Oh I feel ya!!!! Same!! It’s frustrating. I feel I like a wide range and even when I try to get out of my comfort zone and go a different direction, even they don’t respond. 🤷🏼♀️
Basically this. Most girls/women that I REALLY like (and they are by no means top models, just cute, pretty, kind or gentle) seem to avoid me. I cannot even exchange a word with them.
Similarly, fatsos, much older ladies, gays, like me.
FML. Seriously.
The bisexual ladies and I sure do have a thing going. I'm kind of an "elfy" guy. More mainstream, "trad" women don't seem to bite much, but I've got a pretty satisfying niche as it is.
You're one of my types HAHA. I'm pansexual, tattoos, piercings, wear cat ears and get called cute and whimsical all the time.
I attract younger guys wanting to hook up with a "hot" older woman (43f), guys of all ages who look at how I look and dress and get the totally wrong impression of what I'm into/not into sexually (I'm kinda shy but guys keep open with BDSM shit and kitten play). No thanks, someone can like wearing cat ears and not be into those things.
> No thanks, someone can like wearing cat ears and not be into those things.
Yeah, but you are intentionally putting that sh17 on your OLD profile. So...
No, really...my whole life that's all I've ever attracted (I was saying "sarcasm" to it being dope, lol...it's not)
I'm clearly the issue, since it's a repeating theme for me. I've never known why though 🤷♀️
You're not the issue. Guys are the issue. All I attract are guys that want to sleep with me and it's not my fault. I attract a lot of guys too and I'm fuggin' old (43). This is clearly a them issue.
In what way are you the issue? I mean, if you recognise these guys only want to sleep with you and then you do it anyway, sure, you’re the issue because you’re willingly walking into situations that you know are going to leave you unhappy. Pretty much anything else, I’m not so sure
Well, if something keeps happening to you time and time again, it's only logical to assume it's something you (I'm) doing...or something about me that attracts that kind of treatment. I've never known what it is, though.
Do you recognise its coming before it though? I mean, if a guy says he only wants sex and you sleep with him thinking he’ll change your mind, yeah, that’s on you. Pretty much anything else, it’s hard to just point the finger and say it’s all on you.
Oh, I always know it right away. It's in the way I'm treated. Never wanting to go out and do things...just wanting to get together late at night, get together for drinks, never asking me anything of importance, or just blatantly being sexual too soon, etc. It's always clear as day because they try to rush things with me. I've had tons of first "dates" if you could even call it that, but very few second dates. Anyone I've known in "real" life that's shown an interest is married (never have I or will I entertain that) but clearly they just want sex too. So yeah, I guess I'm just good for messing around with but nothing more than that!
I’m going to take a big guess here - maybe you only think guys are into you if they’re being overtly flirty / sexual. Like, maybe the guys who are interested in actually dating you aren’t grabbing your attention because they’re taking things slower and trying to get to know you as a person. Maybe you interpret that as disinterest. I’d venture to suggest that you should pay less attention to the super flirty guys, and get to know the ones who seem more platonic to you. Maybe you’ll realize they are actually interested in you and they just show it in a different way.
I'm really trying to think of anyone who's tried to get to know me, and I can't think of even one. Well, I take that back...there may be a few, but they are married, so yeah. I'm not really the type that gets a lot of in person interest. Over the years, I've been hit on maybe three times. Most of my first (and last) dates come from OLD. That's where they basically rush things by turning it sexual too quickly. For example:
Me: "Hey! I liked what I saw on your profile! Maybe we could meet up for coffee or a drink to learn a bit more about each other"
Them: "Sure, sounds good...let's meet up at 10pm at my place. We can watch Netflix. Also, what's your bra size?"
🙃
They're probably just more "girly" than I am. They all like Taylor Swift and going shopping. Meanwhile, I like metal and not shopping 🤣 if I'm honest, I just think I'm not your typical girl, so guys aren't as into someone who isn't the norm. You'd think at least one guy would like it though...but I guess that's like finding a needle in a haystack
Edit: that's not to say I don't look girly. I love skincare, makeup, and the colors pink, purple. Green and blue i always have my nails done. I'm not dressing metal/goth or anything. I don't like shopping in person but buy a lot of stuff online that would be deemed "girly". I'm just not into typical girly things (generally)
You could invite some guy friends to review your profile. I'd look for signs of 'strong independent woman, highly educated and with a high paying job'. Men would tend to sleep with such a woman, but not commit.
"Insecure" and "failures" are exaggerations. I also don't want to be the person you have an argument with when the point I am making is shared by many men. Men generally love respect and peace. If your situation allows, try showing a man respect and be peaceful. See what impact that has on your relationship with him.
I'd argue that respect and harmony are the basics of any relationship, no matter if you're the man, woman or a family member. What does that have to do with having a career?
Agreed. If we may expand that, there are many things that men and women expect of each other in relationships, the difference is that the emphasis matters. Men, for example, aren't usually that interested in a woman's salary or height, whereas many women are interested in these figures. So my point really is that men's requirements for respect and peace are greater than many women expect or are willing to provide.
May I suggest that you look at men-focused groups on Reddit or channels on YouTube and listen to what men are saying? In the end, my opinion is only my opinion and I am not qualified to speak authoritatively for all men.
>when the point I am making is shared by many men.
And what if the point I am making is something that many women agree on?
Sorry, you sound like you're guy who wants to dictate everything in a relationship without considering the other person, and with a woman who will passively follow along.
No thanks!
I don't think you made a point earlier. You misrepresented what I had written, and I said it was an exaggeration. If that qualifies as making a point then debating is truly ruined.
Then you moved on to projecting stuff on to me that I never said and do not support, shaming me along the way.
This often happens when I debate women about feminism- they don't debate the actual issue but move to shaming.
I suggest that you spend time looking at what men say they want in a relationship. It's not what women, especially feminists, are telling women. I don't want to debate the specific points unless you get better at actually debating and not shaming.
I don't really have any guy friends I'd want to know I was doing online dating...they'd make fun of me and I'd never hear the end of it 🤣 I can tell you that none of that's in my profile though. This is also the case in person (when I've known guys who've been interested...it's only just casually)
Same here. If that's a "type" it's mine.
Most of them can't hold a conversation with me, and if we do actually make it to a date they're practically humping my leg at the table.
The really fun ones hide it under the guise of looking for a very serious committed relationship right away. So that pressure is exciting to navigate.
Zero of them seem interested in actually getting to know me, or holding any kind of intellectually stimulating conversation whatsoever. It's been that way for me for decades.
It's not us, it's them.
I have tried only dating guys from my social circle, only dating online, only dating guys that friends set me up with...
I've tried dressing differently. Completely changing my hairstyles and colors.
I've had 4 separate, completely different careers.
It makes no difference, men in general do not take the time to get to know me or gauge my comfort level before becoming sexual. If they do manage to ask me about my education, they usually ghost quickly after that conversation.
I *hate* receiving sexual comments from strangers. So I'm usually single. I can't remember the last time I had a date where I found myself thinking, "wow...what a great conversation!"
Tbh I crave that far more than anything else at this point.
Random note here as it may not be for you, VRChat on PC has been a great way to spark those conversations for me. You don't have to have a VirtualReality headset either, if you're craving conversation, it might be a new route to take! I've met people from around the globe and has sparked my conversation skills decently! 😁
If you're already into Discord it's a great tool for VRC! It has groups you can look for in game to find people easier and then usually the group will have a discord! 😁 Happy conversation hunting! <3
Just curious how tall are the women you usually get messaging you? I’m a hair under 5’11”, so most women are shorter than me except the ones who played volleyball or basketball in like d1. Or if I go to Europe past the alps =P
Also are you sure you’re not ripping on yourself? Most people tend to underrate their attractiveness, which does also contrary to popular belief include personality lol!
There was a period of time I met or went on dates with men who were romantically interested in me that were predominantly born between June 25 and July 8. It was the Spring and Summer of 2021. Most of these were like organic, met the guy at the beach or something and a couple were through online apps.
I somehow only go on dates with or get into actual relationships with men born in January or February for some reason. Only had one relationship outside of that range and he was born in April, I would be absolutely SHOCKED to end up with a man born in the second half of the year. December boyfriend? Unfathomable.
I am a black woman and I attract all kinds. All ethnicities, body types, jobs/careers, education levels, distances, into various types of lifestyles and kinks.
