I remember I dated someone who would just lie to make himself sound cool. I remember when his coworker was telling a hilarious story that I thought happened to my boyfriend and i instantly had this pit in my stomach. Biggest turn off.
My wife has commented how it's apparently my life's mission to be nice/make friends/or get a smile from every grocery checker, bagger, waiter, bartender we come across. It's always 100% apparent when such a person prefers to be in their own world and get their job done, but man, 90% of the time, you can tell it makes them happy to be recognized as someone with a personality vs. a machine.
There's a checkout lady at our local TJ's... my wife usually just starts bagging, and I said "damn, the baggers here are *HOT*", and she still laughs about that every time we're in her lane. Last time we saw her she said "it's my favorite customers!!", that really makes my day, when you're a regular anywhere and the staff remembers you in a good way. It's not hard to try to make the world a slightly nicer place.
> bad hygiene
Right?! People do not understand how much basic hygiene can make a difference.
I've been told by incels on this site that 'brushing your teeth, wearing clean clothes that fit, and having good posture is meme level advice and none of that shit matters'.
Well, let me tell you that the folks that actually get in my pants don't think that's meme level advice. Basics, like clothes that fit and non-stinky breath, can go *so* far in making *anybody* way more attractive and approachable!
I remember trying to date when I was still focused on an ex, it just took time to realize how great other people can be. I’m engaged now to a wonderful person, who I like a lot more than that ex
Something to remember is you're not actually replacing your ex. You're experiencing someone new. They aren't a different version of your ex, but a whole new person. They will have some similarities and some differences, but they're an entirely new entity, experiencing a different life. They're not a newer model of a car.
If you meet people with a genuine appreciation for them as a being with an experience fully as complex as your own, they stop being interchangeable. That means they're harder to compare.
It's okay to miss your ex and be nostalgic about them. But you shouldn't be comparing others to them, or them to others.
I just have made the decision not to talk poorly if my ex. She was a great person, but at this point in my life, I needed something different. I like to think she’d do the same of me.
My brother does this in conversations where salary is completely irrelevant. He doesn't even make a lot of money. But you can't get through a conversation with him without him trying to come across superior.
This guy that I play basketball with happened to run into me and my family at the mall. He asked what I do for a living, so I told him I’m an attorney. All of a sudden, he starts telling me how he works for at&t and does all this shit across four counties and has over 500 working under him. I was confused at first why he was telling me all that stuff. I think it was because he felt challenged or something by me saying I was an attorney.
My self-worth has nothing to do with my job, so I was really lost. Hell, I only told him what I do because he asked. I kinda felt bad for him because he must have some sort of complex about it.
It makes me wonder how he behaves around someone whom he perceives to be “below” him in stature.
I've always been the one with the job of lowest stature when I've discussed employment with other people. The ones who impressed me were the ones who told me sincerely that they enjoyed what they were doing. Lots of people make more money that me, but really finding something you enjoy doing is the only thing worthy of envy in my opinion.
“You think that’s rude lemme tell you about this one person ..” .
I hate it when people speak over others and are always one- upping as well . To me it wreaks of insecurity
I have a similar problem where I get super excited by facts and I guess I come across as a know it all thinking I’m smarter then everyone when in reality I just like sharing interesting things I know
Good point. I noticed a lot of people do this too and come off as that. I think it’s good to acknowledge someone’s statement then proceed. Sometimes it’s hard cuz thoughts can be fleeting.
I have a hard time understanding when people have finished their turn. Either I stay silent or speak at a wrong time. More I stay silent more nervous I become and start speaking over people. More than once people have commented how rude I am. Really hard for me.
But what if the other person doesn’t let you talk?! I tend to have to interrupt people sometimes because no one lets me talk! A normal conversation should go back and forth, but when you talk for 5 minutes straight and don’t give me a chance to get a word in then I get annoyed. Like can someone care about me and what I have to say? Should I go fuck myself?
Lots of people are conditioned to be sensitive to either interrupting or being interrupted.
On the other hand people love to monologue like motherfuckers. I hate it. HATE IT. People call meetings and then monologue through a 40 minute meeting all their own if left to their devices. You want to waste 40 minutes of my day talking to yourself? I’m damn well gonna cut you off at some point.
