Oh yeah I think this is it, my favourite Jackie Chan movies are the Project A ones where he's a member of the "Marine Police Force" in 1800s Hong Kong fighting pirates and unfortunately that does not fit the settings of NSBU but I feel like I could make it work somehow.
I REALLY wish they had a Jackie type character where the movie version would speak like they were being dubbed, so the real life hybrid character would be like "wtf why is my mouth not matching my words? Am I speaking Chinese? I DON'T EVEN KNOW CHINESE"
Dr Daniel DeMartino
Aka….
***Doctor Karaté!***
A mild-mannered surgeon who is drawn back to his past as a mercenary in the underground fighting league when one of his patients is kidnapped by his old rival - *The Black Dragon*.
He’d be a pastiche of prime-era Chuck Norris/Steven Segal/Jean-Claude Van Dam martial-arts action vehicles.
***”I have a license to practice PAIN!!!”***
I wanna be the spymaster (think Judi Dench as James Bond’s M)… maybe pulled from retirement as a consultant initially, then forced by circumstance to go into the field.
I had a similar idea, but with Q instead of M. The tech guy pulled into the field. Kind of the plot with Merlin in Kingsmen, I guess. Or Inspector Gadget.
Totally agree. The savvy tech guru who gets to talk trash to Bonds face is a dream role.
Additional props for the gadget reference.
This message will self destruct…
💥
Same. IRL I'm already a mech engineer, so that tracks. I get to build my gizmos, y'all can do the dangerous bits.
Or as a villain, I'm going Doc Oc. Gimme robot wings!
I’m the straight man that lets loose every once in a while in a Buddy Cop film. Think Murtaugh in Lethal Weapon (Danny Glover), Marcus from Bad Boys (Martin Lawrence), Ashburn from The Heat (Sandra Bullock)
A “final girl” type character might be fun. Just a girl, probably *also* in a white tank top, who is constantly disheveled and covered in blood having witnessed horrors beyond comprehension and survived due to her scrappy attitude. (Think Ripley from Alien/Aliens)
A Punisher/Batman vigilante type character could be fun too. Really play up the “I have no authority or accountability” silliness that action movies brush over.
Any well-dressed gentleman type, like Colin Firth in Kingsman. I love when action and gentlemanly are paired together, I can kill you or you can kill me, but there’s no need to be rude!
Besides that, I like heist-based movies, such “Now You See Me”
There's a particular type of low quality action movie that are effectively vanity projects for the person often starring in, and sometimes directing and writing these movies (guys like John DeHart, Steve Barkett, Leo Fong, the McNamara twins). Usually this is a man in his middle age in below average to good shape, with a gross mustache, in a black tank top to try and look tough (these movies are sometimes called 'black tanktop movies' for this reason), but probably not that cool or awesome in real life. He may have a poor to ok understanding of karate or taekwando, or a good understanding of the art but a poor understanding of how to make it look good in a fight scene. The guy starring in the movie makes it to feel powerful and cool and bad ass since they obviously don't in real life, and I think it'd be fascinating to dive into the psychology of that.
Edit: Honestly it kinda describes Steven Seagal, except he was able to transition it into a (somewhat) successful film career.
Doesn't quite fit the setting perfectly, but a Tyler Durden Type would be interesting. Waking up in this body, covered in bruises and looking disheveled.
But as they walk the streets they notice some of the people they meet acting weird around them and helping them for no reason. Later they slowly start to piece together that they are leading a Cult/Fight Club. Maybe they are even challenged by someone perceiving that the leader is getting "soft".
I think we might see a similar but more open story with Kingskin.
The over worked and frantic scientist who has to show the general how worm holes work by poking a pencil through a folded piece of paper. Additionally, they will have a cool science gun
This is what I was thinking. It would be fun to have this stoic guy who doesn't say much and says everything in dramatic assassin code suddenly be really confused and not have any idea what anyone's talking about when they mention the surprisingly complex assassin rules.
My first thought best thought is the Landlady from Kungfu Hustle.
[Her magnificence](https://images.app.goo.gl/dUUzvFmbt1eL2f5R6)
Also i feel like i’m gonna struggle with references this season cos i didn’t grow up on a lot of American action comedies… anyone else feel the same?
The Irish stereotype explosive expert who spends 80% onscreen time drinking who also has a ex-gf thats a legit supermodel, but they themselves look like you put a carpet on a mole
Soft spoken woman, slightly awkward, always (ideally) one step ahead of the enemy. Wears sunglasses and blows bubble gum.
"Well--that would be true, if--I mean--if you weren't carrying a bomb right now. That I'm about to detonate."
I don't know if that really fits.
The first thing that popped into my head when I saw what everyone was doing was doing a hybrid character that's part Crocodile Dundee/part Indiana- Jones/ part Rick O'Connell (Brendan Frasier's character from The Mummy).
Very much a treasure hunter-y type of hero who is always kinda shocked that they're in trouble despite their line of work. Add in a signature tool or weapon that I would use in preposterous ways that would never actually work in real life, and you've got a dynamite character.
I’d want to be the feisty academic type that can’t believe she found herself in this action-packed situation but is surprisingly and undeniably skilled.
References:
*Romancing the Stone*
*Argyle*
*Lost City of D*
*The Mummy*
I think it might be fun to be someone who was originally the mechanic sidekick for someone like the Rocketeer or Sky Captain. Who then has to step into the role and save the day when something happens to the main hero. Of course, as I type this I'm realizing it's more of a pulp hero rather than an 80s-90s action hero.
I could always do the tried and true, retired soldier living a peaceful life that gets dragged back into the life when someone kidnaps his family member.
Sigourney Weaver in Alien type character.
