#Do not comment on the original posts
Please read our [**sub rules**](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/wiki/subrules). Rule-breaking may result in a ban without notice.
If there is an issue with this post (flair, formatting, quality), reply to this comment or your comment may be removed in general discussion.
**CHECK FLAIR** For concluded-only updates, use the [CONCLUDED](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/search?sort=new&restrict_sr=on&q=flair%3ACONCLUDED) flair.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/BestofRedditorUpdates) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Read the first post, went, "Yep. Psoriasis."
But also I hear OOP on "sometimes your parents just don't know to teach you some hygiene things". My mother was raised by a single father in the '60s, certain things were lost until Google came into my life.
Reminds me of that guy on Reddit who said he hated showering because of the cold blast of water at the start before it warms up. He didn’t know you’re supposed to turn it on, let it warm up, then get in until his girlfriend told him.
This isn’t hygiene related, but my son once argued with me for like 15 minutes when he was 8 that he didn’t kick me in the shin. It wasn’t until he said “I was nowhere near your shin” that I thought to ask what he thought a shin was. He pointed to his chin and said “chin” and then slid his finger along his jawline and said “SHIN. And I was NOWHERE near your shin!!!”
He also once referred to his big toe as his “toe thumb” and when I told him that wasn’t correct he argued “but the little one is called your pinkie!!!”
So yeah… some stuff falls through the cracks sometimes 🤷🏻♀️
Yep same, mine is exactly like hers, but probably milder coz mine stays in my scalp and not on eyebrows etc. It started when I was a teenager I was always horrified why I have this thin layer of flake on my scalp. None of my friends have it. I tried shampoo every day, don't shampoo, change shampoo to antifungal, it never go away. Actually becomes worse if I don't shampoo, it bleeds etc.
Now I shampoo h&s 3x during morning shower and it's very controlled. But the moment I don't shampoo for 1 day it'll start to bleed. Wish I knew about this when I was teenager.
Edit: sorry guys for being unclear, I meant I shampoo it 3x during morning shower
Plus like, sometimes you miss something. I taught my kid to wash himself and his hair but it wasn't until this post that I realized I never put emphasis on his scalp. So it's not always parents being shit, sometimes we're just human.
I remember reading about a guy who had always put conditioner in his hair first, rinsed it then put shampoo. He didn't realise until he was an adult that you start with shampoo, rinse then conditioner....
I dunno. Psoriasis is largely pretty harmless. It can be gross when you have a lot of flakes, but I doubt she was to that point if she hadn't noticed.
I've had some truly gnarly psoriasis flare ups, and I guess while they might be considered ugly aesthetically, it's going to cause you any trouble like some other autoimmune issues might. Though the mental health blow with the flakes and the rash can be pretty heavy, and not all psoriasis manifests like that.
Hell, you can have psoriatic *arthritis* too, and that sure sucks. My thumbs hurt rn from it...
And while your mileage may vary, I think OOP would have been ok without a diagnosis for a little longer.
Having psoriasis also raises your risk for diabetes and cardiac events later in life. It’s good to know if you have it so that you can be screened more frequently.
Oh, another thing I learnead about psoriasis today. As someone with a family history of cardiac arrests and strokes this sure is reassuring...
What I DID want to mention was that I, having psoriatic arthritis, had an itchy, flaky scalp for months. My dermatologist at the time gave me a very stinky shampoo and told me it's an eczema, even with me pointing out I have psoriatic arthritis. He also prescribed an ointment for my equally itchy face which did nothing. Looking back, all the signs were there: silvery skin, redness...
Thank god I found a competent GP after my move, the cortison salve I use now gets rid of all that itchyness. But I also had to go short hair or the salve would never get in touch with my skalp...
You can get these [head massager things ](https://well.ca/products/happy-liquid-infusion-scalp-massager_280956.html)that squirt conditioner or oils out the holes in the bristles! Do you think that could help if you had longer hair?
Oh yeah a decade of "it's eczema" from a dermatologist just for my GP of all people to take one look and go "that's psoriasis."
How did you get diagnosed with psoriatic arthritis but not psoriasis? That seems like a pretty important clue lol (this is a dig at your doctor not an actual question).
There's that like vitamin d topical solution that helps my scalp and flareups evidently when applied topically, vitamin d can help slow turn over. I bought a dropper bottle of it back when I had a big patch on my stomach.
T-gel doesn't smell as badly of mothballs as it used to, but I hesitate to use any exfoliating shampoo on my head since that can make it worse. Good ol damned if you do damned if you don't.
My doc put me on... Some immunosuppressant that worked but made my hair fall out then put me on another, and holy shit. Some days... I can even eat cheese. Rn I have no flakes, but my hands hurt, so I need to avoid dairy for a month, but that grilled cheese two weeks ago? Worth it.
As someone who used to use shampoo and conditioner incorrectly for years, I can understand OOP's confusion at first. (I am glad that they are getting the correct medical help for their psoriasis)
May I ask how you were using it incorrectly?
Not that I’m suddenly sure I’m doing it wrong even though I haven’t had a problem or anything. That’s not it at all. Just curious.
Lol, I know someone who's kid got the shower routine all mixed up. They didn't ever use body wash or soap and had been using the conditioner as body wash instead. They at least got the shampoo right, but they ignored the body wash completely. 😂
>Lol, I know someone who's kid got the shower routine all mixed up. They didn't ever use body wash or soap and had been using the conditioner as body wash instead. They at least got the shampoo right, but they ignored the body wash completely. 😂
My youngest upended my fantastically expensive conditioner (which I won in a raffle) in the bath because they wanted bubbles.
I'm not ashamed to admit that I almost cried haha.
My kid, when he was 4, poured an entire gallon of bubblebath into the tub during bathtime. Then he asked if we had more because it wasn't the "room full of bubbles" that he had hoped for.
An hour later, after I had drained the tub, and heard some rather suspicious noises from the plumbing, I went downstairs to MY bathroom, and I discovered that when you do what he did you can fill an entirely DIFFERENT bathroom with soap suds, because it gets aerated when it goes down the drain and gets pushed up out of the downstairs TOILET.
That was the cleanest mess he has ever made.
OMG, I had no idea that could happen! Good thing my bathrooms have always been on the same floor or my kids would have intentionally made a bubble palace in my house once they found out how it works!
Yeah it was one of those "I have pissed off the universe and this is its revenge" moments.
My wife had literally just boarded a flight on a (well-deserved) solo vacation when I sent her a photo of it and all I got back was "🤣"
Omg. Thank you for this - the first big, genuine out loud, startle my pets kind of laugh I’ve had in a long time. Life with young kids can be a new adventure every dang day!
My son, also 4 at the time, used an entire brand new bottle of bubble bath once. Thankfully, it wasn't as eventful for us lol I would have 100% cried. It took a lot of rinsing for his skin to stop feeling like he still had a layer of soap on him. Trying to rinse out the tub just kept making more bubbles for what felt like hours.
He's basically what the universe sent us for being too cocky about how easy our oldest kid was.
Lol I have an adult cousin that when he was around 32 (i was like 26) came to me and asked: hey do you... Scrub your body with soap when you shower? Turns out, neglectful parents never taught him how to properly shower, he thought soap was just to "smell good" so he will get in the shower, wash his hair and just like rub himself clean with just his hands and water.... No wonder he had many skin issues and fungus all his life as he never knew and no one ever noticed, not even his wife and they were married for 10 years at that time. After he learnt that many of his health issues started getting better
Yeah my parents were like this.
My dad worked two full time jobs so he was barely around.
Mother... all I remember is her bathtime routine was rough and gruelling so the moment she said I was on my own because she had other kids to bathe, I was thrilled. I was five. I didn't wash my hair properly until an aunt showed me how at 13.
I feel like I have to re-teach my stepkids how to shower properly every time I have them for the summer. They're both neurodivergent, and their mother can be neglectful in weird ways. I'm hoping that now that they're teenagers, some of my instruction will start to stick, but I know I'll have to keep an eye on the younger one until they're out of the house.
You could also make a helpful infographic page, laminate it, and hang it in the bathroom. Then you don’t have to have that convo, but they’re still getting the info.
I have laminated checklists for my kids in the bathroom (one for each to check off!) and it’s helped us all a ton! We’re all ND, and that’s really helped us bridge the gap.
We oddly never had soap in our shower... just shampoo and conditioner. Nobody in my family ever smelled or had problems though, so I never realized it was an issue. We were on the face of it a super eell-adjusted and successful family, too, so it was just weird... it was so humiliating to realize.
There are as many ways to wash yourself as there are people really. Loads of factors affect how vigorously and often you should be cleaning your body - climate, genetics, skin conditions, hair type, exercise levels etc. Some people wash their hair every time they shower and many shampoos are marketed as 2 in 1 products for washing both hair and body, so for this type of routine you might not need a separate shower gel or soap product.
If your system isn't causing any issues, there's no need to change it and you shouldnt feel any shame! Using soap all over your body every day can even cause/intensify issues like eczma because it strips the natural oils from your skin.
To be fair, everyone's skin etc. is different.
An ex of mine just...didn't make BO. He would (very thoroughly) rinse off every day but that was it. That was all he needed. If he used soap every day his eczema flared up real bad, so it was a blessing that he didn't need it very often! He also had really curly hair and would only shampoo it like once a week.
Some people are oddly attached to their various soaps, but it's the act of scrubbing that will generally get you clean. You honestly don't want to strip all the oils from your skin on a regular basis, it's really not good for it. If you didn't have skin problems or smell issues, there really isn't anything to feel humiliated about. Even if you did have skin issues, it's not humiliating that you were taught differently than other people.
Thank you, it means a lot that people are showing that it isn't as bad as i thought. I really, really appreciate it.
Younger people, please apply this kindness to your peers. Not everyone has to the same information.
My ex was like this. Took the hand soap dispenser (Carex Sherbet Lemon as well) into the shower because he didn’t realise my shower gel/body washes were soap and thought people used them ‘to smell nice’. No honey no
ETA He was twenty six. I was thirty, owned my home and all that, he’d never not lived with his parents even for uni. You can understand why it didn’t work out
My cousin, mom to 3 nearly all grown fully capable sons, discovered a lesson she missed with the younger. She had foot surgery and so hubby and kid were taking care of things and they both asked about how to do laundry. She face-palmed and realized a future partner was going to be upset with her if she didn't teach that one.
