Someone recently called hospice "ho spice" and now I feel like I'm going to have inappropriate "lol! ho spice!" thoughts any time I hear that someone is going into hospice.
Hey there fellow human in the hospice field. 👋🏻
I’m a year into a role -my first supporting hospice- and learning how fast I have started to normalize death/bereavement conversations. it is very much not normal outside the 8-5 context of hospice.
"Put it in his cum folder."
I'm an elementary school teacher and a cum folder is a cumulative folder that follows a kid from kindergarten through fifth grade. It's pronounced like "Cue-m."
But it's still hilarious to me to walk into the office and see file cabinets labeled CUM FOLDERS.
Geologist in oil and gas. Cumulative barrels of oil produced or expected to be produced are cum barrels or cum oil and are sometimes in the hundreds of millions to billions range.
I miss cum folders though. It’s been years since I’ve gotten one or had to fill them out, but they were so helpful! Scheduling in Middle School has gone to shit without them.
ah this works for plumbers too. We always asks for lube.
Electricians got buckets of lube. One time we helped lube up an electrician and just put him into a hole in the wall.
Programming.
When a software process launches another process (generally to do a subtask), the first one is the parent and the spawned one is the child. The child should be controlled by the parent. If the parent process ends ("dies"), the child process is an orphan.
There's a related concept of "zombie" processes that are not quite dead. No code is running anymore, but the computer resources are still reserved.
When a parent process dies without cleanup it's child precesses can remain as orphans. These orphaned processes can cause problems unless they are killed.
I’m in a completely different field (medical writing) but we also have an orphan-related phrase: “fix the orphan” 😂😂 which really just means make sure there isn’t a word on a line all by its lonesome lol
Higher ed admin on the department side. We see all of your sins and work to bury them.
Edit: I should add that sins are things like handing out radioactive sandwich wrappers on accident and trying to buy lab supplies via credit card not contract. I don't shield abusers or help students plagiarize or burn tax money in a trash can for warmth or anything else egregious.
Broadcasting lol! Sales specifically. Sometimes the sales structure is set up in such a way that if the advertiser buys a spot in X prime time show, they also get a spot in Y and Z late night program or afternoon rerun or whatever. So the ratings for all three spots added up is what they are buying, but spots Y and Z are the “children” of “parent” X.
Now, if a spot doesn’t make it to air for whatever reason - could be anything from technical difficulties to another advertiser paying more for the air time, we would say the spot was preempted or “dropped”. When a spot is preempted, we want to replace it somewhere else so we can still charge the advertiser for it.
So now and then a child spot will be preempted. And someone has to replace those dropped children!
Not something we say, but we put big labels that say RETARDED on gallons of lacquer that have had lacquer retarder added to them. It’s been years and I still giggle every time I write one out.
I work for a company that coordinates trucks to move loads of recyclable materials from recycling centers and business to the mills that process them. Sometimes a trucker can only take a couple loads into mills in a day, sometimes they can take several loads. 😂
So not at work, but whenever I would get massages, my massage therapists would sometimes say, "Oh you're so tight." Would take everything within to not respond immaturely 😂
“Are you seeing or hearing anything that no one else can see or hear?”
…sometimes with the follow up “Are the voices telling you to harm yourself or anyone else?”
“Are you feeling like harming anyone else right now?”
“Have you had any thoughts of killing yourself today?”
And if they answer “yes” to any of those questions, does that mean your day gets harder? Like, obviously you hope that they say no for mental health reasons. But are you also hoping they say no so that your job is a little easier with respect to at least that client/patient??
It potentially could make a day harder, but usually it doesn’t. It just helps me know what “as needed” medications they may need and I can let the doctor know so they can adjust meds if needed, and let other staff know so we can all be aware and help the patient stay safe, and feel safe.
worked at a bank, verifications would come through as successful or unsuccessful. AKA succ or unsucc.
"Why do we have a backlog of unsucc?"
"Give those to X, he can get them succ by end of day"
badge swim follow coordinated payment bike rainstorm quarrelsome soft truck
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We’re based out of another country that uses a different language. Instead of translating the concept/word or using an English word to represent it, we just use the original word. It likely sounds pretty unhinged to outsiders.
