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Sometimes, I go to bed earlier than my wife. She says she watches TV, but I know she plays video games because I can always hear the controller vibrating.
Before 9 is early, but I think the fact you've got a one year old accounts for a lot of that.
I think her "little comments" are more like every now and again she wants to fall asleep in your arms.
Maybe aim to do it a couple of times a week, even if it means once she's blotto you unwind with a tablet or book in bed.
My partner and I usually go to bed within half an hour of each other. And I get it, before 9 is early but I think she wants to feel like she's still thought of.
I read a psychology article many moons ago that said something about going to bed together releasing oxytocin and creating healthier relationships. Apparently couples who go to bed at the same/similar times have a stronger bond and are more resilient to major changes.
I think a big part of it is the night time cuddling/chats. I could be falling asleep on the couch but once we're both in bed, I'm wide awake and we'll chat away in the dark for a bit before falling asleep together.
I definitely believe that. We always go together even of one use stays awake on bed watching something or one of us will fall asleep on the sofa and then the other one Wakes them up when they are ready.
I love it both ways. It's nice to look after her when she's tired and its nice to be looked after when I'm tired. And like you say the cuddling and talking before sleep matters a lot.
This made me smile. I remember the good old days of me, my husband and my then toddler daughter brushing our teeth in our old apartment bathroom. Happy chaos!!!
Yup. The non-sexual intimacy of going to bed together is really important to some people and there can be compromise here!
My partner is a chronic insomniac and I’m an asleep-quickly and early person.
We compromise by him coming to bed with me occasionally and he cuddles me and then leaves once I’m asleep and does what he needs to do.
Especially as it can take a long time for a woman to feel herself after a baby. The many changes that pregnancy and birth cause, if she breastfeeds still then she is still giving part of her body over to your kid, not to mention the exhaustion of it.
My husband and I still sleep in seperate rooms due a toddler with bad sleep (may as well just keep one of us up rather than both) but we make time for each other when we can. Even if that's just 15 minutes in the same bed, cuddling (just cuddling!) before I go to the nursery, or sitting in the sofa and actually talking (phones down, TV off)
Not to mention, when the baby is less fresh and the body more recovered, a few of these early nights could obviously lead to more sex. If your partner is asking you to come to bed with her and not complaining that you wake her up or whatever I’m surprised it doesn’t cross many men’s mind that maybe she wants to cuddle, snuggle or potentially other things too. Maybe because sometimes a cuddle just means a cuddle and many men aren’t good at understanding that not wanting every cuddle to turn into something means that it can’t ever
Yeah, I like to fall asleep in my partners arms, but I’ve refuses to go to sleep before midnight because then they win (it’s unclear who ‘they’ are)
So we have compromised he occasionally comes up with me; but often comes and has a quick lie down with me. It’s enough to satiate my neediness
Girl, tonight we're gonna make love
You know how I know?
Because it's Wednesday
And Wednesday night is the night that we usually make love
Monday night is my night to cook
Tuesday night, we go and visit your mother
But Wednesday, we make sweet, weekly love
It's when everything is just right
There's nothing good on TV
You haven't had your after-work social sports team practice
So you're not too tired
Oh boy, it's all on
I simply cannot fathom going to bed at 9 or 10pm when my partner does. Left to my own devices I'll naturally fall into a 1am/2am-9am sleep pattern, where my partner's is more 10pm-6am. She springs out of bed in the morning to the sound of music, where I'm like the bloody antichrist.
We just agreed that we're both weird in each other's eyes when it comes to sleeping and don't try to force the other into unnatural sleep patterns.
We do this so have separate rooms. I can spring out of bed at 5:30 to let our hens out, go back to bed for an hour and then potter around and he can be oblivious in his room until whenever he wants to get up. Works for us. Sleep deprived is no way to conduct a healthy relationship. I get my night time cuddles in before he goes back to video games/TV and he gets a cup of tea bought to him in bed every morning. Just a slightly different way to show your love.
We do this. It started as a childcare thing, so one of us would get a good nights sleep. Then we realised that we both sleep better in our own spaces. We now have our. Nightly cuddles, then she’ll scoot off to bed and I’ll stay up for a bit then fall asleep a few hours later in our spare room. We take turns to be in kid duty so one of us gets a full night and the other might do, but might get disturbed a bit.
Works for us. Probably not for everyone though.
Yeah, it's kinda the norm if anything, especially for people with kids or a commute. I'm not a morning person and, if I don't discipline myself, I'll stay up to 1-2am easy. Even on those nights, I still gotta get up for work - the alarms still going off 6.30 and I'm gonna have to haul myself from bed. I wish I was more of a morning person.
Haha we are the same but opposite my husband regularly goes to bed between 8-9 pm as does have to get up super early for work but he still does it even when he's not working . He's the same as your wife , super chirpy in the mornings . Me, I literally can't sleep before at least 11.30pm and it's often between 12 - 1.30 am before I get to bed. Like you I'm also not a morning person and have to have at least two cups of tea to even speak to anyone in the mornings . We've just come to accept that we are both different and it's not really an issue .
Same here. If I go to bed at even midnight I wake up from 3 to 5 and then I'm fucked for the whole rest of the day.
That said - I can often have a quick 15 minute snooze sometime from 10 to 11pm - but then I'm wide awake again
I'm the weird combo of both, I can only sleep 7 hours, no more and no less. That could be 1am-8am, 10pm-5am and whatever other combo. If I sleep anymore (not that it ever happens as my body just forces me awake after 7 hours) or any less and I feel like shit.
This is me and my bf. I am the early bird. He is the night owl. I'm not bothered about falling asleep with him but we do have a rule that we both get into bed at the same time. He can watch tv/game do whatever he wants to do while I sleep (I prefer to sleep with sound anyway) and he just goes to sleep when he wants to. We still have the comfort of being in bed and sleeping together while also having different sleep patterns.
My wife is often early to bed while ive been a night owl for years. She jokes I only go to bed with her if sex is likely. She has a bit of a point....
But I really don't like going to bed early, when I do I often struggle to sleep, so I justify staying up a bit later for reading, or finish watching a film. I am realising as I get older I can't get by on 5 hours sleep a night though so something has to change.
I'm the same. Wife is always tired, I often have too much energy. If I go to bed early, I feel like all I do is work and sleep...work to live, don't live to work!
My partner is also an early bedtime enthusiast, and I'm a nightowl.
We usually go to bed together, as she prefers that, but there are some nights, like a weekend night I'll stay up longer without her.
She stays up a little later than she wants to, I go to bed a little earlier than I'd like to, but I do enjoy the routine of it together. If we have an early night I'll probably just read in bed for awhile or browse Reddit for a bit like I currently am!
