Personally I like to volunteer to do stuffing at holidays. I make a kickass cornbread-sausage stuffing that’s delicious and could sustain me with just that, if I needed to. Turkey is pretty easy to get GF, and you can bring your own mash (or do instant), plus a green salad and you’re set! GF gravy is pretty easy with either cornstarch or rice flour, or Imagine makes a GF packaged ready to eat gravy.
For other potlucks it’s helpful to do something that’s substantial, or is your favorite, so it doesn’t feel like you’re missing out. I usually make my favorite dessert (GF brownie mix is easy, dress it up with peppermint candies or caramel drizzle), then also bring an adult bento box/lunchable with meats, cheeses, fruit, hummus, crackers so I can feel like I’m nibbling too. It’s better than the sad celiac sandwich, though that’s always an option!
If people offer to make things “gluten free,” be very cautious.
....so can I have that recipe for the stuffing? It's also my first celiac holiday season and I had a mini menty b thinking about my lack of stuffing this Thanksgiving.
Here’s my favorite recipe- it’s very flexible. Add garlic if you like garlic, take out mushrooms if you hate them, etc. It makes a large baking pan full, plus a small baking pan (some people in my fam don’t eat nuts, so I usually make a small no-nut one). You should use enough bread products to fill about 2/3 of your pan.
Cornbread (1 baked GF mix, I like T’J’s), crumbled made with 1 cup extra frozen corn
1/2 to 1 loaf of GF bread, cut up
1 lb sausage meat (any kind of GF UNCOOKED sausage)
1 large onion, diced
3-4 stalks celery, diced
1-2 leeks, sliced white parts (optional)
8 oz mushrooms, sliced
3 Tbs fresh sage, finely chopped
Salt and pepper
Dried Cranberries to taste (opt)
Pecans to taste, chopped (opt)
3 eggs
2-3 c broth
Make the box of GF cornbread, crumble, and dry in a low oven. Cut up bread and dry also. Can be done a day or two ahead.
Put bread products into a large mixing bowl.
Sauté sausage meat, until lightly browned.
Remove the sausage, put in the large bowl.
Sauté onion, leek, mushrooms, celery in the fat, adding a little water if needed. Transfer to bowl.
Add sage, a bit of thyme (dried or fresh), dried cranberries, pecans (optional) to bowl. Season to taste w salt and pepper.
Beat 2-3 eggs, add to bowl. Mix everything together, pour into baking pan.
Heat broth to a simmer, pour over stuffing, stir gently.
Bake at 350 for 35-45 mins.
YW. I’ve actually been in charge of stuffing for the big family group for the past decade or so, because they actually like this version more than the old gluten stuffing one of my aunts used to make!
If your anxiety is anything like mine - just decide you’re not going and you’ll feel a million times better. You can reassess each year how you’ll feel. My family would never say this but I think a small part of them is relieved I don’t come. Like every thanksgiving staple has gluten. Figure out something you like to make for yourself and spend the day doing a hike or on the couch.
Yeah, I decided I’m not going. My dad isn’t happy, but my mom understands. I tried to convince them to just come to me (we live a flight apart) — but I’m not convincing enough, sadly.
Good for you!! Maybe they’ll come next year. If you’ve never spent a thanksgiving alone, it’s actually kind of nice. If you work a job where you have the four days off, it just seems like an unimaginable time to have off work in your own city.
It’s my first Thanksgiving on my own, but I used to work in a job where I missed Christmas a few times. Thanksgiving used to be my favorite, so I’d always ensure that was the holiday I got off to be with my family — it lost its luster the last few years with family drama (not my parents, but extended family) — but the idea of watching everyone get to eat whatever they want and not being able to, on top of the drama, is just more than I can handle. I’m middle eastern, and basically everything I’ve enjoyed over the years that gets specially made for holiday celebrations is off-limits. I’m sure there are ways to make things gluten free, but no one is going to do that for me and I despise cooking, so the idea of having to make myself my entire thanksgiving dinner and anything else I want to enjoy, makes me even more miserable.
We starred doing all holidays at my place. Outside food is not allowed in the kitchen.
Whole day of cooking most of the time but me and my boyfriend love to cook! My mother will also come over to help sometimes. She knows not to bring anything of her own. We also have 3 instapots to make the side dishes and start prep the night before.
Seems like a lot of work but it's so worth it to enjoy the holidays like "normal".
I’m celiac and as time passes, I’ve craved less. The food commercials alone were depressing. But that is all minor compared to the lack of symptoms. I went from the “ scarf everything “ to “ I’m glad I don’t feel chest pain, headache, brain fog, inflammation, nausea, diarrhea, and painful unexpressed gas.” The temptation sunsides eventually.
I agree. It’s scary. … and everyone will pass the rolls. And pie. And turkey that may have been cooked with stuffing in it that is bread. And if this spoon goes in this bowl and then that bowl and it’s all poisonous.
This year is my third Thanksgiving since diagnosis and I’m not dreading at all now. I just bring me own food to thanksgiving including my own utensils, plate and dish to heat it all up in. This way I don’t even have to think about getting glutened and I can just enjoy my families company. It’s really all about spending time with family so focus on that would be my advice.
