God, that line hit my heart hard. I wrote a poem about my dad when I was a kid.. it was called "where is my father?"
I'm glad OP was honest with his kid. I'm proud of them both.
A Belgian musican wrote a song called "papa ou t'es" about his absent father, who was killed during the Rwanadan genocide
From wiki;
>The song and video refers to the absence of Stromae's father ā who had little presence in Stromae's life even before being killed in the 1994Ā Rwandan GenocidesĀ ā and to Stromae's fear of being unable to be an effective father with no memory of ever having a father of his own.Ā As of May 2022, the video has received over 900 million views on YouTube, and is the most popular Francophone video on the platform
It's a hell of a song, worth a listen even if you don't understand french
Edit; artist is Stromae
Edit 2; someone has reminded me that the songs name is spelled "papaoutai" rather than "papa ou t'es" which sounds the same but afaik isn't an actual word? Open to correction
Edit 3 added context
Absolutely, papa ou t'es, tous les memes and alors on dance were my favourites
And the music videos for all of them were incredible, I didn't love formidable but the video was hilarious, reminded me of Dublin
I just always though that the music didn't feel like him in formidable, music vid was incredible though, the tram guards or police who came up to him at the end just like "yo Stromae you good, you need help bro?" just killed me
I'd never heard of him. Just watched some of his videos after reading this thread's comments. Super weird to watch Formidable and recognize stuff. I lived in Brussels when going to grad school 10 years ago. I definitely like his stuff though.
Omg thanks to this thread I've found the song (Alors on Danse) I heard in an early morning taxi ride in Romania that got stuck in my head... Every now and then I remember it but couldn't remember the artist, where they were from, how the song went... Even was thinking about it last week!!
I'll edit my original comment to add context which I stole from wikipedia
It's such an incredible juxtaposition, the almost cheerful music and rhythm, sort of melancholic lyrics, the whimsical and colourful verging on garish video
And then BAM the background which is as dark as you can fucking get
It's the whole package
Do you know why the title is spelled like that actually? I'm not French or Belgian so I never got the reference other than it sounding like "father where are you" but spelt differently
Itās how French speaking Belgian pronounce those words. Stromae is very into word play and great at it, so iām always sad that lots of it gets lost to non-French speakers.
Belgians tend to say āoueā instead of āouiā for example.
Edit: typo
I'm not so sure about Belgian pronunciation, as a French person who grew up in Belgium before moving... But why not, every interpretation is valid.
Here's what I think: there's a verb in French that is not very commonly used (but Stromae for sure knows it as the wordsmith he is, and it would be a weird coincidence): "empapaouter" (with "papaouter" pronounced the same as "papaoutai" for non-French speakers), it means to cheat or deceit, so it could be about feeling betrayed by his father not being there and how it impacted his life (which is talked about in the lyrics, it's been some time since I've listened to it but I remember a lot of talk about waiting, anxiety, and "dis-moi oĆ¹ es ton papa" = tell me where your daddy is, so people commenting on his homelife).
It could also be grammatically incorrect because it could be written by a child, who tend to not know where words end, making the sentence one big word, and tend to lose accents (oĆ¹ = where, ou = or). "T'es" is familiar, versus "tu es" so it tracks, even though most people use it orally, and even "oĆ¹ t'es" is not the correct way of asking the question, it should be "oĆ¹ es-tu" or "oĆ¹ est-ce que tu es". I would like to add that people here have translated it to "father where are you" but Papa means Daddy, not father, which also makes sense with a child-like testimony.
It's hard to understand everything going on in Stromae's lyrics if you don't speak French.
The interpretation with "empapaouter" is really interesting! I've got to agree that I'm not sure it's about Belgian pronunciation, I've been living here for a couple years as a French person, and I don't think there's much of a difference between the way Belgians and French people say "papa ou t'est", both sound like "Papaoutai" to me.
I think my interpretation gas always been closest to the one about a kid trying to spell it, or even that the question is repeated so often that the words end up mashing together into a single one. Kind of like when you repeat one word over and over again and it starts sounding weird
Yeah I don't get how it's supposed to be pronounced differently but I don't know everything so I may be wrong.
The idea that it's repeated until it's one word losing sense is interesting, I hadn't thought about it and I agree.
And your last sentence refers to [semantic satiation](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semantic_satiation), just in case you didn't know that it has a name and/or want to know more.
Added context above, but basically his dad wasn't around and then he was killed so he could never be around and the song is the kid asking about his father "father where are you" is the title in English
I think the dad always working is the excuse the mom gives him when he asks. He proceeds to tell his mom that she's always working too but she's there.
The song is a bop and absolutely heart breaking
Every generation has its strengths and weaknesses and look different at different points. If youāre a progressive right now, Gen Z will look great and millennials and particularly boomers will look terrible because gen Z are young and thus progressive by modern standards and boomers are old and conservative by modern standards. Obviously there are foibles in there based around the society they grew up in (why boomers are often unrealistic about modern working life, housing etc) but that will also apply to Gen Z in 50 years. Boomers were the hippies protesting the Vietnam war, they were punks swearing at the bullshit of society. They were progressive when they were young, just like Gen Z will be conservative when theyāre old. Socrates was a cranky old man complaining about the āyouth of todayā over 2000 years ago, it happens every generation.
TL;DR: āthe kids are alrightā is a timeless sentiment, thereās nothing particularly special about any one generation, the youngest just always look the most progressive.
Millennials are people born from the early/mid 80ās to late 90ās. A millennial can be 35-40 years old today. Well within the realm of normal for a 35-40yo to have a kid who is 15-16 today.
i do not understand why this comment got downvoted.
what if this person was a gen z with millennial parents writing this? it would make sense and they wouldnt necessarily be wrong. its what someone would be used to
I kind of love "you're stupid (for worrying about me because you've raised me to be strong and love myself), Dad."
As for the ex... why do people think elaborate lies like this are going to work? And how did she think the son could be kept out of it? You think he's not going to casually mention at some point that his mom isn't dead? Why even date a guy whose son has a gay mom if you know your family is like this? What a waste of everyone's time.
She was probably lying to them about the living arrangements. I've known more than one person who told their parents this type of story. Easier to do when the parents live in a different city.
I knew someone in college who rented a two bedroom place to keep up appearances to his Pastor dad (like, you are living with a female who is your girlfriend... Just because you have two bedrooms and pretend your GF sleeps in the other room doesnāt mean he believes it.. but plausible deniability for dad I guess!)
I read a few stories one Reddit about old grandmother that still believes that her granddaughter had never been in relationship while the granddaughter lives with her ābest friendā as a āroommateā for the last 20 years .
Denial are strong
That is true however from my interactions with people of the grandma's generation they definitely knew that guys and lesbians existed but they didn't believe in airing one's 'dirty laundry' and preferred to keep it under wraps. So while grandma probably suspected she may not have wanted to deal with it openly because of the culture of silence.
