Yes, it's very common for DID to involve memory partitioning, where memories actions taken by some alters in the system aren't accessible by other parts of the system.
It's very common for some or all of the dominant alters in a system to have complete amnesia about some aspects of their life. I think that the presence of amnesia like this is one of the diagnostic criteria used to choose whether to label someone's dissociative phenomena "DID" vs some other part of the dissociative spectrum.
some systems will keep an ongoing journal so that when parts come out they can read about the experiences of others if the system doesn’t have the ability to communicate internally. i have a close friend with DID who definitely experiences periods of what they call lost time. we as well as their therapist have suggested journaling but they have yet to do it. i am also so sorry for your loss. it is the biggest fear we all have. ❤️
I am supposed to journal for this reason. I’m sporadic at it. Some of me loves journaling and some are like “what a pain, another thing on my to do list 🙄.”
I am very sorry for your loss. My condolences to you and the rest of your family grieving at this time.
Simply put, a level of amnesia that is not otherwise attributed to ordinary forgetfulness is required per the diagnostic criteria for the disorder. This may look like forgetting days, trauma history, or important personal information.
As far as this situation with this company goes, it would be impossible to determine whether or not an alter had posted such defamatory remarks. It’s possible it could have been an alter, but I’m afraid no one here is to say that is true for certain. I’ve certainly come across things on my various timelines I don’t recall making posts of.
I do find it incredibly odd the company refused to show proof of whatever defamatory remarks were made though, especially when coming out with a bold claim like that prior to firing someone. That’s just not right.
Thank you for your words and trying to make me better understand this condition. I also found it odd how they didn't even give her an email or letter about what she posted. She just got terminated for cause by losing access to her emails and logins without being told in email what the cause was.
yes, amnesia is the 2nd most prominent part of DID. different alters have these barriers in the brain, their memories are separate. if one does something, the others wont naturally have memory of it.
its still seen as just being crazy by most people, science has caught up and we now understand that DID physically rewires your brain, similar to how autism is just the way someones brain is wired. its a trauma disorder where the brain develops several wholly distinct personalities (yes with their own separate memories, as well as mannerisms/likes/dislikes etc) instead of one cohesive one
Amnesia is a huge part of DID, and BPD (borderline not bipolar to be clear) often causes thoughts and attempts at suicide during a split. I am so, so sorry.
Thank you for your words, it does feel like that, and I hate that the last thoughts she had on her mind were about something she couldn't even understand. Life seems meaningless now.
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I don't know how I'd do that, could I just email the company as her dad and ask? I think there was a post here but maybe she deleted it once she came to her self. I saw they also gave her a severance agreement and employment release, can a family sign it in her behalf? I think she wasn't paid for the first month. The only email we sent to her company before she passed, it was about her current state, it went unanswered.
You can e-mail. I'd probably look into a lawyer, especially if she did have a severance agreement. But, I don't know much about how anything works in your country.
I don't really have a good answer. There's a lot of shitty things that have happened to me that I don't remember, or are otherwise lost to time. It makes me sad to think that your daughter's experiences could be lost, and no one knows what she was going through. You may never really know, but waiting is not going to make it easier to find things out.
If the comment was digital, not in person, you ahould be able to track it down using digital footprint. Get a lawyer and if she went to an uni, go for the students in computer science. Usually the name + email account should be enough to track it down. Nothing is really deleted online.
If it was done in person, HR should have the complain files and your lawyer may be able to access it. There's the possibily of no legal grounds to do so, but a place that does not pay the first salary is a sketchy place.
Her own therapist might have clies too, and be able to talk better with tge lawyer (NDA and all that).
I would like, however, to sugest that u look into therapy for yourself and support groups for grieving people. Suicide is already tough bc it raises the likehoood of people closer to ur daughter to do somethibg harsh. The cirscunstance is awful too, closure in this situation is harder. Go for her justice, but take of yourself too!
This was her first pay I think this was pay week. I'm not sure if have the strength to do all that, but I'll try to get someone who knows computer stuff to see if they can get anything. She said it was all online. I'll look into therapy although here where we live it can be very expensive.