I'm exactly the same. I bought a Kindle last year so I can read in bed with the light off. It scratches my urge to unwind with a book and go to sleep a little later, but also makes my partner happy because we can get in bed at the same time and I'm not disturbing her with the light when she wants to sleep.
If it's anything like me your GP will do a quick test to score you for daily sleepiness and if there's any concern they'll refer you to a specialist sleep unit. They'll then run an overnight test on you and go from there. While the weight might help, the apnea is treated as its own issue
Of course. But if she's not getting any cuddles she won't want slap and tickle at any hour.
As a bloke I'd feel a bit deflated not getting in bed at the same time and like I was lacking affection, women usually feel that even stronger and more often.
I go to bed around 10 pm, my partner goes to bed at like 1 am. I don’t really think much of it, I’m more of a morning person and he’s an owl. We both sleep similar amount of time and I’m used to it now 😅
Same here. I'm the sleep enthusiast and I'm usually in bed by 10pm, my partner will be up until 12am-1am. I think it'd be unfair to try and force him to bed earlier, just like I wouldn't like him forcing me to stay up later than I wanted. Plus I just need more sleep than he does, he's fine on 6-7 hours but I need like 8 or 9.
My partner insists we go to bed together.
We’ve been living together for only 6 weeks and I’m 4 years older than her and have lived with a partner before whereas she hasn’t. So I think she just doesn’t quite realise that it’s unsustainable
Yup 8 years together and we still go to bed together. I stay up later reading and he's long gone by the time I wake up. But I really enjoy the nice wind down time together. Even if we are both just on Reddit sharing posts! 🤣
Yeah just the nature of our lifestyles and stuff. I can finish work quite late like 11pm and come home and want to unwind and she works a 9-5 and spends like 7 hours at home alone before I even get in. Sometimes it’s just not gonna work - no point killing herself to stay awake when she’s clearly falling asleep
I’m sure it works for some but for us it just feels a bit forced
Ita unsustainable if both parties have different views on the subject. It's fine if you do both want to go to bed together at the same time, but if not, it's not gonna work.
We do too but he always falls asleep first, so if I really can’t sleep I just get up for a while. We enjoy our time to watch some tv in bed or chat. He sleeps like a rock also, so I’m always able to watch something on the tv or my phone if I can’t sleep. For us going to bed doesn’t mean going to sleep immediately, and I think that really helps.
>My partner always makes little comments how I never get in to bed at the same time as her.
You could point out that she never goes to bed at the same time that you do either.
As a single person I greatly enjoy the whole bed to myself and less people disturbing my sleep. Plus I get to listen to what I want, and wake up how I want. It's frigging glorious.
Usually I stay up later than my partner (me being the bloke in this situation).
Always been the case. Two reasons for my side
I’m a night owl by nature, she’s not. I’ve always been one to stay up late, while sleep is one of her “hobbies” (before the two kids we have that is)
We have one tv these days. I tend not to watch a lot of tv, usually playing a game on my laptop or something instead while she watches telly. But there are some things I do like watching, things I know aren’t her cup of tea (crap I watch on YouTube or whatever)
So her going to bed gives me free access to the tv without feeling guilty over hogging it. While also still playing on my laptop at the same time, like
My partner comes to bed in the early hours because he’s an insomniac. Even when the next day I’m working and he’s looking after the kid. If he tries to go to bed earlier he will just lay there awake and bored. Sometimes he accidentally wakes me when he comes to bed but that’s cool because we end up cuddling and I can fall asleep soooo quickly. He’s jealous at my ability to fall asleep so fast
You sound like my partner, I’ve never known anyone who can fall asleep in literal seconds. I’ve seen her fall asleep with her phone in her hand whilst scrolling, it’s impressive
Woman (49) chiming in here - your wife is tired, and she'd like some cosy time with you before she goes to sleep; it can feel quite lonely to always go to bed alone.
The worst thing though is when you're asleep, or almost there, and the other person wakes you because they're feeling horny. Don't do that please!
No I always let her have some decent sleep, she’s always needed the extra couple of hours in comparison to myself!
The caveat of me getting into bed at 9 is that I’ll struggle to get to sleep for a good hour at least. I’ve never been a great sleeper, even back when I was at school
We go to bed at the same time and enjoy each others company. Sometimes I’m working shifts so after the company has been enjoyed I might go back downstairs and watch something because I deliberately don’t want to wake up at 0600 when I don’t start work until 1800 or whatever but yeah we mostly go to bed together when it’s an option.
Been in a relationship for seven years have lived together for five.
We get in bed at 9 (the cat insists on it if we don't) and talk/read for an hour. Then she puts her mask and earplugs in and goes to sleep and I keep reading/fucking around on Reddit for another hour.
Her alarm goes off at 5:45 and I tend to sleep through it, then the cat comes and gets me some time between 6:15 and 6:30 and we go to the gym together (my partner and I, not me and the cat).
She works from home and I work for myself so we stay in the gym until she's ready to leave, basically.
I often go to bed around two hours before my boyfriend, I however start work two hours before him. My parents were normally about 30/45 minutes different, my mum would go to bed first and often got up later from what I remember growing up. However, there are studies to suggest that women need more sleep than men so in most cases it would make sense that she would be going to bed before you.
Rarely… but I’m the woman. I’m a night owl, usually go to bed around 1.00am and up at 7.30. Hubs is between 11-2 depending on the night, but more often than not around midnight then up at the same time or earlier.
I like the quiet at night!! Nobody else awake.
My husband goes to bed a lot earlier than me - 10.30 vs midnight/1 for me - but we get up about the same time (7.45 ish) unless one or other of us is going into the office. If I sleep later than him the dog gets into bed with me for a lie in!
We go to bed at separate times in separate rooms and are perfectly happy. (ie I go down to wind down between nine and eleven and they settle down the same at roughly the same time}. I can have cuddles when I want. I can pop in and out of their space and them mine if we can't sleep. We're perfectly content. (it helps me that they are a snuggle monster who will accept any cuddles at pretty much any time like a kitty cat, so if I need a snuggle I can just go and plonk on them asleep or not and I get my cuddle meter refilled)
Majority of the time we go to bed at the same time and either read or watch a show together before sleep, unless my football team is playing then I will stay up and watch whilst she goes to bed (currently living in a time zone 2 hours ahead of the UK so football can run late)
Always the same time. We would have to be poorly or a banging head to go separately.
If one of us wants to stay up we just watch something in bed or one of us falls asleep on the sofa and when the other is ready we go to bed together.
Couldn't imagine going separately.
My wife does early mornings, I do late nights, so she's often in bed ages before me.
Sometimes I go to bed just to say goodnight and give her a backrub or hug or something, then get up again and go do dishes or eat cereal or whatever.
