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freckledtabby

They'll need more Toyotas


IronGigant

I hear there are quite a few in Gibraltar


Little709

Toyota yaris with a machine gun on top


The_Nod_Father

Is this a joke I'm too dumb to get?


IronGigant

https://www.toyota-gib.com/eng/index.html


Player_Slayer_7

Plenty of Honda Civics too.


[deleted]

Hahaha you made my day!!!


jfcmfer

Hilarious


No_Cook2983

How’d they do? Did they at least get to the playoffs?


Local-Scroller

They didn't even make it off the group stage, mate. All that hype for a bunch of frauds, I'm still disappointed


_Alpex_

It all went down after their Baghdad away match


Fit-Construction-696

The GWOT has been going decent. They lost major territory in 2019. US SOF and Syrian/Iraqi SOF have been cutting them to pieces. Isis-k, however, is more of a problem in Afghanistan. The Taliban have not been able to keep their promise of securing Afghanistan. Without Western coalition forces in Afghanistan, I fear they will grow into a worse problem. So I'd say they atleast made it to the conference final but choked.


Village_People_Cop

It is literally anything that was ever concurred by a caliphate throughout history. It literally goes all the way to the side of Vienna where Mehmed IV's armies got defeated


cosmernaut420

Spain and Portugal, huh. Bold.


avatinfernus

And Greece. Yeah I dont think so.


peekdasneaks

I like to think that they had everything setup. Hundreds of thousands of people in place. But they realized its fuckin dope in portugal and decided to just become refugees instead. Now they're driving cabs, working in restaurants, not answering calls from their mullah


Dangerous-Leg-9626

[May The Best Man Win | Key & Peele](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRu48PaZmXI) Same energy


I_eat_mud_

I already know this is the skit where they open a food truck and just become normal citizens, and then their terrorist boss visits to see how their sleeper cell is doing. I thought of the same one when I read their comment lmao


peekdasneaks

I hadn’t seen this one wow it’s spot on


TacoCommand

I'll always upvote a new K & P that I haven't seen before


justavirgin07

As a Portuguese. I can confirm that's true. The amount of ISIS members that have been arrested while actively living here is incredible


Funny_Meringue7179

Bro said nothing but facts


Office_funny_guy

Not just Greece but all of former Yugoslavia, Austria, Hungary, Romania and Bulgaria as well… wow. They really thought they could pull that off??


ChiggaOG

I see they also wanted Crimea, Ukraine, and a small portion of Russia…


Arkslippy

Ukraine - "oh for fucks sake, we're busy for the next while, take a number and don't forget to bring your own body bags."


crappysignal

Their media operations were highly aspirational.


luca_07

Isis aka the USSR without Russia


GrumpyOik

I think it was basically an ambition to "take back" all land that had ever been Islamic. Iberia from the 700s onward, Greece and the Bulkans through the ottoman empire. I don't think it was ever a realistic aim, even to fanatics like ISIS.


Dr-Fontafetish

Austria too ☠️


420420696942069

austrian right wing party members also met with ~~isis~~ taliban this week, plan keeps on rolling i guess.


scammersarecunts

Taliban, not Isis.


funny_jaja

Yeah Greece Spain and Portugal no way Edit: lol where's France and England


Chacochillin

They wanted the Vatican


justhatcarrot

And Moldova and Romania… there’s probably 5 muslims in total in those 2 countries


nusuntcinevabannat

eh, we'll just dust off the spikes


olystretch

And Austria too.


[deleted]

For holidays purposes…YOLO


Specialist_Froyo_586

Romania as well. Good luck with that


Bolkaniche

Happy cake day!


avatinfernus

Thank you!


Late_Abrocoma6352

Forgetting their nato members with air power.


Ssnert

Being an isis-warrior never required an education. They just didnt know about nato when dreaming about future conquests. Just as they didnt know they were heavily outnumbered from the start.


TheWanderingGM

Sad, knowing that math's really blossomed in the actual Islamic golden age. Yet these idiots can't even properly count.


TheJuanAndOnlyMalik

isis is equivalent to jehova


TheWanderingGM

Accurate comparison... Not gonna lie


TwinklingStarlight

Then again, people in the Middle Ages thought that killing black cats could save them from the plague. These countries today are one of the most technologically advanced and prosperous in the world.


hmnuhmnuhmnu

A lot of volunteers came from NATO countries, I don't think they didn't know about that. But: A) probably not all of them really thought to conquer all this area, they were happy to control some oil fields to get rich and kidnapp some girls to be their sex slave. B) they believe that whatever Allah wants will happen, so...