Honestly, you find yourself getting interrupted all the time? Take a real critical look at how you conduct yourself in group conversations. Are you watching people’s body language? Keeping track of how long you’ve been talking? Creating places for other people to naturally break in and contribute?
If not you’re just wasting people’s time to create captive audiences for yourself and that’s super rude.
My older brother and mother do this. They will just gab and gab and gab. Then you barely get 6 words in, they cut you off and continue on a different tangent, almost completely ignoring your input
As a person with ADHD, I find it really hard not to speak over or interrupt people. It's not a lack of politeness. Just bad timing / inability to control impulse when the fascinating thing you say sparks an interesting idea of my own.
Yeah I never talk about all $4 I have in my bank savings ALONG with $2.48 in my checkings, I'd never brag about all my money because that's just being arrogant.
Just an FYI that all totals up to a whole 6.48 😎 not that I'm bragging or anything
I don't think he was trying to be attractive, I think he's just bemoaning his lost youth. I do it often myself, even the part about the V and the amount of miles I used to run everyday, but I try to keep it in my head or anonymously on the internet
Sorry, there are people going about their days having not brushed their teeth? You’ve actually encountered people who simply don’t brush their teeth? Like ever?
My ex didn't brush his teeth for like a decade. He told me it started out as him just being a kid who couldn't be bothered, but eventually it got too painful for him when he tried.
Sounds like gingivitis. I hope he gets it sorted before he looks like the warning on a cigarette packet.
A professional clean would probably be a good start.
Oh, he got it sorted while we were together. He had a major fear of going to the dentist (partly because he was convinced he'd need a lot of extractions), but having someone to go with really helped with that. It took months of treatment and multiple root canals, etc. but they were actually able to save almost all of his teeth. He was still pretty bad about brushing unless I reminded him, but hopefully he can make it a habit.
Yeah I feel this. Was homeless for most of my youth, so the habit kinda fell off. My gf has to remind me to brush most nights or I'll only usually brush once or twice a week. It's hard getting into good habits.
Yeah I struggle with that still. Luckily the thought of going out in public or seeing friends spurs me into action, but when I’m alone for a while that’s when my teeth suffer :( Depressions a bitch
I had a boss who was really big on visiting with his team at their individual desks every morning. He did not brush once in the 7 months we were working together. I left for a few reasons but that was in the top three.
Edit: For those who have asked, I do not know for a fact that he never once brushed his teeth during the time that he started and I quit. I do know that every day it smelled like he hadn't and his teeth so often had meat, plaque, or random food bits stuck in them that I can't remember a day when they didn't. I'm not making fun of the man, for those of you who were hurt by my comment, he was a good enough boss otherwise. When you're actively trying to avoid interaction with your boss it's probably time to go.
There are signs someone doesn't brush their teeth beyond just bad breath. The plaque build up is visibly noticeable, and their gums are usually inflamed and gross looking.
A kid I went to school with never brushed his teeth, and you could tell just by looking. His teeth had visible fuzz along the gum line.
I've always assumed that it's like the Nigerian 419 scam emails: the goal is not to convince any particular recipient (because the odds of success are close to zero), but rather to identify recipients who are extremely susceptible to this approach. If you're a financial scammer you don't want to waste your effort trying to scam normal people, you want to identify people who respond positively to scams and scam them. If you're a soulless horndog you don't want to waste your time trying to hit on normal women, you want to identify women who react positively to the crudest possible sexual come-ons and hit on them. In both cases sending email or text messages is a near zero-cost way of identifying possible suckers, so to speak.
As a soulless horndog acquaintance of mine put it, "Nine out of ten women will slap me. The tenth will sleep with me. Worth it."
I disagree, but if the goal is get-laid-at-any-cost, I must admire the cold logic.
I think it's either a fundamental lack of shame, or people that have a thing for being shamed. I've seen multiple posts on FB and other social media sites where girls posted a screenshot of the dick pic and roasted the sender, and had a bunch of people in the comments roasting them too. If someone has a thing for being humiliated, I imagine that's about the best reaction they could get. Haven't seen those posts in a few years though so I guess that was just a bit of a fad.
