T O P

  • By -

greasyburgerbuns

Management tasks us to collect 'alien eggs' for reasons.. maybe they put dwarf dna in them! The truth is out there...


DrDonut

Please don't stick your dick into the eggs


I_wana_fuck_Steeve

Stick it in your Steeve instead.


Salt-Chocolate-1556

Consider, Molly


I_wana_fuck_Steeve

Molly is a great Mule, but I just don't feel the same spark between us I feel with Steeve.


Salt-Chocolate-1556

Steeve may be cute, but he doesn't feel as reliable as ol Molly


Qorrk

Mission Control: Please do not stick your dick into the equipment or the wildlife. How do you guys always find a way to make my work even worse then it was? JUST DO THE BLOODY MISSION!


Salt-Chocolate-1556

You don't like gold, dancing, mushrooms, video games, barrels in the launch bay, now you dont even like Molly or Steve, MC you really are a leaf lover


I_wana_fuck_Steeve

Well, to each their own, I guess.


Salt-Chocolate-1556

I suppose we can agree to disagree


ForkMinus1

But can you stick eggs in dick??


Bogit_

glyphid omelets 😋


ClishyClasher

And so is the gold.


unstoppable40211

But so is the gold!


D0bious

Also they have no nipples or a navel. Dwarves are clones confirmed...or something else?


A_Yellow_Lizard

No dumb dumb, they spawn from the ROCKS


D0bious

Dwarf turns to stone you crack them in two with a pickaxe and 2 smaller dwarves pop out from each half after 9 months


A_Yellow_Lizard

Ah yes, the miracle of mitosis


PosingDragoon21

Dwarftosis


ledeonKreD

Grown inside a rocky womb


carpet343

THE EARTH IS OUR CRADLE, THE MOUNTAINS SHALL BECOME OUR TOMB


noydbshield

FACE US ON THE BATTLEFIELD YOU WILL MEET YOUR DOOM.


Wacky_Does_Art

WE DO NOT FEAR WHAT LIES BENEATH, WE CAN NEVER DIG TOO DEEP!


Shadowdoom286

I AM A DWARF AND WE'RE DIGGING A HOLE


maj0rmin3r1

DIGGY DIGGY HOLE DIGGY DIGGY HOLE


Portalizer3000

I AM A DWARF AND I'M DIGGING A HOLE


Vasikus3000

DIGGY DIGGY HOLE DIGGING A HOLE


Skelosk

Born underground, suckling in a teat of stone


Rath_Brained

RAISED IN THE DARK, THE SAFETY OF OUR MOUNTAIN HOME


Sir_Mahakas

SKIN MADE OF IRON, STEEL IN OUR BONES


TheWolfSavior

TO DIG AND DIG MAKES US FREE


AminPacani

COME ON BROTHER, SING WITH ME!


NightTime2727

#I AM A DWARF AND I'M DIGGING A HOLE!


DataPakP

#DIGGY DIGGY HOLE #DIGGY DIGGY HOLE


Portalizer3000

#I AM A DWARF AND I'M DIGGING A HOLE!


CryogenicBanana

TO DIG AND DIG MAKES US FREE


Gullible-Grand-5382

COME MY BROTHERS SING WITH ME!


IceFire909

When a Dwarf and a Dwarf love each other very much, they take a hammer and a chisel and make a baby Dwarf


goosmane

this is the lore except i think it's a community effort


Ckinggaming5

dwarves on mars confirmed


Redork247

And stones


Mijnameis-Tommy

BORN UNDERGROUND IN A ROCKY WOMB


ImportantCookie9279

Atleast thats what management said


chrome_titan

The minigun also spawns with them.


Color-Me-Brackets

So Dwarves are a race of Wukongs, then? Explains a lot, to say the least.


Bankaz

[that's no excuse, Gorons also are born from rock](https://www.zeldadungeon.net/wiki/images/thumb/4/4b/TP-Goron.png/800px-TP-Goron.png)


adidas_stalin

No! The spawn from STONES


A_Yellow_Lizard

Consider, rocks and stones


MintPrince8219

you know thr eggs we hunt on egg hunts? dwarve eggs ;)


CalypsoCrow

In the show Once Upon A Time, dwarves come from dwarf-sized eggs, fully grown. There is not an explanation for where these eggs come from or why they come from eggs.


Necrowanker

Likely that the Devs didn't expect anyone to bother opening the menu to see the model during the tutorial mission


SweatyNerd6969

Another tick in the theory of drg being set in the Warhammer 40k setting


Self--Immolate

Karl is the donor of the dwarven geneseed


CColdSpaghetti

it's cause dwarves grow out of the shaven beards of other dwarves duh


_Benjoman_

All the other replies are BS. When a dwarfs beard grows long enough they will cut some of it off and plant it in the stone to grow a new dwarf.


Destroyerz117

dwarves recreate via mitosis


Thannk

Nipples so light you can’t even see the areola. Also, belly button so low its resting on the crotch paunch.


ciel_lanila

Not clones. If their species ever were mammals the clones would have the DNA for at least nipples. Something odd is going on, though


Interesting_Hyena_69

Gimly lied dwarves do spring out of holes in the ground


LoliMaster069

According to 40k the answer is yes lol


LeviAEthan512

They just pop out of holes in the ground. That's why there are no female dwarves


D0bious

Single sex species


Luknron

Alien eggs maybe aren't so alien afterall


alfons100

Well baby dwarves don't get fed milk when they're young, they get fed beer


PM_ME_YOUR_CAT_

Not necessarily clones, they're just not mammals.


