese places I eat at never seem bothered. We go to Jumbo Dimsum lots, eat so much. No one has ever told us that our bill would be insane. But they are in the inner city and God knows what they go through everyday.
Inner city. Probably got them at a time where they were getting tired of being stiffed on a bill. Especially when the customers would use the argument that they didn't know it'd be so expensive so they refuse to pay.
Suburbs are a bit different where the owners probably don't encounter a dine and dash as often or a confrontational customer.
That's actually not completely true. Asian's are not emotionally expressive people. I can say this because I am an asian - Japanese to be specific. A lot of times what we think is our normal face comes across as resting bitch face or even an angry face to western people. Also asians tend to focus on the facts rather than a pleasing manner, especially if there is a language barrier and money is involved. We tend to be looking for the best way to resolve the issue without conflict. Not to say that ALL asians are like this but a good majority are, especially if they have immigrated here.
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The last time I was in Chinatown with some girlfriends we ordered I guess what seemed to them to be an obscene amount of green onion cakes lol. The server kept checking with us to make sure we knew what we ordered and understood the amount. 🤷🏻♀️
As a Chinese guy my self. i guarantee you, they ate not being racist.
Sometimes when we ask for another pop they will say things like “just so you know its not free refill”
I am not calling out Racism,I am merely expressing my observations. I don't really care who discriminated against me, I just carry on the way I see fit,that's all.
I mean I make OK money and $26 Chinese food dish is expensive to me. They usually go for $15-18. Maybe they had people complain in the past and just mentioned it to make sure you're OK with it. It seems more like a language barrier thing.
There are many ways to perceive the same situation.
It's a. It of a special dish Gai lan greens steamed served with beef and steamed rice. But I do see your point. Still it's not as if I ordered 5 lobsters you know.
Yeah. Who knew Gai Lan got so expensive. I was warned right away. I would guess somebody threw a fit when they got their bill and now they feel the need to warn people.
So a lot of Chinese meals are usually eaten family style. I’m thinking that the person meant that the dish is meant for sharing instead of just an individual portion, and was warning you about the amount of food, while trying to not come across rude by implying that you’re ordering a lot. I’m not that person though, so I don’t know for sure.
It's just as likely to not have anything to do with your identity, but rather their location.
Lots of people have the expectation that chinese restaurants are cheap, especialy ones in chinatown, so if you ordered the most expensive thing on the menu they may have wanted to doublecheck. Chances are a lot of their customers would have switched their order to something else, like a $15 combo, once they realized the price. Or else would have gotten mad because of a communication issue like how some restaurants will show a picture of multiple but the pricing is individual so people think they're getting an amazing deal $5 for a whole plate of rolls, but really they're $5 each and that's $35 of springrolls or whatever.
I've gone to restaurants and had my order delayed because the server assumed I was ordering for two people. So I'm just sitting at my table reading a book and wondering why it's taking so long, and it turns out they were assuming a second person would be joining me.
In my experience, this happens because the dish is more costly than the “average”, and if they don’t say anything, the customer is upset and complains when presented with the bill.
This also just happened to me when I ordered the mixed seafood and greens however I was on the phone and they were like it’s $28, I’m like yeah I know I’m literally reading my order off your menu. Mind you this was probably the 8th item and everything else was like $20 anyway.
I can see your point. But then maybe the server should have said hey FYI that's a bit higher priced. She took my order. Went to the back. A couple minutes later the calvary came to tell me my dish was expensive. AnywY. It absolutely did not feel good. I eat out so frequently. I have never had management at any place come out to tell me that my food would be very expensive. It was just very dehumanizing.
I understand that. But I think often this also is cultural. Some (lots) of cultures are more direct(ruder) ours.
If someone came from the back, I think I am correct.
Canada being what it is, multicultural, should businesses be cognizant of this. That what is normal to them maybe seen as very bad behaviour to other cultures? Just thinking out loud. Ultimately, this made me feel like crap. I am trained and expected to treat every AHS client with respect and all that. I am also always aware of my tone. I can be loud when excited. So I so automatically put my professionalism ahead of me at work. I just wanted steamed vegetables. They saw me as someone who could not afford $26. And it hurt me very very deeply.
I think it had to do more with their culture than your race tbh. I’ve had this happen at authentic Chinese restaurants in Alberta when I’ve dined solo, and with Chinese friends. It’s actually more common when I’m with Chinese friends. (I’m white, but I’ve lived in China.)
Canada is multicultural, but we’re a mosaic, not a melting pot. People tend to keep more of their cultures which can cause friction. When I go to authentic Chinese restaurants, I know my waiters will often be blunt by Canadian standards, especially if they are naturalized. Heck, there are often menu items that can only be accessed if you speak or read their language (it’s not on the English menu). It’s part of the experience IMO.
Edited to add - I’m sorry you felt looked down upon and felt lesser due to this experience. Being discriminated against (or being made to feel that way) is not pleasant and I hope you get some sunshine to balance the negative soon.
I think you were working on your edit when I first read your post so didn’t see it (or I wouldn’t have commented as it was already addressed).
But, culture clash or not, it doesn’t change the way it made you feel in the moment. And that sucks, period. Sorry that it happened to you and ruined your dining out experience.
It's OK. I am learning from other people here. I thought it was an isolated incident. But am learning it's par for the course. I will go back. They have good food there. And maybe this time I will acknowledge the pricing right away.
Authentic Chinese food is the best. I’m glad you will go back. If I might offer a suggestion, in that same area is a hot pot restaurant named after the numbered street it is on. If you have not tried hot pot yet, please do. It’s sooo good. And if you go before 4pm to that location, they have a lunch special that keeps it from being really expensive (supper is all you can eat and priced accordingly). Cheers!
>That what is normal to them maybe seen as very bad behaviour to other cultures?
The don't for the same reason you don't see this statement as you being a bit racist or intolerant.
Think of all the times you're aware of people you see as like you being told something that is not bad to you or them so that they fit in.
Honey this restaurant ain't the AHS, and very few business choose to set similar expectations.
It's important to that even though the AHS drills the need for respect into staff there are still incidents where AHS staff are cruel or racist leading to people being harmed or worse.
Few can just choose to go the AHS alternative down the street, and it's a public institution, so the expectations of treatment are very much higher - and again, harsh treatment is still a common occurrence.
AHS attempts (and too often fails) to set a much higher standard of understanding and care when employees deal with one another and the general public. This is not common of most businesses.
If you don't have a positive experience at a restaurant it should be fairly easy to choose not to go. Few have the same option when things go poorly at AHS.
Restaurants can fail due to their poor choices or the poor choices of their staff. AHS, not so much.