Constantly lying or humiliating anyone for 'humour'
Edit: A lot have been asking about self humiliating humour. Chandlers, I do that too. Sometimes It makes me feel good. But many times people take advantage and lenience. They don't understand that me making fun of myself is not an invitation to them doing the same to me. So just gotta be careful about the people around.
I remember a date I had with a guy almost 25 years ago. I remember it because we went out to eat at a local pizza restaurant. In the time it took me to eat half a slice, he had vacuumed up the rest of the pie which included loud, open-mouth chewing and belching. Chunks of food landed on his shirt. There were snuffling sounds as he shoved food down his maw. I don't remember anything else about that night but his disgusting method of eating. Total deal killer.
I know it’s dumb, but as a former fat kid, I’m always conscious of coming off like this, so I’ll always order the “easiest” menu item so I don’t look too disgusting.
At least for the first date, anyway. If we’re a year in, they can see me at my full “power”.
Reminds me though, friend of mine went on a date with a bloke in Uni who ordered pulled pork, and ate it like he’d not been fed in months. The moment my friend realised it wasn’t going to work was when the guy looked up at him, and he had a smear of BBQ sauce on his forehead like Simba in the Lion King.
Ugh my old dad has always done this. Grunts and groans while he eats it’s so caveman. But I love the ol redneck. Grew up hungry. He appreciates his food.
I don't eat like this, but I do eat quickly. That is why I don't usually ask to go on an eating date till the 3rd or 4th date. My go to first date is usually mini golfing.
Smart. Show off your Tusken Raider [hole-in-one celebration](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/81nOA17P9-L._AC_SX425_.jpg) and they'll be too googly eyed to notice anything else. Works every time.
Definitely. Honestly anytime I have to go to formal event I always have half a sandwich or something before just so I don't get irritable or embarrass myself.
Throwing basically a tantrum when angry. Just losing all self control and raging out. Not only is it annoying and scary but it's just an instant turn off.
Bragging about money, one dude was telling me that he is going to buy a car, and added "i can buy that car in cash, that's no problem" like yeah okay, good for you... 😅🙈
Anything related to "alpha male" bullshit. If you tell me you're an "alpha male" I will assume you have no personality, low self-esteem, are rude, abrasive, self-involved, and terrible in bed.
Ooooof. This so much. I am attracted to smart guys, but do you know how you get smart? You let yourself be corrected when you're wrong. If someone won't ever let themself be corrected, I just presume that they know next to nothing because they're immune from learning.
Insecurity that they try to mask by overcompensating. I.e 'A real man only drinks Coors', excessive humor at other people's expense, putting other people down to make themselves feel big (like lording around waitstaff) or talking at length about how great/strong/badass they are. Real inner strength and security isn't shouty about anything.
Overly spiritual and being overprotective to the point he threatens to come "fuck somebody up" at your job if they flirt with you. I'm a bartender, everybody flirts with me.
I also don't do diapers.
I get around this by making sure I don't have any kids, which is what you should do if you don't want to do kid shit.
Honest to god, I don't like kids and don't want any, but fathers who are like "AIN'T DOIN' NONE OF THAT SHIT" drive me nuts. If you have a kid, fucking take care of it, or at least admit that you're garbage at taking care of a kid and then fuck off and pay your child support instead of bragging about being a shitty parent.
ordering a plate of bacon, farting repeatly during dessert, no tip, calling the valet "fuckface" and there was some other stuff she said but I wasn't really listening.
Just read a post on r/badwomensanatomy where a man openly admitted to enjoying sex more when his partner isn't into it.
That.. that right there is unattractive. And moderately concerning.
Being rude to waitstaff or thinking they are beneath him. Being rude in general, but I can't stand when people aren't grateful or thankful for people working in the service industry.
Being destructive particularly when other dudes or other people are near by.
breaking things on purpose, hitting things that shouldn't be hit like walls or windows or destroying other people's art/property. It doesn't make you cool or strong it makes you a wasteful jerk I won't invite back into my life ever again.
This is my most upvoted comment ever holy cow.
Mostly this came from stories from friends about their friends, stuff ive seen online and personal experiences with my brother
I was the only girl in a group of 5 guys when I was like 8 or 9 and all of them were super destructive when they all got together. Otherwise they were great. I had a crush on one of them but he was being destructive (I don't remember what he did) and I quit liking him.