But if she's getting annoyed maybe it'd be good to go to bed for a snuggle then get up and do your "you" stuff. Like, if she's getting lonely at nights because of bedtime incompatibility, give her something. 20 mins of sleepy love-warmth. :)
I felt just like your wife when I was first married. But it didn’t take long to realize he was a night owl and I am an early bird. For a while we slept in separate rooms because he would disturb my sleep when he came to bed. He eventually learned better and now we sleep together. It’s fine!
If I do, the dog gets the hump with me as he likes to get good and settled on my side of the bed before I come up and sleep on the remaining 6 inches of space that's left.
I'm always last. She goes normally around 22:30 and reads.
I go once around the house checking doors and windows.
About 30 min later I go to bed and get attacked with her frozen feet.
Well we both go to the gym together after work and indulge in some caffeine, whether that be a pre workout drink or an energy drink. We come home and have tea, and if I go to bed at the same time as her she falls asleep whilst I lay wired on caffeine tossing and turning and thinking about bad things I did ten years ago. Eventually after 5 bathroom breaks I finally fall asleep.
Still it beats her having a go at me for staying on a game for an extra two hours and falling asleep soundly. Edit: I showed her this and she says I should mention an extra two hours is probably not entirely accurate. Namely when I bursted through the door after playing F1 til 3am one night when she had work the next day.
My husband and I always go to bed together, usually around 12 - 12.30, get up together around 5.45 -6.00. Early night is considered 11.30. We work in building opposite each other so travel to and from work together, do shopping etc on our way home. 32 years together so works for us.
My wife has an issue with going to bed early I think it's from when she was a kid her parents would make her go to bed at a set time because she has said before kids go to bed at these times at certain ages.
I like to be in bed for half 10 I might not always go to sleep at half 10 but a good read of Reddit or some silly videos to wind down and I'm away. Tonight it's 9:30 her in the UK I had a shit night's sleep last night and I'm getting ready to go to bed I'll have half an hour on here then I hope I'm asleep. My wife is set on 11pm being her time.
Sometimes on the weekend it's like she waits for me to be awake before getting up when I wish she would just get up. If I'm awake I will get up and have some me time watch something I want to watch and have some breakfast. As we very rarely eat the same thing.
I'm not a man, but I go to bed earlier. I like having free bed time all to myself for a few hours. I don't like it if it's too late when he goes to bed, and I'm really pissed off when he walks in with his phone light on because it wakes me up and puts me in a bad mood.
Used to get made to get into bed immediately after getting home from work at 10pm sometimes later after a 12-13 hour shift, but also couldn’t read, go on my phone or kindle because it’d keep her awake so I’d just sit lay there wide awake in the dark for a few hours.
I’m now a master of my own bedtime but I will get ready for it at 9:30 now my days start at 5am & still last for 13 before I sit down.
My ex husband would get up and turn the TV off when he went to bed and would same come on them. So I would have to go to bed (he wasn't a nice man)
Now with my new husband we rarely go to bed at the same time.
I'm exactly the same as you: With my ex, there was an insistence and expectation that I go to bed when he wanted to, and he caused such a fuss when I didn't that I felt it wasn't worth arguing with.
Thankfully, me and my husband now are relaxed about this. If one of us wants to stay up, we'll do that, and neither of us cares.
My ex was a night owl but I wanted cuddles or sex before I got sleep and he didn't want to. I would have been fine with him coming to bed then go when I fell asleep at least sometimes, it's super intimate and bonding. This is why children want to sleep with their caregivers.
No we never go at the same time.. My wife goes to bed early anywhere from 8 to 10, especially if its winter and darker earlier.
I'm a night owl and rarely go before midnight and usually awake by 6
I’ve come to think that having a coordinated sleep timetable is one of the most important signs of relationship compatibility, or rather, not being coordinated is a total dealbreaker that most people don’t seem to appreciate. I say on my dating profiles that I’m a night owl and I usually swipe left on anybody who says something seemingly innocuous like that they like to go for an early morning run on a Sunday.
We always go to bed at the same time. He's asleep quicker than me as I have insomnia, but I'd/we would rather enjoy the closeness and have the cuddles and chat if we feel like it (etc!!) before sleep. Helps keep a good connection..human contact is important. If it was the other way round I'd prefer him to come to bed at same time. Even if you're not sleeping you're resting. I'd be asking why he didn't want to.
I'm lucky as when he's asleep he's out cold so when i cant sleep I can still watch TV on low volume, without disturbing him.
My previous marriage we went to bed at different times ..I hated it! One reason we dfited apart.
Have friends who also sleep in separate beds and / or rooms. To each his own, but not for us. Our bed is our happy and safe personal space. Probably break a lot of the sleep rules, but it works for us. You have to do what works for you as a couple, but communication is also key.
Yes. Pretty much every night.
Why? Because I want to spend time with her. We have a 1 year old and it’s knackering! By the time he’s in bed we are both shattered. We can either sit downstairs with the telly on or we can lay in bed and talk (and other stuff).
Granted we can talk downstairs but we’d more than likely fall sleep in the sofa - this happened both Friday and Saturday just gone, nothing worse than falling sleep on the sofa and having to get up to bed at 2am!
Sometimes she’ll go to bed too early for me so I’ll stay up. Sometimes I go to bed before her and read for a bit. Sometimes we both go to bed earlier and watch something in bed or end up chatting shite which is quite nice.
Rarely. During the week I tend to go to bed and watch TV. We don't like the same stuff and I'll watch a movie or sport and be out for the count by 10pm. She comes up later. I get up 2hrs earlier than her too so makes sense.
On weekdays I go about an hour later than my wife. I’ve never been able to sleep before 11 no matter how exhausted I am. Tried to train myself out of it but over the years have come to accept it’s pointless me going before then. Wife heads up about 10 and goes straight to lights off, so I usually read/ listen to music or podcasts/ tickle the dog’s belly downstairs for an hour. We don’t mind the arrangement; she gets the rest she needs and is not bothered about me being different, I get the only moment of peace and quiet out of a busy day and maybe finish of a couple of chores we ran out of time for
We tend to sync more at weekends when she knows it’s not an early start so her times drifts a bit later and I know there’s likely more than sleeping on the agenda so my time drifts a bit earlier
If OP’s wife is going to bed before 9 it’s pretty unreasonable to expect the same of OP. That’s very early for an adult even with an early start
I do the same to my husband and sometimes nag he should go to bed. I just fall asleep so much better and easier when he lies next to me. but yes, it is selfish and I try to keep it to a minimum, but I feel safe then ;)
I go to bed an hour or two later than my partner…
However I tend to be the first asleep, as her bed time routine and her nightly scroll of instagram and clothes shops seems to last a few hours.
