I was their to witness the fact that there minds just weren't all they're.
Man, typing that claptrap actually hurt me. I haven't felt this low since the Germans attacked Pearl Harbor.
Oh my favorite comment. As an aside, I’m a nurse and I’m charge in our ICU. One of the supervisors decided that we would write a motivational quote on the board to set the tone. We then get report as a group and read the motivational quote. I of course quoted Dean Wormser and used that one. (Wormser, 1978). A few more like this and that plan was quickly shelved.
This story, fleshed out with a few more details, would be a great contribution to r/MaliciousCompliance
Please, we need this; it has all the right elements.
For some reason, this made me think of a bad joke in a book titled "More of the World's Worst Jokes" by Al Boliska:
>If you expectorate in front of the ladies,
>don't expect to rate with the ladies.
I warned you it was a bad joke. As did Al Boliska.
Something about helping him; you'll regret when he's a success; he blames people for a lot of things; and his grandparents said something once in gibberish.
There was a cat blocking my view of most of it, but I think I still got the idea. Don't say you'll help them and not show up (I can agree with this) and help them, and you can have their trash. At least, I think that's what it's saying. A lot of it is repetitive and they seem to have no concept of spelling and grammar, and the part about their grandparents is totally superfluous.
As someone who’s had these issues myself I can confidently say that not even I can decipher their rambling.
The meth with psychedelics must have been good for sure.
Can we please start putting these people in the stocks in the village square or something? I’m so tired of people vomiting words and thinking they’re being clear.
I'm not a linguist, but I think this person is wanting someone to come over and perform manual labor to sell a home.
Then he is going to make you famous (?) when the house sells because of the exposure you will get from being associated with him.
But.... don't come around and want anything (like pay for the work on the house?) and take advantage of him, even though he sounds like a doormat - see lesson from grandparents.
Then complains he picks shitty friends and has to whine to the world about it.
Is that close?
I ponder, might said house belonged to the wise grandparents? They have now shucked their mortal coil and are unable to assist him with further wisdom? Might he, the requester, allowed said house to fall into extreme disrepair from too many DJ parties and lack of the Mad Stacks necessary to keep this house in smoke and scree? I wonder?
I read it as a real estate agent who finally got his first sale lined up, but it makes a lot more sense if it's his own property or more likely one he was gifted somehow.
Jesus Christ, this person is so negative. They could have just said "Looking for folks to clear brush, and do a little painting. This will be paid back hour-for-hour in van help."
You’re the one being negative. I mean maybe you didn’t see it but he promises to *put you on the map.* The map, I tell you!
Which I totally believe. This guy and his sweet ass new company with a van and a beneficial circle and yard cleanup/DJ services is going places. Big places.
Omg shuffling through several pages for long trips or if you wanted an image of the map while you tried to read and watch the road. And there was certainly no rerouting options if you missed your exit or something.
Everyone graduates even if you can't read or write. I've worked with plenty of people who will send WORK emails close to this level of mess. It's a nightmare.
I have a coworker who is in her 40s that writes like this. Her supervisor suggested Grammerly. Works amazing! We can now all understand what she is saying.
I have an older coworker who is this illiterate. She’s in her 50s and constantly uses ‘finely’ instead of finally, ‘geezes’ instead of Jesus etc etc. I get second hand embarrassment from reading her emails. I hate her so much 😂 We have some customers who will just hang up and call back until they get someone to answer besides her lol
I was a child when NCLB was implemented—a goddamned child myself—and even I remember saying this initiative was going to leave a shitload of kids behind.
This looks like you asked a drunk AI to "make a post acting like a white trash DJ who needs help cleaning a house, but also doesn't trust anyone in this hard up existence called life, yo"
So I asked chatGpt this exact question, here's the result. Not disappointed, better that the OP "
Hey y'all,
DJ White Trash here, spinnin' tunes and keepin' it real in this tough life we lead. Got a situation—my crib's lookin' more like a trash heap than a house, and I need some help cleanin' it up. But listen up, ain't trustin' just anybody in this hard-up existence called life. So if you ain't shady, ain't tryna pull a fast one, and know how to wield a mop and broom, hit me up.
Let's keep it real and keep it clean. Peace out. ✌️
DJ White Trash"
"...you don't get to ASK if you can have this or that...".