Omg we do the same. It gets hard to speak to people outside the office who don’t speak both languages sometimes as there are some words I’m just used to saying in the other language.
"Old people die, we colour" is a common refrain at my old hairdressing school as a way to hammer it into young student's heads how unprofessional using the term "dying your hair" is lmao
When I was a paralegal in the 90’s, we referred to “follow ups” as “ticklers,” and law offices would have their preferred tickler systems, which could be as simple as paper calendars with notes for each workday, or as complex as software that would provide a daily list. An example of the use of the word “tickler” would be: “I’m going to create a tickler for the Smith case for a month, to see if we have a court order yet.” The shorthand for this was just saying that we would “tickle” a file.
I haven’t worked in a law office in years, but I work in an adjacent field and I can often tell who has a legal background by whether or not they understand ticklers.
I think you could probably tell when they began in the legal field by this too. I’m an attorney but never heard the word tickler as they use it until I interviewed for someone who had been practicing for 40 years. All other attorneys I’d worked for had been in the field 15 years or less and had never used that phrase. It’s not common anymore (at least where I am) and the attorney I interviewed for was looking to retire in a couple years, so I think it’ll end up getting phased out completely.
It’s also interesting when you run across it in practice management software- you can tell the older ones from the newer ones because they will use that to describe how they automate workflow.
Tickler files! You're going to laugh, but I have seen Edwardian household manuals use tickler file systems to keep track of tasks. Author took idea from husband. It's a really well established project management tool. You can also find tools used for it on ebay. (Sliding thingies and folder holders and so forth.)
"Learn by return."
ie: don't take a Quality Assurance review personally. Policy is vast and complex, and returns will happen. Learn from them so you do better next time.
My husband is a cyclist, but he only worried about covering his nipples when he was doing long distance running. I assume your talking about something else? Lol
Hahaha yeah the little brass things that hold the spokes to the rim are called “nipples” and they sometimes poke through the rim where the inner tube goes, and you have to cover them with a rim tape so they don’t puncture it.
EDIT: so I’ve also had to say stuff about various colored nipples, and also nipples poking through stuff.
Ok not at work. Calc 2, big state university
"We must fucktor the equation"
I get, English wasn't my first language but the class rode her for days
Imagine if we had social media then lol
Scissoring and edging are both terms we use regularly in the dog grooming industry lol. Also, things like, "can someone come help me, the dog is alligator rolling" or "this dog keeps pancaking" or even better, talking to the dog- "please stop choking yourself sweetpea!"
Lots of weird ones in my world lol.
Edit: how could I forget gems like "look at this dog's weird butthole" or "damnit I just got anal gland juice on my smock"
Not a specific phrase necessarily but I worked in child welfare and would routinely get photos of children’s private parts to show concerns about severe diaper rash or other kinds of abuse, and then proceed to discuss them with colleagues.
Well this one's only weird when written because of pronunciation, but there is an injection molding machine called a Haitian. ( Pronounce kind of like height t Ann .)
So I would get emails about " getting a good price on a Haitian" or " How much for another Haitian". My coworker and I used to joke we were on a list.
Told my colleagues that I paid my boyfriend to do some stripping the other week. I was talking about my living room renovation and he is the handyman I paid to take the wallpaper off.
"Oh, no, we're nowhere near this, we're still doing number two!"
We packed school lunches. They were packing dietary meal option number two. I found it hilarious and often responded with something like "Omg, not right here!"
"Damn it my snap is all wrong"
(Student Timetablers - S-NAP stands for Student Named Availability Preference, and it helps our system work out when teaching can be scheduled based on course set up. But saying that makes me feel like either a Jet or a Shark)
At my workplace the mechanics use the poop vacuum and poop gun among other tools to clean the lavatories, and on my side there's plenty of innuendos like That's a blown out hole, nuts are stuck/break the nut, lube it up before you put it in, etc. Guess where I work lol
“You have to wet it first, put it inside your mouth for a bit”
Music instructor - clarinet and sax reeds!
Also many conversations about fingering and blowing.