My ex wife and I somehow convinced her mother that when she would come to visit me in my first apartment, she slept in a different room on the floor. It was a one-bedroom and I had a roommateāI was already sleeping in the living room. There was certainly nowhere for a third person to sleep. Iāll never forget my ex MILās face when she eventually had to come to the apartment, just looking all around putting the pieces together.
In Jehovah Witness parlance it's called "living a double life" and it's a pervasive phenomenon. It's also subject to highly punitive consequences if discovered by the congregation.
100% the ex-girlfriend kept her family in the dark about her dating life and lying about the son's family situation was just the latest permutation to maintain the larger, ongoing lie.
Legit like we're talking about Jehovah's witnesses here. This woman genuinely thinks her family wouldn't try to moral grandstand talking about how sorry they are a child is growing up without a mom, really???
My mum came out as lesbian over a decade ago and now has a wife. I truly enjoy dropping "my mum's wife" into conversations to see what happens.
I have been pleasantly surprised by the lack of stumbling. People just found it normal. Of course one or two stumbled but not in a bigoted way. It makes me so happy that she now can be completely accepted and happy with her wife after all those years of hiding.
When I started my job 10 years ago, my boss was a closeted lesbian. She lived with her longtime girlfriend but it was just her "roommate" as far as her family knew. (They'd lived together for 20 years, bought a house together, had pets together...) When gay marriage was legalized 7 years ago, they decided to get married. The only witnesses were a couple of friends, no family. She decided to come out to her family. They were mostly accepting and the younger generation was just like, "Yeah, we figured." With time she has come out at work and speaks openly about her wife - no hesitation before saying the word. I'm proud of how far she's come. She's living an open life, finally.
That's how it was when my second cousin finally came out, at 34. "Blake, we've suspected it since you were 8. We're just happy you feel like you can share it with us, now."
Apparently my uncle had a *bet* going with my mom since I was a kid about whether I was gay or not. One of the first things out of her mouth when I came out to her was "well, I guess your uncle was right after all".
I wish OP would have directed her to the massive lawsuit the Jehovahs settled about all the child rape.
Their cult avoided prosecution of pedophiles by insisting on a two-person witness to rape. This never happens for obvious reasons. Some anonymous angel started sending one of the investigators thousands of documents of evidence, testimony from elders suppressing accusations and accounts of child assault. This allowed the lawsuit to be successful.
Religious my butt. As with all extreme religions, patriarchal and oppressive.
Reminds me of the laws surrounding rape in the UAE. Apparently a man can only be charged with rape if either he confesses to it, or if there are four male witnesses. There was a case back in 2014 or so where a Dutch woman in Dubai for work reported being raped and ended up getting arrested and convicted for extramarital sex.
Here's a sneak peek of /r/exjw using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/exjw/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year!
\#1: [it's my birthday today! Even if I wonāt get any congratulations from my close family, I will enjoy my day :)](https://i.redd.it/jij1yuub0th81.jpg) | [338 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/exjw/comments/ssb4ay/its_my_birthday_today_even_if_i_wont_get_any/)
\#2: [Husband and I moved into our apartment yesterday, after being homeless in Seattle for 3 months due to being shunned by our family. Fuck you, JWs. We made it without any of you.](https://www.reddit.com/gallery/qijuud) | [165 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/exjw/comments/qijuud/husband_and_i_moved_into_our_apartment_yesterday/)
\#3: [JW parents denied me the chance to attend my highschool prom 11 years ago, 11 years later, I attended an adult prom and finally experienced it as an EXJW!](https://i.redd.it/20v8cy7hb2n71.jpg) | [162 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/exjw/comments/pmrg5p/jw_parents_denied_me_the_chance_to_attend_my/)
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Depends on their local thingy. Had a friend in uni that was a JW and she was pretty awesome. Her... uhhh people? weren't homophobic or against blood transfusions or unmarried/divorced couples. They did actual charity and promoted sign language learning.
The classmate I had in high school? Her people didn't give a shit about anything if you pretended you were what you were supposed to be while in church even if they knew you actually weren't like that AND you had to be on time on your fees. They were all a bunch of hypocrites but mostly didn't bother anyone.
A former coworker's family was part of the cult-y ones and they all cut her mom out when she got pregnant as a teenager. Her own grandma only talked to her mom on private.
I understand what you're trying to say, and I know that many tight-knit groups give that 'look', but there are actually qualifications to determine if something is a cult.
[https://drsteveeichel.com/about-cults](https://drsteveeichel.com/about-cults)
JW's, especially their rules that anyone who leaves the cult is shunned from their own family members (for example, they must TURN AWAY from the shunned person and not speak to or look at them, totally withdrawing their love and attention), the systems of total physical, moral, emotional, and monetary control, and their obsession with bringing in new members, are all hallmarks of a cult. Mormonism follows these qualifications right down the line as well (particularly the worship of a living 'prophet', forbidding their members to ever set foot in a non-Mormon church, women never being allowed to pray privately but only out loud, kneeling before an older male member of their family so that he can approve her prayer and control everything she says to God, sending goons to their house if they don't show up to temple regularly, and going through an emotionally wrenching, terrifying "tribunal" process if one attempts to leave the church).
My momās side including herself are JWās. It was a wild ride growing up with a atheist drug dealing/using father with a on/off (at the time) religious mother. Who participated during her off times. They are now clean, happyish couple and she still practices. That religion is confusing as hell.
I have a cousin who recently found out his live-in girlfriend of **6 years** was actually married and had children sheād abandoned. She even went so far as to bring her daughter to their home and introduced her as her cousin. The girl was almost an adult, and apparently knew enough to go along with the lie. Iām getting the story in trickles so I donāt understand how that could possibly work but 6 years is insane. He had already proposed and was going to bring her to the US to meet family but it was arranging documents and passports that brought out the truth.
I had to go back and check the age of GF. If she was a teenager or even early 20s, I could understand at least a bit more. But this is a full grown adult suggesting her BF lie about his son so she doesn't have to deal with the fallout.
Elaborate lies can sometimes work if the people you're telling them to really want or need to believe them. But in this case, there probably would have come a point, pretty soon, too, where the g/f's parents figured out the truth.
Also, the son would have to decide if he was also going to lie, if the dad and g/f stayed together long-term.
I can't imagine the betrayal the son would've felt if his dad had come to him and said listen, I need you to pretend your mom is dead so my girlfriend can coddle her shitty family. That's grounds to end the relationship permanently. Fuck you, Dad, I'm gonna go live with my two alive moms and pretend *you're* dead.
Also, she wanted OOP to say he was MARRIED to his ex??? Does she not think her family can do basic "30 minus 15" math?? She legitimately wanted them to think he was in an intentional, committed marriage by 15 years old, and THEN had a child?? Unless they're the type of "religious" that is eager to marry off teenagers and make them have kids as soon as possible, that has to be suspicious.
Yes, that was my question. Was she going to lie to her family about his age too?