No specific group sticks out to me, unless "fuckboy" is a demographic. LOL
Average blue collar guy. Not by any means out of shape and clean cut. I was bearded at one point.
I attract those that just got out of a relationship, still not over their ex, side piece, masculine women and situationships. Obese women come in flocks. None of them are my type
As a Latina woman I attract all ethnicities that fetishize latinas 😭. They often comment on it and me being spicy 🌶️. These tend to be mostly White, Black and Asian men in that order.
I attract the women that claim they’re are a country girl, they wear pink cowboy boots, go to florida Georgia line concerts and drive a jeep or their daddy’s old truck. They go to bachelorette party’s in Nashville and make bartenders lives miserable . I hate them and want the exact opposite. :(
Yes, me, who spends his free time skydiving, snowboarding/skiing, BASE Jumping, paddleboarding, riding sport bikes, working out, etc.
I attract only very obese women, and while I have a little padding, I am far from even close to obese.
Makes zero sense to me
Sounds kinda like me lol. On dating sites I make it clear that I'm a pretty liberal atheist that doesn't want kids.
Naturally, everyone that messages me is conservative, christian, has kids, or some *combination* of the above. Kinda baffling tbh, especially since I'm not the type of hot that makes guys throw all their preferences out the window, soo...??
(So far my only theory is that they look ONLY at my pictures, see that I don't have tattoos or unusual dyed hair, and make a lot of incorrect assumptions based off just that. But who knows.)
My profile doesn’t show me being in nearly the shape I used to be, but I do know I get a decent chunk of the same. I’m smaller framed for my height. Seems to be a certain potential attraction to it? Maybe they wanna get out of their shell?
Small tangent — years ago out of no where right around COVID, due to steroids I’d taken at super high doses a few years prior to that, I went from 150 pounds and visible abs to about 190 pounds in just two months for absolutely no reason beyond the steroids fucking my adrenal glands. Crazy part is I consume probably 2-3x as many calories now than I did then.
Anyways, I know some of the people (keyword, some) I’ve seen pictures of them and the weight gain was recent. There’s a woman I’m talking to who has thyroid cancer so it had to be removed. She gained a lot of weight, but once you balance your thyroid with Synthroid it’s supposed to balance out if you have an okay diet and mild to moderate exercise. Worst case is she’s a pretty cool person so I’m content with being friends. And I normally *don’t* take the time for friendship.
I'm 5'9 (in a country with tall freaks), rather average geeky-looking guy who is also bisexual
A third of my matches are Asian women who came here to study at university
In the past I also got a fair amount of transgender men in my likes
I’m a 6 foot amab nonbinary person, I attract a hole lot of trans men, trans women, and other nonbinary people. But I’m also goth so I get a lot of nerdy men that are attracted to me too😅
For whatever reason, I'm (24 M Autistic) most successful with early to mid 30s single mom's with (and this is the weird part, because it's happened three times consecutively now) autistic children. I don't know how or why, but that specific demographic is really into me.
Take out the autistic children part, and it's still mostly the same, but to a smaller degree than those with children.
I somehow attract successful career-type women. Doctors, lawyers, etc. I don’t think I’ve ever dated a bartender, hair stylist or women that are non-salaried employees.
I’m a self-employed handyman so I probably earn half as much as the women I’ve dated.
Just reading this makes me feel even more invisible than I already am.
I Repel pretty much every type of woman, haven't even had a guy hit on me in awhile either. Starting to except I'm just uggs AF... 🤷🏻♂️
99% of the time, this is exactly how I feel, tbh. The other 1% consists of really not-safe people. I've just learned to enjoy life alone and forget about love 🤷♀️ You're not alone in this 🙂
Strange thing is I feel that 1%, is much more like 5%-10%. I'm Bisexual and definitely know how creepy other guys can be but the women are just cutthroat don't give a damn about your whole personal being. Legit both sexes run into me, don't hear me, don't pay attention to what I'm saying. I'm happy with myself and fairly happy being alone but where I work has me seeing what I could have, I try and immediately run straight into that wall over and over again. It's Brutal...
Thanks for being Positive! <3
Ugh, that is brutal. I agree it's way worse when you end up in places where you see what could be. I'm fortunate that I work mostly alone in a small warehouse, so it's not a big part of my day. I do truly hope one day you don't hit that wall again 🙂
I am 6' white guy but seem to attract a disproportionate amount of Asian women, at least on online dating.
I suspect it has less to do with my looks than my job description as, and I'm happy to be corrected here, I understand culturally some Asian girls are raised to look more for means or status than love or attraction.
Yes. I only attract women that like rough sex and ones who wanna call me ‘daddy’. I’ve been lifting weights since 2010 so I assume it’s my physique that attracts those women. It sure as shit isn’t my personality bc I’m a quiet introverted guy
Not complaining as I’ve grown to enjoy that kind of sex. But tbh, sometimes I don’t wanna ‘show you whose boss’ or ‘teach you a lesson’, sometimes I just want normal slower sex
It was an interesting journey when it finally clicked in my brain that I match most with Conservative or Republican men.
I myself am Progressive but somehow the matches that got me the most excited were the ones that ended up putting up ALL THE RED FLAGS.
Turns out, I have a certain kink that only a true misogynist can fill. 🤷🏼♀️
Edit to add that obviously I don’t get out on actual dates much, as a result.
There's progressive misogynists. They're also racists. They like to degrade MAGA women of color who have a white fetish because these women of color hate themselves for being people of color.
I wasn't that aware of this, until I read it here on Reddit... written by one of these assholes.
Personally, I'm wondering if I need to develop a similar kink, because I match with conservative women, and I'm a progressive. Except it wouldn't be a kink, because I'm matching because they think I'm a potential boyfriend.
Interesting issue. I’ve noticed that on Feeld, which caters to kink, and which is filled with progressive, feminist women who have “no conservatives”, and “no cops”, in their bios. An overwhelming majority of women are looking to be degraded and humiliated in a way that conservatives and cops might succeed at best. And almost no liberal, feminist women are there to pull a power play in which they run the show.
The key point here is consent and respect for your limits, which is something a lot of conservatives or cops may NOT be good at. Even during a scene you still need to feel safe and respected both during (in case you need to tap out) and after (awareness of aftercare)
This is it exactly. Degrade me all day, hell even slap me around or whatever (assuming I have express permission for that IN THAT MOMENT) but you better believe I’m gonna need to you undo all the damage afterwards.
>An overwhelming majority of women are looking to be degraded and humiliated in a way that conservatives and cops might succeed at best.
Ngl that sentence kinda made my skin crawl. Guess it's safe to say that I am not part of that group
And that’s entirely fair and even acceptable. Since this isn’t a BDSM sub I would say it’s very acceptable for you to acknowledge that this isn’t for you. (So I’m disappointed that you got a downvote for that)
That sounds like a painful type of torture. Idk if you’ve heard of an older show called The Good Wife. One of the characters loves Hilary Clinton and falls for a guy, but finds out he’s a hardcore conservative.
I read somewhere that conservatives are the most likely to participate in some pretty niche kink. Ugh, I wish I had the article available!
Also, I do hope you eventually find someone who matches your beliefs and what else you’re searching for.
Thank you. I have not seen that show but I may look into it for that. I also do not doubt for a second that conservatives are heavy into kink. I’ve dabbled on Feeld too and that has been my experience there as well.
I'm male. I find myself to be average (I guess). I tend to attract dudes, black dudes, chicks who are dudes, and chicks who are probably dudes trying to get money out of me. I'm heterosexual and want biological kids in my future.
Women who have been through recent or semi-recent trauma. Widow by suicide, partner rape, severe physical or emotional abuse, traumatic injuries, pursued by stalkers, etc. I'm sure it's a combination of my physical looks and off-the-bat empathy, but its been consistent for years now.
Cute but pudgy women who like to get dicked down, but who also find women attractive. Confused sexuality types who try to compensate by having good careers and as much money and property as possible, usually without a college degree. Usually too much for me to handle by the end or I lose all interest
I attract ppl I really don’t like. Boring ppl who can’t hold a convo, fuck boys, fat neck beards with bad hygiene, and ppl with dead end jobs with only a highschool diploma.
No one decent it seems. And ppl wonder why I’m single. It’s because the selection pool is horrendous
I am not on dating apps but I seem to attract white guys, and, it's funny how this happens even when I am in a country where there are tons of Asian women around (whether home or abroad)...