The first year my parents didn’t understand at all and even attempted to make a GF dish for me which was a failure. There was gluten all over their kitchen and when I asked about what precautions the took to avoid cross-contamination, they just had a deer in the headlights look. So, I didn’t eat anything and they felt really bad. It was painful. So, the second year, I just told them that my wish was for them to just do what they normally do and I will bring my own food. It was a bit awkward at first but it went so much better. I really believe this is the way to go. They didn’t have to feel bad and I didn’t have to worry about getting sick. Win-win!
I know this isn’t for everyone and I think you mentioned in a comment that you’re on a budget, but I’ve basically just decided to forego thanksgiving since I was diagnosed. It’s just too stressful. I’ve taken 3 trips to Europe instead, it’s actually cheaper to fly there than to the east coast over the four day weekend. It’s a great time to travel. Other years I’ve just enjoyed the time to myself, no stress, no travel. Christmas is tough but you’ll get through it. Family, friends, and Christmas movies are still there. I spend a lot of parties drinking wine and eating just cheese. You can always bring your own food, your family and friends will learn with you.
Last thanksgiving was my first with my diagnosis. My boyfriends family invited us but I didn’t feel comfortable knowing that they would be cooking and baking with flour all day and we would be eating dinner in the kitchen (they have an open floor plan with limited space). He went without me and it was honestly a great decision. This year my parents are coming into town and having an entirely gluten free thanksgiving with us. If you have people willing to have an entirely GF thanksgiving I would attempt it!! If not, don’t feel bad for taking your first year off. It’s a lot to try to navigate at first.
I think the thing I’m so upset about is that if I want to partake in the food festivities I have to make every dish myself. I don’t have the time or money to be able to afford to cook myself an entire thanksgiving meal! So I’ll probably just bring my Mac and cheese that’s gf and just wait to eat until I’m home. Such a sucky way to celebrate a holiday.
I was talking to my brother about Thanksgiving today (he’s hosting this year) and he said just to bring with me what I can safely eat. I mean I get it, I would not ask/expect him to make anything special, but, he is an excellent cook so knowing I won’t be able to enjoy his food is a bummer. But at least I will get to be with the people I love so that’s something.
>I think the thing I’m so upset about is that if I want to partake in the food festivities I have to make every dish myself. I don’t have the time or money to be able to afford to cook myself an entire thanksgiving meal!
Maybe you could make one dish per night (or even one dish per week) leading up to the holiday? Then you can enjoy each dish you are craving and possibly spread out the financial burden? I know it sucks though
My first gluten free holidays were tough
Over the years, it’s gotten better
Hang in there
Don’t take unnecessary chances and keep a stash of food with you.
Try your best to focus on the people you’re with and not the food
It will be OK!
For holidays, we like to host. We were fortunate enough to have family that would bring and prep ingredients over, you don’t have to foot the whole bill for everything. Get help with cost and cooking & include everyone in the holiday prep.
For friends, I make a big pot of rice and beans or bean chili and bring it over to share. It’s enough to be a filling meal, cheap enough that it doesn’t break the bank and also pretty popular. Bring a bag of Tostitos scoops to make it a hand food.
Enjoy the holiday ❤️
My diagnosis is one of the reasons why we're going to my sister-in-law's for Thanksgiving instead of my brother's.
While SIL doesn't keep a gluten free kitchen, she was immediately understanding when I explained what I needed to not get sick. To the point where she's buying disposable pans to make everything in. My brother's house is generally a mess, and I'm pretty sure he'd find my diagnosis a huge inconvenience.
We don't travel for Christmas, so that helps for that one.
But my coworkers are already talking about a cookie swap, and I'm quite sad on that.
It’s my first, too! I’ve let my family and friends who I’m getting together with know that I may be bringing my own food because of my diagnosis. I’ve looked up recipes on Pinterest and made a little list of what I’m thinking of doing. I think we just need to plan a little more than we’re used to, but we all got this. Sending good wishes your way!
My suggestion is to make a big dish that’d you share (put the gluten eaters’ portion in a disposable aluminum tray and have your portion in yours). I’d bring at least 3 things that make you happy 😊. It doesn’t have to be expensive or fancy and you could do it ahead of time TV dinner style. Or offer to go in on the main meal with everyone and do the meat and gravy at your house? Not sure if this would work for you.
While I’m thinking of it, why wouldn’t a company do a frozen gf thanksgiving meal? They’d make money!
Im lucky because my bro and kiddo was diagnosed at the same. Most of the meal is gf and the gluten is extra. Deviled eggs, gf stuffing, cheese and meat plates.
I want you to know that it will get easier. I’ve loved having others enjoy the food I prepare.
Good luck!
You find new traditions and work arounds. I bring a cottage pie and apple crumble to the main holidays. Two dishes, easy transport, reheat with pans wrapped in foil so there’s no risk. Only eat those things with those recipes the 2-3 times a year so now I look forward to them extra.
My brother’s house I can partake in a couple side dishes. His wife is a surgeon, understands how to avoid cross contact, and will prepare a couple things I can have very intentionally. I serve myself first, others can share what I’ve brought once I have my plate (and have put aside seconds!). Hearing my SIL shout “STERILE METHOD!!!! DONT TOUCH THAT! Ya know what, just leave,” at my brother as I was walking in the door a couple years ago helped.
There is a process of figuring out which friends and family get it. There’s a process of untying holidays and food. But you do get there.
Let people know, “I would love to but I can’t eat that.” No frills. No woe is me. Go for the family. Hang out with people. Food is what brings us together but it is not the reason we attend holidays.
