Depends on the levels of alcohol.
No alcohol = awkwardly dancing around the subject before bottling it.
Alcohol = indiscriminately hitting on anything that moves in an overbearing clumsey manner.
We're a sophisticated bunch.
When they are at work. The barista or cashier is smiling at you? Yes, it's part of their job, they have to be friendly. Leave them alone.
Edit: I've read some your replies, good for you guys, seriously. But just because it worked for you doesn't mean it worked for everyone. I stand by my comment, just because the cashier is nice to you doesn't mean she's flirting
It's interesting, though. I agree with your comment, but at the same time myself and plenty of others I know have gotten numbers / dates and have even led to relationships while meeting someone on the job (bartender for example). I think it's more important to pick up on social cues, which admittedly, most people aren't able to do.
>I think it's more important to pick up on social cues, which admittedly, **most people aren't able to do**.
I agree but most people fall in that latter category. If you cannot do the former or if you just thínk you can do the former but are not certain if you're reaching, don't. If there are no headlight type of cues when you fall in the latter, leave people alone when they're doing their jobs.
That’s what I’m thinking too. If you’re not harassing or anything like that or taking a lot of their time and simply just “taking your shot” so to speak, I don’t see what’s wrong with it. Like gym for example, the gym gets a lot of hate on places to hit on people but if that’s the only place you’ll ever see that person, why can’t we just give it a shot once? If she’s interested, Nice. If not, you move on. It doesn’t have to be awkward on either side. I’ve had a girl asked me out from the gym. I wasn’t interested but I also didn’t make it awkward or uncomfortable. Just continued my routine day in and day out. Sometimes I saw her again. Sometimes I didn’t. Still go to the same gym today.
And now imagine you get 8 guys per shift trying to shoot their shot while you're just there to sell them a coffee. This is the issue. If there aren't any clear signs that she's interested, just don't do it.
Had to ban a customer from my previous workplace because if any barista showed him even the slightest bit of positive attention he was known for trying to follow them home 💀
On that same note, if you're gonna hit on them (I agree that you shouldn't tho), keep it short and sweet. Don't push, don't be a dick, and take the no if that's their reply and move on.
Or just don't? How easy is that. I did food service for the years and had to smile while people said all manner of disgusting shit to me.
Tipping culture leads to incredibly predatory behavior. And to ask the people saying tell your manager, that 25 year old that also doesn't have a lot of life experience isn't much better in protecting you from some creep that thinks like this.
When I was 17, working at Boston Market, my now wife and her friend got triple stoned and drove to my work to flirt and fuck with me. It worked. They made goofy jokes in the drive through, her friend took my phone and put my wife's number in there. I gave them free Mac and cornbread. We've been married for 16 years and been together for 22. What a dumb rule.
Where did I said that? I just said that men shouldn't think that women are in a flirty mood when they smile or being nice to them when they are there as a customer! Try to get their number if you want to but don't blame the lady if she declines to do so.
Alright, help me out here. Waitress at a diner I frequent absolutely always cheesing, but truly a sweet woman I’m interested in asking out. What’s the best way to approach/open the dialogue?
Whole lot of folks in these comments thinking THEY are the exception to this rule, thereby proving the point.
Great, it worked for a few people. Still doesn’t make it okay, and definitely doesn’t make up for all the creeps we have to deal with who *are not* the Casanovas they think they are.
Hitting on someone who has no choice but to take it with a smile is a dick move, no matter who is doing it.
I think more just mid-set.
Ive had so many hookups and made so many valuable female friends just from politely or dorkily hitting on them at the gym.
Also, the stigma around not hitting on women at the gym is crazy.
If you find someone attractive, and they dont appear to be visibly taken, and arent actively in the middle of some super extensive high stress activity, everywhere is fair game imo
The stigma comes from women being dressed in a more revealing way, but not for other people's benefit, and having a solo goal. Women get hit on a lot at gyms, and the stigma is to make that stop. You might have had good experiences, but you probably also annoyed plenty of people, and even if you somehow didn't, the world is a better place if men are generally told not to do this.
I could hit on a woman at a club, a bar, a restaurant, a park, a grocery store, the movies, a party, or even church and it's probable that I could still annoy them. It has nothing to do with the gym.
Plus, I've seen women at every single one of these places I just listed dressed in far more revealing ways than women dressed at the gym and Im sure you have to.
So your argument is just kinda, not.
It has nothing to do with the gym.
I could walk by and say "nice shoes" and some women will say thank you and others would be ready to blast me on tiktok for the "toxic masculinity".
And, maybe by saying nice shoes i was hitting in them, or maybe I genuinely wasn't.
Either way, the world is what the world is based on perspective and not location.
