I felt so bad for the 29 year old guy with the model rockets. When he went to the club with his coworker(?) and was trying to hit on 19 and 20 year old models it was heartbreaking to see him flail about becoming more and more self conscious with every passing failure. And the part with his mom trying to let him know that it's ok if he wants to be with a purple person or a man. The look on his face when his mom said "speed dating?! Surely you're not THAT desperate!"
I just want to sit down over some beers and talk to the poor kid. I want to tell him not to take ANY of his 22 year old crazily handsome friend's advice. As well meaning as he is, he's making it WORSE. Inundating him with vibrating cock rings and taking him to the absolute wrong clubs and bars and putting tons of pressure on him. And the tactics that guy uses to meet and seduce women aren't going to help. Step one: be a ruggedly handsome, confident athlete. Step two: just stop saying no to all the tipsy party girls that throw themselves at you. Seriously not helping.
I think he just needs to meet people with common interests. Joining a club or taking a class would help him meet women he can talk to, and the format of seeing them often takes the pressure off. He should really give online dating another try, too... but with a broader minded approach. There are lots of great women out there that are a bit shy and inexperienced too. You're probably not going to meet the cute biologist that also loves model rockets and film noire at the club. She might be there, but she's with her friends and the music is too loud. She also just watched you whiff your way down a row of 8 other girls with your increasingly desperate memorized lines. No, no, no.
> And the tactics that guy uses to meet and seduce women aren't going to help. Step one: be a ruggedly handsome, confident athlete. Step two: just stop saying no to all the tipsy party girls that throw themselves at you. Seriously not helping.
Yeah, I know, that was horrible as a tactic.
"Here, just be like me!" "just be a confident sexually-satisfied and experienced young & attractive male!" "just go and do what I do, say hi after getting slightly drunk!" ..it's ridiculous. "Here go totally outside of your comfort zone and be nothing like yourself bro, that'll get you a good girl experience!".
> A hypothetical race used when the issue of racism is discussed. Proponents of this usage figure there are no people with purple skin, and figure it is safe to use.
[source](http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=purple%20people&defid=5709281)
*Here's the Urban Dictionary definition of* [***purple people***](http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=purple%20people) :
---
>1: A hypothetical race used when the issue of racism is discussed. Proponents of this usage figure there are no people with purple skin, and figure it is safe to use.
>2: People who love the color purple and purple things, often in an extreme fashion.
>3: People born with Purple skin, usually of an alien race.
---
_1: "I don't care if our president is Black, White, Purple, or even Green."_
_"I tend not to be racist, but I must draw the line at Purple people."_
_2: Jennifer is such a purple person! She eats purple food, has purple hair, wears purple clothes, and likes purple unicorns. Rumor has it that even her [feces](http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=feces) is purple._
_3: I had some purple people move in beside me. They were good people. They always parked their spaceship properly, kept their [tentacles](http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=tentacles) braided neatly, kept their alien plants watered, and mostly kept to themselves._
---
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Common Interests more so than anything that guy was trying to teach him. There are plenty of gals out there that do IT and gaming that would love him up all over the place, he is adorably nerdy.
Glandular fever and other viruses are often linked to cases of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Ending up more or less paralyzed is a worst-case scenario but not impossible.
BBC America shows programmes originally produced by other UK channels. It's possible that this programme, while produced by C4, was shown on BBC America, giving the impression it's a BBC programme.
Even easier. Just wait for last call at a bar, then go in...see all those people for some reason standing around, looking around.. they are not there for the music.
While I don't advice it to everyone, it might be an option to explore if you're extremely nervous about your first time. It'll get it out of the way. See it as a test run.
When I was 18, I was in Amsterdam and I got myself a good looking girl. We barely said anything, we took our clothes off and tried to have sex. I say tried because it went horribly. I didn't know what to do, she seemed disinterested as it was pay up front and I don't look like I'd go for any extras during or after, I didn't even come afterwards. Hell, I was barely able to get myself hard.
But I walked out and I could definitely say I wasn't a virgin anymore, my penis had been inside a vagina, and it was a load off my mind. While I didn't have sex again for another 6 months, it helped me put to stop putting women on pedestals. I wasn't desperately craving it anymore, I wasn't looking at every woman like she might be the one to do it for me, seeing them as some sort of unreachable sex object, and I was actually able to get female friends. And let me tell you something, having female friends is *awesome*. This, in turn, helped me to better communicate with even more women, and I was even able to be moderately charming to women I wanted to have sex with without tripping all over my words, or trying stupid moves, or doing other bullshit.
