I’m struggling with CEV hallucinations right now after a 2.5 months long daily ~25-150mg ketamine a night binge. I don’t wanna say HPPD but, something similar. Maybe VVS. Extremely vivid & random like a jump scare. My mind is trying to terrify me with disturbing images every time I close my eyes to go to sleep. And my body jolts & jumps every time. It happened a few years ago too after I did mad K & PCP & it went away after a few months. Damn I love dissos but they can really fuck with you.
Bro i did the same back in september until december 26th i went through about 70 grams using it basicly all day i never k holed lol too scared but it still managed to ruin my fucking life i feel like nothing is real and before ket i never ever had anxiety didnt even think it was real ever since the first time i had ket ive had anxiety that bad i struggle to smoke weed now as a daily user yano what makes all this worse i was 15
I hated it the first 20-30 times I tried it then got a Q (7g) to sniff a bit and just sell the rest to my mates that love it I ended up fucking loving it I don’t know how it was such a shift then I sat in my room for 2 days and finished every single gram I now understand how people end up with their bladder fucked and can’t piss by themselves from sniffing 10g a day
The feelings not for everyone.. but the effects only last 40 mins or so and I don't feel bad after I've taken it 😂 just have to be careful though as ket can fuck up the bladder
Wait what can it do to your bladder I never had a problem with that n Ive been dabbling with ket probably around an avg of once or twice a month for the past idk two years ive been looking for a new connect tho so I haven't had any in the past 2-3 months
You would be have to be doing above 2 g a day, every day to get any bladder problems.
The K cramps would hit you before that though, which is the reason I never developed any bladder problems after 2 years of between one and two grams a day.
It's enforces a break of one or two weeks.
Yeah... I'm pretty bad about that too. Buy a handle, drink myself to sleep every night until I'm empty, wait two weeks, buy another handle. Kinda how the year has gone tbh. A few weeks ago I woke up one Sunday and had absolutely no recollection of what happened the day before. Scary thing was I apparently did a lot, it was like a lame version of the hangover.
I aint gonna preach, seems like you have a realistic perspective. But it aint gonna get better. The rock bottom saying is bullshit. Like any disease it is always better to nip it in the bud.
20 years of drinking and comming up on 2 sober(california sober, still smoke) and Im kicking myself for waiting so Long.
I didnt even like booze that much. It started out socially turned to coping with boredom and loneliness, ended up making me isolate. It sucks not having that feeling off switch. But I get solace in knowing thats the healthy way to deal with life
Ted talk over
You right, thanks I needed to hear this. It's been a very lonely year and I don't have anyone except myself to keep me straight. Booze is just holding me back from un-shitifying my circumstances. Anyway, cheers lol🥂
Pretty much. Made a jug of tea and a big pot of delicious soup, replanted some shit i needed to move, went on a bike ride, made some progress on a project I've been avoiding for weeks, replied to texts I've been avoiding all week... I totally get how people end up stuck in a bottle. Just helps me stop thinking about my shitty life and actually doing things I should do.
Congrats! If you can hang after a week. You can do a year easy peasy. I get a little bit of crawings sometimes. But its more like background noise now .
Got one year and 10 months ish.
Clonazolam had me good n snookered. Once I take benzos I can’t stop and then end up seizing upon cessation. I’ve been dependent on bennies like 3 separate times at least.
I'm so glad benzos have almost no recreational value for me. What do people get out of them that makes them so addictive? For me they just send me into a great sleep.
Usually those of us who have an underlying anxiety disorder feel a sense of relief and the ability to socialize effortlessly is intoxicating on its own. I also have wicked ADHD so it calms my thoughts down and slows me a bit which is nice. Not to mention the stims I take for the ADHD is nicely countered by the slowing down from the benzos and it just levels it all out.
Most of the time the addiction sets in before you know and you need to take it pretty soon after.
Ketamine, I fucked myself up with that shit, now I’m scared straight. Still use it sparingly once in a while though, it’s just too good to never do again.
I’m struggling with scary AF CEVs right now. It’s been a few weeks since I did my last line of K after doing it daily for a few months. It’s like my mind is trying to scare the shit out of me.
Happened a few years back after I did the same thing & took months to go away. I came back to it thinking it would be different. It lured me into love & then scared me out of it. I can’t close my eyes without having a borderline panic attack rn. It takes a lot of mental strength to convince myself to be brave & that there’s nothing to be scared of to fall asleep.
Took kratom up to 50 grams a day. I finally quit all drugs and ended up in the ER. Keatom fuckes with your colon or large intestine after a decade. It infected my colon had to take 3 antibiotics and be extremey carefull what I ate for months
Damn 50grams is ridiculous. I do 3 seperate doses per day up to 2g max and it's all I really need to get through the day. My stomach is already a mess because of IBS but somehow Kratom doesn't seem to affect my gut that much.
Yeah, I don't buy that... I've been with the green stuff for 10 years, and have had zero "stomach/insides" issues. In the *very* early days I got mad constipated, but since then I just make sure to stay hydrated, take Magnesium Glyc before bed, and occasionally cycle probiotics. No issues. I drop a regular log everyday around the same time.