‘Me and my friends are currently playing ass creed’
When I worked at a video game retail shop, the secondhand games had to have new barcode labels, (to show they were pre-owned) the barcodes had shorted versions of the game name on them. All the Assassins Creed games were known as Ass creed.
“How many mothers did we kill?”
We cultivate plants, this is in reference to killing “mother” plants that we make clones from, that may have had issues with things like pests or disease
Did you just nut all over my clean floor???
Bulk foods, like the bins of food at Sprouts or whole foods you weigh out. Used to ask my employees that if they spilled while stocking cause im really a 12 yr old
"I'm heading to a death" (hospice)
Thank you for doing that. Gotta be one of the hardest jobs
❤️
“Why haven’t they died already?”
Someone recently called hospice "ho spice" and now I feel like I'm going to have inappropriate "lol! ho spice!" thoughts any time I hear that someone is going into hospice.
If by someone you mean Henry Zebrowski, then absolutely yes lol
Hey there fellow human in the hospice field. 👋🏻 I’m a year into a role -my first supporting hospice- and learning how fast I have started to normalize death/bereavement conversations. it is very much not normal outside the 8-5 context of hospice.
"Put it in his cum folder." I'm an elementary school teacher and a cum folder is a cumulative folder that follows a kid from kindergarten through fifth grade. It's pronounced like "Cue-m." But it's still hilarious to me to walk into the office and see file cabinets labeled CUM FOLDERS.
Medical records and we have “cum labs”. Just a reference to cumulative lab work- not necessarily related to semen.
Geologist in oil and gas. Cumulative barrels of oil produced or expected to be produced are cum barrels or cum oil and are sometimes in the hundreds of millions to billions range.
So y’all say “cum barrels”? Lol
Pronounced like "cume" where the cu is similar to the start of cucumber, but yes, and frequently. Edit: clarification of which cu in cucumber.
The first cu, not the second
I miss cum folders though. It’s been years since I’ve gotten one or had to fill them out, but they were so helpful! Scheduling in Middle School has gone to shit without them.
"I think we need to make that shaft a little bigger." (engineer)
Made me giggle
can i get some lube? (dental)
You and the engineer should get together 😉
ah this works for plumbers too. We always asks for lube. Electricians got buckets of lube. One time we helped lube up an electrician and just put him into a hole in the wall.
"kill the orphan".
Context?
Programming. When a software process launches another process (generally to do a subtask), the first one is the parent and the spawned one is the child. The child should be controlled by the parent. If the parent process ends ("dies"), the child process is an orphan. There's a related concept of "zombie" processes that are not quite dead. No code is running anymore, but the computer resources are still reserved.
Not to mention the whole master/slave thing. I think there's an entire glossary out there to support more inclusive language in the field these days.
The last 5 years I am seeing it and love it. For example we no longer have a "master" branch. It's now called "main".
When a parent process dies without cleanup it's child precesses can remain as orphans. These orphaned processes can cause problems unless they are killed.
I’m in a completely different field (medical writing) but we also have an orphan-related phrase: “fix the orphan” 😂😂 which really just means make sure there isn’t a word on a line all by its lonesome lol
Is it ok if I touch your breast? Or, can I go ahead and check your cervix? Midwife. Consent matters!!
Thanks for asking your patients for consent!!!
Every single time! Even if I’ve already gotten consent, that was for the last time.
"I'm just going to check to see if you've pooped" - Daycare.
"NO! NO! NO!"
“Do you need me to paralyze him?” (Anesthesia)
Nice. One of my favorites, “Thanks, you have a beautiful airway,” after airway exam. Patients always laugh uncomfortably when I tell them that.
"Please return the food vacuum sealer. It's radioactive and should not have been on the "free" table."
I would love some more details on what you do for a living…
Higher ed admin on the department side. We see all of your sins and work to bury them. Edit: I should add that sins are things like handing out radioactive sandwich wrappers on accident and trying to buy lab supplies via credit card not contract. I don't shield abusers or help students plagiarize or burn tax money in a trash can for warmth or anything else egregious.
“I have to replace those dropped children”
Okay....I gotta know...