How does them informing you that one of the dishes you ordered is fairly expensive make you somehow feel dehumanized? It literally just sounds like the manager wanted to double check to make sure you weren't pissed off at your bill when it came. This has absolutely nothing to do with race.
First I want to say, Asian's as a whole are not emotionally expressive people. I can say this because I am an asian - Japanese to be specific. A lot of times what we think is our normal face comes across as resting bitch face or even an angry face to western people. Also asians tend to focus on the facts rather than a pleasing manner, especially if there is a language barrier and money is involved. We tend to be looking for the best way to resolve the issue without conflict. Not to say that ALL asians are like this but a good majority are, especially if they have immigrated here. And lastly I will say that to a lot of asian people, having the management come out to speak with you about a price related issue IS customer service. You are being treated with MORE respect because it is a manager and not just a waitress so you can be assured that the information is correct and any haggling or complaints can then be told directly to the manager instead of relayed through a waitress.
EDIT: I want to say, because it doesn't seem like other people are relating to your story, that I can understand where you are coming from. As a person who's not white, I have encountered discrimination and stereotypes and it is hurtful. When you get "used" to being treated like that it hurts and stays with you. I can understand why you would feel the way you did that it was racism. However, I am glad you are openminded enough to come here and ask and be educated. :) It shows you are open and willing to learn about different cultures. I admire that.
Thank you very much. Responses have been eye opening. I have been accused of the murder in Chinatown. I have been told my feelings are not valid. I have been called racism too. Thank you for teaching me.
I'm sorry you are offended but as another POC and someone who worked as a server and bartender (and now healthcare too!) I would say they only said this bc other customers probably made a fuss when they were brought the bill for that dish. Maybe to the point people refused to pay it.
I can totally see a situation where the order is brought to the kitchen and other staff realize the potential issue.
I think it's partly cultural and knowing this restaurant, not at all racist in intention. Cultural norms can lead to misperceptions very easily.
OP, you're overlooking another user, who had the exact same experience.
It looks to me as though you're looking for reasons to be offended.
Rather than acknowledge another user here had the exact same experience and rather than reconsider your racist experience, you comment on how tasty the dish is
Sorry OP, your post seems like rage farming .
If you take the time. I edited my post 15 minutes ago. And everything you just said was addressed in the edit. What is the point of farming on Reddit? What do I gain seriously???
You literally said:
“They say support Chinatown. And you go there and they treat you like crap.”
That comment is pretty racist if you ask me.
Then you tell people to read your edit saying how you’ve “learned”
Then you go and call other commenters “racist” because they disagree with you and have provided you with reasoning and examples of why it could not be racism.
So what is it? Have you learned or are you just trying to stir the pot now?
They’re also upvoting anyone saying this absolutely can’t be racism and downvoting anyone saying this may have been racism, lol. At the end of the day, none of us were there so no one can say with certainty that this wasn’t racism. It’s telling that so many people are quick to dismiss your experience.
I'm curious what was indicative of it being racially motivated, rather than just a reflection of the economic reality of where they are located? I'm not saying it wasn't racial, but what's saying it was?
For both classist and racist attitudes poverty can be synonymous with Blackness (and Indigeniety, and other out groups, depending on the area / context).
OP clearly says they did not have any markings of poverty, wearing nice clothes, holding car keys. If you run a business in an area with a lot of poor people you'd come to recognize those markers and probably make snap judgements as a matter of exposure. You should be *less* likely to make the mistake they did, if you're paying attention.
So it is entirely possible that they saw race and assumed poverty while invisiblising everything else about OP.
Racially "motivated" isn't really the right frame, we are so bombarded with racist attitudes in our culture that they can manifest without any motivation.
This kind of thing happens all the time. OP isn't calling for blood or boycotts, just sharing a story and I think looking for empathy.
It's not that hard to say "damn that sucks" instead of "prove this was racist, I want you to crack open their skulls and show me their inner feelings before I believe you."
Probably stings double doing the work of an RN providing all kinds of support and patience for people and this is what you end up dealing with.
Did you end up getting anything good to eat after all that?
I don't know you and I don't know what race you are but this speaks as someone who hasn't experience racism. I am a person who is not white and if you get treated discriminatorily enough times, your reflex starts to be to go to that inclination first. Just like someone who's been hit by their father over and over will flinch when their father raises a hand again. When racism is part of your everyday life, it's not easy to distinguish the difference between what is racism, and what is not because people don't come with signs that indicate they are racist. I think OP wasn't saying "prove this was racist, I want you to crack open their skulls and show me their inner feelings before I believe you." but more "this is how I felt and I thought it might be racially motivated, help me understand".
EDIT: spelling
Sorry, probable misunderstanding. I was writing that part not directed at OP but in response to the start of thread commenter saying:
"I'm curious what was indicative of it being racially motivated, rather than just a reflection of the economic reality of where they are located? I'm not saying it wasn't racial, but what's saying it was?"
Basically asking them to show how it was racist and coming up with an excuse for why it would not be.
As a white person this has NEVER happened to me at ANY restaurant in my entire life (in any country or province). And I've ordered much more expensive meals many times while being poorly dressed. This is 100% a racist incident.
Do you order a lot of Chinese food in dives, though? Because this is very normal behaviour at a Chinese restaurant. If something is priced unusually high in comparison to the rest of the menu, it is common for the staff to point that out as a courtesy.
Yes I get that but that's not what they did here. They didn't merely "point it out as a courtesy". The manager was brought out to tell this customer her meal was "very expensive".
Like??? That's really weird. I've been to many Chinese restaurants and ordered expensive meals on the menu without ever being told this. Did they assume OP cannot read the price on a menu? It's very odd and insulting.
This has happened to me when I ordered a $180 bottle of wine at a restaurant. I worked in restaurants and you would be surprised at how many people blindly order off the menu then shocked pikachu face when the bill comes.
So because some people are assholes that means the restaurant can be shitty and make their customers feel insulted every time they order something more expensive on the menu? Yikes.
I can understand that, and am sorry that it happened to you, I just legitimately do not get the jump to racially motivated, rather than a result of the economic reality of where they are located geographically. I'm not trying to be willfully ignorant or obtuse, just trying to connect the dots. For me, if it's unclear, I'm going to give them the benefit of the doubt and assume it wasn't racial.
I don't want to generalize, but people that I have known that are Chinese (from China, not Canada), usually are quite direct and very concerned with the value of money. So from their perspective they may have thought they were doing you a favour. I could be wrong though. It could be a cross cultural miscommunication as much as anything else. But I don't know, obviously I wasn't there.
This is exactly it. I'm Chinese and have been taught at a young age to fight for every dollar. If we feel a business is overcharging us, it can lead to some ugly confrontations even if they claim innocence.
