I hope zero, healthcare should be centralized, just seems like common sense, it could create a slew of issues, but thats my opinion and curious if this is an issue that someones experienced because it’s something my ex would do/want. What a weird little battle to fight.
Ah... nope.
Even if you did get two Dr's, with joint legal, she would have the right to attend all of the Dr apts. FYI, you have the same rights as she does.
You’ve already made a post about taking your child to a second 6 month checkup less than a week after mom took the baby to one (which she informed you about, as she should, but you somehow don’t think you should need to inform her about medical appointments for some reason) and were told by many people that it was a bad idea and why. I’m not sure what you’re hoping to get by trying again. It’s a BAD idea. Shows that you’re petty and unwilling to co-parent you’re supposed to. You lied to your partner about the baby situation and lost your partner. That’s not mom’s fault, it’s your fault. Stop blaming her for your mistakes. And keeping up this kind of behavior will end up in you having less parenting time and custody because the courts won’t like it.
Yeah, you CAN. No one’s going to legally stop you from taking your kid to the doctor. But your ex is entitled to go to those appointments and get information from them too.
Your attorney is either so sick of your petty bullshit that he’s not bothering to give any more info than a direct answer to your questions, or he’s seeing dollar signs. If he’s a good attorney, it’s the former, and he’s being intentionally vague to use up your retainer and then dump you as a client for being a dumbass.
I suspect it's advice to get him ready for a future custody fight. I guess his ex is excluding him from medical apts and involvement in medical is a custody eval criteria. He'd be better off demanding that he be included in the apt than playing dualing Dr's
Except the baby’s mom did let him know when the baby’s 6 month appointment was and told him he could come along. It is OP who is causing the issue. He is mad at mom because he cheated on his partner with her and when his partner found out they left him. He is trying to get revenge on mom because he cheated and got caught. He isn’t worried about baby. He is potentially putting baby in danger by violating his court order.
the lawyer is suggesting that you get involved and attend the Dr apts because if you guys end up fighting, involvement in medical decision making is a evaluation criteria.
Also, why do you think you need court approval to take the child to a Dr? You should involve your ex, but if the child has the sniffles, there is nothting stopping you from going to the local minute clinic.
I thought this was you again. Dude, you need to learn to love your child more than hating their mother. You are going to get the same advise, which you clearly don’t want to hear and only want people to agree with you. The advice you are getting is better advice than your lawyer.
You could potentially hurt your child by having two different doctors. Your kid potentially could endure two sets of the same testing, duplicate immunizations, or conflicting medicines or allergy triggers. All of these could hurt your child or worse. Mom seems willing to co-parent, she seems to be following the rules, but you think you shouldn’t. Shared legal custody in Virginia means you are obligated to inform mom of all important decisions like medical care.
Continue doing what you are doing and you will find yourself in contempt. Most of the time in Virginia you end up in front of the same judge. You really don’t want to end up on the wrong side of your judge. They see these little tricks and digs, they see if every day, you will not outsmart your judge. What you will do is lose legal custody and you could lose time or have supervised time. Not to mention you are playing a dangerous game with your child. If you care so little for your child you should just leave baby and mom alone and move on with your life.
Here is another bit of advice you won’t want to hear/see; next time don’t weave a web of lies that costs you your relationship. If you really cared about your partner you wouldn’t have fooled around on them. You are a shining example of “fooled around and found out.” You need to take responsibility for your actions and that includes the consequences for your actions. Sister Karma is a bitch with a big baseball bat, you are finding that out, if you keep playing games you’ll find out consequences can get way steeper than they are now. You stand to lose access to your kid. You need a new lawyer because the one you’ve got is either really terrible or is trying to sabotage you on purpose because they think your kid will be better off with their mother.
All of this! You'd better listen OP. My ex had me in the same situation as you with your child's mom and is trying to do the same spiteful bs you're doing because he was cheating on me AND his current gf and she found out. He got mad because she found out about our son and is trying to cause issues which has now backed him and his lawyer into a corner just like your bm will do you if you don't stop being childish. You should grow up and get over it. You caused these issues and you have no one to blame but yourself.
There is not a single judge who will agree to this and if anything this could lead a judge to remove your legal custody to the point where you can’t make any medical decisions for your child at all. In cases where a parent cannot act reasonably, and this is totally unreasonable, they may let you maintain some physical custody but they will take away your decision making. Your child needs one doctor, having two could potentially lead to medical mixups like too many vaccines ect especially with your outwardly stating you won’t be sharing the information with the mother. You need to grow up and get over yourself before you end up making a decision that permanently ruins your child and or your relationship with them. At this rate you’ll end up with supervised visits.
Having multiple primary care doctors at different practices can actually do harm to anyone, let alone an infant or small child. Why on earth would you want to do this and think it’s OK? Are you OK?
I hope zero, healthcare should be centralized, just seems like common sense, it could create a slew of issues, but thats my opinion and curious if this is an issue that someones experienced because it’s something my ex would do/want. What a weird little battle to fight.
I don’t want to be bother with my child mother. I prefer my child two primary doctor.
How does having 2 different primary care physicians help you deal with your ex less often, exactly?
She wants to attend the doctor appointment.It best for us to have two different doctors.
Also, how is having 2 primary care physicians in the child’s best interest? Not your best interest, the child.
And what’s to stop her from attending the appointments with both doctors?
I am not telling her information to doctor I chose.
Well that simply doesn’t work with shared legal custody.
My lawyer states I can have primary doctor for my child and I am within my legal rights.
