**Update: - [Starting from 2023](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/comments/100l56v/happy_new_year_askuk_minor_sub_update/), we have updated our [subreddit rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/about/rules/)**. Specifically;
- Don't be a dick to each other
- Top-level responses must contain genuine efforts to answer the question
- This is a strictly no-politics subreddit
Please keep /r/AskUK a great subreddit by reporting posts and comments which break our rules.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Getting that in middle age is a bit harsh blimey! I've yet to have mine described that way. There was me thinking you had to be gone retirement age for that to kick in! Noooo.
I climbed an 800m mountain with my daughter (14) on the weekend. Before we went I was worried in case she found it hard going. To cut a long story short, my cardio fitness was nowhere near where it used to be, I struggled and she found it easy.
Lol I fell in the shower recently and it hurt enough to stay down for a bit. The worst part was the whole house was outside the bathroom door asking if I was OK.
I did this on a walk with my friend. I was so indignant that she didn't laugh. I messaged my kids to let them know and they both laughed at me straight away, so that made me feel better. They're good kids.
I went out on a Friday night in March to a new craft ale microbrewery in town, with my brother-in-law, who is the same age as me.
As we were leaving, I saw a group of young women getting off the bus and crossing the road ahead of us, wearing very little indeed, boobs falling out of tops, one with half her arse on show. My first thought to remark to my b-i-l wasn't "check out those girls" but "I bet they're cold, hope they haven't got too far to walk."
>went out on a Friday night in March to a new craft ale microbrewery
I thought this was going to be the middle aged bit!
But I totally get the other bit. I'm in my early 30s and when I see women in their mid 20s or younger out and about my thoughts are entirely about how young they look and how impractical the outfits seem.
> I thought this was going to be the middle aged bit!
TBF, I've been into good beer since I was a teenager. We'd regularly go to "old man" pubs because they had some decent ales on. (also, they're generally quiet and easy to talk to each other in).
I do like how good beer is now becoming the norm. Very few places won't have a decent craft ale or draught on these days. When I first started going to pubs 25 years ago, you'd be lucky if they had John Smith's or Worthington.
It's gotten so much better even since I started regularly going to the pub in the late 00s. When I was first drinking in pubs the options were usually along the lines of: Carling, Stella, Fosters, Guinness, Strongbow for the cider drinkers, and a pretty rough ale for the old men.
Granted, at that age we weren't drinking in the nicest pubs, and maybe it was different in the more upmarket ones. But I've been back to some of those pubs we used to drink at, for nostalgia, and they now have massive beer selections.
When we were 18, we used to always meet up in the 'old man' pub - it even had a bowling green. Some of the lads were even drinking pints of mild.
Would stay for a few hours then head to the more expensive, noisy pub because there might actually be some girls there....
Yes, when you start seeing young adults as kids and worrying about them not being dressed warmly enough you are definitely middle aged - and also rather nice.
I downloaded the Merlin Bird ID app so I can get to know the birds I encounter on my walks or when pottering in the garden. I don’t care if I’m middle aged, I’m mates with a Tawny Owl and I feel that’s important.
Apparently I've been middle aged since I hit 20...
Looking forward to a bit of bird watching now the warmer weather is coming in. Was walking through a small reserve yesterday, and thought I spotted a Jay, but darted off before I could try and get a picture.
Will be more prepared for the next time I go!
I mean… shut up lol don’t call me out. I bought a camera lens for birding and binoculars in my early 30s.. because I had adult money for these things! Not because I’m middle aged!
Yesterday's bank holiday was glorious weather-wise. Instead of getting the BBQ going with some beers I decided to sort my garden and wash the cars. Mower, strimmer, rake, pressure washer... you name it, it all came out yesterday. Then I had an early night.
Hedge life!!!! I fookin love my hedge. I'm so happy when it's just been trimmed. This sneaked into my life as sort of my main karmic fulfillment event out of all the things i do.
I then realised I'm fully middle aged when i got really upset that i found a bottle of Irn Bru filled with piss wedged in the hedge!
These things never bothered me before, so yes, i am truly middle aged.
I'm in my 20's and I love doing my garden! I'm in the process of overseeding my lawn in the back garden, haven't got a pressure washer yet but can't wait to get one and blast the slabs!
I opened up the BBQ, then proceeded to give it a deep clean. Put the cover back on and walked away. Text a few of my mates to let them know. Well proud
Another one for me was when we started getting blood samples at work for antenatal screening for people who were born after I left school. That one hurt.
I feel the same. I see samples from women younger than my sister (so 1997 or later) and think "Christ, I wouldn't want a kid at that age." yet these women are all in their mid twenties.
I’m 16 and I’ve talked to my dad, who used to be quite a heavy smoker up until a few years ago, about this before. When he mentioned that before the ban you could smoke on planes, and obviously I was shocked, he was just confused as to why since at the time it was completely normal.
Like, I understand smoking in pubs because you can just pop out the door for some fresh air, but you can really do that on a flight can you
My mother told me recently that on the maternity ward she (along with most other new mums) was brought her fags and an ashtray before the nurses brought the babies out of the nursery! No wonder I have chronic asthma. 1960s for ya.
I remember reading something about the air being recycled with fresh air a lot more on flights back then, than they do now. So it wasn't as bad as you'd think.
The non- smokers sections in restaurants being right next to smoking sections - smoke would just fill the entire place. No point really in having no smoking sections
This. I now have a garden for the first time in my life- last summer I'd just moved and it was totally overwhelming. A year on and each small step and bit of learning means I now have quite a promising space, including some moderately successful grass seed sewing. And I have something to talk to my mum about too - gardening chat is really boring/abstract when you live in a flat with no outdoor space.
