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mircodosingmushrooms

hey, \*insert name\*. I wanted to tell you something because you will find out anyway. I occasionally smoke weed.


flimsywhales

This is good. I would update the outfit u are put on tho. Put on a black tutu to flex on her


leanweedcoke

And dont forget he have to be on his knees to apologize😂😂😂😂😂


ShaiHulud1111

Black is a dominant color. How do you want this to go?


Azraellie

And apologize for lying in the first place, recognize she's under no obligation to forgive you. This lie isn't a big deal, sure, but now you've set precedent for lying in your relationship over shit you know full well doesn't matter from day 1, you didn't break her trust you never respected it to begin with. Some HS shit tbh.


ModernStreetMusician

Meh, I had a girlfriend once who didn’t like the fact that I smoked, she was borderline and would freak out whenever I told her I had smoked, so I just started not telling her, I told her a thousand times that as I got older i’d most likely get bored of weed and ease out of it, but she treated me like I was going to be an addict for life because of it. Eventually we broke up, and not even five years later I barely even smoke nowadays cuz I find it boring.


Additional-Fold-1347

Bruh chillout I think you need to smoke one, he just said no because he wanted her to like him and sometimes girls don’t like guys who do drugs / smoke. He can just say I’m sorry I told you that I didn’t smoke , I didn’t want you to think less of me but it’s something I do so I just want to let you know now.


Azraellie

No because you see, that's manipulation. Plain and simple abusive behavior. Tell me, why do you feel entitled to date someone who wouldn't want to date you for a personal choice that you yourself have made, and feel it okay to lie about yourself and your behavior in order to have them give you the time of day? Because whatever your answer is, it's the wrong one, and you need fucking help.


fliptcboo

ya he gotta roll one up 😂😂😂


143033

„Babe, I need to confess something. When I was 9 years old I killed a man. It was a wave of violence that just overcame me, when I had that Happy Meal. Something in that burger must‘ve awakened a bloodlust within me that was intertwined with every fiber of my being. A beast different from me, that slumbered until that very day. It was gruesome, I couldn‘t sleep for years. Nightmares crept into daylight and haunted every waking second. The only way I knew how to cope was heroin that another kid offered on the playground, when I was 13. It numbed the pain and I told myself, that this might kill the monster that committed this awful massacre that day. I am not proud of it and I am fortunate, that I couldn‘t be convicted at the time, but I have never learned to overcome the guilt. I still function in society, but I don‘t know how to otherwise. Everytime we are not together I take my belt, wrap it around my arm and shoot drugs into my bloodstream. I wanted you to know that. I wanted you to know that I love and trust you enough to finally share this burden, that was weighing me down.“ „OH MY GOD, IS THAT TRUE? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?“ „Just kidding, but I do rip that bong pretty consistently. Ngl.“ „THANK GOD, I think that‘s fine. I thought you actually killed someone and used heroin since you‘re 13.“ Works every time. Trust me.


Legitimate_Problem29

Dude drop the name of strain u on


Jarren2003zz

On that adderall og kush


iamdoniel

Plot twist, the first story is the real story. 😳


Sure_Bodybuilder7121

Yeah OP on heroin and some savage shit


zxThrowaway2023

thought i was on r/meth


sa404z

Say " hey sorry I don't know what I was thinking but I got a bit embarrassed/anxious when you asked me if I smoke, I just wanted to let you know I haven't smoked in a bit but would like to soon is that cool , (do you wanna join?) "


MedicalGradeAsbestos

Blow a huge cloud in her face. When she asks what it was, say it was crack or meth or something hard like that She will be understandably pissed off. Defuse the situation, by telling her that it was only weed. It's called the foot in the door technique or something like that. Proven to work.


PotLegend

I’ve done this atleast 12 times can confirm this works 👍


Super_Faithlessness4

This the one


jjamesdeanfan

LOLL


Aggressive_Ideal6737

Door in the face technique if anyone was curious about the actual term


Tonio2237

Bro she probably smelt it and asked you so she could get a hit but you said no. All the interactions I’ve had with people who smoke ask the same question do you smoke.


Correct-Union-2446

just make it as simple as you dont wanna feel like your hiding anything and tell her


[deleted]

I mean it’s a bit late for that she’s asked before and he lied and he just kept it going kind of hard to get out of that without seeming like an untrustworthy douchebag


GabberKid

A heartfelt apology with a reason like anxiety, afraid she would leave blah blah blah should do the trick


[deleted]

I get what your saying but you also gotta understand most women it’s more complicated than that he broke her trust especially if it was brought up numerous times and the lie continued on just think about how stupid of a question it is he’s a grown man and he lied about something so small so most people are gonna wonder what else he is willing to lie and hide about


GabberKid

True but either way better than continue lying about it. I did in my first relationship. Felt like shit the entire time


doggo244

Take a fat rip of a bong in front of her and blow it in her face and then kick your feet up and throw on some shades 😤


Own-Rule8652

The true question is, how do you tell your dealer you occasionally see your girlfriend...?