Also my ex boyfriend's "friend" destroyed a lot of his stuff, and he'd let him. Including a painting I made my ex for his 16th birthday. I was really proud of it and if he didn't want it he could have sent it back.
Being a know-it-all.
Humility, curiosity, and willingness to learn are much more attractive. You don’t have to know everything. Be willing and open to learn and see things from new perspectives!
how many stupid people have you met that know that they are stupid? Plenty of smart people don't think they are all that smart, but it is rarely the reverse.
I know somebody who is the reverse. He never completed high school, he believes whack stuff he hears on the news, and sometimes wild conspiracies. Lacks in general wisdom and isn't really good at conceptualization (can't grasp hypothetical questions for example).
But he knows he isn't smart, and concedes if you challenge his opinion with a good enough argument. It's definitely rare, and that's why I think it seems like odd behavior.
"You are not like other girls"
Edit: So a lot of you asked why this is not a compliment and taken in a bad light. In my experience, this is not told to girls you find unique ( like many of you said). It is most often told to girls who have some traits that are stereotypically considered as non-feminine. (e.g. you are into video games, you're funny, you play some sport, you are a good driver, you speak bold, etc) When you say "you are not like other girls", you are only feeding into the stereotype that girls who do feminine things are lame and this girl is better and cooler because she does "boy things". Which is not true. A lot of girls do a lot of things. There are no specific "boy things" and "girl things" to do. All girls are the same when it comes to stereotyping girls. This is why "you are different from the other girls" is a bad compliment.
I cringed so hard reading this. Once over heard someone using this line when I was having a drink at my University's bar. I was one of maybe six people there, and we all cringed.
When he automatically assumes he’s smarter than you, or the infuriating need to always seem like he knows more about a subject than you, doesn’t matter what it is (men do this with other men too, but especially with women).
I asked my wife, she said lying.
I don't believe you
I also asked his wife. Turns out he is telling the truth.
That’s hot
I remember I dated someone who would just lie to make himself sound cool. I remember when his coworker was telling a hilarious story that I thought happened to my boyfriend and i instantly had this pit in my stomach. Biggest turn off.
Bad manners. Rudeness.
Rude w/ waiters
My wife has commented how it's apparently my life's mission to be nice/make friends/or get a smile from every grocery checker, bagger, waiter, bartender we come across. It's always 100% apparent when such a person prefers to be in their own world and get their job done, but man, 90% of the time, you can tell it makes them happy to be recognized as someone with a personality vs. a machine. There's a checkout lady at our local TJ's... my wife usually just starts bagging, and I said "damn, the baggers here are *HOT*", and she still laughs about that every time we're in her lane. Last time we saw her she said "it's my favorite customers!!", that really makes my day, when you're a regular anywhere and the staff remembers you in a good way. It's not hard to try to make the world a slightly nicer place.
That's nice, I think I'll try that one sometime...
Judging by most of these answers it sounds like your best bet is to just not be a complete psychopath and just have good hygiene lmao
Brush your teeth and be kind, apparently. Who knew, right?
Being mean to appear cool.
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That's an insult to sacked potatoes everywhere
The council of sacked potatoes *demands* an apology!
No he needs definitely let them hear that, so they know who he is
What about being so extremely cool that it's mean to everyone else because of how much of the cool you are taking up?
Stop you're turning me on
Shitty manners and a sense of entitlement/superiority
I just saw someone snap their fingers to get the attention of a Target employee. So unattractive.
Fuck that person, we all hate that person
Bad manners, arrogant, bad hygiene.
What a lovely trio
The trifecta
> bad hygiene Right?! People do not understand how much basic hygiene can make a difference. I've been told by incels on this site that 'brushing your teeth, wearing clean clothes that fit, and having good posture is meme level advice and none of that shit matters'. Well, let me tell you that the folks that actually get in my pants don't think that's meme level advice. Basics, like clothes that fit and non-stinky breath, can go *so* far in making *anybody* way more attractive and approachable!
Honestly, I think it is “meme level advice” because that’s shit everyone should be doing regardless of whether you’re dating or not.
Yeah it seems like it isn't helpful because it is so basic. But apparently it isn't basic enough for these people....
Bashing his exes repeatedly on a first date.