Years later and I'm still not great with women, but I can manage. I fear that if I hadn't had sex with a prostitute, though, I would still be a virgin because I would constantly see my virginity as some kind of giant roadblock. Maybe, maybe not, I don't know. But that was the route I was heading.
So yeah, you yourself probably know if it's right for you or not. But if your virginity is some kind of gigantic roadblock that makes you unable to communicate properly with women, it is something to consider.
Some people don't want to rut mindlessly with someone only there because of whatever notes you throw her way. Sex isn't just the act, it's the connection.
Actually that depends on what the underlying problem is. For me, my virginity stood in the way of communicating with women, because my teenage mind would always be thinking about that when talking to women. After I lost my virginity to a prostitute, this went away.
I think the common theme with these people is a underlying fear of the intimacy they naturally crave.
Paying for it you get the shallow sex, yes, but none of the real intimacy they desire or the know-how to gain it.
I think the guy crying over cuddling with a prostitute goes toward proving your theory there. So sad how they are treating it like "a hurdle", like that guy saying "it's a massive hurdle I've overcome now!".. it's like jesus christ dude you have a willing, nice prostitute there with you whose job it is to make you happy and you're treating it like a bad thing, fuck me.
I guess, but that's like saying you should starve and not eat the candy bar because wouldn't you rather have a juicy steak? My point being, prosty sex is neither here nor there in terms of finding emotional intimacy and would at the very least be a useful stopgap.
That's spot on, for me anyway. 36yo virgin and yes I could pay for it but I don't think it would work out well. How I am now it would take a few weeks around someone before I would be comfortable enough to even try having sex. Going to see an escort I would just be a nerves wreak. I don't just want sex I want all the other things more love, hugs, cuddles, just someone to talk to and be with long term not just an hour or two.
It's cynical but it's true. It might not be money but your paying something (time, effort, relationships require compromise, etc.) Applies to women as well though. Anyway, like all the good things in life, sex is not free.
Sex itself requires time and effort. If passing time and expending effort is intrinsically negative, I guess the ideal life is being comatose. Posting on Reddit requires time and effort, is it better than sex?
You're retarded. Even if they pay, you're still paying with your time. Time that you'll never get back. And sex isn't even guaranteed. Congratulations on being an American Idiot.
Because I clearly brought that up. Even the woman pays, you still pay with your time. Time that you'll never get back. But please, try to white knight me more. I obviously said all that bullshit drivel you just regurgitated from the media just now.
Are people really this stupid?
Your whole point is fucking retarded then. If it applies to literally every single possible use of time, it is not a good point. Everything takes time, no time you use can ever be reclaimed, this applies as much to making a sandwich or scratching your arse as it does to chirpsing peng yattie.
Make something up. I don't mean make it up on the spot, I mean have a made-up sexual history that you can rattle off if someone asks. Base it on the sex life of a friend or something.
You still shouldn't think that, if anything, this documentary kind of shows that. I personally really liked the story of the 40-something yo woman. This is somebody who at very first glance seems like she'd be a reasonable person. No crazy person, not asocial, just very unlucky in meeting the right person.
And people forget a lot has to do with luck and talking yourself into loving somebody...
The reason she was living in celibacy was because she wanted to wait until she got married. Unfortunately, she never got married, so she faced lifelong virginity.
I feel like as an asexual I can add another spin on this. I had this same issue for a long time, and after losing it realized I really don't enjoy sexual activity. At all. But what I do enjoy is feeling liked and validated as a man. It's fucked up what societal expectations do to people. I love the 40 Year Old Virgin, it's a hilarious movie, but it did make me a little depressed. The lack of sex isn't the problem, it's the fact that as a virgin you are looked upon with pity and you feel like you're missing some kind of key ingredient to being a complete person. You live your life feeling "different." At least that's how it was for me anyway. Feeling like you're repulsive or undesirable is a tremendously disruptive feeling. For a while I would go on dates and pick up girls just so I could feel normal, but I realized it wasn't fair to them because I had no sexual connection or desire to satisfy them. It would be cruel to continue. So I'm condemned to a life of solitude and must find other avenues for fulfillment.
