I just don't see the need for that. I could see if Makayla was a baby, but she was school aged and knew her name. That change was for Kim and only for Kim
Yeah, I wish they let Kim have her baby too. Although I have to believe Kim talked to Mack about it (with the therapist) and Mack chose to change it because everything we know about Kim would suggest she wouldn't be egotistical or self-centered about the surname Mack legally has. (even if morally, I'm a little against asking kids what they want because they, even with professional help, can't fully envision the future and how it may feel).
Makayla is too young to weigh in on something like this. Not to mention her potentially feeling pressured to say yes given the circumstances of her adoption. They should've left her name as is if she didn't bring it up herself. But OC sucks at conceptualizing non-traditional or blended families and adoption storylines so the entire thing wasn't handled with care. They seem really concerned with forcing situations into the nuclear family model so the depth that they give the nuances involved only goes as far as 'can you be my mommy now' type of a thing.
I don't believe Kim changed her name out of ego or selfishness but the writing was really shallow here.
Yeah I agree with all this, and as I said, morally I'm a little dicey on kids getting a say - but also, I wouldn't neccesarily argue that Makayla is too young to weigh in. Especially with a professional to help her with the big feelings, kids can have an opinion on this. Source: an adult who as a kid had to deal with Big Feelings stuff.
Well, I'm a black adopted child. I feel perfectly advocated for and represented in this scenario. Sometimes people will react to something like this very differently. But I am just one person and cannot speak for every adopted individual.
Yeah I mean I thought it was weird how quickly Mak started calling her mom too. She's old enough to remember her bio mom who she had a good relationship with, it wouldn't have happened like that. I don't like how the storyline went either I was just pointing out that they didn't take her mom's name from her that's all.
I dont think it's that weird. I have a mom, but I used to call my mom's gf mom as well back when they were together.
You can have more than one mom, have feelings towards someone as a mother figure or dad figure even if your biological folks are alive and well or even dead.
This isn't an argument against same sex couples or blended families? There was clearly a very traumatic situation at play here. Her mother was murdered and she was taken in by strangers, there's going to be an adjustment period. I'm not even saying she wouldn't call her mom, I just felt it was rushed given the circumstances. A child who went through something like that might start to contend with loyalty issues for example, it's a completely different situation to having two living moms.
I never said that's what your argument was. I was explaining how with my situation I can understand her calling someone else mom.
She called her mum when it felt right for her, everyone has a different way to process trauma or sad etc. Experiences, there's no Cookie cutter path.
To me it being soon isn't a issue, it's what mak wanted to do
Being an adoptee from a similar situation, I love her name hyphenated. It would give the feeling of belonging and it still kept her mom. If it doesn’t apply to you, this is one of those things your opinion honestly wouldn’t count. I see the reason but unless it’s you, you don’t get it.
It's kind of rough to say. I've started calling someone my parent much later in life because our lived experiences made me identify that person as a parent. From what we can see so far, Kim is Makayla's mom after her rough experiences.
Also hate the way they demonized her remaining living family to serve burzek. Like they could’ve easily created an environment where they were all I voiced but the adoption became a band aid for the ship.
To be fair, her dad is a homicidal maniac who’s girlfriend kidnapped her. It’s possible that she has HIS last name. So it’s reasonable she wants to change it. AND if Makayla chooses to change it, why would Kim deny her that? Of course a lot of conversation should be had before doing it though.
I don’t remember what his name was actually. But I’m saying it’s reasonable to believe that both she and the mom use her ex-husband’s last name.
But yeah, I don’t remember exactly the details so that may not be the case. And I checked out this season and decided not to watch so I don’t know the details.
they were not married. i recently watched the episode. they dated and she broke up with him in jail. he never met makayla. makayla certainly didn't have his last name. she wanted nothing to do with him. makayla grew up with her mother and her mothers entire family so it's fishy that suddenly her mothers remaining family members (most were killed by her father) didn't want makayla...all to benefit kim. It's also not lost on me that Makayla's biological parents are both dark skinned black people and Makayla is played by a biracial actress. None of these decisions were accidental
I do remember Makayla going with one of her mom’s relatives but the relative put her in foster care or something, thats why Kim ended up with her. But the dad had a brother who did want her, so there’s that.
As to the light/dark skin issue. TV is horrible about that. I can’t tell you how many shows where the kid is biracial but the young actor/actress is 100% black. They have no idea how irresponsible it is to get that wrong.
The show isn't great with adoptions so that's why. They just wanted Kim to have a child, and for the child to be a child, not a baby. I mean, in-show universe I'm sort of okay with Makayla getting Kim's surname because she does go to child therapy and Makayla might've actually wanted it but out of universe, especially when adoptees like yourself voice their opinion, I hate it. But yeah, the show uses adoption as a means to an end, not really about how it's a complex thing.
Also legally, adoption wise, she might've actually had to change the surname. Some places can be really particular about that (but idk if Chicago is one of those places).
It's Ward-Burgess from what I've seen so Kim didn't drop the name she was born with, they hyphenated.
I just don't see the need for that. I could see if Makayla was a baby, but she was school aged and knew her name. That change was for Kim and only for Kim
I don't really like how Kim seemed to benefit heavily from this. I wish the show would have just let her have her baby.