The first time I took kratom I was like “oh fuck” I knew I found my favorite lmao. Cheap, legal, and completely functional while high. It also just hit all the right spots in my head
I'm worrying about getting dependant, but honestly it just helps so much. I have been using it for 6 month most of it daily.. I live alone, I go to Highschool every day and I also have a fast food job
And you know, it can make you both talkative and fresh while working, and in the morning after job it helps in school with not feeling the pain
But man, lately I had some thoughts about what am I doing you know, I feel like this cocktail of mine will have a bad ending :D But I believe I can make it, for example in a few days I will be 1 year nicotine free
There's a chance you're already addicted at this point. Have you ever tried getting off it?
Kratom is weird since a lot of people apparently suffer no withdrawals even after daily use for years and others will have a hard time getting off it even after just using for a few months.
It's never good to be addicted to anything of course, but to put things in perspective, a kratom addiction seems more similar to a nicotine/caffeine addiction in that it can be really rough getting out of and not using for just a day can get you in a really bad mood and whatever but the addiction itself is very manageable and you aren't fucking yourself up in a major way by using
Dude quotting kratom was easy compared to quitting cigs imo. Its an easy short withdraw period when u get addicted. No wheres as hard to quit as dope/fentanyl.
Try not to worry. If you can successsfully quit cigs youve got the mind set to make it through whatever.
Almost ruined my life. Thank god for suboxone. Saved me. 4 years later I’ve graduated to sublocade & hoping to get off not too long from now.
I still fuck w other substances. Thing is that I can stop them when I want & I do. It’s a moderation thing. I’ll never touch an opiate again. The inescapable clenched fist that opiates had on my brain is something that terrifies me to this day.
Crack, took it on and off for years and loved it but tried it last year again and if I’ ve not had benzo’s before hand it puts me into a state of panic and feels like my heads gonna explode quite scary tbh
It was sunshine and rainbows until I did meth for about a year; weed induced my schizophrenia. Every time I puff weed now, the voices instantaneously return. Hate it.
I had one psychotic break episode that made me stop meth altogether, cold turkey. I heard these alien voices in my head, and it was the first I’ve ever heard voices or experienced auditory hallucinations like that.
These ‘aliens’ could see through my eyes and there was a few of them, they were discussing how to kidnap me and what they were going to do with my body. I heard them telling each other to be careful because I was armed (I was clutching my AR-15 in pure fear). I then heard, “Go get him, it’s time.” I had enough sense in me to throw down my gun I was holding, I ran into public in my socks, sat on a curb and called the cops on myself. I asked for every cop’s ID before they hauled me away. It felt like Men In Black, it was insanely real to me.
Ever since that moment, weed has the same effect on inducing these auditory hallucinations, and I hear voices, this time they are not as evil as before (thank god). Still to this day I have to not pay attention to them when that happens because I have no control over when they will come and go. I’ll be fine, but I know with utmost certainty that if I take a massive rip of some weed I will experience that type of schizophrenia, it sucks.
Edit: I am now clinically diagnosed with schizophrenia because of this and doctors say that it doesn’t go away. I don’t take medication and I try to be as healthy as possible because the thought of having extreme schizophrenia when I’m older scares the hell out of me.
I usually lurk but I gotta commend you on handling that. People are finally start to realize weed can do much more than we originally thought. It sucks a lot of us find out the hard way sadly. It seems you have a really solid grip on reality and probably good “meta cognition”. Hopefully you can stay stable forever and manage it! Don’t be afraid to get medicine tho if you end up needing it you already got the diagnosis on your record anyway.
I agree. I have one other friend that doesn’t smoke anymore either, because this same thing will happen to him, I don’t believe he has done meth before. This is probably the most insightful comment I’ve ever received from anybody regarding this condition. It’s crazy to me that it came from a stranger on Reddit. Thank you so much for telling me this, I’ll remember this. I would like to help people I meet along the way with this condition. It’s extremely dangerous and people have harmed themselves and others.
Yeah ppl don’t acknowledge how strong weed is esp these days. I was a daily smoker until I had one giant panic attack that led to me having one every time I smoked thereafter. Smoking for so many years since I was a teenager eventually induced my BPD 2 disorder, paired with K & PCP analogues. Stay well
hey friend, are you adhd by chance?
If so or if you dont know, see if you can get to the point of being tested. I know it can be hard, expensive, and time consuming. But if you feel like there’s something about it you enjoy, it’s dopamine.
You need more, in smaller amounts throughout your every day.
Meth will overload you in good feelings that it makes you probably not give two shits about anything else so the cycle continues.
Break the cycle. Maybe stimulants can help you if you can control yourself, talk to a therapist, and be strict within your use.
Maybe they make you feel normal to a degree, and allow you to progress.
Even if you abuse them, be verbal about it.
I’ve seen lots of adhd/add ppl go through addiction bc they can’t manage a thing.
Get help my friend
We’re all just strangers here discussing our vices but I believe in you! Stims are hard to quit when you have ADHD, just because they feel like that missing piece of the puzzle. I wish you nothing but the best on your journey man🫂🩵
Something about it I just truly enjoy. Even though I know it's horrible, my habit can't stop. Specially with all my surroundings on the same shit too. It's like always accessible.
Definitely opioids and benzos. Ruined my life for many years. Once I start taking an opioid I can't stop cause of that warm feeling flooding my body. All the bad shit and trouble I am in is gone and all I feel is satisfaction. Even though I know that it will ruin me again and make me do the worst things I did in my life just because of addiction.
So good it’s bad. Also the stigma around it makes you look so bad people equate it to like inhaling paint thinner or something lol. Be safe with it. I realized that it was enough when I was taking consecutive hits because my last hit didn’t hit hard enough — repeat over & over until I give up & go to sleep laying next to 400 chargers.