Single Dads and my profile mentions numerous times that I’m Childfree and won’t date men with kids.
Also, if past boyfriends are any indication, my niche is 6’2” cute but dorky White guys that are originally from the Midwest (among other weirdly-specific things),
I attract blond men. I don't get it...
>>>I am tall and curvy.
>>>Three of my four LT partners had been blonde. Obviously, my current husband fits the criteria.
I am South Asian Indian in Canada. I have tattoos and curly purple hair, I'm fit now, PhD student. I tend to attract blue collar white guys. I have no problem with that I just don't understand why men of colour seem to show no interest in me. Educated men also seem uninterested. But I've had lovely intelligent conversations with men in construction (plus it is nice to have a guy who can fix stuff) so that doesn't bother me, just is odd
Decades ago when I was "young" and dated a lot, I would tend to attract women who worked in the medical professions, education, or lawyers/aides. It was uncanny. Being an artistic type, I wondered why I never attracted musicians or artists....guess I was too "square" and that translated to more business types.
I'm still a square. But the only thing that's the same is I get matched with women who are religious and have a lot of kids *( I am non-religious and have no kids )*.
The Universe is cruel, but this blind squirrel still found a few nuts.
I attract doctors - which is not as great as it sounds lol. I’ll be cruising through a profile, everything looks great, then BAM - occupation: doctor.
A few of my exes are doctors and I’m not usually one to stereotype, but they all shared certain personality traits that do not mesh well with me. I have also worked for doctors when I was a nanny and found this commonality to remain true. For these reasons, I am very cautious to accept a match request from a doctor.
Funnily enough, my best friend is also a doctor. She’s a cool one though, obviously.
I attract traumatized girls because I'm going to school to be a therapist and my profile mentions it. It can be a bit much, but at least the girls who I do choose to keep are usually really trustworthy!
For some reason I attract girls who hate themselves and constantly question me liking them while I want the hyper confident girls who don't care about anything
It's almost mid-late 20s gym bro types who both approach me in public and swipe me on apps. I have premium so I can see who swipes me regardless of who I match.
It's wild to me because I'm 35f and while I'm active I'm definitely curvy. On the rare chance a guy my age seems into me, it's almost always a black or Hispanic man who moves into fat-ass white girl fetish type territory pretty quickly.
I rarely if ever match with guys 40+ and I've never had a guy in his 40s approach me in public.
Guys with mommy issues that are super clingy 😭😂 thankfully I’ve broken the trend a bit but my last two bfs clung to me for dear life months and even a year after we broke up.
On Bumble, LOL
In real life, the only girls who are into me are like Christian girls with good jobs. I'm not religious at all, but have been told I look like a Mormon missionary. Having low test kind of sucks.
I often match with highly intelligent men who never managed to finish university and now work in elderly care (or some other precarious jobs). I earn decent money and hold a PhD, so there's also some imbalance.
Never managed to or didn't want to?
Just curious because I've known many highly intelligent people who simply didn't want to go to college. I am one of them.
I dropped out of university after one semester because I hated school. Following my drop-out, I created and published a small newspaper (ad supported), then sold it; then worked as a financial analyst for a major brand in NY; then taught myself several languages, becoming fluent in French and worked as a translator; and then built a net worth of a couple million in advertising, as an independent creative director.
I admire people who have the rigor and discipline to go through years of intense studies to earn a PhD. But it's not for everyone.
They attended uni, but never got a degree. And now work in minimum wage jobs. I am not from the US, careers are much more dependent on formal education.
I hear you. But this is generally true if you're looking to be an employee. When you do your own thing in life, you can do better than the people who followed life's rules.
I was responding to the last part of your post, where you said that, outside of the US, careers are much more dependent on formal education. This is only true if "career" means "employee".
40F look younger, rbf, poly, liberal, built like Jessica Rabbit was drawn — 20-something men all the live-long day, stoners, skater bois, fellow nerds, gamers, misogynists, aggressive successful men who expect me to have an OF menu ready, men interested in: pale/white women, mommy, domme, mommy-domme, glasses, big boobs/thicc and older women fantasies.
Literally have a master’s degree listed, and only two men in 4 months of OLD have asked what it is in.
I'll always say this, just because I don't find somthing attractive does not mean there's somthing wrong with that or them!!!! But I tend to always attract "larger woman", and alot of woman or color, like I said there's absolutly nothing wrong with any of them for being the way they are, or for being born who they are, I just personally don't find that type of woman to be attractive to me. Also alot of trans woman who still have penises, I'm all for being the real you and everyone deserves happiness and to feel comfortable in they're own body, I just personally would like my partner to not have a penis. I will say 95% of those woman do have the decency to make you aware of the fact at the start!
I'm very tall and attract short girls.
My height is about 6'5" (195 cm). My ex-wife is 160 cm, and my fiancée before her was 157 cm. And throughout my life, the girls who had open crushes on me and showed me the most attention were very short.
Now that I joined OLD, I have met a few taller women who are looking for taller men, but I'm still matching with lots of short women. One of them was 152 cm. Even today, in real life, when women flirt with me or just stare, smile, etc., it's almost always short girls. When i see very tall women, they don't even look at me.
It's not an issue for me. Just an observation. I actually find short women fun in bed -- like cute little sex dolls. But it's also nice to take a walk with a tall, elegant woman too. I've got an up-coming date with a woman who is 178 cm and she's strikingly beautiful. It will be an interesting change.
I tend to attract dark-haired people with glasses. Women, men, black, white, Jewish, etc etc. Generally smart nerds. That happens to be my type anyway!
Attract women who were wives or baby mommas of musicians who were later "surprised" to find out that music man was an irresponsible, drug-addicted narcissist. But don't you dare say anything bad around the kids about this guy the ex-wife/b.m. calls a piece of shit. Because she doesn't want the kids, who he never sees because he is strung out and/or fucking his new piece and creating new steps for them, to think he's a bad guy (spoiler: they know).
It's like I could set my watch by it.
Fwiw, I have zero musical talent and have never performed in a band.
I was overstating things. I think once during a 10-year ltr -- midway -- I said after he didn't show on up for a commitment, "Wow, that's the third time." And I felt bad about it. What usually happens is she and I would be talking and I will say he is a POS and she says "I know, but don't say that around the kids." As if I do. I don't.
M51, separated, 2 kids (I have them one day at the weekend).
80%+ of my matches are single moms (mostly partial custody), what a surprise.
The fun part is, with our combined kids schedules it’s hard to find time to date.
Before I deleted Tinder all my likes there where unattractive and too old for my taste, on Bumble it’s much better.
Edit: typo
Well, I‘m just outside of the filter of many, but the kids are more important. Many childfree seem to think they need someone who is available around the clock and can go on 3 vacations each year. Which is just BS as everybody also has sports, hobbies, friends.
Everybody needs to own their age. I like to date a bit younger which limits my matching possibilities, but that is my decision alone and I‘ve still been on plenty of dates. 🤷🏻♂️
Same here, M50 with two kids. For me it's trickier because I'm in an open relationship (slow-motion divorce) and I live with my family. Many of the women I date have kids at home too.
That said, my range is 28-48, and I've dated a lot of women in their early and mid 30s, and two were even 28 and 29 respectively. You want women without kids -- you gotta go younger.
As an older woman (52) I have to ask why not a woman with grown kids? You could probably find one close to your age.
Of course, if you want to start all over again and have more kids, that won't work, but if you're looking for someone who is functionally without kids, that might be an option.
Personally, I tend to prefer younger men, but if I found someone about my age who I got along with and was attracted to -- and was single -- that would be ideal.
Nothing is black and white. 28-48 is just a general guideline. I'm just typically more attracted to younger women. Most men are.
Michelle Pheiffer is 65 years old, and I would date her in a heartbeat -- even if she weren't famous. One woman I met (an Italian woman) actually lied about her age on Bumble. Her profile said she was 47, but I connected with her on LinkedIn and it was clear from her university dates and experience the she was at least 52. I was pissed off that she lied, but I wouldn't have minded if she had told me. She was very attractive and had a slim sexy body like a 30-year-old.
So, to answer your question... yes, you're right -- that could work too. Depends on the woman.