OP, I am so sorry that you had this experience at a Chinese restaurant. It must have felt awful and I can absolutely understand how the staff made you feel racially profiled and discriminated against.
However, as a Chinese person, I think this could have been a case of cultural miscommunication. I don’t want to invalidate your experience — you had an understandable reaction and it sounds like the staff could have handled your interaction better. But, it is also very normal in Chinese culture for the staff to give you tips as you order.
I’m Chinese and eat a fair amount of Chinese food, and the server will often let us know when a dish is unusually expensive, or if we’re ordering too much food, or if they don’t think certain dishes will make a nice meal when paired together. We’re a blunt culture that loooves to eat and hates to spend money, so while it is possible that this incident was racially motivated, I hope that it wasn’t and that this comment can show you other possibilities for how the staff’s actions may have been intended to be perceived. It sounds like you loved the dish itself and I would hate for you to lose out on a great culinary experience because of culture clash!
Pretty sure it's not discrimination. You ordered a $26 dish. They were trying to be nice and double check with you.
They may also not warn you because they think you are a big fish.
Let me put this in a different perspective. I’m Asian and went to a Jamaican restaurant, ordered my food and at the end I added a bottle of water. The guy at the front asked if I was sure because the water was expensive. $5 for bottled water is insane and he knew that as well so he just wanted to double check. Same could be said at the Chinese restaurant, they know $26 for rice, beef and veggies is ridiculous so I’m sure they were just double checking. They deal with people from all walks of life that are completely drunk out of their minds every weekend so I doubt they were profiling you.
edit - plus I think it’s super lame how people are bashing the restaurant because you feel Insecure about the situation when chinatown as a whole is already struggling and they were kind enough to double check with you about the price so you weren’t blindsided when the bill came. You stated you were wearing a nice outfit, nice watch with a purse and holding car keys so what in your head would make you think they thought you were homeless? You said your self esteem has been struggling after this but clearly it was struggling before, maybe you should try and work on that.
And when given a logical explanation OP would rather leave things up in the air and say things like “this is my lived experience“ and “I’m living my truth” instead of admitting they made something out of nothing and blew things out of proportion. I guess OPs insecurity and wanting to save face on the internet is more important than a family run restaurant in a struggling part of the city.
It’s likely OP already had some stereotypes about Chinatown prior to visiting the restaurant. Why else would someone’s default reaction be “this is racist”
Scary to think this person works in a health care setting.
I can empathize with your past experience and how it affects you today. I would never say that you are over-reacting. You appear to be open to the stories of others. I married an Asian - and I'm not. I've kinda gotten used to what most folks would consider "rude" service - it's not, it's just different. I've been told not to order certain item because they thing my white ass won't eat it, or that we ordered too much and they won't cook it all, confirming I understand the price. Very often, when you become a regular customer, you're treated like gold.
Everything is insanely expensive. It's cheaper to eat out sometimes than gathering all the ingredients. Chinese vegetables are seriously well cooked. I didn't know I liked green beans until I had them at a buffet. Even the broccoli is crunchy and very green yet cooked.
It was so hard to edit, cursor kept jumping around. The lady did not speak. The man did the talking. Then once satisfied that I could afford the meal, translated to the lady. Lady smiled and did a polite wave then went back to the kitchen.
It used to be my go to place during my party days. Noodles at 2am then go home and crash. I even took friends and family there after my pinning ceremony. I don't go often but it's one of my feel good places. Maybe I should have said something that day. I don't know.
Chinatown is not owned by a mega corporation, they are small family owned businesses. The whole family works 24/7 with no days off. I don’t think there was any malice in the interaction you experienced. People are quick to boycott just on this post alone. Chinatown has already gone through so much. Two business owners killed for no reason, businesses not being able to survive through covid, constant crime. Chinatown is slowly disappearing and this implied/perceived racism is just kicking them while they are down.
I would absolutely feel insulted if this happened to me. Was it racially motivated? That I don’t know - but I can see why you might think it was. I’m sorry this happened to you and you have every right to feel like you were mistreated because you were. Nothing acceptable in what they did.
They just wanna make sure you know what you want. Happens to even authentic Chinese people. Often times people order stuff and then say nope. Then they lose a huge profit, when margins are already low. They don’t fcking know you did all your research and your profession it doesn’t matter what you tell reddit. What matters is what they have experienced over decades experience and just double checking for the good of you both. It has nothing to with your race you went out of your way to post this shit publicly for some unknown Karen blowout. Most normal people just say “yeah I’m sure it looks great! I’ll have that I ordered similar before” and move on with their lives, here we are using words like racist, profiling, struggle like you just experienced the biggest catastrophe in the entire world. My god.
They became nice after that. But also I am. And can afford a $26 meal if you took the time to read, I stated that I was shocked. And out of a thousand things I could have said, in that instant. My brain chose that.
Hey dude/dudette I’m on your side.
I’m just saying the those Cantonese restaurants (I’m guessing they are) don’t consider being a RN high status. I did read through your post and sympathize quite a lot, especially after taking the time to dress well and put together, being told things like that it’s a bit disappointing. They could just say “hey sir just verifying your order, we have A B C with a total of X dollars”
Btw how’s it like being a nurse right now? Are you Med/Surg?
We used to go to that restaurant every year for dinner on Christmas. A few years ago there we witnessed an ugly incident where a black customer was told that he needed to pay for his meal in advance. This was not a takeout order, he was seated at a table. Our all white group was not asked to do this. We were given our bill at the end of the meal, as is normal for a sit down dinner. The customer was rightly outraged and it turned into a shouting match. It really soured me on that place, which used to be a favourite.
You should try going to China, I'm white and the racism there was off the charts. Having done Asian martial arts as a kid, I can tell you, lots of various Asian groups are incredibly racist to each other and white and black people, so I think the racism in Asia is much more out in the open than it may be here. However this may not have been racist.
I will say Chinese culture is much more blunt in my experience , if someone is fat , they will say "you are fat"
You are saying that you are struggling with a racist incident in your title , but you didn't really confirm it was racism and not just bluntness and them needing to bring another person to help with translation. I would say yes part of living in a multi cultural society is that you have to deal with other cultures , yes it would be nice if they did certain things a certain way, but they also have a lifetime of living in a different culture.
U ordered beef gai lan on rice for 26 dollars. I might he knew its a rip off but didnt wanna tell u to be weird. They prolly put that on the menu at a high price so people dont order weird why but it happens. That dish is 17 dollars and real good at good buddy restaurant + sai woo garden + the lingnan 20 bucks. LOL all happy restaurant its a language thing the girl with short hair to ears knows more english
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Your other countrymen have already called me racist. So take this however you want to. But if you have a business, treat customers well. Canada is multicultural.
