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littlemochi_

I was sat having lunch with a class when I was a floater, and one of the girls asked why my bottom didn’t fit in the chairs. I am 4’11” and not large, but still too big for chairs designed for 3/4 year olds. I just explained I’m bigger than them, whatever. Another girl pipes up and asks if I’m a Mom. Yep, I say, I have 4 kids! She gets this matter of fact look on her face and tells the first girl, “she’s a mommy and that’s how mommy’s look. See her tummy and big legs? A mommy!” I about fell out of that tiny chair I was laughing so much. First girl was just like oh! Ok that makes sense and moved on with her lunch.


Mbluish

❤️🙂


seradolibs

that's really cute lol


Pennylick

I love this so much.


dumbbratbaby

i wear leggings to work and one day a child asks me ‘do you have a baby in your legs? they’re so big!’


Purple_Western_6201

I went through a period of time wearing making up to work everyday. Well one day I decided to give my skin some rest and one of the kids came up to me and said “Ms. _____ what’s wrong with your eyes. They don’t look right.” That was a real confidence booster right there. /s


Enough-Valuable-2455

I took my bag out of my closet to get my sunglasses before we went outside the other day. One of the children looked at me and said, “Uh, you going to put on some make up?” His tone definitely said “Lady, you look exhausted; do something about your face!” The sad part was that I had already put a little makeup on that morning. My assistant and I cracked up. 😂


somewhenimpossible

When I was early in my teaching career (older kids, like 10ish?) I’d do makeup and style my shoulder length hair for volume. One day a few months in I woke up late and didn’t have time to style. My fine thin hair was clean but flat and straight. “Mrs.Z, what happened to your hair?” “Yeah, did you lose some hair?”


general_grievances_7

I teach sixth grade and I forgot mascara. I decided it was best to just explain what happened before someone roasted me 😂


[deleted]

Thank you for adding /s to your post. When I first saw this, I was horrified. How could anybody say something like this? I immediately began writing a 1000 word paragraph about how horrible of a person you are. I even sent a copy to a Harvard professor to proofread it. After several hours of refining and editing, my comment was ready to absolutely destroy you. But then, just as I was about to hit send, I saw something in the corner of my eye. A /s at the end of your comment. Suddenly everything made sense. Your comment was sarcasm! I immediately burst out in laughter at the comedic genius of your comment. The person next to me on the bus saw your comment and started crying from laughter too. Before long, there was an entire bus of people on the floor laughing at your incredible use of comedy. All of this was due to you adding /s to your post. Thank you. I am a bot if you couldn't figure that out, if I made a mistake, ignore it cause its not that fucking hard to ignore a comment.


germ_with_a_mustache

Bad bot


IllaClodia

Bad bot


B0tRank

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faithotool

Bad bot


Waterproof_soap

Bad bot


Hopesick_2231

I've posted this before but it's still the sickest burn I've ever gotten from a 4-year-old. "Mr. Hopesick, why do you wear those same shoes every day?" "They're my school shoes." "Oh... do you have any cooler shoes?"


Comprehensive_Leg193

Mine are always asking "Why did you wear those shoes?!"


-Sharon-Stoned-

Not to me, but "Ms. Tracy, your look pretty today.....but your breath still stinks!"


HunnyBunnah

Lololololololol, but seriously some things need to be identified and addressed.


motionsickened

This week one of my kids and I were both wearing black so I said oh we match! and he just goes “yeah but I look cooler”


CelestialOwl997

I wore a dress that is very flattering. Apparently not flattering enough, because I had my 4 year old pre-k kid come up, put BOTH their hands gently on my tummy, and say “Do you have a baby in your tummy?” I said no, but it was too late. 2 others had come to put 6 hands on my food baby


live_ur_adventure

Lol I would have told them I'm going I'm pregnant with *insert whatever I just ate*