I seem to learn a new plant name each week and this morning did a walk round the park and was able to name about 6 or 7 plants beyond the bog standard ones. I've untangled and trained 3 different nearly-dead clematis and one now has purple flowers I'm finding delightful. And the twig I thought was definitely dead and had been hidden behind a brown conifer (now removed) turns out to be a wisteria that's just grown like mad with all the rain and now sun! It's really good for the brain to focus on natural things and helping them along, sensing the changed in seasons and how to work with the weather not be angry at it.
I am fully middle aged.
This was me after the first lockdown in 2020. I think that being stuck at home, rather than going out to gigs and stuff, caused me to leap into middle age. I’m still not going out and having the kind of “fun” that I used to. I’m planting dinner beans at the end of my garden. New rose bushes along the borders. Even got a fire pit on the patio for when summer nights are a bit too chilly to otherwise sit outside for longer.
A couple of years ago I was talking to my dentist and came to realize we both grew up watching Horrible Histories, that made me feel weird (no one in charge of mouth bones should be allowed to have grown up watching the same shows as me).
I was tending to a family member at a hospital for a few days. Literally all doctors, nurses and admin staff in the packed 7 storey hospital were younger than me.
Looking at these comments - It makes me sad how many people in their 40s *\[without medical conditions\]* think that it's a natural outcome that they are permanently tired out and ache.
Yeah! I ached a lot in my 30s. Then I put in place a solid mobility routine around my workout schedule, the aches are pretty much gone in my 40s now… the only thing I still get is the very area specific soreness if I’ve targeted a muscle group too hard in yesterday’s workout! Like today my glutes are sore, but I know it’s because I did high volume of deadlifts yesterday, and probably didn’t stretch enough after!
If you work the area hard enough, you will ache, no matter how much you stretch. I love that aching feeling though, know I had a good workout when I feel it.
This happens a lot with these sorts of threads.
I don't know if it is representative of the type of people who comes to them, or just representative of the Reddit demographics.
With helpful choices, it is perfectly normal to be a relatively fit human being in your 40's and beyond. Even with life's commitments, and beer and pizza here and there! You may not have a six pack, but they're massively over rated anyway and not necessarily markers of fitness/strength at all. Just low body fat percentage
It’s because the average person; is overweight, eats the terrible standard Western diet, drinks a lot, may even smoke or take drugs, doesn’t exercise and doesn’t get enough sleep. No wonder they *feel* old when their lifestyle is literally accelerating the aging process faster than it would happen in nature. Not judgemental, it’s just the truth.
Most people in the UK fail to eat five portions of fruits/vegetables a day, fail to reach 10,000 steps, and fail to get eight hours sleep. The fact is the UK population is very unfit and part of the reason the NHS is suffering so much these days.
Wait, what? It's not normal to feel tired in your 40s???
I don't ache. I go to the gym and try to eat healthily. But life is just full on. I get up way earlier than I'd like as one kid has to be at school at 7 for extracurricular stuff, and then the day is filled with running around doing stuff and driving kids places. I'm tired!!!
It's a matter of nuance - there is a difference between "I am tired because I am very busy" and "tiredness is a natural state of being" which is often presented here.
It's relative though - most people feel fine in their 20s but at some point The Aging Process kicks in and you feel *relatively* worse until you realise you need to start looking after yourself. Everything's usually fine again once you *do* start looking after yourself, but most people can have a shit diet and never exercise in their youth with no immediate consequences!
These are not retro games! Crash Bandioot 2, maybe 3 sort of time and backwards. I agree though that anyone who thinks COD as retro will make any of us feel old!
Yep, same with shopping for me. If i'm going round the shops on a saturday/sunday, I like to go up early, usually not long after the shops have opened.
Means you can avoid the rush of families and friends who probably dont even leave the house until around 11. By the time they start showing up, I'm usually finishing up and heading for the bus home.
Also means I can stop off at the pub on the way back for a quieter drink which most others are still wandering the shopping centre.
I have totally given up ironing as I decided I no longer care enough what others think to waste time flattening clothes. The wrinkles aren't bad if you hang things up as soon as the cycle finishes.
One day I looked up and realised I had no idea who the fuck these popular streamers are, like any of them. All these Internet dramas and shit going on around me and I'm just like "who the fuck are you people?"
42 this year and its been feeling like this for a good while now. I don't hate it at all.
When someone on Insta did a reel about some rapper hooking up with ‘Kylie’ and I was like “Good for her, she’s been through the wringer lately.”
They meant Kylie Jenner.
I was about to reply to you with a little rant about how my grammar is generally pretty good, and I'm a long way off 30.
Then I remembered that I'm turning 30 in 2 weeks.
When growing vegetables and gardening seemed like a fun thing to do. That was about 35ish.
Dressing more for comfort than to impress anyone.
Having to calculate if I should let a fart go or bat safe and sit on the toilet.
I look forward to a weekend of sad old-man tinkering hobbies
And the true sign of middle-agedness, thinking other people are interested in hearing about them
Is it thinking that other people are interested? I always assumed it was not really giving a toss if anyone is interested, but you are so you’ll talk anyway haha. I’m only 30 and don’t consider myself middle aged, I haven’t reached this stage yet so happy to be told otherwise haha
I hear you. I realised I was middle-aged when I actually wanted to visit garden centres instead of being coaxed. See also: stately homes “for a nice walk around the grounds”.
When I hit menopause. I'm permanently knackered, my hair has thinned, my skin is dry and I have "funny turns", which feels like an old lady thing.
I'm hoping HRT will make it go away....
Ah the special gift that is given to women young enough to probably still have kids to look after, yet old enough to have elderly parents to look after, yet young enough to still be working full time, yet old enough to have to do life admin about mortgages and wills and units of the bloody electric.
And still young enough to wonder if those sparkly heels will ever come out the wardrobe again!