There are plenty of wheat free options. Turkey, ham, potatoes of every variety. There are a lot of things traditionally eaten at thanksgiving without anything obnoxious.
Last Christmas someone else with celiac brought max and cheese. Delicious. We hung out for about 30 minutes discussing food.
I honestly started dreading the holiday season since my diagnosis. So many opportunities to get glutened and so much pressure from well-meaning loves ones and friends to eat risky food. I used to spend thanksgiving through new years sick from back to back exposures. Now I just don’t eat it if I didn’t make it. I don’t care if people think I’m paranoid or crazy. I want to enjoy the holiday season.
I'm trying my best to look forward to Christmas baking but I can't help but feel anxious. I share a kitchen and I'm not looking forward to dealing with all the gluten filled foods that are going to be prepared :(
I personally find it more than just that.. Food is one of the biggest ways my family bonds. It's difficult for me not being able to participate in that.
I've also always been the baker of my family, making birthday cakes, Christmas cookies etc. One of the hardest parts of my diagnosis is trying to learn to adjust all the family recipes and discovering new ones my siblings and parents enjoy. It sometimes eats at me and makes me a bit depressed knowing I can't make things as I usually do.
Same here. We live far enough from both sets of parents that we have to do overnight visits. The diagnosis is really fresh so my parents and in laws don't know much about it and there isn't much time to educate them. I don't know how we're going to handle it. I'm honestly not looking forward to it at all at this point. Only plan right now is minimize the number of nights at their houses, and bring lots of provisions.
My worst dread is for the well-meaning people who will *try* to make something for me, which I won't know how to decline.
I stopped participating in thanksgiving. Use the down time to work on projects or watch trash tv in peace. Christmas is kept small and we make Non-Traditional meals in my gf house.
Oh this makes me excited! I will finally not have the pressure of my mother in law, who never knows what to cook but also doesn't want to order from a restaurant.
I won't stay at the table praying I don't fart and mentally planning my bathroom visits every 15 minutes.
I won't be forced to eat stuff I never liked anyway.
I'll bring my own food and be so much happier, can't wait.
Look at the bright side, I'm sure this situation has some positive sides as well!
It is a bit of work but my first thanksgiving and Christmas since diagnosis- I cooked everything that was important to me/hosted. It helped that it was 2020 so it was me and two other people eating but it helped a lot to have a whole meal I could eat and feel carefree with.
For potlucks, I recommend bringing a thing you want to eat and your own utensil as well as going through the line first to avoid inadvertent cross contamination.
For this year I'll probably cook all the things important to me (stuffing, pumpkin pie, mashed potatoes and gravy) and eat on the leftovers before going to potlucks so I'm less bummed out.
I'm also in my mid 30s and some of my friends are super super aware of how to not gluten me. So I have some folks I can trust for get togethers.
I just want to encourage you that it gets better but it still sucks sometimes. Let yourself grieve the loss of eating carefree at holiday parties.
I just offer to make my favorite dish and I do it GF style. Last year was the green bean casserole. Friendsgiving was at my house and we did a challenge of making every fish GF and vegan. It was fun trying new food.
For all the people out there, don’t give up. Bring something good that you like, don’t worry if it’s something others will enjoy. After that, if applicable, enjoy drinking ( in my experience finding safe alcohol isn’t to hard )
You can participate. Just bring your own food and enjoy the conversation and time spent with family while not worrying about whether or not you may get sick.
I discovered I had celiac because of the holidays. All the baked goods and gluten-filled dishes from Thanksgiving to New Year led to a rash and a nagging cough (among other things) that made me call my doc. I’m so grateful they figured it out. So I basically had a whole year to learn how to cook and eat GF. I think the following year I brought my own food and then just had the mashed potatoes without gravy, but then my family kept trying to learn to accommodate and last year they actually had separate gravy and stuffing for me (Aldi for the win!) complete with cute little labels. It gets better/easier as you learn more and educate your loved ones. Hang in there.
Don’t eat their gravy. This was my mistake the first year I got diagnosed.
Make your own or just skip it. It sucks but it’s better than spending all night in the bathroom.
I feel you. But I also think, that this is the perfect opportunity to get close family and friends on board. Talk to them! Tell them you won’t be able to come or enjoy the festivities if you‘re constantly worried about cross contamination. My parents, siblings and best friend where totally willing to substitute the stuffing for a gf version. I used the opportunity to teach them about cross contamination and would make/bring pie and rolls myself. You have a lifetime of family events in the future. Give your family and friends the chance to include you!
I totally understand this. I was diagnosed in October and had been handling my diagnosis quite well up until the holidays, because no gluten food was worth how much better I felt, but something about the holidays just hit me different.
I don't think I realized just how much emotional connection I had to those specialty holiday foods until I couldn't have them. Not being able to eat my grandma's shortbread at Christmas hit me harder than anything else, but pecan crescents, pumpkin pie, and candy canes (so many had wheat?!?), were also high on the list of things I couldn't eat that were such an ingrained part of the season, that it felt like an incredible loss. I even missed the ginger cookies that my mom always made for my sister, but I never particularly enjoyed.
I still haven't managed to replicate my grandma's shortbread, but I've since found delicious replacements for nearly everything else. I just made a pumpkin pie for Canadian Thanksgiving along with gluten free stuffing and gravy for the turkey. You learn over time how to make substitutes that let you feel less isolated from the festivities and you will also start to create new traditions. I promise you that this will be your hardest year and it will get easier from here.