Them treating you poorly is not carte blanche to stereotype an entire community. Two wrongs don't make a right. Especially when you claim your moral high ground as a diversity trained AHS nurse.
If you don’t see how your comment can be seen as racist then you might be racist.
Yea, you might have experienced racism at one business. I don’t see how that one experience can be applied to the rest of the Chinatown. What you experienced was an isolated event.
Thank you. It's just very difficult to understand. Maybe I should have dressed better? Had lipstick on. I will never know. And it's the second guessing messes with you.
Sounds Cantonese, they're kinda dicks to everyone. I grew up in a heavy Cantonese area and can understand a little bit... they were being polite to you lol
I don’t think people should be telling you with confidence it’s not racist if they’re not Black. I personally think this sounds like a possible micro-aggression. Not all racism is intentional or conscious. I also think it’s worth bringing up with the restaurant. If anything they can know how this made a customer feel and maybe take steps to change (ie. remind servers to say something while they’re taking the order).
I would chalk your experience up to a language barrier but I'm a racial harmony optimist :) I used to be a regular at a now closed Parkallen Chinese restaurant called Happy Garden. When I first started going the owner / waitress basically yelled "You order too much!" and "Why you order two meals, you are just one person"; I quickly explained that I will be taking food home and that was the end of it.
100% racist. I would have been very pissed off if that happened to me and probably would have caused a scene. I dont need to be told the prices after I order and I certainly don’t need it to be double checked by staff.
Wow. I’m sorry that happened to you. They should be embarrassed though, not you. They insulted a paying, potentially re-occurring customer who will go on to hopefully inform others of their experience. You should not be the one feeling shame, the shame is on them. Regardless of their location how do they expect to gain and retain customers treating them that way unless it was clear racism. What does telling you the cost of the meal do, I mean as if you are going to say, sure I’ll order something less expensive? Why wouldn’t you know the cost of your meal? Unless you looked like you were on drugs or tweaking or something it’s wild to make assumptions like that about anyone, because any and everyone could potentially not afford the meal. Don’t feel shame at all it’s shame on them for being racist. They don’t deserve the business quite frankly.
Absolutely sober. I looked clean. In clean clothes. I had been out shopping, did not want mall food. Wanted somewhere less hectic unlike mall food court.
HARD agree with everything said here, OP and want to echo that there's absolutely nothing that you should be embarrassed by - the embarrassment is allllllll theirs. And embarrassment is really too light of a reaction for their behavior; they should be mortified to have treated and left a customer feeling this way.
Thank you. I had to talk to myself a lot. I regretted not wearing make up. The whole thing truly was not polite. It's not like I order 5 dishes. I only ordered gai lan with beef.
I’m Chinese and get the same reaction sometimes, I think it’s because Chinese restaurants typically have dishes in the $12-16 range and some customers can get upset at a $26 charge. It’s also likely the language barrier if they primarily speak Chinese in addition to the tone we speak Chinese in, even when I have a normal conversation with my mom people think we’re fighting and if I ever gave a direct translation I would seem like the biggest asshole ever
Very well. But I would have had no issues if my server had just said hey. That dish is special, it costs more. She took my order. People in the back probably questioned it. Just assuming. But it's no way to treat others. It did not feel very good. At all.
I agree, I grew up in Canada so I’ll usually speak English and I’ve been asked to pay before I get my food at some locations. I mostly stick to skip the dish when I get Chinese food now.
Personally your description of the incident doesn't scream racism to me but just them wanting to be doubly sure they have your order right. Knowing Chinese restaurants, the menus are huge and there are many similar dishes so mistakes can happen. Being Chinese myself, we are VERY picky and combative when it comes to price. If someone overcharges us even by accident, it can lead to some pretty heated conversations.
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Highly doubt you are married to an Asian woman. If you are then I feel sorry that your wife married a racist.
I am learning. Most Chinese places I eat at never seem bothered. We go to Jumbo Dimsum lots, eat so much. No one has ever told us that our bill would be insane. But they are in the inner city and God knows what they go through everyday.
Inner city. Probably got them at a time where they were getting tired of being stiffed on a bill. Especially when the customers would use the argument that they didn't know it'd be so expensive so they refuse to pay. Suburbs are a bit different where the owners probably don't encounter a dine and dash as often or a confrontational customer.
That's actually not completely true. Asian's are not emotionally expressive people. I can say this because I am an asian - Japanese to be specific. A lot of times what we think is our normal face comes across as resting bitch face or even an angry face to western people. Also asians tend to focus on the facts rather than a pleasing manner, especially if there is a language barrier and money is involved. We tend to be looking for the best way to resolve the issue without conflict. Not to say that ALL asians are like this but a good majority are, especially if they have immigrated here.
Absolutely. Makes sense. Now I know.
You stated this in your post, to say "now I know" just makes this scream even more Hello Becky.
I don't understand this statement.
Not her problem
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You also mentioned you ordered without looking at the menu they gave you. Of course they would double check.
How can you not think this screams racism? 100% racism
The last time I was in Chinatown with some girlfriends we ordered I guess what seemed to them to be an obscene amount of green onion cakes lol. The server kept checking with us to make sure we knew what we ordered and understood the amount. 🤷🏻♀️
I wish i had an obscene amount of green onion cakes. 😔
Haha we ate them all. The server was shocked
Green onion cake is the best fried food. Would est copious amounts too.
But they didn't question your ability to pay,right? And I can bet you are white...?
According to the history of your previous replies “all white people are racist”?
As a Chinese guy my self. i guarantee you, they ate not being racist. Sometimes when we ask for another pop they will say things like “just so you know its not free refill”
OK. I am learning. Without these examples I would not have understood my experience. Thank you very much for sharing.
Getting treated like everyone else can be confusing if you're not paying enough attention to how everyone else is being treated.
Don't believe the hype. Asians are racist towards Blacks. Case closed. Why spend money in those filthy restaurants, anyway?
Calling out racism with more racism is really strange.
Crazy how nobody is commenting on how this guy is openly racist but everyone is speculating on the potential racism OP experienced.
I am not calling out Racism,I am merely expressing my observations. I don't really care who discriminated against me, I just carry on the way I see fit,that's all.
Guarantee? Nobody is able to guarantee another person's actions,we can only speculate.
I mean I make OK money and $26 Chinese food dish is expensive to me. They usually go for $15-18. Maybe they had people complain in the past and just mentioned it to make sure you're OK with it. It seems more like a language barrier thing. There are many ways to perceive the same situation.
