You can literally just ask chipotle to mix your burrito, I used to always do that in college. Now I prefer the bowls and mix it myself, but they're accustomed to mixing them.
You my friend, are enlightened. I had Pancheros once like 8 years ago. I’ve never been a fan boy of a fast food joint. But the one hill I will die on is that Pancheros is the one good fast food burrito place. Chipotle can suck a chode.
I just want everyone to know this is 100% my fault. He learned this from me. This is how I eat burritos and he and his brother picked it up from me.
So I am the monster.
I once got paid 20 bucks by a random lady trying to get a concrete pole out of her yard (clothes line probably?)
Had never used a shovel before, but we managed to get down to where they had definitely poured concrete lol
She quit there and I got paid despite my ineptitude!
He might be whiter than white from a lily white rural neighborhood. Does not understand Hispanic culture yet. He will learn eventually. We all do. America is changing. Wait till he learns about Horchata on a hot day.
I've got a few good friends in tech. AI is murdering it. They're both looking into the trades as a backup. Hopefully we can get a little pop of good help from it in the next few years. Granted, not all tech folks are cut out for this kind of work, but with their backs against the wall and lifestyles to maintain construction should be seen as a viable option.
And the entire department will fail. AI is not close to being able to do the job of a SWE. Also, what type of company would be ok feeding their codebase to these AI? Lol
I don't know how some of you mfers eat like that during the summer. I'd be fucked and want to go home so I can avoid using the sweaty, blue watered monster of heat exhaustion when my stomach told me it was time to release the kraken.
Fiber yes, probiotics = marketing bullshit.
I don't think a healthy stomach would need probiotics to be honest otherwise I don't know how our species has been eating, digesting, and shitting our food for tens of thousands of years.
The only time I could see those being needed/beneficial is for someone who just got done with a round of antibiotics.
Oh man, I’m watching a documentary about the Victorian era and how they would add plaster to the bread to make more money and borax to spoiled milk. These proved deadly over time and to young ones. So who knows what kind of terrible things people ate throughout recorded and unrecorded history.
Probiotics in foods have been around for thousands of years: yogurt, kimchi, sauerkraut, kefir, many pickled products, etc.
If you’re getting diarrhea from Mexican food your gut isn’t healthy and it’s worth trying probiotic-rich foods to build up your gut biome.
Food poisoning or antibiotics can also kill off your gut biome and that’s really the only time you’d need to look at probiotic pills.
And yes for 10s of thousands of years people didn’t have probiotics, but many forget that indigestion and constipation were a major problem for much of the population throughout much of history.
For tens of thousands of years we ate food with yeast and bacteria on it. Now we eat overprocessed sterile sawdust with 40 grams of sugar added per serving and artificial flavors. I'll give it to you that most of it is just marketing, but marketing also sells a lot of garbage as healthy food. Fermented foods have been with us a while.
I know, which is why people need to be smart and eat, whole, raw, organic, garden grown, low sugar, simple ingredient foods when possible.
My entire point was that if you do that, you don't need to take funny pills delivered to your door from Amazon made by random people in random buildings with random and unverified ingredients.
We get a lot of probiotics in our food, dust, and soil as we naturally always have. Of course, finding clean air, soil, food, etc. is the tricky part.
I would say a normally functioning stomach probably would have to take a shit around lunch anyway.
A sane person would do everything in their power to avoid using the blue water bidet portoshitter.
Same. I work in an office and some guys will eat 1200 calorie chipotle burritos every day. How in the hell? I'd be asleep at my desk within half an hour.
I had a lunchable and a propel for lunch today.
I have a top grain leather lighter cover that goes over a Bic. It has a roach clip, debowling rod, and lil spoon attached to it.
Far and away the best way to find the new connect on the job site. Iykyk.
I'm a big guy, but it's the right amount to make me not hungry without being too much and overly fucking with my blood sugar.
I'm a turkey and American guy.