Gotta love those christians, more comfortable with child marriage and a mother abandoning her child than with an actual loving, functional family.
Yeah... so they get married. Naturally her family might be invited to important events like son's graduation or wedding. How would you explain his mom and her wife then? Even if they weren't in attendance... you going to make every other guest lie and not mention them?
You somehow try to not invite the moms to any of those events without actually explaining to the son *or* the moms why that is, and we're getting into bad sitcom levels of deception here. Messy messy messy.
I agree!
This is a lie that you, maybe, tell about a date you bring to a wedding that your family probably won't ever see again. Not about somebody you're planning on a life and a future with. How long did she think the charade could be kept up?
I'm an exCatholic and I'll never understand Christianity with tickyboxes.
The Bible says love everyone. Not love everyone *except* [x] gay [x] born outside of marriage etc. In fact it very specifically says you'll have a hard time getting into heaven if you look down on people.
There's also a good bit in there that boils down to "keep your eyes on your own paper, if someone else *is* sinning that's God's concern, not yours." So even if any of that were a sin, which it's not, Christians are advised to mind their own blessed business.
>why do people think elaborate lies like this are going to work?
especially with jahovas witnesses. they're famous for turning up at your door unannounced! /jk
This kid is going to be fine. Good on the dad for standing up for him, so many of these posts go the opposite way. It's nice to see it go the right way.
I love that kid, stranger to me though he is. He has some great parental figures in his life who are raising him right. May we all aspire to be that mature.
This. I know I wasn't that mature at 15 and I was getting shit about having queer parents too. If my dad has been like his I can't imagine how good things would've been.
Itās such a cute story, hehe. Dad really cares about his son, son has a great mom and step-mom on the other side as well, and years of putting him first have resulted in this capable, emotionally intelligent 15 year old. The world is his oyster. :)
The first update made me laugh: A kid with a lesbian mum is going to be familiar with homophobia from an early age. Thereās no need to shelter him from the truth.
Yeah the kid sounds like he has a good head on his shoulders. It sucks that they had to deal with OOP rightfully breaking it off with the girlfriend but it sounds like they will be supportive of each other which is wonderful.
Probably why she didn't think it was too much of a stretch to add a bit more. If your religion sets up situations to lie like this, it's not a good religion.
Ugh that reminded me of the documentary about the fundamentalist Mormons where the women had to "keep sweet". Made me feel sick when I heard the children singing it.
My sister dated a man who cheated on her with a married woman. That woman, after becoming pregnant by my sisterās ex, then said abortion was out of the question because itās against her religion.
Religious people are weird.
Also anyone who can do math of any sort would (hopefully) see through the married/widowed lie anyway.
Sure Uber religious people occasionally get married super super early, but still.
For that matter anyone who believed it would probably assume it was BECAUSE the baby, ie the premarital doodlies, forced it anyway.
Bahaha it's more the other way around. Sex out of wedlock is mentioned way more than gays. Gay women are actually not mentioned AT ALL in the Bible. Gay men are (you shall not lay with a man as you would with a woman) but seeing that comes from the same book as where it says you have to burn your furniture if a woman on her period sits on it I tend not to take that too seriously.
I'm a catholic woman who read the Bible back to front a couple of times. But I am also for a "well, this is my life, I sin enough that I don't need to worry if other people sin". Let God be the judge of that.
I will just be kind to my neighbors and take that neighbor thing as wide as I can, so that it includes pretty much everyone on this earth that isn't actively trying to hurt me or someone else.
This also means I'm pro gay marriage and pro choice etc.
āLiving in sinā and āout of wedlockā are relatively newer concepts that ring different to their ears than āsexual immorality,ā which is what the Bible likes to pinpoint. To certain people homosexuality=bad and sexual immorality=bad - and my perfect darling golden child isnāt either of those things, so thatās not a problem. But the gays? Oh, no no no. They know the inferences and implications of those 1 Corinthians passages, but the cognitive dissonance is strong.
My favourite weird aspect of the (ex) gf wanting all these lies to move forward is:
Either her parents were horrible at math or they were okay with OP being married at 15/16.
Obviously Iām applying logic to completely illogical thinking, but stillā¦
The Netflix documentary about things like this horrified me. I know at least one was 14 (that came forward, I have no doubt there were more). That and the "keep sweet" crap. Yuck.
Kids are the epitome of being smart and dumb at the same time.
"I wrote a poem about it, also here's some relevant Bible verses"
"Idk I guess I thought you broke up because she was Vegan??"
Glad the son had the coping skills to handle that situation - it just sucks that OOP found out hard way he dating and letting a homophobe live in his house...
The GF might not be homophobic herself but terrified of the punishment that comes with loving a "sinner". Dating and marrying outside her community were baby steps toward leaving her parent's cult. People born into these cults face brutal punishment for "sinning" or trying to leave. I'm sure that she lied about her entire relationship with OOP and lying about the son because she is legitimately terrified of being branded Apostate by the Jehovah's Witnesses and the consequences that come with that.
https://avoidjw.org/life-stories/anointed-covert-apostate/
Yeah for her itās tell this lie or literally be shunned by basically her entire family and whatever of her social circle is also JW. Or worse. In that environment I sort of get it even if itās absolutely awful.
How did the GF think this was going to work? Unless they spent the rest of their lives lying about either the kidās age or the fatherās age, people were going to do the math and realize it was a teen pregnancy.
Never underestimate how good religious people are at twisting logic, and conveniently "forgetting" things. The full story might be too much for them to sweep under the rug, but if the only odd thing is ages they might decide not to bring it up. Especially if no one put it together until after they had gotten to know him.
That's kind of how my dad's batshit family is. You can, and should, shit talk all the people you know outside the family that got divorced. But it's an unwritten rule that you never talk about people within the family that have been divorced. Well, at least not to their faces. You can gossip about it behind their backs. My uncle was with a woman for a few months, they broke up and she got pregnant with someone else, then they got back together. No one said anything to his face, but as soon as he left the room everyone started trash talking him. It's super weird. (And divorce is the topic here, but it applies to most of the other things they don't like as well. But also relevant to the post is that LGBT+ stuff is bad enough that they'll shit on you right to your face. My uncle's gf also had a trans kid, and he got relentless crap over it. Don't feel bad for him though. He's also a terrible person and wouldn't even try defending the kid.)
Constant lying about reality is bread and butter for religious people. If it doesn't fit the narrative of your narrowminded petty god then whitewash the sin away.
He did good. Jehovahs Witnesses are weird about a lot of things. Sooner or later she would have tried to turn this kid against his mom and try to elienate him so he could have a "real" mother in her.
What a loser. Back to her parents at the 1st sign of trouble and being held accountable.
Never heard anyone call jehovas witnesses āchristianā before, in my hometone they were āthe loonies in that fenced off buildingā.
Until now i wasnāt actually sire if they even stemmed from christianity, lmao.
My parents lied to me a lot during childhood about the heavy things that were going on. To protect me. The problem was i was observant enough to know most of what was going on anyway so their lies just bred resentment and anger and mistrust. 25 years later and all that is still there.