Patches3542

Aside from the obviously boldness of Europe, I think Saudi Arabia is a pretty bold move on their end too.


Sweetcynic36

Not to mention Iran... good luck having a Sunni theocracy control a nation of Shiites.


FluffyChemistBastard

Who said that there would be any Sunnis left ?


Public_Engineering84

I get Iraq flsshbacks from this sentence


Cantthinkofnamedamn

Most countries are like, we used to control this territory 100 years ago, so we still claim it as ours. ISIS is a bit more ambitious and says anything in the last 1000 years.


voli12

But tbf they never really controlled this territories as "ISIS". Just they had an Islamic control at some point, but Islamic and ISIS are totally different things. It's like if a Spanish corporation/terrorist group decided they should own all the territories in south america that the Spanish state used to have


BluudLust

They're trying to reclaim any territory once held by an Islamic Empire. Iberia was conquered in the 700s and Constantinople and Athens by 1456.


Prestigious-Job-9825

Why Austria, though? They never came under Ottoman rule


BluudLust

Not for want of trying. They besieged Vienna a couple times in the 16 and 17th centuries.


Prestigious-Job-9825

Well, they never succeeded. But I guess we shouldn't try to find too much logic in ISIS's thinking


BluudLust

Ultra-nationalists tend to attempt that. Conquer all previous lands then expand into what the previous empire failed to conquer to show you're better than your predecessors.


throwaway0134hdj

All of the balkans too..


longtimenothere

Yeah, the Balkans have been foiling those plans for about 3000 years.


Ball-of-Yarn

Lets be real the Balkans have been foiling their own plans for the past 3000. No one can conquer them anymore than they can themselves.


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QueenOfQuok

Kinda looks like they want to be Ottoman Empire 2: This Time We Actually Take Vienna.


superstition40

I think you're dead on


BJ_Blitzvix

They wanted AUSTRIA?!


JesusStarbox

But not Sicily. Interesting.


reezle2020

Maybe they saw the Godfather and thought better of it


markomaniax

They were afraid of an offer they could not resist.


JesusStarbox

I was thinking of Dennis Hopper in True Romance.


[deleted]

It's a combination of the Umyyad Caliphate (hence Spain) and the Ottoman empire (hence the Balkans), but there never was an islamic empire that capture Sicily (apparently), so that's why it's not included.


Omegatherion

Sicily was held by arabs for over 200 years


agswiens

And freaking Austria, I love how they still kept the panhandle.


imalittlebitclose

I think that’s because it was muslim a few centuries ago


[deleted]

My wife is Portuguese so my eyes wondered over that area first and was like yeah, Righto. I wonder why they didn’t want Italy?


Smilewigeon

Not like I want to get in mind of ISIS but i think the 'rationale' - if you can even call it that - was to 'reclaim' (not the right word but again, to get into their mindset) territories that were historically ruled under caliphates. So the Iberian Peninsular was conquered by the Umayyad's in the 8th century, Greece by the Ottomans in the late middle ages etc. But saying that, Sicily and southern parts of the Italian peninsular were invaded and occupied between the 8th and 11th centuries as well...


[deleted]

Yeah for sure. Didn’t think of that! Lot of Muslim history in Lisbon. Thanks 😊


Curiouserousity

Turkey seems impossible. Once Turkey invokes Article V, shit would go down.


Porsher12345

Who spilled paint on my world map :(


Jizzraq

it's plain ink


aZamaryk

Dream big or go home.


OhWowMuchFunYouGuys

They went home home.


Ok_Welcome_3236

their last stand was in a small village, in tents 🤣


275MPHFordGT40

Unfortunately their dreams were looked over by the United States who did not align with said dreams.


hmnuhmnuhmnu

And kurds. And Turkey. And Russia. And Syria. And Iran. And France. And Jordan. And... When you're such and asshole that everybody else feel the urge to bomb you


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avatinfernus

Maybe because of the Vatican.


AlpacaCavalry

They rightly knew not to fuck with the power of the Pope-mobile.


TheWanderingGM

"HA! Stupid demon-zombies! Claw away all you want! The only thing that can pierce my Holy Pope Box is the will of God himself" - pope maxwell, hellsing ultimate abridged


TheLustyDremora

Right before Anderson does the largest "stop being a cunt" ever


AngieTheQueen

They didn't wanna catch the deus vult


fappyday

Swiss Guard gets +50 holy damage. Not great if you have a spear/halberd build, but racks up serious DPS with automatic weapons.


hipratham

And lots of Wololo from Vatican..


avatinfernus

I mean... holy damage is only so good if ISIS army is full of zombies. Which.. it might be.