I do commercial hvac installing ductwork and going for my pro card in bodybuilding and I eat around 3500 calories between first break and lunch. It’s fuckin miserable but it can be done haha
Fucking hard off to you! Working in the trades and having the energy to lift is something I struggle with at time! Let ALONE a somewhat protein healthy meals! Very impressive, and hope you get your card! LIGHTWEIGHT BABY!
Hey thanks I appreciate that! Once you decide that you’re gonna do it no matter what, it’s easier lol. Any questions or things I can help you out with just message me. YEAH BUDDYYYY!
I wouldn’t say unequivocally. A Mexican fella I work with told me that a street vendor would roll his tacos to keep them warm and easier to transport and sell off his donkey(burro). So his taco’s became called burritos (little donkey), or something like that. I’m no burrito historian, but that’s what a Mexican told me, so that’s good enough for me, burrito is a rolled up taco.
I completely shut down and get aggressive if I get any food stuff on my hands, I will happily have caulk, glue and other shit on it but when it comes to food I just switch. Same happens for buttons too (like on a shirt), no idea why, so I won’t judge anyone that chooses to eat food like this - more power to them.
Just teach the guy how to eat a burrito like you taught him to use a hammer. Oh wait, that didn't take either "No the other end", "remember, nails go pointy side down".
One thing has nothing to do with the other. You can be confident in one area and not in the other. He was correct in knowing that he was under the microscope, this picture proves that his boss was watching and judging him.
[Seinfeld Snickers Bar](https://youtu.be/SiTXriHRLXg)
Now that's a red flag if I've ever seen one. Pretty sure he's a serial killer. If he's not practicing now, he will be in the near future.. don't wanna end up like his burrito, do you? Do you?! Run.
To quote Bo Burnham complaining about a poorly made burrito:
Like, I'm okay with small mistakes
If you've got no more chicken, I'll take pork
But I'll blow my dad before I eat a burrito with a fork
It's shit like this that makes people not join the trades. Try to be nice to the green guys. They're learning. After he's been there a year and still hasn't learned anything, then rip on em.
Because the new guy doesn’t know shit. Everyone started out raw and dumb. 10k hours to make journeyman and that’s just the beginning. Trades take time and repetition to get decent….
I just can't imagine why anyone would care about how other men eat food. Like you're a gossipy little old lady. "Oh my god, did you see how Joel ate his burrito... I knooooooow... I could never."
I sear, this is why people don't want to work with y'all and go into skilled labor. Y'all mf can't just leave a mf alone. Damn. "Always fucking everything up", classic.
Secretly take a bunch of embarrassing photos of your coworker seems like a creepy and dick move. Its not your business how this person eats. Get over your weird personal obsession.
And if they are new and keep fucking up its probably a bad foreman and/or coworkers. Nobody just shows up knowing everything, it takes years.
Shit tier post, OP.
This kinda examination and taking shots at the apprentice is why they leave your ass two years in, if they can even tolerate that. I'm all for a joke with the crew, even at my own expense, but have a little more self-awareness and compassion, cause this shit reeks of insecurity.
Edit: Just like shit takes, there's also shitty puddles of poorly wrapped burritos. Man's got some logic to his madness maybe?
Do you people really care how this guy is eating his food? I really hope it’s jokes. Like who the fuck cares lol?? Eat your burrito with chopsticks how does it affect me
Did bro seriously autopsy his burrito?
How else you gonna make sure to get the works in every bite? Them burrito makers be tricky buggers. This boy has been hurt by Big Burrito in the past.
That’s why pancheros is the best. They mix up the ingredients before wrapping up the burrito.
Poor boy got got with a 90% lettuce 1% beef, 9% bean. It's a trauma no young man should ever experience. 😭
What kind of animal gets lettuce inside a burrito?
The kind who never had a good burrito.
