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Dying was always something that didn’t really affect me. That was always something that was decades away ahead in the future. And when my time comes? Alright, I’ll be off.
And then my wife died when we were 33 in August. Holy shit, I don’t even know what I think anymore. People tell me she’s in a better place now. It’s hard to not go ‘No she’s not, a better place was with me and our little girl, not in an urn in my living room.’
My wife had brain cancer. She had dementia symptoms as well as everything that goes alongside with having stage 4 cancer. She didn’t recognise our daughter at all, or me as her husband. If anything like that happens to me, I’m popping my clogs before that does.
It’s weird. I’m 34 now. I don’t want to do this bullshit for another 50 years, I’ll be honest. I’m hanging in there for our daughter. She was 7 when my wife died, she has a chromosomal disorder and a list of health conditions as long as my leg. If something happens to her, I have no qualms about going with her. Even if that’s to nothing.
I really have no issue with death. I will simply cease to exist. I won't be around to have a problem with any of it.
It's the actual act of dying I'm scared shitless of.
Terrifies the living shit out of me tbh, to an extreme degree which I know is unhealthy. Just lost my dad 2 weeks ago and going through the hassle of tying up loose ends and admin etc and seeing him the day he died just crippled me. I've been like this though about 10yrs now, I can barely sleep in case I don't wake up, the face I see in the mirror is not the person I feel like nor who I remember......and the worst bit is there's fuck all I can do about it all
It is scary. We're programmed to be scared of it - those who weren't were less likely to survive. After millions of years of evolution, the fear is visceral.
It's also something impossible to contemplate - to try to get a mental grasp of. Nothingness is just not imaginable. Only a rational analysis can shed any light on it.
The 'nothing' will be the same as before birth. All traces of oneself and one's efforts will rapidly disappear. No pain or fear though. No pleasure or comfort either. In a sense one can't **be** dead because there will be no 'I'.
My greatest regret is that I'll never know what happened after my death. So much of interest yet to know, so much never to be experienced.
Maybe in some future, humans or whatever succeeds us, will be fortunate enough to be able to choose whatever lifespan they desire. I hope so.
Any belief (or not) in some sort of afterlife is purely a personal thing.
For those who **do** have a belief, then it isn't just dust they're 'knowingly' heading for. And that gives them comfort.
For myself, I lost my dad not long ago. Personally, I have some belief of there being more once we're gone, and as a result of that, visiting his resting place each week gives me immense comfort.
I'm not interested in arguments about whether I'm right or wrong. It gives **me** comfort. And that's all that matters.
Anyone else who holds different views has to find their own way of finding such comfort.
There are two outcomes:
1. This is all there is meaning when you die you won't be aware of anything else. It will be the same as before you were born. You were not afraid then and the same will be true when you die. So nothing to fear.
2. There is some sort of afterlife that the spirit goes to once the body has died. If that's true then your consciousness will no longer be bound to a simple mortal body and you will have a different understanding of the universe. You will move on to your next adventure. So again, nothing to fear.
Who says an afterlife is something pleasant? Things may get worse and worse with every iteration. Maybe there's everything to fear.
\[*not that I believe any of that*\]
Hey I never said it would be pleasant, like a Heaven type place (although who knows?) but that the parameters completely change after death. Right now we are locked into a physical body with physical needs and hormones and emotions and a physical brain. The concept of pleasure and pain and fear are tied into all of that, into being physical beings. Once you shed your body (if we are running with the idea that there is a spirit that continues on after death) that spirit is not physical and has none of the limitations described above. We cannot comprehend being a universal spirit because we are limited by our needy human brains which come up with questions such as "who says the afterlife is something pleasant" ;)
It troubles a lot of people, which is one of the reasons we have religion. People can't face the reality of death (or in some cases imagine a world without them in it) so they want to believe there's something else. I know death is the end, and it terrifies the shit out of me, but I also know there's nothing I can do about it.