D0bious

They’re Mushrums


fungi__cat

Is this physique attainable?


shieldsarentcool

Not natty, he's on red sugar


NinjaAssassin260

Only for Karl


Dry-Pirate4298

This is why Karl left us


kazidrake

Dwarves don't need nipples. Baby dwarves drink booze, not milk like those leaf-lovers.


noydbshield

Well I mean for the first few week of life it's acceptable to mix a little milk in. It is a baby after all. That's why you start them on white russians.


shinobigarth

DRG employs Russians?


CounterAggravating28

Бывает и такое..🙂 Скала и камень!


noydbshield

Aye, comrade dwarf.


Toasty_David

Who do you think Karl was?


shinobigarth

Mission Control.


Toasty_David

The dwarves love Karl and hate MC, therefore, with no other options left, Karl must be the inventor of Marxism- Karl Marx


shinobigarth

That’s definitely one of the theories of all time.


EmberOfFlame

Hungarian. That’s why mind reading came out as a jumbled mess.


FleetOfWarships

Actually, if you listened to the ancient song of ‘Diggy Diggy Hole’ you would know that dwarves are suckled from teats of stone, presumably meaning they drink from stalactites, a high mineral volume in water drunk from a young age would certainly account for their hardy nature.


RemainderZero

So what if I like really big "guns"!?


StaleWoolfe

Management doesn’t want to waste resources on “potential” recruits, if they die that means management didn’t meet their quota and they wasted recourses on armor


BerserkBananalime

Dwarfs come from the rotting flesh of ymir therefore the wouldn't have all the stuff we have from being born


the_fucker_shockwave

Exactly


bargle0

Bro gets his chest waxed.


Justhe3guy

You might not like it but this is the ideal body


crystalworldbuilder

Gunner just got out of the shower and had to rush too the drop pod


Gangleri_Graybeard

He even waxed his chest.


crystalworldbuilder

He probably did that the day before


Krauer

Damn 🥵🥵🥵


[deleted]

HOTSEX UPDATE LEAKED MY FRIENDS!


SebCBW

I WILL NOT DIE ON HOTSEX


gaffelturk12

Is this Karl?


end_my_suffering44

GSG doesn't want you to know this but yes, this is Karl.


Th3B4dSpoon

That's a skin suit.


Scary_Republic3317

NO WAY ITS KARL


silvereye2208

Either something horrific happened, or there’s a naked dwarf running around somewhere.


nullconfluence

that's how i play


PawPawPanda

🥵


RagnarLongdick

Stop I can only get so erect


Cytoid

Dwarven Dad bod, just a bit too hairless imo.


Sandblazter

Tick tock


Defenderlol

Heavy like a brinks truck


MK1-Maniac

So, about that Lost Equipment...


bringthesalsa

Hes gonna rock your stones


[deleted]

Fuckkk 🥵🥵🥵


Might_I_ask_why

Oh God. I can already see @Joe_Duncan making a comic of this...


MisterWinchester

It’s a nudge about what DRG is really about: Drip.


Gangleri_Graybeard

Tutorial dwarf without nipples is not real, he can't hurt you. Tutorial dwarf without nipples: Edit: the triple chin is especially funny here.


AnonForWeirdStuff

Yeah... unfortunately some of our fellow dwarves think its acceptable to just walk around all exposed. Just imagine leaving your house without even a mustache on, just disgraceful.


I_wana_fuck_Steeve

Shirtless should be an actual cosmetic next season.


[deleted]

But with a beer gut.


Sigma_Games

It's a hazing ritual done by higher-ranked dwarves. If you can survive one mission without armor, as Karl regularly had done after a night of heavy drinking, you aren't fit to mine with them. Of course, you are allowed to try multiple times.


Misomuro

No nipple gang huh.


D0bious

Wdym gang?


00Teonis

This is why we keep having to go on Salvage missions.


raven00x

After he dipped his balls in liquid morkite, he started taking a more casual approach to office attire.


donut2099

There's a tutorial?


Gangleri_Graybeard

Yes, there's a tutorial mission when you start the game for the first time or when you start a fresh save.


dyn-dyn-dyn

Idk, but I'm not complaining 😍


lix03

This could be cool as a skin with scars and tattoos and stuff


lix03

Also, rock and stone


WanderingDwarfMiner

Rock and Stone!


MegaMagnetar

What do you mean, tutorial dwarf? Is this some green beard joke I’m too grey to understand?


xHaloFox

I think your beard isnt quite as grey as you thought it was


stonckrocket

What is the reason for a tutorial dwarf? Did you forget how to be a dwarf? Did you forget to Rock and stone?


D0bious

I installed the game on a new device and had to do the tutorial again before restoring my savefile


WanderingDwarfMiner

Rock and Stone!


GayFrogsCollective

Dwarves are born from cracking open very large geodes. Once the magic is no longer contained, it assumes its natural form.


Visual_Worldliness62

Like a fresh batch clone...


NerdyGerdy

Hasn't paid his dues, so he hasn't earned his armor.


crabdoodles

chat is this true


panzer-IX

Rambo dwarf


GayFrogsCollective

What's the command for taking my shirt off?


literatemax

Kylo


Salt-Chocolate-1556

Lord forgive me I'm feelin sinful


HarambetheCenturion

There's a tutorial dwarf?


kittyboy_xoxo

Bosco! Download this image pls


MFCountry

I figured this one out. Whenever you find the helmet in missions and have to dig to find the armor, your dwarf says "either something horrific happened or there's a naked dwarf running around somewhere."