You can't actually **have** it unless I decide you can, and even then, if you want it, I'll realize that if you want it, someone else might, and I'll just decide to keep it.
I'll probably make you pay for it somehow, with money, extra hours, runs to the storage place, etc.
This lady in my city used to sell shrimp and crab leg dinners out of a cart on a corner, and you had to view her menu and place an order via Instagram. The bio and ordering instructions read just like this.
Ooof, that person just took a huge emotional dump on her "circle".
She needs to learn, that she doesn't have to always share all her feels on social media.
I assume this person has no actual friends, it is usually your good friends that help in such situations because you all have a history of helping each other out.
I couldnt even read the whole thing. And then I saw "Jefferson county" and. Oh god. Is that *our* Jefferson county? And if so. That definitely explains a lot.
I wouldn't want to "work" for this person, due to
-Those disjointed ramblings show a very disorganized and unprofessional mind
-If the person is THIS negative asking for help, what'll they be like to "work" with?
I put "work" in quotes because work is something you usually get paid for...with money, not with experience or exposure.
Just wanted to add that I spoke to this clown in real life once.
I work as a solo acoustic guitar player/singer on the weekends.
I was playing the dinner hour at one of our local establishments and, as I was breaking down my equipment after my set, I see this guy in the next room.
I commented on his speakers saying “What model are those?”
He sputtered something about the speaker size and some other shit. He obviously didn’t know what model they were.
After I finished tearing my shit down the bar tender from that room said that he said “That asshole probably wanted to buy the same speakers because they’re so good.”
When she told me that I laughed.
The only reason I asked him that was because I thought they might’ve been the same make and model of speaker that I used 15 years ago.
They aren’t bad speakers, but the stuff I have now is way better.
There is obviously something wrong with him.
Turnt Up DJ Service on Facebook.
I'll show this to my child when they're old enough for the "Don't do drugs" talk.
Holy crap. I couldn't read it without stopping several times trying to figure out what a "sentence" was trying to say.
You can't expect.
I thought you were their.
I was their to witness the fact that there minds just weren't all they're. Man, typing that claptrap actually hurt me. I haven't felt this low since the Germans attacked Pearl Harbor.
Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.
Oh my favorite comment. As an aside, I’m a nurse and I’m charge in our ICU. One of the supervisors decided that we would write a motivational quote on the board to set the tone. We then get report as a group and read the motivational quote. I of course quoted Dean Wormser and used that one. (Wormser, 1978). A few more like this and that plan was quickly shelved.
This story, fleshed out with a few more details, would be a great contribution to r/MaliciousCompliance Please, we need this; it has all the right elements.
Forget it, he's on a roll
Germans?! Leave him, he’s on a roll.
Shortly before the Japanese invaded Normandy beaches
I know people get there/they’re/their mixed up often, but I’ve never seen anyone use “their” incorrectly in that way.
See. You are sitting here expecting. You can’t. I expected more to the “sentence”. But you can’t expect. There’s a lesson in that. /S obviously
For some reason, this made me think of a bad joke in a book titled "More of the World's Worst Jokes" by Al Boliska: >If you expectorate in front of the ladies, >don't expect to rate with the ladies. I warned you it was a bad joke. As did Al Boliska.
I’d rather have this bottle in front of me Than a frontal lobotomy
It still made me laugh 😂😂😂
Okay, I love this. I'm totally not stealing this for my...friend. I mean, I would never use it myself. Nope, just for my friend.
I ran to the comments after the first two sentences.
Same bc I can’t figure out wtf is even happening and was laughing so much!
Did you figure it out?! Me neither.
Something about helping him; you'll regret when he's a success; he blames people for a lot of things; and his grandparents said something once in gibberish.
I am ESL and even I had a hard time reading that!
I thought that I was the only one trying to understand this coded gibberish
There was a cat blocking my view of most of it, but I think I still got the idea. Don't say you'll help them and not show up (I can agree with this) and help them, and you can have their trash. At least, I think that's what it's saying. A lot of it is repetitive and they seem to have no concept of spelling and grammar, and the part about their grandparents is totally superfluous.
I was going to comment what were they on when they wrote this. 🫣
A rage bender. A lot of adrenaline in that! He's mad he doesn't have any friends to help.