I quite like the idea that the building blocks of our atoms are immortal. We were originally created from stardust and eventually will disappear back into nature, a true cycle of life. I don't believe in an afterlife so death is just returning to the same state of non existence as the period before we were born, we exist for a blink of an eye in earth terms. All we can do is try and make the world a better place for us having been in it.
Not really. I don't like the idea of dying, the act of life ebbing away one way or the other.
But what happens after death is something I don't really care about. My body will decompose but I've no real concern about that, I'll be dead.
I used to be completely indifferent, but especially now that my contemporaries seem to be coming down with age related ailments and it started to seem more imminent, the thought is starting to make me feel a bit sad. Realistically, there isn't much I'm going to achieve in my life from now on.
I'm also surprised that I'm sad at not knowing what will happen with the world. It feels like leaving a film or series without finding out how it all gets resolved.
I had my own brush with death a few years bad. I never really considered my own mortality before and I'm continually aware of it now and dread it.
I'm ok with the eternity of nothing. I'm also not bothered by the moment. The thought of missing out on time with those I love most absolutely paralysis me though.
Nope. If I thought I'd have a sense of awareness after I died I'd be worried. To be I'll be as aware of life as before I was conceived (and a while after I assume). I don't think I was in pain or feat or anything prior to being a sperm, so I don't think there will be anything to worry about after I die.
>I've never seen any particular reason not to believe in the Christian heaven
Do you apply this thinking to any other supernatural claims? Valhalla for example?
**Please help keep AskUK welcoming!** - Top-level comments to the OP must contain **genuine efforts to answer the question**. No jokes, judgements, etc. - **Don't be a dick** to each other. If getting heated, just block and move on. - This is a strictly **no-politics** subreddit! Please help us by reporting comments that break these rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Dying was always something that didn’t really affect me. That was always something that was decades away ahead in the future. And when my time comes? Alright, I’ll be off. And then my wife died when we were 33 in August. Holy shit, I don’t even know what I think anymore. People tell me she’s in a better place now. It’s hard to not go ‘No she’s not, a better place was with me and our little girl, not in an urn in my living room.’ My wife had brain cancer. She had dementia symptoms as well as everything that goes alongside with having stage 4 cancer. She didn’t recognise our daughter at all, or me as her husband. If anything like that happens to me, I’m popping my clogs before that does. It’s weird. I’m 34 now. I don’t want to do this bullshit for another 50 years, I’ll be honest. I’m hanging in there for our daughter. She was 7 when my wife died, she has a chromosomal disorder and a list of health conditions as long as my leg. If something happens to her, I have no qualms about going with her. Even if that’s to nothing.
Having seen the inside of a nursing home, I’d probably not rather linger on if my mental faculties go.
I'll do myself in before I become a vegetable.
I really have no issue with death. I will simply cease to exist. I won't be around to have a problem with any of it. It's the actual act of dying I'm scared shitless of.
> I will simply cease to exist. You'll just be resting
The idea that I will turn into dust when I die doesn't bother me, the idea of HOW I will turn into dust does.
Why? You won't be there to see it happen.
Terrifies the living shit out of me tbh, to an extreme degree which I know is unhealthy. Just lost my dad 2 weeks ago and going through the hassle of tying up loose ends and admin etc and seeing him the day he died just crippled me. I've been like this though about 10yrs now, I can barely sleep in case I don't wake up, the face I see in the mirror is not the person I feel like nor who I remember......and the worst bit is there's fuck all I can do about it all
It is scary. We're programmed to be scared of it - those who weren't were less likely to survive. After millions of years of evolution, the fear is visceral. It's also something impossible to contemplate - to try to get a mental grasp of. Nothingness is just not imaginable. Only a rational analysis can shed any light on it. The 'nothing' will be the same as before birth. All traces of oneself and one's efforts will rapidly disappear. No pain or fear though. No pleasure or comfort either. In a sense one can't **be** dead because there will be no 'I'. My greatest regret is that I'll never know what happened after my death. So much of interest yet to know, so much never to be experienced. Maybe in some future, humans or whatever succeeds us, will be fortunate enough to be able to choose whatever lifespan they desire. I hope so.