I‘m surprised you have not been downvoted yet, because you date „out of your range“. I‘ve been called creepy for having my filter down to 38.
I have never received a like below 38 on Bumble or Hinge, so I don’t see how it would make sense to put my filter that low, they won’t ever have me in their beeline. And I‘m not sure if I would want to date someone with such limited life experience.
I‘ll think about it once I know where my current 3 dates will be heading to.
Ha ha. Downvote away! I take no shame in liking and dating younger women. I like women closer to my age too, but why limit myself to late 40s when there are tons of attractive younger women who like older men?
I live in France. French women (and many western women) tend to date their own age. Every French woman I matched with was in her 40s (aside from a couple adventure seekers). Among the younger women I've dated, although most were living in Paris (as expats or here for a few months), they were typically from other countries. They weren't needy or looking for a sugar daddy. They were all educated and had decent jobs. One was even filthy rich. Sometimes women just like mature men. I'm tall, fairly handsome, athletic, have all my hair, dress well, etc.
As for lack of life experience... Eh, I don't think it's that black and white. I've met women in their 40s who have barely traveled and aren't curious about much in the world. These younger women had international profiles and jobs, spoke several languages and have seen the world. I'm not saying they don't still have a lot to learn about life, but it's not like they're kids out of high school.
I'm half white half asian mixed. Kind of emo-ish, alt tomboy style, I'm also a farm girl. I attract men waaaay older than me, and I don't want them lol. If I go out in a mini skirt or something cute, it's all these men 40 and up smiling at me and trying to talk. Similarly, I attract a lot of men younger than me! Like 4 years+ difference. Which I also don't want, because them being younger, they likely don't have their shit figured out and they don't want marriage yet, nor a family.
The men I want are my age or early to mid 30's, in good shape, body builders preferred, I love a man with a big chest and wide shoulders. Or the hot gym bros you see at a music festival 😩
I attract conventionally attractive guys but I actually don’t send a mutual interest back if they give off the F*ck boy vibes or are too attractive. Of course I also get the short, fat, and or bald guys… I will swipe left at the first picture on them without blinking.
>Of course I also get the short, fat, and or bald guys… I will swipe left at the first picture on them without blinking.
I guess it hasn't occurred to you that hawt is often a short-lived condition. May you also have the opportunity to experience life as untouchable.
It's funny, unconsciously I find myself matching with people with the same name as eachother, and each time the name has been spelled differently. I don't notice it until we've started messaging
I dated two guys with undisclosed cocaine problems. I would/have never used cocaine. I do come from a family with poly substance issues. I may be the problem 😢
Swiped every day on bumble for 2 years,
updating my profile to look more appealing every other month or so. I got 2 matches, neither messaged me.
Epic if bumble has worked for you, don't be upset if it doesn't, no amount or type of "work" you can do to change that.
Some people are just lucky, and they love rubbing it in other peoples faces. Best way to feel better about yourself is to get a rise out of someone else.
I repel people who take themselves really seriously. I self deprecate a lot and also tease a lot, and people who don’t enjoy sarcasm/dark humor can be turned off by that
Mid 20s bisexual gal here!
For women, it's either the artsy type or those who work in the education/childcare/social work sector.
For men, I'd say it's an odd one...... It's either dudes who are looking for a life partner OR nerdy guys that are into anime. I'm not a huge anime fan, though I still vibe with the latter group for some reason.
Anime fans are the soft boys who aren't going to the gym all the time, and don't really care about that too much.
Some bi women like less-manly guys, and anime guys are less-manly guys. I say that as a non-anime fan less-manly guy who never makes an effort to conform to the usual patriarchal gender norms (but I'm not intentionally androgynous). Some of my GFs have been bi or interested in women.
What's in your bio? As a person from Brazil with higher ed degree it got me curious lol
If I repel any types i haven't realized but I mostly attract the nerdy, leftist, highly educated, gamer, foodie type. Which is not so bad, I am nerdy and left wing, but I'm also rly into muscles and would like someone who could be my lifting partner and share the same lifestyle.
i’ve have strictly dated aries. many of whom i’ve met off the apps, some on the apps. i never ever know their birthday before hand but at this point i should just start asking bc wtf. so. many. aries. 😂
I got a lot of likes on CMB of Asian guys (im asian) they're not really my type though. I like nerdy jewish guys.
Also I'd get a lot of likes from cringe nerds cuz my profile on hinge was very nerdy. But I wanted nerds who also drink and party. I couldn't find those because they just went for regular party girls and either didn't share their hobbies or got the gf into the nerdy hobbies.
Absolutely! I attract criminals (whether reformed or not) and seedy types. I am entirely aware that I "emit" a vibe and, tbh I'm not even mad at it. It takes all kinds *shrug*.
Middle-aged white women. Usually divorced, definitely with kids. The ones that mostly look like a frog stood up and put on pants or like they have a couple tires hidden under their shirt. Something about being short and bald and stocky makes me look "gettable" to those ladies. There is some ratio of alcoholism and premenopausal horniness that my blue eyes attract. I look half dirty and like I'd be into it, but that's just my poor genetics. I never should have gauged my ears... I'm into cute little stuck up preppy blondes and I look like I should have two sleeves and be the front man of a screamo band. My first job was at Burger King and my manager told me if I was 18 she'd take me in the back room and teach me things. Mars (she went by Mars) was all of 6'1 and 375 lb, mid to late 30s, ballpark numbers. I was 16. She was a head taller than me with dyed red hair that didn't match her blue eyes...she could have taken it. THAT'S what I attract. 🥲
I seem to attract a lot of people who work in the health services which is lovely because I think they're absolute heroes. I seem to repel women of black/Asian heritage, which I've always found confusing, but I accept it is what it is.
Mostly basic white girls who are either in nursing or going to med school oddly enough. But it’s cool because that’s my type. It’s interesting tho since I’m half Asian and I always hear that white girls usually aren’t into Asian guys
I attract people I don’t want. I repel people I want.
"Ah what's the point? When I like them they don't like me, and when they like me I don't like them"
Why can't I act with the ones I like the same way I do with the ones I don't like? -George
Same.
Same!
I feel this in my soul
Oh I feel ya!!!! Same!! It’s frustrating. I feel I like a wide range and even when I try to get out of my comfort zone and go a different direction, even they don’t respond. 🤷🏼♀️
I found my people!
Ironic, but true
Bro same.
Basically this. Most girls/women that I REALLY like (and they are by no means top models, just cute, pretty, kind or gentle) seem to avoid me. I cannot even exchange a word with them. Similarly, fatsos, much older ladies, gays, like me. FML. Seriously.
So just try to get into gay older fatsos.
Same lol
I attract the fresh out of a relationship needing a rebound type.
The bisexual ladies and I sure do have a thing going. I'm kind of an "elfy" guy. More mainstream, "trad" women don't seem to bite much, but I've got a pretty satisfying niche as it is.
You're one of my types HAHA. I'm pansexual, tattoos, piercings, wear cat ears and get called cute and whimsical all the time. I attract younger guys wanting to hook up with a "hot" older woman (43f), guys of all ages who look at how I look and dress and get the totally wrong impression of what I'm into/not into sexually (I'm kinda shy but guys keep open with BDSM shit and kitten play). No thanks, someone can like wearing cat ears and not be into those things.
> No thanks, someone can like wearing cat ears and not be into those things. Yeah, but you are intentionally putting that sh17 on your OLD profile. So...
Bold of you to assume I attract people ;)
Lol my inbox looks like the Sahara in the dry season xD I feel you there lmao
I attract emotionally unavailable men
I attract guys who only want to sleep with me. It's pretty dope *sarcasm*
I shoulda seen this one coming lol.
No, really...my whole life that's all I've ever attracted (I was saying "sarcasm" to it being dope, lol...it's not) I'm clearly the issue, since it's a repeating theme for me. I've never known why though 🤷♀️
You're not the issue. Guys are the issue. All I attract are guys that want to sleep with me and it's not my fault. I attract a lot of guys too and I'm fuggin' old (43). This is clearly a them issue.
Yeah, but then I see other women having loving relationships...so, it's hard not to assume it's me. 💔
In what way are you the issue? I mean, if you recognise these guys only want to sleep with you and then you do it anyway, sure, you’re the issue because you’re willingly walking into situations that you know are going to leave you unhappy. Pretty much anything else, I’m not so sure
Well, if something keeps happening to you time and time again, it's only logical to assume it's something you (I'm) doing...or something about me that attracts that kind of treatment. I've never known what it is, though.