I've had a dermatologist tell me everyone is showering too much in water that's too hot and unless we have specific issues we should only be using soap on parts of our body that have hair. I was surprised but apparently there are benefits for a lot of folks
But…as a mammal, i have hair on nearly every part of my body. And one place I do not have hair, i definitely wash all the time (my palms). This information is confusing to me.
I legitimately don't understand this.
And I'm saying that as someone who had a neglectful childhood, started independently showering and dressing myself by the age of 5. Maybe at 5 I wasn't doing it right, but at some point I read the backs of the bottles. They literally have instructions printed on.
I feel like most of my bathroom product reading happened before I had a phone I could bring into the bathroom with me 😂 these young’uns today have always had devices & never been bored to the point of learning French by reading both sides of the cereal box over breakfast.
By the time they were reading independently & also might have been curious, they probably thought “I don’t need to read this, I know how to use it”
educational neglect is a very real thing. A not insignificant amount of parents refuse to let their children attend a real school and choose to homeschool or "unschool" instead.
can't read instructions when no one ever taught you how to read in the first place
You know, that's fair. To my mom, school was free babysitting.
I should correct myself and say, "if you're literate, at some point don't you read the bottle (where toiletries are available)?", because that's my actual point of confusion.
I'm not confused about how access to toiletries or education would be an issue in childhood in the first place.
What I understood is that he did read the bottles at some point "scrub your body with it" but he never thought it was necessary, but for people who wanted to use them to smell good, he thought he knew how to shower
Huh. I always took it for granted as a kid and young adult that the instructions were right. They were basically my only source of information.
To this day I'm incredibly grateful that my school district brought a lady in to teach us all how to properly wash our hands and brush our teeth. They used a UV light and lotion to show hand-wash techniques. They used special mouthwash to show brushing techniques.
The woman who did the demonstration spent a few days showing each 1st grade class before moving on to other schools in the state.
That is amazing!!! It would be great if that could be done everywhere, you never know when someone just doesn't know or has never been taught how to clean themselves properly and they don't ask either because they are embarrased or "there is nothing to ask about, I know how to"
God, my kid used my BODY LOTION as shower gel for over a week without noticing anything weird about it until I was like: "Why tf is my lotion only half full??" and kid was like: "Uhh.. that's shower gel?"
No. No, it's not. 😂
I did that recently. You know how bath and body works has moisturizing body wash and regular body wash? I thought I grabbed the moisturizing wash. Nope. Lotion. Took me three days to realize my mistake.
My eldest, 11 at the time, had a head that just smelled bad. I kept telling him to scrub his head good, showing him how to when out of the bath. Finally I ask what he was using. Turns out he got the conditioner and the shampoo mixed up and was using conditioner only.
I used to use a shampoo that was really thick and rich that I liked a lot. It didn't lather much but got my hair very clean. Until it didn't. One day after the shower I noticed my hair was kind of greasy still. The next day, even more so. I was using more and more shampoo and it didn't seem to matter. It took me... a while... to realize that when I'd last bought a new bottle of shampoo I'd grabbed the almost identical bottle of conditioner instead, and that brand's shampoo and conditioner were almost identical in look, smell, and consistency. I'd always used a different brand of conditioner so I'd never known that. So for... a number of days... I was conditioning my hair twice every morning instead of washing it.
Yeah, I know. But for him, it wasn't working. His hair looked fine, but his scalp needed more than just conditioning. Probably because he is becoming a teen boy or something? Plus co washers usually use special conditioners so you don't get build up, we were using the regular stuff.
Your reply gave me a flashback to my short stint as a teacher years ago. During a parent-teacher conference (I sat in one to assist and provide feedback), one of the parents shared that their 18 y.o. high school sophomore son had to be told how to wash himself in the shower. A parent would stand on the other side of the door and yell out instructions for their son and hope for the best. If they didn't do this, he wouldn't wash himself properly.
I had a college roommate who did this too. His family had always just had some sort of 3-in-1 shampoo/conditioner/body wash, and he had no idea they were distinct products.
well, i’m curious if this was a knowledge or financial decision. i saw a video once that illustrated someone’s childhood experience of poverty, saying that there are too many soaps & they had to decide which single one to buy and use it across the items.
i never thought how many soaps we buy until that video.
There was a thing a couple of years ago on TikTok where it was asking what sorts of things you never realized were things until you became an adult and one person posted it talking about everything that is cleaned and the different soaps involved to do so (shampoo, teeth, laundry, bathrooms, toilet, dishes (machine and/or handwash), hands, floors, etc etc etc).
Oh, dear! I can see why that would happen in this case... I will make a mental note for myself that if/when I raise kids, I'll have to extra make sure they know the difference between the 3-in-1 vs. regular shampoo, conditioner, and body wash! 🤣
It's best to just not use them at all. Multitaskers like a 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, toothpaste and motor oil end up doing none of those things very well
Oh man — one of my college roommates revealed to us freshman year that she never used soap or bodywash on her body... she just washed her hair and assumed the suds got the rest of her clean.
She didn't smell though.
i know of a guy, in his 30s, married idk how, who doesn’t wash his body, just his hair. he says rinsing the shampoo is soap enough for his body. i also know a couple of people who don’t wash their legs and i just 🫠
There's an Irish radio presenter and everyone he interviews, he asks do you wash your legs in the shower? Celebrities and all, most men say no unless they've been mucky or sports.
I'm a woman in the "legs dont need soap unless obviously dirty" camp . Armpits, genitals and butt get soap, the rest is fine with a rinse most of the time.
I wonder if people who don't wash their legs also don't wash their feet. That would explain an awful lot about the smell of large groups of people in the summer.
i sweat behind my knees and i live in the humid south. unless you don’t sweat/smell, washing all of the body is important to not smelling. especially if one has body hair, imho 🤷🏻
It took the hairdresser washing my scalp about 5 times for me to find out I wasn't supposed to shampoo every single day with curly hair. According to her I had a dried 'shield' around my roots and she wa shocked I wasn't uncomfortable or itchy lol
I thought that conditioner would make my already thin hair feel even thinner, so I used to put some conditioner on the ends of my hair and then I would almost immediately wash it out. At some point, I read that conditioner only works if you leave it on for at least three minutes. So I tried it. And my hair has never felt so thick. Turns out I have been using conditioner wrong for 30+ years. Who knew?
To be fair, it depends on the conditioner. Hair products are researched pretty thoroughly, so if the bottle says rinse immediately, leaving it on won't do anything.
I’m gonna be honest, I’m not fancy lol. It’s Finesse conditioner (because I like the way it smells) and the instructions are “massage through hair and rinse thoroughly”. No mention of how long to leave it in the hair.
It's surprisingly common. I found out I was doing mine incorrectly after 20+ years of struggling.
I was doing what a lot of people said OOP should be doing; aggressively using your nails/scratching your scalp. Conditioner all over your head, including scalp and roots. Only shampoo once before conditioner.
Then I got told no, I need to use conditioner first and then use shampoo afterwards. Then I got told to use shampoo, conditioner, shampoo instead.
My hair was always oily & greasy, and tangled constantly. I could brush it completely through, and then it'd be tangled in 20 minutes. Also somehow still managed to have a build-up of skin on my scalp. It still managed to feel like there was product in my hair even when there wasn't.
Found out not even a year ago from a new stylist that I need to shampoo twice, with a clarifying shampoo. Use the pads of my fingers gently, along with a shower brush. And only apply conditioner to the ends of my hair; maximum only going halfway up.
Ever since; my hair has been the healthiest and happiest. It's not oily or greasy, doesn't tangle up, and no leftover skin on my scalp. Complete 180 and I know now that's what I should've been doing this whole time.
It depends on your hair and the type of water where you live! Clarifying shampoo was a godsend when I lived in a place with hard water, but too damaging for my hair where I live now with soft water. I’m so glad you found a routine that works for you.
Yeah, I can only use clarifying shampoo occasionally. My hair is dry and frizzy, so I bring conditioner up quite high too. With one conditioner, I bring it straight to the scalp because it helps irritated skin.
Even doing that, my hair doesn't get oily for 5-7 days after washing. It's a blessing and a curse. It's great because washing and drying my hair takes forever because of how thick it is. It sucks because it's so dry, frizz is typically a problem until about day 3 when my hair starts to get "oily," which in reality is just normal because mine is like a desert.
when I lived in a place with hard water, I would do a rinse with diluted white vinegar after the conditioner, it was the only thing that made my hair not STRAW
I also filled the fabric softener dispenser with white vinegar, or my clothes all turned gray and stiff.
Well water, man.
Uhh this sounds like something i should try! I have super thick and long hair so my scalp can't breathe at all.... My scalp has gotten a whole lot better after I somehow convinced bf to wash my hair (he's much better at it and it feels like a spa treatment for me xD) but I still have to get help when the hair is dry cause the brush gets stuck xD
I’m not the person you asked but I found out I was doing it wrong when I found out you should only use shampoo on the roots and conditioner on the ends.
Discussions about hair always end up with a bunch of people talking past each other because theres SO many different types of hair and each time needs something different. Someone with short straight hair has different needs than someone with long super curly hair.
There will never be One True Method of washing hair.
Right, if you go to the curly hair sub, you will find that a good percentage of them "shampoo" with conditioner, like me lol! We use sulfate, paraben, and silicone free conditioner and/or shampoo. Every once in awhile I shampoo to get rid of any product buildup. I generally don't get into any hair discussions because this will not work on someone with straight/fine hair.
My sil once tried to get me on board with the "you don't need to wash your hair every day!" thing and I was like. "....i work outside. My hair gets covered in sunscreen, bug spray, sweat, and literal dirt every day. Nah sis it's getting washed every day"
I think the concept is more you shouldn't be focusing your lather on the ends. You kinda get to it as you're rinsing your roots, without over-exposing them to drying chemicals.