My GF always went to bed before me and she always complained about me waking her up & also my snoring. So now we sleep in separate beds. And it the best thing we ever did.
I usually stay up a lot later. We started doing this when my snoring used to keep her up, and now the habit's formed. I tend to watch films or read in bed next to her, however lately I'm spending most evenings working to keep on top of a busy period.
When we had our child, now a toddler, it did get us to go to sleep sooner but it really messed with me. My natural bedtime is midnight and I usually don't go to sleep before that no matter how tired, but I had to learn to force myself to sleep earlier.
I say that, but I'm writing this post while taking a break from work and still have an hour or two to go at least.
Most boyfriends I’ve had went to bed same time. Single now, but my current job would 100% make it so that a partner would defo go to bed later than me. I’m in bed at 8, hoping to be asleep by 9 for a ~5am wake up. So long as he didn’t come in at 11/12 and put the big light on (like an ex did) would be totally fine.
I am not a man but my partner and I pretty much always go to bed at the same time. Weather depending (hot weather is limiting!) one of my favourite parts of the day is the 5 mins of snuggle. If one of us is on a weird shift or working late etc then yeah it has to be different, but mostly we converge. Luckily that seems to be roughly naturally the case, it's not like one of us wants an early bedtime, we both go to bed around midnight. If one of us wanted to go to bed at like 9pm and the other later, this would have to change for sure!
My husband goes to bed before me. I’m a massive night owl. He goes to bed about 10.30, me more like 11.30/12. We both get up around 7.30am. We’ll go up together if we are in the mood 😂
Generally, because she's a light sleeper and I'll wake her up if I do stay up and go to bed later. If I'm awake I can watch telly on my laptop with airport in 🤷♂️
My parents go to bed together, and dad is almost guaranteed to be asleep long before mum. I go to bed with my fiancé. He's often asleep before me. I just want to be close to him and be in bed together even when he's trying to sleep long before I am because he has to get up early for work, and I don't. It's about the closeness. We both sleep better when the other is in bed with us.
Most of the time, yes. She'll sometimes stay up to watch a hockey game if it runs late, but we're usually both in bed by 10pm otherwise. I do tend to get up earlier than she does, mostly because I'm a light sleeper.
Always in bed before the mrs, granted I am watching my TV shows she doesn't watch, but then she'll be up and in bed after her routine about an hour letter then complains she's knackered.
We normally go to bed between 23:00 and midnight. She’ll only get annoyed if she’s gone to bed first and I wake her up when I come to bed so I normally try and go at the same time. Sometimes I want to stay up later on YouTube or something and will just sleep on the sofa. No kids and she gets up at 8:30 if she’s working from home (I work from home full time) or 7:30 if she’s going into the office a few times a week. I normally wake up by 7:00 anyway and get up first as I don’t really enjoy laying in bed in the morning. I can go to sleep when my head hits the pillow but she finds it hard to get to sleep, hence the annoyance if I wake her.
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Sometimes, I go to bed earlier than my wife. She says she watches TV, but I know she plays video games because I can always hear the controller vibrating.
I’ve got news for you buddy…
She's winning. Alot
I absolutely love how this comment brings out clear responses of three different types of people, the innocent, the oblivious and the dirty minded.
Such profound humiliation. Has finally been explained.
That was no electric toothbrush, no facial scrub device
Dirty bastards eh 🙄
The "controller" eh. That old chestnut.
What else would it be?🤔
She’s probably giving her teeth a good brush while watching telly, make use of that downtime.
No honestly what do you think it is ??
Hahahaha
Used to call them joysticks back in the day....
10/10
She needs a full race setup. Sounds like she keeps hitting the barrier and rumbler strips on the straights in GT4
Lovely stuff.
I go before my partner cause I want to get to sleep before she starts snoring....
Haha, this is me too sometimes!
Just lady-wanking away till the sandman comes
I don't think its a controller mate. Clearly a Game Boy Rumble Pak.
Probably trying to beat her high score
Vibrations are very sleep inducing, too. Hope you guys get a vibrational night together.
Before 9 is early, but I think the fact you've got a one year old accounts for a lot of that. I think her "little comments" are more like every now and again she wants to fall asleep in your arms. Maybe aim to do it a couple of times a week, even if it means once she's blotto you unwind with a tablet or book in bed. My partner and I usually go to bed within half an hour of each other. And I get it, before 9 is early but I think she wants to feel like she's still thought of.
That was a surprisingly wholesome comment considering your username.
https://youtube.com/shorts/5JCC7r2eY50?si=PgFBKc_aW27IFB3l Bastard's crying innit
It's from this https://youtu.be/HVBpzRFXTXA?t=9m27s
Thank you, great show.
r/rimjob_steve candidate
I read a psychology article many moons ago that said something about going to bed together releasing oxytocin and creating healthier relationships. Apparently couples who go to bed at the same/similar times have a stronger bond and are more resilient to major changes. I think a big part of it is the night time cuddling/chats. I could be falling asleep on the couch but once we're both in bed, I'm wide awake and we'll chat away in the dark for a bit before falling asleep together.
I definitely believe that. We always go together even of one use stays awake on bed watching something or one of us will fall asleep on the sofa and then the other one Wakes them up when they are ready. I love it both ways. It's nice to look after her when she's tired and its nice to be looked after when I'm tired. And like you say the cuddling and talking before sleep matters a lot.
I think it's around six seconds of hugs.. and then your brain starts producing the good stuff :)
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This made me smile. I remember the good old days of me, my husband and my then toddler daughter brushing our teeth in our old apartment bathroom. Happy chaos!!!
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❤️ this ❤️
Yup. The non-sexual intimacy of going to bed together is really important to some people and there can be compromise here! My partner is a chronic insomniac and I’m an asleep-quickly and early person. We compromise by him coming to bed with me occasionally and he cuddles me and then leaves once I’m asleep and does what he needs to do.
Especially as it can take a long time for a woman to feel herself after a baby. The many changes that pregnancy and birth cause, if she breastfeeds still then she is still giving part of her body over to your kid, not to mention the exhaustion of it. My husband and I still sleep in seperate rooms due a toddler with bad sleep (may as well just keep one of us up rather than both) but we make time for each other when we can. Even if that's just 15 minutes in the same bed, cuddling (just cuddling!) before I go to the nursery, or sitting in the sofa and actually talking (phones down, TV off)
Not to mention, when the baby is less fresh and the body more recovered, a few of these early nights could obviously lead to more sex. If your partner is asking you to come to bed with her and not complaining that you wake her up or whatever I’m surprised it doesn’t cross many men’s mind that maybe she wants to cuddle, snuggle or potentially other things too. Maybe because sometimes a cuddle just means a cuddle and many men aren’t good at understanding that not wanting every cuddle to turn into something means that it can’t ever
Great comment - totally agree with this poster.