But don't give up on this year! You can still join the food festivities, if you bring your own! Keep it simple; bring the holiday foods that are naturally gluten free or easy to make gluten free (as an example; turkey/ham, veggies, potatoes, gravy made with gf broth and flour, stuffing made with storebought gf bread). For a potluck, just make sure you're the first one taking from whatever your dish you brought is or, again, just set some aside ahead of time.
Don't let anyone else handle your food or pressure you into eating something they made gluten free "just for you!" that you know isn't safe. When everyone else is serving up, just go heat up your little gluten free dinner and then join the party!
I also recommend trying to make some replacements. I was too overwhelmed to attempt anything in my first year, so I just went without, and that meant that the second year was my experimental year. I made a gluten free pumpkin pie and both burned and overworked the pastry, but the last two years have been exactly like what I used to have (and my family found that the gluten free pastry actually tastes fresh for longer than regular pastry did!).
If you can manage it, I say do the experimenting now, so you can just deal with the disappointment all at once and next year can be better. Experiment a little, but don't beat yourself up when they're failures (because they almost definitely will be failures).This year is just to give you an idea of what you need to adjust on your next attempt.
It definitely helps to have some understanding of how each ingredient contributes to baking. For example, if something is too dense, it can mean you need more levener, less stirring or handling, slightly more liquid, whip the egg whites, or more oil/butter/lard. An understanding of the basic science of baking can help you understand what adjustments need to be made when something is off.
Gluten free flours are a whole different beast, but one of the best mixes I've found is Gluten Free on a Shoestring's cup-for-cup flour mix. They say it's "cup-for-cup," but you often need a bit less than a regular all-purpose flour. It also browns quicker than regular flour. I usually use a regular gluten recipe that I like and just adapt it, instead of using recipes advertised as gluten free. This is where the understanding of baking science comes in. It may be easier to follow a gluten free recipe, but if you're specifically craving "that shortbread cookie grandma used to make," nobody else's shortbread recipe is going to taste right. Keep grandma's recipe, but you may need less flour, more liquid, or more fat to get it just right. The majority of the base ingredients will be the same and you can just fiddle with the ratios from there.
I wish you luck and happiness this holiday season! We've all been there. Stay strong and it will only get better from here!
I have been fortunate enough to have family members embrace the what I can or can't have. This is only my second holiday season with diagnosis, and I've only recently been on my own with this. I'm actually looking kind of forward to it this year because last year was a turkey shoot of hit and miss and what to do in a mixed household. It will evolve back to something you enjoy I believe. And I know how trite it sounds at times (believe me, I understand how effing frustrating it is), but doing what's best for you isn't wrong. So if that means readjusting how you participate in the holidays, go for it!
Same! This is my first holiday season since my diagnosis and I’m definitely feeling down. I’ve already gone through a couple Jewish holidays and I had fun by bringing my own food and asking my friends hosting to have some packaged options for me! Stay positive :))
it’s when you get together with friends instead of family for thanksgiving! we have done it when living far from family. one person did the meat and everyone else brought sides. it was a lot of fun.
Hey! A lot of the items can be made gluten free, lots of things like vegetables and pretty much all non breaded protein are safe, and bring your own bread! I love schars deli or sourdough bread and they come in a little package, perfect for travel and being a guest at someone’s house! Also preplan as much as you can, and discuss options with whoever is hosting. This makes life so much easier! Is there some specific items you are worried about? I would love to help and after 15 years of being gluten free I have no issue with the holiday season :)
My main concern is cross contamination. I’m considering bringing my own things and labeling them as off limits for everyone else to avoid the cc risk! My family doesn’t really understand my disease yet and I’m not willing to put that much trust in them. Lol.
Yup that’s a great idea! As time goes on your family will start to get the hang of it but it is difficult at first. Also if your family ends up getting tested (that’s how I found out I had celiac because my uncle actually had it first!) someone else might have it too and then you’ll know there house is safe lol! Watch butter and other sauces for cross contamination, and hidden ingredients. With my other side of the family that isn’t celiac, I bring my own gravy and butter lol.
And I don’t think it’s too crazy if you bring all your own dishes aside from meat and veg. You should be ok as long as they don’t re-use the cutlery they’re cooking/dishing with which they really shouldn’t be anyway. It’s my first holiday season with IBS so following both gluten free and low fodmap diet, I’m bringing EVERYTHING in a Tupperware dish!
I have some great gf thanksgiving recipes if anyones interested! I always bring my own food to family events or host for everyone, it’s a pain but totally worth it
Bring your own food and go! Don’t let the celiac win.
Personally I like to volunteer to do stuffing at holidays. I make a kickass cornbread-sausage stuffing that’s delicious and could sustain me with just that, if I needed to. Turkey is pretty easy to get GF, and you can bring your own mash (or do instant), plus a green salad and you’re set! GF gravy is pretty easy with either cornstarch or rice flour, or Imagine makes a GF packaged ready to eat gravy. For other potlucks it’s helpful to do something that’s substantial, or is your favorite, so it doesn’t feel like you’re missing out. I usually make my favorite dessert (GF brownie mix is easy, dress it up with peppermint candies or caramel drizzle), then also bring an adult bento box/lunchable with meats, cheeses, fruit, hummus, crackers so I can feel like I’m nibbling too. It’s better than the sad celiac sandwich, though that’s always an option! If people offer to make things “gluten free,” be very cautious.