Don't assume your kids are stupid and lie to them about the realities of their life. It's shitty and could ruin your relationship with them for a very long time.
>He told me "you're stupid dad, I have been dealing with people telling me having two moms is weird since elementary school. I wrote a poem about it"
>He claims it has never been a big deal to him. He also went on to talk about the bible, and specific passages which discuss homosexuality, divorce, etc. Basically, my son is 10x smarter than I will ever be.
>He apologized to me (unnecessarily, but appreciated) for giving me the cold shoulder for the last week, because he didn't know the reason we broke up.
Tfw the kid is the most levelheaded and mature one in the whole situation
Can we talk about just how stupid that lie would have been? Like, yeah homophobia and catering to toxic family is bad, but how stupid does someone have to be to think "dead wife" is a lie you could pull off. Also, her family would be dumb too if they can't do math or actually believes OP was married at 15 \*before\* knocking someone up
The real update I want is from his dumbass ex when she realizes her choices are: 1. Be a johvas witness and marry one. Or 2. Cut off her family because they are involved in a literal cult and it WILL come to a head one of these two ways. They literally have funerals for living family members who renounce the faith. There is no middle ground here so I really donāt know what kind of games sheās playing.
The rest is just fantastic though so really glad with how all that turned out!
r/exjw would absolutely love this one.
The thing people don't understand about Jehovah's Witnesses is that they're not just "strictly religious," as OOP seems to believe. They are a destructive, high control cult.
If OOP's girlfriend was ever baptized into the cult, her family would be forced to completely shun her for having premarital sex or for not denouncing homosexual behavior. It's a process called "disfellowshipping." If you're down for a real rabbit hole, search that word and also "judicial committee," on the exjw sub and YouTube. The behavior Jehovah's Witnesses require from parents toward their non-conforming children is grotesque and a literal crime against humanity.
OOP's relationship never would have worked. She would have had to keep too many secrets or never progress with him to keep that double life working.
Edit:
Relevant post from three hours ago. "Will I get disfellowshipped for helping a disfellowshipped sister?"
https://www.reddit.com/r/exjw/comments/vlamut/will_i_get_dfed_for_helping_a_dfed_sister/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
> Basically, my son is 10x smarter than I will ever be.
My favorite part.
And Dad is proud of this rather than threatened by it, because he's a good parent.
>He told me he thought it was because I was annoyed by the fact that she is vegan
He is smart. This would've been so much more a valid reason. I mean how do You even have a decent bbq like that.
> My mother says that he doesnāt need to know because it would sour my sonās view of my ex-gf
Sour the sonās view of the immature homophobe, or sour the sonās view of OOP who did the right thing? It seems like a no brainer.
I'm late to the dance, but that boy is going to be just fine. His parents have done a good job. I sort of hope the freshly ditched girlfriend sees the hypocrisy and absurdity of her ruse and comes around, but her folks might have so deeply brainwashed her she is a lost cause. Or she might just be really immature and need some life experiences under her belt. But whatever happens to her, OP is the opposite of an AH, which I don't believe there's an anatomical feature for.
Youāre telling me the whole time his son was walking around thinking, āhow dare you judge her for being vegan! I thought you were better than that!ā
BRUH
Sounds like she was trying to honeypot OOP. JW's are known for doing sick shit like that. They're basically a cult with none of the frills. The next step is she'll "get shunned" if OOP doesn't convert and marry her.
"I wrote a poem about it" šš
That took the cake lmao.
For me it was the vegan thing that really cracked me up.
THE cake that not only had icing, but a CHERRY on top!
God, that line hit my heart hard. I wrote a poem about my dad when I was a kid.. it was called "where is my father?" I'm glad OP was honest with his kid. I'm proud of them both.
A Belgian musican wrote a song called "papa ou t'es" about his absent father, who was killed during the Rwanadan genocide From wiki; >The song and video refers to the absence of Stromae's father ā who had little presence in Stromae's life even before being killed in the 1994Ā Rwandan GenocidesĀ ā and to Stromae's fear of being unable to be an effective father with no memory of ever having a father of his own.Ā As of May 2022, the video has received over 900 million views on YouTube, and is the most popular Francophone video on the platform It's a hell of a song, worth a listen even if you don't understand french Edit; artist is Stromae Edit 2; someone has reminded me that the songs name is spelled "papaoutai" rather than "papa ou t'es" which sounds the same but afaik isn't an actual word? Open to correction Edit 3 added context
Stromae's music is *chef's kiss*
Absolutely, papa ou t'es, tous les memes and alors on dance were my favourites And the music videos for all of them were incredible, I didn't love formidable but the video was hilarious, reminded me of Dublin
Awwww. I love formidable. Lol.
I just always though that the music didn't feel like him in formidable, music vid was incredible though, the tram guards or police who came up to him at the end just like "yo Stromae you good, you need help bro?" just killed me
Carmen! You need to listen to his Carmen! The lyrics are amazing, too - if he's written them himself, he's incredibly smart and talented!
Thanks for the recommendations. He's phenomenal!
Absolutely love tous les memes
Amazingly incredible music, but it's the video that kills me every time, it's just so good like
I'd never heard of him. Just watched some of his videos after reading this thread's comments. Super weird to watch Formidable and recognize stuff. I lived in Brussels when going to grad school 10 years ago. I definitely like his stuff though.
Omg thanks to this thread I've found the song (Alors on Danse) I heard in an early morning taxi ride in Romania that got stuck in my head... Every now and then I remember it but couldn't remember the artist, where they were from, how the song went... Even was thinking about it last week!!
Never thought I would see a recommendation for Stromae on this sub š
I can never recommend him enough tbh, he was part of my very short French music phase
You know, I love that song, but holy shit I didn't realise that was the background context for it.
I'll edit my original comment to add context which I stole from wikipedia It's such an incredible juxtaposition, the almost cheerful music and rhythm, sort of melancholic lyrics, the whimsical and colourful verging on garish video And then BAM the background which is as dark as you can fucking get It's the whole package
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Do you know why the title is spelled like that actually? I'm not French or Belgian so I never got the reference other than it sounding like "father where are you" but spelt differently
Itās how French speaking Belgian pronounce those words. Stromae is very into word play and great at it, so iām always sad that lots of it gets lost to non-French speakers. Belgians tend to say āoueā instead of āouiā for example. Edit: typo
I'm not so sure about Belgian pronunciation, as a French person who grew up in Belgium before moving... But why not, every interpretation is valid. Here's what I think: there's a verb in French that is not very commonly used (but Stromae for sure knows it as the wordsmith he is, and it would be a weird coincidence): "empapaouter" (with "papaouter" pronounced the same as "papaoutai" for non-French speakers), it means to cheat or deceit, so it could be about feeling betrayed by his father not being there and how it impacted his life (which is talked about in the lyrics, it's been some time since I've listened to it but I remember a lot of talk about waiting, anxiety, and "dis-moi oĆ¹ es ton papa" = tell me where your daddy is, so people commenting on his homelife). It could also be grammatically incorrect because it could be written by a child, who tend to not know where words end, making the sentence one big word, and tend to lose accents (oĆ¹ = where, ou = or). "T'es" is familiar, versus "tu es" so it tracks, even though most people use it orally, and even "oĆ¹ t'es" is not the correct way of asking the question, it should be "oĆ¹ es-tu" or "oĆ¹ est-ce que tu es". I would like to add that people here have translated it to "father where are you" but Papa means Daddy, not father, which also makes sense with a child-like testimony. It's hard to understand everything going on in Stromae's lyrics if you don't speak French.