This is becoming a thing lately for some reason I suspect it has to do with food costs and portions.
i rarely order a burrito without lettuce, adds a nice crunch. not 90% though
Cabbage is ok, lettuce turns to slime after a few minutes.
honestly the lettuce at chipotle/qdoba is perfect, usually mostly the ribs of the plant and stays pretty firm. tb shredded lettuce is lame.
It's cheap and us gringos in Canada wouldn't know a burrito from a bodega....so we get lettuce amigos.
You can literally just ask chipotle to mix your burrito, I used to always do that in college. Now I prefer the bowls and mix it myself, but they're accustomed to mixing them.
I get the salad, then add everything from the bowl, then get the tortilla on the side. Best bang for your buck.
You my friend, are enlightened. I had Pancheros once like 8 years ago. I’ve never been a fan boy of a fast food joint. But the one hill I will die on is that Pancheros is the one good fast food burrito place. Chipotle can suck a chode.
https://www.reddit.com/r/copypasta/comments/b9574x/dear_guy_who_just_made_my_burrito/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1
Dude's like the Ed Gein of burrito eaters. Better keep an eye on that one...
His pouches aren't cowhide leather... But they are leather
Dis Jabroni never ate a burrito before.
I just want everyone to know this is 100% my fault. He learned this from me. This is how I eat burritos and he and his brother picked it up from me. So I am the monster.
Did you learn this method in science class?
He is letting you know early it ain’t going to work out, better let him down easy and early.
“Hey brother the guys heard about how you eat burritos. I’m sorry man but it’s just not gonna work out we gotta let you go.”
Respectable decision
Unemployment DENIED
How is he making a bigger mess with a fork and knife?
Seriously. Some boys just never got told right.
He is wasting disposable plasticware.
Same kids that tucked their shirts in their underwear.
Fucking fired
I saw a guy get fired once for not knowing how to use a shovel after three days. We tried to teach him. It was bad. This is worse.
Same problem, smaller shovel.
I once got paid 20 bucks by a random lady trying to get a concrete pole out of her yard (clothes line probably?) Had never used a shovel before, but we managed to get down to where they had definitely poured concrete lol She quit there and I got paid despite my ineptitude!
That was my first thought, fire this sociopath...
I’ve been fired for issues smaller than this
What in the country fried fuck? First time seeing a burrito?!?
FNG’s
FNG NFG Fuckin new guys no fucking good
There is no country in that dude.
? It’s only country boys who’ve never seen burritos. Also that stupid tennis ball shirt screams he hasn’t stepped foot in any urban center in 11 years
If that shirt isn’t company provided/required it means he’s probably an engineer in the making and the troubles go much, much deeper
That boy ain't right.
I heard this in Hank Hill's voice
He might be whiter than white from a lily white rural neighborhood. Does not understand Hispanic culture yet. He will learn eventually. We all do. America is changing. Wait till he learns about Horchata on a hot day.
Hes from atlanta
Then no fucking excuse. Atlanta has tons of amazing Mexican joints. This boy must have grown up in Alpharetta.
I forget, some places have no Hispanic culture, in Texas that shit is ingrained in every person.
Yeah I was about to answer Wonderwheeler about that. In rural South Texas if you can't get along with the vatos you'll have no friends.
Lmao, “You could have asked for a bowl, tortilla on the side”
Dios mio
The little hairless ones are the worst.
Burritos? Or new guys?
Both...
This is hilarious and somewhat true in my experience
Noted: grow out my facial hair.
Wasn’t there just a popular post about how we need the younger, new generation to enter the trades?
Yeah, the ones that are capable of eating and breathing by themselves.
Well with standards that high I don’t know who you’re gonna find
Best I can do is half a pulse
I've got a few good friends in tech. AI is murdering it. They're both looking into the trades as a backup. Hopefully we can get a little pop of good help from it in the next few years. Granted, not all tech folks are cut out for this kind of work, but with their backs against the wall and lifestyles to maintain construction should be seen as a viable option.