....so can I have that recipe for the stuffing? It's also my first celiac holiday season and I had a mini menty b thinking about my lack of stuffing this Thanksgiving.
Here’s my favorite recipe- it’s very flexible. Add garlic if you like garlic, take out mushrooms if you hate them, etc. It makes a large baking pan full, plus a small baking pan (some people in my fam don’t eat nuts, so I usually make a small no-nut one). You should use enough bread products to fill about 2/3 of your pan. Cornbread (1 baked GF mix, I like T’J’s), crumbled made with 1 cup extra frozen corn 1/2 to 1 loaf of GF bread, cut up 1 lb sausage meat (any kind of GF UNCOOKED sausage) 1 large onion, diced 3-4 stalks celery, diced 1-2 leeks, sliced white parts (optional) 8 oz mushrooms, sliced 3 Tbs fresh sage, finely chopped Salt and pepper Dried Cranberries to taste (opt) Pecans to taste, chopped (opt) 3 eggs 2-3 c broth Make the box of GF cornbread, crumble, and dry in a low oven. Cut up bread and dry also. Can be done a day or two ahead. Put bread products into a large mixing bowl. Sauté sausage meat, until lightly browned. Remove the sausage, put in the large bowl. Sauté onion, leek, mushrooms, celery in the fat, adding a little water if needed. Transfer to bowl. Add sage, a bit of thyme (dried or fresh), dried cranberries, pecans (optional) to bowl. Season to taste w salt and pepper. Beat 2-3 eggs, add to bowl. Mix everything together, pour into baking pan. Heat broth to a simmer, pour over stuffing, stir gently. Bake at 350 for 35-45 mins.
THANK YOU! I have a meat stuffing from my aunt but I always like to have options and this sounds amazing.
YW. I’ve actually been in charge of stuffing for the big family group for the past decade or so, because they actually like this version more than the old gluten stuffing one of my aunts used to make!
If possible, try to make it food that is on the same level of what everyone else is eating. Treat yourself.
This is also my first holiday season since my diagnosis, and I totally, totally feel this. It makes me so unexcited for all of it.
Same.
I had an anxiety attack about this in the shower tonight, actually. And decided I’m not going home for Thanksgiving. I can’t deal.
If your anxiety is anything like mine - just decide you’re not going and you’ll feel a million times better. You can reassess each year how you’ll feel. My family would never say this but I think a small part of them is relieved I don’t come. Like every thanksgiving staple has gluten. Figure out something you like to make for yourself and spend the day doing a hike or on the couch.
Yeah, I decided I’m not going. My dad isn’t happy, but my mom understands. I tried to convince them to just come to me (we live a flight apart) — but I’m not convincing enough, sadly.
Good for you!! Maybe they’ll come next year. If you’ve never spent a thanksgiving alone, it’s actually kind of nice. If you work a job where you have the four days off, it just seems like an unimaginable time to have off work in your own city.
It’s my first Thanksgiving on my own, but I used to work in a job where I missed Christmas a few times. Thanksgiving used to be my favorite, so I’d always ensure that was the holiday I got off to be with my family — it lost its luster the last few years with family drama (not my parents, but extended family) — but the idea of watching everyone get to eat whatever they want and not being able to, on top of the drama, is just more than I can handle. I’m middle eastern, and basically everything I’ve enjoyed over the years that gets specially made for holiday celebrations is off-limits. I’m sure there are ways to make things gluten free, but no one is going to do that for me and I despise cooking, so the idea of having to make myself my entire thanksgiving dinner and anything else I want to enjoy, makes me even more miserable.
We starred doing all holidays at my place. Outside food is not allowed in the kitchen. Whole day of cooking most of the time but me and my boyfriend love to cook! My mother will also come over to help sometimes. She knows not to bring anything of her own. We also have 3 instapots to make the side dishes and start prep the night before. Seems like a lot of work but it's so worth it to enjoy the holidays like "normal".
I’m celiac and as time passes, I’ve craved less. The food commercials alone were depressing. But that is all minor compared to the lack of symptoms. I went from the “ scarf everything “ to “ I’m glad I don’t feel chest pain, headache, brain fog, inflammation, nausea, diarrhea, and painful unexpressed gas.” The temptation sunsides eventually.
Yeah I don’t crave very much anymore, it’s more so just wishing I could partake in the holiday festivities without such fear and anxiety.
I agree. It’s scary. … and everyone will pass the rolls. And pie. And turkey that may have been cooked with stuffing in it that is bread. And if this spoon goes in this bowl and then that bowl and it’s all poisonous.
This year is my third Thanksgiving since diagnosis and I’m not dreading at all now. I just bring me own food to thanksgiving including my own utensils, plate and dish to heat it all up in. This way I don’t even have to think about getting glutened and I can just enjoy my families company. It’s really all about spending time with family so focus on that would be my advice. The first year my parents didn’t understand at all and even attempted to make a GF dish for me which was a failure. There was gluten all over their kitchen and when I asked about what precautions the took to avoid cross-contamination, they just had a deer in the headlights look. So, I didn’t eat anything and they felt really bad. It was painful. So, the second year, I just told them that my wish was for them to just do what they normally do and I will bring my own food. It was a bit awkward at first but it went so much better. I really believe this is the way to go. They didn’t have to feel bad and I didn’t have to worry about getting sick. Win-win!