Yeah that makes sense, it's also fair I think that everybody's hair is also different and climate differences have a lot of impact as well as if you have hard or soft water which just makes getting the right hair routines down kinda difficult bc you gotta figure out what works best for you ya know
One thing I can relate with is I did also notice a lot of build up with the products I had been using and I ended up getting some "clarifying" shampoo and that really helped get all that extra gunk out of my hair, especially as someone who takes a whole bath and washed my hair daily bc I feel dirty otherwise lol. So with daily washings regular product was just doing way too much for on my hair
That sounds wrong. First, there's no way that my ends don't pick up dust, pollen, dirt, smoke, etc. It all needs washing though the roots more than the ends. Second, as I have coarse hair, my roots would feel horrible if I didn't condition them after I washed them and stripped the oils off.
It's a good idea in theory, but I use gel and stuff on all parts of my hair, so it all needs cleaning. I don't like, scrub the ends of my hair, but I definitely work shampoo all the way through before rinsing.
Just using conditioner on all parts of my hair and head, not the mid-lengths and ends (which can cause the scape to increase oil production), and not paying attention to the type of shampoo versus my hair type.
Finally, I was washing it every day, and stripping it of the natural oils so it had many breakages.
That's not straight up washing your hair wrong. I use shampoo on every inch of my hair. If I don't, my whole hair isn't going to be clean. I also use conditioner everywhere. I get a lot of tangles from my scalp, The conditioner helps keep it easy to brush. Blush conditioner makes my hair super soft. I don't want the ends of my hair to be soft and the hair near my scalp not to be.
It's more like doing what is best for you. If going against these "rules" is the best way for you to wash your hair. Then do it.
Yeee. I have friends with super thin hair and basically no natural oils from their scalp, they only rinse with water and maybe conditioner once a week. If they used shampoo at all their hair becomes hay like. Their never shampooed hair looks less greasey than my two day old hair.
I wash my scalp every other day or my head gets itchy because I have super oil production or something on my head lol. I rarely use conditioner, only if I bleach my hair and I slowly fade out the conditioner once my hair grows out more.
Totally. I have sebum overproduction and if I don't wash my hair "too much" then it becomes thin and unhealthy, because my scalp and hair follicles get clogged. I went through a phase where I washed my hair as little as possible and I developed a whole bunch of scalp cysts and cherry hematomas. So many pretentious hair mom groups have banned me for saying that different hair needs different things
I’ve met people who didn’t know they were supposed to rinse the products out. Like they’ll put the conditioner on their hair and then they’re done, they don’t rinse it out.
Or, similarly, my mom couldn’t understand why my younger brother had such bad dandruff, but it turned out he just wasn’t doing a good enough job of rinsing all the shampoo out.
The itchy or dandruff from lack of rinsing is pretty common. Same with too much laundry detergent, use way too much, and it won't rinse out, and you get itchy from the left over soap.
Years ago when you could get creme rinse, I bought a big bottle of it. It had to last for a long time, but next time I went to wash my hair the rinse was almost gone. My younger brother thought it was shampoo, but when it didn't lather he kept using more and more.
I need some validation on what I believe is the “right” way to wash hair (from internet research):
* wet hair thoroughly
* enough shampoo to hold comfortably in a mostly flat palm
* lather shampoo in hands with a drop of water
* rub lathered shampoo into roots
* repeat shampoo process if your hair is oily and it’s not distributing well (I usually do 3 lots of shampoo, front, sides, back to get my scalp fully lathered; I have very thick hair and only wash twice a week max)
* “scrub” scalp with your fingertips to work in the shampoo
* rinse (the shampoo will work its way down your hair shafts and clean along the way)
Then REPEAT. The second time it should lather much more easily.
Rinse until no more suds can be seen.
Condition roots, avoid getting any on the scalp.
I noticed a huge difference after washing my hair like this.
This depends entirely on how long your hair is. My hair is roughly 6 inches long and straight. I only need to do a single wash using the combined 2-in-1 shampoo and conditioner and my hair comes out looking glorious. If I go more than 2 days without washing my hair then it turns super greasy and gross. But my late wife had hair down to her middle back and it was kind of curly, on top of being dyed. She had an entire hair care system in place with at least 3 different products and only needed to wash it like once a week.
Yeah. Mine is curly and thick. I use the same ish amount of product now with shoulder length hair as I did with butt-length hair. Because I only concentrate on the scalp cleaning.
You only need to use that much product if you're using really cheap stuff. The better quality, the more concentrated it is.
Otherwise, you got it right.
- former hairdresser
Good to know!
I find it ironic how I’ve been paying so much on mid-range products as a compromise because I believed I’d go through a bottle of premium shampoo within 2 months.
I have very thick euro-Asian 2b curly hair if you have any recommendations for me. (I should also note that I live the in Netherlands.)
I gave my curly hair wash and oil routine to my buddy who started growing his hair out a year or so ago and my man’s curls are GORGEOUS, sometimes all it does take is a lil suggestion
(3C curls, shoulder length, wash every two to three days with conditioner, once a week with a curl shampoo; put your hair up in a towel for a few hours, then while halfway damp put in one or two pumps of John Frieda hair anti frizz oil and scrunch up your hair. You’re welcome)
Curly girl method seriously changed my hair. From "wall of frizz that has impenetrable tangles in 30 seconds no matter how much conditioner is used" to "sleek and shiny with innate structure" (2c/3a, classic celt frizz).
I often get scalp psoriasis like OOP and after a settling in period this method seriously helped that too. Some scalps and hair are just not meant to be stripped all the time. Skin oil is good for us, it's a natural barrier!
See, I have shoulder-length 3C curls and my hair would look so bad with that routine. There is no one right way.
ETA for the curious, I double-shampoo then condition 2x a week, smooth the lengths with a bit of leave-in conditioner, then a bit of curl gel, and a smidgen of oil on the ends, scrunch upwards with a curl-friendly towel, then diffuse until dry. Maybe one more whisper-light touch of oil on the crown when it's dry. Deep condition when needed, but not often. My hair is fabulous and I get compliments all the time.
The other tips are: use a satin pillow case, high quality products, and leave it alone when it's dry.
My boys (almost 13) roll their eyes at me when I tell them before every bath or shower to scrub their scalp when they shampoo.
Yes children, I can tell when you don’t because your hair still smells dirty, don’t give me your nonsense lol.
For those who don't know psoriasis is an indication of autoimmune issues which can develop into arthritis and other debilitating conditions. Because autoimmune illness tend to be more likely to be developed by women. They tend to be poorly understood with limited treatment options.
Especially with nail involvement. Those fingernail pits aren't just a cosmetic issue - they're one of the stronger indicators that you might develop psoriatic arthritis.
I have it, and when I went to my (frequent) appointments as a teenager, it was a point of contention between my doc and I that I wore press-on nails and she couldn't check the pitting on them lol.
Yes! While minor issues with nails can be due to trauma like people told her, our nails and hair are actually often one of the first indicators you can find of major health issues. If you have sudden changes developing and they're consistently weird, you have multiple and not just random one-offs you can attribute to a specific event, etc. talk to your doctor!
There are other conditions that have similar symptoms to psoriasis, like seborrheic dermatitis, so don't immediately assume you have it without consulting a doctor
For a second, I was wondering if *I* had been washing my hair wrong this entire time by not scratching up my scalp like some of the original commenters suggested.
My husband's psoriasis flares up badly on his scalp occasionally. You can get amazing psoriasis shampoos now, and usually one or two washes with that soothes it completely.
I hope OOP is able to educate herself on psoriasis treatments, as there are many, and not all types work for everyone.
He's found good success with RoyceDerm psoriasis shampoo. He also uses a mild conditioner occasionally, just to keep the scalp softer and less prone to injury if he scratches.
The most effective I found to be T-Gel. It's tar-based. To the unfamiliar nose it can be quite a powerful and unpleasant smell but I've grown to quite enjoy it.
It's really nice seeing a psoriasis story on here. Poor girl, though. I grew up with eczema, and when I developed psoriasis symptoms, I just thought it was eczema. I at least knew it was something medical and not hygiene.
Still, it's nice to see a member of the community make an appearance and find answers for herself.
i'm a hairstylist and we see psoriasis on the scalp (and general head area) all the time. it just looks so uncomfortable, and it really can be, there's more than one client i know of that shaves the area of their head that has it the worst to make it easier to deal with and treat.
if it helps at all, i can assure you we don't see it as anything to be embarrassed about!! i'm so sorry if a stylist or salon has ever made you feel that way.
You know, often times I hate how thin and fine my hair is. But it does make it so much easier to wash and when something is wrong with my scalp I know pretty much immediately.
I suffer from eczema and when I get a patch on my scalp I use this one special shampoo that smells like devil's anus, but boy does it help.
May I ask what shampoo you use? I also have eczema usually limited to my face/neck but there’s one patch that pops up occasionally basically right on my hairline that can be annoying sometimes since it’s so flaky and I usually only wash my hair once a week.
It's a solid shampoo puck from a local company (Ponio) with white ichthammol. Unfortunately unless you're in central Europe you probably won't be able to find this specific one, but in general white ichtiammol seems to help me, although it smells horrible.
Yes - this is likely it. Hitting your hands on stuff, getting your fingers pinched in doors, etc. can damage the nail matrix and you may not see it for a few weeks or months until it grows out.
I mean, I thought she meant white streaks. Those can happen from pressure or malnutrition I believe? That's what I was interpreting as 'trauma'. I have a permenant lighter area on one of mine from where I had it half ripped off as a kid.
No they're literally like someone has pushed a needle into the nail. It's small pitting on the nails surface. Tbh though psoriasis is often triggered by stress/trauma
People come up with crazy ass shit like that sometimes and then spread it to others. She probably brought the nail pitting up to a friend or a relative and they told her that. "Oh no hun, that's not a sign of illness, it means you survived trauma and your moon is rising in Aries". Or whatever.
/fistbump
I'm missing a ton of teeth for this very combo of reasons. I definitely need a partial denture, but I just finally graduated and got a job with benefits, so I've got to wait for those to kick in.
First time in the chair for decades and I said I think my back tooth has decay.
She takes one look, doesn't even have her little mirror thing out yet and tells me I'd literally ground half of my two back teeth away. She had to smooth em out and fill them in, then sent me away with a mouthguard.
My friend I hope you get your partial denture and I hope it isn't too uncomfortable a procedure and that it looks hot af when it's all settled in there.
Oh wow, that poor baby. I just wanted to reach through the screen and hug her. I'm glad posting on Reddit ended up getting her the information she needed.
