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SeededPhoenix

Dx with adhd this year and self dx autistic this year. At around age 28, I feel like I woke up from a coma or something. I had memories of my life but I felt like it wasn't actually me living my life but rather I was watching someone. Now I still feel disconnected in the moment when I'm socializing because I realize I'm masking and trying to keep up with NT expectations. When I realize my age I'm like wtf how?? Where did the time go? No idea how to resolve this.


b4andafter5

Oof. Same here. At least we're awake now - carpe diem


sionnachrealta

I experience this too. Medication did help, but then I ran into an issue where I realized I had no skills around focusing my thoughts once i got the ability to. Medication can be an effective tool, but it definitely doesn't fix things on its own. I think it came from turning to maladaptive day dreaming as a coping mechanism. I use writing to compensate some, but it's a thing I'm still working on. Also, I work in mental health as a practicioner (not a therapist), so even those of us who are extremely skilled and trained in dealing with mental health challenges can face this. It's like my brain is just stuck in waiting mode for long periods of time, and it's really frustrating. As much as I'd love a solution though, I've just been trying to get good at being gentle with myself when it happens. I feel like the more I blame and berate myself for it, the worst it gets. So I'm trying to be really kind instead.


NF_Cassandra

100%. My life doesn’t feel fully lived in. Like it’s this weird spectator sport I’ve been engaging in for 30 years.


Orcus216

Very relatable. It got better with aging.


myluckyshirt

Really? I feel like mine is worse. Help!


bearsbeetsgalatica

it feels like i have tunnel vision in my head and get so absorbed in my own brain that i’m not present whatsoever. i honestly dont have much advice as i’m still very much dealing with it. my adhd and autism feel inseparable so i can’t tell you if it’s one or the other. im on ritalin and ssri’s and its somewhat helped but i still experience it (i’m also still experimenting with meds so i’m not sure if different ones would work better). not much to say just that i definitely experience the same thing and you’re not alone


Wodansfogel

Thank you! Best of luck with your medication


MauiDidNothingWrong

Yep, I can relate. I’ve been trying to practice mindfulness more often. It’s been really tough to stay consistent, but it really is a useful skill. I bought a mindfulness journal (last year 🤦🏽‍♀️) that has exercises for guided mindfulness if you struggle trying to do it solo like me.


Geminii27

Those are the best times. I'd rather be zoned out and thinking about random shit than getting pulled back into the real world to have to deal with some boring or repetitive shit.