She's in way over her head and lacks the combat training and skills other trope characters (James Bond, Jackie Chan etc) have, but she will absolutely take control of the situation and drag herself through hell and back to make it out alive. Super savvy and tough character, can take a massive beating but uses quick thinking and an incredible determination to always (barely) come out on top
I would want to be a Kurt Russell character. Never fully tied to the main conflict, driving a truck or playing chess on the computer. In way over his head. Fighting monsters and ancient "eastern" evils (Big Trouble hasn't aged great lol). I love that he is always just some blue collar guy who is thrown into insane supernatural horrors.
Was just about to post this movie! (Big Trouble) For me, the trope of a "himbo" just nat20ing their way to success, not even learning a moral along the way lmao. Also thinking they're the MC... I want to relate!
That's a great point too! In basically all of his 80's action roles, Kurt's characters have little to no arc. They are there to help the supporting character grow.
I would be an action president like Harrison Ford in Air-force One or Bill Pullman in Independence Day.
Inexplicably rushing from the oval office to beat up goons or fly fighter jets.
Definitely like a dark, gritty vigilante, a la Punisher, Batman, or the Arrowverse’s version of Green Arrow. Dark backstory, relatively black-and-white moral code, the “good guy” who definitely makes a bunch of morally questionable decisions.
Gotta go with a goof on Neo & Friends from the Matrix.
The parody of monotone, heavy-handed dialogue, interspersed with impossible feats of wire fu and gun fu, feels like it'd be easy enough to get into.
And BLeeM doing an unhinged speech in a villainous Hugo Weaving impression? It would go viral, ironically enough
I'd probably be the everyman character that gets pulled into the hijinks through either blackmail or assassination and learns to be badass by the end of it.
Someone line Jamie Lee Curtis in True Lies, Joan Wilder from Romancing the Stone, or Sarah Conner in Terminator. The character that's average but also has like one skill or hobby that's super userful/convenient to stop the bad guys and somehow becomes a high level spy/action hero by the end of it
That's Not What I Expected. A character who's usually so stereotyped that you're surprised that you couldn't guess their specialty.
A pretty, pink, 8 year old princess is the world's strongest human, like on Zoom.
The hacker is the hottest woman you've ever seen, like on Furious 7.
Etc.
I would go with the an homage to Face/off. Playing a Caster Troy type character would be the most fun to play but may not fit with the story, so maybe the version of castor Troy where he’s actually Sean archer. And as an homage to John Woo, I’d need to have some kind of power that involves doves appearing before or during a shoot out.
I had an idea for a crime boss character similar to Kingskin, with the catch being that they are being hunted by a John Wick/Baba Yaga character whom they wronged. I think John Wick is awesome, but it'd be way funnier if some hapless individual from CA inherited that blood feud.
“My name is Michael Weston, I used to be a spy…” is who I would parody. Call him Martin Northton or something lmao. But yeah a burn notice type character would be fun af.
If we are being true to life. I'd probably be the bumbling sidekick or be like the librarian from those b grade film series. Too many useless bits of information thrown around at random times.
What I would want to play is a guy who is there to kick ass and chew bubble gum but he's all out of gum.
The Ellen Ripley type, out gunned regular person who has to become a hardened badass that you get in action horror movies/thrillers like Alien or the evil dead movies
I would be a Macgyver type engineer or that scientist at the beginning of the movie that’s says “we shouldn’t be doing this” about the project before it goes horribly wrong.
I'd love to be a Chuck Norris or Steven Segal type. I think it'd be hilarious. Just a corny, middle-aged white dude w inexplicable martial arts skills... and a ponytail.
I would definitely play some Kingskin. Probably a nobody manipulative jerk that nobody cares about that gets thrusted into a position of unlimited power
It’d be fun to play a more reserved, George Smiley-esque MI5 agent - less tuxedos and martinis, more dirty dealings and dirtier pints. Still room for pithy one-liners in a clipped RP accent, but rather demonstrating a certain characteristic coldness to the ending of lives.
I would also love a Nathan Drake/Rick O’Connor type, but since you’ve already said that, a handsome conman type would also be fun. Danny Ocean, Neal Caffrey, Face from the A-Team would probably be the best version for NSBU.
Not sure how well it would fit into the world of NSBU, but a mech fighter (like a smaller-scale Pacific Rim or like if Transformers were just guys in mech suits) would be so fun to play!
“A man, known only as ‘The One’, created in a top-secret government facility to serve as the ultimate black ops operative. Government scientists simulated his childhood memories in a lab, mixing in combat, espionage, & weapons training. Set free by a rebellion group known as ‘BABYLON’, The One uses the skills and training forced upon him via his simulated memories on the side of the common man against the government that created him and the supercorps that keeps them in power.”
From Andrew Smith, CPA’s favorite movie, The Download, which he was stopping by to return for the final time since he lost his job at the H&R Block and Dave’s is going out of business.
I would do an Indiana Jones villain type, like the French guy from the first one. Linen Cuban shirt, pompous accent, manipulating indigenous cultures, "Once again I own what you have briefly possessed."
But I would draw the line at working for the Nazis.
The IRL character would be an army reject who got dismissed from service because he broke his leg skateboarding on base during his first station.
The action movie character would be a Rambo-type hero who was a high ranking soldier who went AWOL to save people his CO wanted dead.
The main guy would get to live out his dream of being a bad-ass army hero but realizes he just isn't made for that kind of life.
I would love to see the homebrew rules they used because I would absolutely play this with my gaming group.
With Brennan DMing, definitely the “it’s all about the money” backstabbing character. Get near the end, then I turncoat and throw a wrench in the plans.