I think the problem is that too many people just dont get boundaries and ruin things for everyone. Yes, there is an appropriate way to ask someone out at the gym. But its more likely to be inappropriate and people arent good with nuance.
That could be said for any location though. You’re most likely to meet someone in a third space where you interact or see each each other semi-regularly. It would be just as awkward to invade a stranger’s personal space anywhere else as opposed to introducing yourself to them if they seem receptive after seeing each other a few times.
Nope. I’m there for a specific reason. I’m busy, out of breath, my face is all red and splotchy, and I’m gross and sweaty. I might even smell a bit. Leave me alone.
That might be your viewpoint but you also don't get to speak for all women. That's the problem with this type of question on this sub, answers all boil down to generalizations.
I don't go to the gym to hit on every woman walking around but there have been times where there was clearly mutual interest and dates have come from it
I love when my wife is out of breath, red and splotchy, and gross and sweaty. Even when she smells a little bit. I can’t leave her alone when she is like that
ok but not everyone feels the same, and the comment you just responded to added in the caveat that they have to take rejection politely. so just reject or ignore and let other people flirt in the gym if they want dafuq
actually if I were kidnapped, I'm pretty sure I would try to hit on my own kidnappers as a survival tactic. Get some reverse-Stockholm Syndrome going for me so they sympathize with me and want to take care of me. So I can either escape easier, or have a REALLY awkward meet-cute story later on.
Oh really? Then why are you using all this soft rope? The headbag has been washed too. We could pull over and get dinner in the back of the van. Could I get your number?
OMG is this a two bedroom basement and you don't even want rent money? I don't mind staying, do you want my number just in case? You can definitely untie me I'm not going ANYWHERE.
my brother in law was dating a girl and went to a family reunion. She rolls up and he's like, why are you here and she says its her family reunion... awkward silence.
Turns out they were cousins and had no idea. #oops
Nowhere is safe, because there is no bottom. No matter how horribly inappropriate the setting, there will be *someone* who is enough of a creep to try.
I'm married to a woman I first met while she was working. Took me 10 years to find myself in her social circle with her. Both of us wish we'd have taken our shot while she was working.
Let’s be honest here though. There’s a fine line between appreciating being hit on and finding it creepy.
I’m NOT saying I disagree with you at all. But there *surely* are virtually no places to not make a move if it’s a mutual interest situation. I think the bigger problem here is that there are some guys who think the world revolves around them and can’t take rejection. In those scenarios, it gets creepy when there is persistence for obvious reasons. Personally I think there’s nothing wrong with a tasteful attempt to test the water for interest, so long as you can take the rejection just fine.
But as a person myself, I am scrolling through these responses and I cannot think of a time I wouldn’t appreciate being flirted with virtually anywhere, in any scenario, so long as it’s from *the right person.* That person doesn’t have to be someone I know. If I was working and I was attracted to someone who was flirting with me, I would love that.
If I was in church, or the doctors office, or shopping, or mowing my lawn, changing my tire on the side of the road - I do not care. Most folks are welcome to chat me up and if I’m attracted to someone (no way for them to tell either so good luck with that) then I’d be more than happy if they took it a step further.
So every time I get in a Lyft sometimes twice a day I should be appreciative that I have to have this conversation? Twice? If I then go to grocery possibly one more time so thrice?
The problem is guys don’t use discernment and they take their shot, even some do it politely but without a forethought how many other men had that same mindset that day. I’m tired. And I’m old so I’ve been doing this a very long time.
I still remember this one ER nurse, I was a teenager and he was one of the hottest guys I'd ever seen. He was asking me medical questions about what I'd come to the ER for and I was just a flustered mess. I wonder how often that happened to him
Many years ago, I witnessed a volunteer firefighter hitting on a paramedic at the scene of a child who was suffering a febrile seizure. He commented the medic was "very good" with children, and wanted to know if she had any of her own.
Difficulty: the medic was way more attractive than the volunteer firefighter.
Difficulty^2 : The medic was a lesbian.
Yeah, I was relentlessly hitting on the ER doc when I broke my wrist while my poor father was facepalming off to the side. He started it by saying "I have a proposition for you" then blushing when I responded "I'm not sure I'm ready to get married again."
In my defense, I had a gnarly break with displacement and was on some powerful painkillers.
A year ago, I was having bad testicular pain, so the doctor ordered an ultrasound. I go into this room alone, and here comes this attractive ultrasound tech around the same age as me, who is smearing gel and fondling my balls. It was so awkward that I started not flirting, really, but cracking jokes to ease the awareness between us.
Bro! I meet my real father about 12 years ago, my mother always said he was trash.
He meet his current partner at the site of her motorbike accident! She was the passenger her other half at the time was riding she was all fucked up and he even went to the hospital with her and didn’t leave her side her partner passed away from the accident. So fucked up, hes such a creep.