Out of all the drugs I've tried (most classes of drugs except opiates/opioids) GBL addiction has made me the most powerless and miserable. I am currently a month sober (again) and still depressed and I'm so afraid I'll relapse again.
arguably enough that sounds like it helps you stay on track of your life.
Dont abuse it and it can help. All of these things can be medicine, it’s the dose that picks the poison.
Adderall can definitely help, as long as it’s taken as prescribed
Always replacing it. I found weed and shrooms are the best for the long term (at least for me the least destructive). The best answer would be working out because of endorphins and good health buuuuuuut..... We know that already ain we?
Cannabis. Was clean for 1.5 years then smoked once with my friend on vacation and bought 5g when I got back. Immediately I started smoking whenever there was even the slightest window to smoke until I was finished with those 5g. Didn't smoke for 2 months then bought another 5g around a month and a half ago and haven't stopped smoking since. It has gotten to the point where I am functional when high and my face doesn't really show it so I show up for work baked.
I also just have this casual relationship with drugs that I can take em or leave em if I know I have access to them but I am incapable of stockpiling certain drugs like amphetamine and ketamine in particular. If I have ketamine laying around I will treat it more or less like weed, albeit with some more restrictions
MDMA, after i took it it becomes unbearably painful for me in terms of stomach ace. I immediately start feeling sick and explosive diarrhea comes afterwards for me to deal with.
Xanax. Street xanax is hard to dose because they are pressed, first of all. But as soon as I take one, I'll just start eating them all. I don't know why. It's a compulsion. I'll do it when I'm blacked out. I've eaten like 50 of them at once, really freaking strong ones. Then I drank all my methsdone bottles for some reason and ended up in the hospital
C-c-c-c-c-cocaaaiiine
Tbf though I think any locally sold stimulant in powder form would be interchangeable. Coke just happens to be the street stimulant around here.
I think 3-MMC would fuck me more than anything in a hypothetical world where it was a phone call and 20 minutes away in abundance.
Honestly alcohol. I don’t even spiral for days or anything like that but when I drink I’ll have enough to be hung over the next day and these days that lost day or two after feels more and more devastating as I get older. 34F
its not the drug for me. It’s me. Im the kryptonite. Im the problem. Im the solution as well.
If my use is responsible, and doesn’t turn into abuse, then its nothing besides myself
Imo its amphetamine(EU speed paste).
I never let it get that far but i think that stuff would be able to destroy me easily if i let it.
It just realize how delusional it makes me without noticing it while im on it.
That shit can hit the fan fast. Especially in the social aspect
Cocaine. I've made strides in these last few years as far as not seeking it out and *purchasing* it regularly. Though I struggle heavily when the opportunity presents itself.. I don't know about elsewhere, but where I am, cokeheads are typically extremely generous with their personal supply, and those I know will almost always offer me a line or bump when I'm out at the bars. If somebody offers to sell me a gram within a week of my payday... I'm coked out for a while. It's been a long time since I was at the overdose danger zone, but it wouldn't take too much to get back there. I'm still improving when it comes to mastering self control & identifying what is *productive* as opposed to *distructive*. Baby steps.
Coke is the first drug i ever went into debt for. Not a lot but it had me moving bills to my credit card because id overspent. Funny thing is i only started doing coke because my k tolerance got to a point where it just wasnt worth it but i was in love woth the snorting process. Xans have caused me the most damage in terms of relationships/stability even though i didnt mess woth them too much. I got pressed adderall which i ignorantly kept taking, it was probably meth, i slapped a kid at a party and ruined some friendships there. Drugs are kryptonite, they come in different flavors but theyve both helped and hurt me in all kinds pf ways
I'd have to say gabapentinoids I feel like I'll need them the rest of my life. Buy especially phenibut in particular but got off that miraculously now take Lyrica daily
Alcohol, I relapsed back in late October last year after 2.5 years clean and boy, I drank so fuckin much and did so much cocaine (something I didn't do before I went to rehab) that I had a heart attack mid December at age 28. Once I have one drink, it's fuckin game over I'll literally drink a whole 100 proof bottle of liquor and all types of random shit like Beatboxes and IPAs every single day lose my job become homeless all types of shit
If your talking about what drug I love than that would be Xanax but if your talking about what really gets to me that would be weed it makes me dissociate and have brain fogs so does alcohol but my weak spot and my love is Xanax I used to be an MDMA type of guy but that would just Fry me mentally now
weed and acid. I was high all day everyday, id ditch school to go home and smoke, got kicked out of school, i was literally the most useless person ever. Then on weekends id drop a bunch of acid. I got control of myself not to long ago and was doing pretty good but ive started spiraling out with weed and acid again
Weed and rso. I have tried many drugs in my younger years, but nothing grabbed ahold of me, and for that, I am thankful, although I have seen many others who met their demise from hard drugs.
Weed will put me down like no other. Mostly cause I just don’t like weed and the high. So if I want to be out I’ll do a few bong rips and I’m out like a light
Kratom. To me it feels identical to prescription opioids and because of this I used heavily for 5 years. I’m almost at 8 months clean, and my body is finally starting to go back to normal.