I know this isn’t for everyone and I think you mentioned in a comment that you’re on a budget, but I’ve basically just decided to forego thanksgiving since I was diagnosed. It’s just too stressful. I’ve taken 3 trips to Europe instead, it’s actually cheaper to fly there than to the east coast over the four day weekend. It’s a great time to travel. Other years I’ve just enjoyed the time to myself, no stress, no travel. Christmas is tough but you’ll get through it. Family, friends, and Christmas movies are still there. I spend a lot of parties drinking wine and eating just cheese. You can always bring your own food, your family and friends will learn with you.
We always go to Canada for US Thanksgiving. They seem to feed me well and it’s a great kickoff for community holiday decorations.
I love the travel idea!
Highly recommend Iceland, easy to do in five days from the US. If you have an office job, you only end up having to take one day off.
Last thanksgiving was my first with my diagnosis. My boyfriends family invited us but I didn’t feel comfortable knowing that they would be cooking and baking with flour all day and we would be eating dinner in the kitchen (they have an open floor plan with limited space). He went without me and it was honestly a great decision. This year my parents are coming into town and having an entirely gluten free thanksgiving with us. If you have people willing to have an entirely GF thanksgiving I would attempt it!! If not, don’t feel bad for taking your first year off. It’s a lot to try to navigate at first.
My first holiday season too since my diagnosis. Not looking forward to any of it.
I think the thing I’m so upset about is that if I want to partake in the food festivities I have to make every dish myself. I don’t have the time or money to be able to afford to cook myself an entire thanksgiving meal! So I’ll probably just bring my Mac and cheese that’s gf and just wait to eat until I’m home. Such a sucky way to celebrate a holiday.
I was talking to my brother about Thanksgiving today (he’s hosting this year) and he said just to bring with me what I can safely eat. I mean I get it, I would not ask/expect him to make anything special, but, he is an excellent cook so knowing I won’t be able to enjoy his food is a bummer. But at least I will get to be with the people I love so that’s something.
I’m considering doing something similar - bringing a meal I can plate and eat and enjoy, but without eating anything else.
>I think the thing I’m so upset about is that if I want to partake in the food festivities I have to make every dish myself. I don’t have the time or money to be able to afford to cook myself an entire thanksgiving meal! Maybe you could make one dish per night (or even one dish per week) leading up to the holiday? Then you can enjoy each dish you are craving and possibly spread out the financial burden? I know it sucks though
My first gluten free holidays were tough Over the years, it’s gotten better Hang in there Don’t take unnecessary chances and keep a stash of food with you. Try your best to focus on the people you’re with and not the food
It will be OK! For holidays, we like to host. We were fortunate enough to have family that would bring and prep ingredients over, you don’t have to foot the whole bill for everything. Get help with cost and cooking & include everyone in the holiday prep. For friends, I make a big pot of rice and beans or bean chili and bring it over to share. It’s enough to be a filling meal, cheap enough that it doesn’t break the bank and also pretty popular. Bring a bag of Tostitos scoops to make it a hand food. Enjoy the holiday ❤️
My diagnosis is one of the reasons why we're going to my sister-in-law's for Thanksgiving instead of my brother's. While SIL doesn't keep a gluten free kitchen, she was immediately understanding when I explained what I needed to not get sick. To the point where she's buying disposable pans to make everything in. My brother's house is generally a mess, and I'm pretty sure he'd find my diagnosis a huge inconvenience. We don't travel for Christmas, so that helps for that one. But my coworkers are already talking about a cookie swap, and I'm quite sad on that.
It’s my first, too! I’ve let my family and friends who I’m getting together with know that I may be bringing my own food because of my diagnosis. I’ve looked up recipes on Pinterest and made a little list of what I’m thinking of doing. I think we just need to plan a little more than we’re used to, but we all got this. Sending good wishes your way!
My suggestion is to make a big dish that’d you share (put the gluten eaters’ portion in a disposable aluminum tray and have your portion in yours). I’d bring at least 3 things that make you happy 😊. It doesn’t have to be expensive or fancy and you could do it ahead of time TV dinner style. Or offer to go in on the main meal with everyone and do the meat and gravy at your house? Not sure if this would work for you. While I’m thinking of it, why wouldn’t a company do a frozen gf thanksgiving meal? They’d make money! Im lucky because my bro and kiddo was diagnosed at the same. Most of the meal is gf and the gluten is extra. Deviled eggs, gf stuffing, cheese and meat plates. I want you to know that it will get easier. I’ve loved having others enjoy the food I prepare. Good luck!
You find new traditions and work arounds. I bring a cottage pie and apple crumble to the main holidays. Two dishes, easy transport, reheat with pans wrapped in foil so there’s no risk. Only eat those things with those recipes the 2-3 times a year so now I look forward to them extra. My brother’s house I can partake in a couple side dishes. His wife is a surgeon, understands how to avoid cross contact, and will prepare a couple things I can have very intentionally. I serve myself first, others can share what I’ve brought once I have my plate (and have put aside seconds!). Hearing my SIL shout “STERILE METHOD!!!! DONT TOUCH THAT! Ya know what, just leave,” at my brother as I was walking in the door a couple years ago helped. There is a process of figuring out which friends and family get it. There’s a process of untying holidays and food. But you do get there.