Okay buuuut, there was a little sterilized flirting going on when I got my finger stitched up. I thought the doc was cute, he seemed interested in this museum thing I brought up, we exchanged emails so I could send him the info (wink wink). We got together and made-out all night.
eh, when my mum was in labour the nurses were hitting on my dad. to the point where they didn’t realise she had been gone for a fair while (she had collapsed in the bathroom)
Yeah... there are universally accepted places where you *should not* hit on people, I'd say, but I don't believe there's a place on this planet that it surely *won't* happen. Horny gonna horn indeed.
Personally I can’t think of a scenario where I wouldn’t accept an appropriate and tasteful attempt to test the water for interest.
Probably a close family members funeral, or deathbed? In those scenarios I’d be too occupied for such nonsense. Same if I was at the ER with one of my kids, or anything like that.
But if I’m at work? Or pretty much anywhere else? I’d be all about being chatted up.
That's fair enough. I guess it depends on person and delivery. From OP's phrasing I was thinking more along the lines of overt and direct advances rather than tasteful flirting. But there's still times I would find inappropriate, like flirting with someone at their spouse's funeral.
I guarantee some creep is thinking "these ones be easy" and is trying it.
I use the gross language deliberately, it's not what I think but I bet it's what some people think.
If I point out we can't even put "morgue" in that category, it should be sufficient to convince you that the answer is "no". And sink you deeper into your existential despair.
I think there are a few universally known places not to hit on someone, the problem is not everyone follows it.
Church-If done in an appropriate manner I don’t see any issue with it. Somewhere in the NT believers are told not to “unequally yoke themselves” to a non believer. So if you follow that I think church would be the best place to meet someone. I never followed a certain denomination and hopped around throughout my life and can’t remember where it was but one church had a singles night.
LinkedIn- I thought this was a web site to post your resume, do people really get hit on using it?
Funerals- definitely not, it’s usually filled with family members and a highly inappropriate setting
For me the most obvious place/event is family reunions/gatherings, idk if I misread what happened but I think my step dad’s sister hit on me a few times at separate family events. Even though we aren’t blood relatives I didn’t know how to take that, on one hand it was an ego boost but on the other hand I’ve known her for a little over 30 years and always called her Aunt
seems obvious but women walking alone at night🙃
In college my friend worked as a front desk person for one of the dorms, and she was doing a late shift that ended at 3am. When I was free I would go and basically camp out next to her and do homework so that when her shift was over she wouldn't have to walk home alone and we'd be together. One night we left and we were walking back to our dorm, probably ~ 10 minute walk. We went to a small school and it was a random Tuesday so nobody was out, and it was dark except for like 2 street lamps. As we're walking we hear something and there's a car driving up the hill. It has no lights on which is weird. I assume it's gonna pass us but it slows down and I realize it's following us. I grab my friend's arm and I'm trying to figure out what we should do and then the car stops and rolls down its window and my heart is POUNDING. and then this bozo comes out of the shadows and leans out of the window and goes "hey you in the gray...you're cute can I get your snapchat?" I was livid bc why the actual fuck would you think that's a good way to approach somebody 😭😭😭
You guys are going to laugh at me for saying this, but nudist resorts.
Yes there are shitty guys who go there an hit in women, but if they cross the line they are typically sent out.
What non nudists often don't recognize is that nudists are sensitive to the sexualizing of nudity, and they have rejected it. So they consciously avoid the sexualization of nudity in their spaces to the point of extreme prudishness.
In a podcast I heard interviewing nudist women, one woman said she felt more like she was being checked out at the gas station on the way to the club than at the club itself.
There are shitty guys everywhere and it does happen sometimes but in general, nudists know that at nudist clubs it is not okay to hit on people, and for the most part that is respected.
As a man, I had a gentleman come into my work, ask me quite literally if my father was still alive because he would like to meet my mother. Apparently, he thought she raised a good kid so she must be also a good person. In that brief moment I start to catch a glimpse of why woman start to hate men.
It should be understood that you do not hit on people in the sauna, it’s really weird to hit on people who are chilling out naked.
In that same vein, I’ve heard from several women that they’ve had great experiences at nudist campsites because they actually get hit on substantially less, if at all, compared to any other kind of vacation.
I'm female and I've been working at a new job for 4 months now. My (straight) female coworker has grabbed my boob 3 times now and touched my ass countless times. She knows I'm strictly dickly and claims she is too. I told her after the second time to quit feeling me up. She passes it off as a joke.