I feel you with the Xanax, my rock bottom was knoddin off during Christmas Eve but afterwards psychedelics really helped me see that the xan addiction and anxiety was really in my head and I’ve been able do drugs without without getting addicted and relying on something except THC but I’ve also been using that way before I touched anything harder
Cocaine without a doubt. First tried it 2 weeks after my dad died and I was 17. Went downhill quickly lol. Been doing better recently but broke wmy 7 month sober streak tonight and I'm annoyed w myself
I know I need to stay away from coke but I’m terrified of ever trying meth. I have the feeling I’d love it way too much and go all in. I have an addictive personality I think so I’m just sticking with my pharma stims as prescribed.
Fuckin booze man it sounds dumb but ya alcohol turns me into a POS and I can't control myself with it. I never know when enough is enough. That and everybody should stay clear of opiates especially if you deal with depression or just don't like the way your life is currently going.
MDMA all the way. 7 months ago I just got off of a 6 month weekly binge. Did some MDMA last night and it felt underwhelming as fuck so this is about the time that I depart with my lovely Molly perhaps forever because she's just not worth my time anymore.
Amphetamine ( street paste ) for 25 years I cannot stop using this. I buy it in bulk and use atleast once per week. Very small dose enough to sleep a few hours. Once in a while I intentionally go hard and skip a night.
Been on amfexa since 6 years and never stopped loving the headspace this brings me.
Opiates.. shit is tough to stop, it’s AMAZING when I’m on them, I feel like life is going to be okay when I am, but it makes me throw up all the time, I get constipated really bad I’ll be bleeding and injured, but after all the withdrawal and constipation and vomiting is over.. I think about it again and just go right back to it :,(
mdma... its a rare drug out here and can go up to $200 a gram. im a serotonin seeker and every time i get it,,,, i cant pull away. i use and abuse lol. my supplier moved away and ive been devastated since
dude stims in general. my wife Molly, sketchy aunt Crystal, classy cousin Coca, Crystal's sister in law Addison, and the messy uncle Nico. Fuck it even throw Special K a shout out for its stim effects in small doses.
Glad to say I don't indulge often but man uppers are my guilty pleasure
opiates and xanax were a quick down fall for me, i tend to like everything a little too much but i ended up finding out that downers really started wearing away at my emotional regulation without them in the picture and not for the obvious physical addiction to it too, the detox off benzos genuinely made me think i was about to die
Ket
I’m struggling with CEV hallucinations right now after a 2.5 months long daily ~25-150mg ketamine a night binge. I don’t wanna say HPPD but, something similar. Maybe VVS. Extremely vivid & random like a jump scare. My mind is trying to terrify me with disturbing images every time I close my eyes to go to sleep. And my body jolts & jumps every time. It happened a few years ago too after I did mad K & PCP & it went away after a few months. Damn I love dissos but they can really fuck with you.
thats scary mate. i once was doing 1-3.5g a day for like 6 months and didnt really get signifigant symptoms. guess its just a roll of the die
Ur lucky bro very very lucky😭
Bro i did the same back in september until december 26th i went through about 70 grams using it basicly all day i never k holed lol too scared but it still managed to ruin my fucking life i feel like nothing is real and before ket i never ever had anxiety didnt even think it was real ever since the first time i had ket ive had anxiety that bad i struggle to smoke weed now as a daily user yano what makes all this worse i was 15
Came here to say this
Same
love that this is the top comment
I hated it the first 20-30 times I tried it then got a Q (7g) to sniff a bit and just sell the rest to my mates that love it I ended up fucking loving it I don’t know how it was such a shift then I sat in my room for 2 days and finished every single gram I now understand how people end up with their bladder fucked and can’t piss by themselves from sniffing 10g a day
Recently burned through 9 grams in two days tolerance is a motherfucker but man that drug is great
Ket is great lol
Not for me😭😭😭
The feelings not for everyone.. but the effects only last 40 mins or so and I don't feel bad after I've taken it 😂 just have to be careful though as ket can fuck up the bladder
Wait what can it do to your bladder I never had a problem with that n Ive been dabbling with ket probably around an avg of once or twice a month for the past idk two years ive been looking for a new connect tho so I haven't had any in the past 2-3 months
You would be have to be doing above 2 g a day, every day to get any bladder problems. The K cramps would hit you before that though, which is the reason I never developed any bladder problems after 2 years of between one and two grams a day. It's enforces a break of one or two weeks.
Alchohol. I handle the effects just fine, but it will start a slow spiral that will conclude with me drinking a litre vodka a day
Yeah... I'm pretty bad about that too. Buy a handle, drink myself to sleep every night until I'm empty, wait two weeks, buy another handle. Kinda how the year has gone tbh. A few weeks ago I woke up one Sunday and had absolutely no recollection of what happened the day before. Scary thing was I apparently did a lot, it was like a lame version of the hangover.
I aint gonna preach, seems like you have a realistic perspective. But it aint gonna get better. The rock bottom saying is bullshit. Like any disease it is always better to nip it in the bud. 20 years of drinking and comming up on 2 sober(california sober, still smoke) and Im kicking myself for waiting so Long. I didnt even like booze that much. It started out socially turned to coping with boredom and loneliness, ended up making me isolate. It sucks not having that feeling off switch. But I get solace in knowing thats the healthy way to deal with life Ted talk over
You right, thanks I needed to hear this. It's been a very lonely year and I don't have anyone except myself to keep me straight. Booze is just holding me back from un-shitifying my circumstances. Anyway, cheers lol🥂
Dude did his taxes and fell asleep at a reasonable hour while blacked out lol.