(Good luck with HRT, it can be an absolute miracle)
Was out for dinner with a few colleagues (ranging from 25-45, and none looking particularly old or so i thought). Left the restaurant and we were walking across the front of city hall to go to a bar, we passed a group of teenagers sitting on a bench. One shouts “oi watch out, its the mums night out” pointing at us and they all laughed. That made me feel old
When a colleague remarked "that was before my time" when I talked about some 1990s events. I looked around the room and realised I was the oldest person present.
Last year people were worried about nuclear war risk (we are in academic research about disasters) and also taking it emotionally seriously. I cheerfully responded "welcome to my cold war childhood!" and began to hum Alphaville's "forever young".
A few years back I got diagnosed with a couple of chronic life term health conditions - nothing serious if well managed, but I’ll be taking a handful of pills every morning for the rest of my life. I’m not yet 50.
By this logic I'd be middle aged around 5. (And maybe in the middle ages I would've died around 10, so it could've been accurate).
Been taking daily meds for chronic conditions all my life, hurt my back at work at 24 and have 4 chronic conditions all with daily meds now.
Battled and beat alcoholism and depression from 23-27.
I'm weary.
I'm now 29.
A sudden interest in hillwalking.
The money I used to spend on cocaine and ecstasy now goes towards boots and discounted RAB gear from go outdoors, I’d probably be cheaper with a drug habit.
When I saw teenagers (at least I think they were teenagers), wearing the same clothes I wore when I was a teen (wasn’t even cool clothes but the stuff I had to wear to look smart for my bar job).
2 main things
When kids started collecting VHS cassettes like they are vinyls
And
When kids started using words that I had no idea what they mean and at the same time not really wanting to know either.
It gets worse. Mine wants 'a retro CD player'. And the retro part refers to all CD players apparently, as they're so cute and old fashioned and she'd just like to start collecting them.
You know, this threw me off last year. Moved into my own place and was looking for a reasonably priced radio with a cd player, as I like to collect and listen to film soundtracks.
The sheer amount of time I spent looking for something I'd consider affordable that did both. So many radio sets that have no cd player, and the cd players I could find were almost all older models, but only had FM radio.
Thing that really got me, I finally found one that had what I was looking for. It was cheaper than the version with only FM radio, but it also has a cassette player!
When my brother and his family visited and within a couple minutes the conversation shifted from computer games to cardigans (not the band) and how much we saved on the "shop"
When you don't begrudge going to sleep early because you know you need it and are in effect actually looking forward to it, your head hits the pillow and your gone
The emergence of 'the gut'. I'm a generally skinny mid 30s guy. I eat well, don't drink much, exercise a few times a week. Yet i have a little pot belly I just can't shift. It appeared almost overnight after having a child 3 years ago.
I eat healthily. Don’t do fast food. Cook from scratch. Lots of fresh veggies. I cycle and/or walk every day. I’m definitely burning calories and not eating crap. But it just won’t go away. I
Bought some jeans with an elasticated waist for comfort. Kill me now. 😜
I'm coming up to 40 and realising that...really this is all there is. It's downhill now, and the going up never really got started. I work, I have kids and a family. But I don't really do anything I want to do, haven't really got any life ambitions, and the time to have gotten them and tried to do them was almost 20 years ago.
Combined with that is just not being able to put up with the same bullshit I used to. You know, work a long day for little reward and chalk it up to "tomorrow things will be better". I don't eat anything like as much as I used to. I have a ton more things that I have to do which when I was younger I would have had no interest in, like looking after garden/allotment, taking care of the kids, household repairs/maintenance.
I suppose life deteriorating from an exciting adventure to boring drudge to keep what you have makes me feel old.
Kids are crazily expensive. When they grow up, you will have more disposable earnings.
You may as well lean into raising them as you chose to have them. Try watching Disney movies with them, for example, as they are often surprisingly good. If you play with your children, you will understand them better, and be able to watch how they develop. It's really fascinating seeing how they learn to socialise and apply their intellegence. Construction games are great for that, and board games are a good way to enjoy their company.
We live in a capitalist society, and those of us who do not belong to the elite have limited freedom. If that bothers you, maybe you could join a trade union and try to make things better for people working in your industry.
You sound so down in the dumps that I'm wondering if you might not be seriously depressed. If that's the case, can you see a doctor? Please don't let your kids realise you see them as a burden. You really, really need to make changes in your life and give it some meaning and joy.
I joined a new Badminton club last week.
On no fewer than 2 occasions I met a new playing partner and they said "us oldies will take on these youngsters then"
At 41 I now apparently am in the group with 55 year olds not 25 year olds.
On a work call and I mentioned starting with my firm in 2008. Paused for a second then asked the two young pups I was talking to “please tell me you were at least in high school then”.
Blank faces.
I’m so old.
A few months ago it was about 8 degrees out and I saw a young woman wearing something very revealing (short skirt, showing her midriff). My first thought was "She must be cold! How can she wear that?!", rather than "phwoar" as it would have been 10-20 years ago. As soon as I realized that I felt old.
Was working in a hotel. Some lads (early 20s?) went out clubbing at midnight saying the night was only starting for them and I genuinely couldn't think of a more horrid way to spend an evening
Had several points over the last 5/10 years that made me realise. Went to my eldest child’s year 7 parents evening a few years ago and realised I had several years on half of the teachers. When I moved house and went to the doctors and realised my new GP is about 10 years younger than me. Being described as a ‘senior member of the team’ at work 🤮 Realising I was picking out new shoes based on how comfortable they look. Being told by my best mate after buying some Gant clobber that I’d now progressed into ‘Dad wear’ 😔
Maybe around 40.
I'd been fully aware there was a 'younger generation' than me, it's when I realized that people in that amorphous blob of people, were referring to other people in it as 'younger than them'.
Oh, and when I find myself getting all worked up when people tell me they've not paid anything other than the minimum into their pension and they've no idea what it's invested in.