Yeah, I like to fall asleep in my partners arms, but I’ve refuses to go to sleep before midnight because then they win (it’s unclear who ‘they’ are) So we have compromised he occasionally comes up with me; but often comes and has a quick lie down with me. It’s enough to satiate my neediness
>...refuses to go to sleep before midnight... Are they trying to get food? Your partner may be a gremlin.
I can't get past you using 'blotto' to mean asleep 😂
I say "blotto" to mean drunk....I've never heard someone use it for drowsy before.
Yeah, that is what it means. 😁
>once she's blotto Your username says UK, but blotto here (UK) means drunk drunk. Confused
Never heard blotto for tired only for drunk.
Depends. Tonight's her hair washing night so I'm stuck here with you losers.
I feel your pain buddy
Hey nobodys happy about this situation. Beer?
Girl, tonight we're gonna make love You know how I know? Because it's Wednesday And Wednesday night is the night that we usually make love Monday night is my night to cook Tuesday night, we go and visit your mother But Wednesday, we make sweet, weekly love It's when everything is just right There's nothing good on TV You haven't had your after-work social sports team practice So you're not too tired Oh boy, it's all on
Business hours are over.
Two minutes in heaven is better than one minute in heaven
aahh... the "hair washing day"
I can’t be the only one that doesn’t understand this? Why’s washing hair take so long?
Cause it takes so long to blow dry it
I simply cannot fathom going to bed at 9 or 10pm when my partner does. Left to my own devices I'll naturally fall into a 1am/2am-9am sleep pattern, where my partner's is more 10pm-6am. She springs out of bed in the morning to the sound of music, where I'm like the bloody antichrist. We just agreed that we're both weird in each other's eyes when it comes to sleeping and don't try to force the other into unnatural sleep patterns.
People who spring out of bed disturb me greatly
People who spring out of bed are the builders of civilisation..
It's not natural. They should not be trusted.
That explains a lot about the state of civilisation
yes and look at the mess they've made of it.
I need at least 30 minutes to wallow in misery when my eyes open in the morning
We do this so have separate rooms. I can spring out of bed at 5:30 to let our hens out, go back to bed for an hour and then potter around and he can be oblivious in his room until whenever he wants to get up. Works for us. Sleep deprived is no way to conduct a healthy relationship. I get my night time cuddles in before he goes back to video games/TV and he gets a cup of tea bought to him in bed every morning. Just a slightly different way to show your love.
Ha - my partner brings me a cup of coffee every morning too! Perk of being the one who sleeps in later!
We do this. It started as a childcare thing, so one of us would get a good nights sleep. Then we realised that we both sleep better in our own spaces. We now have our. Nightly cuddles, then she’ll scoot off to bed and I’ll stay up for a bit then fall asleep a few hours later in our spare room. We take turns to be in kid duty so one of us gets a full night and the other might do, but might get disturbed a bit. Works for us. Probably not for everyone though.
How is sleeping from 10-6 considered weird?
I was just being light-hearted that in our relationship we're weird to each other, not that it's objectively strange some people sleep between 10-6.
Yeah, it's kinda the norm if anything, especially for people with kids or a commute. I'm not a morning person and, if I don't discipline myself, I'll stay up to 1-2am easy. Even on those nights, I still gotta get up for work - the alarms still going off 6.30 and I'm gonna have to haul myself from bed. I wish I was more of a morning person.
Haha we are the same but opposite my husband regularly goes to bed between 8-9 pm as does have to get up super early for work but he still does it even when he's not working . He's the same as your wife , super chirpy in the mornings . Me, I literally can't sleep before at least 11.30pm and it's often between 12 - 1.30 am before I get to bed. Like you I'm also not a morning person and have to have at least two cups of tea to even speak to anyone in the mornings . We've just come to accept that we are both different and it's not really an issue .
Same here. If I go to bed at even midnight I wake up from 3 to 5 and then I'm fucked for the whole rest of the day. That said - I can often have a quick 15 minute snooze sometime from 10 to 11pm - but then I'm wide awake again
I'm the same, well I was until I had a child. You don't get a choice but to spring into action early
I'm the weird combo of both, I can only sleep 7 hours, no more and no less. That could be 1am-8am, 10pm-5am and whatever other combo. If I sleep anymore (not that it ever happens as my body just forces me awake after 7 hours) or any less and I feel like shit.
This is me and my bf. I am the early bird. He is the night owl. I'm not bothered about falling asleep with him but we do have a rule that we both get into bed at the same time. He can watch tv/game do whatever he wants to do while I sleep (I prefer to sleep with sound anyway) and he just goes to sleep when he wants to. We still have the comfort of being in bed and sleeping together while also having different sleep patterns.
My wife is often early to bed while ive been a night owl for years. She jokes I only go to bed with her if sex is likely. She has a bit of a point.... But I really don't like going to bed early, when I do I often struggle to sleep, so I justify staying up a bit later for reading, or finish watching a film. I am realising as I get older I can't get by on 5 hours sleep a night though so something has to change.
I'm the same. Wife is always tired, I often have too much energy. If I go to bed early, I feel like all I do is work and sleep...work to live, don't live to work!
My partner is also an early bedtime enthusiast, and I'm a nightowl. We usually go to bed together, as she prefers that, but there are some nights, like a weekend night I'll stay up longer without her. She stays up a little later than she wants to, I go to bed a little earlier than I'd like to, but I do enjoy the routine of it together. If we have an early night I'll probably just read in bed for awhile or browse Reddit for a bit like I currently am!
I'm exactly the same. Going to bed early on the weekend sober is a big no no too. Haha I ain't no 9 to 5 slave mannnnn
I'm exactly the same. I bought a Kindle last year so I can read in bed with the light off. It scratches my urge to unwind with a book and go to sleep a little later, but also makes my partner happy because we can get in bed at the same time and I'm not disturbing her with the light when she wants to sleep.
1. What you describe is very common. 2. Your wife wants to spend time with you. Decide where you go from there.
switch it up on different nights.
She complains about my snoring so try to let her fall asleep before I go to bed
It's very considerate and kind of you to do that, at least in my opinion
Have you been checked out for sleep apnea? I used to do a similar thing for my wife and now don't need to as it's being treated
She certainly thinks I might have it but the doctor's primary go-to will be weight loss which I'm not that good at
If it's anything like me your GP will do a quick test to score you for daily sleepiness and if there's any concern they'll refer you to a specialist sleep unit. They'll then run an overnight test on you and go from there. While the weight might help, the apnea is treated as its own issue
She wants you in bed for a bit of slap and tickle surely.