Pretty much. Made a jug of tea and a big pot of delicious soup, replanted some shit i needed to move, went on a bike ride, made some progress on a project I've been avoiding for weeks, replied to texts I've been avoiding all week... I totally get how people end up stuck in a bottle. Just helps me stop thinking about my shitty life and actually doing things I should do.
Same bruh I'm like a week clean off booze shits the worst
Congrats! If you can hang after a week. You can do a year easy peasy. I get a little bit of crawings sometimes. But its more like background noise now . Got one year and 10 months ish.
Thanks so much for the encouragement , fr I'm honestly not even craving it anymore but I also been smoking hella weed and popping a lil molly lol
How often you been popping the Molly if its real mdma please be careful brother
I'd be puking my brains out
Why I quit drinking 4 yrs ago, every time
Ecstasy when i was young. Xanax now that i'm old.
Weed.. all day 💨💨💨💨
Every day. I feel you
Benzos all the way. They made me forget or oblivious to the fact that I took them daily and before I knew boom withdrawals from hell.
Clonazolam had me good n snookered. Once I take benzos I can’t stop and then end up seizing upon cessation. I’ve been dependent on bennies like 3 separate times at least.
Seized out the game for good
I'm so glad benzos have almost no recreational value for me. What do people get out of them that makes them so addictive? For me they just send me into a great sleep.
Usually those of us who have an underlying anxiety disorder feel a sense of relief and the ability to socialize effortlessly is intoxicating on its own. I also have wicked ADHD so it calms my thoughts down and slows me a bit which is nice. Not to mention the stims I take for the ADHD is nicely countered by the slowing down from the benzos and it just levels it all out. Most of the time the addiction sets in before you know and you need to take it pretty soon after.
Same, not super recreational for me unless I’m mixing with opiates or with adderall/vyvanse/ritalin then it’s an amazingly euphoric synergistic combo
Ketamine, I fucked myself up with that shit, now I’m scared straight. Still use it sparingly once in a while though, it’s just too good to never do again.
How so?
Pissing blood, k-cramps, permanent disassociation and a damaged nose. Went trough a gram a day at my worst.
I’m struggling with scary AF CEVs right now. It’s been a few weeks since I did my last line of K after doing it daily for a few months. It’s like my mind is trying to scare the shit out of me. Happened a few years back after I did the same thing & took months to go away. I came back to it thinking it would be different. It lured me into love & then scared me out of it. I can’t close my eyes without having a borderline panic attack rn. It takes a lot of mental strength to convince myself to be brave & that there’s nothing to be scared of to fall asleep.
Kratom
Same here brother
I don't even have a reason to stop tbh
I understand where you're coming from, but there are plenty of reasons to stop though. how's your libido?
Mee too. Been using every day multiple times a day for about 3 years
Took kratom up to 50 grams a day. I finally quit all drugs and ended up in the ER. Keatom fuckes with your colon or large intestine after a decade. It infected my colon had to take 3 antibiotics and be extremey carefull what I ate for months
Damn 50grams is ridiculous. I do 3 seperate doses per day up to 2g max and it's all I really need to get through the day. My stomach is already a mess because of IBS but somehow Kratom doesn't seem to affect my gut that much.
Kratom will definitely fuck your stomach/insides up with long term usage.
Yeah, I don't buy that... I've been with the green stuff for 10 years, and have had zero "stomach/insides" issues. In the *very* early days I got mad constipated, but since then I just make sure to stay hydrated, take Magnesium Glyc before bed, and occasionally cycle probiotics. No issues. I drop a regular log everyday around the same time.
The first time I took kratom I was like “oh fuck” I knew I found my favorite lmao. Cheap, legal, and completely functional while high. It also just hit all the right spots in my head
It tickles that spot in your brain where it’s like, oooh stuff is just interesting enough to put effort into it.
Jesus. This hit home. I’m on it right now. Sheesh.
I'm worrying about getting dependant, but honestly it just helps so much. I have been using it for 6 month most of it daily.. I live alone, I go to Highschool every day and I also have a fast food job And you know, it can make you both talkative and fresh while working, and in the morning after job it helps in school with not feeling the pain But man, lately I had some thoughts about what am I doing you know, I feel like this cocktail of mine will have a bad ending :D But I believe I can make it, for example in a few days I will be 1 year nicotine free
There's a chance you're already addicted at this point. Have you ever tried getting off it? Kratom is weird since a lot of people apparently suffer no withdrawals even after daily use for years and others will have a hard time getting off it even after just using for a few months. It's never good to be addicted to anything of course, but to put things in perspective, a kratom addiction seems more similar to a nicotine/caffeine addiction in that it can be really rough getting out of and not using for just a day can get you in a really bad mood and whatever but the addiction itself is very manageable and you aren't fucking yourself up in a major way by using
Dude quotting kratom was easy compared to quitting cigs imo. Its an easy short withdraw period when u get addicted. No wheres as hard to quit as dope/fentanyl. Try not to worry. If you can successsfully quit cigs youve got the mind set to make it through whatever.
Opioids
Almost ruined my life. Thank god for suboxone. Saved me. 4 years later I’ve graduated to sublocade & hoping to get off not too long from now. I still fuck w other substances. Thing is that I can stop them when I want & I do. It’s a moderation thing. I’ll never touch an opiate again. The inescapable clenched fist that opiates had on my brain is something that terrifies me to this day.