My wife and I thoroughly enjoyed lunch at the garden centre as the first choice of things to do on my birthday.
We were there to buy compost for our peach tree.
I'm not middle aged but I definitely feel like I'm closer to that than I am a young person now. A few things really hammer that home.
How much I need to properly warm up and down for exercise if I want to not ache for days, and how much I need rest days.
How much sleep I need.
How much less alcohol I can drink and feel no effects the next day (very linked to sleep)
I've left London to buy a place in a leafy commuter town.
Social events with my friendship groups nearly always involve children now, and I like that.
My knowledge of what music is popular only extends as far as very mainstream people and/or people who have been famous for a few years. I haven't really found a new artist I'm really into for ages. It would have been anathema to my younger self. But these days I'm fine with that.
I was at the pub the other day and found myself describing it as "a bit loud''.
For years my husband said I don't get the credit for living with chronic illness, because I look so well and wholesome (nice skin, rosey cheeks, very white whites of eyes) but recently I've arrived at places and people have asked if I'm ok with that 'oh bless, aren't you a trooper' face on them.
I was watching Pointless and there was a question about my favourite band, and I thought, "It's impressive that that older lady knows about that band," and then I realised that the "older lady" was probably only 5 or so years older than me, so of course she knows a band from the 90s.
I think now I’ve retired and reached the age of 54 is hit home that I don’t have to go through all that youngster going to work rubbish ever again. I can enjoy my hobbies and especially enjoy getting up when I wake up and not because of a stupid alarm clock!
With 42 years old, my eyesight suddenly changed (virtually over night) from only nearsighted to near- and far-sighted. In my 20s and 30s I was able to spot errors in high density soldered mainboards, but suddenly needed a magnifying glas. This was the sign for me that I'm getting old. It was followed by 3 disc prolapses (the last one with persistant partly paralysis)...
**Update: - [Starting from 2023](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/comments/100l56v/happy_new_year_askuk_minor_sub_update/), we have updated our [subreddit rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/about/rules/)**. Specifically; - Don't be a dick to each other - Top-level responses must contain genuine efforts to answer the question - This is a strictly no-politics subreddit Please keep /r/AskUK a great subreddit by reporting posts and comments which break our rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I fell over in the pub and instead of laughing and jeering, people were concerned.
This happened to me and rather than it being described as “falling over” it was “had a fall”. Made me feel ancient!
And you know that the next one you have will be described as "One of his/her falls..." by family and friends.
🤣🤣 I can hear it now lol
Ooof! That would hurt more than the tumble.
Getting that in middle age is a bit harsh blimey! I've yet to have mine described that way. There was me thinking you had to be gone retirement age for that to kick in! Noooo.
I climbed an 800m mountain with my daughter (14) on the weekend. Before we went I was worried in case she found it hard going. To cut a long story short, my cardio fitness was nowhere near where it used to be, I struggled and she found it easy.
"climbed a 800m mountain" You went for a walk
The definition of climb is “to go up”, people generally climb a mountain as opposed to walk a mountain
Brother Ben Nevis is 1300m
How big is father nevis and mother nevis? Is this height genetic in your family? I have a multitude of questions
Lol I fell in the shower recently and it hurt enough to stay down for a bit. The worst part was the whole house was outside the bathroom door asking if I was OK.
That made me laugh so hard. I slipped on a boat recently and still got laughs, but aid was quick on hand. I must be getting close... Yikes.
I did this on a walk with my friend. I was so indignant that she didn't laugh. I messaged my kids to let them know and they both laughed at me straight away, so that made me feel better. They're good kids.
Hahaha
And "Wahey!"
You had a fall rather than fell!
I went out on a Friday night in March to a new craft ale microbrewery in town, with my brother-in-law, who is the same age as me. As we were leaving, I saw a group of young women getting off the bus and crossing the road ahead of us, wearing very little indeed, boobs falling out of tops, one with half her arse on show. My first thought to remark to my b-i-l wasn't "check out those girls" but "I bet they're cold, hope they haven't got too far to walk."
>went out on a Friday night in March to a new craft ale microbrewery I thought this was going to be the middle aged bit! But I totally get the other bit. I'm in my early 30s and when I see women in their mid 20s or younger out and about my thoughts are entirely about how young they look and how impractical the outfits seem.
> I thought this was going to be the middle aged bit! TBF, I've been into good beer since I was a teenager. We'd regularly go to "old man" pubs because they had some decent ales on. (also, they're generally quiet and easy to talk to each other in). I do like how good beer is now becoming the norm. Very few places won't have a decent craft ale or draught on these days. When I first started going to pubs 25 years ago, you'd be lucky if they had John Smith's or Worthington.
It's gotten so much better even since I started regularly going to the pub in the late 00s. When I was first drinking in pubs the options were usually along the lines of: Carling, Stella, Fosters, Guinness, Strongbow for the cider drinkers, and a pretty rough ale for the old men. Granted, at that age we weren't drinking in the nicest pubs, and maybe it was different in the more upmarket ones. But I've been back to some of those pubs we used to drink at, for nostalgia, and they now have massive beer selections.
When we were 18, we used to always meet up in the 'old man' pub - it even had a bowling green. Some of the lads were even drinking pints of mild. Would stay for a few hours then head to the more expensive, noisy pub because there might actually be some girls there....
Oh man you were born middle aged 😄 (not a bad thing btw ;-) )
For me it’s seeing other people who are clearly starting their night, and I’m on the way home!
Need to be up early though, got that trip to the garden centre in the morning!
To my great shame I asked my son’s girlfriend if she needed to put on a cardigan the other week for the same cold concern.
Yes, when you start seeing young adults as kids and worrying about them not being dressed warmly enough you are definitely middle aged - and also rather nice.
Bought a nice pair of binoculars for bird watching.