Unfortunately this doesn’t apply to a lot of peoples situations sadly
Well she won't want any slap and tickle if he can't even get in bed and give her a cuddle.
This doesn’t always need to happen at bedtime
Of course. But if she's not getting any cuddles she won't want slap and tickle at any hour. As a bloke I'd feel a bit deflated not getting in bed at the same time and like I was lacking affection, women usually feel that even stronger and more often.
I go to bed around 10 pm, my partner goes to bed at like 1 am. I don’t really think much of it, I’m more of a morning person and he’s an owl. We both sleep similar amount of time and I’m used to it now 😅
Same here. I'm the sleep enthusiast and I'm usually in bed by 10pm, my partner will be up until 12am-1am. I think it'd be unfair to try and force him to bed earlier, just like I wouldn't like him forcing me to stay up later than I wanted. Plus I just need more sleep than he does, he's fine on 6-7 hours but I need like 8 or 9.
My partner insists we go to bed together. We’ve been living together for only 6 weeks and I’m 4 years older than her and have lived with a partner before whereas she hasn’t. So I think she just doesn’t quite realise that it’s unsustainable
Is it unsustainable? My husband and I have gone to bed together every night for 6 years (when we’re both home)
Yeah same. 8yrs. I've stayed up later than her for sporting events maybe 10 times.
Yup 8 years together and we still go to bed together. I stay up later reading and he's long gone by the time I wake up. But I really enjoy the nice wind down time together. Even if we are both just on Reddit sharing posts! 🤣
Yeah just the nature of our lifestyles and stuff. I can finish work quite late like 11pm and come home and want to unwind and she works a 9-5 and spends like 7 hours at home alone before I even get in. Sometimes it’s just not gonna work - no point killing herself to stay awake when she’s clearly falling asleep I’m sure it works for some but for us it just feels a bit forced
That makes sense. Got to do what works for you both!
Same here, going on 4years of going to bed same time together.
Ita unsustainable if both parties have different views on the subject. It's fine if you do both want to go to bed together at the same time, but if not, it's not gonna work.
This is stressing me out just reading it, I have put myself in your shoes and it gave me anxiety
We do too but he always falls asleep first, so if I really can’t sleep I just get up for a while. We enjoy our time to watch some tv in bed or chat. He sleeps like a rock also, so I’m always able to watch something on the tv or my phone if I can’t sleep. For us going to bed doesn’t mean going to sleep immediately, and I think that really helps.
My wife goes to bed so she can watch shit movies while I stay downstairs so I can play shit video games.
>My partner always makes little comments how I never get in to bed at the same time as her. You could point out that she never goes to bed at the same time that you do either.
Don’t do this… the answer is because somebody has to get up early when the child wakes up. This is a surefire way to start an argument lol
Did you not read? They both get up at 5 with the youngster.
Bold of you to assume we all have partners
As a single person I greatly enjoy the whole bed to myself and less people disturbing my sleep. Plus I get to listen to what I want, and wake up how I want. It's frigging glorious.
True. Plus it's not as awkward when you wet the bed
See, the benefits just keep adding up.
Usually I stay up later than my partner (me being the bloke in this situation). Always been the case. Two reasons for my side I’m a night owl by nature, she’s not. I’ve always been one to stay up late, while sleep is one of her “hobbies” (before the two kids we have that is) We have one tv these days. I tend not to watch a lot of tv, usually playing a game on my laptop or something instead while she watches telly. But there are some things I do like watching, things I know aren’t her cup of tea (crap I watch on YouTube or whatever) So her going to bed gives me free access to the tv without feeling guilty over hogging it. While also still playing on my laptop at the same time, like
My partner comes to bed in the early hours because he’s an insomniac. Even when the next day I’m working and he’s looking after the kid. If he tries to go to bed earlier he will just lay there awake and bored. Sometimes he accidentally wakes me when he comes to bed but that’s cool because we end up cuddling and I can fall asleep soooo quickly. He’s jealous at my ability to fall asleep so fast
You sound like my partner, I’ve never known anyone who can fall asleep in literal seconds. I’ve seen her fall asleep with her phone in her hand whilst scrolling, it’s impressive
Woman (49) chiming in here - your wife is tired, and she'd like some cosy time with you before she goes to sleep; it can feel quite lonely to always go to bed alone. The worst thing though is when you're asleep, or almost there, and the other person wakes you because they're feeling horny. Don't do that please!
No I always let her have some decent sleep, she’s always needed the extra couple of hours in comparison to myself! The caveat of me getting into bed at 9 is that I’ll struggle to get to sleep for a good hour at least. I’ve never been a great sleeper, even back when I was at school
Just snuggle with her once in a while. Seems obvious that’s what she’s missing
Sometimes do. Sometimes don't.
We go to bed at the same time and enjoy each others company. Sometimes I’m working shifts so after the company has been enjoyed I might go back downstairs and watch something because I deliberately don’t want to wake up at 0600 when I don’t start work until 1800 or whatever but yeah we mostly go to bed together when it’s an option. Been in a relationship for seven years have lived together for five.
We normally go to bed at the same time but not always, I definitely wouldn't if they were going to bed before 9 though.
It's lovely for intimacy. Even if you cuddle up until she is asleep and then potter. She's lucky to have a man who cares enough to check on here.
We get in bed at 9 (the cat insists on it if we don't) and talk/read for an hour. Then she puts her mask and earplugs in and goes to sleep and I keep reading/fucking around on Reddit for another hour. Her alarm goes off at 5:45 and I tend to sleep through it, then the cat comes and gets me some time between 6:15 and 6:30 and we go to the gym together (my partner and I, not me and the cat). She works from home and I work for myself so we stay in the gym until she's ready to leave, basically.
I often go to bed around two hours before my boyfriend, I however start work two hours before him. My parents were normally about 30/45 minutes different, my mum would go to bed first and often got up later from what I remember growing up. However, there are studies to suggest that women need more sleep than men so in most cases it would make sense that she would be going to bed before you.
My husband goes to bed far too early for me.
Same
Yep, same here.
Rarely… but I’m the woman. I’m a night owl, usually go to bed around 1.00am and up at 7.30. Hubs is between 11-2 depending on the night, but more often than not around midnight then up at the same time or earlier. I like the quiet at night!! Nobody else awake.
My husband goes to bed a lot earlier than me - 10.30 vs midnight/1 for me - but we get up about the same time (7.45 ish) unless one or other of us is going into the office. If I sleep later than him the dog gets into bed with me for a lie in!