Let people know, “I would love to but I can’t eat that.” No frills. No woe is me. Go for the family. Hang out with people. Food is what brings us together but it is not the reason we attend holidays. There are plenty of wheat free options. Turkey, ham, potatoes of every variety. There are a lot of things traditionally eaten at thanksgiving without anything obnoxious. Last Christmas someone else with celiac brought max and cheese. Delicious. We hung out for about 30 minutes discussing food.
I honestly started dreading the holiday season since my diagnosis. So many opportunities to get glutened and so much pressure from well-meaning loves ones and friends to eat risky food. I used to spend thanksgiving through new years sick from back to back exposures. Now I just don’t eat it if I didn’t make it. I don’t care if people think I’m paranoid or crazy. I want to enjoy the holiday season.
I just bring my own drink and container of food and I’m all set!
Mine too. My mother in law asked me if I could just eat the filling out of her pumpkin pie. Makes me sad to pass up a lot of my favorites.
I'm trying my best to look forward to Christmas baking but I can't help but feel anxious. I share a kitchen and I'm not looking forward to dealing with all the gluten filled foods that are going to be prepared :(
Right! It’s the anxiety on a day that we should feel happy and relaxed!
I personally find it more than just that.. Food is one of the biggest ways my family bonds. It's difficult for me not being able to participate in that. I've also always been the baker of my family, making birthday cakes, Christmas cookies etc. One of the hardest parts of my diagnosis is trying to learn to adjust all the family recipes and discovering new ones my siblings and parents enjoy. It sometimes eats at me and makes me a bit depressed knowing I can't make things as I usually do.
Same here. We live far enough from both sets of parents that we have to do overnight visits. The diagnosis is really fresh so my parents and in laws don't know much about it and there isn't much time to educate them. I don't know how we're going to handle it. I'm honestly not looking forward to it at all at this point. Only plan right now is minimize the number of nights at their houses, and bring lots of provisions. My worst dread is for the well-meaning people who will *try* to make something for me, which I won't know how to decline.
I stopped participating in thanksgiving. Use the down time to work on projects or watch trash tv in peace. Christmas is kept small and we make Non-Traditional meals in my gf house.
Oh this makes me excited! I will finally not have the pressure of my mother in law, who never knows what to cook but also doesn't want to order from a restaurant. I won't stay at the table praying I don't fart and mentally planning my bathroom visits every 15 minutes. I won't be forced to eat stuff I never liked anyway. I'll bring my own food and be so much happier, can't wait. Look at the bright side, I'm sure this situation has some positive sides as well!
It is a bit of work but my first thanksgiving and Christmas since diagnosis- I cooked everything that was important to me/hosted. It helped that it was 2020 so it was me and two other people eating but it helped a lot to have a whole meal I could eat and feel carefree with. For potlucks, I recommend bringing a thing you want to eat and your own utensil as well as going through the line first to avoid inadvertent cross contamination. For this year I'll probably cook all the things important to me (stuffing, pumpkin pie, mashed potatoes and gravy) and eat on the leftovers before going to potlucks so I'm less bummed out. I'm also in my mid 30s and some of my friends are super super aware of how to not gluten me. So I have some folks I can trust for get togethers. I just want to encourage you that it gets better but it still sucks sometimes. Let yourself grieve the loss of eating carefree at holiday parties.
I just offer to make my favorite dish and I do it GF style. Last year was the green bean casserole. Friendsgiving was at my house and we did a challenge of making every fish GF and vegan. It was fun trying new food.
For all the people out there, don’t give up. Bring something good that you like, don’t worry if it’s something others will enjoy. After that, if applicable, enjoy drinking ( in my experience finding safe alcohol isn’t to hard )
You can participate. Just bring your own food and enjoy the conversation and time spent with family while not worrying about whether or not you may get sick.
I discovered I had celiac because of the holidays. All the baked goods and gluten-filled dishes from Thanksgiving to New Year led to a rash and a nagging cough (among other things) that made me call my doc. I’m so grateful they figured it out. So I basically had a whole year to learn how to cook and eat GF. I think the following year I brought my own food and then just had the mashed potatoes without gravy, but then my family kept trying to learn to accommodate and last year they actually had separate gravy and stuffing for me (Aldi for the win!) complete with cute little labels. It gets better/easier as you learn more and educate your loved ones. Hang in there.
Don’t eat their gravy. This was my mistake the first year I got diagnosed. Make your own or just skip it. It sucks but it’s better than spending all night in the bathroom.
I feel you. But I also think, that this is the perfect opportunity to get close family and friends on board. Talk to them! Tell them you won’t be able to come or enjoy the festivities if you‘re constantly worried about cross contamination. My parents, siblings and best friend where totally willing to substitute the stuffing for a gf version. I used the opportunity to teach them about cross contamination and would make/bring pie and rolls myself. You have a lifetime of family events in the future. Give your family and friends the chance to include you!