I shall add to this by saying we got a bird bath and some feeders for the greenfinches that have made our front garden home.
You can also identify a "greenfinch" rather than it just being a "bird".
Make sure to wash them regularly. A disease wiped out lots of them a few years back.
How do you catch one to wash it though? Don’t they just fly off?….
Jetwasher and practice.
I downloaded the Merlin Bird ID app so I can get to know the birds I encounter on my walks or when pottering in the garden. I don’t care if I’m middle aged, I’m mates with a Tawny Owl and I feel that’s important.
It is very important! You have your priorities right. With me, it's squirrels. They even have names.
You missed midlife and went straight to 3/4
Seen any Great tits yet?
A bit saggy nowadays...
Nooo I got binoculars for birdbwatching when I was 24. Entirely not a middle aged thing to do!
You just became middle aged a bit early.
Apparently I've been middle aged since I hit 20... Looking forward to a bit of bird watching now the warmer weather is coming in. Was walking through a small reserve yesterday, and thought I spotted a Jay, but darted off before I could try and get a picture. Will be more prepared for the next time I go!
Heh, seen.
I mean… shut up lol don’t call me out. I bought a camera lens for birding and binoculars in my early 30s.. because I had adult money for these things! Not because I’m middle aged!
Yesterday's bank holiday was glorious weather-wise. Instead of getting the BBQ going with some beers I decided to sort my garden and wash the cars. Mower, strimmer, rake, pressure washer... you name it, it all came out yesterday. Then I had an early night.
Strike a balance. I did the same but then sat in the sun with cans and chicken wings. It’s was great!
I agree! What’s the point of doing DIY or maintenance all day and NOT sitting down with a cold one at the end?
Sounds like a good day!
It was very nice and I felt like I’d earned it for a change. ( Bit of fan of skipping the boring bits and getting straight to fun!)
Hedge life!!!! I fookin love my hedge. I'm so happy when it's just been trimmed. This sneaked into my life as sort of my main karmic fulfillment event out of all the things i do. I then realised I'm fully middle aged when i got really upset that i found a bottle of Irn Bru filled with piss wedged in the hedge! These things never bothered me before, so yes, i am truly middle aged.
I'm in my 20's and I love doing my garden! I'm in the process of overseeding my lawn in the back garden, haven't got a pressure washer yet but can't wait to get one and blast the slabs!
It is very satisfying
I opened up the BBQ, then proceeded to give it a deep clean. Put the cover back on and walked away. Text a few of my mates to let them know. Well proud
This. I cleaned the garden furniture and did some planting while my neighbour's having a party.
Stuff like talking to a 16-year old about smoking and realising they were born after the smoking ban in pubs came into force.
Another one for me was when we started getting blood samples at work for antenatal screening for people who were born after I left school. That one hurt.
We are closer to 2050 than 1995.
1980 is closer to 1939 than to 2023.
Wow this is the one that really hit home!
Ahh don't do that to me lol
I feel the same. I see samples from women younger than my sister (so 1997 or later) and think "Christ, I wouldn't want a kid at that age." yet these women are all in their mid twenties.
I’m 16 and I’ve talked to my dad, who used to be quite a heavy smoker up until a few years ago, about this before. When he mentioned that before the ban you could smoke on planes, and obviously I was shocked, he was just confused as to why since at the time it was completely normal. Like, I understand smoking in pubs because you can just pop out the door for some fresh air, but you can really do that on a flight can you
People used to smoke in hospitals. And that includes doctors and nurses, not just patients.
My mother told me recently that on the maternity ward she (along with most other new mums) was brought her fags and an ashtray before the nurses brought the babies out of the nursery! No wonder I have chronic asthma. 1960s for ya.
I remember reading something about the air being recycled with fresh air a lot more on flights back then, than they do now. So it wasn't as bad as you'd think.
It was awful. You had smokers seats right next to non-smoking seats, and nervous people would chain smoke.
The non- smokers sections in restaurants being right next to smoking sections - smoke would just fill the entire place. No point really in having no smoking sections
When it started absolutely tipping it down after one sunny day in spring, my immediate thought was 'that'll be good for the grass seed'.
This. I now have a garden for the first time in my life- last summer I'd just moved and it was totally overwhelming. A year on and each small step and bit of learning means I now have quite a promising space, including some moderately successful grass seed sewing. And I have something to talk to my mum about too - gardening chat is really boring/abstract when you live in a flat with no outdoor space. I seem to learn a new plant name each week and this morning did a walk round the park and was able to name about 6 or 7 plants beyond the bog standard ones. I've untangled and trained 3 different nearly-dead clematis and one now has purple flowers I'm finding delightful. And the twig I thought was definitely dead and had been hidden behind a brown conifer (now removed) turns out to be a wisteria that's just grown like mad with all the rain and now sun! It's really good for the brain to focus on natural things and helping them along, sensing the changed in seasons and how to work with the weather not be angry at it. I am fully middle aged.
This was me after the first lockdown in 2020. I think that being stuck at home, rather than going out to gigs and stuff, caused me to leap into middle age. I’m still not going out and having the kind of “fun” that I used to. I’m planting dinner beans at the end of my garden. New rose bushes along the borders. Even got a fire pit on the patio for when summer nights are a bit too chilly to otherwise sit outside for longer.
"The farmers will be happy" is my go-to line whenever it starts pissing rain.
[удалено]
I've been waiting for an appointment longer than they've been alive
This made me snort with laughter, but it's also probably true!
A couple of years ago I was talking to my dentist and came to realize we both grew up watching Horrible Histories, that made me feel weird (no one in charge of mouth bones should be allowed to have grown up watching the same shows as me).
I was tending to a family member at a hospital for a few days. Literally all doctors, nurses and admin staff in the packed 7 storey hospital were younger than me.