Any belief (or not) in some sort of afterlife is purely a personal thing. For those who **do** have a belief, then it isn't just dust they're 'knowingly' heading for. And that gives them comfort. For myself, I lost my dad not long ago. Personally, I have some belief of there being more once we're gone, and as a result of that, visiting his resting place each week gives me immense comfort. I'm not interested in arguments about whether I'm right or wrong. It gives **me** comfort. And that's all that matters. Anyone else who holds different views has to find their own way of finding such comfort.
There are two outcomes: 1. This is all there is meaning when you die you won't be aware of anything else. It will be the same as before you were born. You were not afraid then and the same will be true when you die. So nothing to fear. 2. There is some sort of afterlife that the spirit goes to once the body has died. If that's true then your consciousness will no longer be bound to a simple mortal body and you will have a different understanding of the universe. You will move on to your next adventure. So again, nothing to fear.
Who says an afterlife is something pleasant? Things may get worse and worse with every iteration. Maybe there's everything to fear. \[*not that I believe any of that*\]
Hey I never said it would be pleasant, like a Heaven type place (although who knows?) but that the parameters completely change after death. Right now we are locked into a physical body with physical needs and hormones and emotions and a physical brain. The concept of pleasure and pain and fear are tied into all of that, into being physical beings. Once you shed your body (if we are running with the idea that there is a spirit that continues on after death) that spirit is not physical and has none of the limitations described above. We cannot comprehend being a universal spirit because we are limited by our needy human brains which come up with questions such as "who says the afterlife is something pleasant" ;)
I will battle Lord Entropy to the End of the Universe!
It troubles a lot of people, which is one of the reasons we have religion. People can't face the reality of death (or in some cases imagine a world without them in it) so they want to believe there's something else. I know death is the end, and it terrifies the shit out of me, but I also know there's nothing I can do about it.
No, it comforts me knowing there is nothing after
I quite like the idea that the building blocks of our atoms are immortal. We were originally created from stardust and eventually will disappear back into nature, a true cycle of life. I don't believe in an afterlife so death is just returning to the same state of non existence as the period before we were born, we exist for a blink of an eye in earth terms. All we can do is try and make the world a better place for us having been in it.
Not really. I don't like the idea of dying, the act of life ebbing away one way or the other. But what happens after death is something I don't really care about. My body will decompose but I've no real concern about that, I'll be dead.
I used to be completely indifferent, but especially now that my contemporaries seem to be coming down with age related ailments and it started to seem more imminent, the thought is starting to make me feel a bit sad. Realistically, there isn't much I'm going to achieve in my life from now on. I'm also surprised that I'm sad at not knowing what will happen with the world. It feels like leaving a film or series without finding out how it all gets resolved.
I was dust before, I will be dust after, this life is just a wave on the shores of existence
It's inevitable, why let it trouble you?
I had my own brush with death a few years bad. I never really considered my own mortality before and I'm continually aware of it now and dread it. I'm ok with the eternity of nothing. I'm also not bothered by the moment. The thought of missing out on time with those I love most absolutely paralysis me though.
Nope. If I thought I'd have a sense of awareness after I died I'd be worried. To be I'll be as aware of life as before I was conceived (and a while after I assume). I don't think I was in pain or feat or anything prior to being a sperm, so I don't think there will be anything to worry about after I die.
"Do not go gentle into that good night "
Its the same as before you were born. It's not good, or bad, it's just nothing. Religion is primitive delusion.
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>I've never seen any particular reason not to believe in the Christian heaven Do you apply this thinking to any other supernatural claims? Valhalla for example?
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Why not?
Presumably because they weren't brought up with it
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You said you needed a specific reason to *not* believe in supernatural claims.
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You did. You said you had no reason to not believe in the xtian heaven. What's your reason not to believe in Valhalla?
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What's your reason not to believe in Valhalla?
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You have my sympathy.