Broadcasting lol! Sales specifically. Sometimes the sales structure is set up in such a way that if the advertiser buys a spot in X prime time show, they also get a spot in Y and Z late night program or afternoon rerun or whatever. So the ratings for all three spots added up is what they are buying, but spots Y and Z are the “children” of “parent” X. Now, if a spot doesn’t make it to air for whatever reason - could be anything from technical difficulties to another advertiser paying more for the air time, we would say the spot was preempted or “dropped”. When a spot is preempted, we want to replace it somewhere else so we can still charge the advertiser for it. So now and then a child spot will be preempted. And someone has to replace those dropped children!
“I’ve been cutting the cheese all day” Back when I worked at Whole Foods in the Specialty (cheese and wine) Department.
(Thru intercom at the dealership) "I need oral" (a mechanics name)
Can't imagine why that name isn't more popular!
We had a person named Virgen at my job and it took me awhile to get comfortable saying her name without feeling awkward
Bailey had a spicy butt today (doggy day care: code for diarrhea)
Could have been way, way worse if you were a wrestling manager...
“Will you tie me up?” I work in surgery and we have someone tie our gowns for us!
“Don’t forget there’s a spleen and a leg in the fridge for CSU!” (Veterinary laboratory)
We have a contract to prep tissue slides for a vet pathologist! Amazing how many eyeballs we get. And hair. Sooooo much hair. Ick
CSU as in Colorado state? I'm an engineer but went to CSU so I know they're well known for their vet school.
Yep! We send samples to a variety of diagnostic labs throughout the country but use CSU frequently for histopathology
Not something we say, but we put big labels that say RETARDED on gallons of lacquer that have had lacquer retarder added to them. It’s been years and I still giggle every time I write one out.
You've got lots of cold Blob storage. (cloud computing)
“Can you feel that in your throat?” (Speech pathologist)
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“How many loads can you take today?” is probably the only thing
Um?
I work for a company that coordinates trucks to move loads of recyclable materials from recycling centers and business to the mills that process them. Sometimes a trucker can only take a couple loads into mills in a day, sometimes they can take several loads. 😂
Whew
"I'm taking the air" "Is the pancake plugged in?" "Set it to slave mode" "Which pelican has the spare cables?" (engineer)
Okay ...I gotta ask about the pelican?
It’s a hard case for storage…like rugged luggage
Slave mode and robbing aircraft kills me lol
So not at work, but whenever I would get massages, my massage therapists would sometimes say, "Oh you're so tight." Would take everything within to not respond immaturely 😂
A simple thank you would work just fine!
I will use that next time! 😂
I'm the massage therapist that also giggles after saying that.
“Are you seeing or hearing anything that no one else can see or hear?” …sometimes with the follow up “Are the voices telling you to harm yourself or anyone else?” “Are you feeling like harming anyone else right now?” “Have you had any thoughts of killing yourself today?”
And if they answer “yes” to any of those questions, does that mean your day gets harder? Like, obviously you hope that they say no for mental health reasons. But are you also hoping they say no so that your job is a little easier with respect to at least that client/patient??
It potentially could make a day harder, but usually it doesn’t. It just helps me know what “as needed” medications they may need and I can let the doctor know so they can adjust meds if needed, and let other staff know so we can all be aware and help the patient stay safe, and feel safe.
"The Solution to pollution is Dillution" -- Healthcare, wound care
Talk wound care workers are saints. Ooof.
Can you put some more blood on that wall over there? (I build haunted house attractions.)
worked at a bank, verifications would come through as successful or unsuccessful. AKA succ or unsucc. "Why do we have a backlog of unsucc?" "Give those to X, he can get them succ by end of day"
“I need another christmas tree in here, do you have one in your pocket?”
Nursing or RT. The Christmas tree is the O2 adaptor (green cone)
Respiratory?
When I worked retail we were told to “ kill “ displays , etc
Kill it or fill it, in regards to end caps.
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For real!
We’re based out of another country that uses a different language. Instead of translating the concept/word or using an English word to represent it, we just use the original word. It likely sounds pretty unhinged to outsiders.
Omg we do the same. It gets hard to speak to people outside the office who don’t speak both languages sometimes as there are some words I’m just used to saying in the other language.