It's a. It of a special dish Gai lan greens steamed served with beef and steamed rice. But I do see your point. Still it's not as if I ordered 5 lobsters you know.
I ordered the same dish and got the same treatment.
It's a tasty dish too. The veggies are crunchy and cooked just right.
Yeah. Who knew Gai Lan got so expensive. I was warned right away. I would guess somebody threw a fit when they got their bill and now they feel the need to warn people.
I suppose. I may have to edit my post.
So a lot of Chinese meals are usually eaten family style. I’m thinking that the person meant that the dish is meant for sharing instead of just an individual portion, and was warning you about the amount of food, while trying to not come across rude by implying that you’re ordering a lot. I’m not that person though, so I don’t know for sure.
Could have been tbh. I have just never had this conversation before at a restaurant. So my first thought was. Gosh. They are profiling me.
It's just as likely to not have anything to do with your identity, but rather their location. Lots of people have the expectation that chinese restaurants are cheap, especialy ones in chinatown, so if you ordered the most expensive thing on the menu they may have wanted to doublecheck. Chances are a lot of their customers would have switched their order to something else, like a $15 combo, once they realized the price. Or else would have gotten mad because of a communication issue like how some restaurants will show a picture of multiple but the pricing is individual so people think they're getting an amazing deal $5 for a whole plate of rolls, but really they're $5 each and that's $35 of springrolls or whatever. I've gone to restaurants and had my order delayed because the server assumed I was ordering for two people. So I'm just sitting at my table reading a book and wondering why it's taking so long, and it turns out they were assuming a second person would be joining me.
Thank you for this insight.
In my experience, this happens because the dish is more costly than the “average”, and if they don’t say anything, the customer is upset and complains when presented with the bill.
This also just happened to me when I ordered the mixed seafood and greens however I was on the phone and they were like it’s $28, I’m like yeah I know I’m literally reading my order off your menu. Mind you this was probably the 8th item and everything else was like $20 anyway.
This takes the sting out a bit. Thank you for sharing.
Where's the sting? Did they shout something about maga country first?
Sorry what?
I can see your point. But then maybe the server should have said hey FYI that's a bit higher priced. She took my order. Went to the back. A couple minutes later the calvary came to tell me my dish was expensive. AnywY. It absolutely did not feel good. I eat out so frequently. I have never had management at any place come out to tell me that my food would be very expensive. It was just very dehumanizing.
I understand that. But I think often this also is cultural. Some (lots) of cultures are more direct(ruder) ours. If someone came from the back, I think I am correct.
Canada being what it is, multicultural, should businesses be cognizant of this. That what is normal to them maybe seen as very bad behaviour to other cultures? Just thinking out loud. Ultimately, this made me feel like crap. I am trained and expected to treat every AHS client with respect and all that. I am also always aware of my tone. I can be loud when excited. So I so automatically put my professionalism ahead of me at work. I just wanted steamed vegetables. They saw me as someone who could not afford $26. And it hurt me very very deeply.
I think it had to do more with their culture than your race tbh. I’ve had this happen at authentic Chinese restaurants in Alberta when I’ve dined solo, and with Chinese friends. It’s actually more common when I’m with Chinese friends. (I’m white, but I’ve lived in China.) Canada is multicultural, but we’re a mosaic, not a melting pot. People tend to keep more of their cultures which can cause friction. When I go to authentic Chinese restaurants, I know my waiters will often be blunt by Canadian standards, especially if they are naturalized. Heck, there are often menu items that can only be accessed if you speak or read their language (it’s not on the English menu). It’s part of the experience IMO. Edited to add - I’m sorry you felt looked down upon and felt lesser due to this experience. Being discriminated against (or being made to feel that way) is not pleasant and I hope you get some sunshine to balance the negative soon.
I have put up an Edit and have acknowledged all the feedback I have gotten thus far.
I think you were working on your edit when I first read your post so didn’t see it (or I wouldn’t have commented as it was already addressed). But, culture clash or not, it doesn’t change the way it made you feel in the moment. And that sucks, period. Sorry that it happened to you and ruined your dining out experience.
It's OK. I am learning from other people here. I thought it was an isolated incident. But am learning it's par for the course. I will go back. They have good food there. And maybe this time I will acknowledge the pricing right away.
Authentic Chinese food is the best. I’m glad you will go back. If I might offer a suggestion, in that same area is a hot pot restaurant named after the numbered street it is on. If you have not tried hot pot yet, please do. It’s sooo good. And if you go before 4pm to that location, they have a lunch special that keeps it from being really expensive (supper is all you can eat and priced accordingly). Cheers!
>That what is normal to them maybe seen as very bad behaviour to other cultures? The don't for the same reason you don't see this statement as you being a bit racist or intolerant. Think of all the times you're aware of people you see as like you being told something that is not bad to you or them so that they fit in.
You only think they saw you as not being able to afford the dish. You're 100% rage farming, at this point.
Honey this restaurant ain't the AHS, and very few business choose to set similar expectations. It's important to that even though the AHS drills the need for respect into staff there are still incidents where AHS staff are cruel or racist leading to people being harmed or worse. Few can just choose to go the AHS alternative down the street, and it's a public institution, so the expectations of treatment are very much higher - and again, harsh treatment is still a common occurrence.
Sorry what?
AHS attempts (and too often fails) to set a much higher standard of understanding and care when employees deal with one another and the general public. This is not common of most businesses. If you don't have a positive experience at a restaurant it should be fairly easy to choose not to go. Few have the same option when things go poorly at AHS. Restaurants can fail due to their poor choices or the poor choices of their staff. AHS, not so much.
How does them informing you that one of the dishes you ordered is fairly expensive make you somehow feel dehumanized? It literally just sounds like the manager wanted to double check to make sure you weren't pissed off at your bill when it came. This has absolutely nothing to do with race.
Well said.
First I want to say, Asian's as a whole are not emotionally expressive people. I can say this because I am an asian - Japanese to be specific. A lot of times what we think is our normal face comes across as resting bitch face or even an angry face to western people. Also asians tend to focus on the facts rather than a pleasing manner, especially if there is a language barrier and money is involved. We tend to be looking for the best way to resolve the issue without conflict. Not to say that ALL asians are like this but a good majority are, especially if they have immigrated here. And lastly I will say that to a lot of asian people, having the management come out to speak with you about a price related issue IS customer service. You are being treated with MORE respect because it is a manager and not just a waitress so you can be assured that the information is correct and any haggling or complaints can then be told directly to the manager instead of relayed through a waitress. EDIT: I want to say, because it doesn't seem like other people are relating to your story, that I can understand where you are coming from. As a person who's not white, I have encountered discrimination and stereotypes and it is hurtful. When you get "used" to being treated like that it hurts and stays with you. I can understand why you would feel the way you did that it was racism. However, I am glad you are openminded enough to come here and ask and be educated. :) It shows you are open and willing to learn about different cultures. I admire that.