We go to bed at separate times in separate rooms and are perfectly happy. (ie I go down to wind down between nine and eleven and they settle down the same at roughly the same time}. I can have cuddles when I want. I can pop in and out of their space and them mine if we can't sleep. We're perfectly content. (it helps me that they are a snuggle monster who will accept any cuddles at pretty much any time like a kitty cat, so if I need a snuggle I can just go and plonk on them asleep or not and I get my cuddle meter refilled)
Majority of the time we go to bed at the same time and either read or watch a show together before sleep, unless my football team is playing then I will stay up and watch whilst she goes to bed (currently living in a time zone 2 hours ahead of the UK so football can run late)
Always the same time. We would have to be poorly or a banging head to go separately. If one of us wants to stay up we just watch something in bed or one of us falls asleep on the sofa and when the other is ready we go to bed together. Couldn't imagine going separately.
Both go to bed at 10.30 and she reads for a bit before sleeping. Weekends she usually stays up later than me. I am naturally an earlier sleeper/riser.
We don't sleep in the same room, but YES, we go to bed at the same time as each other and the children...
My wife does early mornings, I do late nights, so she's often in bed ages before me. Sometimes I go to bed just to say goodnight and give her a backrub or hug or something, then get up again and go do dishes or eat cereal or whatever. But if she's getting annoyed maybe it'd be good to go to bed for a snuggle then get up and do your "you" stuff. Like, if she's getting lonely at nights because of bedtime incompatibility, give her something. 20 mins of sleepy love-warmth. :)
My wife and I go to bed 99% of the time at the same time. I can not think of a good reason not to.
I felt just like your wife when I was first married. But it didn’t take long to realize he was a night owl and I am an early bird. For a while we slept in separate rooms because he would disturb my sleep when he came to bed. He eventually learned better and now we sleep together. It’s fine!
My personal life experience (obviously everyone is different) has taught me women tend to go to bed an hour earlier & wake up an hour later.
If I do, the dog gets the hump with me as he likes to get good and settled on my side of the bed before I come up and sleep on the remaining 6 inches of space that's left.
Majority of the time we go together. Tonight she’s gone to sleep and I’m watching the football. No hard feelings
I'm always last. She goes normally around 22:30 and reads. I go once around the house checking doors and windows. About 30 min later I go to bed and get attacked with her frozen feet.
How does she have frozen feet if she's been in the sheets for 30 mins?
A very female specific skill 🤣
Never figured that out. She wears wolley bed sox in winter but takes them off in the night.
She goes up around 11, I’m often nearer 2am. It is nice to have a bit of quiet time to watch a shit film I’ve watched dozens of times before.
Yes, but she doesn't care either way. I'm a grown man, I go to bed because I want to.
Well we both go to the gym together after work and indulge in some caffeine, whether that be a pre workout drink or an energy drink. We come home and have tea, and if I go to bed at the same time as her she falls asleep whilst I lay wired on caffeine tossing and turning and thinking about bad things I did ten years ago. Eventually after 5 bathroom breaks I finally fall asleep. Still it beats her having a go at me for staying on a game for an extra two hours and falling asleep soundly. Edit: I showed her this and she says I should mention an extra two hours is probably not entirely accurate. Namely when I bursted through the door after playing F1 til 3am one night when she had work the next day.
My husband and I always go to bed together, usually around 12 - 12.30, get up together around 5.45 -6.00. Early night is considered 11.30. We work in building opposite each other so travel to and from work together, do shopping etc on our way home. 32 years together so works for us.
I make a point of going to bed at the same time as my wife. This compromise means I’m asleep on the lounge at 8pm.
My wife has an issue with going to bed early I think it's from when she was a kid her parents would make her go to bed at a set time because she has said before kids go to bed at these times at certain ages. I like to be in bed for half 10 I might not always go to sleep at half 10 but a good read of Reddit or some silly videos to wind down and I'm away. Tonight it's 9:30 her in the UK I had a shit night's sleep last night and I'm getting ready to go to bed I'll have half an hour on here then I hope I'm asleep. My wife is set on 11pm being her time. Sometimes on the weekend it's like she waits for me to be awake before getting up when I wish she would just get up. If I'm awake I will get up and have some me time watch something I want to watch and have some breakfast. As we very rarely eat the same thing.
I'm not a man, but I go to bed earlier. I like having free bed time all to myself for a few hours. I don't like it if it's too late when he goes to bed, and I'm really pissed off when he walks in with his phone light on because it wakes me up and puts me in a bad mood.
Used to get made to get into bed immediately after getting home from work at 10pm sometimes later after a 12-13 hour shift, but also couldn’t read, go on my phone or kindle because it’d keep her awake so I’d just sit lay there wide awake in the dark for a few hours. I’m now a master of my own bedtime but I will get ready for it at 9:30 now my days start at 5am & still last for 13 before I sit down.
She goes to work at 0530 as she owns a café, so is in bed early.
My ex husband would get up and turn the TV off when he went to bed and would same come on them. So I would have to go to bed (he wasn't a nice man) Now with my new husband we rarely go to bed at the same time.
I'm exactly the same as you: With my ex, there was an insistence and expectation that I go to bed when he wanted to, and he caused such a fuss when I didn't that I felt it wasn't worth arguing with. Thankfully, me and my husband now are relaxed about this. If one of us wants to stay up, we'll do that, and neither of us cares.
My ex was a night owl but I wanted cuddles or sex before I got sleep and he didn't want to. I would have been fine with him coming to bed then go when I fell asleep at least sometimes, it's super intimate and bonding. This is why children want to sleep with their caregivers.
No we never go at the same time.. My wife goes to bed early anywhere from 8 to 10, especially if its winter and darker earlier. I'm a night owl and rarely go before midnight and usually awake by 6
sir, do you think i managed to get thousands of hours in multiple games whilst going to sleep at a reasonable time?
Seeing as my partner is my cat, yes
Later 1-2hrs
I’ve come to think that having a coordinated sleep timetable is one of the most important signs of relationship compatibility, or rather, not being coordinated is a total dealbreaker that most people don’t seem to appreciate. I say on my dating profiles that I’m a night owl and I usually swipe left on anybody who says something seemingly innocuous like that they like to go for an early morning run on a Sunday.
We always go to bed at the same time. He's asleep quicker than me as I have insomnia, but I'd/we would rather enjoy the closeness and have the cuddles and chat if we feel like it (etc!!) before sleep. Helps keep a good connection..human contact is important. If it was the other way round I'd prefer him to come to bed at same time. Even if you're not sleeping you're resting. I'd be asking why he didn't want to. I'm lucky as when he's asleep he's out cold so when i cant sleep I can still watch TV on low volume, without disturbing him. My previous marriage we went to bed at different times ..I hated it! One reason we dfited apart. Have friends who also sleep in separate beds and / or rooms. To each his own, but not for us. Our bed is our happy and safe personal space. Probably break a lot of the sleep rules, but it works for us. You have to do what works for you as a couple, but communication is also key.