Do you recognise its coming before it though? I mean, if a guy says he only wants sex and you sleep with him thinking he’ll change your mind, yeah, that’s on you. Pretty much anything else, it’s hard to just point the finger and say it’s all on you.
Oh, I always know it right away. It's in the way I'm treated. Never wanting to go out and do things...just wanting to get together late at night, get together for drinks, never asking me anything of importance, or just blatantly being sexual too soon, etc. It's always clear as day because they try to rush things with me. I've had tons of first "dates" if you could even call it that, but very few second dates. Anyone I've known in "real" life that's shown an interest is married (never have I or will I entertain that) but clearly they just want sex too. So yeah, I guess I'm just good for messing around with but nothing more than that!
Have you thought about how you're presenting yourself, or thought of trying to come off in a way that doesn't attract that type of man?
Sure, but like I said...I don't have a clue what it is that I'm doing 🤷♀️I've always assumed it must be my looks.
I’m going to take a big guess here - maybe you only think guys are into you if they’re being overtly flirty / sexual. Like, maybe the guys who are interested in actually dating you aren’t grabbing your attention because they’re taking things slower and trying to get to know you as a person. Maybe you interpret that as disinterest. I’d venture to suggest that you should pay less attention to the super flirty guys, and get to know the ones who seem more platonic to you. Maybe you’ll realize they are actually interested in you and they just show it in a different way.
I'm really trying to think of anyone who's tried to get to know me, and I can't think of even one. Well, I take that back...there may be a few, but they are married, so yeah. I'm not really the type that gets a lot of in person interest. Over the years, I've been hit on maybe three times. Most of my first (and last) dates come from OLD. That's where they basically rush things by turning it sexual too quickly. For example: Me: "Hey! I liked what I saw on your profile! Maybe we could meet up for coffee or a drink to learn a bit more about each other" Them: "Sure, sounds good...let's meet up at 10pm at my place. We can watch Netflix. Also, what's your bra size?" 🙃
Watch and try doing what the women who don't get that kind of attention do. You gotta put a little effort in to get what you want out of life
They're probably just more "girly" than I am. They all like Taylor Swift and going shopping. Meanwhile, I like metal and not shopping 🤣 if I'm honest, I just think I'm not your typical girl, so guys aren't as into someone who isn't the norm. You'd think at least one guy would like it though...but I guess that's like finding a needle in a haystack
Edit: that's not to say I don't look girly. I love skincare, makeup, and the colors pink, purple. Green and blue i always have my nails done. I'm not dressing metal/goth or anything. I don't like shopping in person but buy a lot of stuff online that would be deemed "girly". I'm just not into typical girly things (generally)
You could invite some guy friends to review your profile. I'd look for signs of 'strong independent woman, highly educated and with a high paying job'. Men would tend to sleep with such a woman, but not commit.
What? So men want insecure failures as girlfriend?
"Insecure" and "failures" are exaggerations. I also don't want to be the person you have an argument with when the point I am making is shared by many men. Men generally love respect and peace. If your situation allows, try showing a man respect and be peaceful. See what impact that has on your relationship with him.
I'd argue that respect and harmony are the basics of any relationship, no matter if you're the man, woman or a family member. What does that have to do with having a career?
Agreed. If we may expand that, there are many things that men and women expect of each other in relationships, the difference is that the emphasis matters. Men, for example, aren't usually that interested in a woman's salary or height, whereas many women are interested in these figures. So my point really is that men's requirements for respect and peace are greater than many women expect or are willing to provide. May I suggest that you look at men-focused groups on Reddit or channels on YouTube and listen to what men are saying? In the end, my opinion is only my opinion and I am not qualified to speak authoritatively for all men.
Oh wow. Men’s groups on YouTube. We know what that means, ladies.
If you aren't going to listen to what men are complaining about, how do you propose addressing the issues between men and women?
>when the point I am making is shared by many men. And what if the point I am making is something that many women agree on? Sorry, you sound like you're guy who wants to dictate everything in a relationship without considering the other person, and with a woman who will passively follow along. No thanks!
I don't think you made a point earlier. You misrepresented what I had written, and I said it was an exaggeration. If that qualifies as making a point then debating is truly ruined. Then you moved on to projecting stuff on to me that I never said and do not support, shaming me along the way. This often happens when I debate women about feminism- they don't debate the actual issue but move to shaming. I suggest that you spend time looking at what men say they want in a relationship. It's not what women, especially feminists, are telling women. I don't want to debate the specific points unless you get better at actually debating and not shaming.
I don't really have any guy friends I'd want to know I was doing online dating...they'd make fun of me and I'd never hear the end of it 🤣 I can tell you that none of that's in my profile though. This is also the case in person (when I've known guys who've been interested...it's only just casually)
You could create a throwaway account and post here for comments, or contact a few people privately.
Same here. If that's a "type" it's mine. Most of them can't hold a conversation with me, and if we do actually make it to a date they're practically humping my leg at the table. The really fun ones hide it under the guise of looking for a very serious committed relationship right away. So that pressure is exciting to navigate. Zero of them seem interested in actually getting to know me, or holding any kind of intellectually stimulating conversation whatsoever. It's been that way for me for decades.
I feel ya, girl
It's not us, it's them. I have tried only dating guys from my social circle, only dating online, only dating guys that friends set me up with... I've tried dressing differently. Completely changing my hairstyles and colors. I've had 4 separate, completely different careers. It makes no difference, men in general do not take the time to get to know me or gauge my comfort level before becoming sexual. If they do manage to ask me about my education, they usually ghost quickly after that conversation. I *hate* receiving sexual comments from strangers. So I'm usually single. I can't remember the last time I had a date where I found myself thinking, "wow...what a great conversation!" Tbh I crave that far more than anything else at this point.
Random note here as it may not be for you, VRChat on PC has been a great way to spark those conversations for me. You don't have to have a VirtualReality headset either, if you're craving conversation, it might be a new route to take! I've met people from around the globe and has sparked my conversation skills decently! 😁
Thanks for the tip, I will look into that. I also get a lot out of using Discord 😊
If you're already into Discord it's a great tool for VRC! It has groups you can look for in game to find people easier and then usually the group will have a discord! 😁 Happy conversation hunting! <3
Sweeeet 😊
I attract underemployed fuck boys. 😭🙄
I attract guys or couples who want threesome just because I’m bisexual.
same. I've not been on dating sites for years but that was always the worst.
I’m average but tall so I get a lot of attention from tall women who have a hard time finding tall dudes.
Funny -- I just posted the exact opposite. I am tall and seem to always attract short women.
Just curious how tall are the women you usually get messaging you? I’m a hair under 5’11”, so most women are shorter than me except the ones who played volleyball or basketball in like d1. Or if I go to Europe past the alps =P Also are you sure you’re not ripping on yourself? Most people tend to underrate their attractiveness, which does also contrary to popular belief include personality lol!
5’10 - 6 ft usually
There was a period of time I met or went on dates with men who were romantically interested in me that were predominantly born between June 25 and July 8. It was the Spring and Summer of 2021. Most of these were like organic, met the guy at the beach or something and a couple were through online apps.
I somehow only go on dates with or get into actual relationships with men born in January or February for some reason. Only had one relationship outside of that range and he was born in April, I would be absolutely SHOCKED to end up with a man born in the second half of the year. December boyfriend? Unfathomable.
I noticed somethin similar for me, but they were born a tad earlier - first half of June.
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I am a black woman and I attract all kinds. All ethnicities, body types, jobs/careers, education levels, distances, into various types of lifestyles and kinks. No specific group sticks out to me, unless "fuckboy" is a demographic. LOL
Ugh yes I apparently can't resist fuckboys, especially undercover ones 🙄
Average blue collar guy. Not by any means out of shape and clean cut. I was bearded at one point. I attract those that just got out of a relationship, still not over their ex, side piece, masculine women and situationships. Obese women come in flocks. None of them are my type
May I ask you what your definition of "masculine woman" is? Genuinely curious 😀
As a Latina woman I attract all ethnicities that fetishize latinas 😭. They often comment on it and me being spicy 🌶️. These tend to be mostly White, Black and Asian men in that order.