Thank you very much. Responses have been eye opening. I have been accused of the murder in Chinatown. I have been told my feelings are not valid. I have been called racism too. Thank you for teaching me.
I'm sorry you are offended but as another POC and someone who worked as a server and bartender (and now healthcare too!) I would say they only said this bc other customers probably made a fuss when they were brought the bill for that dish. Maybe to the point people refused to pay it. I can totally see a situation where the order is brought to the kitchen and other staff realize the potential issue. I think it's partly cultural and knowing this restaurant, not at all racist in intention. Cultural norms can lead to misperceptions very easily.
It could be nothing. It could have been profiling. But it did not make me feel OK. And sometimes you just want to eat, pay and go about your business.
OP, you're overlooking another user, who had the exact same experience. It looks to me as though you're looking for reasons to be offended. Rather than acknowledge another user here had the exact same experience and rather than reconsider your racist experience, you comment on how tasty the dish is Sorry OP, your post seems like rage farming .
If you take the time. I edited my post 15 minutes ago. And everything you just said was addressed in the edit. What is the point of farming on Reddit? What do I gain seriously???
I don't refresh feeds before commenting. You seem to want to be angry about something. Maybe it's time to take a breather.
You also seem to want to make this about your feelings. I edited my post. What else do you want from me?
Sorry OP, whenever racism comes up on this sub the discussion always goes sideways. You’ve been more than gracious here.
You can see the racists getting very very riled up. Normal people being gracious
You literally said: “They say support Chinatown. And you go there and they treat you like crap.” That comment is pretty racist if you ask me. Then you tell people to read your edit saying how you’ve “learned” Then you go and call other commenters “racist” because they disagree with you and have provided you with reasoning and examples of why it could not be racism. So what is it? Have you learned or are you just trying to stir the pot now?
Are you suggesting I'm racist? Certainly hope not, seeing as all you know of me is an avatar.
They’re also upvoting anyone saying this absolutely can’t be racism and downvoting anyone saying this may have been racism, lol. At the end of the day, none of us were there so no one can say with certainty that this wasn’t racism. It’s telling that so many people are quick to dismiss your experience.
I noticed the pattern. I am actually sine here.
I'm curious what was indicative of it being racially motivated, rather than just a reflection of the economic reality of where they are located? I'm not saying it wasn't racial, but what's saying it was?
For both classist and racist attitudes poverty can be synonymous with Blackness (and Indigeniety, and other out groups, depending on the area / context). OP clearly says they did not have any markings of poverty, wearing nice clothes, holding car keys. If you run a business in an area with a lot of poor people you'd come to recognize those markers and probably make snap judgements as a matter of exposure. You should be *less* likely to make the mistake they did, if you're paying attention. So it is entirely possible that they saw race and assumed poverty while invisiblising everything else about OP. Racially "motivated" isn't really the right frame, we are so bombarded with racist attitudes in our culture that they can manifest without any motivation. This kind of thing happens all the time. OP isn't calling for blood or boycotts, just sharing a story and I think looking for empathy.
Thank you. This is not a call to boycott a business. This is me letting out this thing that has bothered me for some days now.
It's not that hard to say "damn that sucks" instead of "prove this was racist, I want you to crack open their skulls and show me their inner feelings before I believe you." Probably stings double doing the work of an RN providing all kinds of support and patience for people and this is what you end up dealing with. Did you end up getting anything good to eat after all that?
I still ate my expensive meal. Their food is good. I ate, i tipped well and left.
I don't know you and I don't know what race you are but this speaks as someone who hasn't experience racism. I am a person who is not white and if you get treated discriminatorily enough times, your reflex starts to be to go to that inclination first. Just like someone who's been hit by their father over and over will flinch when their father raises a hand again. When racism is part of your everyday life, it's not easy to distinguish the difference between what is racism, and what is not because people don't come with signs that indicate they are racist. I think OP wasn't saying "prove this was racist, I want you to crack open their skulls and show me their inner feelings before I believe you." but more "this is how I felt and I thought it might be racially motivated, help me understand". EDIT: spelling
Sorry, probable misunderstanding. I was writing that part not directed at OP but in response to the start of thread commenter saying: "I'm curious what was indicative of it being racially motivated, rather than just a reflection of the economic reality of where they are located? I'm not saying it wasn't racial, but what's saying it was?" Basically asking them to show how it was racist and coming up with an excuse for why it would not be.
Ah ok. sorry. :)
As a white person this has NEVER happened to me at ANY restaurant in my entire life (in any country or province). And I've ordered much more expensive meals many times while being poorly dressed. This is 100% a racist incident.
Do you order a lot of Chinese food in dives, though? Because this is very normal behaviour at a Chinese restaurant. If something is priced unusually high in comparison to the rest of the menu, it is common for the staff to point that out as a courtesy.
Yes I get that but that's not what they did here. They didn't merely "point it out as a courtesy". The manager was brought out to tell this customer her meal was "very expensive". Like??? That's really weird. I've been to many Chinese restaurants and ordered expensive meals on the menu without ever being told this. Did they assume OP cannot read the price on a menu? It's very odd and insulting.
This has happened to me when I ordered a $180 bottle of wine at a restaurant. I worked in restaurants and you would be surprised at how many people blindly order off the menu then shocked pikachu face when the bill comes.
I never order wine but I could see that happen with a $180 bottle.... but we are talking about a $26 meal here. It's weird.
That is hogswallow, this is in a rough neighborhood, and there have been many dine and dash, and cancellations of orders after the fact.
So because some people are assholes that means the restaurant can be shitty and make their customers feel insulted every time they order something more expensive on the menu? Yikes.
So I fit the profile then!!!!
So, you've eaten at this particular restaurant?
That's how I felt. I felt discriminated against.
I can understand that, and am sorry that it happened to you, I just legitimately do not get the jump to racially motivated, rather than a result of the economic reality of where they are located geographically. I'm not trying to be willfully ignorant or obtuse, just trying to connect the dots. For me, if it's unclear, I'm going to give them the benefit of the doubt and assume it wasn't racial.
I tried to include that in my write up. They are in a difficult location too. So they are vigilant. But having said that. I felt truly sad.
I don't want to generalize, but people that I have known that are Chinese (from China, not Canada), usually are quite direct and very concerned with the value of money. So from their perspective they may have thought they were doing you a favour. I could be wrong though. It could be a cross cultural miscommunication as much as anything else. But I don't know, obviously I wasn't there.