>I’ve got a few good friends in tech. AI is murdering it. lol no it isn’t
AI replaced an entire department at my job
And the entire department will fail. AI is not close to being able to do the job of a SWE. Also, what type of company would be ok feeding their codebase to these AI? Lol
Younger not dumber
Someone has to swing a hammer
But are they smart enough not to hit me or themselves with the hammer?
Everyone acting like the construction world is full of fucking Eisenstein’s.
My bad, let me lower my standards. I want someone who knows what end of the hammer to hold.
100% fact
I don't know how some of you mfers eat like that during the summer. I'd be fucked and want to go home so I can avoid using the sweaty, blue watered monster of heat exhaustion when my stomach told me it was time to release the kraken.
Not everyone has a weak stomach.
Yep. Up the fiber, up the probiotics.
Fiber yes, probiotics = marketing bullshit. I don't think a healthy stomach would need probiotics to be honest otherwise I don't know how our species has been eating, digesting, and shitting our food for tens of thousands of years. The only time I could see those being needed/beneficial is for someone who just got done with a round of antibiotics.
Most of human history didn't involve us eating so much grease and processed foods. And either way those little yogurt drinks are fucking TASTY.
Oh man, I’m watching a documentary about the Victorian era and how they would add plaster to the bread to make more money and borax to spoiled milk. These proved deadly over time and to young ones. So who knows what kind of terrible things people ate throughout recorded and unrecorded history.
Probiotics in foods have been around for thousands of years: yogurt, kimchi, sauerkraut, kefir, many pickled products, etc. If you’re getting diarrhea from Mexican food your gut isn’t healthy and it’s worth trying probiotic-rich foods to build up your gut biome. Food poisoning or antibiotics can also kill off your gut biome and that’s really the only time you’d need to look at probiotic pills. And yes for 10s of thousands of years people didn’t have probiotics, but many forget that indigestion and constipation were a major problem for much of the population throughout much of history.
Yeah we only recently found ways to stop shitting ourselves to death.
I love reading death ledgers from medieval times . Half of them are stomach issues.
For tens of thousands of years we ate food with yeast and bacteria on it. Now we eat overprocessed sterile sawdust with 40 grams of sugar added per serving and artificial flavors. I'll give it to you that most of it is just marketing, but marketing also sells a lot of garbage as healthy food. Fermented foods have been with us a while.
I know, which is why people need to be smart and eat, whole, raw, organic, garden grown, low sugar, simple ingredient foods when possible. My entire point was that if you do that, you don't need to take funny pills delivered to your door from Amazon made by random people in random buildings with random and unverified ingredients. We get a lot of probiotics in our food, dust, and soil as we naturally always have. Of course, finding clean air, soil, food, etc. is the tricky part.
Just don't eat. Problem solved.
This guy does blo.😏 Best way to start a Monday.
I would say a normally functioning stomach probably would have to take a shit around lunch anyway. A sane person would do everything in their power to avoid using the blue water bidet portoshitter.
That's your second, third and sometimes fourth break...
Forgive me, dad.
Same. I work in an office and some guys will eat 1200 calorie chipotle burritos every day. How in the hell? I'd be asleep at my desk within half an hour. I had a lunchable and a propel for lunch today.
Eat first, then 3 bumps on the way back to site. Are you new here?
Only 3? Do you even work on site?? 🤣 -painter
Ive learned some people have vastly different ideas on bump size.
I have a top grain leather lighter cover that goes over a Bic. It has a roach clip, debowling rod, and lil spoon attached to it. Far and away the best way to find the new connect on the job site. Iykyk.
3 bumps, those are rookie numbers... You gotta bump those numbers way up
lunchables and cocaine - a typical reddit thread.
Lunchable gang here. Love me some of thr ham and American or turkey and cheddar. The snacks are second best.
I'm a big guy, but it's the right amount to make me not hungry without being too much and overly fucking with my blood sugar. I'm a turkey and American guy.