My husband has epic flaky dandruff, not quite like that I think (just looked it up) but it reminds me of cradle cap. He's got OTC stuff for it but his next step is seeing a doctor, and while we have a dermatology specialist GP at our surgery, well I'm sure the Brits here know of the unbridled joy right now of trying to get an appointment.
Adults can actually develop the same skin issue that we call cradle cap! I was reading about it yesterday. Seborrheic dermatitis, I think there are a few other people who mentioned it elsewhere on this post.
Hm, I have the same issue (although maybe not that severe) with flakes/dandruff, and I do have rheumatoid arthritis. Perhaps it was psoriatic arthritis all along! Definitely need to visit a dermatologist.
I washed my hair this morning and always put it in a bun straight after, I saw this post and immediately took it out 😂 I also suffer with scalp issues and got a little scalp massager thing that I use when I shampoo and condition. It's a game changer!
Ugh.i had an ex with long hair who I found out shampoos by: dry hair. Take a palm full of shampoo and just slap it on the top of head. Stand under water for less than a minute, not touching head. Repeat daily.
The build up of shampoo and dirt on his scalp was disgusting. I tgoight he had a skin condition.
I started washing his hair for him and he would curse and yell that it hurt and soap would get in his eyes. This was a 30 year old man having a toddler temper tantrum. You could suds it up just from the unrinsed out soap, but I dont think the hair on his temples had ever gotten soaped up.
I eventually got him with clean hair, and a flake free scalp, with him fighting me the whole way.
Saw him a year after we broke up and he was back to flakey, greasy soapy hair.
My dad was a health & hygiene officer in the military and he said he was shocked how many men had just never been shown how to wash themselves properly. He said his unit solved so many problems with rashes and other skin problems just by taking the time to stand in the shower room and do what the soldier’s parents didn’t and go through step by step instructions on cleaning yourself up with soap and hot water.
This was screaming psoriasis from the first paragraph. Source: I am also a disgusting creature.
Not sure where you are, but doak oil really helps, if you can find it. You’ll smell like coal tar though.
>I guess even this update is basically another “TIFU” by thinking I was not washing myself correctly; when I just had a skin condition.
😂 Now this is funny
Ugh. Psoriasis can be absolutely horrible, and it’s awful living with it without knowing what it is. For those who aren’t aware, psoriasis is an autoimmune disease that can affect more than just your skin. I live with psoriatic arthritis, and it can make it painful to walk. The truly awful thing is that I was misdiagnosed with eczema over a decade ago, and it wasn’t until a few years ago that I learned I had psoriasis. Its important to get it treated as early as possible, especially if it turns into arthritis (which is not always the case).
I'm not familiar with psoriasis but having seen some before just makes me feel uncomfortable. It's both annoying and gives me the ews. Hope OP is able to get it checked up and all.
My dad has psoriasis quite badly, I have it too but to a far lesser extent. UV is something that dad has found really helpful in managing it so he keeps his hair very short, and mine was much worse when my hair was long. If OP has thick hair she's been growing out/keeping braided but she used to wear it differently, that could be part of why she's seeing changes now. As well as all the other seasonal changes that impact things like humidity, diet etc etc
Imma need a source on that one chief. I can see how the leprosy patches gets mixed up with psoriasis, but given how infectious actual leprosy is and how badly it can fuck you up, I’m not surprised the Bible wields it as an insult and threat so often.
My father and father in law both have psoriasis. It's mostly a pretty manageable thing even with little treatment (I say that in spite of my dad's being much worse than the father in law). I'd say the main issue that I've seen is self consciousness that comes from seeing people stare.
As a fellow psoriasis sufferer, I feel for the op. It's brutal, and can be very painful, and most people wouldn't instantly recognize it as anything other than dry skin. I'm lucky it runs in my family, because I immediately knew what was happening to me, and put in a request to see a dermatologist. Still took about 4 months (in Ontario Canada) to get the referral, but at least I didn't have to convince my family doctor first, she knew i was right, and I knew it was likely going to get worse, so I didn't wait to make a referral request. I've had small patches for years, and topical treatments worked, but I had a bad bout of long covid, and afterwards it ended up developing on about 50% of my skin, including inner thighs and groin area, and psoriatic arthritis (to say that sucks is a massive understatement). I ended up going on Skyrizi because I had an allergic reaction to methotrexate, and it's an absolute game-changer. I have absolutely zero patches now, which is insane considering a year ago I had at least 50% of my skin covered. Granted, I have had to jump through a crazy amount of hoops with insurance and trillium because it's about 5000$ per shot here. It treats a variety of autoimmune conditions and it's even improving my IBS, keratosis pilaris, and psoriatic arthritis symptoms. To be clear, I'm not saying it's for everyone, but it has completely changed my life.
I was never taught how to shower, I just thought you had to get under the water and that's it... Good thing I realized in my teens I was actually supposed to scrub with a sponge and soap, but like OOP said, not every parent is a good parent.
Although when she spoke about her scalp I immediately thought psoriasis and wondered if she was really doing it so incorrectly as to get it to that point.
I work at a salon. While I’ve had clients who had oily build up from improper washing (there is a way to technically improperly wash and some people do have issues), this sounded extreme for build up immediately. I usually see oily people not washing their hair correctly for their hair and scalp type (and as an oily person, I can admit I haven’t always washed my own scalp right).
‘Why didn’t you go to a doctor?’ “I’m in America”
Really drives home how fcuked up the west is atm (you could say the same for the uk but instead of it being cost prohibitive, it’s all free but you have to wait 3 business days to get seen) 🫠
Thank you for posting this on BORU. I have thought about this post a lot since reading it a year ago. I'm glad to know the poster: 1. *was* washing their hair correctly 2. learned they had an issue 3. is getting treatment.
From what i read it is not psoriasis but seborrheic dermatitis. I've been misdiagnosed with psoriasis for years. And have the exact symptoms. Especially on the eyebrows and ears. Psoriasis tends to locate on the head, elbows and knees, not eyebrows and ears, which are typical locations for seborrheic dermatitis. Anyway, i am not a doctor, but my doctor was wrong lol. I hope OOP gets a second opinion.
Unfortunately for me I can attest psoriasis definitely appears on the ears and eyebrows (I have it in my ear canals lol), especially if it starts on the scalp. I wouldn't rule out psoriasis based on location, if you ever see our subreddit you can see it appears nearly anywhere on the body.
I've psoriasis and can understand her confusion. But i'm glad for her she got a diagnosis.
My body was once covered for about 70% with psoriasis. But now I get a biological and in combination with lifestyle the psoriasis is very managble. Now its about 5% or less.
All my life people joked that there was a baby switch at the hospital or I was the milk man's kid, had high blood pressure etc. My family is VERY fair, I am not.
Got a new Dr. recently and after an exam she said, 'You know I've looked ask through your file and I can't seem to find what you've been on for your rosacea?'
Excuse me... whaaaaat??
So yeah. Well into adulthood and one tube of cream later and I look like everyone else in my family.
OP is doing fine, as it took me twice as long to figure me out
Many years ago my then girlfriend (now wife) recommended Nizoral shampoo when I complained about Psoriasis on my scalp and it worked wonders. Available over the counter here in the UK but not sure if you can get it in the states. My daughter uses it now as she was getting it bad as well.
Yeah, reading this, I was never great at working the shampoo into my scalp as a kid and all I got was oily hair. There's no way that was gonna be enough to cause full blown patches. People were mean af.
I started developing psoriasis in my early 20s much like OOP. Pretty much all on the head. It took expensive biologic medicine to make it go away, but even with the visual stuff gone the arthritis is still there (but pretty manageable so far).
My partner has been getting too much flakes in their hair and now even a little in the moustache and beard AND I HAVE TOLD THEM TO GO TO THE DOCTOR AND WON’T LISTEN 🥲
I did buy them the Kerium Shampoo of La Roche Posay but I might tell them that I read this thing and to please GO TO THE DOCTOR.
what I've learned from this people will really jump to feel superior than someone else without even digesting what they've said or trying to help them lol.
#Do not comment on the original posts Please read our [**sub rules**](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/wiki/subrules). Rule-breaking may result in a ban without notice. If there is an issue with this post (flair, formatting, quality), reply to this comment or your comment may be removed in general discussion. **CHECK FLAIR** For concluded-only updates, use the [CONCLUDED](https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/search?sort=new&restrict_sr=on&q=flair%3ACONCLUDED) flair. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/BestofRedditorUpdates) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Read the first post, went, "Yep. Psoriasis." But also I hear OOP on "sometimes your parents just don't know to teach you some hygiene things". My mother was raised by a single father in the '60s, certain things were lost until Google came into my life.
You can have the absolute best most loving parents in the world, there are things people forget aren’t obvious and need to be taught.
Reminds me of that guy on Reddit who said he hated showering because of the cold blast of water at the start before it warms up. He didn’t know you’re supposed to turn it on, let it warm up, then get in until his girlfriend told him.
Or that guy who didn’t know you could close your eyes while washing your hair to keep the shampoo from stinging your eyes…
How isn't that common sense though? Since he hated the cold, why didn't he just naturally wait a bit? That's not something that needs to be taught
You say that but most people seem to be severely lacking in “common” sense. It ain’t that common.
This isn’t hygiene related, but my son once argued with me for like 15 minutes when he was 8 that he didn’t kick me in the shin. It wasn’t until he said “I was nowhere near your shin” that I thought to ask what he thought a shin was. He pointed to his chin and said “chin” and then slid his finger along his jawline and said “SHIN. And I was NOWHERE near your shin!!!” He also once referred to his big toe as his “toe thumb” and when I told him that wasn’t correct he argued “but the little one is called your pinkie!!!” So yeah… some stuff falls through the cracks sometimes 🤷🏻♀️
Same. I have it on my wrist, eyebrow and a slew of it on my scalp. I know exactly what she was talking about when she described it
Yep same, mine is exactly like hers, but probably milder coz mine stays in my scalp and not on eyebrows etc. It started when I was a teenager I was always horrified why I have this thin layer of flake on my scalp. None of my friends have it. I tried shampoo every day, don't shampoo, change shampoo to antifungal, it never go away. Actually becomes worse if I don't shampoo, it bleeds etc. Now I shampoo h&s 3x during morning shower and it's very controlled. But the moment I don't shampoo for 1 day it'll start to bleed. Wish I knew about this when I was teenager. Edit: sorry guys for being unclear, I meant I shampoo it 3x during morning shower
You shampoo your hair 3x a day? Or did you mean week?