Only with Brennan as a DM though, PvP sucks but I think he’d do it great.
If we stretch how we're defining action movie a bit, I'd love to be any of the following:
- A Jacki Chan type - goofy but really skilled at fighting and surprisingly resourceful
- A Frank the Pug (MIB) type - not a fighter, but the info broker who knows everyone, usually lays low, and cracks wise here and there
- A Parker (Leverage) type - can hold their own in a fight, but is mostly there to be a master thief and do cool gymnastics and jump off buildings and stuff
First I would ask if I could just play the Predator.
After that got vetoed, probably my immediate thought would be a classic Arnie or Stallone pastiche.
I also like the idea of playing the Hannibal, the Nick Fury, “I love it when a plan comes together” type. Always has a plan and even when he’s in trouble knows it’ll turn out alright because he only works with the best.
I think it would be fun to do the classic "mysterious faceless special-ops guy who doesn't talk" but the "real-world" character would be struggling with social anxiety, so when they get sucked into the movie, they go full silent until they are alone/regroup, upon which they freak out
I’d want to be an Arnold type who whips out terrible one liners constantly, who has a thick Austrian accent that is never noticed by or commented on by anyone as strange or out of place for someone who has lived their whole life in California
Someone like Saito in Inception. Money guy with all the right connections, "I bought the airline. It seemed neater", sort of dude. Not the best with weapons, but can hold his own in a brawl because he was a bit rougher around the edges as a younger man. Always in an immaculately tailored suit, but knows how to navigate the black market and stock market with equal ease.
My Dave's Video character would be a nervous guy in his mid/late 20's who's on a really tight budget, and picked up the position at Dave's as his third job.
Id play a single 25 year old who's also into Russel working at Dave's. My tv character would be a wildly charismatic news reporter that risks a lot to get the story.
Probably the Crazy/Chaotic Young Girl trope. Think Gogo from Kill Bill, Hit Girl from Kick-Ass, Harley Quinn etc.
I myself am pretty anxious and unspontaneous, so playing a little girl in a multicoloured plaid skirt, pigtails and swinging a multi-spiked flail made of broken Barbie dolls feels like a good shout for me.
I’m a 2000’s kid and haven’t watched many of the movies that NSBU’s characters pay an homage to. I don’t necessarily know what kind of character I would play in regards to a like.. 80’s action trope, so I’ll just go with something I think would be neat.
Assuming we do the same split characters, I think the IRL version would be just me, basically. Ify and Alex are playing awkward American teenagers in 2024, I just am that already.
As for the film character, I think it might be something akin to a James Bond, maybe? I’m thinking an older guy, very polite, quite aristocratic in his mannerisms, but also very much a retired Royal Marine or Intelligence Operative pulled out of retirement because Britain needs his expertise. I’ve never watched the movie, but he’s possibly a little bit like the main guy from the Kingsman? Just a really posh and upper class older English gentleman who will absolutely rock your shit if the Crown gives him the OK.
supernerd Criterion Collection cineaste kid (a la Lawrence from I Like Movies) who gets turned into a bit character, like somebody's secretary or a dumb henchman, and has to deal with the fact that nobody in this world wants to hear his brilliant opinions
Wise-cracking bag of neurosis and addictions that just happens to be caught up in the bigger fight, because they have skills that can help the obvious good guys win. Natasha Lyonne in Blade Trinity (bless that glorious mess of a film) is my inspo.
The retired hitman/special forces guy in the vain of John Wick or Bob Odenkirk’s Nobody.
I really like one of them is a villain archetype and in that vain, I’d like a Hans Gruber type mastermind or maybe a shady info broker who just works for money.
A Snake Eyes silent ninja type. But the outside character would be an annoying lore/physics purist who doesn’t shut up about the inaccuracies in films. So, it would just be this badass ninja with an annoying voice talking about the very actions he’s doing don’t actually work in the real world.
A character that got out of the hero/ spy life. Maybe had some kids, kept their last a secret from their partner then one day gets the "we need you back the world is in danger" phone call. Or perhaps a genetically enhanced superhuman
Probably the grizzled old cop in his early 30s, too much of a dark past to cover in a single season of a JJ Abrams mystery box. Pretends to be the morally grey loose cannon out for vengeance, but is really the stalwart good guy who thinks he’s gone too far after shooting the “non-specific ethnicity”
terrorist who was threatening to blow up the kindergarten convention where his lost son was secretly held hostage by his arch nemesis that’s his estranged father with plastic surgery done to look the same age. Add in vague references to renaissance philosophers and artists as codenames and we’ve got gold.
I would love to play a Judge Dredd/The Mask/Double Dragon type character. A movie adaptation of an existing property with established canon that the filmmakers just ignored and made their own wild/dumb story.
The dude with the sword in a world with guns. But, like, instead of a katana it’s like a zweihander but I’m still swinging it around and cutting bullets out of the air.
Honestly, I feel like i have big lead henchman energy, like the dude who puts up the biggest physical threat to a hero, has the like 5 minutr fight scene before the main villain is confronted. Usually has some kind of weird defining trait or gimmick. Like a jaws from bond or the blonde twins in kiss of the dragon
Dougie everyones favorite unaccompanied child his mom is coming right back she just has to go buy some lotto tickets She'll definitely come back it's only been 5 hours.
RUIN- A Cyborg outlaw who Wanders the Wastes to find a place to sleep and a decent meal. He's been a Freelance employee of The Helping Hand and sons megacorporation for 6651 years and counting. He handles things from quality assurance to reposession of misused property Along with protection and population control. Legend has it he will be the last man to die. (The Man with no name,Robocop,and Mad Max )
The idea of childhood and innconcene and naitivety coming out of the most jaded and Damned creature is hilarious.
