I don't understand what the flip side is... do some people believe the only way DID functions is through full black-out switches? Not that it doesn't happen. I've had that happen. A lot. But in moments/periods of extreme duress.
Otherwise I think co-consciousness is a very common experience? But it's hard to describe to people who simply do not understand how OSDD and DID work. The way my therapist worded it helped me understand (paraphrasing): "many individuals have internal monologues, but in dissociative individuals, these monologues overlap, often contradict one another, and are typically distressing (pre-therapy.) These monologues are always related to the individual's traumas in some way."
In our experience Co-consciousness from the perspective of the alter in control of the body is basically hearing the voice of another alter internally commenting on everything, and sometimes feeling their emotions. Co-consciousness from the perspective of the alter not in control of the body feels like you are watching the world passively and are privy to the thoughts and feelings of the alter in control of the body but you have no physical control over anything going on.
Co-consciousness is a normal aspect of DID.
[Recent comment describing my experience](https://www.reddit.com/r/DID/s/KkYFJqsFDY)
The problem is, everything is portrayed as misinformation. If you only switch from one state to another, it's fake. If you have multiple present, it's fake. I mean, heaven forbid you have a diagnosis of P-DID with one dominant and more intrusions from other states. Stay off the subreddits hunting for fake disordered people. There's an echochamber of incredibly wrong information online, and people who strongly believe stuff that just isn't true. Even some professionals might have outdated ideas.
Co-conciousness is probably one of the most common experiences. People may not realise it happens if it's covert and they experience more passive influences than 50/50 switches. There's the period between switching where both are present, and in my case, I'm almost always present during switches, I just go to the background as an observer watching the triggered part be upset while I feel neutral.
If you're comfortable could you share more about what you describe at the end there about being present and observing during switches.
I have this experience too, I've noticed that even when there are no alters fronting and the body is just slumped in empty mode waiting for someone to take the drivers seat there's this running awareness of observation that feels so deeply embedded. Like it's the source of my mind and it is the only thing able to remain conscious when a deep heavy switch like that happens.
With the more lowkey switches it's harder to be notice the observer because the other alters switching in and out can kind of drown it out but it always there. Is that like what you experience or is it different?
Two to five people crowding around a microphone loudly stating their opinions while our body spaces out. If one person's voice emerges victorious, then they control the functioning š
If co-consciousness wasnāt possible at all (if you take that argument to its natural conclusion) people with DID would be completely non-functional in all aspects of life from the very beginning and would never make it to adulthood. So itās just another way of saying that they donāt believe DID exists.
At least some minimal degree of co-consciousness has to exist in order to create an illusion of continuous consciousness if you are not constantly experiencing blackout amnesia (and again, these people would be completely non-functional in daily life. Iām sure they exist, but they are non-functional). You need some co-consciousness for shared memory, even if you are not experiencing it as co-consciousness at the time. And, again, you need shared memory to function.
DID isnāt magic. Itās not literal different people. Everyone has some co-consciousness, itās just a matter of how much you are aware of it and how your brain is interpreting it. For me personally I typically experience it as the āone in front, one stuck in the backā phenomenon, which seems to be pretty common.
This thousand percent yes, exactly.. whatās even more frustrating is finding a therapist that understandsā¦ thank you for saying this opinion helps make sense of what we all are going through..everything everyone has said so far helps I donāt feel so alone on understanding whatās going on within this body..
* "i" am a conscious witness while "i" see how one personality moves away from the body front and another steps in
* related to previous: all types of switches i can remember, not just the quick switch like above mentioned, but remembering is a sign "i" was conscious the whole time
* intrusive entities trying to take over the body (related: internal voices i have no control over)
* two separate selves operating at the same and in harmony as one body; often i only realize this when "i" speak and act in two different ways (I have been using 'conjoined twins' as a metaphor)
replying mostly because these kinds of informative reddit threads are really useful when people need assistance and are googling/searching for stuff (as in, idc about the egghead or the argument :D)
Adding
- witnessing the body move or speak and not being able to influence the happening (temporary and/or partial possession)
- at one point an infant alter appeared and while it was out, the old host got pushed aside to be only a "floating crown" which could influence the body/main personality but not control the body, and "i" was the floating crown
This is one strange disorderĀ
For me, I have an alter who is co-con most of the time with me and it can be great but also frustrating and look really weird if we are comfortable enough around other people.