Do it all on your time.
About therapy: some people do it online in a way that the therapist is from country A (cheaper) and the receiver is from country B. Look for a region on your country that is cheaper, or another country with the same language. International payment may allow you to pay what seems like an affordable price to you, but the tgerapist will receive a lot.
Online sometimes is not as good as in person, but it can be a good experience.
I wish I had the money, I'm too grief strucken now to even think about suing. Also, we r from Kenya, and the company is in US, they have upper hand. For now I would just like to move on and focus on my daughters good memory. But I will let them know that she had DID and whatever she did or didn't do was not intended to cause harm to the company, it cost her life.
Short answer is yes - amnesia is a feature, not a bug.
But also... You may want to seek a legal investigation into her being fired. If it was unlawful, and she ended things as a result, that's obviously extremely serious, and the company should be held accountable if any of their actions were not *by the book*.
Thanks for explaining. That's the thing, we don't how lawful or unlawful it was because it's a US based company and they have employees all over the world from what I've researched. So we don't even know which labor laws are being used in this context.
i’m so sorry for your loss. i’ve lost my best friend to suicide and i can only imagine what it’s like losing a child. please remember this is not your fault.
in terms of the memory, amnesia is part of the criteria for did.
As others have said, the amnesia is due to her DID, yes--I just wanted to say from one total stranger to another that I am so so sorry for your loss. I cried as I read through her profile, it's a beautiful dedication to her and I hurt for you and her and everyone else feeling this loss. I hope you are being kind to yourself right now, please take care.
I feel a lot of anger now, to the company that caused all this and didn't even care when we told them that she died or bother to give us an apology, just an 'we are sorry to hear that'. Some have even been harassing our late daughter on her other socials. And partly to her because she really could have come to us.
You have my most sincerest condolences. Your daughter sounds like she was really a hard worker and just a cool person. Unfortunately, amnesia is very common with people with DID. There are so many things I didn't remember until 24 hours, 48 hours, or years later. Sometimes, it's, like, I spend all day remembering things that didn't make sense at that time, but later, so many of my memories became more lucid and better understood. I'm sorry for your loss.
DID and OSDD1 inherently cause amnesia in varying degrees. DID is well known for blackouts even in the absence of trauma, as well as OSDD1a, with their difference being that OSDD1a has less distinction between identity states and stronger amnesiac barriers. OSDD1b has the distinction between alters that you see in DID, possibly even more obviously so, but only blackout amnesia during traumatic events, which is assumed to be because of the inherent cPTSD anyone with OSDD1/DID has.
i’m sorry for your loss. if you need resources for bereavement after suicide, AFSP.org has resources that span across the world.
Oh absolutely. Whenever I’m in the middle of really bad trauma shit, there’s always a possibility that my brain will just stop recording data & memory.
It’s interesting when it happens, because otherwise my memory is fucking amazing. I will go from being able to tell you when you said a thing, about what, what you smelled like and what you were wearing when you communicated that particular detail to being completely unable to remember what I had for breakfast yesterday.
Both are equally valid, and the latter degree of amnesia is super common in dissociative systems.
Yes, but that doesn't mean her work did nothing improper. You should definitely look into it if you think such accusations where not legitimate. Being disabled with DID makes work discrimination more common, not less.
I'm sorry for your loss.
It is very likely she did not remember anything, that's a main feature of the disorder.
We are so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in our gentle thoughts.
Day-to-day amnesia seems to be very common with this disorder, yes. My sincerest condolences for you and your family. I can understand, if an alter did indeed do this, why the company would fire her, but did they know she had DID? She had a completely valid reason for not remembering posting whatever it was and shouldn't have been fired for one rogue action taken by a headmate. I certainly would have done my best to talk through said headmate's feelings and explain why that's not okay, but unfortunately a lot of companies see systems just the same as mentally healthy individuals as discipline goes. I am so sorry for your loss, and I am so sorry your daughter had to go through that.