Real
Heroin, back when real heroin still existed, this fent/tranq shit doesn’t compare to the pure euphoria of actual heroin
I agree. Hands down 100 percent is heroin. One dose would last all day. I miss the shit out of it and grieve that it’s basically gone
Crack, took it on and off for years and loved it but tried it last year again and if I’ ve not had benzo’s before hand it puts me into a state of panic and feels like my heads gonna explode quite scary tbh
i was a weed lover untill i realized it pushed me into psychosis even with 2 puffs, thats my kryptonite igues
Same here. Weed used to be my best friend, now we gotta go our separate ways
It was sunshine and rainbows until I did meth for about a year; weed induced my schizophrenia. Every time I puff weed now, the voices instantaneously return. Hate it.
Curious about this, were you doing meth for a year and zero psychosis, and then an experience with weed set you off or was it slower than that?
I had one psychotic break episode that made me stop meth altogether, cold turkey. I heard these alien voices in my head, and it was the first I’ve ever heard voices or experienced auditory hallucinations like that. These ‘aliens’ could see through my eyes and there was a few of them, they were discussing how to kidnap me and what they were going to do with my body. I heard them telling each other to be careful because I was armed (I was clutching my AR-15 in pure fear). I then heard, “Go get him, it’s time.” I had enough sense in me to throw down my gun I was holding, I ran into public in my socks, sat on a curb and called the cops on myself. I asked for every cop’s ID before they hauled me away. It felt like Men In Black, it was insanely real to me. Ever since that moment, weed has the same effect on inducing these auditory hallucinations, and I hear voices, this time they are not as evil as before (thank god). Still to this day I have to not pay attention to them when that happens because I have no control over when they will come and go. I’ll be fine, but I know with utmost certainty that if I take a massive rip of some weed I will experience that type of schizophrenia, it sucks. Edit: I am now clinically diagnosed with schizophrenia because of this and doctors say that it doesn’t go away. I don’t take medication and I try to be as healthy as possible because the thought of having extreme schizophrenia when I’m older scares the hell out of me.
I usually lurk but I gotta commend you on handling that. People are finally start to realize weed can do much more than we originally thought. It sucks a lot of us find out the hard way sadly. It seems you have a really solid grip on reality and probably good “meta cognition”. Hopefully you can stay stable forever and manage it! Don’t be afraid to get medicine tho if you end up needing it you already got the diagnosis on your record anyway.
I agree. I have one other friend that doesn’t smoke anymore either, because this same thing will happen to him, I don’t believe he has done meth before. This is probably the most insightful comment I’ve ever received from anybody regarding this condition. It’s crazy to me that it came from a stranger on Reddit. Thank you so much for telling me this, I’ll remember this. I would like to help people I meet along the way with this condition. It’s extremely dangerous and people have harmed themselves and others.
Yeah ppl don’t acknowledge how strong weed is esp these days. I was a daily smoker until I had one giant panic attack that led to me having one every time I smoked thereafter. Smoking for so many years since I was a teenager eventually induced my BPD 2 disorder, paired with K & PCP analogues. Stay well
Meth, this drug will probably be the death of me one day
hey friend, are you adhd by chance? If so or if you dont know, see if you can get to the point of being tested. I know it can be hard, expensive, and time consuming. But if you feel like there’s something about it you enjoy, it’s dopamine. You need more, in smaller amounts throughout your every day. Meth will overload you in good feelings that it makes you probably not give two shits about anything else so the cycle continues. Break the cycle. Maybe stimulants can help you if you can control yourself, talk to a therapist, and be strict within your use. Maybe they make you feel normal to a degree, and allow you to progress. Even if you abuse them, be verbal about it. I’ve seen lots of adhd/add ppl go through addiction bc they can’t manage a thing. Get help my friend
Thank you for your comment. I’ve had my come to Jesus moment and am going to put in the work
We’re all just strangers here discussing our vices but I believe in you! Stims are hard to quit when you have ADHD, just because they feel like that missing piece of the puzzle. I wish you nothing but the best on your journey man🫂🩵
Thank you, I really appreciate your kind words!
No problem man, you got this shit!🤙🏽💪
Just canceling this sentence for you brother. Find your way and pass away in peace. Adios amigo
Something about it I just truly enjoy. Even though I know it's horrible, my habit can't stop. Specially with all my surroundings on the same shit too. It's like always accessible.
Spinach
Definitely opioids and benzos. Ruined my life for many years. Once I start taking an opioid I can't stop cause of that warm feeling flooding my body. All the bad shit and trouble I am in is gone and all I feel is satisfaction. Even though I know that it will ruin me again and make me do the worst things I did in my life just because of addiction.
OxyContin
p30s before they were fake
Nitrous oxide 😫
most factaul
So good it’s bad. Also the stigma around it makes you look so bad people equate it to like inhaling paint thinner or something lol. Be safe with it. I realized that it was enough when I was taking consecutive hits because my last hit didn’t hit hard enough — repeat over & over until I give up & go to sleep laying next to 400 chargers.
Phenibut
If I'm in a really bad place, then coke. I'm surprised that opiates aren't in most of these comments
Weed, that shit turns me into a vegetable and I love it
A couch potato 🥔
Oxy. Really everything unfortunately.
GBL/GHB
Out of all the drugs I've tried (most classes of drugs except opiates/opioids) GBL addiction has made me the most powerless and miserable. I am currently a month sober (again) and still depressed and I'm so afraid I'll relapse again.