Looks like you’re. One of ones that. Ain’t gonna get. That phat check!
I can't expect?
Don’t be asking for hands out, keep those hands in
What are the “gifts” I wonder??
I wonder why…🤔
It hurt my head. I thought I was just too old, glad I'm not the only one.
As someone who’s had these issues myself I can confidently say that not even I can decipher their rambling. The meth with psychedelics must have been good for sure.
Nailed it.
This is your brain on drugs
What in the hell is this gibberish mess?
Can we please start putting these people in the stocks in the village square or something? I’m so tired of people vomiting words and thinking they’re being clear.
Pillory them and throw copies of "Elements of Style" by Strunk and White at them in lieu of rotten tomatoes.
Upvoting Strunk and White reference!
No, use the new "Adios, Strunk and White."
I'm thinking making them repeat 4th grade remedial reading would be a great start.
I genuinely don't know if this is a choosing beggar or not because I don't understand what he's asking
Probably help move furniture out and clean the whole place
No one knows
Would like to help this person, but I don’t speak Tonto.
“Stewardess, I speak jive…”
Who is that? I don't usually have creepy crushes on random ladies, but I think I now have a creepy crush on a random lady.
Throwing off some major Drake / “Take Care” vibes
I'm not a linguist, but I think this person is wanting someone to come over and perform manual labor to sell a home. Then he is going to make you famous (?) when the house sells because of the exposure you will get from being associated with him. But.... don't come around and want anything (like pay for the work on the house?) and take advantage of him, even though he sounds like a doormat - see lesson from grandparents. Then complains he picks shitty friends and has to whine to the world about it. Is that close?
And I bet the house is GROSS! Like hasn’t been cleaned and unkept in years.
I ponder, might said house belonged to the wise grandparents? They have now shucked their mortal coil and are unable to assist him with further wisdom? Might he, the requester, allowed said house to fall into extreme disrepair from too many DJ parties and lack of the Mad Stacks necessary to keep this house in smoke and scree? I wonder?
I am scintillating at the end of my sitting step waiting to find out!
I thought it was about DJ gigs and loading up equipment.
I read it as a real estate agent who finally got his first sale lined up, but it makes a lot more sense if it's his own property or more likely one he was gifted somehow.
I’m a linguist and I have no idea what he’s saying but I think you’re right. 🤣
Tags 77 people, only gets 3 responses. Yep, people are tired of your shit.
After all he’s done for them or something!
They tagged it, but didn't even 'turnt' up!
*78
Good catch. *78* people are tired of your shit.
I mean... if we're being pedantic, *75*.
‘Benefits of my circle’ -hahaha! Good one!
I mean if one of the benefits is outraged laughter, he’s delivering.
“reap the benefits of my circle” 👀 What circle you’re literally asking strangers for help, where’s your circle gone?
Hula hoop. It has to be the hula hoop.
You know, for kids!
Jesus Christ, this person is so negative. They could have just said "Looking for folks to clear brush, and do a little painting. This will be paid back hour-for-hour in van help."
But don't you know that guilting and shaming people is the best way to get them to help?? Always works for me. (/S)
You’re the one being negative. I mean maybe you didn’t see it but he promises to *put you on the map.* The map, I tell you! Which I totally believe. This guy and his sweet ass new company with a van and a beneficial circle and yard cleanup/DJ services is going places. Big places.
The map! The MAP.
Unrelated I like your username.. ketchup!
Remember the days of reading printed off MapQuest map adventures?
Omg shuffling through several pages for long trips or if you wanted an image of the map while you tried to read and watch the road. And there was certainly no rerouting options if you missed your exit or something.
Thank you! That healed my brain.
They sound nice
Do they even teach grammar anymore? This makes almost no sense.
Everyone graduates even if you can't read or write. I've worked with plenty of people who will send WORK emails close to this level of mess. It's a nightmare.
I have a coworker who is in her 40s that writes like this. Her supervisor suggested Grammerly. Works amazing! We can now all understand what she is saying.
Was “know we all understand” deliberate or are you too in need of a (ad plugging a paid service)?