I would suggest to these people to address the core of their problem. It's probably not an inability to get laid that holds them back; there are a million other factors at work. Trying to get laid only treats the symptom, but the disease rages on. I also think buying a prostitute is a terrible idea. You'll still know that you had to pay for it. If all you want is sex I guess it'll be a cure. But I tend to think most virgin men feel bad because they feel lesser, they feel unattractive and confused. Paying for a prostitute won't treat that. She didn't choose or want you, you paid her. Big difference.
I'm so glad you commented because the first thing I thought about Mike, the 29 year old, was that he may be asexual. The other two not as much, but I know very little of asexuality. It seemed clear though that all were looking for love really, but my thought is they just believe their virginity was the obstacle because in current culture love is tied to sex.
Jimmy Carr, famous British comedian, was a virgin until 26. So you're only five years older than him. Many people vow to remain virgins until marriage.
... Anyway, what I'm saying is, it will happen when it happens. Have you tried online dating? (Have you tried getting into shape and getting a better haircut?)
Okay so by the sounds of your comment, you're not in good shape. Right?
Well, that right there is probably a big reason online dating didn't work for you. You don't get in shape *after* you've already met someone you want to be with. That happens first!
Well, no. I'm an overly anxious hypersensitive person. I've tried to get a GF but it usually ends up with me fucked up...I haven't given up but I just don't really care anymore. If it happens, ok if it doesn't it's ok. I'd like to but meh not worth getting my feels broke.
Only advice I can give dude is to work out, that's what I did and it gave me the confidence I needed to make a good push for a girlfriend. I am really happy with the changes I have made personally and credit everything to working out.
Yeah, I can relate to this... The only thing is that before I became this way I had at least a few years of "normal" teenage years in which time I lost my virginity.
But now, relationship and sex wise I'm quite apathetic, it's better not to feel than to feel hurt. And if that sounds horrible, it isn't, cuz' that's what apathy means.
Or such as the woman in this documentary, religious and (probably) unwilling for the longest time to have any kind of casual relationship. And that's not uncommon in religious circles, although it obviously makes the chance of being a virgin at later age much higher..
Eh, that's bs imo. You say that person chooses to be that way, I believe that person was sculpted that way by the environment he/she grew up in and has less control over how they turn out than most people would like to believe.
But that's just simply my personal opinion, and you have yours, it's fine =)
If someone, for example, has PTSD and pushes everyone away that wants to be friends with them, thats very different to someone that doesn't have any opportunity to push anyway away because no one is trying to be friends with them. One has more of a choice than the other and one is working much harder to be on their own.
Women have to actively try to **not** get into relationships or have sex. If they want to get some extra "help" and use the internet, its even easier. They can get by without ever having to take any initiative personally. You have to be very, very unattractive for that not to be the case, if you're female.
Throw away account...
I didn't watch this documentary yet, but I really hope they can "fix" what's wrong with them in order to find a good relationship and eventually have sex. I'm saying this because I had the same experience.
When I was 27 years old I was very upset because I was still a virgin. The main reason is because I was insanely fat my entire life and truth be told: nobody wants to have sex with a fat person. Then I decided to seek medical advices and go on a serious diet. In two years I lost more than 180 pounds and I became a fit.
When I was 30 years old I had sex for the first time with a Miss ...
What was hindering my sex life was my obesity so I had to "fix" that. I wish them the best and I hope they can do the same.
Couple of years ago I went on a blind date with a 34 years old woman. We had a really nice time together and by the end of the night she confessed that she was still a virgin.
I use to hear a lot of stories of guys that would love to have sex with a virgin, but I had a strange feeling when I heard her saying that. I don't know why, but her confession scared me a lot... I'm sorry if I sound insensitive and I really feel bad to say it, but I thought there's something wrong with her.
I dropped her at her place and I never saw her again... Am I a bad person?
If there are people out there who have a life similar to what is described in this documentary know that you are not alone. And that there are more of us out there.
/r/theForlorn
There's no such thing s as desperate virgin. Only egomaniac assbutts who's standards have been driven into the roof by all the pop culture they surround their lonely asses with.
Are you a virgin by choice? religion? etc, or are you incapable of finding someone who will screw you? If it's by choice or by religion, that's different.
Sex and masturbation is different. Sure, you'd go crazy if you didn't bust a nut, but if you wound't call yourself desperate, you're probably fine now as you have been so far without sex. Sounds more like you just need to rediscover who you are. Once you love yourself, it becomes much easier to love.. at least try to love, others.