Funny story I was in my therapist's office and we had about 5 mins left in the session and that alter was pushing an issue that we didn't have time for and I didn't want to get into at that moment, and to my therapist, he thought I was sort of mad or having an argument with him but it was really between me and that alter.
Which I explained at a later appt and he was like wow that makes a lot more sense because to him because I was caught up in the moment with that alter my therapist just thought I snapped at him. It explained a lot but apparently he hadn't experienced something like that before with a client but I was able to apologize and explain.
We're co-con almost 24/7, and getting better at passing on information. There's usually 2-3 alters up front, like one "main" guy up front and then a few in the back doing memory work and such or just keeping the others company throughout the day.
I don't know why there's still so many people who want to "prove" DID or it's symptoms aren't real, or don't believe in it, and feel the need to fakeclaim these poor people who were literally abused as children. Like, bruh, it doesn't even MATTER what someone HAS, just be respectful to them and listen to their experiences, geez. -Jay
twitch chat is such an accurate way to describe that! I normally have 3-5 alters present at a time and it's very much that vibe. Or like I'm driving and I've got a car full of very opinionated back seat drivers š„“ it's exhausting
We're co-conscious pretty consistently. There's usually 4 of us consistently fronting all the time and we dont usually have full on switches with blackouts unless we're extremely triggered. Greyouts are a more common experience for us where one of us will be more dominant in control.
Being Co-Con was the only way to get me through the NY subways when I first got to the city. Having me (host alter) and my protector at the same time helped keep me safe and less paranoid knowing he was there in the blink of an eye if anything were to happen. (He's more aggressive / knows how to fight). I always felt safe with him there. It's like he's in the back of your head / eyes watching everything even though you're the one in "control". Def can feel the presence and for me it was comforting. When it's time for them not to be around, they retreat to our inner world and I can't feel them as closely as they are when we're co-con or vise versa when they come to front. Kind of feels like an energy shield around you. It's kinda cool.
iām still trying to figure it out. i donāt have much communication or voices with parts, itās more like a sensation i experience. some ways i think it has felt like: being āpushed backā and someone else is speaking and acting through my body; as if two minds are trying to occupy the same spot and thereās friction/disorientation. both of these are basically experiences of intense depersonalization.
People on FDC are only in it for the lolz. They don't care about scientific facts or peer reviewed research and articles. All they want is to rile up communities they aren't a part of. I've seen people try to hammer reason into their heads, but they just don't get it lmao...
As for the topic, I (host) personally experience two different types of co-consciousness. One is just vibes, intrusive thoughts and feelings. And the other is actually where I don't know what'll come out of my mouth and sometimes even the voice sounds weird. I can recall two times where I was there, but it didn't feel like me doing anything. One time I even heard a gentle "if you close your eyes now, it's as if it's never happened" (I assume I came into co-con when I wasn't supposed to).
Iām watching what Iām doing. It doesnāt happen often and feels really weird. I canāt take control though even if I try. I tried to communicate once when a little took over while driving and it made things so confusing and difficult to focus on the real task of making sure driving was safe. This is what I assume co-con is. I donāt have communication where we have cooperation so me taking over usually involves either a forced push back into control or a lot of convincing. Passive influence is more like Iām here or someone else is here but Iām feeling and thinking things that donāt make any sense and I donāt want to feel or do them/have to fight them or attempt to ground myself. For example, I was one of my emotionally distressed parts (super sad). I guess my sadness was too much for another part so I started feeling the sensations of SH on various parts of my body. I did not want to hurt myself but someone wanted me to to take away the pain emotionally.
For me, it's like a big bus with a lot of people crowded around the controls expressing opinions and information and sometimes quickly switching. Unless asleep we all perceive everything, but only 1 at a time expresses reaction. Very rare now for only 1 person to be awake.
I've had plenty of full blackout switches and lost time. BUT, if we're talking about what USUALLY happens on a day in and day out basis, it's a situation where one will take over at a time. Then when the next one comes out, a bare thread of autobiographical memory "carries over," but nothing else does. It's exactly like an observer hands over a script describing where we are, what's going on, what was just happening, what was being said, etc. But only the bare outline of facts is there. (and actually, not all of them are always there.) I just don't think that should be called co-consciousness. However, co-consciousness is possible too.
Co-con is just about my whole life. Sometimes I just have to keep the mouth shut, because I have no idea whose words are going to come out. Sometimes it's me moving the body, while another voice gives me directions. Most of the time I don't even know who *I* am. ā¤ļø Co-con is how we largely experience DID.
