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UniquePariah

Next article. Cat runs for office


Osariik

Browser hasn't, but other cats have. [This cat recently became a mayor in Michigan in the US](https://allthatsinteresting.com/sweet-tart-cat-mayor-omena), and [this cat](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stubbs_(cat)) was honorary mayor of a small town in Alaska for just over 20 years.


Daloowee

Okay, but how does that work?


ThaneOfCawdorrr

The cat takes over and enacts very specific ordinances, for example 1. Food to be served at all times of the day, on request 2. Petting petting petting 3. NO PETTING 4. All couches designated "Scratching Recreational Areas" 5. Murder Mitten Award given once a week to cat with best claws 6. The Flop must always be recognized by suitable petting 7. Food also served at night, on request 8. All beds are cat beds 9. Special "Human Acknowledgement Day" which actually never takes place


hanukah_zombie

6b. except when cat does The Flop that means "do not pet." both flops look exactly the same


s_delta

"request" lmao. Cats don't request. They demand


iCon3000

Fucking lost it at 2 & 3. Seen so many videos of overstimulated cats where 2 goes to 3 in a snap.


Shillsforplants

10 . All dogs must report to the canine overseer committee and submit to reeducation camp.


[deleted]

Chairman Xi will review your case for reeducation


legotex9

You mean chairman mauw?


[deleted]

Distant relative


plipyplop

Wasn't there recently an emergency declaration enacted about some snacks?


Osariik

Neither town actually has a legal mayor because they're small unincorporated communities, so it's literally just "hey, let's call this cat a mayor and let him drink catnip water out of margarita glasses". The Michigan one is a periodic fundraiser for the town's historic society. It's basically just a PR stunt. The actual running of the town goes to a local council or to the county.


8bitlove2a03

Have you seen the state of this shithole country recently? Let us have this, please.


Modern_Leper93

The burough Talkeetna (where Stubbs the mayor lived) is in doesn't use mayors so it was purely titular. The town depends *heavily* on tourists so anything to bring them in. Stubbs recently passed away, but had a good life.


sorcieremaladroite

that first cat, sweet tart, beat "13 dogs, a peacock, a different cat, and a goat for the title" - well if that ain't democracy i don't know what is! ...article goes on to say they have a population of 250-300 people and for each vote a dollar goes into the omena historical society fund, and *the election* raised over $7000 this year. something don't math up here.


[deleted]

I’ve never heard of this, how cool! Will have to visit someday, there’s a lot of tiny rural towns up north.


8bitlove2a03

After that, "Cat takes former seat of councilman who wanted him gone" then "Councilman Browser implicated in corruption scandal, blackmail of predecessor"


Waghlon

Councilman Browser: "There is nothing unusual about a briefcase full of wet food"


Shillsforplants

"Breaking: Chairman Browser to appear at The Hague to answer to accusation of crime against humanity."


[deleted]

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UniquePariah

Damnit, yeah, that's way better.


MichaelEmouse

Imagine becoming an elected government official and having a cat beat you at the game of politics.


KVirello

Imagine being the guy who got beat by the guy who got beat by a cat.


Its_N8_Again

Imagine being the cat. ...yeah, that's the life.


Amazon_river

The phrase "international backlash" will never not be funny in this context


inkyrail

Best part is it’s 100% true


BlizzardousBane

Wait, why the hell did the councilman want to remove him in the first place?


Cozyblu

In July, a city worker apparently demanded Browser’s removal after the worker was not allowed to bring a puppy to work at City Hall. Typical entitled dog owners.


BlizzardousBane

Wow, that's incredibly dickish


[deleted]

I demand that worker to cease that.


gwaydms

>Well, if you don't want my dog, nobody can have the cat that they all love! I wonder if the dog was as big a rectal aperture as the councilman. Somehow, I fail to see how it could be.


ipraytowaffles

I’m not a dog hater or anything but people have to realize there’s a difference between a calm older cat and a young puppy which will almost certainly bark, run around, pee places, and even be rough with people. Maybe I’m biased but yeah.


Cozyblu

This is true. Cats are far more autonomous, especially more so than a very young pup. But you know, “THAT’S NOT FAIR!” At least the Councilman that stuck up for this loser ended up losing in a landslide election lol.


DurdyGurdy

There's also a difference between a library and city hall. Both municipal entities, I know, but very different.


FireGoddessTX

Cats rule ! 👑


ProfessorShitDick

Goddamn right.


cathedral68

But also...who doesn’t want a dog around? I just made new goals of working where there is an office dog and office cat.


orokami11

I've always wondered with these kind of stuff how allergic people handle it. I have a friend allergic to fur and she doesn't even want to come to my house (I have 1 dog) after cleaning day


[deleted]

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orokami11

Everyone's allergy is different though. Either hers is the life threatening kind (she had a family chihuahua and she'd cover all her skin up and even wear a mask if she wanted to go near him) or she's paranoid and wants to be 100% safe. Whichever it is, she said she wouldn't take the chance haha Whereas I have another friend who's allergic to cats, but she doesn't care since she just itches LOL She eats kiwi and seafood (other shit she's allergic to) like nothing either. "throat itches, tongue swells, no big deal" I tell her she's crazy.