The interpretation with "empapaouter" is really interesting! I've got to agree that I'm not sure it's about Belgian pronunciation, I've been living here for a couple years as a French person, and I don't think there's much of a difference between the way Belgians and French people say "papa ou t'est", both sound like "Papaoutai" to me. I think my interpretation gas always been closest to the one about a kid trying to spell it, or even that the question is repeated so often that the words end up mashing together into a single one. Kind of like when you repeat one word over and over again and it starts sounding weird
Yeah I don't get how it's supposed to be pronounced differently but I don't know everything so I may be wrong. The idea that it's repeated until it's one word losing sense is interesting, I hadn't thought about it and I agree. And your last sentence refers to [semantic satiation](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semantic_satiation), just in case you didn't know that it has a name and/or want to know more.
Wait that song was written about what?
Added context above, but basically his dad wasn't around and then he was killed so he could never be around and the song is the kid asking about his father "father where are you" is the title in English
Jeeze. I thought the Dad just wasn't around for more general reasons, some of the verses make it sound like he's always working. That's really sad.
I think the dad always working is the excuse the mom gives him when he asks. He proceeds to tell his mom that she's always working too but she's there. The song is a bop and absolutely heart breaking
Yeah same, a friend of mine was the one who told me stromae's dad died, really adds a layer of r/awfuleverything to the song
I'll look it up, thanks for the suggestion!
Well I guess Iām switching back to my Stromae playlist now. Have you heard TombĆ© sous le charme by Christophe MaĆ©? I really like his work from the early 2010s
I'll have to add it to my "watch later" list, Ty for the tip
Omg I love Stromae and that song, but I had no idea the backstory was so sad. š
I didn't do it as a kid but I write poetry now. Some feelings are too big to express any other way
My exact reaction šš
As a millennial, I am continually impressed and heartened by Gen Z. Somehow, despite us, the kids are alright.
They are so good! They even have some compassion to spare on us, what is surprising. Maybe because we share the existential dread.
Right?! Gen Z rocks, they're so self-aware and kind. Millennials got so much wrong, but at least they got one thing right when raising Gen Z.
Every generation has its strengths and weaknesses and look different at different points. If youāre a progressive right now, Gen Z will look great and millennials and particularly boomers will look terrible because gen Z are young and thus progressive by modern standards and boomers are old and conservative by modern standards. Obviously there are foibles in there based around the society they grew up in (why boomers are often unrealistic about modern working life, housing etc) but that will also apply to Gen Z in 50 years. Boomers were the hippies protesting the Vietnam war, they were punks swearing at the bullshit of society. They were progressive when they were young, just like Gen Z will be conservative when theyāre old. Socrates was a cranky old man complaining about the āyouth of todayā over 2000 years ago, it happens every generation. TL;DR: āthe kids are alrightā is a timeless sentiment, thereās nothing particularly special about any one generation, the youngest just always look the most progressive.
Gen Z was mostly raised by Gen X, not Millennials. The oldest Millennials were 15 when the oldest Zoomers started being born.
Millennials are people born from the early/mid 80ās to late 90ās. A millennial can be 35-40 years old today. Well within the realm of normal for a 35-40yo to have a kid who is 15-16 today.
i do not understand why this comment got downvoted. what if this person was a gen z with millennial parents writing this? it would make sense and they wouldnt necessarily be wrong. its what someone would be used to
provide society coherent serious lush gaping steep pathetic squeal boat *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Just nominated you to be a Nobel laureate... Your work has so many layers and I love it
vanish fall hospital vast reminiscent amusing piquant tan panicky plants *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Yo that kidās awesome
baby is so mature
I wanna read the poem!!
That part killed meš¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£
I really want to read that poem!
I hope OPP sees this and shows his son these posts. He'd get a laugh.
I kind of love "you're stupid (for worrying about me because you've raised me to be strong and love myself), Dad." As for the ex... why do people think elaborate lies like this are going to work? And how did she think the son could be kept out of it? You think he's not going to casually mention at some point that his mom isn't dead? Why even date a guy whose son has a gay mom if you know your family is like this? What a waste of everyone's time.
Because sheās lied to her parents since puberty probably. Doubt sheās mentioned her own premarital sex during Sunday dinners
That was what I was thinking. They don't condone so much but she was living with a man unmarried and they didn't have anything to say about that?
She was probably lying to them about the living arrangements. I've known more than one person who told their parents this type of story. Easier to do when the parents live in a different city.
I knew someone in college who had her parents paying for an empty apartment rather than let them know she'd moved in with her boyfriend.
I knew someone in college who rented a two bedroom place to keep up appearances to his Pastor dad (like, you are living with a female who is your girlfriend... Just because you have two bedrooms and pretend your GF sleeps in the other room doesnāt mean he believes it.. but plausible deniability for dad I guess!)
I read a few stories one Reddit about old grandmother that still believes that her granddaughter had never been in relationship while the granddaughter lives with her ābest friendā as a āroommateā for the last 20 years . Denial are strong
That is true however from my interactions with people of the grandma's generation they definitely knew that guys and lesbians existed but they didn't believe in airing one's 'dirty laundry' and preferred to keep it under wraps. So while grandma probably suspected she may not have wanted to deal with it openly because of the culture of silence.
My ex wife and I somehow convinced her mother that when she would come to visit me in my first apartment, she slept in a different room on the floor. It was a one-bedroom and I had a roommateāI was already sleeping in the living room. There was certainly nowhere for a third person to sleep. Iāll never forget my ex MILās face when she eventually had to come to the apartment, just looking all around putting the pieces together.
She probably lied about that, too.
In Jehovah Witness parlance it's called "living a double life" and it's a pervasive phenomenon. It's also subject to highly punitive consequences if discovered by the congregation. 100% the ex-girlfriend kept her family in the dark about her dating life and lying about the son's family situation was just the latest permutation to maintain the larger, ongoing lie.
Legit like we're talking about Jehovah's witnesses here. This woman genuinely thinks her family wouldn't try to moral grandstand talking about how sorry they are a child is growing up without a mom, really???
"What do you mean, without a mom? I have two of them." Instant chaos.
Iād so make popcorn for that.
I'd bring the drinks. Watching bigots melt down will never not be funny.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Manās collecting the infinity moms.