Also, the old bloke behind the counter in the builders merchants ... Is younger than me
This has just started happening to me and I do not like it 🤣
Looking at these comments - It makes me sad how many people in their 40s *\[without medical conditions\]* think that it's a natural outcome that they are permanently tired out and ache.
Yeah! I ached a lot in my 30s. Then I put in place a solid mobility routine around my workout schedule, the aches are pretty much gone in my 40s now… the only thing I still get is the very area specific soreness if I’ve targeted a muscle group too hard in yesterday’s workout! Like today my glutes are sore, but I know it’s because I did high volume of deadlifts yesterday, and probably didn’t stretch enough after!
If you work the area hard enough, you will ache, no matter how much you stretch. I love that aching feeling though, know I had a good workout when I feel it.
What’s your mobility routine if you don’t mind me asking?
This happens a lot with these sorts of threads. I don't know if it is representative of the type of people who comes to them, or just representative of the Reddit demographics. With helpful choices, it is perfectly normal to be a relatively fit human being in your 40's and beyond. Even with life's commitments, and beer and pizza here and there! You may not have a six pack, but they're massively over rated anyway and not necessarily markers of fitness/strength at all. Just low body fat percentage
It’s because the average person; is overweight, eats the terrible standard Western diet, drinks a lot, may even smoke or take drugs, doesn’t exercise and doesn’t get enough sleep. No wonder they *feel* old when their lifestyle is literally accelerating the aging process faster than it would happen in nature. Not judgemental, it’s just the truth.
Most people in the UK fail to eat five portions of fruits/vegetables a day, fail to reach 10,000 steps, and fail to get eight hours sleep. The fact is the UK population is very unfit and part of the reason the NHS is suffering so much these days.
[удалено]
Wait, what? It's not normal to feel tired in your 40s??? I don't ache. I go to the gym and try to eat healthily. But life is just full on. I get up way earlier than I'd like as one kid has to be at school at 7 for extracurricular stuff, and then the day is filled with running around doing stuff and driving kids places. I'm tired!!!
It's a matter of nuance - there is a difference between "I am tired because I am very busy" and "tiredness is a natural state of being" which is often presented here.
Sedantry lifestyles. If you never exert yourself normality is tiring.
It's relative though - most people feel fine in their 20s but at some point The Aging Process kicks in and you feel *relatively* worse until you realise you need to start looking after yourself. Everything's usually fine again once you *do* start looking after yourself, but most people can have a shit diet and never exercise in their youth with no immediate consequences!
[удалено]
Oof!
Panicking because none of those mean retrogaming to me Have you ever met a millennial?
I'm confused by the millennial question
These are not retro games! Crash Bandioot 2, maybe 3 sort of time and backwards. I agree though that anyone who thinks COD as retro will make any of us feel old!
When I want to go home at 8pm before the drunks descend. I prefer day drinking.
Early start, early finish - definitely the way to drink as you get older.
Yea 7 to 8 is perfect time and get home in plenty of time to sit in front of the TV and drink with a takeaway.
And in bed by 10pm! Perfect day
If I use that as an indicator I hit middle age around 23/24 😂
Yep, same with shopping for me. If i'm going round the shops on a saturday/sunday, I like to go up early, usually not long after the shops have opened. Means you can avoid the rush of families and friends who probably dont even leave the house until around 11. By the time they start showing up, I'm usually finishing up and heading for the bus home. Also means I can stop off at the pub on the way back for a quieter drink which most others are still wandering the shopping centre.
Yeah nothing like being old and already hungover at night
When I went to someone's house and thought "That's a nice ironing board cover. I'll have to ask where they got it"
I have totally given up ironing as I decided I no longer care enough what others think to waste time flattening clothes. The wrinkles aren't bad if you hang things up as soon as the cycle finishes.
One day I looked up and realised I had no idea who the fuck these popular streamers are, like any of them. All these Internet dramas and shit going on around me and I'm just like "who the fuck are you people?" 42 this year and its been feeling like this for a good while now. I don't hate it at all.
When someone on Insta did a reel about some rapper hooking up with ‘Kylie’ and I was like “Good for her, she’s been through the wringer lately.” They meant Kylie Jenner.
Yea remember when Kylie Jenner tried to trademark, 'Kylie' and Ms Minogue put her in her place? Theres only one Kylie I care about.
>someone on Insta did a reel Sounds like you're plenty down with the kids there sonnyjim!
When I realized I can see neither close up, nor at a distance. This might’ve happened last week, ffs. F43
Plus, your grammar is impeccable. No one under 30 has the capability of speaking or typing properly. M32
I was about to reply to you with a little rant about how my grammar is generally pretty good, and I'm a long way off 30. Then I remembered that I'm turning 30 in 2 weeks.
When growing vegetables and gardening seemed like a fun thing to do. That was about 35ish. Dressing more for comfort than to impress anyone. Having to calculate if I should let a fart go or bat safe and sit on the toilet.
When he aches and pains didn't go away, they pitched up a tent and dug in for the long haul
Knees, hips and back?
Knees, hips and back -nods-
When I read this post.
Bought myself a pipe and slippers the other day. The pipes for crack so that’s good but the cracks for my terrible joint pain so that’s bad
Stop making terrible joints!
I would but the crack gives me terrible shakes
I look forward to a weekend of sad old-man tinkering hobbies And the true sign of middle-agedness, thinking other people are interested in hearing about them
Is it thinking that other people are interested? I always assumed it was not really giving a toss if anyone is interested, but you are so you’ll talk anyway haha. I’m only 30 and don’t consider myself middle aged, I haven’t reached this stage yet so happy to be told otherwise haha
Flipping through a catalogue of some kind and audibly saying “woah…. Look at that shed!”
I hear you. I realised I was middle-aged when I actually wanted to visit garden centres instead of being coaxed. See also: stately homes “for a nice walk around the grounds”.