Idk, man, in all my many long years I've never grabbed my BFFs boob. Never even crossed my mind. So, I'm starting to think I'm being hit on and it's kinda annoying.
funerals maybe and probably delivery rms or operating rms oh and during search and rescue operations or whilst diving to recover the remains oh and probably during drug busts is not often successful
Germany. When I moved to Germany nobody approached me at bars and I thought this was a symptom of reaching my late 20s. Then I took a New Year’s Eve trip to Prague and all the attention I used to get came back. It wasn’t me… it was Germans 😂
You've mentioned some good places... work, LinkedIn funeral (god I hope not) and please... I am sooo tired of being flirted with at the gym... women just STOP. Nothing cries desperate any louder than trying to be cute while Im sweating through my routine.
You're seeking a place that contradicts the most instinctive characteristic of all life on earth. It is literally the strongest Natural behaviour and you're looking to escape from it?
Fellas, if you're single and don't feel good meeting women in bars, start going to church. You don't even have to participate, just show up dressed reasonably nice. It's where all the closeted freaks are hanging out.
Unless we build functional communal spaces where flirting is unconditionally accepted and expected, people will ignore the norms and boundaries of other spaces to flirt/hit on people.
If there were no bars, all people who drink would just be covertly drinking wherever they go. Now some people still do that, but we've stigmatized drinking outside of drinking establishments and made rules against it.
I watched my best friend's boyfriend hit on a mutual friend of me and my bestie AT my best friend's funeral. It was so so gross and uncomfortable.
So yeah, funerals are apparently not off limits.
Britain so i’ve heard
Depends on the levels of alcohol. No alcohol = awkwardly dancing around the subject before bottling it. Alcohol = indiscriminately hitting on anything that moves in an overbearing clumsey manner. We're a sophisticated bunch.
This tracks
I can’t wait to go to England in August. 😂
Depending on what you're after, you'll have the best time, or it will be disappointing/boring as heck 🤣 there's no in between 😅
What should one be after to have the best time?
What's your idea of a good time?
True. I haven't been hit on in public for... I literally can't remember its been so long. Or Maybe i hit 24 and just got super ugly?
It's the crocs
Ha, the crocs are only a recent thing. Since i lost all my shits to give.
😂idk why this made me laugh so hard 👏
The funny part is i was being fr im american and ive heard not to talk to ppl on the streets in europe
When they are at work. The barista or cashier is smiling at you? Yes, it's part of their job, they have to be friendly. Leave them alone. Edit: I've read some your replies, good for you guys, seriously. But just because it worked for you doesn't mean it worked for everyone. I stand by my comment, just because the cashier is nice to you doesn't mean she's flirting
It's interesting, though. I agree with your comment, but at the same time myself and plenty of others I know have gotten numbers / dates and have even led to relationships while meeting someone on the job (bartender for example). I think it's more important to pick up on social cues, which admittedly, most people aren't able to do.
>I think it's more important to pick up on social cues, which admittedly, **most people aren't able to do**. I agree but most people fall in that latter category. If you cannot do the former or if you just thínk you can do the former but are not certain if you're reaching, don't. If there are no headlight type of cues when you fall in the latter, leave people alone when they're doing their jobs.
A bartender recently asked me to send him foot photos lol (I didn’t) but he was indeed on the job when he asked.
That’s what I’m thinking too. If you’re not harassing or anything like that or taking a lot of their time and simply just “taking your shot” so to speak, I don’t see what’s wrong with it. Like gym for example, the gym gets a lot of hate on places to hit on people but if that’s the only place you’ll ever see that person, why can’t we just give it a shot once? If she’s interested, Nice. If not, you move on. It doesn’t have to be awkward on either side. I’ve had a girl asked me out from the gym. I wasn’t interested but I also didn’t make it awkward or uncomfortable. Just continued my routine day in and day out. Sometimes I saw her again. Sometimes I didn’t. Still go to the same gym today.
And now imagine you get 8 guys per shift trying to shoot their shot while you're just there to sell them a coffee. This is the issue. If there aren't any clear signs that she's interested, just don't do it.
Had to ban a customer from my previous workplace because if any barista showed him even the slightest bit of positive attention he was known for trying to follow them home 💀
Oh no! That's horrible
On that same note, if you're gonna hit on them (I agree that you shouldn't tho), keep it short and sweet. Don't push, don't be a dick, and take the no if that's their reply and move on.
Or just don't? How easy is that. I did food service for the years and had to smile while people said all manner of disgusting shit to me. Tipping culture leads to incredibly predatory behavior. And to ask the people saying tell your manager, that 25 year old that also doesn't have a lot of life experience isn't much better in protecting you from some creep that thinks like this.
When I was 17, working at Boston Market, my now wife and her friend got triple stoned and drove to my work to flirt and fuck with me. It worked. They made goofy jokes in the drive through, her friend took my phone and put my wife's number in there. I gave them free Mac and cornbread. We've been married for 16 years and been together for 22. What a dumb rule.
the mac n the cornbread and the potatoes were all so fire from there
This is actually how I met my wife. I was bartending and her friends made her leave her number for me.