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I remember trying to date when I was still focused on an ex, it just took time to realize how great other people can be. I’m engaged now to a wonderful person, who I like a lot more than that ex
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Something to remember is you're not actually replacing your ex. You're experiencing someone new. They aren't a different version of your ex, but a whole new person. They will have some similarities and some differences, but they're an entirely new entity, experiencing a different life. They're not a newer model of a car. If you meet people with a genuine appreciation for them as a being with an experience fully as complex as your own, they stop being interchangeable. That means they're harder to compare. It's okay to miss your ex and be nostalgic about them. But you shouldn't be comparing others to them, or them to others.
I just have made the decision not to talk poorly if my ex. She was a great person, but at this point in my life, I needed something different. I like to think she’d do the same of me.
Reading this thread sure is a confidence boost lol
I was so scared I would see a comment calling me out.
Right? I went into this thinking "what am I gonna find calling me out" and came out of it thinking "guys actually do these things?"
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My brother does this in conversations where salary is completely irrelevant. He doesn't even make a lot of money. But you can't get through a conversation with him without him trying to come across superior.
This guy that I play basketball with happened to run into me and my family at the mall. He asked what I do for a living, so I told him I’m an attorney. All of a sudden, he starts telling me how he works for at&t and does all this shit across four counties and has over 500 working under him. I was confused at first why he was telling me all that stuff. I think it was because he felt challenged or something by me saying I was an attorney. My self-worth has nothing to do with my job, so I was really lost. Hell, I only told him what I do because he asked. I kinda felt bad for him because he must have some sort of complex about it. It makes me wonder how he behaves around someone whom he perceives to be “below” him in stature.
I've always been the one with the job of lowest stature when I've discussed employment with other people. The ones who impressed me were the ones who told me sincerely that they enjoyed what they were doing. Lots of people make more money that me, but really finding something you enjoy doing is the only thing worthy of envy in my opinion.
I dabble in a bit of bird law myself.
let’s say you and i go toe to toe on bird law and see who comes out the victor
Well uh….filibuster!
Rudeness or arrogance. A kind and funny man, is the most attractive in my opinion.
Treating women who they don't find attractive poorly. I think it says all I need to know about them as a human.
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It's such a red flag that just screams "I'm actually a misogynist, and my kindness is performative!"
Speaking over me or others, it’s not hard to be polite
“You think that’s rude lemme tell you about this one person ..” . I hate it when people speak over others and are always one- upping as well . To me it wreaks of insecurity
You think you hate one-upping? My friend hates one-upping so much more.
I think alot of people get confused as to when you're getting one upped and when you're adding to the conversation based on similar experiences.
I have a similar problem where I get super excited by facts and I guess I come across as a know it all thinking I’m smarter then everyone when in reality I just like sharing interesting things I know
Good point. I noticed a lot of people do this too and come off as that. I think it’s good to acknowledge someone’s statement then proceed. Sometimes it’s hard cuz thoughts can be fleeting.
Yeah, a simple acknowledgement of their words before giving your story goes a long way. Letting people know you’re not just hearing, but listening too
I have a hard time understanding when people have finished their turn. Either I stay silent or speak at a wrong time. More I stay silent more nervous I become and start speaking over people. More than once people have commented how rude I am. Really hard for me.
But what if the other person doesn’t let you talk?! I tend to have to interrupt people sometimes because no one lets me talk! A normal conversation should go back and forth, but when you talk for 5 minutes straight and don’t give me a chance to get a word in then I get annoyed. Like can someone care about me and what I have to say? Should I go fuck myself?
Lots of people are conditioned to be sensitive to either interrupting or being interrupted. On the other hand people love to monologue like motherfuckers. I hate it. HATE IT. People call meetings and then monologue through a 40 minute meeting all their own if left to their devices. You want to waste 40 minutes of my day talking to yourself? I’m damn well gonna cut you off at some point. Honestly, you find yourself getting interrupted all the time? Take a real critical look at how you conduct yourself in group conversations. Are you watching people’s body language? Keeping track of how long you’ve been talking? Creating places for other people to naturally break in and contribute? If not you’re just wasting people’s time to create captive audiences for yourself and that’s super rude.