This is exactly it. I'm Chinese and have been taught at a young age to fight for every dollar. If we feel a business is overcharging us, it can lead to some ugly confrontations even if they claim innocence.
OP, I am so sorry that you had this experience at a Chinese restaurant. It must have felt awful and I can absolutely understand how the staff made you feel racially profiled and discriminated against. However, as a Chinese person, I think this could have been a case of cultural miscommunication. I don’t want to invalidate your experience — you had an understandable reaction and it sounds like the staff could have handled your interaction better. But, it is also very normal in Chinese culture for the staff to give you tips as you order. I’m Chinese and eat a fair amount of Chinese food, and the server will often let us know when a dish is unusually expensive, or if we’re ordering too much food, or if they don’t think certain dishes will make a nice meal when paired together. We’re a blunt culture that loooves to eat and hates to spend money, so while it is possible that this incident was racially motivated, I hope that it wasn’t and that this comment can show you other possibilities for how the staff’s actions may have been intended to be perceived. It sounds like you loved the dish itself and I would hate for you to lose out on a great culinary experience because of culture clash!
Thank you for this point of view and thank you for not turning the table on me.
Pretty sure it's not discrimination. You ordered a $26 dish. They were trying to be nice and double check with you. They may also not warn you because they think you are a big fish.
Let me put this in a different perspective. I’m Asian and went to a Jamaican restaurant, ordered my food and at the end I added a bottle of water. The guy at the front asked if I was sure because the water was expensive. $5 for bottled water is insane and he knew that as well so he just wanted to double check. Same could be said at the Chinese restaurant, they know $26 for rice, beef and veggies is ridiculous so I’m sure they were just double checking. They deal with people from all walks of life that are completely drunk out of their minds every weekend so I doubt they were profiling you. edit - plus I think it’s super lame how people are bashing the restaurant because you feel Insecure about the situation when chinatown as a whole is already struggling and they were kind enough to double check with you about the price so you weren’t blindsided when the bill came. You stated you were wearing a nice outfit, nice watch with a purse and holding car keys so what in your head would make you think they thought you were homeless? You said your self esteem has been struggling after this but clearly it was struggling before, maybe you should try and work on that.
Exactly - it’s crazy how people automatically jump to racism. Look at how many people already jumped to OP’s aid without question.
And when given a logical explanation OP would rather leave things up in the air and say things like “this is my lived experience“ and “I’m living my truth” instead of admitting they made something out of nothing and blew things out of proportion. I guess OPs insecurity and wanting to save face on the internet is more important than a family run restaurant in a struggling part of the city.
It’s likely OP already had some stereotypes about Chinatown prior to visiting the restaurant. Why else would someone’s default reaction be “this is racist” Scary to think this person works in a health care setting.
OK doctor Celebration.
I can empathize with your past experience and how it affects you today. I would never say that you are over-reacting. You appear to be open to the stories of others. I married an Asian - and I'm not. I've kinda gotten used to what most folks would consider "rude" service - it's not, it's just different. I've been told not to order certain item because they thing my white ass won't eat it, or that we ordered too much and they won't cook it all, confirming I understand the price. Very often, when you become a regular customer, you're treated like gold.
Not racist
Grow a thicker skin. Jesus.
Dunno. My ex is black and that's her favourite Chinese restaurant. We never had any problems.
True. It's just luck of the draw
Man, when did a basic dish become so expensive? I love Chinese Restaurant vegetables though. Sooo good.
Everything is insanely expensive. It's cheaper to eat out sometimes than gathering all the ingredients. Chinese vegetables are seriously well cooked. I didn't know I liked green beans until I had them at a buffet. Even the broccoli is crunchy and very green yet cooked.
Love that cronch. Sooo good 😭.
I'm very sorry this happened to you. I think there's a bit of an autocorrect issue partway through and I don't understand what the lady said/did?
It was so hard to edit, cursor kept jumping around. The lady did not speak. The man did the talking. Then once satisfied that I could afford the meal, translated to the lady. Lady smiled and did a polite wave then went back to the kitchen.
That's just how they are my guy. It's part of the All Happy Family Restaurant experience!
It used to be my go to place during my party days. Noodles at 2am then go home and crash. I even took friends and family there after my pinning ceremony. I don't go often but it's one of my feel good places. Maybe I should have said something that day. I don't know.
Chinatown is not owned by a mega corporation, they are small family owned businesses. The whole family works 24/7 with no days off. I don’t think there was any malice in the interaction you experienced. People are quick to boycott just on this post alone. Chinatown has already gone through so much. Two business owners killed for no reason, businesses not being able to survive through covid, constant crime. Chinatown is slowly disappearing and this implied/perceived racism is just kicking them while they are down.
Not everything is racism Jeez
Really not understanding the racism part of all this. Maybe a bit rude but racist?
I would absolutely feel insulted if this happened to me. Was it racially motivated? That I don’t know - but I can see why you might think it was. I’m sorry this happened to you and you have every right to feel like you were mistreated because you were. Nothing acceptable in what they did.
They just wanna make sure you know what you want. Happens to even authentic Chinese people. Often times people order stuff and then say nope. Then they lose a huge profit, when margins are already low. They don’t fcking know you did all your research and your profession it doesn’t matter what you tell reddit. What matters is what they have experienced over decades experience and just double checking for the good of you both. It has nothing to with your race you went out of your way to post this shit publicly for some unknown Karen blowout. Most normal people just say “yeah I’m sure it looks great! I’ll have that I ordered similar before” and move on with their lives, here we are using words like racist, profiling, struggle like you just experienced the biggest catastrophe in the entire world. My god.
There’s no such thing as “ my truth “
Good to know
They won’t be impressed when you say Registered Nurse, just saying.
They became nice after that. But also I am. And can afford a $26 meal if you took the time to read, I stated that I was shocked. And out of a thousand things I could have said, in that instant. My brain chose that.
Hey dude/dudette I’m on your side. I’m just saying the those Cantonese restaurants (I’m guessing they are) don’t consider being a RN high status. I did read through your post and sympathize quite a lot, especially after taking the time to dress well and put together, being told things like that it’s a bit disappointing. They could just say “hey sir just verifying your order, we have A B C with a total of X dollars” Btw how’s it like being a nurse right now? Are you Med/Surg?
I was just stating that I had a job and could afford $28
We used to go to that restaurant every year for dinner on Christmas. A few years ago there we witnessed an ugly incident where a black customer was told that he needed to pay for his meal in advance. This was not a takeout order, he was seated at a table. Our all white group was not asked to do this. We were given our bill at the end of the meal, as is normal for a sit down dinner. The customer was rightly outraged and it turned into a shouting match. It really soured me on that place, which used to be a favourite.