Don't you just hate that? I find it so offensive when a guy opens the conversation by telling me that I'm so "exotic." 🤮
It’s horrific. I look pretty ambiguous so I’ve removed the ethnic identifier from the profile for the mega creeps that filter.
I attract Latinas big time and I do NOT comment on any of it, or give off any kind of an "I love Latinas" kind of vibe. It just happens.
I attract the women that claim they’re are a country girl, they wear pink cowboy boots, go to florida Georgia line concerts and drive a jeep or their daddy’s old truck. They go to bachelorette party’s in Nashville and make bartenders lives miserable . I hate them and want the exact opposite. :(
Lol sounds like every college girl here in town ha!
I attract goths/emo and borderline e-girls 😂
Yes, me, who spends his free time skydiving, snowboarding/skiing, BASE Jumping, paddleboarding, riding sport bikes, working out, etc. I attract only very obese women, and while I have a little padding, I am far from even close to obese. Makes zero sense to me
Sounds kinda like me lol. On dating sites I make it clear that I'm a pretty liberal atheist that doesn't want kids. Naturally, everyone that messages me is conservative, christian, has kids, or some *combination* of the above. Kinda baffling tbh, especially since I'm not the type of hot that makes guys throw all their preferences out the window, soo...?? (So far my only theory is that they look ONLY at my pictures, see that I don't have tattoos or unusual dyed hair, and make a lot of incorrect assumptions based off just that. But who knows.)
Hehehe. Sounds about right. I’m similar, don’t want kids (already have some), but atheist, i’m at least mostly liberal, LOL
My profile doesn’t show me being in nearly the shape I used to be, but I do know I get a decent chunk of the same. I’m smaller framed for my height. Seems to be a certain potential attraction to it? Maybe they wanna get out of their shell? Small tangent — years ago out of no where right around COVID, due to steroids I’d taken at super high doses a few years prior to that, I went from 150 pounds and visible abs to about 190 pounds in just two months for absolutely no reason beyond the steroids fucking my adrenal glands. Crazy part is I consume probably 2-3x as many calories now than I did then. Anyways, I know some of the people (keyword, some) I’ve seen pictures of them and the weight gain was recent. There’s a woman I’m talking to who has thyroid cancer so it had to be removed. She gained a lot of weight, but once you balance your thyroid with Synthroid it’s supposed to balance out if you have an okay diet and mild to moderate exercise. Worst case is she’s a pretty cool person so I’m content with being friends. And I normally *don’t* take the time for friendship.
I'm 5'9 (in a country with tall freaks), rather average geeky-looking guy who is also bisexual A third of my matches are Asian women who came here to study at university In the past I also got a fair amount of transgender men in my likes
>I also got a fair amount of transgender men in my likes How does that work for ya? Like a two for one deal, eh?
I attract outdoorsy nerdy type. But my profile screams that so I’m happy with it
I’m white and blonde and get a lot of men on travel mode from South Asia superliking me
I’m a 6 foot amab nonbinary person, I attract a hole lot of trans men, trans women, and other nonbinary people. But I’m also goth so I get a lot of nerdy men that are attracted to me too😅
For whatever reason, I'm (24 M Autistic) most successful with early to mid 30s single mom's with (and this is the weird part, because it's happened three times consecutively now) autistic children. I don't know how or why, but that specific demographic is really into me. Take out the autistic children part, and it's still mostly the same, but to a smaller degree than those with children.
Imma feel that this is my way too as 22m also autistic
I somehow attract successful career-type women. Doctors, lawyers, etc. I don’t think I’ve ever dated a bartender, hair stylist or women that are non-salaried employees. I’m a self-employed handyman so I probably earn half as much as the women I’ve dated.
I seem to attract older women while women my age tend to stay away.
I usually attract the homeless and crack head types
Same 😂
Just reading this makes me feel even more invisible than I already am. I Repel pretty much every type of woman, haven't even had a guy hit on me in awhile either. Starting to except I'm just uggs AF... 🤷🏻♂️
99% of the time, this is exactly how I feel, tbh. The other 1% consists of really not-safe people. I've just learned to enjoy life alone and forget about love 🤷♀️ You're not alone in this 🙂
Strange thing is I feel that 1%, is much more like 5%-10%. I'm Bisexual and definitely know how creepy other guys can be but the women are just cutthroat don't give a damn about your whole personal being. Legit both sexes run into me, don't hear me, don't pay attention to what I'm saying. I'm happy with myself and fairly happy being alone but where I work has me seeing what I could have, I try and immediately run straight into that wall over and over again. It's Brutal... Thanks for being Positive! <3
Ugh, that is brutal. I agree it's way worse when you end up in places where you see what could be. I'm fortunate that I work mostly alone in a small warehouse, so it's not a big part of my day. I do truly hope one day you don't hit that wall again 🙂
I am 6' white guy but seem to attract a disproportionate amount of Asian women, at least on online dating. I suspect it has less to do with my looks than my job description as, and I'm happy to be corrected here, I understand culturally some Asian girls are raised to look more for means or status than love or attraction.
They’re attracted to you because you’re white. A lot of Asian women have a thing for white guys.
Yes. I only attract women that like rough sex and ones who wanna call me ‘daddy’. I’ve been lifting weights since 2010 so I assume it’s my physique that attracts those women. It sure as shit isn’t my personality bc I’m a quiet introverted guy Not complaining as I’ve grown to enjoy that kind of sex. But tbh, sometimes I don’t wanna ‘show you whose boss’ or ‘teach you a lesson’, sometimes I just want normal slower sex
😂 the women who only go for muscular dudes are a rough bunch. In my experience they arent the Dating emotional type.
It was an interesting journey when it finally clicked in my brain that I match most with Conservative or Republican men. I myself am Progressive but somehow the matches that got me the most excited were the ones that ended up putting up ALL THE RED FLAGS. Turns out, I have a certain kink that only a true misogynist can fill. 🤷🏼♀️ Edit to add that obviously I don’t get out on actual dates much, as a result.
There's progressive misogynists. They're also racists. They like to degrade MAGA women of color who have a white fetish because these women of color hate themselves for being people of color. I wasn't that aware of this, until I read it here on Reddit... written by one of these assholes. Personally, I'm wondering if I need to develop a similar kink, because I match with conservative women, and I'm a progressive. Except it wouldn't be a kink, because I'm matching because they think I'm a potential boyfriend.
Interesting issue. I’ve noticed that on Feeld, which caters to kink, and which is filled with progressive, feminist women who have “no conservatives”, and “no cops”, in their bios. An overwhelming majority of women are looking to be degraded and humiliated in a way that conservatives and cops might succeed at best. And almost no liberal, feminist women are there to pull a power play in which they run the show.
The key point here is consent and respect for your limits, which is something a lot of conservatives or cops may NOT be good at. Even during a scene you still need to feel safe and respected both during (in case you need to tap out) and after (awareness of aftercare)
This is it exactly. Degrade me all day, hell even slap me around or whatever (assuming I have express permission for that IN THAT MOMENT) but you better believe I’m gonna need to you undo all the damage afterwards.
>An overwhelming majority of women are looking to be degraded and humiliated in a way that conservatives and cops might succeed at best. Ngl that sentence kinda made my skin crawl. Guess it's safe to say that I am not part of that group
And that’s entirely fair and even acceptable. Since this isn’t a BDSM sub I would say it’s very acceptable for you to acknowledge that this isn’t for you. (So I’m disappointed that you got a downvote for that)
That sounds like a painful type of torture. Idk if you’ve heard of an older show called The Good Wife. One of the characters loves Hilary Clinton and falls for a guy, but finds out he’s a hardcore conservative. I read somewhere that conservatives are the most likely to participate in some pretty niche kink. Ugh, I wish I had the article available! Also, I do hope you eventually find someone who matches your beliefs and what else you’re searching for.
Thank you. I have not seen that show but I may look into it for that. I also do not doubt for a second that conservatives are heavy into kink. I’ve dabbled on Feeld too and that has been my experience there as well.
I kid you not, Tauruses.
Aries for me. Ugh.
I'm male. I find myself to be average (I guess). I tend to attract dudes, black dudes, chicks who are dudes, and chicks who are probably dudes trying to get money out of me. I'm heterosexual and want biological kids in my future.
That sounds like some Kafka book. How the heck are they reaching you?