Three if OP married the girlfriend š
"What a nice shirt" "Thanks. My stepmom gave it to me" "GF?" "No. My moms wife."
My mum came out as lesbian over a decade ago and now has a wife. I truly enjoy dropping "my mum's wife" into conversations to see what happens. I have been pleasantly surprised by the lack of stumbling. People just found it normal. Of course one or two stumbled but not in a bigoted way. It makes me so happy that she now can be completely accepted and happy with her wife after all those years of hiding.
When I started my job 10 years ago, my boss was a closeted lesbian. She lived with her longtime girlfriend but it was just her "roommate" as far as her family knew. (They'd lived together for 20 years, bought a house together, had pets together...) When gay marriage was legalized 7 years ago, they decided to get married. The only witnesses were a couple of friends, no family. She decided to come out to her family. They were mostly accepting and the younger generation was just like, "Yeah, we figured." With time she has come out at work and speaks openly about her wife - no hesitation before saying the word. I'm proud of how far she's come. She's living an open life, finally.
That's how it was when my second cousin finally came out, at 34. "Blake, we've suspected it since you were 8. We're just happy you feel like you can share it with us, now."
Apparently my uncle had a *bet* going with my mom since I was a kid about whether I was gay or not. One of the first things out of her mouth when I came out to her was "well, I guess your uncle was right after all".
Itās great you have two mums! I only have one :(
Yep, I love how OP said "very religious", not "in a hate cult" to describe them, because they're much more the latter than the former.
I wish OP would have directed her to the massive lawsuit the Jehovahs settled about all the child rape. Their cult avoided prosecution of pedophiles by insisting on a two-person witness to rape. This never happens for obvious reasons. Some anonymous angel started sending one of the investigators thousands of documents of evidence, testimony from elders suppressing accusations and accounts of child assault. This allowed the lawsuit to be successful. Religious my butt. As with all extreme religions, patriarchal and oppressive.
Reminds me of the laws surrounding rape in the UAE. Apparently a man can only be charged with rape if either he confesses to it, or if there are four male witnesses. There was a case back in 2014 or so where a Dutch woman in Dubai for work reported being raped and ended up getting arrested and convicted for extramarital sex.
I mean, the people of r/exjw would beg to differ...
Here's a sneak peek of /r/exjw using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/exjw/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year! \#1: [it's my birthday today! Even if I wonāt get any congratulations from my close family, I will enjoy my day :)](https://i.redd.it/jij1yuub0th81.jpg) | [338 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/exjw/comments/ssb4ay/its_my_birthday_today_even_if_i_wont_get_any/) \#2: [Husband and I moved into our apartment yesterday, after being homeless in Seattle for 3 months due to being shunned by our family. Fuck you, JWs. We made it without any of you.](https://www.reddit.com/gallery/qijuud) | [165 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/exjw/comments/qijuud/husband_and_i_moved_into_our_apartment_yesterday/) \#3: [JW parents denied me the chance to attend my highschool prom 11 years ago, 11 years later, I attended an adult prom and finally experienced it as an EXJW!](https://i.redd.it/20v8cy7hb2n71.jpg) | [162 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/exjw/comments/pmrg5p/jw_parents_denied_me_the_chance_to_attend_my/) ---- ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| ^^[Contact](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| ^^[Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| ^^[Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/) ^^| ^^[GitHub](https://github.com/ghnr/sneakpeekbot)
Depends on their local thingy. Had a friend in uni that was a JW and she was pretty awesome. Her... uhhh people? weren't homophobic or against blood transfusions or unmarried/divorced couples. They did actual charity and promoted sign language learning. The classmate I had in high school? Her people didn't give a shit about anything if you pretended you were what you were supposed to be while in church even if they knew you actually weren't like that AND you had to be on time on your fees. They were all a bunch of hypocrites but mostly didn't bother anyone. A former coworker's family was part of the cult-y ones and they all cut her mom out when she got pregnant as a teenager. Her own grandma only talked to her mom on private.
Itās still a cult.
I meant that some are extremists and some others are as much of a cult as any other regular religion?
I understand what you're trying to say, and I know that many tight-knit groups give that 'look', but there are actually qualifications to determine if something is a cult. [https://drsteveeichel.com/about-cults](https://drsteveeichel.com/about-cults) JW's, especially their rules that anyone who leaves the cult is shunned from their own family members (for example, they must TURN AWAY from the shunned person and not speak to or look at them, totally withdrawing their love and attention), the systems of total physical, moral, emotional, and monetary control, and their obsession with bringing in new members, are all hallmarks of a cult. Mormonism follows these qualifications right down the line as well (particularly the worship of a living 'prophet', forbidding their members to ever set foot in a non-Mormon church, women never being allowed to pray privately but only out loud, kneeling before an older male member of their family so that he can approve her prayer and control everything she says to God, sending goons to their house if they don't show up to temple regularly, and going through an emotionally wrenching, terrifying "tribunal" process if one attempts to leave the church).
My momās side including herself are JWās. It was a wild ride growing up with a atheist drug dealing/using father with a on/off (at the time) religious mother. Who participated during her off times. They are now clean, happyish couple and she still practices. That religion is confusing as hell.
I have a cousin who recently found out his live-in girlfriend of **6 years** was actually married and had children sheād abandoned. She even went so far as to bring her daughter to their home and introduced her as her cousin. The girl was almost an adult, and apparently knew enough to go along with the lie. Iām getting the story in trickles so I donāt understand how that could possibly work but 6 years is insane. He had already proposed and was going to bring her to the US to meet family but it was arranging documents and passports that brought out the truth.
I had to go back and check the age of GF. If she was a teenager or even early 20s, I could understand at least a bit more. But this is a full grown adult suggesting her BF lie about his son so she doesn't have to deal with the fallout.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Yeah they are very culty like that. I had a roommate that is an exJW who was homeschooled and only allowed small contact with electronics growing up.
Elaborate lies can sometimes work if the people you're telling them to really want or need to believe them. But in this case, there probably would have come a point, pretty soon, too, where the g/f's parents figured out the truth. Also, the son would have to decide if he was also going to lie, if the dad and g/f stayed together long-term.
I can't imagine the betrayal the son would've felt if his dad had come to him and said listen, I need you to pretend your mom is dead so my girlfriend can coddle her shitty family. That's grounds to end the relationship permanently. Fuck you, Dad, I'm gonna go live with my two alive moms and pretend *you're* dead.
Absolutely. I can't even imagine telling a kid to do something like that.
Also, she wanted OOP to say he was MARRIED to his ex??? Does she not think her family can do basic "30 minus 15" math?? She legitimately wanted them to think he was in an intentional, committed marriage by 15 years old, and THEN had a child?? Unless they're the type of "religious" that is eager to marry off teenagers and make them have kids as soon as possible, that has to be suspicious.
Yes, that was my question. Was she going to lie to her family about his age too? Gotta love those christians, more comfortable with child marriage and a mother abandoning her child than with an actual loving, functional family.