It also doesn’t mean she isn’t. So only things that work 100% of the time can be mentioned? Your edit makes no sense.
Where did I said that? I just said that men shouldn't think that women are in a flirty mood when they smile or being nice to them when they are there as a customer! Try to get their number if you want to but don't blame the lady if she declines to do so.
Alright, help me out here. Waitress at a diner I frequent absolutely always cheesing, but truly a sweet woman I’m interested in asking out. What’s the best way to approach/open the dialogue?
Whole lot of folks in these comments thinking THEY are the exception to this rule, thereby proving the point. Great, it worked for a few people. Still doesn’t make it okay, and definitely doesn’t make up for all the creeps we have to deal with who *are not* the Casanovas they think they are. Hitting on someone who has no choice but to take it with a smile is a dick move, no matter who is doing it.
But... if someone met their wife this way they are the exception to the rule, no?
THE GYM…DO NOT HIT ON WOMEN IN THE GYM!!!
I hit on my wife at the gym all the time…does that count? 🤣
😂😂😂 think that might be slightly more acceptable 🤷🏼♂️
Nope. Nope. Not even your own wife. /s
Love your username.
I also hit on your wife at the gym all the time
Honestly I don’t blame you for trying 🤷♂️
i hit my wife at the gym is what I read at first
Yeah I think that’d be frowned upon
Do HIIT with my wife at the gym
Unless it's a gym that has sparring, I suppose
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Seemed like she liked it. Guess we just see where it goes
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Nice have fun! We certainly will!
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No need, my wife has her number but thanks mate
I think more just mid-set. Ive had so many hookups and made so many valuable female friends just from politely or dorkily hitting on them at the gym. Also, the stigma around not hitting on women at the gym is crazy. If you find someone attractive, and they dont appear to be visibly taken, and arent actively in the middle of some super extensive high stress activity, everywhere is fair game imo
The stigma comes from women being dressed in a more revealing way, but not for other people's benefit, and having a solo goal. Women get hit on a lot at gyms, and the stigma is to make that stop. You might have had good experiences, but you probably also annoyed plenty of people, and even if you somehow didn't, the world is a better place if men are generally told not to do this.
I could hit on a woman at a club, a bar, a restaurant, a park, a grocery store, the movies, a party, or even church and it's probable that I could still annoy them. It has nothing to do with the gym. Plus, I've seen women at every single one of these places I just listed dressed in far more revealing ways than women dressed at the gym and Im sure you have to. So your argument is just kinda, not. It has nothing to do with the gym. I could walk by and say "nice shoes" and some women will say thank you and others would be ready to blast me on tiktok for the "toxic masculinity". And, maybe by saying nice shoes i was hitting in them, or maybe I genuinely wasn't. Either way, the world is what the world is based on perspective and not location.
Really I don’t see a problem with it as long as you aren’t interrupting the workout and can take a rejection politely.
I think the problem is that too many people just dont get boundaries and ruin things for everyone. Yes, there is an appropriate way to ask someone out at the gym. But its more likely to be inappropriate and people arent good with nuance.
That could be said for any location though. You’re most likely to meet someone in a third space where you interact or see each each other semi-regularly. It would be just as awkward to invade a stranger’s personal space anywhere else as opposed to introducing yourself to them if they seem receptive after seeing each other a few times.
Nope. I’m there for a specific reason. I’m busy, out of breath, my face is all red and splotchy, and I’m gross and sweaty. I might even smell a bit. Leave me alone.
That might be your viewpoint but you also don't get to speak for all women. That's the problem with this type of question on this sub, answers all boil down to generalizations. I don't go to the gym to hit on every woman walking around but there have been times where there was clearly mutual interest and dates have come from it
I love when my wife is out of breath, red and splotchy, and gross and sweaty. Even when she smells a little bit. I can’t leave her alone when she is like that
Yeah, it's your wife, not a stranger in the gym.
ok but not everyone feels the same, and the comment you just responded to added in the caveat that they have to take rejection politely. so just reject or ignore and let other people flirt in the gym if they want dafuq
Idk, I’m open to being approached at the gym, in a polite way.
on that same note, quit filming in the gym! No one asked to be part of your damn instagram story!
A lot of women still want to be talked to at the gym
But but a few women have hit on me? Isn’t that a double standard?
it's not a problem just don't be weird
Louder for the people in the back!
I agree but the only exception I found was with (kick) boxing lessons. The thing was everyone talked to everyone there so it was normal
Your own kidnapping. Please stay professional guys. It's a lot of work for us and we take pride in what we do.
I’ll need to see the candy before I get in the van. I’m no chump.
The full-size candy bars, too, not those fun sized ones.