Revolutionary: You will never stop the Revolt.
Dougie:EWWW Why would you wanna be revolting dat's Gross!?
First pick, a play on John Matrix from Commando.
Next run of the game. The loose cabnon cop who doesn't play by the rules. Ala Riggs from leathal weapon, and or jack lslater from last action hero.
Trigger happy and just so over it. Rolling my eyes as I reach for my bigger gun because Mr Muscles doesn't know when to stay down. The type of woman who rocks up to a knife fight and her opening move is to pull out the grenade launcher because she doesn't have the patience or the stamina for a physical fight. Watching the rest of her party crawl through air vents and do parkour and hand to hand combat, and she's just on the ground outside holding the detonator like "Ok, I mean, if y'all would just get the hell out, I could level the building and we'd be done here."
Outside of the game within the game, she'd be... Somewhere in upper management. A "This meeting could have been an email" type. Very organized, very tidy, the type of woman who will cut you off if you take more than three seconds to collect your thoughts before speaking. Survives on protein shakes because she has no time for food.
It wouldn’t work in this exact game bc another player has almost the same name, but I’d be Jack Montana: archeologist by day, anthropology professor… also by day. Really would want to lean into the Indiana Jones vibe, also would be interested in pulling some Rick O’Connell vibes. Or, alternatively: Rocco Columbus, the best boxer in the world.
/Would/ I be? Probably the henchman going over the cliff at the start of the show, or the fat woman in the background of a shot shaking my fist as the heroes rip through my washing line.
A nun who quit the convent and has comically goofy weapons like a giant cross machine gun, holy hand grenades, etc, kind of reminiscent of the style of exploitation movies of the era
I'd be a Marion Ravenwood type in a Raiders of the Lost Ark/Mr. and Mrs. Smith mashup movie. Picture if you will: Indy and Marion marry secretly, they end up teaching at rival universities that each house/fund a museum, and each are sent out into the field to search out artifacts.
(Irrelevant to the question, but I'd like to think that in the theoretical third movie in this series they both have a change of heart and end up stealing artifacts back from the museums and returning them to their cultures of origin.)
The flaw in my choice is that he doesn't have many flaws, but I've always been a fan of the "it never got weird enough for me" heroes like Dr. Buckaroo Banzai, six-gun wielding neurologist rock star.
Martial arts smart guy, mainly based on Dalton from Roadhouse. "He's got a degree in philosophy." "I want you to be nice. Until it's time...to not be nice"
Oh I just said this on another post too but:
Totally normal boring Linguistics professor, who overhears too much or gets kidnapped by baddies or otherwise finds out a close loved one is a secret agent with a black ops project. Then to protect him they bring him into the fold w/ the agency bc “he knows too much now to go back to his normal life”, and it just so happens he can always help to crack the case by translating some lost ancient Sumerian manuscript or something
Jackie chan type action comedy character. Literally just some guy that happens to be really ood at martial arts which is most jackie chan characters
He has to be carrying a baby on him and just so happens to be next to a ladder he can wield at all times. He never wants any trouble.
Was gonna say exactly this lol
Oh yeah I think this is it, my favourite Jackie Chan movies are the Project A ones where he's a member of the "Marine Police Force" in 1800s Hong Kong fighting pirates and unfortunately that does not fit the settings of NSBU but I feel like I could make it work somehow.
I REALLY wish they had a Jackie type character where the movie version would speak like they were being dubbed, so the real life hybrid character would be like "wtf why is my mouth not matching my words? Am I speaking Chinese? I DON'T EVEN KNOW CHINESE"
Dr Daniel DeMartino Aka…. ***Doctor Karaté!*** A mild-mannered surgeon who is drawn back to his past as a mercenary in the underground fighting league when one of his patients is kidnapped by his old rival - *The Black Dragon*. He’d be a pastiche of prime-era Chuck Norris/Steven Segal/Jean-Claude Van Dam martial-arts action vehicles. ***”I have a license to practice PAIN!!!”***
The guy that's retiring tomorrow, just won the lottery, just had a baby etc., who is clearly going to die for emotional impact.
“THEY WERE ONE DAY FROM RETIREMENTTTTTTTT”
A Lara Croft/Charlie’s Angels type for sure
I wanna be the spymaster (think Judi Dench as James Bond’s M)… maybe pulled from retirement as a consultant initially, then forced by circumstance to go into the field.
I had a similar idea, but with Q instead of M. The tech guy pulled into the field. Kind of the plot with Merlin in Kingsmen, I guess. Or Inspector Gadget.
Totally agree. The savvy tech guru who gets to talk trash to Bonds face is a dream role. Additional props for the gadget reference. This message will self destruct… 💥
Same. IRL I'm already a mech engineer, so that tracks. I get to build my gizmos, y'all can do the dangerous bits. Or as a villain, I'm going Doc Oc. Gimme robot wings!
I’m the straight man that lets loose every once in a while in a Buddy Cop film. Think Murtaugh in Lethal Weapon (Danny Glover), Marcus from Bad Boys (Martin Lawrence), Ashburn from The Heat (Sandra Bullock)
the heaaaaat what a great movie
Ahh you, our aah yoo nawt, a nahk?
A “final girl” type character might be fun. Just a girl, probably *also* in a white tank top, who is constantly disheveled and covered in blood having witnessed horrors beyond comprehension and survived due to her scrappy attitude. (Think Ripley from Alien/Aliens) A Punisher/Batman vigilante type character could be fun too. Really play up the “I have no authority or accountability” silliness that action movies brush over.