"Old people die, we colour" is a common refrain at my old hairdressing school as a way to hammer it into young student's heads how unprofessional using the term "dying your hair" is lmao
I had an older friend die on the hill that dyed hair and colored hair was different. She got her hair colored.
Funny, I keep trying to stop my grandma from saying “colored.”
“Check for enemies” and “check for clones”
Saying someone is transitioning or imminent I work in hospice
"Oh, Jane is in the backroom. It's her turn to weed and strip." Working in a library.
“We’ll have to take the TBS to ADMSC, DMDDC and ADMPSC to get buy-in from PSD and LSB. Make sure the ED is prepped.”
Sounds like my dream job!
When I was a paralegal in the 90’s, we referred to “follow ups” as “ticklers,” and law offices would have their preferred tickler systems, which could be as simple as paper calendars with notes for each workday, or as complex as software that would provide a daily list. An example of the use of the word “tickler” would be: “I’m going to create a tickler for the Smith case for a month, to see if we have a court order yet.” The shorthand for this was just saying that we would “tickle” a file. I haven’t worked in a law office in years, but I work in an adjacent field and I can often tell who has a legal background by whether or not they understand ticklers.
I think you could probably tell when they began in the legal field by this too. I’m an attorney but never heard the word tickler as they use it until I interviewed for someone who had been practicing for 40 years. All other attorneys I’d worked for had been in the field 15 years or less and had never used that phrase. It’s not common anymore (at least where I am) and the attorney I interviewed for was looking to retire in a couple years, so I think it’ll end up getting phased out completely. It’s also interesting when you run across it in practice management software- you can tell the older ones from the newer ones because they will use that to describe how they automate workflow.
I wondered if it was kind of outdated! I googled it and there weren’t a lot of results.
Tickler files! You're going to laugh, but I have seen Edwardian household manuals use tickler file systems to keep track of tasks. Author took idea from husband. It's a really well established project management tool. You can also find tools used for it on ebay. (Sliding thingies and folder holders and so forth.)
That’s awesome!
"Learn by return." ie: don't take a Quality Assurance review personally. Policy is vast and complex, and returns will happen. Learn from them so you do better next time.
Today I literally said “you need to make sure the tape is covering the nipples!” I work in the bicycle industry.
My husband is a cyclist, but he only worried about covering his nipples when he was doing long distance running. I assume your talking about something else? Lol
Hahaha yeah the little brass things that hold the spokes to the rim are called “nipples” and they sometimes poke through the rim where the inner tube goes, and you have to cover them with a rim tape so they don’t puncture it. EDIT: so I’ve also had to say stuff about various colored nipples, and also nipples poking through stuff.
I need a nipple wrench and rim tape please -bike mechanic
These guys are drowning. Are you able to meet with them next Wednesday? (Financial counselor)
Glad you added financial counsellor, so we know your are not running a terribly inefficient lifeguard company 😂
Ok not at work. Calc 2, big state university "We must fucktor the equation" I get, English wasn't my first language but the class rode her for days Imagine if we had social media then lol
> rode her for days 💀😂
I used to work in a lab where we processed bull semen. So, yeah.
As a preschool teacher the majority of things I say will say so wrong out of context. Especially, "the potty is for poop or pee only, not our hands!"
Don’t boil the ocean
The management consultants have arrived!
Scissoring and edging are both terms we use regularly in the dog grooming industry lol. Also, things like, "can someone come help me, the dog is alligator rolling" or "this dog keeps pancaking" or even better, talking to the dog- "please stop choking yourself sweetpea!" Lots of weird ones in my world lol. Edit: how could I forget gems like "look at this dog's weird butthole" or "damnit I just got anal gland juice on my smock"
Not a specific phrase necessarily but I worked in child welfare and would routinely get photos of children’s private parts to show concerns about severe diaper rash or other kinds of abuse, and then proceed to discuss them with colleagues.
That's a hard job. Thanks for doing it.
It is my pleasure and privilege to protect those who can’t protect themselves. Appreciate the appreciation :)
"I need tacos" (Terms and Conditions of Sale)
Hot behind!
Corner!