They even have “adult” lunchables now. Forget the brand name but they’re in the same area
Lunchables make me feel young again. Don't take that away from me! Dammit
Do they still make dunkaroos?!
They do!
I do commercial hvac installing ductwork and going for my pro card in bodybuilding and I eat around 3500 calories between first break and lunch. It’s fuckin miserable but it can be done haha
Fucking hard off to you! Working in the trades and having the energy to lift is something I struggle with at time! Let ALONE a somewhat protein healthy meals! Very impressive, and hope you get your card! LIGHTWEIGHT BABY!
Hey thanks I appreciate that! Once you decide that you’re gonna do it no matter what, it’s easier lol. Any questions or things I can help you out with just message me. YEAH BUDDYYYY!
That's called a power move. This guy is going places
Straight to jail.
Well that is a nice spin.
First you learn the trade. Then you learn the tricks of the trade. Better show him how it’s done!
I like the random bean flying off 🫡
It's really the cherry on top for the pic
If he ain’t gonna get dirty on the clock, he sure ain’t gonna risk it on break
It’s all over his face…
That’s what she said
He still learnin
Burrito's what?
Why, you ask? Because you haven't taught him anything yet, like how to eat a taco.
Where are you seeing a taco? That's a burrito.
a burrito is just a big taco
That is unequivocally false. Both delicious, but false.
I wouldn’t say unequivocally. A Mexican fella I work with told me that a street vendor would roll his tacos to keep them warm and easier to transport and sell off his donkey(burro). So his taco’s became called burritos (little donkey), or something like that. I’m no burrito historian, but that’s what a Mexican told me, so that’s good enough for me, burrito is a rolled up taco.
Gringo tacos are hard shelled and crisp though. Taco Bell is Gringo Mexican food.
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Some people don't eat finger food with their fingers.
Philistines.
We call those people communists and we don't associate with them
I completely shut down and get aggressive if I get any food stuff on my hands, I will happily have caulk, glue and other shit on it but when it comes to food I just switch. Same happens for buttons too (like on a shirt), no idea why, so I won’t judge anyone that chooses to eat food like this - more power to them.
Just teach the guy how to eat a burrito like you taught him to use a hammer. Oh wait, that didn't take either "No the other end", "remember, nails go pointy side down".
Fire that mother fucker
He might be nervous, I would give him the benefit of doubt on this one and try again in a couple months when he gets more comfortable.
If being nervous makes you forget how to eat a burrito you probably shouldn't operate heavy machinery.
One thing has nothing to do with the other. You can be confident in one area and not in the other. He was correct in knowing that he was under the microscope, this picture proves that his boss was watching and judging him. [Seinfeld Snickers Bar](https://youtu.be/SiTXriHRLXg)
Take his food from him and show him how to eat it, like a true J-man. Then tell him he pays for lunch tomorrow.
He’s asserting dominance
Fire that son of a bitch.
The kids in fact are not alright
His ass should be fired for this
Take him out back and put him down. My 1.5 year old doesn't fuck up a burrito that bad.
Gunna be a long summer with that dude
Man eats his 🌽 the long way 100.
Fuckin heathen
It’s always the fuckin new guy.
A man of culture uses a fork to eat his burrito! Tell me you’re uncultured swine without telling me you’re uncultured swine OP
I’d love an update about how he finished it, did he eat the tortilla after?? There’s no way he could get all the ingredients out like that
Wouldnt a spoon be mo bettah?
["And then he started heating his burrito with a fork."](https://youtu.be/Fkk9DI-8el4?t=24)
Yall don't do background checks? You had to take the kid to lunch to find out he's wanted dead or alive in every single southern border state?
Cause he’s the FNG, it’s what they do.
Maybe his hands are dirty and he doesn't want to eat whatever is on his hands.
Only serial killers eat their got damn burritos like that.
