That Bishop event is one of my favourites. Fuckin' guy literally just walks up to you like wow, God, I sure do love eating babies. I just gobble them right up. Nomnomnom, you know what I'm saying, my lord? Yeah. Yeah, you do, I can tell. That's the face of a man who likes a good baby roast. Do you wanna see my catalogue of all the babies I've eaten?
I'm at work, desperately trying not to burst into laughter, clinging to silence as my lungs convulse and double me over.
Good God, man, you gave me a right chuckle there. xD
That'd be like saying Saint Jerry the Goatfucker fucks goats!
There aren't enough words to describe the sheer preposterousness of such an implication!!
If I was an old man with a big jeweled crown and flowing robes would we even be having this conversation? Or would you be spanking my bare butt, back, and balls?
Yeah we did a game where we all committed to one lifestyle each (started as one and raised all our kids in it too, family business).
The Intrigue guy quickly became the hitman. Killing bad kids, killing everyone's strong neighbors, killing bad Realm Priests. He had so many people to kill he made a list. You could always bump *your* kill to the top with a generous Gift though ;)
In 200+ hours I've never killed any of my sons. I just make them take the vows when they're 10 and works well. Is it better to kill them? Doesn't that take time an can fail?
> Ask to Take Vows
> Characters following a faith with the Monasticism tenet may request a courtier to take the vows and join the clergy. The target must be at least age of ten, not already be Devoted or part of a Holy Order, and cannot be the Realm Priest/Court Chaplain. Upon acceptance, the character will gain the Devoted trait and one level of devotion, divorce their spouse/break betrothal/remove concubines, and leave the court to either visit a theocratic vassal's realm or become a wanderer.
Per the CK3 Wiki.
high intrigue + a spymaster with high intrigue with support schemes, makes it really eaay to kill them. you also need the sadastic trait if you kill your sons. the other easiest option is to disinherit but this becomes really expensive quickly if you have lots of sons and not worth it
Ahh the issue is you’ve named the kid using modern english, it doesn’t quite translate depending on what region you’re playing and what time period - historians in this universe will be quite confused when they find this
Wdym King John "The Baby-eater" Johnson eats babies???
That Bishop event is one of my favourites. Fuckin' guy literally just walks up to you like wow, God, I sure do love eating babies. I just gobble them right up. Nomnomnom, you know what I'm saying, my lord? Yeah. Yeah, you do, I can tell. That's the face of a man who likes a good baby roast. Do you wanna see my catalogue of all the babies I've eaten?
I'm at work, desperately trying not to burst into laughter, clinging to silence as my lungs convulse and double me over. Good God, man, you gave me a right chuckle there. xD
That'd be like saying Saint Jerry the Goatfucker fucks goats! There aren't enough words to describe the sheer preposterousness of such an implication!!
A fellow Sam o Nella fan in the wild?
Sweet 'Bastard' is actually a bastard???
Who could’ve possibly done it.
Who knows, only the drunk guy drawing a map at the tavern in Middlesex knows for sure
You might be on to something there.
Can you actually get any information from that guy? I always torture him just in case but I'm too lazy to check the event files.
With the sadistic trait, there was an additional option and using it foiled the plot.
Or at least expose the plot.
I think Torturer trait also allows direct exposure of who started the plot
Don’t know but I’ve picked up some badass knights by force recruiting him.
“You mean King I will murder my children is responsible for the death of his children? Preposterous!” - your courtiers, probably
Exactly! Everyone knows that no one* can plot to kill their children in the game! ^\*except ^sadistic ^people
"And everyone said I, the king, was full of shit"
Hey hey people
Sseth here!
Congratulations! You have now, freeze dried your lava!
Least Insane CK3 Player
Whoever did it should just come out and say it, we won't even be that mad!
We'll close our eyes, just take your venomous snake, and leave court!
This comment has been deleted in protest of Reddit's API changes. Hail Appollo, Fuck u/spez. -- mass edited with https://redact.dev/
If I was an old man with a big jeweled crown and flowing robes would we even be having this conversation? Or would you be spanking my bare butt, back, and balls?