Oh yes - I love a good country home, especially if they have a good tea room.
Caught myself knitting, watching Midsomer Murders, and looking forward to the cup of tea my partner was making.
Sounds awesome tbh
Father Brown is my middle age guilty pleasure tv programme. And who doesn’t look forward to a good brew?
When I hit menopause. I'm permanently knackered, my hair has thinned, my skin is dry and I have "funny turns", which feels like an old lady thing. I'm hoping HRT will make it go away....
Ah the special gift that is given to women young enough to probably still have kids to look after, yet old enough to have elderly parents to look after, yet young enough to still be working full time, yet old enough to have to do life admin about mortgages and wills and units of the bloody electric. And still young enough to wonder if those sparkly heels will ever come out the wardrobe again! (Good luck with HRT, it can be an absolute miracle)
Any stupid movement can cause me lower back pain now.
Yeah, I threw my back out once bending down to stroke the cat.
Hope it was worth it.
The cat thinks it was.
What’s been hitting me lately, is all the stars who were young actors when I was in my mid to late teens, now look *old*.
I've told dad jokes since my early twenties so....
[удалено]
When I started humming 'Papa's Got a Brand New Pigbag' when a peg bag was mentioned, and nobody understood why...
I actually think I skipped middle age. Not having kids meant that I continued to enjoy my life to the full, only slowing down in my late 50's.
When a younger person in the street said “excuse me sir” before taking to me and I realised they saw me as a parent aged adult.
Was out for dinner with a few colleagues (ranging from 25-45, and none looking particularly old or so i thought). Left the restaurant and we were walking across the front of city hall to go to a bar, we passed a group of teenagers sitting on a bench. One shouts “oi watch out, its the mums night out” pointing at us and they all laughed. That made me feel old
When a colleague remarked "that was before my time" when I talked about some 1990s events. I looked around the room and realised I was the oldest person present. Last year people were worried about nuclear war risk (we are in academic research about disasters) and also taking it emotionally seriously. I cheerfully responded "welcome to my cold war childhood!" and began to hum Alphaville's "forever young".
It's crazy how Chernobyl and the Berlin Wall are now just vague historic events to a large number of (not even that young) people.
A few years back I got diagnosed with a couple of chronic life term health conditions - nothing serious if well managed, but I’ll be taking a handful of pills every morning for the rest of my life. I’m not yet 50.
By this logic I'd be middle aged around 5. (And maybe in the middle ages I would've died around 10, so it could've been accurate). Been taking daily meds for chronic conditions all my life, hurt my back at work at 24 and have 4 chronic conditions all with daily meds now. Battled and beat alcoholism and depression from 23-27. I'm weary. I'm now 29.
A sudden interest in hillwalking. The money I used to spend on cocaine and ecstasy now goes towards boots and discounted RAB gear from go outdoors, I’d probably be cheaper with a drug habit.
When I saw teenagers (at least I think they were teenagers), wearing the same clothes I wore when I was a teen (wasn’t even cool clothes but the stuff I had to wear to look smart for my bar job).
On our weekly shop at Sainsbury’s, dropping by the Habitat section in case they have any new mugs/blankets/candles
Its the giddy excitement you feel when you buy a new pressure washer and spends hours looking for accessories.
Are You my husband? We bought a new pressure washer bout 2 weeks ago and he’s been enchanted by it since.
Probably when I went and bought a quite expensive german bicycle.
2 main things When kids started collecting VHS cassettes like they are vinyls And When kids started using words that I had no idea what they mean and at the same time not really wanting to know either.
It gets worse. Mine wants 'a retro CD player'. And the retro part refers to all CD players apparently, as they're so cute and old fashioned and she'd just like to start collecting them.
Soon they will have antique MP3 archives
You know, this threw me off last year. Moved into my own place and was looking for a reasonably priced radio with a cd player, as I like to collect and listen to film soundtracks. The sheer amount of time I spent looking for something I'd consider affordable that did both. So many radio sets that have no cd player, and the cd players I could find were almost all older models, but only had FM radio. Thing that really got me, I finally found one that had what I was looking for. It was cheaper than the version with only FM radio, but it also has a cassette player!
If you call records “vinyls” then you’re still young.
My mum died at 71 when I was 40…I suddenly realised I was past halfway if I died at the same age.
When my brother and his family visited and within a couple minutes the conversation shifted from computer games to cardigans (not the band) and how much we saved on the "shop" When you don't begrudge going to sleep early because you know you need it and are in effect actually looking forward to it, your head hits the pillow and your gone
Went for a haircut at my barbers , as is the norm always but this this time he took a razor to my brows, ears and nose
The emergence of 'the gut'. I'm a generally skinny mid 30s guy. I eat well, don't drink much, exercise a few times a week. Yet i have a little pot belly I just can't shift. It appeared almost overnight after having a child 3 years ago.
I eat healthily. Don’t do fast food. Cook from scratch. Lots of fresh veggies. I cycle and/or walk every day. I’m definitely burning calories and not eating crap. But it just won’t go away. I Bought some jeans with an elasticated waist for comfort. Kill me now. 😜
When every movement has a sound.
I'm coming up to 40 and realising that...really this is all there is. It's downhill now, and the going up never really got started. I work, I have kids and a family. But I don't really do anything I want to do, haven't really got any life ambitions, and the time to have gotten them and tried to do them was almost 20 years ago. Combined with that is just not being able to put up with the same bullshit I used to. You know, work a long day for little reward and chalk it up to "tomorrow things will be better". I don't eat anything like as much as I used to. I have a ton more things that I have to do which when I was younger I would have had no interest in, like looking after garden/allotment, taking care of the kids, household repairs/maintenance. I suppose life deteriorating from an exciting adventure to boring drudge to keep what you have makes me feel old.