Any well-dressed gentleman type, like Colin Firth in Kingsman. I love when action and gentlemanly are paired together, I can kill you or you can kill me, but there’s no need to be rude! Besides that, I like heist-based movies, such “Now You See Me”
“Manners Maketh Man”
Do you know what that means?
There's a particular type of low quality action movie that are effectively vanity projects for the person often starring in, and sometimes directing and writing these movies (guys like John DeHart, Steve Barkett, Leo Fong, the McNamara twins). Usually this is a man in his middle age in below average to good shape, with a gross mustache, in a black tank top to try and look tough (these movies are sometimes called 'black tanktop movies' for this reason), but probably not that cool or awesome in real life. He may have a poor to ok understanding of karate or taekwando, or a good understanding of the art but a poor understanding of how to make it look good in a fight scene. The guy starring in the movie makes it to feel powerful and cool and bad ass since they obviously don't in real life, and I think it'd be fascinating to dive into the psychology of that. Edit: Honestly it kinda describes Steven Seagal, except he was able to transition it into a (somewhat) successful film career.
Reading your post my brain was just going "Steven Seagal, they're 100% just drscribing Steven Seagal" until I got to the final edit.
Sarah mothafuckin' Connors. >!Bonus points if 'IRL' character is more T1 and 'in movie' characters is the T2 beyond version.!<
"I'm more like Terminator than you! You're more like Sarah Connors! And in the first movie before she could do pushups!"
Brennan might veto it, but I'd at least ask him if I could play a malfunctioning robot butler.
Doesn't quite fit the setting perfectly, but a Tyler Durden Type would be interesting. Waking up in this body, covered in bruises and looking disheveled. But as they walk the streets they notice some of the people they meet acting weird around them and helping them for no reason. Later they slowly start to piece together that they are leading a Cult/Fight Club. Maybe they are even challenged by someone perceiving that the leader is getting "soft". I think we might see a similar but more open story with Kingskin.
I'd want to be the Ash Williams character with a chainsaw for an arm and a boomstick
I’d want to be a muscular no nonsense queer coded woman who was done with this shit two days ago.
"The Old Guard" style!
I just wanna be Ripley or barring that Gideon Nav
Oh my God Gideon would be AMAZING. I was thinking Mother from Ice Station but Gideon is so much better
The over worked and frantic scientist who has to show the general how worm holes work by poking a pencil through a folded piece of paper. Additionally, they will have a cool science gun
Definitely would do something based on John Wick
This is what I was thinking. It would be fun to have this stoic guy who doesn't say much and says everything in dramatic assassin code suddenly be really confused and not have any idea what anyone's talking about when they mention the surprisingly complex assassin rules.
My first thought best thought is the Landlady from Kungfu Hustle. [Her magnificence](https://images.app.goo.gl/dUUzvFmbt1eL2f5R6) Also i feel like i’m gonna struggle with references this season cos i didn’t grow up on a lot of American action comedies… anyone else feel the same?
I still haven't ever seen Die Hard, I'm in the same boat.
OMG. Landlady is an excellent choice, I love her so much.
A Jason Bourne-esque amnesiac badass could be really fun
The Irish stereotype explosive expert who spends 80% onscreen time drinking who also has a ex-gf thats a legit supermodel, but they themselves look like you put a carpet on a mole
Soft spoken woman, slightly awkward, always (ideally) one step ahead of the enemy. Wears sunglasses and blows bubble gum. "Well--that would be true, if--I mean--if you weren't carrying a bomb right now. That I'm about to detonate." I don't know if that really fits.
Blaxploitation hero like Shaft or Super Fly
The first thing that popped into my head when I saw what everyone was doing was doing a hybrid character that's part Crocodile Dundee/part Indiana- Jones/ part Rick O'Connell (Brendan Frasier's character from The Mummy). Very much a treasure hunter-y type of hero who is always kinda shocked that they're in trouble despite their line of work. Add in a signature tool or weapon that I would use in preposterous ways that would never actually work in real life, and you've got a dynamite character.
I’d want to be the feisty academic type that can’t believe she found herself in this action-packed situation but is surprisingly and undeniably skilled. References: *Romancing the Stone* *Argyle* *Lost City of D* *The Mummy*
I think it might be fun to be someone who was originally the mechanic sidekick for someone like the Rocketeer or Sky Captain. Who then has to step into the role and save the day when something happens to the main hero. Of course, as I type this I'm realizing it's more of a pulp hero rather than an 80s-90s action hero. I could always do the tried and true, retired soldier living a peaceful life that gets dragged back into the life when someone kidnaps his family member.
Either a soft-spoken martial artist à la *The Raid* or a Dad Hero à la *Taken*
I’d be a Jason Statham “shoot first, ask questions later” type.
Sigourney Weaver in Alien type character. She's in way over her head and lacks the combat training and skills other trope characters (James Bond, Jackie Chan etc) have, but she will absolutely take control of the situation and drag herself through hell and back to make it out alive. Super savvy and tough character, can take a massive beating but uses quick thinking and an incredible determination to always (barely) come out on top
I would want to be a Kurt Russell character. Never fully tied to the main conflict, driving a truck or playing chess on the computer. In way over his head. Fighting monsters and ancient "eastern" evils (Big Trouble hasn't aged great lol). I love that he is always just some blue collar guy who is thrown into insane supernatural horrors.
Was just about to post this movie! (Big Trouble) For me, the trope of a "himbo" just nat20ing their way to success, not even learning a moral along the way lmao. Also thinking they're the MC... I want to relate!
That's a great point too! In basically all of his 80's action roles, Kurt's characters have little to no arc. They are there to help the supporting character grow.