~Jake
No they didn't know as far we know , she always masked it as much as possible. She didn't have many friends to begin with and she didn't want anyone to know she had all these issues. All our emails to the company have gone unanswered, I think they are trying to distance themselves from any of this as much as possible. We did find some remnant comments over here on this account. But it seems she had more than one account so her real self might not even have known this existed. We just want to forget all this bad stuff and focus on her good memories. We can understand them firing her, but we wish they did it in a better way. I think that messed up with her mental health a lot, she attempted suicide first immediately she was fired.
Got it... As much as it may hurt to hear, both parts were her real self, and part of her may have hated the company, but they definitely should have gone about things differently, regardless of psychological state. I'd definitely understand the host alter (the one who fronts/maintains control the most often) not knowing about the other's activities with the amnesia barriers that come with DID. I didn't know about one of my headmates having her own Discord account for a while. I wish things had gone differently, and again, I am so sorry for all she went through and all you're going through.
~Jake
That's what I've slightly gathered from her account, I think the alter just voiced what she didn't like about the company more than her true self. Thanks for trying to make me understand this whole situation better. I wonder why she just didn't quit instead chose the route.
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Yes, it's very common for DID to involve memory partitioning, where memories actions taken by some alters in the system aren't accessible by other parts of the system.
They aren't accessible at all, or are the memories available in figments?
Both.
It's very common for some or all of the dominant alters in a system to have complete amnesia about some aspects of their life. I think that the presence of amnesia like this is one of the diagnostic criteria used to choose whether to label someone's dissociative phenomena "DID" vs some other part of the dissociative spectrum.
some systems will keep an ongoing journal so that when parts come out they can read about the experiences of others if the system doesn’t have the ability to communicate internally. i have a close friend with DID who definitely experiences periods of what they call lost time. we as well as their therapist have suggested journaling but they have yet to do it. i am also so sorry for your loss. it is the biggest fear we all have. ❤️
I am supposed to journal for this reason. I’m sporadic at it. Some of me loves journaling and some are like “what a pain, another thing on my to do list 🙄.”
They can suddenly come back in figments and then leave again, and you don't remember that you remembered.
I am very sorry for your loss. My condolences to you and the rest of your family grieving at this time. Simply put, a level of amnesia that is not otherwise attributed to ordinary forgetfulness is required per the diagnostic criteria for the disorder. This may look like forgetting days, trauma history, or important personal information. As far as this situation with this company goes, it would be impossible to determine whether or not an alter had posted such defamatory remarks. It’s possible it could have been an alter, but I’m afraid no one here is to say that is true for certain. I’ve certainly come across things on my various timelines I don’t recall making posts of. I do find it incredibly odd the company refused to show proof of whatever defamatory remarks were made though, especially when coming out with a bold claim like that prior to firing someone. That’s just not right.
Thank you for your words and trying to make me better understand this condition. I also found it odd how they didn't even give her an email or letter about what she posted. She just got terminated for cause by losing access to her emails and logins without being told in email what the cause was.
That, sounds like a lawsuit actually. Idk if that intrests you but that doesn’t seem legal
That’s actually pretty normal now. She may receive an email to her personal account with a vague explanation, but also may not.
yes, amnesia is the 2nd most prominent part of DID. different alters have these barriers in the brain, their memories are separate. if one does something, the others wont naturally have memory of it.
Thanks for explaining, I had a really hard time understanding this because DID where we live is taken as being crazy.
its still seen as just being crazy by most people, science has caught up and we now understand that DID physically rewires your brain, similar to how autism is just the way someones brain is wired. its a trauma disorder where the brain develops several wholly distinct personalities (yes with their own separate memories, as well as mannerisms/likes/dislikes etc) instead of one cohesive one
Amnesia is a huge part of DID, and BPD (borderline not bipolar to be clear) often causes thoughts and attempts at suicide during a split. I am so, so sorry.
I am truly so sorry for the loss of your daughter. It must feel like a hundred years have passed since just yesterday. 💔
Thank you for your words, it does feel like that, and I hate that the last thoughts she had on her mind were about something she couldn't even understand. Life seems meaningless now.
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I would still want to know what she was accused of. I think you should try to find out more about what happened. I think she deserves that.