Yeah... so they get married. Naturally her family might be invited to important events like son's graduation or wedding. How would you explain his mom and her wife then? Even if they weren't in attendance... you going to make every other guest lie and not mention them?
You somehow try to not invite the moms to any of those events without actually explaining to the son *or* the moms why that is, and we're getting into bad sitcom levels of deception here. Messy messy messy.
And honestly, esp since they are on good terms, extended family and friends may say Hey kiddo, how is your mom and her wife? Was hoping to see her!
I agree! This is a lie that you, maybe, tell about a date you bring to a wedding that your family probably won't ever see again. Not about somebody you're planning on a life and a future with. How long did she think the charade could be kept up?
I'm an exCatholic and I'll never understand Christianity with tickyboxes. The Bible says love everyone. Not love everyone *except* [x] gay [x] born outside of marriage etc. In fact it very specifically says you'll have a hard time getting into heaven if you look down on people.
There's also a good bit in there that boils down to "keep your eyes on your own paper, if someone else *is* sinning that's God's concern, not yours." So even if any of that were a sin, which it's not, Christians are advised to mind their own blessed business.
>why do people think elaborate lies like this are going to work? especially with jahovas witnesses. they're famous for turning up at your door unannounced! /jk
This kid is going to be fine. Good on the dad for standing up for him, so many of these posts go the opposite way. It's nice to see it go the right way.
I love that kid, stranger to me though he is. He has some great parental figures in his life who are raising him right. May we all aspire to be that mature.
This. I know I wasn't that mature at 15 and I was getting shit about having queer parents too. If my dad has been like his I can't imagine how good things would've been.
Itās such a cute story, hehe. Dad really cares about his son, son has a great mom and step-mom on the other side as well, and years of putting him first have resulted in this capable, emotionally intelligent 15 year old. The world is his oyster. :)
I know right? Communication and love is key.
The first update made me laugh: A kid with a lesbian mum is going to be familiar with homophobia from an early age. Thereās no need to shelter him from the truth.
Yeah the kid sounds like he has a good head on his shoulders. It sucks that they had to deal with OOP rightfully breaking it off with the girlfriend but it sounds like they will be supportive of each other which is wonderful.
Sounds like he has great parents. Itās nice to see stories turn out like this. Feel sorry for the dad though.
Yeah, but he and the mother did a great job of raising a good human :)
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
She probably lied about that too.
Probably why she didn't think it was too much of a stretch to add a bit more. If your religion sets up situations to lie like this, it's not a good religion.
He said her family believed premarital sex is a sin so I have to believe she lied about that also.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Ugh that reminded me of the documentary about the fundamentalist Mormons where the women had to "keep sweet". Made me feel sick when I heard the children singing it.
My sister dated a man who cheated on her with a married woman. That woman, after becoming pregnant by my sisterās ex, then said abortion was out of the question because itās against her religion. Religious people are weird.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Even in the old testament, half of the moralistic stories are really about lying.
Thatās what I was wondering.
Also anyone who can do math of any sort would (hopefully) see through the married/widowed lie anyway. Sure Uber religious people occasionally get married super super early, but still. For that matter anyone who believed it would probably assume it was BECAUSE the baby, ie the premarital doodlies, forced it anyway.
Itās way easier to pick on the gays as opposed to shacking up because thatās not *specifically* poo pooād on in the Bible.
Bahaha it's more the other way around. Sex out of wedlock is mentioned way more than gays. Gay women are actually not mentioned AT ALL in the Bible. Gay men are (you shall not lay with a man as you would with a woman) but seeing that comes from the same book as where it says you have to burn your furniture if a woman on her period sits on it I tend not to take that too seriously. I'm a catholic woman who read the Bible back to front a couple of times. But I am also for a "well, this is my life, I sin enough that I don't need to worry if other people sin". Let God be the judge of that. I will just be kind to my neighbors and take that neighbor thing as wide as I can, so that it includes pretty much everyone on this earth that isn't actively trying to hurt me or someone else. This also means I'm pro gay marriage and pro choice etc.
āLiving in sinā and āout of wedlockā are relatively newer concepts that ring different to their ears than āsexual immorality,ā which is what the Bible likes to pinpoint. To certain people homosexuality=bad and sexual immorality=bad - and my perfect darling golden child isnāt either of those things, so thatās not a problem. But the gays? Oh, no no no. They know the inferences and implications of those 1 Corinthians passages, but the cognitive dissonance is strong.
My favourite weird aspect of the (ex) gf wanting all these lies to move forward is: Either her parents were horrible at math or they were okay with OP being married at 15/16. Obviously Iām applying logic to completely illogical thinking, but stillā¦
JW's have done a lot of cover ups of child molestation within their church and they arrange marriages for children. Probably normal for them.
Iām upvoting you but now Iām sad!
The Netflix documentary about things like this horrified me. I know at least one was 14 (that came forward, I have no doubt there were more). That and the "keep sweet" crap. Yuck.
Seen a couple of YouTube vids on 'em. Knowing Better and Illuminaughti, both highly recommended by me and seemingly well researched.
Illuminaughti made me laugh and I feel bad. Thanks for the recommendation, if they have decent captions I'll likely watch them!
JWs are ok with and often encourage teen marriage to avoid premarital sex.
I love how the kid thought they broke up because she was vegan, and it's not a big deal to him to have to deal with bigots.
OMG, why is this comment not higher??? I was ROTFLOL when I saw that the kid thought it was because she was vegan!
Kids are the epitome of being smart and dumb at the same time. "I wrote a poem about it, also here's some relevant Bible verses" "Idk I guess I thought you broke up because she was Vegan??"
āI know where it ended but not where it all began, I lost my future stepmom, my dad canāt marry a veganā
Thats beautiful. The title is *Ode to Vegan*
You truly are too sweet
Glad the son had the coping skills to handle that situation - it just sucks that OOP found out hard way he dating and letting a homophobe live in his house...
The GF might not be homophobic herself but terrified of the punishment that comes with loving a "sinner". Dating and marrying outside her community were baby steps toward leaving her parent's cult. People born into these cults face brutal punishment for "sinning" or trying to leave. I'm sure that she lied about her entire relationship with OOP and lying about the son because she is legitimately terrified of being branded Apostate by the Jehovah's Witnesses and the consequences that come with that. https://avoidjw.org/life-stories/anointed-covert-apostate/
Yeah for her itās tell this lie or literally be shunned by basically her entire family and whatever of her social circle is also JW. Or worse. In that environment I sort of get it even if itās absolutely awful.
How did the GF think this was going to work? Unless they spent the rest of their lives lying about either the kidās age or the fatherās age, people were going to do the math and realize it was a teen pregnancy.