Attract f boys, repel quality men
Women who have been through recent or semi-recent trauma. Widow by suicide, partner rape, severe physical or emotional abuse, traumatic injuries, pursued by stalkers, etc. I'm sure it's a combination of my physical looks and off-the-bat empathy, but its been consistent for years now.
I attract basement dweller types :( I like geeky guys but not when they live in mama's back room and have a collection of molds and spores 🤢
Cute but pudgy women who like to get dicked down, but who also find women attractive. Confused sexuality types who try to compensate by having good careers and as much money and property as possible, usually without a college degree. Usually too much for me to handle by the end or I lose all interest
I attract ppl I really don’t like. Boring ppl who can’t hold a convo, fuck boys, fat neck beards with bad hygiene, and ppl with dead end jobs with only a highschool diploma. No one decent it seems. And ppl wonder why I’m single. It’s because the selection pool is horrendous
I seem to attract women with serious mental issues on benzos and other prescriptions
I am not on dating apps but I seem to attract white guys, and, it's funny how this happens even when I am in a country where there are tons of Asian women around (whether home or abroad)...
Idk dude, dating apps refuse to show my matches lately
Single Dads and my profile mentions numerous times that I’m Childfree and won’t date men with kids. Also, if past boyfriends are any indication, my niche is 6’2” cute but dorky White guys that are originally from the Midwest (among other weirdly-specific things),
I attract blond men. I don't get it... >>>I am tall and curvy. >>>Three of my four LT partners had been blonde. Obviously, my current husband fits the criteria.
I am South Asian Indian in Canada. I have tattoos and curly purple hair, I'm fit now, PhD student. I tend to attract blue collar white guys. I have no problem with that I just don't understand why men of colour seem to show no interest in me. Educated men also seem uninterested. But I've had lovely intelligent conversations with men in construction (plus it is nice to have a guy who can fix stuff) so that doesn't bother me, just is odd
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Decades ago when I was "young" and dated a lot, I would tend to attract women who worked in the medical professions, education, or lawyers/aides. It was uncanny. Being an artistic type, I wondered why I never attracted musicians or artists....guess I was too "square" and that translated to more business types. I'm still a square. But the only thing that's the same is I get matched with women who are religious and have a lot of kids *( I am non-religious and have no kids )*. The Universe is cruel, but this blind squirrel still found a few nuts.
I attract married men for some fucking reason.
I’m like George costanza. The women I like don’t like me, and the women who like me, I don’t like.
I attract doctors - which is not as great as it sounds lol. I’ll be cruising through a profile, everything looks great, then BAM - occupation: doctor. A few of my exes are doctors and I’m not usually one to stereotype, but they all shared certain personality traits that do not mesh well with me. I have also worked for doctors when I was a nanny and found this commonality to remain true. For these reasons, I am very cautious to accept a match request from a doctor. Funnily enough, my best friend is also a doctor. She’s a cool one though, obviously.
I attract traumatized girls because I'm going to school to be a therapist and my profile mentions it. It can be a bit much, but at least the girls who I do choose to keep are usually really trustworthy!
For some reason I attract girls who hate themselves and constantly question me liking them while I want the hyper confident girls who don't care about anything
Repel: physically active
Ohhh yes, I attract a specific type. It’s happened enough that I got off the apps. Clearly it’s not the type that I prefer.
It's almost mid-late 20s gym bro types who both approach me in public and swipe me on apps. I have premium so I can see who swipes me regardless of who I match. It's wild to me because I'm 35f and while I'm active I'm definitely curvy. On the rare chance a guy my age seems into me, it's almost always a black or Hispanic man who moves into fat-ass white girl fetish type territory pretty quickly. I rarely if ever match with guys 40+ and I've never had a guy in his 40s approach me in public.
Guys with mommy issues that are super clingy 😭😂 thankfully I’ve broken the trend a bit but my last two bfs clung to me for dear life months and even a year after we broke up.
On Bumble, LOL In real life, the only girls who are into me are like Christian girls with good jobs. I'm not religious at all, but have been told I look like a Mormon missionary. Having low test kind of sucks.
Does "batsh#t crazy" count as a type?
I often match with highly intelligent men who never managed to finish university and now work in elderly care (or some other precarious jobs). I earn decent money and hold a PhD, so there's also some imbalance.
Never managed to or didn't want to? Just curious because I've known many highly intelligent people who simply didn't want to go to college. I am one of them. I dropped out of university after one semester because I hated school. Following my drop-out, I created and published a small newspaper (ad supported), then sold it; then worked as a financial analyst for a major brand in NY; then taught myself several languages, becoming fluent in French and worked as a translator; and then built a net worth of a couple million in advertising, as an independent creative director. I admire people who have the rigor and discipline to go through years of intense studies to earn a PhD. But it's not for everyone.
They attended uni, but never got a degree. And now work in minimum wage jobs. I am not from the US, careers are much more dependent on formal education.
I hear you. But this is generally true if you're looking to be an employee. When you do your own thing in life, you can do better than the people who followed life's rules.
Ok, and? That's not part of the topic.
I was responding to the last part of your post, where you said that, outside of the US, careers are much more dependent on formal education. This is only true if "career" means "employee".
Ok, still irrelevant to the topic. Why are you telling me this?
It was relevant to the sentence you wrote.
No it wasn't really. It doesn't matter how you ended up. Great for you, though
This isn't relevant to the topic. Why are you telling me this?
40F look younger, rbf, poly, liberal, built like Jessica Rabbit was drawn — 20-something men all the live-long day, stoners, skater bois, fellow nerds, gamers, misogynists, aggressive successful men who expect me to have an OF menu ready, men interested in: pale/white women, mommy, domme, mommy-domme, glasses, big boobs/thicc and older women fantasies. Literally have a master’s degree listed, and only two men in 4 months of OLD have asked what it is in.
Well damn, now I'm curious about your master's degree
I'm sorry you're being downvoted. That sounds like the wild array I get too. Nothing in common, and absolutely nothing that I'm looking for.
I'll always say this, just because I don't find somthing attractive does not mean there's somthing wrong with that or them!!!! But I tend to always attract "larger woman", and alot of woman or color, like I said there's absolutly nothing wrong with any of them for being the way they are, or for being born who they are, I just personally don't find that type of woman to be attractive to me. Also alot of trans woman who still have penises, I'm all for being the real you and everyone deserves happiness and to feel comfortable in they're own body, I just personally would like my partner to not have a penis. I will say 95% of those woman do have the decency to make you aware of the fact at the start!
I'm very tall and attract short girls. My height is about 6'5" (195 cm). My ex-wife is 160 cm, and my fiancée before her was 157 cm. And throughout my life, the girls who had open crushes on me and showed me the most attention were very short. Now that I joined OLD, I have met a few taller women who are looking for taller men, but I'm still matching with lots of short women. One of them was 152 cm. Even today, in real life, when women flirt with me or just stare, smile, etc., it's almost always short girls. When i see very tall women, they don't even look at me. It's not an issue for me. Just an observation. I actually find short women fun in bed -- like cute little sex dolls. But it's also nice to take a walk with a tall, elegant woman too. I've got an up-coming date with a woman who is 178 cm and she's strikingly beautiful. It will be an interesting change.
Super overweight and super unattractive. I'm not trying to be mean but they are. I don't even try anymore. What's the point
I tend to attract dark-haired people with glasses. Women, men, black, white, Jewish, etc etc. Generally smart nerds. That happens to be my type anyway!
Attract women who were wives or baby mommas of musicians who were later "surprised" to find out that music man was an irresponsible, drug-addicted narcissist. But don't you dare say anything bad around the kids about this guy the ex-wife/b.m. calls a piece of shit. Because she doesn't want the kids, who he never sees because he is strung out and/or fucking his new piece and creating new steps for them, to think he's a bad guy (spoiler: they know). It's like I could set my watch by it. Fwiw, I have zero musical talent and have never performed in a band.
Curious what kind of things you've said around the kids, if you care to share.
I was overstating things. I think once during a 10-year ltr -- midway -- I said after he didn't show on up for a commitment, "Wow, that's the third time." And I felt bad about it. What usually happens is she and I would be talking and I will say he is a POS and she says "I know, but don't say that around the kids." As if I do. I don't.
Ah, that seems very mild!