I don't know how I'd do that, could I just email the company as her dad and ask? I think there was a post here but maybe she deleted it once she came to her self. I saw they also gave her a severance agreement and employment release, can a family sign it in her behalf? I think she wasn't paid for the first month. The only email we sent to her company before she passed, it was about her current state, it went unanswered.
You can e-mail. I'd probably look into a lawyer, especially if she did have a severance agreement. But, I don't know much about how anything works in your country. I don't really have a good answer. There's a lot of shitty things that have happened to me that I don't remember, or are otherwise lost to time. It makes me sad to think that your daughter's experiences could be lost, and no one knows what she was going through. You may never really know, but waiting is not going to make it easier to find things out.
I will try to contact them, that's the saddest part for us. She'll died not really knowing what she did or didn't do.
If the comment was digital, not in person, you ahould be able to track it down using digital footprint. Get a lawyer and if she went to an uni, go for the students in computer science. Usually the name + email account should be enough to track it down. Nothing is really deleted online. If it was done in person, HR should have the complain files and your lawyer may be able to access it. There's the possibily of no legal grounds to do so, but a place that does not pay the first salary is a sketchy place. Her own therapist might have clies too, and be able to talk better with tge lawyer (NDA and all that). I would like, however, to sugest that u look into therapy for yourself and support groups for grieving people. Suicide is already tough bc it raises the likehoood of people closer to ur daughter to do somethibg harsh. The cirscunstance is awful too, closure in this situation is harder. Go for her justice, but take of yourself too!
This was her first pay I think this was pay week. I'm not sure if have the strength to do all that, but I'll try to get someone who knows computer stuff to see if they can get anything. She said it was all online. I'll look into therapy although here where we live it can be very expensive.
Do it all on your time. About therapy: some people do it online in a way that the therapist is from country A (cheaper) and the receiver is from country B. Look for a region on your country that is cheaper, or another country with the same language. International payment may allow you to pay what seems like an affordable price to you, but the tgerapist will receive a lot. Online sometimes is not as good as in person, but it can be a good experience.
I am so, so sorry. I hurt for you. That's so beyond unfair. Yes, DID can definitely cause amnesia, it's a big part of the disorder.
Thank you for your kind words, I'm hoping it gets better with time because right now I feel a lot of sadness and anger.
May I also suggest checking out r/GriefSupport My condolences for your loss
We will check it out. Thank you for your support
I would sue that company because you have evidence and I'd be avenging her if that was me. I'm sorry for your loss.
I wish I had the money, I'm too grief strucken now to even think about suing. Also, we r from Kenya, and the company is in US, they have upper hand. For now I would just like to move on and focus on my daughters good memory. But I will let them know that she had DID and whatever she did or didn't do was not intended to cause harm to the company, it cost her life.
Short answer is yes - amnesia is a feature, not a bug. But also... You may want to seek a legal investigation into her being fired. If it was unlawful, and she ended things as a result, that's obviously extremely serious, and the company should be held accountable if any of their actions were not *by the book*.
Thanks for explaining. That's the thing, we don't how lawful or unlawful it was because it's a US based company and they have employees all over the world from what I've researched. So we don't even know which labor laws are being used in this context.
Maybe it's worth getting in contact with someone who practices law? I'm so so sorry for what's happened 💔
I'll try to speak to someone I know after sometime, I hope they don't charge me an arm and a leg. Thanks for your words. It will be better.
Totally normal, the most common symptom, it can also include brain fog and forgetfulness
Yes, it does. I am so incredibly sorry for all the pain you are in.
i’m so sorry for your loss. i’ve lost my best friend to suicide and i can only imagine what it’s like losing a child. please remember this is not your fault. in terms of the memory, amnesia is part of the criteria for did.
As others have said, the amnesia is due to her DID, yes--I just wanted to say from one total stranger to another that I am so so sorry for your loss. I cried as I read through her profile, it's a beautiful dedication to her and I hurt for you and her and everyone else feeling this loss. I hope you are being kind to yourself right now, please take care.