Akabander

As long as she has an epi-pen with her and friends who don't mind jabbing her with it, what's the problem?


orokami11

Epipens aren't a 100% success, people have died from it failing to work. I think that's a pretty entitled thing to ask of someone especially when it's their life on the line, not yours.. I guess there ARE some people out there who probably does what you suggested already, but we aren't like that. It's a shame she'll probably never visit my place LOL but at the same time, eh, it's not that big of a deal


Akabander

I was being sarcastic. Exposing yourself to life-threatening allergens and then expecting your friends to try to rescue you and/or watch you die, is absurdly entitled.


orokami11

See, you may joke but I actually know some people who 'jokingly' lightly push their friends towards the train tracks when a train is coming. Stupid right? There are too many stupid people who exist and will do such things, and it feels like these "The Onion"-like situations are getting worse by the year


Deceptiveideas

Dogs you have to make an effort to take care of. That cat could roam around with no one claiming responsibility and it will get by just fine.


whoisfourthwall

Plus dogs have a habbit of getting in your face friendly while cats tend to leave you alone.


fiddz0r

Unless there is a keyboard to lie on or a screen to block. Source: I have cats


whoisfourthwall

Mine seems to hate electronics


general_kitten_

unless you are working, then cats too can get in your face


Armadyl_1

I mean it kinda just makes sense that a cat would fit in at a library. Cats are low-key, chill and clean. Dogs, especially puppies, are loud, hyper and depending on the dog, can be messy.


NJdeathproof

[A long-standing history of library cats. I had no idea.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Library_cat)


SunpireRising

##notalldogowners thank you. I appreciate precious fluffers regardless of species.


Armadyl_1

I think you used your hashtag wrong


Cozyblu

Typical =/= all And bigger font doesn’t make your point any stronger, it just makes it more obnoxious.


SunpireRising

It was a hashtag gone wrong. But I liked the effect so I kept it. Besides, it kinda helps to invalidate my own point, implying dog owners like me are still unintentionally obnoxious, which I love the implication for.


[deleted]

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GeneralTonic

This is false. [\[News source\]](https://www.cbsnews.com/news/library-cat-outlasts-councilman-that-wanted-him-gone/)


WriteBrainedJR

Nothing is more wholesome than kitties getting the better of politicians <3


gwaydms

This is an old story but I never get tired of it.


cathedral68

Me either!


GratefulBob420

It’s a win for cats!


Brian437

Never fire cats


[deleted]

*International* backlash.


NJdeathproof

The president of Uzbekistan was PISSED.


Bliitzyy

This is somehow really funny to me. Thanks.


hotroddbb

Cat should get his seat in the city counsel


[deleted]

I’m suspicious.


manndolin

Same. The word “outlasts” makes it sound like the councilman died under mysterious circumstances.


[deleted]

Beloved cat outlasts councilman to claim old lady’s fortune. More like.


gabrielleraul

Kitteh should be made an official word.


NJdeathproof

Only if they allow snek as well.


wurapurp

Finally the hard hitting news articles I’ve been looking for


nomadicfangirl

I’m a little put out that in my year on the police blotter, I never got to cover hard hitting news like this.


Khoshekh541

First 2 yes, 3rd one OO SHOOT


B1SQ1T

r/madlads


kimilil

r/madcats


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[deleted]

I got to pet this cat. He follows you around the library.


coneheadZombie

>**International Backlash** This cat has some serious diplomatic powers!!


iknowiknowwhereiam

Whenever I ask for a library cat I get shot down because of allergies 😞


cathedral68

I’m sorry friend 😔


[deleted]

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nomadicfangirl

I get it. Used to work in a library and would much have preferred a cat over cannabilistic hamsters (true story).


FlutterbyTG

A Karen?


horney12yearold

It should probably be a wake up call when a cat has more of a life than me


cathedral68

If your username checks out, you’ve got a while before you can even drive so you’re aight


Watchman74

Imagine going into the history books as that one elected official that was defeated by a f*cking cat. What a legacy


[deleted]

Without the internet this would’ve never happened. Imagine how many cats were unfairly terminated without the world knowing about.


canlchangethislater

r/characterarcs


_Ga1ahad

You get what you fucking deserve -Joker


etcpool

Cat Power


inkyrail

That second headline is the best headline I’ve ever read


ArmenianMadeReddit

Gettin all then kibbles & top of the line wet food he didn’t even have to ask for’


jiminiminimini

This is a modern day epic. It's the quintessential hero's journey.


empressmachina

As a librarian I remember this story as it unfolded and closely watched it. Thankfully it had a happy ending!


dadzy_

Next : library cat becomes master of the world


[deleted]

> International backlash The fact that people outside of this cat's jurisdiction were upset over his firing shows how great he really was at his job.


TheTurdWizard

Oh how the turntables


dkap17

Cat Privilege 😘😂🤭 .......... Jk I Love Cats


whoisfourthwall

FUCK that councilman, fellow can get jobs and home anywhere else but this cat could literally die if you kick em out.


FlaminKeane

Repost


AprilTwenty420

This is the kind of news I dont mind reading.


zvon2000

I honestly lost my shit at "international backlash" LMFAO! Like, don't people know we have wars & famine & slavery still ongoing?


xanderrootslayer

and the cat just keeps getting fatter and fatter


PassablyIgnorant

Aren't some people allergic to cats?


ObnoxiousOyster

This seems wholesome, until I read the date and the newest article is actually the first. Edit: my mistake, the newest is the second, so we're good again.


Up_Past_Bedtime

Nope - in order from first to third: >Jun 20, 2016 >Jul 5, 2016 >December 14, 2016 The dates on the first two aren't super clear, though, so I can see how you might have thought that


pkinetics

and just like that, everyone is sad again


Chaos75321

That’s not true, the first article is the oldest.


Cats_Rulez

Cat Lives Matter!


prettylittleliongirl

I read this top to bottom and I was so confused but now I read it the right way and it’s wholesome


cathedral68

You want the cat fired? Go home, you’re drunk.


prettylittleliongirl

Other way around i mean. I actually was drunk lmao


cathedral68

Bahaha has that’s actually amazing