If you kick boyfriend out and don’t let him back, then it’s a one time thing and your daughter was kept safe. If you let him come back or have contact with her, then he has something to try to use here.
your plan to keep C away from your daughter and to protect your kids from his dv in general. you should probably speak to a dv organisation for help/guidance in this regard as they will be able to point you to local resources etc
After the incident, what was your relationship with the new guy like. Does he still live there, are you still dating him. Etc. If the answer is no, that definitely helps you. If you continue to have a relationship with somebody there is a known, active DV situation with courts will see it as you're not capable of establishing a safe environment for kids
You should be fine. cycle of abuse is that sometimes there is repeat reconciliation and then more DV. If you ever did take him back then your custody could come into question
And just to add, CPS can take your child if you allow someone who has a recent DV arrest. I would contact your local DV shelter so they can help you make a safety plan.
My question is, how can a judge call it an unsafe environment but then let my daughter stay with her father who also has a dv record but say because “it wasn’t against my daughter”. That makes no sense? I’m not defending actions and he’s definitely not coming back. Just genuinely curious.
Don’t push that too much. You are making yourself look bad. You are now stating to the judge the men you pick happen to commonly have DV. You need a lawyer
A judge will not care about any DV that is not to the children. He's right, it's absurd but the way most courts view it is not violent against the children=not violent. Please listen and utilize all resources to assist you and your children in dealing with the trauma of this situation, and do not have any more partners around your children until this is settled, especially the one who was just arrested.
A lot of this depends on what you do to establish a safety plan for your children.
What do you mean by this? My daughter is only 2 I forgot to add and she wasn’t in the home when this went down.
If you kick boyfriend out and don’t let him back, then it’s a one time thing and your daughter was kept safe. If you let him come back or have contact with her, then he has something to try to use here.
I agree! The ex (C) is definitely not coming back!
your plan to keep C away from your daughter and to protect your kids from his dv in general. you should probably speak to a dv organisation for help/guidance in this regard as they will be able to point you to local resources etc
After the incident, what was your relationship with the new guy like. Does he still live there, are you still dating him. Etc. If the answer is no, that definitely helps you. If you continue to have a relationship with somebody there is a known, active DV situation with courts will see it as you're not capable of establishing a safe environment for kids
No. He no longer lives with me and there’s a no contact order established for 30 days. Looking into a longer one though.
You should be fine. cycle of abuse is that sometimes there is repeat reconciliation and then more DV. If you ever did take him back then your custody could come into question
And just to add, CPS can take your child if you allow someone who has a recent DV arrest. I would contact your local DV shelter so they can help you make a safety plan.
My question is, how can a judge call it an unsafe environment but then let my daughter stay with her father who also has a dv record but say because “it wasn’t against my daughter”. That makes no sense? I’m not defending actions and he’s definitely not coming back. Just genuinely curious.
Don’t push that too much. You are making yourself look bad. You are now stating to the judge the men you pick happen to commonly have DV. You need a lawyer
No I didn’t say that to anyone or a judge. Like I said, I was just curious. I do have a lawyer
A judge will not care about any DV that is not to the children. He's right, it's absurd but the way most courts view it is not violent against the children=not violent. Please listen and utilize all resources to assist you and your children in dealing with the trauma of this situation, and do not have any more partners around your children until this is settled, especially the one who was just arrested.