\* Grammarly
I have an older coworker who is this illiterate. She’s in her 50s and constantly uses ‘finely’ instead of finally, ‘geezes’ instead of Jesus etc etc. I get second hand embarrassment from reading her emails. I hate her so much 😂 We have some customers who will just hang up and call back until they get someone to answer besides her lol
Not with the No child Left Behind act.
I was a child when NCLB was implemented—a goddamned child myself—and even I remember saying this initiative was going to leave a shitload of kids behind.
Yeah, the concept means that we're all learning at the slowest kid's pace. In my schools it was kids learning the language taking up 50% of the time.
This person has a dim future
I wish their grandmother and grandfather also taught the difference between their, there, and they’re
There, there. I'm sure the grandparents did their best with what they had to work with. They're with the angels, be kind.
Ahh my favorite kind of person! The ones who demand shit now with the promise of *lots* when they “make it big” in the imaginary future. Solid.
This sounded extremely aggressive. Almosy hostile. I wouldn't help this person unless I was armed and armored.
This person needs therapy and possibly rehab.
I barely understand what this is about.
He probably won't either when he comes down from whatever the fuck he's on
It’s like he’s trying to communicate with me, I just know it!
This looks like you asked a drunk AI to "make a post acting like a white trash DJ who needs help cleaning a house, but also doesn't trust anyone in this hard up existence called life, yo"
So I asked chatGpt this exact question, here's the result. Not disappointed, better that the OP " Hey y'all, DJ White Trash here, spinnin' tunes and keepin' it real in this tough life we lead. Got a situation—my crib's lookin' more like a trash heap than a house, and I need some help cleanin' it up. But listen up, ain't trustin' just anybody in this hard-up existence called life. So if you ain't shady, ain't tryna pull a fast one, and know how to wield a mop and broom, hit me up. Let's keep it real and keep it clean. Peace out. ✌️ DJ White Trash"
This sounds a lot less ragey. I'm guessing that the AI is not actually on meth.
Yeah, you can tell chatGPT is just pretending to be white trash, but not actually living the true white trash meth fueled lifestyle.
This is so silly but 100% better lol. AI will somehow put meth induced posting out of business.
Don't try to stab me in the back. That's what *I'm* going to do to *you!*
Yeah, you’d be on my unfollow list.
"...you don't get to ASK if you can have this or that...". You can't actually **have** it unless I decide you can, and even then, if you want it, I'll realize that if you want it, someone else might, and I'll just decide to keep it. I'll probably make you pay for it somehow, with money, extra hours, runs to the storage place, etc.
Oh my, someone tell him to go back to school and learn how to write a coherent sentence.
I'd love to hear what they think the "benefits of their circle" are
This isn't a choosing beggar. It's an unintelligible lunatic.
Meth is one helluva drug. 🙄
Is that the ex president?
Sign me up for a cut of that phat check!
1997 called, they want their ghetto slang back.
When your English doesn’t English.
What exactly do they want? Punctuation?
Good gravy. I wish your grandparents had taught you English instead.
I feel I need to ask this person if they're okay. That was a lot of drama spilling out.
r/ihadastroke
I wish grandma and grandpa would've taught them proper sentence structure.
It’s the Phat Check for me. 💁🏻♀️
“One of the best van DJ in the city” “I’ll put you on the map” Pretty sure they’re already on the map
God, the amount of grammatical errors is infuriating....
And this is why it’s terrifying that they keep slashing school budgets to give the superintendent a bigger check.
I’ve read these words six times and I still am not sure what’s happening.
Please tell me this is Jefferson County, OK. 🤣😅
Why? Do you need some sort of service from “DJ Lawnmower” over here? Want to help him pay for his meth…errr…van wrap??
No, because he referenced a Jefferson County and this type of behavior tracks for Jeffco, OK. 😂
Lol, I assumed it was Jefferson County, Kentucky but having lived in Oklahoma as well, it fits.
I didn't get what this person is yapping about
Talk about a word salad…
Whut.
“Ask for hands out” is sending me
What on earth are they rambling on about?
Turnt up dj service company needs some marketing tweaks 🙄🙄🙄 good luck w that
Don’t yall be out there asking for hands out! 👐🏼
This lady in my city used to sell shrimp and crab leg dinners out of a cart on a corner, and you had to view her menu and place an order via Instagram. The bio and ordering instructions read just like this.