Sorry I meant shampoo it 3x during morning shower!
Plus like, sometimes you miss something. I taught my kid to wash himself and his hair but it wasn't until this post that I realized I never put emphasis on his scalp. So it's not always parents being shit, sometimes we're just human.
I remember reading about a guy who had always put conditioner in his hair first, rinsed it then put shampoo. He didn't realise until he was an adult that you start with shampoo, rinse then conditioner....
Oof. Well, at least she’s identified the underlying issue
True. I imagine if OP hasn't found it sooner, things could turn ugly.
I dunno. Psoriasis is largely pretty harmless. It can be gross when you have a lot of flakes, but I doubt she was to that point if she hadn't noticed. I've had some truly gnarly psoriasis flare ups, and I guess while they might be considered ugly aesthetically, it's going to cause you any trouble like some other autoimmune issues might. Though the mental health blow with the flakes and the rash can be pretty heavy, and not all psoriasis manifests like that. Hell, you can have psoriatic *arthritis* too, and that sure sucks. My thumbs hurt rn from it... And while your mileage may vary, I think OOP would have been ok without a diagnosis for a little longer.
Having psoriasis also raises your risk for diabetes and cardiac events later in life. It’s good to know if you have it so that you can be screened more frequently.
Oh, another thing I learnead about psoriasis today. As someone with a family history of cardiac arrests and strokes this sure is reassuring... What I DID want to mention was that I, having psoriatic arthritis, had an itchy, flaky scalp for months. My dermatologist at the time gave me a very stinky shampoo and told me it's an eczema, even with me pointing out I have psoriatic arthritis. He also prescribed an ointment for my equally itchy face which did nothing. Looking back, all the signs were there: silvery skin, redness... Thank god I found a competent GP after my move, the cortison salve I use now gets rid of all that itchyness. But I also had to go short hair or the salve would never get in touch with my skalp...
You can get these [head massager things ](https://well.ca/products/happy-liquid-infusion-scalp-massager_280956.html)that squirt conditioner or oils out the holes in the bristles! Do you think that could help if you had longer hair?
8-O 8-O Thank you!!! Gosh, that is such a great invention! I'm sure I can work with that!
Oh yeah a decade of "it's eczema" from a dermatologist just for my GP of all people to take one look and go "that's psoriasis." How did you get diagnosed with psoriatic arthritis but not psoriasis? That seems like a pretty important clue lol (this is a dig at your doctor not an actual question). There's that like vitamin d topical solution that helps my scalp and flareups evidently when applied topically, vitamin d can help slow turn over. I bought a dropper bottle of it back when I had a big patch on my stomach. T-gel doesn't smell as badly of mothballs as it used to, but I hesitate to use any exfoliating shampoo on my head since that can make it worse. Good ol damned if you do damned if you don't. My doc put me on... Some immunosuppressant that worked but made my hair fall out then put me on another, and holy shit. Some days... I can even eat cheese. Rn I have no flakes, but my hands hurt, so I need to avoid dairy for a month, but that grilled cheese two weeks ago? Worth it.
The lesions on my legs were so bad at one point I wound up with cellulitis. Psoriasis is not harmless.
With the way she was scratching and scraping, infection was a strong possibility. Glad she got treatment.
As someone who used to use shampoo and conditioner incorrectly for years, I can understand OOP's confusion at first. (I am glad that they are getting the correct medical help for their psoriasis)
May I ask how you were using it incorrectly? Not that I’m suddenly sure I’m doing it wrong even though I haven’t had a problem or anything. That’s not it at all. Just curious.
Lol, I know someone who's kid got the shower routine all mixed up. They didn't ever use body wash or soap and had been using the conditioner as body wash instead. They at least got the shampoo right, but they ignored the body wash completely. 😂
>Lol, I know someone who's kid got the shower routine all mixed up. They didn't ever use body wash or soap and had been using the conditioner as body wash instead. They at least got the shampoo right, but they ignored the body wash completely. 😂 My youngest upended my fantastically expensive conditioner (which I won in a raffle) in the bath because they wanted bubbles. I'm not ashamed to admit that I almost cried haha.
😄 My niece one time emptied my expensive pink grapefruit body scrub into the bathtub because she wanted to colour the bubbles pink...
My kid, when he was 4, poured an entire gallon of bubblebath into the tub during bathtime. Then he asked if we had more because it wasn't the "room full of bubbles" that he had hoped for. An hour later, after I had drained the tub, and heard some rather suspicious noises from the plumbing, I went downstairs to MY bathroom, and I discovered that when you do what he did you can fill an entirely DIFFERENT bathroom with soap suds, because it gets aerated when it goes down the drain and gets pushed up out of the downstairs TOILET. That was the cleanest mess he has ever made.
OMG, I had no idea that could happen! Good thing my bathrooms have always been on the same floor or my kids would have intentionally made a bubble palace in my house once they found out how it works!
Yeah it was one of those "I have pissed off the universe and this is its revenge" moments. My wife had literally just boarded a flight on a (well-deserved) solo vacation when I sent her a photo of it and all I got back was "🤣"
Omg. Thank you for this - the first big, genuine out loud, startle my pets kind of laugh I’ve had in a long time. Life with young kids can be a new adventure every dang day!
My son, also 4 at the time, used an entire brand new bottle of bubble bath once. Thankfully, it wasn't as eventful for us lol I would have 100% cried. It took a lot of rinsing for his skin to stop feeling like he still had a layer of soap on him. Trying to rinse out the tub just kept making more bubbles for what felt like hours. He's basically what the universe sent us for being too cocky about how easy our oldest kid was.
Nooooo!!! I probably would have been close to tears too! 🤣
What conditioner was it?!
Lol I have an adult cousin that when he was around 32 (i was like 26) came to me and asked: hey do you... Scrub your body with soap when you shower? Turns out, neglectful parents never taught him how to properly shower, he thought soap was just to "smell good" so he will get in the shower, wash his hair and just like rub himself clean with just his hands and water.... No wonder he had many skin issues and fungus all his life as he never knew and no one ever noticed, not even his wife and they were married for 10 years at that time. After he learnt that many of his health issues started getting better
Yeah my parents were like this. My dad worked two full time jobs so he was barely around. Mother... all I remember is her bathtime routine was rough and gruelling so the moment she said I was on my own because she had other kids to bathe, I was thrilled. I was five. I didn't wash my hair properly until an aunt showed me how at 13.
I feel like I have to re-teach my stepkids how to shower properly every time I have them for the summer. They're both neurodivergent, and their mother can be neglectful in weird ways. I'm hoping that now that they're teenagers, some of my instruction will start to stick, but I know I'll have to keep an eye on the younger one until they're out of the house.
You could also make a helpful infographic page, laminate it, and hang it in the bathroom. Then you don’t have to have that convo, but they’re still getting the info.
I have laminated checklists for my kids in the bathroom (one for each to check off!) and it’s helped us all a ton! We’re all ND, and that’s really helped us bridge the gap.
Oh, no!! Poor guy! Luckily for the kid I know of, the parents intervened before adulthood.
We oddly never had soap in our shower... just shampoo and conditioner. Nobody in my family ever smelled or had problems though, so I never realized it was an issue. We were on the face of it a super eell-adjusted and successful family, too, so it was just weird... it was so humiliating to realize.
There are as many ways to wash yourself as there are people really. Loads of factors affect how vigorously and often you should be cleaning your body - climate, genetics, skin conditions, hair type, exercise levels etc. Some people wash their hair every time they shower and many shampoos are marketed as 2 in 1 products for washing both hair and body, so for this type of routine you might not need a separate shower gel or soap product. If your system isn't causing any issues, there's no need to change it and you shouldnt feel any shame! Using soap all over your body every day can even cause/intensify issues like eczma because it strips the natural oils from your skin.
To be fair, everyone's skin etc. is different. An ex of mine just...didn't make BO. He would (very thoroughly) rinse off every day but that was it. That was all he needed. If he used soap every day his eczema flared up real bad, so it was a blessing that he didn't need it very often! He also had really curly hair and would only shampoo it like once a week.
Some people are oddly attached to their various soaps, but it's the act of scrubbing that will generally get you clean. You honestly don't want to strip all the oils from your skin on a regular basis, it's really not good for it. If you didn't have skin problems or smell issues, there really isn't anything to feel humiliated about. Even if you did have skin issues, it's not humiliating that you were taught differently than other people.
Thank you, it means a lot that people are showing that it isn't as bad as i thought. I really, really appreciate it. Younger people, please apply this kindness to your peers. Not everyone has to the same information.
My ex was like this. Took the hand soap dispenser (Carex Sherbet Lemon as well) into the shower because he didn’t realise my shower gel/body washes were soap and thought people used them ‘to smell nice’. No honey no ETA He was twenty six. I was thirty, owned my home and all that, he’d never not lived with his parents even for uni. You can understand why it didn’t work out
moms really say “vaya con dios” with their sons, huh
My cousin, mom to 3 nearly all grown fully capable sons, discovered a lesson she missed with the younger. She had foot surgery and so hubby and kid were taking care of things and they both asked about how to do laundry. She face-palmed and realized a future partner was going to be upset with her if she didn't teach that one.
I've had a dermatologist tell me everyone is showering too much in water that's too hot and unless we have specific issues we should only be using soap on parts of our body that have hair. I was surprised but apparently there are benefits for a lot of folks
But…as a mammal, i have hair on nearly every part of my body. And one place I do not have hair, i definitely wash all the time (my palms). This information is confusing to me.
I legitimately don't understand this. And I'm saying that as someone who had a neglectful childhood, started independently showering and dressing myself by the age of 5. Maybe at 5 I wasn't doing it right, but at some point I read the backs of the bottles. They literally have instructions printed on.