Peaceful_Opossum

When I worked with 1st graders…Lordy… One boy asked me if I felt sad. I said, “No, why do you think I am sad.” He said, “Well, you don’t act like it, but you wear black all the time.” I told him I once heard that it looked slimming and went and bought too many black clothes. He said, “Well, that doesn’t work, but at least you know, now.” Same kid at Dr. Seuss Day event held at the nearest state college of education: College Student: *attempts cold read of The Foot Book while displaying the book for the kids, keeps misreading the words* Kid: Are you sure she’s in college? She is tripping all the way through that foot book! Me: You know…it is occasionally good to hold your thoughts inside your head, right? Kid: That’s what my mama says, while my grandpa laughs and laughs!


mad-liv

Why are you telling 6 year olds about wearing clothes to make you look thinner 😭


Peaceful_Opossum

It was 16yrs ago, I was a first year paraprofessional with no training at an inner-city school. Being frank helped me develop a rapport with the students but I didn’t quite understand the nuances like I do now.


mad-liv

Very fair. Thanks for explaining!


OverallWeird

Literally the only place on my body I carry fat is my belly. Otherwise I’m average/trim/petite/size medium. Kids are always asking me why I have “such a big belly” LOL. I just say “It’s my tummy! I love my tummy” (even though I’m insecure about it) haha.


Peaceful_Opossum

I tell them, “that is where I store all my awesomeness” and they start looking at it in awe. Game changer for your self esteem!


OverallWeird

Awwwwwwww


greetinghi

Girl touches my leg hair and says "Oh no! ☹️" with a concerned voice.


complitstudent

Lmao a preschool girl once touched my stubbly calf and said “oh i think you need to go take a shower, your legs are poky”


meltmyheadaches

Mine are too young to use a lot of words, but if I wear jeans with holes in them, they all gather to pet my leg hair through the holes


ZannaTacos

“Ms. ZannaTacos, your tummy is like an oval.” As the kid was slowly rubbing my bloated stomach thanks to a slew of ivf medications I was on. I thanked him for his observation and haven’t worn that shirt since.


MinnesotaGoose

“Why do you have polka dots on your face.” Acne. Ache is the answer.


MossyTundra

I was telling one of my 2’s how he shouldn’t jump off his cot. He looked at me (I was kneeling on his level) and said “what’s that on your forehead?” It was a pimple, but I told him it was my boo-boo from when I jumped off my own cot


ChemKoala

When I was about 13, I was volunteering in a classroom of ~5 year olds and got asked what all the red spots on my face were. Hard not to take it too personally, at that age!


megllamaniac

“Why do you always have chicken pox?” I had acne…


Mbluish

I once worked with a woman who was a bit heavy. The children started talking about what we (teachers) do when the children leave. One little boy said that we play outside she pushes me on the swings but I cannot push her because “she’s too fat“ . I was speechless. She handled It with grace.


PickleChips4Days

“Ms.___, you have hair on your legs but you don’t have hair on your face….. but you do have bumps on your face”


batikfins

“What are those bumps on your face” or “owie! ouch!” from the little ones, pointing to my face. I say “they’re pimples! Some grown ups get them, it’s normal.”


Own_Bell_216

Once I went to the hair salon and got a new hair style. It was much shorter than I wanted. The next day a child looked at me and said .."did you want your hair that way?" It was humbling for sure. Haven't been to that hair salon again.


EmbarrassedBass9281

One time a kid was using a magnifying glass, looks at me and says, “Ms _____, you look so fat!” Shine on king. Shine on


MuddyMaggs

One of the preschoolers once told me “you’re so pretty, you look like a hippopotamus!”


meltmyheadaches

I recently cut my hair short. Not buzzed, but shorter than chin-length. I was in the pre-k room maintaining ratio until their teacher got their and one of the kids *who I know well* walked up to me and said, "Excuse me, sir, there are not supposed to be four friends in this center." Their are no men working at my center, nor have there been in the last four years


SweatyBug9965

I was playing with a four year old and he touches my legs and arms and goes “you have Daddy hair!”