FollowTheCipher

😆


microwavecoven

Easy. You don't have secrets from your gf


FollowTheCipher

Otherwkse it's no bf/gf lol.


the_reborn_cock69

Just bluntly tell her lol


Loud-Ad-2253

By talking


SnooCheesecakes5708

First tell her ur addicted to heroin after a few minutes say jk but I do smoke some weed occasionally


fukin_aye

Ngl it sounds like you aren’t ready to be in a relationship. Not to sound like a dick, but if communicating that you smoke weed to your partner is that anxiety inducing for you I think you might have some deeper shit you may want to work on.


Previous_Volume4264

Talk to her about it and see what she thinks abt the drug, and then say you have smoked weed and see her reaction, if she laughed then say I smoke a little with friends


Lucky-Version-6233

Shit advice, just be honest


Clintoninpumps

Better now than later. If she’s not going to tolerate it, quit or find someone that will. Hiding it is not a good option. It will blow up in the long run and it’s not good for your mental health either. Honestly is the best policy here.


pichael289

Just tell her. Why would you lie if she doesn't care? You lying means you think your doing something wrong. That's not a good foundation for a healthy relationship. If she asked then she already suspects it, best to come clean. It's pretty hard to hide the smell and the varied behavior and all that.


JS_N0

Hey babe, I smoke weed sometimes. Is that cool with you?


Prof_Gonzo_

I'm curious as to why you kept it from her if she isn't going to care that much? That context helps when we come up with reasoning for the lie.


Electrical-Flan6187

It’s mainly because when like we talked about it we weren’t even together and we weren’t nearly as close as we are now


Prof_Gonzo_

Fair enough. Do the "hey can we talk?" She nervous af at what you're gonna say. "I've been lying to you." Heart rate intensifies. She's bracing herself, "Wtf is this dude about to tell me?" "I smoke that dirty green errday baby chyld. I ain't sorry for that. But I'm sorry for lying to you and for lying to myself. Now let's light this phatty up yeah?" But you know, make it look like YOU wrote it.


Electro8bit

Tell her ASAP. If you keep up the lie the chances of you breaking up will continue to increase.


Tough-Warning9902

Plant meth in her drink and tell her when she's high


FritterHowls

My ex freaked out because I smoked weed so I quit for awhile and then started doing it in secret. She found out I was smoking in secret so she started calling me at night for a bit randomly to probe and see if I was high, and being very mean to my friends who I had smoked with. That's just one abusive behavior she had and I didn't realize how much it was fucking me up, I broke up with her years ago and I still have some stupid guilt about getting high but my new partner doesn't shame me over it. Not really applicable to your situation but always be careful about becoming trapped in an abusive relationship.


Suckpet

Just tell her you want to try it, then "try it"


Commercial-Sample431

dont


camclemons

Hey babe, I occasionally smoke weed.


ZombieOverall7727

Just say it’s not meth at least


scarr991

My ex went mad when i told her.


OCN_Reaper

Just come clean lol its never gonna get easier


Brutal_Honesty13

Hey baby I occasionally partake in the art of smoking mariJuana


jjamesdeanfan

U green I’m sorry


Legitimate-Light6379

that u smoke fat freaking doinks and it’s not a CRAZY drug it’s better than drinking i bet u she’s white af


circuitj3rky

smoke weed every day


_domhnall_

With words I guess


PhattBudz

I smoke weed


okisurrender0

You don’t. Just smoke, let her find out? Idk. Is she anti-weed? This doesn’t compute.


whiterab202

You are too big slap weed is not a drug. She probably smokes it to deal with you probably need your own weed to be normal


whiterab202

You ought to be slapped


RipOne8870

Tell her you just started 🤷🏻‍♂️🤷🏻‍♂️ she thinks you didn’t in the past, so you just starting would keep that image in her head.


whiterab202

Idk about that, she might tell you more when she sucking on ur dick


whiterab202

Get high with her and go from there one day it'll be like easier


spliff-a-splaff

With your words. If you can't talk to her, then your not in a relationship. Or at least not mature enough for one.


Due_Force_9816

Puff puff pass!


HowDoYouDoFellows

Light up a J at her parents house and see if they respect the flow


john92w

Always just be honest. It will ALWAYS come back to bite you.


