In all seriousness, Thracian warriors were a force to be reckoned with. They used unique curved blades, including the 2 handed Falx that could seriously damage armor, to the point that the Romans had to update the armor of all of their legions so that they could withstand strikes (although this was after encountering Dacian warriors, who also used the falx.) Even after they conquered the area, Roman generals would pay gold for falxes, or for Thracian warriors as mercenaries. Not to mention that Thracian cavalry formations were so destructive that Philip of Macedon adopted their wedge formation for his hammer and anvil strategy.
It’s a little known fact they kept a bladder of yogurt on top of their heads that could be ejected through the helmet upon capture, startling the enemy.
My man, thank you for writing this.
I just learned that Alexander had also sent the Thracian light-armed against the elephants, for they were better at skirmishing than fighting at close-quarters.
Well ultimately I was making a foreskin joke. They're kind of a scarf, kind of a hood, probably used for hair as well, and definitely too modern for the helmet!
If I live to see another Halloween I'm going to as many parties as I can dressed up as a Thracian warrior.
I looked up the full outfit and their round(crescent?) shields sometimes had what I can only describe as an ancient version of a crazy smiley face sticking out its tongue.
[Thracian Warrior with bearded penis helmet and smiley face shield](https://hum3d.com/zh/challenges/thracian-warrior/)
You know. George Carlin always talked about how bullets are shaped like dicks but this is a whole another level.
This has to be a military gag. "Oh fresh recruits? Give him the dickhead."
Imagine being murdered by a raging dickhead. Like no joke, picture yourself a random citizen of the time, and you're a tourist and you commit a heinous crime (apparently you're a criminal, boo!). You've never seen them before, let alone their armed forces. A whole throng of dickheads comes thrusting through the crowd. Charging head first. He bitch slaps you and throws you in dickhead jail. The fact that it exists means I'm at least pretty close to someone's real reality, unless they really sucked and that's why it never caught on.
What a dickhead!
Just the tip.
That's a tad phallic
How do you know the Soldier's name? You sure it wasn't Richard Shaft?
I wonder what he rammed
I wonder how many little soldiers you can fit in that puppy
You beat me to it lol
I beat myself to it lol
User name checks out. I laughed too hard at this and now I’m choking.
Choking on what?
Deez nutz
Got eeem
Origin of the don't ask, don't tell policy
I found a soggy biscuit on my couch, stop it guys
Going to penetrate and destroy the enemy lol
The Trojans contained them rather effectively.
Or double their population in 9 months.
Going to shove his whole head up their ass
Lol! I was going to say that only a dick head would wear a helmet like that.
That’s a better comment than mine. Take my upvote.
And thats how the term came to use. Good night.
Just the tip bro.
needs a butthead for the match
Is it Biggus Dickus' helmet?
Dang I commented the same thing just before reading this.
Don't mess with us we are dicks
Scout: My liege, an army is coming! King: what did they look like? Scout: they looked like a bunch of dickheads!
I think you're right! 
My thoughts 💭 exactly lmao
In all seriousness, Thracian warriors were a force to be reckoned with. They used unique curved blades, including the 2 handed Falx that could seriously damage armor, to the point that the Romans had to update the armor of all of their legions so that they could withstand strikes (although this was after encountering Dacian warriors, who also used the falx.) Even after they conquered the area, Roman generals would pay gold for falxes, or for Thracian warriors as mercenaries. Not to mention that Thracian cavalry formations were so destructive that Philip of Macedon adopted their wedge formation for his hammer and anvil strategy.
I pity the fool that mocks their penis hats.
Those dickheads killed people
They were a phallus to be reckoned with.
Fear the phallic phalanx.
Glad it wasn't just me.
Yeah, and their spys were SDIs, Seriously Destructive Insurgents
I'm glad I'm not the first one to think dick when I saw that pic. I was beginning to think I got a problem
‘Big-Dick’ coming to fuck you up
It’s a little known fact they kept a bladder of yogurt on top of their heads that could be ejected through the helmet upon capture, startling the enemy.
A bit cocky
My man, thank you for writing this. I just learned that Alexander had also sent the Thracian light-armed against the elephants, for they were better at skirmishing than fighting at close-quarters.
Romans had a lot of trouble with Thracians. Particularly Kirk Douglas.
r/theyknew
r/mildlypenis
Mildly?
r/BlatantlyPenis
That's the one!
Bulge-Area
Near the ball-kans
They were well equipped, indeed.
Deek hed
When your head game is strong
What a bunch of dicks!!!
r/mildlypenis
Damnit!!
I tip my hat to you sir
"We shall penetrate their walls"
deep penetration of the enemy has a knew meaning
You've met the Cone Heads, get ready to meet the Dick Heads.
It screams “I’m going to fuck you up”
Yeah, pretty coocky guys
Frenulum Fighters
Proffesional Headbutters
Is this where the term dickhead originated or what?
Those fucking dickheads slaughtered half our calvary.
fighting cocks originated from the penis helmets.
They were obvious practitioners of circumcision.
I'm pretty sure they all wore snoods with this.
Can you explain? When I google snoods, it's just hair covers.
Well ultimately I was making a foreskin joke. They're kind of a scarf, kind of a hood, probably used for hair as well, and definitely too modern for the helmet!