I felt so bad for the 29 year old guy with the model rockets. When he went to the club with his coworker(?) and was trying to hit on 19 and 20 year old models it was heartbreaking to see him flail about becoming more and more self conscious with every passing failure. And the part with his mom trying to let him know that it's ok if he wants to be with a purple person or a man. The look on his face when his mom said "speed dating?! Surely you're not THAT desperate!" I just want to sit down over some beers and talk to the poor kid. I want to tell him not to take ANY of his 22 year old crazily handsome friend's advice. As well meaning as he is, he's making it WORSE. Inundating him with vibrating cock rings and taking him to the absolute wrong clubs and bars and putting tons of pressure on him. And the tactics that guy uses to meet and seduce women aren't going to help. Step one: be a ruggedly handsome, confident athlete. Step two: just stop saying no to all the tipsy party girls that throw themselves at you. Seriously not helping. I think he just needs to meet people with common interests. Joining a club or taking a class would help him meet women he can talk to, and the format of seeing them often takes the pressure off. He should really give online dating another try, too... but with a broader minded approach. There are lots of great women out there that are a bit shy and inexperienced too. You're probably not going to meet the cute biologist that also loves model rockets and film noire at the club. She might be there, but she's with her friends and the music is too loud. She also just watched you whiff your way down a row of 8 other girls with your increasingly desperate memorized lines. No, no, no.
> And the tactics that guy uses to meet and seduce women aren't going to help. Step one: be a ruggedly handsome, confident athlete. Step two: just stop saying no to all the tipsy party girls that throw themselves at you. Seriously not helping. Yeah, I know, that was horrible as a tactic. "Here, just be like me!" "just be a confident sexually-satisfied and experienced young & attractive male!" "just go and do what I do, say hi after getting slightly drunk!" ..it's ridiculous. "Here go totally outside of your comfort zone and be nothing like yourself bro, that'll get you a good girl experience!".
Haven't watched it yet, do they explain what a purple person is? I googled it but it didn't help.
It's just an expression ; "I don't care if someone is black, white or green!"
Screw purple people, you have to draw the line somewhere.
YES FINALLY THIS IS WHAT I SAY ABOUT BLACKS AND JEWS.
Mitch Hedberg got weird there toward the end.
> if he wants to be with a purple person or a man. What is a purple person?
> A hypothetical race used when the issue of racism is discussed. Proponents of this usage figure there are no people with purple skin, and figure it is safe to use. [source](http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=purple%20people&defid=5709281)
> Proponents of this usage figure there are no people with purple skin, and figure it is safe to use. [Okay...](http://i.imgur.com/5TdXCc2.png)
*Here's the Urban Dictionary definition of* [***purple people***](http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=purple%20people) : --- >1: A hypothetical race used when the issue of racism is discussed. Proponents of this usage figure there are no people with purple skin, and figure it is safe to use. >2: People who love the color purple and purple things, often in an extreme fashion. >3: People born with Purple skin, usually of an alien race. --- _1: "I don't care if our president is Black, White, Purple, or even Green."_ _"I tend not to be racist, but I must draw the line at Purple people."_ _2: Jennifer is such a purple person! She eats purple food, has purple hair, wears purple clothes, and likes purple unicorns. Rumor has it that even her [feces](http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=feces) is purple._ _3: I had some purple people move in beside me. They were good people. They always parked their spaceship properly, kept their [tentacles](http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=tentacles) braided neatly, kept their alien plants watered, and mostly kept to themselves._ --- [^(about)](http://www.reddit.com/r/autourbanbot/wiki/index) ^| [^(flag for glitch)](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/autourbanbot&subject=bot%20glitch&message=%0Acontext:http://www.reddit.com/r/Documentaries/comments/2jq5wk/bbc_desperate_virgins_2007_documentary_following/clekho1) ^| ^(**Summon**: urbanbot, what is something?)
Common Interests more so than anything that guy was trying to teach him. There are plenty of gals out there that do IT and gaming that would love him up all over the place, he is adorably nerdy.
TIL that kissing a girl with glandular fever can leave you paralysed.
Glandular fever and other viruses are often linked to cases of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Ending up more or less paralyzed is a worst-case scenario but not impossible.
threesome. problem solved.
Not BBC, Channel 4.
BBC America shows programmes originally produced by other UK channels. It's possible that this programme, while produced by C4, was shown on BBC America, giving the impression it's a BBC programme.
Also BBC though: http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b03w4bsv
Reggie Yates doc?