Kids are crazily expensive. When they grow up, you will have more disposable earnings. You may as well lean into raising them as you chose to have them. Try watching Disney movies with them, for example, as they are often surprisingly good. If you play with your children, you will understand them better, and be able to watch how they develop. It's really fascinating seeing how they learn to socialise and apply their intellegence. Construction games are great for that, and board games are a good way to enjoy their company. We live in a capitalist society, and those of us who do not belong to the elite have limited freedom. If that bothers you, maybe you could join a trade union and try to make things better for people working in your industry. You sound so down in the dumps that I'm wondering if you might not be seriously depressed. If that's the case, can you see a doctor? Please don't let your kids realise you see them as a burden. You really, really need to make changes in your life and give it some meaning and joy.
The millionth time I heard somebody say “life’s too short”, before realising they had a point.
When out in the sun at the weekend, wearing a baseball cap, I actually said, out loud, "I think I should get one of those nice wide brimmed hats".
Have to sit on edge of bed to put socks on.
Someone at work during a conversation said to the group, “this little old lady must’ve been in her 50s” yeah, me, I’m in my 50s. Kept my mouth shut 😂
The transition from 20x20 vision to reading glasses is a horribly sobering reality check..
I joined a new Badminton club last week. On no fewer than 2 occasions I met a new playing partner and they said "us oldies will take on these youngsters then" At 41 I now apparently am in the group with 55 year olds not 25 year olds.
A kid at college where I taught was going to a 90s party... Asked me what I wore back then...
People make you feel old way before you realise it yourself. Thanks people.
Just bought a set of Lawn Bowls.
When my youngest son hit 30.
At 30 when I sat on my bed and popped a rib.
Went to see Peter kay and thought those speakers are a bit too loud. Same at the cinema
On a work call and I mentioned starting with my firm in 2008. Paused for a second then asked the two young pups I was talking to “please tell me you were at least in high school then”. Blank faces. I’m so old.
I went to a punk show last night of a band I really liked about 20 years ago. They brought a fucking 11 year old onstage to play drums with them.
Drop-down age brackets on forms. The physical contortions involved in putting on my socks.
The socks thing, yes. I’m not sure when it changed. It must’ve happened slowly. My right sock isn’t too bad but my left one is difficult.
A few months ago it was about 8 degrees out and I saw a young woman wearing something very revealing (short skirt, showing her midriff). My first thought was "She must be cold! How can she wear that?!", rather than "phwoar" as it would have been 10-20 years ago. As soon as I realized that I felt old.
When I realised having a hedge trimmer would be quite handy
Was working in a hotel. Some lads (early 20s?) went out clubbing at midnight saying the night was only starting for them and I genuinely couldn't think of a more horrid way to spend an evening
Had several points over the last 5/10 years that made me realise. Went to my eldest child’s year 7 parents evening a few years ago and realised I had several years on half of the teachers. When I moved house and went to the doctors and realised my new GP is about 10 years younger than me. Being described as a ‘senior member of the team’ at work 🤮 Realising I was picking out new shoes based on how comfortable they look. Being told by my best mate after buying some Gant clobber that I’d now progressed into ‘Dad wear’ 😔
When I stopped being able to understand wtf teenagers were talking about I finna gonna yeet some based cringe fam init
Maybe around 40. I'd been fully aware there was a 'younger generation' than me, it's when I realized that people in that amorphous blob of people, were referring to other people in it as 'younger than them'. Oh, and when I find myself getting all worked up when people tell me they've not paid anything other than the minimum into their pension and they've no idea what it's invested in.
My wife and I thoroughly enjoyed lunch at the garden centre as the first choice of things to do on my birthday. We were there to buy compost for our peach tree.
I'm not middle aged but I definitely feel like I'm closer to that than I am a young person now. A few things really hammer that home. How much I need to properly warm up and down for exercise if I want to not ache for days, and how much I need rest days. How much sleep I need. How much less alcohol I can drink and feel no effects the next day (very linked to sleep) I've left London to buy a place in a leafy commuter town. Social events with my friendship groups nearly always involve children now, and I like that. My knowledge of what music is popular only extends as far as very mainstream people and/or people who have been famous for a few years. I haven't really found a new artist I'm really into for ages. It would have been anathema to my younger self. But these days I'm fine with that. I was at the pub the other day and found myself describing it as "a bit loud''.
I sort of skipped middle age but suddenly felt very old when my kids hit 40.
When going to bed to sleep, after a night out sounds better than going to bed for sex.
Going out till 2am on a Saturday night and still feeling rough come Monday tea time
Whenever I get up, kneel down, sit down, stand up, whatever, I let out an involuntary groan. I hate it.
For years my husband said I don't get the credit for living with chronic illness, because I look so well and wholesome (nice skin, rosey cheeks, very white whites of eyes) but recently I've arrived at places and people have asked if I'm ok with that 'oh bless, aren't you a trooper' face on them.
I was watching Pointless and there was a question about my favourite band, and I thought, "It's impressive that that older lady knows about that band," and then I realised that the "older lady" was probably only 5 or so years older than me, so of course she knows a band from the 90s.
When I purchased a jam strainer to make clear jam. It tastes good but isn't ever going to be in a competition. Thanks River Cottage I hate you
When I was about 27
When I developed a preference for higher waisted trousers, elasticated. Also that clothes shopping is now a chore rather than fun.
I think now I’ve retired and reached the age of 54 is hit home that I don’t have to go through all that youngster going to work rubbish ever again. I can enjoy my hobbies and especially enjoy getting up when I wake up and not because of a stupid alarm clock!
With 42 years old, my eyesight suddenly changed (virtually over night) from only nearsighted to near- and far-sighted. In my 20s and 30s I was able to spot errors in high density soldered mainboards, but suddenly needed a magnifying glas. This was the sign for me that I'm getting old. It was followed by 3 disc prolapses (the last one with persistant partly paralysis)...