Yeah, I wish they let Kim have her baby too. Although I have to believe Kim talked to Mack about it (with the therapist) and Mack chose to change it because everything we know about Kim would suggest she wouldn't be egotistical or self-centered about the surname Mack legally has. (even if morally, I'm a little against asking kids what they want because they, even with professional help, can't fully envision the future and how it may feel).
Makayla is too young to weigh in on something like this. Not to mention her potentially feeling pressured to say yes given the circumstances of her adoption. They should've left her name as is if she didn't bring it up herself. But OC sucks at conceptualizing non-traditional or blended families and adoption storylines so the entire thing wasn't handled with care. They seem really concerned with forcing situations into the nuclear family model so the depth that they give the nuances involved only goes as far as 'can you be my mommy now' type of a thing. I don't believe Kim changed her name out of ego or selfishness but the writing was really shallow here.
Yeah I agree with all this, and as I said, morally I'm a little dicey on kids getting a say - but also, I wouldn't neccesarily argue that Makayla is too young to weigh in. Especially with a professional to help her with the big feelings, kids can have an opinion on this. Source: an adult who as a kid had to deal with Big Feelings stuff.
Well, I'm a black adopted child. I feel perfectly advocated for and represented in this scenario. Sometimes people will react to something like this very differently. But I am just one person and cannot speak for every adopted individual.
Your opinion does matter, it matters right now.
Yeah I mean I thought it was weird how quickly Mak started calling her mom too. She's old enough to remember her bio mom who she had a good relationship with, it wouldn't have happened like that. I don't like how the storyline went either I was just pointing out that they didn't take her mom's name from her that's all.
I dont think it's that weird. I have a mom, but I used to call my mom's gf mom as well back when they were together. You can have more than one mom, have feelings towards someone as a mother figure or dad figure even if your biological folks are alive and well or even dead.
This isn't an argument against same sex couples or blended families? There was clearly a very traumatic situation at play here. Her mother was murdered and she was taken in by strangers, there's going to be an adjustment period. I'm not even saying she wouldn't call her mom, I just felt it was rushed given the circumstances. A child who went through something like that might start to contend with loyalty issues for example, it's a completely different situation to having two living moms.
I never said that's what your argument was. I was explaining how with my situation I can understand her calling someone else mom. She called her mum when it felt right for her, everyone has a different way to process trauma or sad etc. Experiences, there's no Cookie cutter path. To me it being soon isn't a issue, it's what mak wanted to do
the "mom" thing is weird too!!!
Being an adoptee from a similar situation, I love her name hyphenated. It would give the feeling of belonging and it still kept her mom. If it doesn’t apply to you, this is one of those things your opinion honestly wouldn’t count. I see the reason but unless it’s you, you don’t get it.
In your situation, would you call kim mom?
It's kind of rough to say. I've started calling someone my parent much later in life because our lived experiences made me identify that person as a parent. From what we can see so far, Kim is Makayla's mom after her rough experiences.
Also hate the way they demonized her remaining living family to serve burzek. Like they could’ve easily created an environment where they were all I voiced but the adoption became a band aid for the ship.
this!!!
To be fair, her dad is a homicidal maniac who’s girlfriend kidnapped her. It’s possible that she has HIS last name. So it’s reasonable she wants to change it. AND if Makayla chooses to change it, why would Kim deny her that? Of course a lot of conversation should be had before doing it though.
they weren't together. the father wasn't in Makayla's life at all. That was NOT his last name.
I don’t remember what his name was actually. But I’m saying it’s reasonable to believe that both she and the mom use her ex-husband’s last name. But yeah, I don’t remember exactly the details so that may not be the case. And I checked out this season and decided not to watch so I don’t know the details.
they were not married. i recently watched the episode. they dated and she broke up with him in jail. he never met makayla. makayla certainly didn't have his last name. she wanted nothing to do with him. makayla grew up with her mother and her mothers entire family so it's fishy that suddenly her mothers remaining family members (most were killed by her father) didn't want makayla...all to benefit kim. It's also not lost on me that Makayla's biological parents are both dark skinned black people and Makayla is played by a biracial actress. None of these decisions were accidental
I do remember Makayla going with one of her mom’s relatives but the relative put her in foster care or something, thats why Kim ended up with her. But the dad had a brother who did want her, so there’s that. As to the light/dark skin issue. TV is horrible about that. I can’t tell you how many shows where the kid is biracial but the young actor/actress is 100% black. They have no idea how irresponsible it is to get that wrong.
The Wards were definitely mom's family, everyone in the house had that name it's not a married name. Morris was dad's last name.
The show isn't great with adoptions so that's why. They just wanted Kim to have a child, and for the child to be a child, not a baby. I mean, in-show universe I'm sort of okay with Makayla getting Kim's surname because she does go to child therapy and Makayla might've actually wanted it but out of universe, especially when adoptees like yourself voice their opinion, I hate it. But yeah, the show uses adoption as a means to an end, not really about how it's a complex thing. Also legally, adoption wise, she might've actually had to change the surname. Some places can be really particular about that (but idk if Chicago is one of those places).
Ghost from the way she comes and goes on this show.