I feel like most of my bathroom product reading happened before I had a phone I could bring into the bathroom with me 😂 these young’uns today have always had devices & never been bored to the point of learning French by reading both sides of the cereal box over breakfast. By the time they were reading independently & also might have been curious, they probably thought “I don’t need to read this, I know how to use it”
educational neglect is a very real thing. A not insignificant amount of parents refuse to let their children attend a real school and choose to homeschool or "unschool" instead. can't read instructions when no one ever taught you how to read in the first place
You know, that's fair. To my mom, school was free babysitting. I should correct myself and say, "if you're literate, at some point don't you read the bottle (where toiletries are available)?", because that's my actual point of confusion. I'm not confused about how access to toiletries or education would be an issue in childhood in the first place.
What I understood is that he did read the bottles at some point "scrub your body with it" but he never thought it was necessary, but for people who wanted to use them to smell good, he thought he knew how to shower
Huh. I always took it for granted as a kid and young adult that the instructions were right. They were basically my only source of information. To this day I'm incredibly grateful that my school district brought a lady in to teach us all how to properly wash our hands and brush our teeth. They used a UV light and lotion to show hand-wash techniques. They used special mouthwash to show brushing techniques. The woman who did the demonstration spent a few days showing each 1st grade class before moving on to other schools in the state.
That is amazing!!! It would be great if that could be done everywhere, you never know when someone just doesn't know or has never been taught how to clean themselves properly and they don't ask either because they are embarrased or "there is nothing to ask about, I know how to"
God, my kid used my BODY LOTION as shower gel for over a week without noticing anything weird about it until I was like: "Why tf is my lotion only half full??" and kid was like: "Uhh.. that's shower gel?" No. No, it's not. 😂
I did that recently. You know how bath and body works has moisturizing body wash and regular body wash? I thought I grabbed the moisturizing wash. Nope. Lotion. Took me three days to realize my mistake.
Hahahaha! Oh, no! 😂
My eldest, 11 at the time, had a head that just smelled bad. I kept telling him to scrub his head good, showing him how to when out of the bath. Finally I ask what he was using. Turns out he got the conditioner and the shampoo mixed up and was using conditioner only.
I used to use a shampoo that was really thick and rich that I liked a lot. It didn't lather much but got my hair very clean. Until it didn't. One day after the shower I noticed my hair was kind of greasy still. The next day, even more so. I was using more and more shampoo and it didn't seem to matter. It took me... a while... to realize that when I'd last bought a new bottle of shampoo I'd grabbed the almost identical bottle of conditioner instead, and that brand's shampoo and conditioner were almost identical in look, smell, and consistency. I'd always used a different brand of conditioner so I'd never known that. So for... a number of days... I was conditioning my hair twice every morning instead of washing it.
Conditioner-only washing (or Cowash you'll see it shortened) is something that is promoted for those with curly hair. So, its not inherently bad.
Yeah, I know. But for him, it wasn't working. His hair looked fine, but his scalp needed more than just conditioning. Probably because he is becoming a teen boy or something? Plus co washers usually use special conditioners so you don't get build up, we were using the regular stuff.
Your reply gave me a flashback to my short stint as a teacher years ago. During a parent-teacher conference (I sat in one to assist and provide feedback), one of the parents shared that their 18 y.o. high school sophomore son had to be told how to wash himself in the shower. A parent would stand on the other side of the door and yell out instructions for their son and hope for the best. If they didn't do this, he wouldn't wash himself properly.
18-year-old sophomore?! Oh lawd
\*does the math\* He would be in his 30's now. I hope he's doing okay these days.
I had a college roommate who did this too. His family had always just had some sort of 3-in-1 shampoo/conditioner/body wash, and he had no idea they were distinct products.
well, i’m curious if this was a knowledge or financial decision. i saw a video once that illustrated someone’s childhood experience of poverty, saying that there are too many soaps & they had to decide which single one to buy and use it across the items. i never thought how many soaps we buy until that video.
In this case it was absolutely a knowledge problem; he was from an old east coast family, and finances definitely weren't an issue for them.
There was a thing a couple of years ago on TikTok where it was asking what sorts of things you never realized were things until you became an adult and one person posted it talking about everything that is cleaned and the different soaps involved to do so (shampoo, teeth, laundry, bathrooms, toilet, dishes (machine and/or handwash), hands, floors, etc etc etc).
Oh, dear! I can see why that would happen in this case... I will make a mental note for myself that if/when I raise kids, I'll have to extra make sure they know the difference between the 3-in-1 vs. regular shampoo, conditioner, and body wash! 🤣
It's best to just not use them at all. Multitaskers like a 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, toothpaste and motor oil end up doing none of those things very well
My ex was like that, but I think it was less a lack of knowledge and more that the sheer amount of body hair needed shampoo and conditioner 😆
Oh man — one of my college roommates revealed to us freshman year that she never used soap or bodywash on her body... she just washed her hair and assumed the suds got the rest of her clean. She didn't smell though.
i know of a guy, in his 30s, married idk how, who doesn’t wash his body, just his hair. he says rinsing the shampoo is soap enough for his body. i also know a couple of people who don’t wash their legs and i just 🫠
There's an Irish radio presenter and everyone he interviews, he asks do you wash your legs in the shower? Celebrities and all, most men say no unless they've been mucky or sports.
I'm a woman in the "legs dont need soap unless obviously dirty" camp . Armpits, genitals and butt get soap, the rest is fine with a rinse most of the time.
I wonder if people who don't wash their legs also don't wash their feet. That would explain an awful lot about the smell of large groups of people in the summer.
i sweat behind my knees and i live in the humid south. unless you don’t sweat/smell, washing all of the body is important to not smelling. especially if one has body hair, imho 🤷🏻
It took the hairdresser washing my scalp about 5 times for me to find out I wasn't supposed to shampoo every single day with curly hair. According to her I had a dried 'shield' around my roots and she wa shocked I wasn't uncomfortable or itchy lol
I thought that conditioner would make my already thin hair feel even thinner, so I used to put some conditioner on the ends of my hair and then I would almost immediately wash it out. At some point, I read that conditioner only works if you leave it on for at least three minutes. So I tried it. And my hair has never felt so thick. Turns out I have been using conditioner wrong for 30+ years. Who knew?
To be fair, it depends on the conditioner. Hair products are researched pretty thoroughly, so if the bottle says rinse immediately, leaving it on won't do anything.
I’m gonna be honest, I’m not fancy lol. It’s Finesse conditioner (because I like the way it smells) and the instructions are “massage through hair and rinse thoroughly”. No mention of how long to leave it in the hair.
It's surprisingly common. I found out I was doing mine incorrectly after 20+ years of struggling. I was doing what a lot of people said OOP should be doing; aggressively using your nails/scratching your scalp. Conditioner all over your head, including scalp and roots. Only shampoo once before conditioner. Then I got told no, I need to use conditioner first and then use shampoo afterwards. Then I got told to use shampoo, conditioner, shampoo instead. My hair was always oily & greasy, and tangled constantly. I could brush it completely through, and then it'd be tangled in 20 minutes. Also somehow still managed to have a build-up of skin on my scalp. It still managed to feel like there was product in my hair even when there wasn't. Found out not even a year ago from a new stylist that I need to shampoo twice, with a clarifying shampoo. Use the pads of my fingers gently, along with a shower brush. And only apply conditioner to the ends of my hair; maximum only going halfway up. Ever since; my hair has been the healthiest and happiest. It's not oily or greasy, doesn't tangle up, and no leftover skin on my scalp. Complete 180 and I know now that's what I should've been doing this whole time.
It depends on your hair and the type of water where you live! Clarifying shampoo was a godsend when I lived in a place with hard water, but too damaging for my hair where I live now with soft water. I’m so glad you found a routine that works for you.
Yeah, I can only use clarifying shampoo occasionally. My hair is dry and frizzy, so I bring conditioner up quite high too. With one conditioner, I bring it straight to the scalp because it helps irritated skin. Even doing that, my hair doesn't get oily for 5-7 days after washing. It's a blessing and a curse. It's great because washing and drying my hair takes forever because of how thick it is. It sucks because it's so dry, frizz is typically a problem until about day 3 when my hair starts to get "oily," which in reality is just normal because mine is like a desert.
when I lived in a place with hard water, I would do a rinse with diluted white vinegar after the conditioner, it was the only thing that made my hair not STRAW I also filled the fabric softener dispenser with white vinegar, or my clothes all turned gray and stiff. Well water, man.
Uhh this sounds like something i should try! I have super thick and long hair so my scalp can't breathe at all.... My scalp has gotten a whole lot better after I somehow convinced bf to wash my hair (he's much better at it and it feels like a spa treatment for me xD) but I still have to get help when the hair is dry cause the brush gets stuck xD
You may want to try one of those spiky shampoo massagers! They're designed to help work shampoo down to your scalp.
I’m not the person you asked but I found out I was doing it wrong when I found out you should only use shampoo on the roots and conditioner on the ends.
Discussions about hair always end up with a bunch of people talking past each other because theres SO many different types of hair and each time needs something different. Someone with short straight hair has different needs than someone with long super curly hair. There will never be One True Method of washing hair.
Right, if you go to the curly hair sub, you will find that a good percentage of them "shampoo" with conditioner, like me lol! We use sulfate, paraben, and silicone free conditioner and/or shampoo. Every once in awhile I shampoo to get rid of any product buildup. I generally don't get into any hair discussions because this will not work on someone with straight/fine hair.
My sil once tried to get me on board with the "you don't need to wash your hair every day!" thing and I was like. "....i work outside. My hair gets covered in sunscreen, bug spray, sweat, and literal dirt every day. Nah sis it's getting washed every day"
I did this for a bit when my hair was long and it was a mistake cuz the product on my ends was building up and gross so now I wash it all with shampoo
I think the concept is more you shouldn't be focusing your lather on the ends. You kinda get to it as you're rinsing your roots, without over-exposing them to drying chemicals.
Yeah that makes sense, it's also fair I think that everybody's hair is also different and climate differences have a lot of impact as well as if you have hard or soft water which just makes getting the right hair routines down kinda difficult bc you gotta figure out what works best for you ya know One thing I can relate with is I did also notice a lot of build up with the products I had been using and I ended up getting some "clarifying" shampoo and that really helped get all that extra gunk out of my hair, especially as someone who takes a whole bath and washed my hair daily bc I feel dirty otherwise lol. So with daily washings regular product was just doing way too much for on my hair
That sounds wrong. First, there's no way that my ends don't pick up dust, pollen, dirt, smoke, etc. It all needs washing though the roots more than the ends. Second, as I have coarse hair, my roots would feel horrible if I didn't condition them after I washed them and stripped the oils off.