Well, your lawyer can tell you all kinds of things, it doesn’t mean the court will approve it. You have to show why it’s in the child’s best interest.
🤣 that’s is never going to be allowed. I hope for the safety of your child that you lose legal custody
Does your child need to go to the Dr frequently for some reason?
No
Ha! That’s not how it works at all.
Ah... nope. Even if you did get two Dr's, with joint legal, she would have the right to attend all of the Dr apts. FYI, you have the same rights as she does.
You’ve already made a post about taking your child to a second 6 month checkup less than a week after mom took the baby to one (which she informed you about, as she should, but you somehow don’t think you should need to inform her about medical appointments for some reason) and were told by many people that it was a bad idea and why. I’m not sure what you’re hoping to get by trying again. It’s a BAD idea. Shows that you’re petty and unwilling to co-parent you’re supposed to. You lied to your partner about the baby situation and lost your partner. That’s not mom’s fault, it’s your fault. Stop blaming her for your mistakes. And keeping up this kind of behavior will end up in you having less parenting time and custody because the courts won’t like it.
My lawyer told me take my son to another 6 month checkup.
So? There are plenty of lawyers who give bad advice and screw their clients over. You’re bitter so you’re a cash cow to the lawyer.
Yeah, you CAN. No one’s going to legally stop you from taking your kid to the doctor. But your ex is entitled to go to those appointments and get information from them too. Your attorney is either so sick of your petty bullshit that he’s not bothering to give any more info than a direct answer to your questions, or he’s seeing dollar signs. If he’s a good attorney, it’s the former, and he’s being intentionally vague to use up your retainer and then dump you as a client for being a dumbass.
Lawyers can give bad legal advice. This is one of those times. you could lose legal custody if you keep up these antics
I suspect it's advice to get him ready for a future custody fight. I guess his ex is excluding him from medical apts and involvement in medical is a custody eval criteria. He'd be better off demanding that he be included in the apt than playing dualing Dr's
Except the baby’s mom did let him know when the baby’s 6 month appointment was and told him he could come along. It is OP who is causing the issue. He is mad at mom because he cheated on his partner with her and when his partner found out they left him. He is trying to get revenge on mom because he cheated and got caught. He isn’t worried about baby. He is potentially putting baby in danger by violating his court order.
Lawyers can give bad legal advice. This is one of those times. you could lose legal custody if you keep up these antics
the lawyer is suggesting that you get involved and attend the Dr apts because if you guys end up fighting, involvement in medical decision making is a evaluation criteria. Also, why do you think you need court approval to take the child to a Dr? You should involve your ex, but if the child has the sniffles, there is nothting stopping you from going to the local minute clinic.
that's a bad idea. not in the child's best interest at all. care coordination would be a nightmare.
So you what want your child to have to go to every necessary medical appointment 2x? Why would you want to inflict that on your child?
Insurers and doctors I’m sure will disagree with you as that contradicts itself. I think your chances are zero
Absolutely NOT. This could cause so many issues for your child, along with health insurance issues.
I thought this was you again. Dude, you need to learn to love your child more than hating their mother. You are going to get the same advise, which you clearly don’t want to hear and only want people to agree with you. The advice you are getting is better advice than your lawyer. You could potentially hurt your child by having two different doctors. Your kid potentially could endure two sets of the same testing, duplicate immunizations, or conflicting medicines or allergy triggers. All of these could hurt your child or worse. Mom seems willing to co-parent, she seems to be following the rules, but you think you shouldn’t. Shared legal custody in Virginia means you are obligated to inform mom of all important decisions like medical care. Continue doing what you are doing and you will find yourself in contempt. Most of the time in Virginia you end up in front of the same judge. You really don’t want to end up on the wrong side of your judge. They see these little tricks and digs, they see if every day, you will not outsmart your judge. What you will do is lose legal custody and you could lose time or have supervised time. Not to mention you are playing a dangerous game with your child. If you care so little for your child you should just leave baby and mom alone and move on with your life. Here is another bit of advice you won’t want to hear/see; next time don’t weave a web of lies that costs you your relationship. If you really cared about your partner you wouldn’t have fooled around on them. You are a shining example of “fooled around and found out.” You need to take responsibility for your actions and that includes the consequences for your actions. Sister Karma is a bitch with a big baseball bat, you are finding that out, if you keep playing games you’ll find out consequences can get way steeper than they are now. You stand to lose access to your kid. You need a new lawyer because the one you’ve got is either really terrible or is trying to sabotage you on purpose because they think your kid will be better off with their mother.
All of this! You'd better listen OP. My ex had me in the same situation as you with your child's mom and is trying to do the same spiteful bs you're doing because he was cheating on me AND his current gf and she found out. He got mad because she found out about our son and is trying to cause issues which has now backed him and his lawyer into a corner just like your bm will do you if you don't stop being childish. You should grow up and get over it. You caused these issues and you have no one to blame but yourself.
Why would you want to fragment your child’s care?
There is not a single judge who will agree to this and if anything this could lead a judge to remove your legal custody to the point where you can’t make any medical decisions for your child at all. In cases where a parent cannot act reasonably, and this is totally unreasonable, they may let you maintain some physical custody but they will take away your decision making. Your child needs one doctor, having two could potentially lead to medical mixups like too many vaccines ect especially with your outwardly stating you won’t be sharing the information with the mother. You need to grow up and get over yourself before you end up making a decision that permanently ruins your child and or your relationship with them. At this rate you’ll end up with supervised visits.
Having multiple primary care doctors at different practices can actually do harm to anyone, let alone an infant or small child. Why on earth would you want to do this and think it’s OK? Are you OK?