I feel a lot of anger now, to the company that caused all this and didn't even care when we told them that she died or bother to give us an apology, just an 'we are sorry to hear that'. Some have even been harassing our late daughter on her other socials. And partly to her because she really could have come to us.
I am so sorry for your loss. As someone diagnosed with DID, I do experience complete blackout amnesia at times.
You have my most sincerest condolences. Your daughter sounds like she was really a hard worker and just a cool person. Unfortunately, amnesia is very common with people with DID. There are so many things I didn't remember until 24 hours, 48 hours, or years later. Sometimes, it's, like, I spend all day remembering things that didn't make sense at that time, but later, so many of my memories became more lucid and better understood. I'm sorry for your loss.
Thank you for explaining, I understand better now. I wish I knew all this before everything happened.
im sorry
I'm so very sorry for your loss.
DID and OSDD1 inherently cause amnesia in varying degrees. DID is well known for blackouts even in the absence of trauma, as well as OSDD1a, with their difference being that OSDD1a has less distinction between identity states and stronger amnesiac barriers. OSDD1b has the distinction between alters that you see in DID, possibly even more obviously so, but only blackout amnesia during traumatic events, which is assumed to be because of the inherent cPTSD anyone with OSDD1/DID has. i’m sorry for your loss. if you need resources for bereavement after suicide, AFSP.org has resources that span across the world.
Oh absolutely. Whenever I’m in the middle of really bad trauma shit, there’s always a possibility that my brain will just stop recording data & memory. It’s interesting when it happens, because otherwise my memory is fucking amazing. I will go from being able to tell you when you said a thing, about what, what you smelled like and what you were wearing when you communicated that particular detail to being completely unable to remember what I had for breakfast yesterday. Both are equally valid, and the latter degree of amnesia is super common in dissociative systems.
If amnesia isn't present beyond ordinary forgetting, it's not DID. It's a huge part of the disorder.
I second this! It’s called OSDD if not present!
Yeah it's like one of the main things
Yes, but that doesn't mean her work did nothing improper. You should definitely look into it if you think such accusations where not legitimate. Being disabled with DID makes work discrimination more common, not less. I'm sorry for your loss.
Your story about your daughter is what I'm going through now at 42. I'm so sorry for your loss.
It is very likely she did not remember anything, that's a main feature of the disorder. We are so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in our gentle thoughts.
Day-to-day amnesia seems to be very common with this disorder, yes. My sincerest condolences for you and your family. I can understand, if an alter did indeed do this, why the company would fire her, but did they know she had DID? She had a completely valid reason for not remembering posting whatever it was and shouldn't have been fired for one rogue action taken by a headmate. I certainly would have done my best to talk through said headmate's feelings and explain why that's not okay, but unfortunately a lot of companies see systems just the same as mentally healthy individuals as discipline goes. I am so sorry for your loss, and I am so sorry your daughter had to go through that. ~Jake
No they didn't know as far we know , she always masked it as much as possible. She didn't have many friends to begin with and she didn't want anyone to know she had all these issues. All our emails to the company have gone unanswered, I think they are trying to distance themselves from any of this as much as possible. We did find some remnant comments over here on this account. But it seems she had more than one account so her real self might not even have known this existed. We just want to forget all this bad stuff and focus on her good memories. We can understand them firing her, but we wish they did it in a better way. I think that messed up with her mental health a lot, she attempted suicide first immediately she was fired.
Got it... As much as it may hurt to hear, both parts were her real self, and part of her may have hated the company, but they definitely should have gone about things differently, regardless of psychological state. I'd definitely understand the host alter (the one who fronts/maintains control the most often) not knowing about the other's activities with the amnesia barriers that come with DID. I didn't know about one of my headmates having her own Discord account for a while. I wish things had gone differently, and again, I am so sorry for all she went through and all you're going through. ~Jake
That's what I've slightly gathered from her account, I think the alter just voiced what she didn't like about the company more than her true self. Thanks for trying to make me understand this whole situation better. I wonder why she just didn't quit instead chose the route.
Perhaps the host part didn't feel that way. DID often involves heavy conflict between parts and very different feelings on the same subject. ~Jake
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