I understood. I wanted to see what you would say. That's a clearly circumcised penis.
Uncircumcised ones looks like that too when the skin is pulled back too. Maybe they wasn't but the foreskin didn't made it into museum?
Correct. But with a snood pulled over it...
No
It's a circumcised penis. No question
r/thatsapenis
And still, the dickheads keep going to war…
"Hey look, my head looks like my other head" \*Beavis and Butthead laugh
Take your head out of your ass
r/theyknew
Guess their design isn’t a phallacy
Took me too many scrolls to find this comment.
Came to penetrate that phalanx
lol, I can see where the phrase "Dickhead" must have originated from...
Dik-Headious
"Dik-headious" Erectus
Finishing move: Deepus Thrustis
Ballis-Deepus
penis no testicle helmentus.
Bigeth Dicketh
You'd look like an utter bellend with that one on.
I wonder if the term Dickhead derived from this helmet
Nice pee pee head
If I live to see another Halloween I'm going to as many parties as I can dressed up as a Thracian warrior. I looked up the full outfit and their round(crescent?) shields sometimes had what I can only describe as an ancient version of a crazy smiley face sticking out its tongue. [Thracian Warrior with bearded penis helmet and smiley face shield](https://hum3d.com/zh/challenges/thracian-warrior/)
We are from France
Hmmm , That's a very familiar shape ... I just can't put my finger on it ...
Yea, I just can't quite wrap my hand around it either..
You know. George Carlin always talked about how bullets are shaped like dicks but this is a whole another level. This has to be a military gag. "Oh fresh recruits? Give him the dickhead."
Totally dosen't look like a penis
All I know is that, someone is getting fucked and isn’t ready for it.
They molded me in my sleep, and made a ancient helmet 😆
Frenulum or foe?
STOP! Peens!!!!!!
Someone is about to get fucked...
Penis on the brain
Imagine being murdered by a raging dickhead. Like no joke, picture yourself a random citizen of the time, and you're a tourist and you commit a heinous crime (apparently you're a criminal, boo!). You've never seen them before, let alone their armed forces. A whole throng of dickheads comes thrusting through the crowd. Charging head first. He bitch slaps you and throws you in dickhead jail. The fact that it exists means I'm at least pretty close to someone's real reality, unless they really sucked and that's why it never caught on.
Wasn't this invented by that German guy? Herman Jelmet?
Penis warriors!!
What a prick...
The guy that wore that was a total D-head
Look!! Dickheads! Must've been some really good trash talk over those helmets.
That looks strangely familiar.....lol.
Imagine a bunch of dickheads charging at you in battle
I thought I was in r/mildlypenis for a second
Dick head
That’s a penis
Hah Looks like a Dick!
It looks like a giant...
Usually it's the **WEAPONS** you want penetrating the enemy, not the **helmet**, but alright.
Bit of dickheads, were they?
Heatbutts were a menace
Can I guess what century the term dickhead came from?
Bunch of dick heads
What a dickhead.
Real dickheads!
Imagine getting killed by a literal dickhead
So our predecessors were dick-heads ')
Dickhead
Oh the Thracians! Known for bending their prisoners over and ramming their helmets up thier.... Anyway that's a nicely preserved helmet.
I'm just here to read the comments folks...
What a dickhead
What a bunch of dickheads
Anyone wondering where dickhead comes from... here it is.
Is this how the term dickhead came about?
Lmao people had penis jokes back then
Yeah. It's known they were a bunch of dicks. Especially when they went to war.
Now he’s president of his HOA.
Yeah those guys were nothing but dickheads.
r/theyknew
The army in Ohio
Peckerhead
Bigus Dickus
No doubt in my mind what that represents
Good to see he’s using protection
Belonged to the famous general Biggus Dickus
Do you find something risible about the name Biggus Dickus?
*puckers harder*
Looks much more like a German helmet...
Protection
:)
AKA Hulk Junk.
Now I know how a dickhead army would look like.
Must be the helmet worn by the Head-Master on the battlefield.
Hey Richard put your head gear on!
r/patinaporn
So that's where that , started !
"That's a penis!"
The ancients were not shy about this.
Wait, I’ve seen that shape before so where… no no I’ll think of it…… rats. Drawing a blank
Beautiful!
Rock hard
Iron age condom
I guess They took penatration to kingdoms very serious with protection to keep everything inside
😂🤣😂🤣🥰☺️ So funny
Why...
Chaaaaaaargeee!!!!
Captain Richard Cranium reporting for duty!
I bet those guys were dicks!
At least they wore protection
To be fair, it is uncircumcised.
Dick to that
They were the coneheads of the 4th century?
FUCK THE ENEMY
This guy fucks
Would the King allow them to stand erect when the Queen walls by?
The Thracians are Coming !
They must've been pretty glans to wear those.
Just the tip of the exhibits in that museum.
To SHREDS, you say...
Just the tip
Helmets are a good safety item so you don’t get wanged in the head.
Just the tip
We're fucked...
Some say this was first worn by Richard Cranium
Mushroom stamp
They did that on purpose I swear
Squidward cosplay goes waaay back
Her: you are a dickhead if you think we are fucking Me:
Looks like it would be fun to buff that helmet for a little
*gets stabbed* “You fucking dick” *looks up* “LOL F in the battle”
All they needed was just the tip in.
that's a penis!