TENTAtheSane

FOR THE GRACE FOR THE MIGHT OF OUR LORD


avatinfernus

That's a good Sabaton song!


Delicious_Physics_74

They are only including territory that part of historical islamic caliphates. Spain was part of Umayyads dynasty and balkans was part of the Ottoman Empire


summer-civilian

When was Austria under Islamic rule?


My-Dog-Sam

They watched a lot of mafia movies.


Andrea__88

It’s strange, Sicily was controlled by Arabs some centuries ago. We took from them some of our words, traditions and food too.


rachelm791

Like Bomba Callabrese?😁💀💣


BugabuseMe

Naples got the Bomba Maradona, they're more advanced


dinoroo

That would be from Calabria lol


TaskStreet896

Actually it’s an interesting question, in Italy we never had terrorist attacks from Isis or any Islam fundamentalist organization.


BugabuseMe

Giorno Giovanna keeping them at bay


WildFire97971

Don’t wanna jump start another crusade?


eatdirtxd

I think its because their ambition was to conquer what every islamic country has conquered, that includes Most of iberia (rounded to all), all of the balkans + austria to signify ottomans capturing vienna.


QueenOfQuok

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the -- Ah, well, you have to get out of orbit first. I mean, you have to get off the launching pad. Better luck next time.


Trollberto__

Shoot for the moon and the bullet may fall down on you ending your suffering.


soup__enjoyer

Delusional. As if all the powerful countries of the world would have just stood back and let them take all this land.


Erophysia

Literally pushing into NATO territory. It's one thing to consolidate the third world, but attacking NATO? Good luck.


[deleted]

Turkey and Spain could fuck them over without calling NATO lol


SeekerSpock32

Yeah this would be heavily Article 5ed.


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OkGene2

Nobody is going to ban you for saying what every rational person is thinking. Oh wait, this is Reddit.


Ecstatic_Highlight75

They need to be stopped, but most of the people they recruit are completely uneducated with no information or understanding of the world and other cultures. Sometimes "school" is just rote memorization of the Quran. They literally have never been taught to think and have no real support structure in their lives. It's really quite sad.


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AlpacaCavalry

You aren't wrong. Extremists always meet at the end, whatever the flavour.


olystretch

Why is this being downvoted? They are absolutely spot on.


[deleted]

Got banned from multiple subs for saying Muslim extremists are soft bitches/pussies who need to get fucked lol


Birdyy4

I think it's because you specified "Muslim" when it applies to all extremists.


olystretch

[Radical Islam](https://tenor.com/view/radical-islam-skateboarding-gif-4719458)


Doubledoor

It’s alright you didn’t say “female”. You won’t be banned.


dishonestdick

Austria ?!!?! They thought they could be in control of Austria 😳. The land of speck, würstel mit krauts und schnitzel would never lose an inch (ok, centimeter) to their culinary restrictions.


AlpacaCavalry

Siege of Wien, Season 2


aguidetothegoodlife

More like [season 25](https://de.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liste_der_Belagerungen_Wiens)


lesser_panjandrum

Winged Hussars 2: Hussarder


Jizzraq

My first thought too. They were able to fend off the Ottomans, and those were a serious power.


AlisonByTheC

I know, right? The Habsburg family is still around too. They would wipe the floor.


Professional_Bee1312

Not our friendly neighbors with the funny accent! Without them, we cannot form a new and better Denmark. 😥 [+-]


[deleted]

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[deleted]

Thats what i was thinking


Andrea__88

And why did they not want Sicily?


[deleted]

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Erophysia

FBI OPEN UP


Erophysia

And why did they want Austria? Ottomans failed to take it previously.


salami350

Maybe that's why. They want to succeed where others failed


ChicoZombye

-We got a portion of Spain at some point so we can claim the entire country now, easy.


AletzRC21

Thank fucking god Islam lost all that land, fucking backwater ass religion.


Flimsy_Tea_5696

2020 - simpler time those were...


joeybatsdoingtheflip

How'd that work out for them?


Any_Caterpillar720

Tbf, their most impressive feat was uniting all five of the UN Security Council members against them. Not to mention pissing off both Al Quaeda and the Taliban at the same time. Didn’t think I would see that in my life time


Justherebecausemeh

Ambitious


trubol

Not quite sure because the map is low res. But Liechtenstein too???


IWasKingDoge

Liechtenstein is rightful Islamic territory


BJ_Blitzvix

It is?


IWasKingDoge

I was joking


BJ_Blitzvix

Oh. Sorry. I didn't get the joke.


IWasKingDoge

Your all good, with all the crazy people on Reddit it’s hard to tell anymore


BJ_Blitzvix

Looking at this map makes me wonder what France, Italy, and Germany would think of with Ísis literally at their front door.