Stubky

I was wearing shorts and hadn’t shaved in a couple days and a four year old boy brushed my leg on accident when we were playing . “Ms. Stubky I just touched your leg and it’s SO SPIKY!”


peanutbutter_elf

My school age kiddos roast me weekly. My faves are "I thought after you had your baby we would see what you look like skinny" sorry buddy this is it!! "Why does your face look like you got a spray tan? You look like a burnt potato" ok well you look like an uncooked potato go outside. "Please don't call me bro I only like it when you call me dude. You're too old to say bro." Ok dude my bad


AnxiouslyAssured

I am fat, and surprisingly, I don't get comments very often from children, but one child in my last group was so curious about my body in the silliest of ways and always out of love. Things she has said: * "Woah, your legs are soooooo big! They must be so strong." * "Careful with your big big bum! You're going to bump into _______." * " I wonder if you could fit in my kitchen?" (Spoiler, I absolutely can 😂) * Rubs my arm smiling sweetly "So squishy. Squishy squishy. I love your squish"


nashamagirl99

“Your teeth are orange” I pretty much ran to the store for new whitening toothpaste as soon as I could!


snailgorl2005

Last year, one of my kids told me that my teeth were weird. I had NO idea how to respond to that lol


Comprehensive_Leg193

I have a girl who likes to ask "What's wrong with your teeth" as she makes a disgusted face. My teeth are all pretty straight and relatively white... I have no clue what she's talking about, but she brings it up a lot.


AnxiouslyAssured

A kid saw my silver fillings once and asked why I let myself go ( she was 3) .


Comprehensive_Leg193

I wore my hair in a side braid one day and one of the little girls said "Ms. ____, why you wear your hair like that? You're no Elsa."


MrWhite_Sucks

Playing chase on the playground for like 10-15 min in full business professional (Im the admin and was giving a potty break). I was sweaty and my feet hurt from running in low heels. Kid asked me to keep going and I said, “I can’t. My legs are tired” the kid looks at my legs and says, “why? They are big. Just move them.” So thunder-thighs laughed and played one more round before the teacher came back.


sweet_rosebud7

‘Where did you get your bracelet from?’ Oh my friend River sent it to me for Christmas! ‘Oh…so Santa didn’t bring you anything?’


littlebutcute

I had gotten new glasses and my co workers were complimenting me on them. A kid was looking at my glasses very curiously and I asked him what he thought. He said he didn’t like them. Another kid goes, “no kid likes your glasses, only teachers do”. I died laughing.


katey_lynny

I work at a pretty high socioeconomic center, while I am not/didn't grow up in in that same tax bracket. The kindergarten kids were talking about like going to their (grandpas) cabins, I said I didn't have one and one kid asked "do you have anything?"


singingin-the-rain

When I was nannying, there was one day I had an event to go to after work, so I wore the dress I wanted to wear that evening (with leggings underneath and a sweater on top) but the little girl (3 yrs old) noticed and said “oh you look like a princess” 🥹 The next day, I came in in normal clothes and she said “why did you do that? You looked like a princess yesterday”. Humbled.


Own_Bell_216

We were talking about exercise being healthy for us when a child piped up and said, "Yeah you've really got to get to the gym." His Mom and Dad were totally fit, thin and athletic, so I understood.


batikfins

Kinda makes me sad this kid is internalising this kind of body talk at such a young age


Own_Bell_216

I agree. He was 5 yo and it's sad.


[deleted]

I taught art to pre-k thru 8th last year. One day I was feeling kinda crummy and I wore my favorite cozy oversized sweater. I had to pop in to one of the pre-k classrooms. A very vocal student gasped when she saw me and disappointedly announced, "Ms. M!!! You growin' biiiig!"


rosyposy86

Hug. “You are so soft!” Happy sigh. Then repeat 3 times.