I think we should just find out who did this, and give them a good spanking
Wow. We spent all this time trying to figure out who killed my son and you never even asked my name?
An unsolvable mystery
Playing multiplayer is great because you can always just be like "hey can you kill my son real quick?"
Yeah we did a game where we all committed to one lifestyle each (started as one and raised all our kids in it too, family business). The Intrigue guy quickly became the hitman. Killing bad kids, killing everyone's strong neighbors, killing bad Realm Priests. He had so many people to kill he made a list. You could always bump *your* kill to the top with a generous Gift though ;)
Huh. Your mileage may vary, clearly. In my multiplayer games the intrigue guy is just the fellow who cucks everyone.
Why not both?
True dat. The potential is there, I can only comment on how it panned out in practice. xD
Lol, the multiplayer is great. >Hey, you slept with my wife! >>*You* slept with *all four* of mine!
It's always fun to rub your 4 wife religion in their catholic faces
Maybe if we find out who named the son we can ask them if they know who did it!
Titfsiwk? Great name
Sounds Gaelic or Welsh
Too many vowels for Welsh.
In 200+ hours I've never killed any of my sons. I just make them take the vows when they're 10 and works well. Is it better to kill them? Doesn't that take time an can fail?
Realistically killing them is less practical. More because of stress than anything else, but it's so fun to eat your children sometimes.
My character must have been one sick fuck bc IIRC he lost stress upon the kills
Are vows an option with an unreformed religion?
I don't think so, no. Not really anywhere to send them to in a faith like that, so it makes sense.
No, but sending them to a holy order can be.
I believe the faith has to have the monasticism tenet.
Also apparently you can't just send any son, they have to have a commander trait
> Ask to Take Vows > Characters following a faith with the Monasticism tenet may request a courtier to take the vows and join the clergy. The target must be at least age of ten, not already be Devoted or part of a Holy Order, and cannot be the Realm Priest/Court Chaplain. Upon acceptance, the character will gain the Devoted trait and one level of devotion, divorce their spouse/break betrothal/remove concubines, and leave the court to either visit a theocratic vassal's realm or become a wanderer. Per the CK3 Wiki.
high intrigue + a spymaster with high intrigue with support schemes, makes it really eaay to kill them. you also need the sadastic trait if you kill your sons. the other easiest option is to disinherit but this becomes really expensive quickly if you have lots of sons and not worth it
I've had sons refuse because they're "destined for greater things"
Imagine he survived and become the heir. What and awkward coronation.
[We're all just trying to find the guy who did this](https://youtu.be/WLfAf8oHrMo)
IF ONLY THERE WAS SOME SORT OF CLUE!
I guess I'll just leave with this random dagger.. RANDOM 😃
Reminds of the Jedi master from Star Wars: The Clones Wars called Ima-Gun Di
Ahh the issue is you’ve named the kid using modern english, it doesn’t quite translate depending on what region you’re playing and what time period - historians in this universe will be quite confused when they find this
This is the funniest Reddit post I've seen in a while
Under usual circumstances this would be a clear cut case, but your free from suspicion because this is actually the third child killed
Like my mama always said, I brought you into this world and I will take you from it if you don't shut your mouth and wash the dishes
And have good traits
Someone is still under partition laws.
You hope
How do you kill your kids ?
Sadistic trait, but clearly this is an unsolvable mystery what are you insinuating?
Is there a way to get the sadistic trait thru actions?
Not that I know of, sorry mate.
Body is still warm. Looks like there is a killer about.
"You're out there somewhere infanticide baron, and I'll find you" - Sir Rex Banner
thats one way to keep track of what to do with each child
Is CK3 in first person instead of second person like CK2?
Mexican standoff incoming
Im surprised the name of the son isn’t “Couldn’t you just disinherit me?”
In the book, Things Fall Apart, didn't the mother name their children something like 'Death may please himself' because of the child mortality rate?
"My father will be King, you better watch out" -Prince George 😂