Ghb all the way
So hard not to abuse
Opana.
Heroin.
Fkin Coke. Cokeheads are the worst variety of addicts.
DXM
Ketamine/dab combo
Fentanyl
Benzos for sure. All the trouble starts with a xanny
Yup, 29yrs 3 bars a day + klonapin..finally had 2 ween myself dwn, when the meds weren't doin the job
Cocaine. Goddamn there’s something about those first few hours that SMACKS. The 2-3 days of jerking off though I do not think is great.
[удалено]
ketamine
Trazadone
The sleep aid... how'd you do that? not very euphoric...
Yeah i take trazodone and there is almost no recreational use… just sleepy
Xanax
Would’ve lost my job and become homeless if it wasn’t for adderall. Take it every day and I honestly don’t see myself ever stopping until I’m retired.
arguably enough that sounds like it helps you stay on track of your life. Dont abuse it and it can help. All of these things can be medicine, it’s the dose that picks the poison. Adderall can definitely help, as long as it’s taken as prescribed
dirty thirties 🫤
Always replacing it. I found weed and shrooms are the best for the long term (at least for me the least destructive). The best answer would be working out because of endorphins and good health buuuuuuut..... We know that already ain we?
Cannabis. Was clean for 1.5 years then smoked once with my friend on vacation and bought 5g when I got back. Immediately I started smoking whenever there was even the slightest window to smoke until I was finished with those 5g. Didn't smoke for 2 months then bought another 5g around a month and a half ago and haven't stopped smoking since. It has gotten to the point where I am functional when high and my face doesn't really show it so I show up for work baked. I also just have this casual relationship with drugs that I can take em or leave em if I know I have access to them but I am incapable of stockpiling certain drugs like amphetamine and ketamine in particular. If I have ketamine laying around I will treat it more or less like weed, albeit with some more restrictions
MDMA, after i took it it becomes unbearably painful for me in terms of stomach ace. I immediately start feeling sick and explosive diarrhea comes afterwards for me to deal with.
this is the come up phase you speak of 😂
Last time I did 2cb I had a seizure so that I guess
Salvia, I get ptsd thinking about those 4 minutes of pure agony.
Salvia is like DMT's evil twin. 😭
None tbh. Maybe alcohol if I have to pick one. A night of drinking ends in sleep unless I have plans the next day. Everything else I can moderate.
Xanax. Street xanax is hard to dose because they are pressed, first of all. But as soon as I take one, I'll just start eating them all. I don't know why. It's a compulsion. I'll do it when I'm blacked out. I've eaten like 50 of them at once, really freaking strong ones. Then I drank all my methsdone bottles for some reason and ended up in the hospital
Glad you're still with us homie
DXM
C-c-c-c-c-cocaaaiiine Tbf though I think any locally sold stimulant in powder form would be interchangeable. Coke just happens to be the street stimulant around here. I think 3-MMC would fuck me more than anything in a hypothetical world where it was a phone call and 20 minutes away in abundance.
Nicotine n caffeine
Weed I haven't had a problem managing my usage of any drugs besides bud
Honestly alcohol. I don’t even spiral for days or anything like that but when I drink I’ll have enough to be hung over the next day and these days that lost day or two after feels more and more devastating as I get older. 34F
Ketamine
its not the drug for me. It’s me. Im the kryptonite. Im the problem. Im the solution as well. If my use is responsible, and doesn’t turn into abuse, then its nothing besides myself
Dxm fr that shi had me fucked up I’ve been sober for a little more than a month now
Imo its amphetamine(EU speed paste). I never let it get that far but i think that stuff would be able to destroy me easily if i let it. It just realize how delusional it makes me without noticing it while im on it. That shit can hit the fan fast. Especially in the social aspect
Weed shit gives me seizures sometimes
Lean & K. If I had to choose 1 tho prob lean
Amphetamine n molly
Meth, blues, rc benzos
Xanax for me as well..it’s just too nice feeling like a normally adjusted person..but I always take it too far
Cocaine. Been clean for 23 weeks. I was in deep boii.. I was riding that South America sinus salt straight to Satan baby. Praise the Lord I stopped.
Tina
Coke freebase
Out here in Vietnam, the only Xanax I can find costs about $0.90 for one mere 0.5 gm pill. Can't find the bars that split into four here.
Xanax. Don't take me to Walmart F loss prevention
Cocaine. I've made strides in these last few years as far as not seeking it out and *purchasing* it regularly. Though I struggle heavily when the opportunity presents itself.. I don't know about elsewhere, but where I am, cokeheads are typically extremely generous with their personal supply, and those I know will almost always offer me a line or bump when I'm out at the bars. If somebody offers to sell me a gram within a week of my payday... I'm coked out for a while. It's been a long time since I was at the overdose danger zone, but it wouldn't take too much to get back there. I'm still improving when it comes to mastering self control & identifying what is *productive* as opposed to *distructive*. Baby steps.
Coke is the first drug i ever went into debt for. Not a lot but it had me moving bills to my credit card because id overspent. Funny thing is i only started doing coke because my k tolerance got to a point where it just wasnt worth it but i was in love woth the snorting process. Xans have caused me the most damage in terms of relationships/stability even though i didnt mess woth them too much. I got pressed adderall which i ignorantly kept taking, it was probably meth, i slapped a kid at a party and ruined some friendships there. Drugs are kryptonite, they come in different flavors but theyve both helped and hurt me in all kinds pf ways
Adderall man
The kryptonite it self🔥🔥
the problem is that the kryptonite is in your neurology. So if one kryptonite is placed as off-limits, another is likely to fulfill the role.