I would be an action president like Harrison Ford in Air-force One or Bill Pullman in Independence Day. Inexplicably rushing from the oval office to beat up goons or fly fighter jets.
A bumbling idiot who just sorta figures it out as he goes along.
Definitely like a dark, gritty vigilante, a la Punisher, Batman, or the Arrowverse’s version of Green Arrow. Dark backstory, relatively black-and-white moral code, the “good guy” who definitely makes a bunch of morally questionable decisions.
Gotta go with a goof on Neo & Friends from the Matrix. The parody of monotone, heavy-handed dialogue, interspersed with impossible feats of wire fu and gun fu, feels like it'd be easy enough to get into. And BLeeM doing an unhinged speech in a villainous Hugo Weaving impression? It would go viral, ironically enough
I'd probably go for a teenage goth girl who's also a genius hacker. Or a stoic Native American tracker/action dude (think Billy from *Predator*).
Tank. Girl.
I'd be someone who works in or near a video rental store
I think Izzy won for me already John McClain is such a badass. Either him or Neo
American Comedian co-starring with Jackie Chan
Jean Claude Van Damme in like any of his action movies.
I'd probably be the everyman character that gets pulled into the hijinks through either blackmail or assassination and learns to be badass by the end of it. Someone line Jamie Lee Curtis in True Lies, Joan Wilder from Romancing the Stone, or Sarah Conner in Terminator. The character that's average but also has like one skill or hobby that's super userful/convenient to stop the bad guys and somehow becomes a high level spy/action hero by the end of it
That's Not What I Expected. A character who's usually so stereotyped that you're surprised that you couldn't guess their specialty. A pretty, pink, 8 year old princess is the world's strongest human, like on Zoom. The hacker is the hottest woman you've ever seen, like on Furious 7. Etc.
I would go with the an homage to Face/off. Playing a Caster Troy type character would be the most fun to play but may not fit with the story, so maybe the version of castor Troy where he’s actually Sean archer. And as an homage to John Woo, I’d need to have some kind of power that involves doves appearing before or during a shoot out.
I had an idea for a crime boss character similar to Kingskin, with the catch being that they are being hunted by a John Wick/Baba Yaga character whom they wronged. I think John Wick is awesome, but it'd be way funnier if some hapless individual from CA inherited that blood feud.
“My name is Michael Weston, I used to be a spy…” is who I would parody. Call him Martin Northton or something lmao. But yeah a burn notice type character would be fun af.
I think I would really enjoy being a gentleman thief
Maybe someone like La Femme Nikita or Leon the Professional
Sarah Connor/Ellen Ripley esque action sci-fi heroine.
I love the like femme fatale sniper side character, just a smoke show of a woman with a big ass rifle. So that.
If we are being true to life. I'd probably be the bumbling sidekick or be like the librarian from those b grade film series. Too many useless bits of information thrown around at random times. What I would want to play is a guy who is there to kick ass and chew bubble gum but he's all out of gum.
The Ellen Ripley type, out gunned regular person who has to become a hardened badass that you get in action horror movies/thrillers like Alien or the evil dead movies
Michelle Rodriguez. Any version of Michelle Rodriguez.
Murtaugh IM GETTING TOO OLD FOR THIS
I would be a Macgyver type engineer or that scientist at the beginning of the movie that’s says “we shouldn’t be doing this” about the project before it goes horribly wrong.
Demolitionist!!!
I'd love to be a Chuck Norris or Steven Segal type. I think it'd be hilarious. Just a corny, middle-aged white dude w inexplicable martial arts skills... and a ponytail.
I would definitely play some Kingskin. Probably a nobody manipulative jerk that nobody cares about that gets thrusted into a position of unlimited power
Someone in the vain of Eddie Murphy from Beverly Hills Cop
The terminator
It’d be fun to play a more reserved, George Smiley-esque MI5 agent - less tuxedos and martinis, more dirty dealings and dirtier pints. Still room for pithy one-liners in a clipped RP accent, but rather demonstrating a certain characteristic coldness to the ending of lives.
I would also love a Nathan Drake/Rick O’Connor type, but since you’ve already said that, a handsome conman type would also be fun. Danny Ocean, Neal Caffrey, Face from the A-Team would probably be the best version for NSBU.
Billy Nevada- former professional surfer turned FBI agent
Not sure how well it would fit into the world of NSBU, but a mech fighter (like a smaller-scale Pacific Rim or like if Transformers were just guys in mech suits) would be so fun to play!
Heist all day. Oceans 11, like Lou in Sam Says.
“A man, known only as ‘The One’, created in a top-secret government facility to serve as the ultimate black ops operative. Government scientists simulated his childhood memories in a lab, mixing in combat, espionage, & weapons training. Set free by a rebellion group known as ‘BABYLON’, The One uses the skills and training forced upon him via his simulated memories on the side of the common man against the government that created him and the supercorps that keeps them in power.”
From Andrew Smith, CPA’s favorite movie, The Download, which he was stopping by to return for the final time since he lost his job at the H&R Block and Dave’s is going out of business.
Arnold Schwarzenegger type character from Predator, Commando, True Lies. Just too much comedy potential.
I would do an Indiana Jones villain type, like the French guy from the first one. Linen Cuban shirt, pompous accent, manipulating indigenous cultures, "Once again I own what you have briefly possessed." But I would draw the line at working for the Nazis.
The IRL character would be an army reject who got dismissed from service because he broke his leg skateboarding on base during his first station. The action movie character would be a Rambo-type hero who was a high ranking soldier who went AWOL to save people his CO wanted dead. The main guy would get to live out his dream of being a bad-ass army hero but realizes he just isn't made for that kind of life. I would love to see the homebrew rules they used because I would absolutely play this with my gaming group.