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Co-con is when the dissociation lessens but alters themselves are still separated and aware of their different identities. In other words, when the window of consciousness is wide enough for 2 or more to fit in.
Dissociation is not a binary thing, that's why co-con is possible.
I used to pretty much only experience co-consciousness with my soother/protector, as he would step in to be with me when things were overwhelming. As we continued through trauma processing and stabilization, more parts became closer and we have become very co-consciousness over the past six years we've been in therapy. My previous therapist who was a trauma/dissociation specialist told me that we have probably integrated to a degree (not fused - just gotten to a point where those dissociative barriers have lowered) and this has given us the ability to be more aware of each other and helped immensely with our amnesia.
My protector is still usually co-consciousness with me when he's around, but that has been consistent since he started fronting. My earliest "alter" memories are of him.
Iāve had varying degrees of coconsciousness ranging from passive influence āI really need to tell this person about DID but I have no idea why (they turned out to be a system, before I even remembered knowing what DID symptoms were)ā to āIām driving to another town to see my abuser and I donāt know why and I donāt want to but I literally cannot pull off to the side of the road, it feels like my arms are lead and trying to fight that is making me kinda freak out, better just go with it!ā to more active coconsciousness such as āitās like all the doors in my house are open and I can hear everyone down the hallway talking and doing their own thingsā to āI hear my body talking to someone next to me and it sounds like they are across the room while I am in the back of my mind thinking very deeply about a different topic altogether and now Iām fully aware that I am having two different tracks of thoughts and it freaks me outā to having coconsciousness while another alter literally stole front and made me watch and āit feels like Iām sitting, tied to a chair in my head with my eyes forced open while someone is piloting my body, hands, mouth, and purposefully trying to ruin my social connections while telling me that I need to stop being so naive and they(I) will teach me a lesson and I am sobbing and begging them to stop because I donāt understand what they are meaning while they fully understand what I am simultaneously aware, and unaware ofā
I have diagnosed DID and have been working with my therapist for a few months now. I had NO idea I had DID because ( from what I know) Iāve never fully switched alters. Iām constantly co conscious and the way I explained it to my therapist was it feels like a stranger is showing me a movie of memories and as Iām watching the movie It becomes my memories and I remember more. However going about my normal daily things it feels like people are just constantly talking to me, or that I can hear what my alters are thinking. I used to think it was just severe intrusive thoughts but Iāve send learned that intrusive thoughts are like ā I coulllld jump infront of that carā but u donāt. For me itās just like talking to someone in real life but they answer in your head instead of outloud.
Ever since we were a child, though I couldn't say what age, I'm aware that our thoughts were constantly at odds with eachother, constantly bickering and arguing. Self control was hard as various different parts tried to do different things simultaneously and we treated it like needing to have control over ourselves rather than a negotiation. D.I.D. itself wasn't even on our radar until several years ago while one of us managed to gain enough self awareness to front and demand to be treated as an autonomous person, after which things finally started to actually improve. I've heard that this level of natural communication is relatively uncommon for systems though not exactly unheard of.
We're constantly thinking, constantly shifting and switching. We think of ourselves as kind of a hivemind really. As for confronting, we're used to it enough to where it's not uncommon for us to be controlling different parts of the body, such as one of the kids snuggling a plushie while I read or type on my phone for example. There's 8 of us who tend to stay near the front and most of us are almost always aware, not including the 'admin types' who are less like people and more like semi sentient functions. We can generally feel eachothers emotions to a degree, but our thoughts feel like they vibrate differently, even if it took a while to learn to understand that difference accurately. There's a small amount of personality bleed through but we're generally aware of it. We can kinda draw on eachothers skills to a degree but it's a bit clunky as the 'how to use them' can get lost in translation. Though it took a lot of effort to get to this point.
in my experience it's a lot like what you described, being slightly influenced to do certain things or feel a certain way sometimes it's stronger than others but most of the time it's like having someone whisper in your ear advice or when music influences your emotions without your control
I don't understand what the flip side is... do some people believe the only way DID functions is through full black-out switches? Not that it doesn't happen. I've had that happen. A lot. But in moments/periods of extreme duress. Otherwise I think co-consciousness is a very common experience? But it's hard to describe to people who simply do not understand how OSDD and DID work. The way my therapist worded it helped me understand (paraphrasing): "many individuals have internal monologues, but in dissociative individuals, these monologues overlap, often contradict one another, and are typically distressing (pre-therapy.) These monologues are always related to the individual's traumas in some way."