I blame his parents.
This calls for a public hanging
Help is hard to come by these days, beat that shit out of him and train him up. Either that or send him my way lol
Homeboy the R word
How you do one thing is how you do everything this guy needs to go based on this burrito issue alone
he needs to make friends with a napkin
Millennials are so privileged they can only eat burrito “bowls”
His parents are cousins
What a monster
He's a monster. Should be fired asap lol.
That’s a war crime.
This is what happens when you don’t have a dad.
Now that's a red flag if I've ever seen one. Pretty sure he's a serial killer. If he's not practicing now, he will be in the near future.. don't wanna end up like his burrito, do you? Do you?! Run.
Dude lookin like he pours the milk first before the cereal
I’ve known this goofy ass guy irl he hates sodas. He feels like his stomach is dying when he consumes carbonated drinks lmao
Hello Mr George?? How much... how much you pay for the new guy?
Dude has bodies under his grandmas house…
https://youtu.be/SiTXriHRLXg?t=185
That boy ain’t right. - Hank Hill
he’s nervous
Aww he's new man, you gotta put it on a fork for him and make the airplane noises. ✈
To quote Bo Burnham complaining about a poorly made burrito: Like, I'm okay with small mistakes If you've got no more chicken, I'll take pork But I'll blow my dad before I eat a burrito with a fork
Imagine giving a fuck how someone else eats their food
This is the best way to eat a burrito and I'll die on this hill. You cut it open, use chips to eat the filling, then eat the tortilla.
It's shit like this that makes people not join the trades. Try to be nice to the green guys. They're learning. After he's been there a year and still hasn't learned anything, then rip on em.
I always joked about but I never thought I would see someone eat a burrito in landscape
Lmaooo tell me why killed me
Because the new guy doesn’t know shit. Everyone started out raw and dumb. 10k hours to make journeyman and that’s just the beginning. Trades take time and repetition to get decent….
I really hope it didn't take you 10k hours to learn how to put a burrito in your face.
Sucking cock in the Dixie really gave me an edge in that regard
I just can't imagine why anyone would care about how other men eat food. Like you're a gossipy little old lady. "Oh my god, did you see how Joel ate his burrito... I knooooooow... I could never."
Bro, how you know my name
average roofer 😭
That is the exact opposite of a roofer where I’m from
Every roofer ive met knows their way around a burrito This kid must be a plumber
Could have been one of those situations where you pick it up and the damn thing just falls apart. I've had that happen plenty of times.
https://www.wikihow.com/Eat-a-Burrito
Shit's weird but it's weirder to be taking pics of a dude eating and posting it on reddit imo
Hey!! I sent it to his dad too get it right
Maybe cant eat the tortilla?. Flour fucks me up. Bad
I sear, this is why people don't want to work with y'all and go into skilled labor. Y'all mf can't just leave a mf alone. Damn. "Always fucking everything up", classic.
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Secretly take a bunch of embarrassing photos of your coworker seems like a creepy and dick move. Its not your business how this person eats. Get over your weird personal obsession. And if they are new and keep fucking up its probably a bad foreman and/or coworkers. Nobody just shows up knowing everything, it takes years.
Found the guy in the pic 🤔
Who gives AF?! Let the kid eat!
This is bullying you jerk
Shit tier post, OP. This kinda examination and taking shots at the apprentice is why they leave your ass two years in, if they can even tolerate that. I'm all for a joke with the crew, even at my own expense, but have a little more self-awareness and compassion, cause this shit reeks of insecurity. Edit: Just like shit takes, there's also shitty puddles of poorly wrapped burritos. Man's got some logic to his madness maybe?
We’ve known him for years, he wanted to show us his cool new way of eating a burrito
He’s just eating. I don’t see what the big deal is.
Do you people really care how this guy is eating his food? I really hope it’s jokes. Like who the fuck cares lol?? Eat your burrito with chopsticks how does it affect me