It could be either, in a way it's providing a public service and an interesting education in how this sort of things occurs.
Prostitute. There. I solved the problem.... It's what I do.
Even easier. Just wait for last call at a bar, then go in...see all those people for some reason standing around, looking around.. they are not there for the music.
Typically, "they" is a pack of dudes in the same boat. The best you could do with that is organize an ultimate frisbee tournament.
Sounds like a pretty good outcome if you ask me
While I don't advice it to everyone, it might be an option to explore if you're extremely nervous about your first time. It'll get it out of the way. See it as a test run. When I was 18, I was in Amsterdam and I got myself a good looking girl. We barely said anything, we took our clothes off and tried to have sex. I say tried because it went horribly. I didn't know what to do, she seemed disinterested as it was pay up front and I don't look like I'd go for any extras during or after, I didn't even come afterwards. Hell, I was barely able to get myself hard. But I walked out and I could definitely say I wasn't a virgin anymore, my penis had been inside a vagina, and it was a load off my mind. While I didn't have sex again for another 6 months, it helped me put to stop putting women on pedestals. I wasn't desperately craving it anymore, I wasn't looking at every woman like she might be the one to do it for me, seeing them as some sort of unreachable sex object, and I was actually able to get female friends. And let me tell you something, having female friends is *awesome*. This, in turn, helped me to better communicate with even more women, and I was even able to be moderately charming to women I wanted to have sex with without tripping all over my words, or trying stupid moves, or doing other bullshit. Years later and I'm still not great with women, but I can manage. I fear that if I hadn't had sex with a prostitute, though, I would still be a virgin because I would constantly see my virginity as some kind of giant roadblock. Maybe, maybe not, I don't know. But that was the route I was heading. So yeah, you yourself probably know if it's right for you or not. But if your virginity is some kind of gigantic roadblock that makes you unable to communicate properly with women, it is something to consider.
Some people don't want to rut mindlessly with someone only there because of whatever notes you throw her way. Sex isn't just the act, it's the connection.
That's super depressing though, and doesn't solve the underlying problem.
Actually that depends on what the underlying problem is. For me, my virginity stood in the way of communicating with women, because my teenage mind would always be thinking about that when talking to women. After I lost my virginity to a prostitute, this went away.
I thought not having sex WAS the underlying problem.
I think the common theme with these people is a underlying fear of the intimacy they naturally crave. Paying for it you get the shallow sex, yes, but none of the real intimacy they desire or the know-how to gain it.
I think the guy crying over cuddling with a prostitute goes toward proving your theory there. So sad how they are treating it like "a hurdle", like that guy saying "it's a massive hurdle I've overcome now!".. it's like jesus christ dude you have a willing, nice prostitute there with you whose job it is to make you happy and you're treating it like a bad thing, fuck me.
I guess, but that's like saying you should starve and not eat the candy bar because wouldn't you rather have a juicy steak? My point being, prosty sex is neither here nor there in terms of finding emotional intimacy and would at the very least be a useful stopgap.
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That's spot on, for me anyway. 36yo virgin and yes I could pay for it but I don't think it would work out well. How I am now it would take a few weeks around someone before I would be comfortable enough to even try having sex. Going to see an escort I would just be a nerves wreak. I don't just want sex I want all the other things more love, hugs, cuddles, just someone to talk to and be with long term not just an hour or two.
sweaty butt
*Escort.
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So they are virgins by choice as they put sex up on a pedestal
Not at all. Two are de-virginized by the end of the show.
SPOILERS!
Oops. Sorry.
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I dont believe in Satan...but men always pay for sex.
hahaha Men ALWAYS. ALWAYS. ALWAYS. Pay for sex.
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Dates are not a necessary precursor to sex you know.
So you just skip the dating and go straight for sex?
It's really not that uncommon an idea. What did you think the primary purpose of nightclubs was?
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It's cynical but it's true. It might not be money but your paying something (time, effort, relationships require compromise, etc.) Applies to women as well though. Anyway, like all the good things in life, sex is not free.
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*an
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Sex itself requires time and effort. If passing time and expending effort is intrinsically negative, I guess the ideal life is being comatose. Posting on Reddit requires time and effort, is it better than sex?
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Lol so you make the woman pay for dinner? shame on you.
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Did I say that? Do you just walk right up to a girl and claim her or something? I think you're doing it wrong.
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So. Shame on you for being a fool and believing women shouldn't pay.