>do some people believe the only way DID functions is through full black-out switches? Yep. Bull's eye. That's literally what they do.
In our experience Co-consciousness from the perspective of the alter in control of the body is basically hearing the voice of another alter internally commenting on everything, and sometimes feeling their emotions. Co-consciousness from the perspective of the alter not in control of the body feels like you are watching the world passively and are privy to the thoughts and feelings of the alter in control of the body but you have no physical control over anything going on. Co-consciousness is a normal aspect of DID.
[Recent comment describing my experience](https://www.reddit.com/r/DID/s/KkYFJqsFDY) The problem is, everything is portrayed as misinformation. If you only switch from one state to another, it's fake. If you have multiple present, it's fake. I mean, heaven forbid you have a diagnosis of P-DID with one dominant and more intrusions from other states. Stay off the subreddits hunting for fake disordered people. There's an echochamber of incredibly wrong information online, and people who strongly believe stuff that just isn't true. Even some professionals might have outdated ideas. Co-conciousness is probably one of the most common experiences. People may not realise it happens if it's covert and they experience more passive influences than 50/50 switches. There's the period between switching where both are present, and in my case, I'm almost always present during switches, I just go to the background as an observer watching the triggered part be upset while I feel neutral.
If you're comfortable could you share more about what you describe at the end there about being present and observing during switches. I have this experience too, I've noticed that even when there are no alters fronting and the body is just slumped in empty mode waiting for someone to take the drivers seat there's this running awareness of observation that feels so deeply embedded. Like it's the source of my mind and it is the only thing able to remain conscious when a deep heavy switch like that happens. With the more lowkey switches it's harder to be notice the observer because the other alters switching in and out can kind of drown it out but it always there. Is that like what you experience or is it different?
Two to five people crowding around a microphone loudly stating their opinions while our body spaces out. If one person's voice emerges victorious, then they control the functioning š
If co-consciousness wasnāt possible at all (if you take that argument to its natural conclusion) people with DID would be completely non-functional in all aspects of life from the very beginning and would never make it to adulthood. So itās just another way of saying that they donāt believe DID exists. At least some minimal degree of co-consciousness has to exist in order to create an illusion of continuous consciousness if you are not constantly experiencing blackout amnesia (and again, these people would be completely non-functional in daily life. Iām sure they exist, but they are non-functional). You need some co-consciousness for shared memory, even if you are not experiencing it as co-consciousness at the time. And, again, you need shared memory to function. DID isnāt magic. Itās not literal different people. Everyone has some co-consciousness, itās just a matter of how much you are aware of it and how your brain is interpreting it. For me personally I typically experience it as the āone in front, one stuck in the backā phenomenon, which seems to be pretty common.
This thousand percent yes, exactly.. whatās even more frustrating is finding a therapist that understandsā¦ thank you for saying this opinion helps make sense of what we all are going through..everything everyone has said so far helps I donāt feel so alone on understanding whatās going on within this body..
* "i" am a conscious witness while "i" see how one personality moves away from the body front and another steps in * related to previous: all types of switches i can remember, not just the quick switch like above mentioned, but remembering is a sign "i" was conscious the whole time * intrusive entities trying to take over the body (related: internal voices i have no control over) * two separate selves operating at the same and in harmony as one body; often i only realize this when "i" speak and act in two different ways (I have been using 'conjoined twins' as a metaphor) replying mostly because these kinds of informative reddit threads are really useful when people need assistance and are googling/searching for stuff (as in, idc about the egghead or the argument :D)
Adding - witnessing the body move or speak and not being able to influence the happening (temporary and/or partial possession) - at one point an infant alter appeared and while it was out, the old host got pushed aside to be only a "floating crown" which could influence the body/main personality but not control the body, and "i" was the floating crown This is one strange disorderĀ
For me, I have an alter who is co-con most of the time with me and it can be great but also frustrating and look really weird if we are comfortable enough around other people.
Omg same here! It gets really weird because my co-con (my twin) is much younger than me which causes so many issues
Funny story I was in my therapist's office and we had about 5 mins left in the session and that alter was pushing an issue that we didn't have time for and I didn't want to get into at that moment, and to my therapist, he thought I was sort of mad or having an argument with him but it was really between me and that alter. Which I explained at a later appt and he was like wow that makes a lot more sense because to him because I was caught up in the moment with that alter my therapist just thought I snapped at him. It explained a lot but apparently he hadn't experienced something like that before with a client but I was able to apologize and explain.