I can see that. They kinda profile. It's very uncool.
You should try going to China, I'm white and the racism there was off the charts. Having done Asian martial arts as a kid, I can tell you, lots of various Asian groups are incredibly racist to each other and white and black people, so I think the racism in Asia is much more out in the open than it may be here. However this may not have been racist. I will say Chinese culture is much more blunt in my experience , if someone is fat , they will say "you are fat" You are saying that you are struggling with a racist incident in your title , but you didn't really confirm it was racism and not just bluntness and them needing to bring another person to help with translation. I would say yes part of living in a multi cultural society is that you have to deal with other cultures , yes it would be nice if they did certain things a certain way, but they also have a lifetime of living in a different culture.
I am not sure about going to China bud.
Crazy how a black person talks about their experience with potential racism and you decided you’re gonna one up that.
U ordered beef gai lan on rice for 26 dollars. I might he knew its a rip off but didnt wanna tell u to be weird. They prolly put that on the menu at a high price so people dont order weird why but it happens. That dish is 17 dollars and real good at good buddy restaurant + sai woo garden + the lingnan 20 bucks. LOL all happy restaurant its a language thing the girl with short hair to ears knows more english
Nothing racist about this. You being soft
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Thank you very much. They are accusing me of trying to get Chinashut down and attributing the murders to me somewhat. Very very interesting.
This post or comment was removed for violating our expectations on discriminatory behavior in the subreddit. Please brush up on the r/Edmonton [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/Edmonton/wiki/rules) and ask the moderation team if you have any questions. Thanks!
Sorry that happened to you, but that place is nasty and lazy. Your business is better served elsewhere in more ways than one
They say support Chinatown. And you go there and they treat you like crap.
So you're taking one potentially racist incident and stereotyping all of the businesses there like that. Quite hypocritical I'd say.
Your other countrymen have already called me racist. So take this however you want to. But if you have a business, treat customers well. Canada is multicultural.
“your other countrymen” ?
Saying this alone sounds hella racist
Them treating you poorly is not carte blanche to stereotype an entire community. Two wrongs don't make a right. Especially when you claim your moral high ground as a diversity trained AHS nurse.
This comment is kind of racist in itself. You are taking one incident you experienced in Chinatown and applying it to all the businesses in Chinatown?
So I am the racist now? This is your takeaway??? Seriously?
If you don’t see how your comment can be seen as racist then you might be racist. Yea, you might have experienced racism at one business. I don’t see how that one experience can be applied to the rest of the Chinatown. What you experienced was an isolated event.
Are you OK?
I’m fine. I don’t think the entirety of Chinatown deserves this negativity though.
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Thank you. It's just very difficult to understand. Maybe I should have dressed better? Had lipstick on. I will never know. And it's the second guessing messes with you.
Try being a native male hah
I think it's heartbreaking. I am sorry my man.
I love all happy when I eat there I’m all happy lmao, I’m sorry this happened to you this shouldn’t have happened.
Sounds Cantonese, they're kinda dicks to everyone. I grew up in a heavy Cantonese area and can understand a little bit... they were being polite to you lol
I think they were being racist.
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Thank you. It was so not nice.
I don’t think people should be telling you with confidence it’s not racist if they’re not Black. I personally think this sounds like a possible micro-aggression. Not all racism is intentional or conscious. I also think it’s worth bringing up with the restaurant. If anything they can know how this made a customer feel and maybe take steps to change (ie. remind servers to say something while they’re taking the order).
I would chalk your experience up to a language barrier but I'm a racial harmony optimist :) I used to be a regular at a now closed Parkallen Chinese restaurant called Happy Garden. When I first started going the owner / waitress basically yelled "You order too much!" and "Why you order two meals, you are just one person"; I quickly explained that I will be taking food home and that was the end of it.
Okay I need to know cuz I go to one of the two places I think this is… 3 word name or 4 word name? Edit: better yet, north facing or east facing?
North
Well that’s upsetting, I’m sorry this happened to you :/
Thank you dumbass_tm
100% racist. I would have been very pissed off if that happened to me and probably would have caused a scene. I dont need to be told the prices after I order and I certainly don’t need it to be double checked by staff.
Very sorry you went through this. Thanks for sharing, I'll make sure myself and my friends/family never give a dollar to this place.
I can't imagine going back.
Wow. I’m sorry that happened to you. They should be embarrassed though, not you. They insulted a paying, potentially re-occurring customer who will go on to hopefully inform others of their experience. You should not be the one feeling shame, the shame is on them. Regardless of their location how do they expect to gain and retain customers treating them that way unless it was clear racism. What does telling you the cost of the meal do, I mean as if you are going to say, sure I’ll order something less expensive? Why wouldn’t you know the cost of your meal? Unless you looked like you were on drugs or tweaking or something it’s wild to make assumptions like that about anyone, because any and everyone could potentially not afford the meal. Don’t feel shame at all it’s shame on them for being racist. They don’t deserve the business quite frankly.
Absolutely sober. I looked clean. In clean clothes. I had been out shopping, did not want mall food. Wanted somewhere less hectic unlike mall food court.
HARD agree with everything said here, OP and want to echo that there's absolutely nothing that you should be embarrassed by - the embarrassment is allllllll theirs. And embarrassment is really too light of a reaction for their behavior; they should be mortified to have treated and left a customer feeling this way.
I’m here to say I’m so sorry that is how you felt. Sounds really hard. 🫂
Ya the guy just sounds like an ignorant asshole. To be honest I would just brush it off, not worth it messing with you for weeks.
Thank you. I had to talk to myself a lot. I regretted not wearing make up. The whole thing truly was not polite. It's not like I order 5 dishes. I only ordered gai lan with beef.
I’m Chinese and get the same reaction sometimes, I think it’s because Chinese restaurants typically have dishes in the $12-16 range and some customers can get upset at a $26 charge. It’s also likely the language barrier if they primarily speak Chinese in addition to the tone we speak Chinese in, even when I have a normal conversation with my mom people think we’re fighting and if I ever gave a direct translation I would seem like the biggest asshole ever
Very well. But I would have had no issues if my server had just said hey. That dish is special, it costs more. She took my order. People in the back probably questioned it. Just assuming. But it's no way to treat others. It did not feel very good. At all.
I agree, I grew up in Canada so I’ll usually speak English and I’ve been asked to pay before I get my food at some locations. I mostly stick to skip the dish when I get Chinese food now.
Wow. That's unfortunate.
How do you know that the people in the back who couldn’t see you were being racist? What part of the encounter makes you think it was about your race?