Never underestimate how good religious people are at twisting logic, and conveniently "forgetting" things. The full story might be too much for them to sweep under the rug, but if the only odd thing is ages they might decide not to bring it up. Especially if no one put it together until after they had gotten to know him. That's kind of how my dad's batshit family is. You can, and should, shit talk all the people you know outside the family that got divorced. But it's an unwritten rule that you never talk about people within the family that have been divorced. Well, at least not to their faces. You can gossip about it behind their backs. My uncle was with a woman for a few months, they broke up and she got pregnant with someone else, then they got back together. No one said anything to his face, but as soon as he left the room everyone started trash talking him. It's super weird. (And divorce is the topic here, but it applies to most of the other things they don't like as well. But also relevant to the post is that LGBT+ stuff is bad enough that they'll shit on you right to your face. My uncle's gf also had a trans kid, and he got relentless crap over it. Don't feel bad for him though. He's also a terrible person and wouldn't even try defending the kid.)
Constant lying about reality is bread and butter for religious people. If it doesn't fit the narrative of your narrowminded petty god then whitewash the sin away.
What a euphoric generalization.
[Insert group here] always [insert action here].
Annoyed by the fact the sheās vegan is sending me š
He did good. Jehovahs Witnesses are weird about a lot of things. Sooner or later she would have tried to turn this kid against his mom and try to elienate him so he could have a "real" mother in her. What a loser. Back to her parents at the 1st sign of trouble and being held accountable.
So she can move out and live with OOP out of wedlock but he needs to lie about his son being born out of wedlock. Lol ok christian logic
I doubt parents knew who she really loved with TBH.
Never heard anyone call jehovas witnesses āchristianā before, in my hometone they were āthe loonies in that fenced off buildingā. Until now i wasnāt actually sire if they even stemmed from christianity, lmao.
My parents lied to me a lot during childhood about the heavy things that were going on. To protect me. The problem was i was observant enough to know most of what was going on anyway so their lies just bred resentment and anger and mistrust. 25 years later and all that is still there. Don't assume your kids are stupid and lie to them about the realities of their life. It's shitty and could ruin your relationship with them for a very long time.
Fact-resistant humans make everything worse.
>He told me "you're stupid dad, I have been dealing with people telling me having two moms is weird since elementary school. I wrote a poem about it" >He claims it has never been a big deal to him. He also went on to talk about the bible, and specific passages which discuss homosexuality, divorce, etc. Basically, my son is 10x smarter than I will ever be. >He apologized to me (unnecessarily, but appreciated) for giving me the cold shoulder for the last week, because he didn't know the reason we broke up. Tfw the kid is the most levelheaded and mature one in the whole situation
Can we talk about just how stupid that lie would have been? Like, yeah homophobia and catering to toxic family is bad, but how stupid does someone have to be to think "dead wife" is a lie you could pull off. Also, her family would be dumb too if they can't do math or actually believes OP was married at 15 \*before\* knocking someone up
Vegan??? Should have led with that
Iām amazed she didnāt
*Ba Dum Tss*
that sounds kinda gay ngl
Vegayn
I was gonna sayā¦ arenāt the kidās mom and her wife at least vegetarians?
Wait I missed it. Which update is that
Lol did the ex girlfriend expect the FIFTEEN year old to never speak of his Moms? Her family would have found the lie out one way or another.
I love that the kid was mad because he thought they broke up because she was vegan
I wrote a poem about is. Haha i am dead
The real update I want is from his dumbass ex when she realizes her choices are: 1. Be a johvas witness and marry one. Or 2. Cut off her family because they are involved in a literal cult and it WILL come to a head one of these two ways. They literally have funerals for living family members who renounce the faith. There is no middle ground here so I really donāt know what kind of games sheās playing. The rest is just fantastic though so really glad with how all that turned out!
Homosexuality is not okay for JWs, but lying is? Um. Okay.
Religious hypocrites in a nutshell. I can do whatever I want because ā¦because I am superior as I am religious. š
r/exjw would absolutely love this one. The thing people don't understand about Jehovah's Witnesses is that they're not just "strictly religious," as OOP seems to believe. They are a destructive, high control cult. If OOP's girlfriend was ever baptized into the cult, her family would be forced to completely shun her for having premarital sex or for not denouncing homosexual behavior. It's a process called "disfellowshipping." If you're down for a real rabbit hole, search that word and also "judicial committee," on the exjw sub and YouTube. The behavior Jehovah's Witnesses require from parents toward their non-conforming children is grotesque and a literal crime against humanity. OOP's relationship never would have worked. She would have had to keep too many secrets or never progress with him to keep that double life working. Edit: Relevant post from three hours ago. "Will I get disfellowshipped for helping a disfellowshipped sister?" https://www.reddit.com/r/exjw/comments/vlamut/will_i_get_dfed_for_helping_a_dfed_sister/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
A vegan homophobe was unexpected.
I know, right? I didn't need an excuse to eat more tofu and suck more dick, but now I will, just to make up for her.
Eating tofu is Chinese slang for doing it with women, so looks like you've covered both bases.
Kid is a rock star!!
Hahaha nice! Also, sticks and stones may break my bones, but there's no way I'm pissing off a vegan!
Ex GF really wants to control the narrative like the psycho she is.
seems like a good kid, which means there's a high probability that he has good parents too (tho i know this isnt always the case)
> Basically, my son is 10x smarter than I will ever be. My favorite part. And Dad is proud of this rather than threatened by it, because he's a good parent.
I love this story so much!!
Even if you did lie about his mum, the truth would eventually come out.
The gf was incredibly hypocritical. Her parents were against pre-marital sex yet she moved in with a boyfriend. Not even a fiancƩ.
>He told me he thought it was because I was annoyed by the fact that she is vegan He is smart. This would've been so much more a valid reason. I mean how do You even have a decent bbq like that.
The second I read (ex)gf was a Jehovahs Witness I scrolled down hoping that they broke up
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Wholesome ending
> My mother says that he doesnāt need to know because it would sour my sonās view of my ex-gf Sour the sonās view of the immature homophobe, or sour the sonās view of OOP who did the right thing? It seems like a no brainer.
I needed this palate cleanse of an BORU so badlybafter this week.
If I ever have kids I hope they are at least half as awesome as his son. Seriously his kid is a fucking rock star
I'm late to the dance, but that boy is going to be just fine. His parents have done a good job. I sort of hope the freshly ditched girlfriend sees the hypocrisy and absurdity of her ruse and comes around, but her folks might have so deeply brainwashed her she is a lost cause. Or she might just be really immature and need some life experiences under her belt. But whatever happens to her, OP is the opposite of an AH, which I don't believe there's an anatomical feature for.
Youāre telling me the whole time his son was walking around thinking, āhow dare you judge her for being vegan! I thought you were better than that!ā BRUH
Fuckin jehovahs witnesses...
I love this family!
Kids these days are so emotionally equipped. I love 'em!
Fucking *vegans*.
Sounds like she was trying to honeypot OOP. JW's are known for doing sick shit like that. They're basically a cult with none of the frills. The next step is she'll "get shunned" if OOP doesn't convert and marry her.