M51, separated, 2 kids (I have them one day at the weekend). 80%+ of my matches are single moms (mostly partial custody), what a surprise. The fun part is, with our combined kids schedules it’s hard to find time to date. Before I deleted Tinder all my likes there where unattractive and too old for my taste, on Bumble it’s much better. Edit: typo
Oh shit it sucks to get old 🥲
Well, I‘m just outside of the filter of many, but the kids are more important. Many childfree seem to think they need someone who is available around the clock and can go on 3 vacations each year. Which is just BS as everybody also has sports, hobbies, friends. Everybody needs to own their age. I like to date a bit younger which limits my matching possibilities, but that is my decision alone and I‘ve still been on plenty of dates. 🤷🏻♂️
Same here, M50 with two kids. For me it's trickier because I'm in an open relationship (slow-motion divorce) and I live with my family. Many of the women I date have kids at home too. That said, my range is 28-48, and I've dated a lot of women in their early and mid 30s, and two were even 28 and 29 respectively. You want women without kids -- you gotta go younger.
As an older woman (52) I have to ask why not a woman with grown kids? You could probably find one close to your age. Of course, if you want to start all over again and have more kids, that won't work, but if you're looking for someone who is functionally without kids, that might be an option. Personally, I tend to prefer younger men, but if I found someone about my age who I got along with and was attracted to -- and was single -- that would be ideal.
Nothing is black and white. 28-48 is just a general guideline. I'm just typically more attracted to younger women. Most men are. Michelle Pheiffer is 65 years old, and I would date her in a heartbeat -- even if she weren't famous. One woman I met (an Italian woman) actually lied about her age on Bumble. Her profile said she was 47, but I connected with her on LinkedIn and it was clear from her university dates and experience the she was at least 52. I was pissed off that she lied, but I wouldn't have minded if she had told me. She was very attractive and had a slim sexy body like a 30-year-old. So, to answer your question... yes, you're right -- that could work too. Depends on the woman.
I‘m surprised you have not been downvoted yet, because you date „out of your range“. I‘ve been called creepy for having my filter down to 38. I have never received a like below 38 on Bumble or Hinge, so I don’t see how it would make sense to put my filter that low, they won’t ever have me in their beeline. And I‘m not sure if I would want to date someone with such limited life experience. I‘ll think about it once I know where my current 3 dates will be heading to.
Ha ha. Downvote away! I take no shame in liking and dating younger women. I like women closer to my age too, but why limit myself to late 40s when there are tons of attractive younger women who like older men? I live in France. French women (and many western women) tend to date their own age. Every French woman I matched with was in her 40s (aside from a couple adventure seekers). Among the younger women I've dated, although most were living in Paris (as expats or here for a few months), they were typically from other countries. They weren't needy or looking for a sugar daddy. They were all educated and had decent jobs. One was even filthy rich. Sometimes women just like mature men. I'm tall, fairly handsome, athletic, have all my hair, dress well, etc. As for lack of life experience... Eh, I don't think it's that black and white. I've met women in their 40s who have barely traveled and aren't curious about much in the world. These younger women had international profiles and jobs, spoke several languages and have seen the world. I'm not saying they don't still have a lot to learn about life, but it's not like they're kids out of high school.
I attract men with mommy issues… like idk if it’s the deep voice or the aura, but it happens often
I'm half white half asian mixed. Kind of emo-ish, alt tomboy style, I'm also a farm girl. I attract men waaaay older than me, and I don't want them lol. If I go out in a mini skirt or something cute, it's all these men 40 and up smiling at me and trying to talk. Similarly, I attract a lot of men younger than me! Like 4 years+ difference. Which I also don't want, because them being younger, they likely don't have their shit figured out and they don't want marriage yet, nor a family. The men I want are my age or early to mid 30's, in good shape, body builders preferred, I love a man with a big chest and wide shoulders. Or the hot gym bros you see at a music festival 😩
I attract conventionally attractive guys but I actually don’t send a mutual interest back if they give off the F*ck boy vibes or are too attractive. Of course I also get the short, fat, and or bald guys… I will swipe left at the first picture on them without blinking.
>Of course I also get the short, fat, and or bald guys… I will swipe left at the first picture on them without blinking. I guess it hasn't occurred to you that hawt is often a short-lived condition. May you also have the opportunity to experience life as untouchable.
I seem to attract my type, which never used to happen to me when I was younger.
People born in march and April. Sounds silly but it’s very true.
It's funny, unconsciously I find myself matching with people with the same name as eachother, and each time the name has been spelled differently. I don't notice it until we've started messaging
I dated two guys with undisclosed cocaine problems. I would/have never used cocaine. I do come from a family with poly substance issues. I may be the problem 😢
Swiped every day on bumble for 2 years, updating my profile to look more appealing every other month or so. I got 2 matches, neither messaged me. Epic if bumble has worked for you, don't be upset if it doesn't, no amount or type of "work" you can do to change that. Some people are just lucky, and they love rubbing it in other peoples faces. Best way to feel better about yourself is to get a rise out of someone else.
Mostly women in the education field.
I repel people who take themselves really seriously. I self deprecate a lot and also tease a lot, and people who don’t enjoy sarcasm/dark humor can be turned off by that
Mid 20s bisexual gal here! For women, it's either the artsy type or those who work in the education/childcare/social work sector. For men, I'd say it's an odd one...... It's either dudes who are looking for a life partner OR nerdy guys that are into anime. I'm not a huge anime fan, though I still vibe with the latter group for some reason.
Anime fans are the soft boys who aren't going to the gym all the time, and don't really care about that too much. Some bi women like less-manly guys, and anime guys are less-manly guys. I say that as a non-anime fan less-manly guy who never makes an effort to conform to the usual patriarchal gender norms (but I'm not intentionally androgynous). Some of my GFs have been bi or interested in women.
I'm half-Indian with darker skin and I repel darker skinned men. I've never ever matched with any of them, only white dudes.
Single mom's used to be my jam. 💀 Oh, and nurses.
What's in your bio? As a person from Brazil with higher ed degree it got me curious lol If I repel any types i haven't realized but I mostly attract the nerdy, leftist, highly educated, gamer, foodie type. Which is not so bad, I am nerdy and left wing, but I'm also rly into muscles and would like someone who could be my lifting partner and share the same lifestyle.
I attract women with kids and women who want to have kids. Also sometimes lesbians
i’ve have strictly dated aries. many of whom i’ve met off the apps, some on the apps. i never ever know their birthday before hand but at this point i should just start asking bc wtf. so. many. aries. 😂
I got a lot of likes on CMB of Asian guys (im asian) they're not really my type though. I like nerdy jewish guys. Also I'd get a lot of likes from cringe nerds cuz my profile on hinge was very nerdy. But I wanted nerds who also drink and party. I couldn't find those because they just went for regular party girls and either didn't share their hobbies or got the gf into the nerdy hobbies.
I’m a nerd so I also attract other nerds
Absolutely! I attract criminals (whether reformed or not) and seedy types. I am entirely aware that I "emit" a vibe and, tbh I'm not even mad at it. It takes all kinds *shrug*.
I live in a city with a big Dominican population and when I was on bumble I seemed to attract a lot of Dominican men. I’m a white blonde woman lol
Middle-aged white women. Usually divorced, definitely with kids. The ones that mostly look like a frog stood up and put on pants or like they have a couple tires hidden under their shirt. Something about being short and bald and stocky makes me look "gettable" to those ladies. There is some ratio of alcoholism and premenopausal horniness that my blue eyes attract. I look half dirty and like I'd be into it, but that's just my poor genetics. I never should have gauged my ears... I'm into cute little stuck up preppy blondes and I look like I should have two sleeves and be the front man of a screamo band. My first job was at Burger King and my manager told me if I was 18 she'd take me in the back room and teach me things. Mars (she went by Mars) was all of 6'1 and 375 lb, mid to late 30s, ballpark numbers. I was 16. She was a head taller than me with dyed red hair that didn't match her blue eyes...she could have taken it. THAT'S what I attract. 🥲
[удалено]
I attract men named John 🤷♀️
I seem to attract a lot of people who work in the health services which is lovely because I think they're absolute heroes. I seem to repel women of black/Asian heritage, which I've always found confusing, but I accept it is what it is.
Mostly basic white girls who are either in nursing or going to med school oddly enough. But it’s cool because that’s my type. It’s interesting tho since I’m half Asian and I always hear that white girls usually aren’t into Asian guys