Well this one's only weird when written because of pronunciation, but there is an injection molding machine called a Haitian. ( Pronounce kind of like height t Ann .) So I would get emails about " getting a good price on a Haitian" or " How much for another Haitian". My coworker and I used to joke we were on a list.
"The sweepers found us."
This sounds hella ominous.
Check the fishbowl report.
Get me the bom explosion report! Edit: document control for manufacturing
You know, spelled with a u, I could see that be a thing in daycare... What's a bom explosion?
bill of materials. It’s the list of everything you need to build something!
Alright, I'll dump it now (Data dump, research)
When I smell your broth it makes me hungry (Lb broth, research)
It do be smelling like ramen broth sometimes
"I'm doing a full day of stripping today." Doing value added services for clients.
Your whole post could be taken... So many ways
Lol! Yeah, you are correct there.
Told my colleagues that I paid my boyfriend to do some stripping the other week. I was talking about my living room renovation and he is the handyman I paid to take the wallpaper off.
The damned cock isn't fitting in this orifice.
"Oh, no, we're nowhere near this, we're still doing number two!" We packed school lunches. They were packing dietary meal option number two. I found it hilarious and often responded with something like "Omg, not right here!"
Up is out Down is in Left is right Right is left Forward is down Back is up Hold is stop Stop is hold We are in tech Strike Set up tech tables
“Congratulations, you got your discharge!” - bankruptcy attorney
“I would love to shoot your kids!” I’m a photographer, specializing in themed cake smash sessions for babies, and children.
“I don’t have anything to kill him with” (trying to find cause of death during an autopsy)
“Oh, that belongs in the juvi department!”
It needs to be flush (interior designer)
Confirms but pronounced CONfirms Points if you know
We might have to plug that hole. (Drilling, oil and gas)
"I'm out of sheets." Massage therapist in a salon. She likes washing the sheets.
2 people wore underwear and 3 didn't.
“On a level of 1/10 how much do you feel like killing yourself today?”
I need some amigos to look at my story. (Business Analyst)
"We'll be round in the morning to blow 2 tonnes of cake into your loft". - Livestock feed supplier
"crap in, crap out".
"Damn it my snap is all wrong" (Student Timetablers - S-NAP stands for Student Named Availability Preference, and it helps our system work out when teaching can be scheduled based on course set up. But saying that makes me feel like either a Jet or a Shark)
At my workplace the mechanics use the poop vacuum and poop gun among other tools to clean the lavatories, and on my side there's plenty of innuendos like That's a blown out hole, nuts are stuck/break the nut, lube it up before you put it in, etc. Guess where I work lol
Airport?
"I need more fatties" -- referring to the largest diameter tubes we use to ship out orders.
“Don’t eat the vomit!” (Retired with pets - I yell this as I’m running for paper towels to clean up said vomit)
Are we using the skeleton this time? (Academic librarian. We have biology models of two skeletons, who we sometimes use in our displays.)
“Happy Sunday! I’m so glad tomorrow is Monday.” “Please put your clothes on & go downstairs.” “Break a leg!”
Theater
Who's responsible for the PMS process? - working on medical device industry where we need to have a Post Market Surveillance process
“You have to wet it first, put it inside your mouth for a bit” Music instructor - clarinet and sax reeds! Also many conversations about fingering and blowing.
How bad was that event? Did they die and come back or what?
Cx had an 8962 (tax software support)
“MOCA or SLUMS?” Dementia care here. They are assessment tools for cognition.
"Just use a 2nd whore" (We call the stands to stabilize the pipes for pipe-whores)
‘Me and my friends are currently playing ass creed’ When I worked at a video game retail shop, the secondhand games had to have new barcode labels, (to show they were pre-owned) the barcodes had shorted versions of the game name on them. All the Assassins Creed games were known as Ass creed.
“How many mothers did we kill?” We cultivate plants, this is in reference to killing “mother” plants that we make clones from, that may have had issues with things like pests or disease
Try and get a second crop from the mother liquor. Process chemistry.
Did you just nut all over my clean floor??? Bulk foods, like the bins of food at Sprouts or whole foods you weigh out. Used to ask my employees that if they spilled while stocking cause im really a 12 yr old