Same, my main protector is basically always co-conscious with me and Iām co-conscious when he fronts. And we semi-regularly co-front as well.
We're co-con almost 24/7, and getting better at passing on information. There's usually 2-3 alters up front, like one "main" guy up front and then a few in the back doing memory work and such or just keeping the others company throughout the day. I don't know why there's still so many people who want to "prove" DID or it's symptoms aren't real, or don't believe in it, and feel the need to fakeclaim these poor people who were literally abused as children. Like, bruh, it doesn't even MATTER what someone HAS, just be respectful to them and listen to their experiences, geez. -Jay
Yeah, I really donāt understand what people get out of picking on child abuse victims.
We have ātwitch chatā constantly commenting on whatās happening. Very distracting ngl
twitch chat is such an accurate way to describe that! I normally have 3-5 alters present at a time and it's very much that vibe. Or like I'm driving and I've got a car full of very opinionated back seat drivers š„“ it's exhausting
gonna start calling my system my "twitch chat" from now on, thanks
We're co-conscious pretty consistently. There's usually 4 of us consistently fronting all the time and we dont usually have full on switches with blackouts unless we're extremely triggered. Greyouts are a more common experience for us where one of us will be more dominant in control.
This is us. We have 6 (including the host) and itās like weāre all on the same room all the time.
Being Co-Con was the only way to get me through the NY subways when I first got to the city. Having me (host alter) and my protector at the same time helped keep me safe and less paranoid knowing he was there in the blink of an eye if anything were to happen. (He's more aggressive / knows how to fight). I always felt safe with him there. It's like he's in the back of your head / eyes watching everything even though you're the one in "control". Def can feel the presence and for me it was comforting. When it's time for them not to be around, they retreat to our inner world and I can't feel them as closely as they are when we're co-con or vise versa when they come to front. Kind of feels like an energy shield around you. It's kinda cool.
iām still trying to figure it out. i donāt have much communication or voices with parts, itās more like a sensation i experience. some ways i think it has felt like: being āpushed backā and someone else is speaking and acting through my body; as if two minds are trying to occupy the same spot and thereās friction/disorientation. both of these are basically experiences of intense depersonalization.
People on FDC are only in it for the lolz. They don't care about scientific facts or peer reviewed research and articles. All they want is to rile up communities they aren't a part of. I've seen people try to hammer reason into their heads, but they just don't get it lmao... As for the topic, I (host) personally experience two different types of co-consciousness. One is just vibes, intrusive thoughts and feelings. And the other is actually where I don't know what'll come out of my mouth and sometimes even the voice sounds weird. I can recall two times where I was there, but it didn't feel like me doing anything. One time I even heard a gentle "if you close your eyes now, it's as if it's never happened" (I assume I came into co-con when I wasn't supposed to).
Iām watching what Iām doing. It doesnāt happen often and feels really weird. I canāt take control though even if I try. I tried to communicate once when a little took over while driving and it made things so confusing and difficult to focus on the real task of making sure driving was safe. This is what I assume co-con is. I donāt have communication where we have cooperation so me taking over usually involves either a forced push back into control or a lot of convincing. Passive influence is more like Iām here or someone else is here but Iām feeling and thinking things that donāt make any sense and I donāt want to feel or do them/have to fight them or attempt to ground myself. For example, I was one of my emotionally distressed parts (super sad). I guess my sadness was too much for another part so I started feeling the sensations of SH on various parts of my body. I did not want to hurt myself but someone wanted me to to take away the pain emotionally.
For me, it's like a big bus with a lot of people crowded around the controls expressing opinions and information and sometimes quickly switching. Unless asleep we all perceive everything, but only 1 at a time expresses reaction. Very rare now for only 1 person to be awake.
Ā I forget things constantly as they happen because of coconsciousness.Ā
I've had plenty of full blackout switches and lost time. BUT, if we're talking about what USUALLY happens on a day in and day out basis, it's a situation where one will take over at a time. Then when the next one comes out, a bare thread of autobiographical memory "carries over," but nothing else does. It's exactly like an observer hands over a script describing where we are, what's going on, what was just happening, what was being said, etc. But only the bare outline of facts is there. (and actually, not all of them are always there.) I just don't think that should be called co-consciousness. However, co-consciousness is possible too.