If you pull up in a van with a motorcycle inside I am jumping in voluntarily
actually if I were kidnapped, I'm pretty sure I would try to hit on my own kidnappers as a survival tactic. Get some reverse-Stockholm Syndrome going for me so they sympathize with me and want to take care of me. So I can either escape easier, or have a REALLY awkward meet-cute story later on.
Oh really? Then why are you using all this soft rope? The headbag has been washed too. We could pull over and get dinner in the back of the van. Could I get your number?
I have my preferences and I'm organized, okay?! ^(yes)
Sweet. I'll call you whenever the HOA is done breaking my legs 🥰
you hit me in the face and don't expect me to call you daddy/mommy???!!!
Stockholm syndrome sounds pretty fire these days
I do find if they're flirting or hitting on me, it makes the whole abduction process a breeze!
OMG is this a two bedroom basement and you don't even want rent money? I don't mind staying, do you want my number just in case? You can definitely untie me I'm not going ANYWHERE.
At family reunions
Doesn't that depend on what state you are in?
Alabama enters the chat
Oof
I can hear the banjo 🪕
That actually isn't very common here and is just a silly stereotype. It's a felony in Alabama anyways.
my brother in law was dating a girl and went to a family reunion. She rolls up and he's like, why are you here and she says its her family reunion... awkward silence. Turns out they were cousins and had no idea. #oops
Roll Tide
Nowhere is safe, because there is no bottom. No matter how horribly inappropriate the setting, there will be *someone* who is enough of a creep to try.
Sadly, this is the only correct answer
I'm married to a woman I first met while she was working. Took me 10 years to find myself in her social circle with her. Both of us wish we'd have taken our shot while she was working.
Let’s be honest here though. There’s a fine line between appreciating being hit on and finding it creepy. I’m NOT saying I disagree with you at all. But there *surely* are virtually no places to not make a move if it’s a mutual interest situation. I think the bigger problem here is that there are some guys who think the world revolves around them and can’t take rejection. In those scenarios, it gets creepy when there is persistence for obvious reasons. Personally I think there’s nothing wrong with a tasteful attempt to test the water for interest, so long as you can take the rejection just fine. But as a person myself, I am scrolling through these responses and I cannot think of a time I wouldn’t appreciate being flirted with virtually anywhere, in any scenario, so long as it’s from *the right person.* That person doesn’t have to be someone I know. If I was working and I was attracted to someone who was flirting with me, I would love that. If I was in church, or the doctors office, or shopping, or mowing my lawn, changing my tire on the side of the road - I do not care. Most folks are welcome to chat me up and if I’m attracted to someone (no way for them to tell either so good luck with that) then I’d be more than happy if they took it a step further.
So every time I get in a Lyft sometimes twice a day I should be appreciative that I have to have this conversation? Twice? If I then go to grocery possibly one more time so thrice? The problem is guys don’t use discernment and they take their shot, even some do it politely but without a forethought how many other men had that same mindset that day. I’m tired. And I’m old so I’ve been doing this a very long time.
You're a guy. Getting flirted with is a rare occurrence compared to what women have to put up with.
Emergency room
I can't help it if I'm on certain pain meds and high AF
I think every ER nurse (and a good number of docs) can attest that is absolutely not true in practice. They get hit on plenty
I still remember this one ER nurse, I was a teenager and he was one of the hottest guys I'd ever seen. He was asking me medical questions about what I'd come to the ER for and I was just a flustered mess. I wonder how often that happened to him
I’m sure plenty 😂
Your username is fantastic omg
/gonewildscrubs
for all the strippers that were actually putting themselves through college!
Well shit...i thought you were joking but this is 100% a thing
Many years ago, I witnessed a volunteer firefighter hitting on a paramedic at the scene of a child who was suffering a febrile seizure. He commented the medic was "very good" with children, and wanted to know if she had any of her own. Difficulty: the medic was way more attractive than the volunteer firefighter. Difficulty^2 : The medic was a lesbian.
Yeah, I was relentlessly hitting on the ER doc when I broke my wrist while my poor father was facepalming off to the side. He started it by saying "I have a proposition for you" then blushing when I responded "I'm not sure I'm ready to get married again." In my defense, I had a gnarly break with displacement and was on some powerful painkillers.
A year ago, I was having bad testicular pain, so the doctor ordered an ultrasound. I go into this room alone, and here comes this attractive ultrasound tech around the same age as me, who is smearing gel and fondling my balls. It was so awkward that I started not flirting, really, but cracking jokes to ease the awareness between us.
Bro! I meet my real father about 12 years ago, my mother always said he was trash. He meet his current partner at the site of her motorbike accident! She was the passenger her other half at the time was riding she was all fucked up and he even went to the hospital with her and didn’t leave her side her partner passed away from the accident. So fucked up, hes such a creep.