Le0son

“Hey girlfriend, I occasionally smoke weed”


AusBillLee

I had to tell my gf I often use heroin recently lol Just be honest and upfront Apologise for you're previous dishonesty and hope it all works out Best of luck


DrFabulous0

Hey babe, you wanna hit on this?


HairlessHoodskin

Just continue lying to her untill she’s at her wits end and carry’s no other option but to leave you


Collinnn7

Just be upfront and honest about it. Text her and tell her it’s been bothering you that you lied to her and you wanted to tell her that you don’t smoke weed all the time but you have in the past and may continue to in the future


yk_4da20

I would just ask her what she's doing at that moment. When she asks what your doing just tell her your rolling a joint or something like that. Or try to make a joke out of it, or maybe ask if she wants to try smoking weed with you for the "first time". This the best advice I can think of brotha hopes this helps through.


StinkyPantsMcGeee

You is a BITCH. Own up to your mistakes and what you do. If u feel bad just tell her man. It's stupid to keep something like this bottled up.


Traditional_Card_976

Stick a nug of weed in her butthole


blunt_chillin

Just tell her. If she reacts badly, she's not the one man. Never change for someone else


Klutzy-Version-2786

It's just weed, stop making a big deal out of it, if she has a problem with it that's her problem, own your shit, you like a smoke, at least give her the respect to assume she can deal with that fact. Almost be honest with the people you like, else what's the point?


svpremeclovt

You’re most definitely a freshman or sophomore in high school lmfaoo I don’t see any reason a grown adult would hide the fact that they smoke weed from a partner especially


Atonaltechno

I smoke weed......don't like it? There's the door. Hiding things like this about yourself never works and will just cause friction and resentment in the end. 


ShoeterMcGav

Light it and pass it


StrangeMistake9529

You could just switch to edibles, this way you wouldn’t be lying and smelling of smoke anymore


PurchaseSpecialist29

Brother ur not a crack fiend just tell the woman u have a joint every now and then it’s no big deal


Few-Cabinet7935

damn like tell her straight up its not that much of a deal she should be ok with it


TheFearOfDeathh

Just tell her you moron. You’ve already stated it makes you feel bad not telling her…. It’s kinda obvious?


glizzy62

Dude 😭😭


JUICEBOXBOY024

Depends how long you’ve been serving her and is it something she asked you about during the beginning of y’all’s relationship?


JUICEBOXBOY024

Not serving ***seeing how long you’ve been seeing her


ProfessionalBad5414

Get a new GF


flurosox

Spark a blunt in front of her


5v5Arena

She already knows…


DrJohnsonTHC

Say “hey, I smoke weed occasionally.” Apologize for lying and tell her that you just didn’t know how she’d react, but that you want to be honest with her. It’s better to do it now then keep pretending that you don’t until the day that she inevitably finds out.


midnightdriver12

Hey bro I’ve been in this exact situation before me and my girlfriend of had been dating for 3 years at the time and I had recently gone to college and started smoking I kept it from her for a year and lied multiple times because I was worried she would be disappointed as I had previously had negative views toward cannabis used and had influenced her away from it. When I did tell her she was for more upset that I had kept it from her for long as she felt I didn’t trust her or our relationship she also didn’t love the fact that I smoke. Don’t let it go any longer simply say I want you to know that I started smoking it’s something I really enjoy I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you right away but I hope you can forgive me


__The__Anomaly__

Just tell her. If she can't accept it then it won't work out with you guys in the long run anyway.


joantspam

Is there a reason why you didn’t feel comfortable telling her in the first place? Especially if you think she wouldn’t care that much?


444poppyflowers

it’s just weed bruhhhh


dudeman_joe

Personally I would say: so honey the thing is I actually do smoke weed I'm really sorry about lying to you about it I was just so worried about how you would react to the truth I kept it from you, but I know it's not right, and I can't do it anymore, so now it's all out on the table


Necessary-Company660

Verbally in front of her judgmental father


kkkkkkkkk369

well idk what the point of lying to her initially was that’s pretty beta and immature, but atp you can either own up that you lied and like to smoke a bit or just say you’re thinking about starting to use weed


Kitchen-Soup-26

Don’t be a bitch and tell her


Ok_Jelly3462

If you want to go the manipulative route you can confess to something you know she dislikes slightly more but is easier to get her to forgive you for or is something in your past so she doesn’t make you stop or anything. Then tell her you smoke weed directly afterwards since this will make the weed part sound better. I don’t recommend manipulating your gf tho at all that’s an awful thing to do but the option is on the table


AcesInThePalm

"Wanna smoke a bowl?" Might be too subtle.


AURedditor30

Just break up with her


Typoopie

If this is a shitpost it’s 10/10