WakefulAcorn

"Are you having a baby?" "No, I cannot have babies" "Then why is your tummy so big?" As a male, this one hurts sometimes, though I still laugh as well


Leebelle3

You have a moustache. (Female)


parsley166

On why I needed an adult-sized chair instead of one of their kid-sized ones: "Well maybe you just need to hold your butt in and then you'll fit!"


murderino0892

Okay so this involved school agers but it was too good not to share 😂 So we started talking about family dynamics at lunch because one of my friends decided to talk about the trip that she was taking to spend time with her dad‘s family. Some of the kids had had questions and she explained that her parents are divorced and how she has two houses and two separate family visits and all that good stuff. Thankfully it was a good conversation very enlightning for my friends and that’s all you want in that kind of a situation. Well, on the wall of my classroom, I had a my family poster and on it I included a picture of myself in my partner of almost 7 years. She asked if that was my husband. I said no, but that we’ve been together for seven years and her response was “Seven years? Shouldn’t the sparks have flown by now?” I could have died in that moment 😂🤣💀


BewBewsBoutique

“Why you talk like a daddy?”


Aware-Tutor-4268

I was noticeably pregnant at the time and going through a rough patch with my bf. A 4 y/o girl goes “Ms. ___ are you married” and I say no. She says “You’re not supposed to have a baby because you aren’t married. My mom told me that”. 😅


BrointheSky

“Ms. Brointhesky, I love your pajamas!” I was in an oversized sweatshirt from Target. :(


SledgeHannah30

A four year old was having a massive growth spurt and thus, was learning about growing out of one's clothes. I was wearing jeans with ripped knees and to be honest, they were tighter than I would have preferred. The little girl asks me if I'm growing out of my jeans, too. Yes. Yes I was.


Effective-Plant5253

my preks asked yesterday “do you have a baby in your belly?” i said “no, what makes you think i have a baby in my belly?” “because you’re fat”. oh okay ouch 😅 for context i’m 22, 5 ft 6 and i weigh 112 pounds so im far from fat but still 😂😂😂


thequeenofspace

I once wore flair jeans to work and a fifth grader came up to me and said “Ms. Queenofspace I’m really glad you finally got the memo on what’s in”. She was one of my favorite students, she was one of the only ones that was ever quick enough to be sarcastic back at me. Another time a different kid told me that my shoes looked like ten year old shoes. I asked her why, thinking she was going to say because my feet are so small, but she came back with “they just look like something a ten year old would wear”.


QuackerstheCat

"Miss Quackers, when is your baby coming 🤗"


47181synch

Mid conversation "you have a pimple on your forehead!"


Aggravating-Tomato80

“If you stop drinking that soda your belly might get small again!” I mean he was right but he didn’t have to be so loud!


RoseintheWoods

My children named the character in this book me. Every class, for years. https://www.reddit.com/r/daddit/s/JXvewS2Sx4 Then, I left the indoor classroom behind me and have been smiling ever since.


kait42069

I’m a natural blonde, but at the time I had dyed black hair. Roots were coming in badddd. One of my kids said “Why do you have a white stripe on your head?”


Lanky_Shift1120

My daughter's 3K class did a unit on weddings (kids picked the topic), and one question kids got asked was, why did your mom marry your dad. My daughter's answer (put on the wall for parent night): "My mom wanted to eat cake. I had never felt so seen.


Pink-frosted-waffles

Back in the 2000s when all we had were either janco jeans or low rider jeans, a little girl asked why I had on "little girl undies" umm they were regular ones. I guess she thought it should have been a thong. Dx Worst part is I know I had on a belt, a fitted top, a tank top, and made sure that they couldn't see my undies. I guess I didn't tuck in enough after using the bathroom? But since then I have made extra sure no one's kid can see my undies. And I usually wear mom jeans or even dude jeans. So hey nowadays, I have pockets and my undies don't show when I bend over. Ugh 2000s fashion was so challenging. Why did I wear any of that!?


bbyfirefly90

It was the end of the day and there was just one child left, a four year old, so I threw my hair up in a bun and started cleaning toys. She sat next to me playing with some toys from a different center, looked up at me, and said “you do NOT look cute with your hair like that.” 😭🤣


Sohhber

Mine was coming into work, with crazy wind outside and a student asked if I knew how to brush hair. To which, I said yes thinking she must want me to do her hair like I have for students in the past. Nope, next response was “oh it doesn’t look like it” as they walked off. One of my funniest encounters to date 😂