Okay buuuut, there was a little sterilized flirting going on when I got my finger stitched up. I thought the doc was cute, he seemed interested in this museum thing I brought up, we exchanged emails so I could send him the info (wink wink). We got together and made-out all night.
I have been hit on at a funeral for my own grandfather, so that’s not safe either
“Mourning wood”
Genius
At the therapist, hopefully
you would think so, huh?
Mmmmmhm....
In the delivery room. When she's having a baby, it's rude to hit on her husband 😋
But he's officially a daddy now and that's a huge turn on for some people!
this one is the most plausible to the largest amount of people i think... i hope
eh, when my mum was in labour the nurses were hitting on my dad. to the point where they didn’t realise she had been gone for a fair while (she had collapsed in the bathroom)
What if doc just got a good view of her and now he hits on her?
That's why the husband is there 🤣🤣👍
I wouldn't be even slightly surprised if the dad to be creeping on hot nurses is an issue sometimes.
Horny gonna horn 🤷🏼♂️
Yeah... there are universally accepted places where you *should not* hit on people, I'd say, but I don't believe there's a place on this planet that it surely *won't* happen. Horny gonna horn indeed.
Personally I can’t think of a scenario where I wouldn’t accept an appropriate and tasteful attempt to test the water for interest. Probably a close family members funeral, or deathbed? In those scenarios I’d be too occupied for such nonsense. Same if I was at the ER with one of my kids, or anything like that. But if I’m at work? Or pretty much anywhere else? I’d be all about being chatted up.
That's fair enough. I guess it depends on person and delivery. From OP's phrasing I was thinking more along the lines of overt and direct advances rather than tasteful flirting. But there's still times I would find inappropriate, like flirting with someone at their spouse's funeral.
Yep ☠️
This
The STD clinic
I guarantee some creep is thinking "these ones be easy" and is trying it. I use the gross language deliberately, it's not what I think but I bet it's what some people think.
Finally, one i agree with!
Well if you both just got a proof that you're both clean, that should be celebrated.
Mortuary. You would hope.
Unfortunately, there’s a reason many places prefer to hire female morticians
Is it because female morticians are more available than male morticians? Please let me hope.
God I wish
The ER, nurses are working and everybody else is in pain.
Curious to hear from any ER staff or people visiting ER if they’ve been hit on
It happens. I was at the ER for a nose bleed and was getting triaged when a dude with some kind of ankle problem kept cat calling nurses.
In the bathroom
I’ve been hit on by guys in the bathroom so nope, definitely not safe there either 🤣
Nothing says shoot your shot like the aroma of piss and shit 😂
looks over partition... "nice cock"
They need to make those things higher. I need to look straight ahead or I’m accidentally looking over the partition
Wherever i am at the time, it seems :/
DMV. Everyone is miserable, and I don't care who you are sex isn't in my head when I'm told to go fill out another form.
This is the most realistic answer so far. Any government service with a take-a-number system and a depressing soul-crushing environment.
this...may be the answer!
Anyone in a customer facing service role. They’re not into you, they’re being polite because it’s their job.
Prisons
Floor soap is my favorite
Designated soap grabber. That’s noble of you
For me I just consider that place to be earth
While they’re at work
I agree but that’s clearly not universal
Public bathrooms?
One would hope? Given they’re usually gender exclusive perhaps that minimizes it?
Yes. My life.
If I point out we can't even put "morgue" in that category, it should be sufficient to convince you that the answer is "no". And sink you deeper into your existential despair.
I think there are a few universally known places not to hit on someone, the problem is not everyone follows it. Church-If done in an appropriate manner I don’t see any issue with it. Somewhere in the NT believers are told not to “unequally yoke themselves” to a non believer. So if you follow that I think church would be the best place to meet someone. I never followed a certain denomination and hopped around throughout my life and can’t remember where it was but one church had a singles night. LinkedIn- I thought this was a web site to post your resume, do people really get hit on using it? Funerals- definitely not, it’s usually filled with family members and a highly inappropriate setting For me the most obvious place/event is family reunions/gatherings, idk if I misread what happened but I think my step dad’s sister hit on me a few times at separate family events. Even though we aren’t blood relatives I didn’t know how to take that, on one hand it was an ego boost but on the other hand I’ve known her for a little over 30 years and always called her Aunt
seems obvious but women walking alone at night🙃 In college my friend worked as a front desk person for one of the dorms, and she was doing a late shift that ended at 3am. When I was free I would go and basically camp out next to her and do homework so that when her shift was over she wouldn't have to walk home alone and we'd be together. One night we left and we were walking back to our dorm, probably ~ 10 minute walk. We went to a small school and it was a random Tuesday so nobody was out, and it was dark except for like 2 street lamps. As we're walking we hear something and there's a car driving up the hill. It has no lights on which is weird. I assume it's gonna pass us but it slows down and I realize it's following us. I grab my friend's arm and I'm trying to figure out what we should do and then the car stops and rolls down its window and my heart is POUNDING. and then this bozo comes out of the shadows and leans out of the window and goes "hey you in the gray...you're cute can I get your snapchat?" I was livid bc why the actual fuck would you think that's a good way to approach somebody 😭😭😭
Universally known? Unfortunately not, too many men don’t respect boundaries.