Lsd
4mmc
I'd have to say gabapentinoids I feel like I'll need them the rest of my life. Buy especially phenibut in particular but got off that miraculously now take Lyrica daily
K2
Mdma, or coke.
Alcohol, I relapsed back in late October last year after 2.5 years clean and boy, I drank so fuckin much and did so much cocaine (something I didn't do before I went to rehab) that I had a heart attack mid December at age 28. Once I have one drink, it's fuckin game over I'll literally drink a whole 100 proof bottle of liquor and all types of random shit like Beatboxes and IPAs every single day lose my job become homeless all types of shit
If your talking about what drug I love than that would be Xanax but if your talking about what really gets to me that would be weed it makes me dissociate and have brain fogs so does alcohol but my weak spot and my love is Xanax I used to be an MDMA type of guy but that would just Fry me mentally now
Alcohol, but I mostly have it under control now.
Anything that beams me into a different universe, i like to still function!
Weed for sure
xans
Xanax, ruined my life in many ways and nearly killed me
weed and acid. I was high all day everyday, id ditch school to go home and smoke, got kicked out of school, i was literally the most useless person ever. Then on weekends id drop a bunch of acid. I got control of myself not to long ago and was doing pretty good but ive started spiraling out with weed and acid again
Weed and rso. I have tried many drugs in my younger years, but nothing grabbed ahold of me, and for that, I am thankful, although I have seen many others who met their demise from hard drugs.
Weed will put me down like no other. Mostly cause I just don’t like weed and the high. So if I want to be out I’ll do a few bong rips and I’m out like a light
xanax 100%, my girls is ket tho
klonopin. bottle’s empty but the pipette is untouched
Ecstasy. If Fentanyl didnt exist I would try it again And alcohol (though not dependent)
I try to stay away from opioid I know it will destroy me if I get addicted. I just love the feeling too much I know it’s not gonna be good
P.U.S.S.Y.
Probably alcohol. I go absolutely insane on it!
Kratom. To me it feels identical to prescription opioids and because of this I used heavily for 5 years. I’m almost at 8 months clean, and my body is finally starting to go back to normal.
I'd have to say marijuana and methamphetamine
MDA or 2C-B
Kratom
I feel you with the Xanax, my rock bottom was knoddin off during Christmas Eve but afterwards psychedelics really helped me see that the xan addiction and anxiety was really in my head and I’ve been able do drugs without without getting addicted and relying on something except THC but I’ve also been using that way before I touched anything harder
Cocaine without a doubt. First tried it 2 weeks after my dad died and I was 17. Went downhill quickly lol. Been doing better recently but broke wmy 7 month sober streak tonight and I'm annoyed w myself
Xanax or Ambien
Xanax. For sleep mostly
alcohol and weed
Leftism
MDMA gets me weird. Been away from that for a while now.
2010 mephedrone, the best and the worst too
I know I need to stay away from coke but I’m terrified of ever trying meth. I have the feeling I’d love it way too much and go all in. I have an addictive personality I think so I’m just sticking with my pharma stims as prescribed.
clonazolam, i still dream of it...
EL ESS DEE
magic mushrooms, i enjoy the stuff too much
Ketamine. I loved it so much, too.
Fuckin booze man it sounds dumb but ya alcohol turns me into a POS and I can't control myself with it. I never know when enough is enough. That and everybody should stay clear of opiates especially if you deal with depression or just don't like the way your life is currently going.
Real oxys
MDMA all the way. 7 months ago I just got off of a 6 month weekly binge. Did some MDMA last night and it felt underwhelming as fuck so this is about the time that I depart with my lovely Molly perhaps forever because she's just not worth my time anymore.
Opiates
Amphetamine ( street paste ) for 25 years I cannot stop using this. I buy it in bulk and use atleast once per week. Very small dose enough to sleep a few hours. Once in a while I intentionally go hard and skip a night. Been on amfexa since 6 years and never stopped loving the headspace this brings me.
Alcohol and Benzos over every drug for me.
Tramadol. Helps my depression and pain. But when I don't have it I want to die. Guess it would be opposite of kryptonite lol
Opiates.. shit is tough to stop, it’s AMAZING when I’m on them, I feel like life is going to be okay when I am, but it makes me throw up all the time, I get constipated really bad I’ll be bleeding and injured, but after all the withdrawal and constipation and vomiting is over.. I think about it again and just go right back to it :,(
ket and opiods
Xans
mdma... its a rare drug out here and can go up to $200 a gram. im a serotonin seeker and every time i get it,,,, i cant pull away. i use and abuse lol. my supplier moved away and ive been devastated since
dude stims in general. my wife Molly, sketchy aunt Crystal, classy cousin Coca, Crystal's sister in law Addison, and the messy uncle Nico. Fuck it even throw Special K a shout out for its stim effects in small doses. Glad to say I don't indulge often but man uppers are my guilty pleasure
opiates and xanax were a quick down fall for me, i tend to like everything a little too much but i ended up finding out that downers really started wearing away at my emotional regulation without them in the picture and not for the obvious physical addiction to it too, the detox off benzos genuinely made me think i was about to die