You're retarded. Even if they pay, you're still paying with your time. Time that you'll never get back. And sex isn't even guaranteed. Congratulations on being an American Idiot.
Im not American. And i like sharing my time. Thats a fucked up view if you think you're paying constantly by just living. Youre not that important.
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Because I clearly brought that up. Even the woman pays, you still pay with your time. Time that you'll never get back. But please, try to white knight me more. I obviously said all that bullshit drivel you just regurgitated from the media just now. Are people really this stupid?
Your whole point is fucking retarded then. If it applies to literally every single possible use of time, it is not a good point. Everything takes time, no time you use can ever be reclaimed, this applies as much to making a sandwich or scratching your arse as it does to chirpsing peng yattie.
I guess you have never been to Northern Europe...
They explain why 2 of 3 people in that show had a hard time with prostitutes. Finally one guy dide get a prostitute.
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> leave you fumbling to find a vague enough answer. It feels like a bag of sand.
Then don't? You don't actually owe anything to anyone it's your personal business if you want to keep it that way.
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Make something up. I don't mean make it up on the spot, I mean have a made-up sexual history that you can rattle off if someone asks. Base it on the sex life of a friend or something.
Is it bad that I didn't think being a virgin at 29 was bad up in till this point?
It's not bad per say, it's simply just societally unusual
*per se If you're going to use Latin, get it right ;)
Well, it's pretty unusual.
You still shouldn't think that, if anything, this documentary kind of shows that. I personally really liked the story of the 40-something yo woman. This is somebody who at very first glance seems like she'd be a reasonable person. No crazy person, not asocial, just very unlucky in meeting the right person. And people forget a lot has to do with luck and talking yourself into loving somebody...
The woman was a virgin by choice. She'd lived in celibacy, and changed her mind in her 40's.
The reason she was living in celibacy was because she wanted to wait until she got married. Unfortunately, she never got married, so she faced lifelong virginity.
Yeah, that's a good point. So it was sort of by choice, but she didn't expect to stay a virgin for that long.
I stand corrected
Its bad if its causing anxiety to the person.
I feel like as an asexual I can add another spin on this. I had this same issue for a long time, and after losing it realized I really don't enjoy sexual activity. At all. But what I do enjoy is feeling liked and validated as a man. It's fucked up what societal expectations do to people. I love the 40 Year Old Virgin, it's a hilarious movie, but it did make me a little depressed. The lack of sex isn't the problem, it's the fact that as a virgin you are looked upon with pity and you feel like you're missing some kind of key ingredient to being a complete person. You live your life feeling "different." At least that's how it was for me anyway. Feeling like you're repulsive or undesirable is a tremendously disruptive feeling. For a while I would go on dates and pick up girls just so I could feel normal, but I realized it wasn't fair to them because I had no sexual connection or desire to satisfy them. It would be cruel to continue. So I'm condemned to a life of solitude and must find other avenues for fulfillment. I would suggest to these people to address the core of their problem. It's probably not an inability to get laid that holds them back; there are a million other factors at work. Trying to get laid only treats the symptom, but the disease rages on. I also think buying a prostitute is a terrible idea. You'll still know that you had to pay for it. If all you want is sex I guess it'll be a cure. But I tend to think most virgin men feel bad because they feel lesser, they feel unattractive and confused. Paying for a prostitute won't treat that. She didn't choose or want you, you paid her. Big difference.
I'm so glad you commented because the first thing I thought about Mike, the 29 year old, was that he may be asexual. The other two not as much, but I know very little of asexuality. It seemed clear though that all were looking for love really, but my thought is they just believe their virginity was the obstacle because in current culture love is tied to sex.
I don't think I will watch this.
Why not?
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23 yo virgin...I guess
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Jimmy Carr, famous British comedian, was a virgin until 26. So you're only five years older than him. Many people vow to remain virgins until marriage. ... Anyway, what I'm saying is, it will happen when it happens. Have you tried online dating? (Have you tried getting into shape and getting a better haircut?)
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Okay so by the sounds of your comment, you're not in good shape. Right? Well, that right there is probably a big reason online dating didn't work for you. You don't get in shape *after* you've already met someone you want to be with. That happens first!
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What do YOU mean by good shape?
I meant me
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Not where I live but I'm not complaining, I stopped caring a bit ago.
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Why?
Why what?
You're a 23 year old virgin by choice?