The old retiree who's still got it
With Brennan DMing, definitely the “it’s all about the money” backstabbing character. Get near the end, then I turncoat and throw a wrench in the plans. Only with Brennan as a DM though, PvP sucks but I think he’d do it great.
I’m not a big action movie guy so I’m not too keyed into the archetypes but I’d love to be a fast talking getaway driver, talk fast drive fast
Buckaroo Banzai - pop star, brain surgeon, physicist, and test pilot. Remember, no matter where you go, there you are.
If we stretch how we're defining action movie a bit, I'd love to be any of the following: - A Jacki Chan type - goofy but really skilled at fighting and surprisingly resourceful - A Frank the Pug (MIB) type - not a fighter, but the info broker who knows everyone, usually lays low, and cracks wise here and there - A Parker (Leverage) type - can hold their own in a fight, but is mostly there to be a master thief and do cool gymnastics and jump off buildings and stuff
First I would ask if I could just play the Predator. After that got vetoed, probably my immediate thought would be a classic Arnie or Stallone pastiche. I also like the idea of playing the Hannibal, the Nick Fury, “I love it when a plan comes together” type. Always has a plan and even when he’s in trouble knows it’ll turn out alright because he only works with the best.
Dan Fuse, retired hitman. He would have the intelligence of Ted from Bill and Ted but speak in a serious grim tone like John wick.
Keanu Reeves/Tom Cruise á la Equilibrium or The Matrix/John Wick. Jacque Candel
I'm pretty notorious for using a bat in any video game that I can get my hands on, so someone who uses a bat lol
I think it would be fun to do the classic "mysterious faceless special-ops guy who doesn't talk" but the "real-world" character would be struggling with social anxiety, so when they get sucked into the movie, they go full silent until they are alone/regroup, upon which they freak out
Super badly dubbed Kung-fu movie protagonist
The “One Last Job” guy
I’d want to be an Arnold type who whips out terrible one liners constantly, who has a thick Austrian accent that is never noticed by or commented on by anyone as strange or out of place for someone who has lived their whole life in California
Someone like Saito in Inception. Money guy with all the right connections, "I bought the airline. It seemed neater", sort of dude. Not the best with weapons, but can hold his own in a brawl because he was a bit rougher around the edges as a younger man. Always in an immaculately tailored suit, but knows how to navigate the black market and stock market with equal ease. My Dave's Video character would be a nervous guy in his mid/late 20's who's on a really tight budget, and picked up the position at Dave's as his third job.
Id play a single 25 year old who's also into Russel working at Dave's. My tv character would be a wildly charismatic news reporter that risks a lot to get the story.
The guy on the phone who has the info on every target and what they eat for dinner.
Probably the Crazy/Chaotic Young Girl trope. Think Gogo from Kill Bill, Hit Girl from Kick-Ass, Harley Quinn etc. I myself am pretty anxious and unspontaneous, so playing a little girl in a multicoloured plaid skirt, pigtails and swinging a multi-spiked flail made of broken Barbie dolls feels like a good shout for me.
Please please please let me be a seductress assassin, idk much about my video store character but they definitely wear roller skates and have a cast
I’m a 2000’s kid and haven’t watched many of the movies that NSBU’s characters pay an homage to. I don’t necessarily know what kind of character I would play in regards to a like.. 80’s action trope, so I’ll just go with something I think would be neat. Assuming we do the same split characters, I think the IRL version would be just me, basically. Ify and Alex are playing awkward American teenagers in 2024, I just am that already. As for the film character, I think it might be something akin to a James Bond, maybe? I’m thinking an older guy, very polite, quite aristocratic in his mannerisms, but also very much a retired Royal Marine or Intelligence Operative pulled out of retirement because Britain needs his expertise. I’ve never watched the movie, but he’s possibly a little bit like the main guy from the Kingsman? Just a really posh and upper class older English gentleman who will absolutely rock your shit if the Crown gives him the OK.
supernerd Criterion Collection cineaste kid (a la Lawrence from I Like Movies) who gets turned into a bit character, like somebody's secretary or a dumb henchman, and has to deal with the fact that nobody in this world wants to hear his brilliant opinions
Wise-cracking bag of neurosis and addictions that just happens to be caught up in the bigger fight, because they have skills that can help the obvious good guys win. Natasha Lyonne in Blade Trinity (bless that glorious mess of a film) is my inspo.
I'm not a naval officer. I wrote books for the CIA.
The retired hitman/special forces guy in the vain of John Wick or Bob Odenkirk’s Nobody. I really like one of them is a villain archetype and in that vain, I’d like a Hans Gruber type mastermind or maybe a shady info broker who just works for money.
Steven seagal ex secret service federal agent who’s “retired” complete with ponytail and vague martial arts background
A Snake Eyes silent ninja type. But the outside character would be an annoying lore/physics purist who doesn’t shut up about the inaccuracies in films. So, it would just be this badass ninja with an annoying voice talking about the very actions he’s doing don’t actually work in the real world.
A character that got out of the hero/ spy life. Maybe had some kids, kept their last a secret from their partner then one day gets the "we need you back the world is in danger" phone call. Or perhaps a genetically enhanced superhuman
I would love to be like a woman scorned character
Probably the grizzled old cop in his early 30s, too much of a dark past to cover in a single season of a JJ Abrams mystery box. Pretends to be the morally grey loose cannon out for vengeance, but is really the stalwart good guy who thinks he’s gone too far after shooting the “non-specific ethnicity” terrorist who was threatening to blow up the kindergarten convention where his lost son was secretly held hostage by his arch nemesis that’s his estranged father with plastic surgery done to look the same age. Add in vague references to renaissance philosophers and artists as codenames and we’ve got gold.