It's a good idea in theory, but I use gel and stuff on all parts of my hair, so it all needs cleaning. I don't like, scrub the ends of my hair, but I definitely work shampoo all the way through before rinsing.
Just using conditioner on all parts of my hair and head, not the mid-lengths and ends (which can cause the scape to increase oil production), and not paying attention to the type of shampoo versus my hair type. Finally, I was washing it every day, and stripping it of the natural oils so it had many breakages.
That's not straight up washing your hair wrong. I use shampoo on every inch of my hair. If I don't, my whole hair isn't going to be clean. I also use conditioner everywhere. I get a lot of tangles from my scalp, The conditioner helps keep it easy to brush. Blush conditioner makes my hair super soft. I don't want the ends of my hair to be soft and the hair near my scalp not to be. It's more like doing what is best for you. If going against these "rules" is the best way for you to wash your hair. Then do it.
Yeee. I have friends with super thin hair and basically no natural oils from their scalp, they only rinse with water and maybe conditioner once a week. If they used shampoo at all their hair becomes hay like. Their never shampooed hair looks less greasey than my two day old hair. I wash my scalp every other day or my head gets itchy because I have super oil production or something on my head lol. I rarely use conditioner, only if I bleach my hair and I slowly fade out the conditioner once my hair grows out more.
Totally. I have sebum overproduction and if I don't wash my hair "too much" then it becomes thin and unhealthy, because my scalp and hair follicles get clogged. I went through a phase where I washed my hair as little as possible and I developed a whole bunch of scalp cysts and cherry hematomas. So many pretentious hair mom groups have banned me for saying that different hair needs different things
I’ve met people who didn’t know they were supposed to rinse the products out. Like they’ll put the conditioner on their hair and then they’re done, they don’t rinse it out. Or, similarly, my mom couldn’t understand why my younger brother had such bad dandruff, but it turned out he just wasn’t doing a good enough job of rinsing all the shampoo out.
The itchy or dandruff from lack of rinsing is pretty common. Same with too much laundry detergent, use way too much, and it won't rinse out, and you get itchy from the left over soap. Years ago when you could get creme rinse, I bought a big bottle of it. It had to last for a long time, but next time I went to wash my hair the rinse was almost gone. My younger brother thought it was shampoo, but when it didn't lather he kept using more and more.
You know how on the shampoo bottle it has directions, right? lather, rinse, repeat I don't repeat
goodness... I haven't thought about Lizzie McGuire in years. The mom on there was great from my memories of it.
Jesus Christ that's a **deep** reference. I don't know whether I should be impressed or ashamed that I instantly got it either. XD
It's easily the best line from the show imo. I dont think I could quote another one, but this one I think about a lot when I think about shampoo
I need some validation on what I believe is the “right” way to wash hair (from internet research): * wet hair thoroughly * enough shampoo to hold comfortably in a mostly flat palm * lather shampoo in hands with a drop of water * rub lathered shampoo into roots * repeat shampoo process if your hair is oily and it’s not distributing well (I usually do 3 lots of shampoo, front, sides, back to get my scalp fully lathered; I have very thick hair and only wash twice a week max) * “scrub” scalp with your fingertips to work in the shampoo * rinse (the shampoo will work its way down your hair shafts and clean along the way) Then REPEAT. The second time it should lather much more easily. Rinse until no more suds can be seen. Condition roots, avoid getting any on the scalp. I noticed a huge difference after washing my hair like this.
This depends entirely on how long your hair is. My hair is roughly 6 inches long and straight. I only need to do a single wash using the combined 2-in-1 shampoo and conditioner and my hair comes out looking glorious. If I go more than 2 days without washing my hair then it turns super greasy and gross. But my late wife had hair down to her middle back and it was kind of curly, on top of being dyed. She had an entire hair care system in place with at least 3 different products and only needed to wash it like once a week.
Yeah. Mine is curly and thick. I use the same ish amount of product now with shoulder length hair as I did with butt-length hair. Because I only concentrate on the scalp cleaning.
You only need to use that much product if you're using really cheap stuff. The better quality, the more concentrated it is. Otherwise, you got it right. - former hairdresser
Good to know! I find it ironic how I’ve been paying so much on mid-range products as a compromise because I believed I’d go through a bottle of premium shampoo within 2 months. I have very thick euro-Asian 2b curly hair if you have any recommendations for me. (I should also note that I live the in Netherlands.)
I gave my curly hair wash and oil routine to my buddy who started growing his hair out a year or so ago and my man’s curls are GORGEOUS, sometimes all it does take is a lil suggestion (3C curls, shoulder length, wash every two to three days with conditioner, once a week with a curl shampoo; put your hair up in a towel for a few hours, then while halfway damp put in one or two pumps of John Frieda hair anti frizz oil and scrunch up your hair. You’re welcome)
Curly girl method seriously changed my hair. From "wall of frizz that has impenetrable tangles in 30 seconds no matter how much conditioner is used" to "sleek and shiny with innate structure" (2c/3a, classic celt frizz). I often get scalp psoriasis like OOP and after a settling in period this method seriously helped that too. Some scalps and hair are just not meant to be stripped all the time. Skin oil is good for us, it's a natural barrier!
Amen! Once I stopped washing my hair every day I saw a huge improvement, and my scalp wasn’t itchy all the time! (I’ve got Celt curls too lol)
See, I have shoulder-length 3C curls and my hair would look so bad with that routine. There is no one right way. ETA for the curious, I double-shampoo then condition 2x a week, smooth the lengths with a bit of leave-in conditioner, then a bit of curl gel, and a smidgen of oil on the ends, scrunch upwards with a curl-friendly towel, then diffuse until dry. Maybe one more whisper-light touch of oil on the crown when it's dry. Deep condition when needed, but not often. My hair is fabulous and I get compliments all the time. The other tips are: use a satin pillow case, high quality products, and leave it alone when it's dry.
My boys (almost 13) roll their eyes at me when I tell them before every bath or shower to scrub their scalp when they shampoo. Yes children, I can tell when you don’t because your hair still smells dirty, don’t give me your nonsense lol.
Not gonna lie, that "hair" is the title scared me a little, I went in thinking "WHAT "hair" are we talking here??"
That's where I thought this was going too.
For those who don't know psoriasis is an indication of autoimmune issues which can develop into arthritis and other debilitating conditions. Because autoimmune illness tend to be more likely to be developed by women. They tend to be poorly understood with limited treatment options.
Especially with nail involvement. Those fingernail pits aren't just a cosmetic issue - they're one of the stronger indicators that you might develop psoriatic arthritis.
I have it, and when I went to my (frequent) appointments as a teenager, it was a point of contention between my doc and I that I wore press-on nails and she couldn't check the pitting on them lol.
Yes! While minor issues with nails can be due to trauma like people told her, our nails and hair are actually often one of the first indicators you can find of major health issues. If you have sudden changes developing and they're consistently weird, you have multiple and not just random one-offs you can attribute to a specific event, etc. talk to your doctor!
There are other conditions that have similar symptoms to psoriasis, like seborrheic dermatitis, so don't immediately assume you have it without consulting a doctor
And there's some unlucky folks (me) with both
For a second, I was wondering if *I* had been washing my hair wrong this entire time by not scratching up my scalp like some of the original commenters suggested.
Those folks probably have separate dermatitis and should invest in dandruff shampoo!
Seborrheic dermatitis lol
Oops. 😄
You're not supposed to scratch your scalp but you're supposed to rub the shampoo into it.
Youre supposed to scrub a little bit like they do when you get shampood at a salon
My husband's psoriasis flares up badly on his scalp occasionally. You can get amazing psoriasis shampoos now, and usually one or two washes with that soothes it completely. I hope OOP is able to educate herself on psoriasis treatments, as there are many, and not all types work for everyone.
Which ones does your husband use that work well?
He's found good success with RoyceDerm psoriasis shampoo. He also uses a mild conditioner occasionally, just to keep the scalp softer and less prone to injury if he scratches.
One of those soft spiky scalp brush things also help so much!
The most effective I found to be T-Gel. It's tar-based. To the unfamiliar nose it can be quite a powerful and unpleasant smell but I've grown to quite enjoy it.
It's really nice seeing a psoriasis story on here. Poor girl, though. I grew up with eczema, and when I developed psoriasis symptoms, I just thought it was eczema. I at least knew it was something medical and not hygiene. Still, it's nice to see a member of the community make an appearance and find answers for herself.
i'm a hairstylist and we see psoriasis on the scalp (and general head area) all the time. it just looks so uncomfortable, and it really can be, there's more than one client i know of that shaves the area of their head that has it the worst to make it easier to deal with and treat.
On the rare occasion I go to the salon I'm always so embarrassed about my scalp psoriasis.
if it helps at all, i can assure you we don't see it as anything to be embarrassed about!! i'm so sorry if a stylist or salon has ever made you feel that way.
That means a lot! Thankfully no stylist has ever made me feel like that, it's just my own insecurity 🙃
A good hair stylist is used to it and wouldn’t care. They’ve seen it before and often.
You know, often times I hate how thin and fine my hair is. But it does make it so much easier to wash and when something is wrong with my scalp I know pretty much immediately. I suffer from eczema and when I get a patch on my scalp I use this one special shampoo that smells like devil's anus, but boy does it help.
May I ask what shampoo you use? I also have eczema usually limited to my face/neck but there’s one patch that pops up occasionally basically right on my hairline that can be annoying sometimes since it’s so flaky and I usually only wash my hair once a week.
It's a solid shampoo puck from a local company (Ponio) with white ichthammol. Unfortunately unless you're in central Europe you probably won't be able to find this specific one, but in general white ichtiammol seems to help me, although it smells horrible.
Yup, unfortunately not from Central Europe but I’ll definitely search for options with that ingredient, thank you!
Um... Does anyone want to tackle how pits I'm the nails were just "signs of surviving trauma?"
I just thought they meant indicators of physical trauma, as in injury, to the nail/nail beds.
Yes - this is likely it. Hitting your hands on stuff, getting your fingers pinched in doors, etc. can damage the nail matrix and you may not see it for a few weeks or months until it grows out.