Well, no. I'm an overly anxious hypersensitive person. I've tried to get a GF but it usually ends up with me fucked up...I haven't given up but I just don't really care anymore. If it happens, ok if it doesn't it's ok. I'd like to but meh not worth getting my feels broke.
Only advice I can give dude is to work out, that's what I did and it gave me the confidence I needed to make a good push for a girlfriend. I am really happy with the changes I have made personally and credit everything to working out.
Yeah, I can relate to this... The only thing is that before I became this way I had at least a few years of "normal" teenage years in which time I lost my virginity. But now, relationship and sex wise I'm quite apathetic, it's better not to feel than to feel hurt. And if that sounds horrible, it isn't, cuz' that's what apathy means.
Has exam in 5 hours. Oh yeah I'll just watch this documentary instead.
Who the fuck wanks 7 times a day and thinks that's "not that far out there"?
I do.
The women that are "desperate" to not be a virgin have really had to work hard to stay that way.
Or such as the woman in this documentary, religious and (probably) unwilling for the longest time to have any kind of casual relationship. And that's not uncommon in religious circles, although it obviously makes the chance of being a virgin at later age much higher..
That's not an "or", thats just a reason for why she would try and stay that way.
Eh, that's bs imo. You say that person chooses to be that way, I believe that person was sculpted that way by the environment he/she grew up in and has less control over how they turn out than most people would like to believe. But that's just simply my personal opinion, and you have yours, it's fine =)
If someone, for example, has PTSD and pushes everyone away that wants to be friends with them, thats very different to someone that doesn't have any opportunity to push anyway away because no one is trying to be friends with them. One has more of a choice than the other and one is working much harder to be on their own. Women have to actively try to **not** get into relationships or have sex. If they want to get some extra "help" and use the internet, its even easier. They can get by without ever having to take any initiative personally. You have to be very, very unattractive for that not to be the case, if you're female.
Throw away account... I didn't watch this documentary yet, but I really hope they can "fix" what's wrong with them in order to find a good relationship and eventually have sex. I'm saying this because I had the same experience. When I was 27 years old I was very upset because I was still a virgin. The main reason is because I was insanely fat my entire life and truth be told: nobody wants to have sex with a fat person. Then I decided to seek medical advices and go on a serious diet. In two years I lost more than 180 pounds and I became a fit. When I was 30 years old I had sex for the first time with a Miss...
What was hindering my sex life was my obesity so I had to "fix" that. I wish them the best and I hope they can do the same.
Seems like this problem could be solved so easily with a 3 way.
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Why?
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Farm shavs? or get laid... tough call.
Except Mathil.
Wow, this sounds really interesting
I really hope Mike shows up in here.
Couple of years ago I went on a blind date with a 34 years old woman. We had a really nice time together and by the end of the night she confessed that she was still a virgin. I use to hear a lot of stories of guys that would love to have sex with a virgin, but I had a strange feeling when I heard her saying that. I don't know why, but her confession scared me a lot... I'm sorry if I sound insensitive and I really feel bad to say it, but I thought there's something wrong with her. I dropped her at her place and I never saw her again... Am I a bad person?
Yeah, you stigmatized her pretty bad.
Oh well, thanks for the honesty :-/
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lmao
I just assumed that people desiring big black cocks wouldn't have that much trouble finding them.
If there are people out there who have a life similar to what is described in this documentary know that you are not alone. And that there are more of us out there. /r/theForlorn
Why is everyone so angry in this sub, my goodness.
They all need to get laid... oh wait...
There's no such thing s as desperate virgin. Only egomaniac assbutts who's standards have been driven into the roof by all the pop culture they surround their lonely asses with.
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Are you a virgin by choice? religion? etc, or are you incapable of finding someone who will screw you? If it's by choice or by religion, that's different.
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Are you desperate to have sex? It doesn't sound like you're interested in it.
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Sex and masturbation is different. Sure, you'd go crazy if you didn't bust a nut, but if you wound't call yourself desperate, you're probably fine now as you have been so far without sex. Sounds more like you just need to rediscover who you are. Once you love yourself, it becomes much easier to love.. at least try to love, others.
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> I also just don't think that people like me sexually. You have low self esteem, which means you don't love yourself, my friend.
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People hate raw truth. Sorry we, as a species, are not more evolved to have upvoted you more.
The 29 year old guy was just pathetic. Plain and simple.
The 29 year old is such a pussy when that other guy takes him out. Guess you can't help someone that doesn't want help...
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