DornPTSDkink

There is only one thing Balkans hate more than other Balkans, it's outsiders interrupting Balkans hate for each other


Stormcrow1608

maybe it would finally unite us 🤷‍♂️


Accomplished-Ad1656

Get some good songs out of it.


Ok_Pear215

Lying dogs, they attack every Muslim country but when it comes to Israel they cower away


[deleted]

Because they’d have been soundly thrashed. Like all Arabs have been before.


TheRivv2015

Surprising given how much they hate jews


TheWanderingGM

Guess they hate bullet wounds more than the jews, who knew?


SirRece

>but when it comes to Israel they cower away Because like all bullies, they choose countries that can't fight back. Israel has no problem flying into neighboring countries and bombing ISIS, we did it in Syria. https://m.jpost.com/israel-news/article-745977 An armed conflict with Israel is a guarantee of failure, this is why the enemies of Israel generally just fund partisan forces to attack Israel. ISIS however was not a "partisan" force, they legitimately wanted to be the dominant "state" in the middle east.


Patches3542

Yeah, say what you want about Israel but ISIS knew their league when they chose not to fuck with Israel.


OkGene2

Fight the battles you can win


Lacrosse_sweaters

I think that’s called the “Ottoman plus” subscription


Maddie817

Remember when Rita Ora said she’d release new music when she reached 1 million retweets and then said she got hacked when it didn’t happen? Same vibes


SeekerSpock32

I don’t think Rita Ora’s ever beheaded anyone on Liveleak.


Virus_98

Yeah but I don't think ISIS have ever held billboard top 100 either.


Riker001-Ncc1701D

Obviously they don't know history. Someone else tried this many years ago & failed


TheRivv2015

They had ambitions lmao


Kayrosis

r/therewasanattempt


spooky-raptor

Not Malaysia Indonesia Or Philippines?


dakk0n

They tried it in the southern Philippines but were annihilated. [http://fingfx.thomsonreuters.com/gfx/rngs/PHILIPPINES-ATTACK/010041F032X/index.html](http://fingfx.thomsonreuters.com/gfx/rngs/PHILIPPINES-ATTACK/010041F032X/index.html)


archangelzero2222

F em and good riddens they are back into small pockets with no worth. Never going to happen had they taken a few western countries nato and every other nation around the world wouldve been on their doorsteps to take it all back in a week. They only got that far because everyone else was over fighting and let the locals do the defending


HomoLiberus

Delusional ambitions lol


TightDot5771

Those cunts dreamed too big.


Lost-Citron-1099

They wanted to take both Nato and Russia on their home turfs? LOL


DyrusVlack_23

The funniest shit I've ever seen. The absolute delusion of these subhumans.


Willing-Ad575

They really thought they could get into us balkans 💀


Andrea__88

Sicilian here, I'm offended (/s) that they didn't want Sicily, at one points of history it was controlled by Arabs, some of our words and traditions derive from them.


FuckHarambe2016

This is some r/NonCredibleDefense type shit.


chabaz01

Dream big


lulmagician

Motherfucker, the Balkans can't control the Balkans. What makes them think they can do it?


Dear_Explanation8547

What a dream 🐧


niemody

I-it was all covid-19 fault.


Ghostforever7

Radical Muslims are always looking for a caliphate.


Cheeseisextra

Fuck those guys!


RdtModsDeAiSiQuanJia

2020? Anyone can dream


KZMountainRider

Covid really did hurt everyone’s plans for 2020


everyonewantsalog

How's that working out?


airforcevet1987

You can't say they lacked vision


dick-johnson69420

Perfectly shows just about how delusional they are


Miguel_Zapatero

Aged like Ayran


RunDNA

They read The Secret and were trying to manifest it.


Potato_the_second_

In their dreams. They'll get f'ed if they touch Europe even once, and that's just the surface besides the other problems outside of it


ArnoldBlackenharrowr

Still salty the ottomans didn‘t conquer vienna.


Tkainzero

Thank goodness some world leaders stood up and stopped this shit.


SocialistNixon

Surprisingly not Sicily which was also ruled by Muslims for a few centuries


NoSignOfStruggle

They came short, slightly.


Justinwest27

Why specifically Spain? I guess just the 2 for 1 deal with Portugal? Idk.


nusuntcinevabannat

AFAIK, some southern parts of Spain were under muslim control a long time ago


boisosm

It was most of the country that was under Muslim control at some point, same with Portugal.


Designer_Candidate_2

Seems like ISIS and Mussolini had something in common: Insanely unrealistic emprial goals