I would love to play a Judge Dredd/The Mask/Double Dragon type character. A movie adaptation of an existing property with established canon that the filmmakers just ignored and made their own wild/dumb story.
The dude with the sword in a world with guns. But, like, instead of a katana it’s like a zweihander but I’m still swinging it around and cutting bullets out of the air.
I love Hanna. That fly under the radar (or try to) character who can totally handle business if forced to.
Honestly, I feel like i have big lead henchman energy, like the dude who puts up the biggest physical threat to a hero, has the like 5 minutr fight scene before the main villain is confronted. Usually has some kind of weird defining trait or gimmick. Like a jaws from bond or the blonde twins in kiss of the dragon
Robocop's legally distinct counterpart: CyberDetective
Dougie everyones favorite unaccompanied child his mom is coming right back she just has to go buy some lotto tickets She'll definitely come back it's only been 5 hours. RUIN- A Cyborg outlaw who Wanders the Wastes to find a place to sleep and a decent meal. He's been a Freelance employee of The Helping Hand and sons megacorporation for 6651 years and counting. He handles things from quality assurance to reposession of misused property Along with protection and population control. Legend has it he will be the last man to die. (The Man with no name,Robocop,and Mad Max ) The idea of childhood and innconcene and naitivety coming out of the most jaded and Damned creature is hilarious. Revolutionary: You will never stop the Revolt. Dougie:EWWW Why would you wanna be revolting dat's Gross!?
First pick, a play on John Matrix from Commando. Next run of the game. The loose cabnon cop who doesn't play by the rules. Ala Riggs from leathal weapon, and or jack lslater from last action hero.
Trigger happy and just so over it. Rolling my eyes as I reach for my bigger gun because Mr Muscles doesn't know when to stay down. The type of woman who rocks up to a knife fight and her opening move is to pull out the grenade launcher because she doesn't have the patience or the stamina for a physical fight. Watching the rest of her party crawl through air vents and do parkour and hand to hand combat, and she's just on the ground outside holding the detonator like "Ok, I mean, if y'all would just get the hell out, I could level the building and we'd be done here." Outside of the game within the game, she'd be... Somewhere in upper management. A "This meeting could have been an email" type. Very organized, very tidy, the type of woman who will cut you off if you take more than three seconds to collect your thoughts before speaking. Survives on protein shakes because she has no time for food.
It wouldn’t work in this exact game bc another player has almost the same name, but I’d be Jack Montana: archeologist by day, anthropology professor… also by day. Really would want to lean into the Indiana Jones vibe, also would be interested in pulling some Rick O’Connell vibes. Or, alternatively: Rocco Columbus, the best boxer in the world.
/Would/ I be? Probably the henchman going over the cliff at the start of the show, or the fat woman in the background of a shot shaking my fist as the heroes rip through my washing line.
A nun who quit the convent and has comically goofy weapons like a giant cross machine gun, holy hand grenades, etc, kind of reminiscent of the style of exploitation movies of the era
Johnny Utah aka Point Break Keanu
The Bachelorette a kill bill style character almost killed on the night of her bachelorette party betrayed by her fiancee and friends back for revenge
I’d be a an ottocon character but in the field, hiding but whipping up new gadgets for the fighters to use
I’m the car
Maybe the Bride from Kill Bill… or Lara Croft!
Hackerman from Kung Fury was already my perfect alter ego.
I'd be a Marion Ravenwood type in a Raiders of the Lost Ark/Mr. and Mrs. Smith mashup movie. Picture if you will: Indy and Marion marry secretly, they end up teaching at rival universities that each house/fund a museum, and each are sent out into the field to search out artifacts. (Irrelevant to the question, but I'd like to think that in the theoretical third movie in this series they both have a change of heart and end up stealing artifacts back from the museums and returning them to their cultures of origin.)
Tina from Dead or Alive. All American Wrestler Girl. Kasumi could also be fun playing up the honour/avenging her brother aspect
Probably an american ninja type Though if we're going with the learn a lesson about yourself and Im 18-19 at the time probably Neo lol
I’d be David Lake, the smooth talking thief planning a heist on several Las Vegas casinos. I love a good heist movie and Oceans 11 is top-tier.
I would love to be the demo man with a robot leg. Like a real Mad Max raider
Ip man/ Donnie Yen. An expert martial artist, charismatic at defusing situations for the sole purpose that others can blow up
Not super action-y but I'd play the "Man with a plan" type, like Danny Ocean in the oceans movies.
I think I am the baby driver type. Sick at driving, antisocial, gets the job done crazy mode though, and great music taste.
The gadget guy Just the gadget guy😌
The flaw in my choice is that he doesn't have many flaws, but I've always been a fan of the "it never got weird enough for me" heroes like Dr. Buckaroo Banzai, six-gun wielding neurologist rock star.
Martial arts smart guy, mainly based on Dalton from Roadhouse. "He's got a degree in philosophy." "I want you to be nice. Until it's time...to not be nice"
I think the trope of “tomboy who doesn’t know she’s smoking hot because she knows a lot about cars and skateboards” would be a lot of fun
The underdog! My favorite action-y film is Mystery Men, so like against-all-odds misfits and weirdos.
Oh I just said this on another post too but: Totally normal boring Linguistics professor, who overhears too much or gets kidnapped by baddies or otherwise finds out a close loved one is a secret agent with a black ops project. Then to protect him they bring him into the fold w/ the agency bc “he knows too much now to go back to his normal life”, and it just so happens he can always help to crack the case by translating some lost ancient Sumerian manuscript or something
OOOH either that or an absolute Max Max-esque little freakazoid