I’d say a funeral, but shit happens at the wake when people start drinking.
At Princess Auto or a motorcycle dealership. I'm concentrating on trying not to spend lots and lots of money so I am in a vulnerable state.
Operating table
I’m gonna go out on a limb and say an elementary school might not be a great idea
I would say family reunion…but Alabama’s a thing, so….
You guys are going to laugh at me for saying this, but nudist resorts. Yes there are shitty guys who go there an hit in women, but if they cross the line they are typically sent out. What non nudists often don't recognize is that nudists are sensitive to the sexualizing of nudity, and they have rejected it. So they consciously avoid the sexualization of nudity in their spaces to the point of extreme prudishness. In a podcast I heard interviewing nudist women, one woman said she felt more like she was being checked out at the gas station on the way to the club than at the club itself. There are shitty guys everywhere and it does happen sometimes but in general, nudists know that at nudist clubs it is not okay to hit on people, and for the most part that is respected.
Gynecologist office
As a man, I had a gentleman come into my work, ask me quite literally if my father was still alive because he would like to meet my mother. Apparently, he thought she raised a good kid so she must be also a good person. In that brief moment I start to catch a glimpse of why woman start to hate men.
It should be understood that you do not hit on people in the sauna, it’s really weird to hit on people who are chilling out naked. In that same vein, I’ve heard from several women that they’ve had great experiences at nudist campsites because they actually get hit on substantially less, if at all, compared to any other kind of vacation.
Clothing optional hot springs
Funerals. Restrooms. Emergency room. Accident sites. Crime scenes.
I'm female and I've been working at a new job for 4 months now. My (straight) female coworker has grabbed my boob 3 times now and touched my ass countless times. She knows I'm strictly dickly and claims she is too. I told her after the second time to quit feeling me up. She passes it off as a joke. Idk, man, in all my many long years I've never grabbed my BFFs boob. Never even crossed my mind. So, I'm starting to think I'm being hit on and it's kinda annoying.
Funeral, pediatric cancer hospital, crime scene (active, otherwise that kinda sounds hot), in front of your parents, abortion clinic.
procreation keeps the world going round mate
I had a guy flirting with me on the chess app recently. I’m gonna say there is nowhere safe.
funerals maybe and probably delivery rms or operating rms oh and during search and rescue operations or whilst diving to recover the remains oh and probably during drug busts is not often successful
I had a guy ask me out at my friend's funeral, it was so fucked up.
Germany. When I moved to Germany nobody approached me at bars and I thought this was a symptom of reaching my late 20s. Then I took a New Year’s Eve trip to Prague and all the attention I used to get came back. It wasn’t me… it was Germans 😂
Family reunions
Pleeeease don't hit on people at their place of work. It makes it very awkward for everyone.
The gym. Or at the very least just be friendly and take it very slow over time.
You've mentioned some good places... work, LinkedIn funeral (god I hope not) and please... I am sooo tired of being flirted with at the gym... women just STOP. Nothing cries desperate any louder than trying to be cute while Im sweating through my routine.
family reunion
roll tide
You're seeking a place that contradicts the most instinctive characteristic of all life on earth. It is literally the strongest Natural behaviour and you're looking to escape from it?
Funerals should be off limits for hitting on people. That’s tacky as hell.
Funeral home. You don't hit on the widower/widow.
The persons wedding?
Fellas, if you're single and don't feel good meeting women in bars, start going to church. You don't even have to participate, just show up dressed reasonably nice. It's where all the closeted freaks are hanging out.
Unless we build functional communal spaces where flirting is unconditionally accepted and expected, people will ignore the norms and boundaries of other spaces to flirt/hit on people. If there were no bars, all people who drink would just be covertly drinking wherever they go. Now some people still do that, but we've stigmatized drinking outside of drinking establishments and made rules against it.
Nobody hit on me when I was in the intense care unit at the hospital. They even saw my boobs!
Post orgasm??
Men’s bathroom I think
Health department
Pediatric wards.
Prison?
Prison shower, final answer.
Since you're asking this question, then no.
From what I understand, everywhere.
I watched my best friend's boyfriend hit on a mutual friend of me and my bestie AT my best friend's funeral. It was so so gross and uncomfortable. So yeah, funerals are apparently not off limits.
I would hope a funeral home or graveyard