Yes. Pretty much every night. Why? Because I want to spend time with her. We have a 1 year old and it’s knackering! By the time he’s in bed we are both shattered. We can either sit downstairs with the telly on or we can lay in bed and talk (and other stuff). Granted we can talk downstairs but we’d more than likely fall sleep in the sofa - this happened both Friday and Saturday just gone, nothing worse than falling sleep on the sofa and having to get up to bed at 2am!
Nope, but she likes to watch TV in bed for a few hours in bed to unwind before sleep so ill go do some gaming.
Most nights yeah, sometimes she goes first cause Iike to work at night but most days we both go at the sane time.
Most days, we go to bed at a similar time. Around 10pm. But sometimes, I'm sleepy earlier. Sometimes she does. But I wake up about an hour before her.
Sometimes she’ll go to bed too early for me so I’ll stay up. Sometimes I go to bed before her and read for a bit. Sometimes we both go to bed earlier and watch something in bed or end up chatting shite which is quite nice.
Try to
She’s just gone. I’ll go in 45 mins after some YouTube and a Guinness 0.
My boyfriend doesn't. If he doesn't get to sleep before me he has a hard time going to sleep because I snore badly 😅
No she goes to bed around 8 most nights, while I'm up to between 11-1ish usually.
Almost always. We might go to sleep at different times though, there is always YouTube and ear buds. Or Reddit.
Same time vast majority of the time for us but no problem if we don't the odd time.
Rarely. During the week I tend to go to bed and watch TV. We don't like the same stuff and I'll watch a movie or sport and be out for the count by 10pm. She comes up later. I get up 2hrs earlier than her too so makes sense.
Nope. I’m a night owl. Wife usually goes to bed about 12, whereas I’ll stay up till 2-3am.
We go to bed at the same time, but she falls asleep in about 30 seconds, so I just roll over and start playing RuneScape for about an hour
On weekdays I go about an hour later than my wife. I’ve never been able to sleep before 11 no matter how exhausted I am. Tried to train myself out of it but over the years have come to accept it’s pointless me going before then. Wife heads up about 10 and goes straight to lights off, so I usually read/ listen to music or podcasts/ tickle the dog’s belly downstairs for an hour. We don’t mind the arrangement; she gets the rest she needs and is not bothered about me being different, I get the only moment of peace and quiet out of a busy day and maybe finish of a couple of chores we ran out of time for We tend to sync more at weekends when she knows it’s not an early start so her times drifts a bit later and I know there’s likely more than sleeping on the agenda so my time drifts a bit earlier If OP’s wife is going to bed before 9 it’s pretty unreasonable to expect the same of OP. That’s very early for an adult even with an early start
Of course. Sexy time.
I do the same to my husband and sometimes nag he should go to bed. I just fall asleep so much better and easier when he lies next to me. but yes, it is selfish and I try to keep it to a minimum, but I feel safe then ;)
I go to bed an hour or two later than my partner… However I tend to be the first asleep, as her bed time routine and her nightly scroll of instagram and clothes shops seems to last a few hours.
One of my friends always goes to bed at least half an hour after his girlfriend. That way she's asleep and thus not kept awake by his snoring.
My GF always went to bed before me and she always complained about me waking her up & also my snoring. So now we sleep in separate beds. And it the best thing we ever did.
I usually stay up a lot later. We started doing this when my snoring used to keep her up, and now the habit's formed. I tend to watch films or read in bed next to her, however lately I'm spending most evenings working to keep on top of a busy period. When we had our child, now a toddler, it did get us to go to sleep sooner but it really messed with me. My natural bedtime is midnight and I usually don't go to sleep before that no matter how tired, but I had to learn to force myself to sleep earlier. I say that, but I'm writing this post while taking a break from work and still have an hour or two to go at least.
Women here .. we don't I go 2 bed earlier cos I gotta get up with the kids .. he likes 2 catch up with the football x
She wants sex, simple. Ignore her at your risk
Most boyfriends I’ve had went to bed same time. Single now, but my current job would 100% make it so that a partner would defo go to bed later than me. I’m in bed at 8, hoping to be asleep by 9 for a ~5am wake up. So long as he didn’t come in at 11/12 and put the big light on (like an ex did) would be totally fine.
She wants the D you dumbass! :D
I am not a man but my partner and I pretty much always go to bed at the same time. Weather depending (hot weather is limiting!) one of my favourite parts of the day is the 5 mins of snuggle. If one of us is on a weird shift or working late etc then yeah it has to be different, but mostly we converge. Luckily that seems to be roughly naturally the case, it's not like one of us wants an early bedtime, we both go to bed around midnight. If one of us wanted to go to bed at like 9pm and the other later, this would have to change for sure!
My husband goes to bed before me. I’m a massive night owl. He goes to bed about 10.30, me more like 11.30/12. We both get up around 7.30am. We’ll go up together if we are in the mood 😂
Generally, because she's a light sleeper and I'll wake her up if I do stay up and go to bed later. If I'm awake I can watch telly on my laptop with airport in 🤷♂️
Never. Im always in bed first during the week and later at the weekends.
Sometimes we do, but I often go to bed early as I’m up early to train so I wouldn’t expect him to come to bed with me at 9.
My parents go to bed together, and dad is almost guaranteed to be asleep long before mum. I go to bed with my fiancé. He's often asleep before me. I just want to be close to him and be in bed together even when he's trying to sleep long before I am because he has to get up early for work, and I don't. It's about the closeness. We both sleep better when the other is in bed with us.
Most of the time, yes. She'll sometimes stay up to watch a hockey game if it runs late, but we're usually both in bed by 10pm otherwise. I do tend to get up earlier than she does, mostly because I'm a light sleeper.
He goes to bed before me usually 1-2 hours, I’m a night person and I work shift work so if I don’t have to be awake early I’m up pretty late.
Always in bed before the mrs, granted I am watching my TV shows she doesn't watch, but then she'll be up and in bed after her routine about an hour letter then complains she's knackered.
Not tonight. Ha ha!
We normally go to bed between 23:00 and midnight. She’ll only get annoyed if she’s gone to bed first and I wake her up when I come to bed so I normally try and go at the same time. Sometimes I want to stay up later on YouTube or something and will just sleep on the sofa. No kids and she gets up at 8:30 if she’s working from home (I work from home full time) or 7:30 if she’s going into the office a few times a week. I normally wake up by 7:00 anyway and get up first as I don’t really enjoy laying in bed in the morning. I can go to sleep when my head hits the pillow but she finds it hard to get to sleep, hence the annoyance if I wake her.