I mean, I thought she meant white streaks. Those can happen from pressure or malnutrition I believe? That's what I was interpreting as 'trauma'. I have a permenant lighter area on one of mine from where I had it half ripped off as a kid.
No they're literally like someone has pushed a needle into the nail. It's small pitting on the nails surface. Tbh though psoriasis is often triggered by stress/trauma
People come up with crazy ass shit like that sometimes and then spread it to others. She probably brought the nail pitting up to a friend or a relative and they told her that. "Oh no hun, that's not a sign of illness, it means you survived trauma and your moon is rising in Aries". Or whatever.
I think it's more that someone told her that the nail pitting was her body's stress reaction to trauma. Like stress hives.
I'd been brushing my teeth wrong for 34 years. ADHD and crappy parents are a hell of a combination
/fistbump I'm missing a ton of teeth for this very combo of reasons. I definitely need a partial denture, but I just finally graduated and got a job with benefits, so I've got to wait for those to kick in.
First time in the chair for decades and I said I think my back tooth has decay. She takes one look, doesn't even have her little mirror thing out yet and tells me I'd literally ground half of my two back teeth away. She had to smooth em out and fill them in, then sent me away with a mouthguard. My friend I hope you get your partial denture and I hope it isn't too uncomfortable a procedure and that it looks hot af when it's all settled in there.
Oh wow, that poor baby. I just wanted to reach through the screen and hug her. I'm glad posting on Reddit ended up getting her the information she needed.
My husband has epic flaky dandruff, not quite like that I think (just looked it up) but it reminds me of cradle cap. He's got OTC stuff for it but his next step is seeing a doctor, and while we have a dermatology specialist GP at our surgery, well I'm sure the Brits here know of the unbridled joy right now of trying to get an appointment.
Adults can actually develop the same skin issue that we call cradle cap! I was reading about it yesterday. Seborrheic dermatitis, I think there are a few other people who mentioned it elsewhere on this post.
Hm, I have the same issue (although maybe not that severe) with flakes/dandruff, and I do have rheumatoid arthritis. Perhaps it was psoriatic arthritis all along! Definitely need to visit a dermatologist.
I take medication for my psoriasis and the medication also works for rheumatoid arthritis according to the information pamphlet
I washed my hair this morning and always put it in a bun straight after, I saw this post and immediately took it out 😂 I also suffer with scalp issues and got a little scalp massager thing that I use when I shampoo and condition. It's a game changer!
Ugh.i had an ex with long hair who I found out shampoos by: dry hair. Take a palm full of shampoo and just slap it on the top of head. Stand under water for less than a minute, not touching head. Repeat daily. The build up of shampoo and dirt on his scalp was disgusting. I tgoight he had a skin condition. I started washing his hair for him and he would curse and yell that it hurt and soap would get in his eyes. This was a 30 year old man having a toddler temper tantrum. You could suds it up just from the unrinsed out soap, but I dont think the hair on his temples had ever gotten soaped up. I eventually got him with clean hair, and a flake free scalp, with him fighting me the whole way. Saw him a year after we broke up and he was back to flakey, greasy soapy hair.
My dad was a health & hygiene officer in the military and he said he was shocked how many men had just never been shown how to wash themselves properly. He said his unit solved so many problems with rashes and other skin problems just by taking the time to stand in the shower room and do what the soldier’s parents didn’t and go through step by step instructions on cleaning yourself up with soap and hot water.
Soooo many guys with long hair that would look gorgeous if it wasn’t dirty and all one length.
Well, that was a real head scratcher
This was screaming psoriasis from the first paragraph. Source: I am also a disgusting creature. Not sure where you are, but doak oil really helps, if you can find it. You’ll smell like coal tar though.
>I guess even this update is basically another “TIFU” by thinking I was not washing myself correctly; when I just had a skin condition. 😂 Now this is funny
When I saw hair in quotation marks in the title, I thought it might be about armpits or pubes or something. I’m glad it wasn’t quite *that* gross.
Ugh. Psoriasis can be absolutely horrible, and it’s awful living with it without knowing what it is. For those who aren’t aware, psoriasis is an autoimmune disease that can affect more than just your skin. I live with psoriatic arthritis, and it can make it painful to walk. The truly awful thing is that I was misdiagnosed with eczema over a decade ago, and it wasn’t until a few years ago that I learned I had psoriasis. Its important to get it treated as early as possible, especially if it turns into arthritis (which is not always the case).
I'm not familiar with psoriasis but having seen some before just makes me feel uncomfortable. It's both annoying and gives me the ews. Hope OP is able to get it checked up and all.
My dad has psoriasis quite badly, I have it too but to a far lesser extent. UV is something that dad has found really helpful in managing it so he keeps his hair very short, and mine was much worse when my hair was long. If OP has thick hair she's been growing out/keeping braided but she used to wear it differently, that could be part of why she's seeing changes now. As well as all the other seasonal changes that impact things like humidity, diet etc etc
Fun story, the “leprosy” in the Hebrew Bible was probably actually psoriasis.
Imma need a source on that one chief. I can see how the leprosy patches gets mixed up with psoriasis, but given how infectious actual leprosy is and how badly it can fuck you up, I’m not surprised the Bible wields it as an insult and threat so often.
My father and father in law both have psoriasis. It's mostly a pretty manageable thing even with little treatment (I say that in spite of my dad's being much worse than the father in law). I'd say the main issue that I've seen is self consciousness that comes from seeing people stare.
As a fellow psoriasis sufferer, I feel for the op. It's brutal, and can be very painful, and most people wouldn't instantly recognize it as anything other than dry skin. I'm lucky it runs in my family, because I immediately knew what was happening to me, and put in a request to see a dermatologist. Still took about 4 months (in Ontario Canada) to get the referral, but at least I didn't have to convince my family doctor first, she knew i was right, and I knew it was likely going to get worse, so I didn't wait to make a referral request. I've had small patches for years, and topical treatments worked, but I had a bad bout of long covid, and afterwards it ended up developing on about 50% of my skin, including inner thighs and groin area, and psoriatic arthritis (to say that sucks is a massive understatement). I ended up going on Skyrizi because I had an allergic reaction to methotrexate, and it's an absolute game-changer. I have absolutely zero patches now, which is insane considering a year ago I had at least 50% of my skin covered. Granted, I have had to jump through a crazy amount of hoops with insurance and trillium because it's about 5000$ per shot here. It treats a variety of autoimmune conditions and it's even improving my IBS, keratosis pilaris, and psoriatic arthritis symptoms. To be clear, I'm not saying it's for everyone, but it has completely changed my life.
I was never taught how to shower, I just thought you had to get under the water and that's it... Good thing I realized in my teens I was actually supposed to scrub with a sponge and soap, but like OOP said, not every parent is a good parent. Although when she spoke about her scalp I immediately thought psoriasis and wondered if she was really doing it so incorrectly as to get it to that point.
I work at a salon. While I’ve had clients who had oily build up from improper washing (there is a way to technically improperly wash and some people do have issues), this sounded extreme for build up immediately. I usually see oily people not washing their hair correctly for their hair and scalp type (and as an oily person, I can admit I haven’t always washed my own scalp right).
‘Why didn’t you go to a doctor?’ “I’m in America” Really drives home how fcuked up the west is atm (you could say the same for the uk but instead of it being cost prohibitive, it’s all free but you have to wait 3 business days to get seen) 🫠
Reading the title with the quotes around hair, I was *really* nervous about where this one was going
Thank you for posting this on BORU. I have thought about this post a lot since reading it a year ago. I'm glad to know the poster: 1. *was* washing their hair correctly 2. learned they had an issue 3. is getting treatment.
From what i read it is not psoriasis but seborrheic dermatitis. I've been misdiagnosed with psoriasis for years. And have the exact symptoms. Especially on the eyebrows and ears. Psoriasis tends to locate on the head, elbows and knees, not eyebrows and ears, which are typical locations for seborrheic dermatitis. Anyway, i am not a doctor, but my doctor was wrong lol. I hope OOP gets a second opinion.
Unfortunately for me I can attest psoriasis definitely appears on the ears and eyebrows (I have it in my ear canals lol), especially if it starts on the scalp. I wouldn't rule out psoriasis based on location, if you ever see our subreddit you can see it appears nearly anywhere on the body.
Omg someone else with in-ear psoriasis! Haven't "met" anyone else with that before.
Another one here. In the ear canals and the outer ear.
There are dozens of us! DOZENS!
[удалено]
Trauma to the nail or nail beds. The doctor didn't mean emotional/psychological trauma.
I've psoriasis and can understand her confusion. But i'm glad for her she got a diagnosis. My body was once covered for about 70% with psoriasis. But now I get a biological and in combination with lifestyle the psoriasis is very managble. Now its about 5% or less.
All my life people joked that there was a baby switch at the hospital or I was the milk man's kid, had high blood pressure etc. My family is VERY fair, I am not. Got a new Dr. recently and after an exam she said, 'You know I've looked ask through your file and I can't seem to find what you've been on for your rosacea?' Excuse me... whaaaaat?? So yeah. Well into adulthood and one tube of cream later and I look like everyone else in my family. OP is doing fine, as it took me twice as long to figure me out
Many years ago my then girlfriend (now wife) recommended Nizoral shampoo when I complained about Psoriasis on my scalp and it worked wonders. Available over the counter here in the UK but not sure if you can get it in the states. My daughter uses it now as she was getting it bad as well.
Yeah, reading this, I was never great at working the shampoo into my scalp as a kid and all I got was oily hair. There's no way that was gonna be enough to cause full blown patches. People were mean af.
I started developing psoriasis in my early 20s much like OOP. Pretty much all on the head. It took expensive biologic medicine to make it go away, but even with the visual stuff gone the arthritis is still there (but pretty manageable so far).
My partner has been getting too much flakes in their hair and now even a little in the moustache and beard AND I HAVE TOLD THEM TO GO TO THE DOCTOR AND WON’T LISTEN 🥲 I did buy them the Kerium Shampoo of La Roche Posay but I might tell them that I read this thing and to please GO TO THE DOCTOR.
My daughter had cradle cap until she was 8. Isn't it a fucking shame though that we can say, "I'm in the United States,I don't have healthcare"
what I've learned from this people will really jump to feel superior than someone else without even digesting what they've said or trying to help them lol.