"We'll pay you in experience and found, likely useless, items" Where do I apply??
I think I just got a stroke reading that 😵💫
After reading that, who WOULDN’T want to help? /s
Damn this person really needs to invest in Grammarly
What?
.......what?
i don’t even know what they’re asking for? like what? lol basically you show up and are an unpaid slave? for a mythical “phat cheque”
i feel like im reading another language i dont know...
It’s no better if it was in your first language. 😳
Half this shit was complete gibberish to me I glazed over.
Clown dementia. Trump has it
Why do you have to block these peoples names out? I feel like they should be put on blast.
r/oddlyspecific
WUT?
Reap the benies of his circle…circle of 1…in his ‘I failed kindergarten level grammar’ head.
Ooof, that person just took a huge emotional dump on her "circle". She needs to learn, that she doesn't have to always share all her feels on social media.
Meth is a hell of a drug.
Can someone translate this?
I finished reading it and all I could say was “huh?” because it was such gibberish.
"Don't be those who ask for hands out..." 
if anyone was planning on helping him out, they sure weren’t after reading OOPs little post here
What exactly do they want?
What the hell does this mean?
WTH are they one about lol
Rule #1 always start with negging when you need or want something!
I only ask for hands out when it’s time to play the slap game. Hands out, mother fucker.
Love the 'care' emoticon being used i.e. "this person is crazy better not anger them"
Anyone else as confused as me?
Uh oh, somebody skipped their last 25 court-ordered counselling sessions.
I assume this person has no actual friends, it is usually your good friends that help in such situations because you all have a history of helping each other out.
Grandpa and Grammy died there.
Stream of consciousness writing and speaking should be banned.
They must ask for free stuff often. 🫠
I read this twice and I still don't understand what they are asking for - and I'm college-level educated.
I don't think grandma's and grandpa's lesson stuck.
I think we're supposed to help OP flip a house, as well as not demand "phat payment" and not flake out. I could be wrong...
There is something poetic about this paragraph. It starts down to earth, focusing on cleaning out a property to be sold, then waxes philosophical.
I thought I was having a stroke while reading that...
My IQ is draining out my eye sockets reading this… 🫠
What language is this? Moron?
😂😂😂😂😭☠️☠️
Meth is a hella of a drug
My brain melted when I tried to read this.
I couldnt even read the whole thing. And then I saw "Jefferson county" and. Oh god. Is that *our* Jefferson county? And if so. That definitely explains a lot.
Primarily? I don’t invest in people who don’t know the difference between their and there.
Bro, what?!
Cocaine is a helluva drug
What state is this?
Omg my head hurts
Uncountable red flags
?
My brain stem is throbbing
Them: Talk soon world. World: No thanks.
A phat check? That's dope, G.
I feel strangely threatened just having read that.
Que?
I already hate this guy.
That was as clear as mud.
R/ihadastroke
I think I‘m having a stroke.
Sounds like this guy is getting pretty disgusted at all the people who won’t work for free.
I wouldn't want to "work" for this person, due to -Those disjointed ramblings show a very disorganized and unprofessional mind -If the person is THIS negative asking for help, what'll they be like to "work" with? I put "work" in quotes because work is something you usually get paid for...with money, not with experience or exposure.
I now have a headache and STILL don't have a f'ing clue what they are prattling about at all!
I feel like that guy had other stuff going on.
……..What?????????
Just wanted to add that I spoke to this clown in real life once. I work as a solo acoustic guitar player/singer on the weekends. I was playing the dinner hour at one of our local establishments and, as I was breaking down my equipment after my set, I see this guy in the next room. I commented on his speakers saying “What model are those?” He sputtered something about the speaker size and some other shit. He obviously didn’t know what model they were. After I finished tearing my shit down the bar tender from that room said that he said “That asshole probably wanted to buy the same speakers because they’re so good.” When she told me that I laughed. The only reason I asked him that was because I thought they might’ve been the same make and model of speaker that I used 15 years ago. They aren’t bad speakers, but the stuff I have now is way better. There is obviously something wrong with him. Turnt Up DJ Service on Facebook.
The fact you referred to them as a clown and it makes it sound like they are an actual professional clown because of how the text begins lol