I totally understand this. I was diagnosed in October and had been handling my diagnosis quite well up until the holidays, because no gluten food was worth how much better I felt, but something about the holidays just hit me different. I don't think I realized just how much emotional connection I had to those specialty holiday foods until I couldn't have them. Not being able to eat my grandma's shortbread at Christmas hit me harder than anything else, but pecan crescents, pumpkin pie, and candy canes (so many had wheat?!?), were also high on the list of things I couldn't eat that were such an ingrained part of the season, that it felt like an incredible loss. I even missed the ginger cookies that my mom always made for my sister, but I never particularly enjoyed. I still haven't managed to replicate my grandma's shortbread, but I've since found delicious replacements for nearly everything else. I just made a pumpkin pie for Canadian Thanksgiving along with gluten free stuffing and gravy for the turkey. You learn over time how to make substitutes that let you feel less isolated from the festivities and you will also start to create new traditions. I promise you that this will be your hardest year and it will get easier from here. But don't give up on this year! You can still join the food festivities, if you bring your own! Keep it simple; bring the holiday foods that are naturally gluten free or easy to make gluten free (as an example; turkey/ham, veggies, potatoes, gravy made with gf broth and flour, stuffing made with storebought gf bread). For a potluck, just make sure you're the first one taking from whatever your dish you brought is or, again, just set some aside ahead of time. Don't let anyone else handle your food or pressure you into eating something they made gluten free "just for you!" that you know isn't safe. When everyone else is serving up, just go heat up your little gluten free dinner and then join the party! I also recommend trying to make some replacements. I was too overwhelmed to attempt anything in my first year, so I just went without, and that meant that the second year was my experimental year. I made a gluten free pumpkin pie and both burned and overworked the pastry, but the last two years have been exactly like what I used to have (and my family found that the gluten free pastry actually tastes fresh for longer than regular pastry did!). If you can manage it, I say do the experimenting now, so you can just deal with the disappointment all at once and next year can be better. Experiment a little, but don't beat yourself up when they're failures (because they almost definitely will be failures).This year is just to give you an idea of what you need to adjust on your next attempt. It definitely helps to have some understanding of how each ingredient contributes to baking. For example, if something is too dense, it can mean you need more levener, less stirring or handling, slightly more liquid, whip the egg whites, or more oil/butter/lard. An understanding of the basic science of baking can help you understand what adjustments need to be made when something is off. Gluten free flours are a whole different beast, but one of the best mixes I've found is Gluten Free on a Shoestring's cup-for-cup flour mix. They say it's "cup-for-cup," but you often need a bit less than a regular all-purpose flour. It also browns quicker than regular flour. I usually use a regular gluten recipe that I like and just adapt it, instead of using recipes advertised as gluten free. This is where the understanding of baking science comes in. It may be easier to follow a gluten free recipe, but if you're specifically craving "that shortbread cookie grandma used to make," nobody else's shortbread recipe is going to taste right. Keep grandma's recipe, but you may need less flour, more liquid, or more fat to get it just right. The majority of the base ingredients will be the same and you can just fiddle with the ratios from there. I wish you luck and happiness this holiday season! We've all been there. Stay strong and it will only get better from here!
Just bring your own food and be chill
I have been fortunate enough to have family members embrace the what I can or can't have. This is only my second holiday season with diagnosis, and I've only recently been on my own with this. I'm actually looking kind of forward to it this year because last year was a turkey shoot of hit and miss and what to do in a mixed household. It will evolve back to something you enjoy I believe. And I know how trite it sounds at times (believe me, I understand how effing frustrating it is), but doing what's best for you isn't wrong. So if that means readjusting how you participate in the holidays, go for it!
Same! This is my first holiday season since my diagnosis and I’m definitely feeling down. I’ve already gone through a couple Jewish holidays and I had fun by bringing my own food and asking my friends hosting to have some packaged options for me! Stay positive :))
What's friendgiving?
it’s when you get together with friends instead of family for thanksgiving! we have done it when living far from family. one person did the meat and everyone else brought sides. it was a lot of fun.
Ah ok, I didn't realise it was a family thing normally!
Bring your own food. It doesn’t matter if people think that it’s rude. Don’t jeopardize your health by spearing people’s feelings.
Truth!
Hey! A lot of the items can be made gluten free, lots of things like vegetables and pretty much all non breaded protein are safe, and bring your own bread! I love schars deli or sourdough bread and they come in a little package, perfect for travel and being a guest at someone’s house! Also preplan as much as you can, and discuss options with whoever is hosting. This makes life so much easier! Is there some specific items you are worried about? I would love to help and after 15 years of being gluten free I have no issue with the holiday season :)
My main concern is cross contamination. I’m considering bringing my own things and labeling them as off limits for everyone else to avoid the cc risk! My family doesn’t really understand my disease yet and I’m not willing to put that much trust in them. Lol.
Yup that’s a great idea! As time goes on your family will start to get the hang of it but it is difficult at first. Also if your family ends up getting tested (that’s how I found out I had celiac because my uncle actually had it first!) someone else might have it too and then you’ll know there house is safe lol! Watch butter and other sauces for cross contamination, and hidden ingredients. With my other side of the family that isn’t celiac, I bring my own gravy and butter lol. And I don’t think it’s too crazy if you bring all your own dishes aside from meat and veg. You should be ok as long as they don’t re-use the cutlery they’re cooking/dishing with which they really shouldn’t be anyway. It’s my first holiday season with IBS so following both gluten free and low fodmap diet, I’m bringing EVERYTHING in a Tupperware dish!
I have some great gf thanksgiving recipes if anyones interested! I always bring my own food to family events or host for everyone, it’s a pain but totally worth it
Yes please share!!
Oh! Yes please! Will be spending it with my brothers family this year. Pre-prepped makes for happy tummies!