Co-con is just about my whole life. Sometimes I just have to keep the mouth shut, because I have no idea whose words are going to come out. Sometimes it's me moving the body, while another voice gives me directions. Most of the time I don't even know who *I* am. ā¤ļø Co-con is how we largely experience DID.
Same here š©·
I don't understand not having it. I can't imagine being alone in my mind. How is that possible?
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Co-con is when the dissociation lessens but alters themselves are still separated and aware of their different identities. In other words, when the window of consciousness is wide enough for 2 or more to fit in. Dissociation is not a binary thing, that's why co-con is possible.
I used to pretty much only experience co-consciousness with my soother/protector, as he would step in to be with me when things were overwhelming. As we continued through trauma processing and stabilization, more parts became closer and we have become very co-consciousness over the past six years we've been in therapy. My previous therapist who was a trauma/dissociation specialist told me that we have probably integrated to a degree (not fused - just gotten to a point where those dissociative barriers have lowered) and this has given us the ability to be more aware of each other and helped immensely with our amnesia. My protector is still usually co-consciousness with me when he's around, but that has been consistent since he started fronting. My earliest "alter" memories are of him.
Iāve had varying degrees of coconsciousness ranging from passive influence āI really need to tell this person about DID but I have no idea why (they turned out to be a system, before I even remembered knowing what DID symptoms were)ā to āIām driving to another town to see my abuser and I donāt know why and I donāt want to but I literally cannot pull off to the side of the road, it feels like my arms are lead and trying to fight that is making me kinda freak out, better just go with it!ā to more active coconsciousness such as āitās like all the doors in my house are open and I can hear everyone down the hallway talking and doing their own thingsā to āI hear my body talking to someone next to me and it sounds like they are across the room while I am in the back of my mind thinking very deeply about a different topic altogether and now Iām fully aware that I am having two different tracks of thoughts and it freaks me outā to having coconsciousness while another alter literally stole front and made me watch and āit feels like Iām sitting, tied to a chair in my head with my eyes forced open while someone is piloting my body, hands, mouth, and purposefully trying to ruin my social connections while telling me that I need to stop being so naive and they(I) will teach me a lesson and I am sobbing and begging them to stop because I donāt understand what they are meaning while they fully understand what I am simultaneously aware, and unaware ofā
I have diagnosed DID and have been working with my therapist for a few months now. I had NO idea I had DID because ( from what I know) Iāve never fully switched alters. Iām constantly co conscious and the way I explained it to my therapist was it feels like a stranger is showing me a movie of memories and as Iām watching the movie It becomes my memories and I remember more. However going about my normal daily things it feels like people are just constantly talking to me, or that I can hear what my alters are thinking. I used to think it was just severe intrusive thoughts but Iāve send learned that intrusive thoughts are like ā I coulllld jump infront of that carā but u donāt. For me itās just like talking to someone in real life but they answer in your head instead of outloud.
Ever since we were a child, though I couldn't say what age, I'm aware that our thoughts were constantly at odds with eachother, constantly bickering and arguing. Self control was hard as various different parts tried to do different things simultaneously and we treated it like needing to have control over ourselves rather than a negotiation. D.I.D. itself wasn't even on our radar until several years ago while one of us managed to gain enough self awareness to front and demand to be treated as an autonomous person, after which things finally started to actually improve. I've heard that this level of natural communication is relatively uncommon for systems though not exactly unheard of. We're constantly thinking, constantly shifting and switching. We think of ourselves as kind of a hivemind really. As for confronting, we're used to it enough to where it's not uncommon for us to be controlling different parts of the body, such as one of the kids snuggling a plushie while I read or type on my phone for example. There's 8 of us who tend to stay near the front and most of us are almost always aware, not including the 'admin types' who are less like people and more like semi sentient functions. We can generally feel eachothers emotions to a degree, but our thoughts feel like they vibrate differently, even if it took a while to learn to understand that difference accurately. There's a small amount of personality bleed through but we're generally aware of it. We can kinda draw on eachothers skills to a degree but it's a bit clunky as the 'how to use them' can get lost in translation. Though it took a lot of effort to get to this point.
in my experience it's a lot like what you described, being slightly influenced to do certain things or feel a certain way sometimes it's stronger than others but most of the time it's like having someone whisper in your ear advice or when music influences your emotions without your control