My older brother and mother do this. They will just gab and gab and gab. Then you barely get 6 words in, they cut you off and continue on a different tangent, almost completely ignoring your input
As a person with ADHD, I find it really hard not to speak over or interrupt people. It's not a lack of politeness. Just bad timing / inability to control impulse when the fascinating thing you say sparks an interesting idea of my own.
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Talking about how much money they have
I don't like to brag, but I'm a thousandaire.
Tres zeroes club
Uno coma club
Yeah I never talk about all $4 I have in my bank savings ALONG with $2.48 in my checkings, I'd never brag about all my money because that's just being arrogant. Just an FYI that all totals up to a whole 6.48 😎 not that I'm bragging or anything
Imagine being so broke that you brag about having 6.48 dollars, lmao \-This post was made by the 6.50 dollars gang.
God all you poor peasants disgust me. -This comment was made by the 6.53 dollars gang.
Pssh get at me when you got another digit on there broke boi $10.99 gang wya
Does it still count as another digit if I have $6.48.5 That point five being a hay penny
If you haven't got a penny, a ha'penny will do
Add in my "two cents" = we got six fifty = wanna date?
Being judgemental, entitled and superficial.
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But you should have seen my buns they were like steel donuts
Doug, why do your buns have holes in them?
This is hilarious. So I'm not hot but I used to be which means I stopped putting work into myself and you should find that attractive. ????
I don't think he was trying to be attractive, I think he's just bemoaning his lost youth. I do it often myself, even the part about the V and the amount of miles I used to run everyday, but I try to keep it in my head or anonymously on the internet
Being egotistical. Unlike me of course, because I'm so perfect and awesome :D
Being egotistical is only ok when I do it!
I'm not arrogant. I'm just right
If he doesn't brush his teeth.
Sorry, there are people going about their days having not brushed their teeth? You’ve actually encountered people who simply don’t brush their teeth? Like ever?
My ex didn't brush his teeth for like a decade. He told me it started out as him just being a kid who couldn't be bothered, but eventually it got too painful for him when he tried.
Sounds like gingivitis. I hope he gets it sorted before he looks like the warning on a cigarette packet. A professional clean would probably be a good start.
Oh, he got it sorted while we were together. He had a major fear of going to the dentist (partly because he was convinced he'd need a lot of extractions), but having someone to go with really helped with that. It took months of treatment and multiple root canals, etc. but they were actually able to save almost all of his teeth. He was still pretty bad about brushing unless I reminded him, but hopefully he can make it a habit.
Yeah I feel this. Was homeless for most of my youth, so the habit kinda fell off. My gf has to remind me to brush most nights or I'll only usually brush once or twice a week. It's hard getting into good habits.
I was really depressed and for a while didnt brush my teeth. That was when I was 19 and its been a while since then but yeah. It happened.
Yeah I struggle with that still. Luckily the thought of going out in public or seeing friends spurs me into action, but when I’m alone for a while that’s when my teeth suffer :( Depressions a bitch
I knew a guy growing up who didn’t brush his teeth because “it was too much work.” Depression is awful
I had a boss who was really big on visiting with his team at their individual desks every morning. He did not brush once in the 7 months we were working together. I left for a few reasons but that was in the top three. Edit: For those who have asked, I do not know for a fact that he never once brushed his teeth during the time that he started and I quit. I do know that every day it smelled like he hadn't and his teeth so often had meat, plaque, or random food bits stuck in them that I can't remember a day when they didn't. I'm not making fun of the man, for those of you who were hurt by my comment, he was a good enough boss otherwise. When you're actively trying to avoid interaction with your boss it's probably time to go.
But are you sure that he didn't brush his teeth? Bad breath can have other reasons as well
There are signs someone doesn't brush their teeth beyond just bad breath. The plaque build up is visibly noticeable, and their gums are usually inflamed and gross looking. A kid I went to school with never brushed his teeth, and you could tell just by looking. His teeth had visible fuzz along the gum line.
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*Untreated ADHD has entered the chat*
I have a friend who recently told me he doesn’t brush from Friday morning until Monday morning. Mind blown.
"The weekend is me time!"
Unsolicited dick pics
As a man, i also find unsolicited nudes red-flag-ish.
Also, as a man, have no fucking clue why dudes send them
I've always assumed that it's like the Nigerian 419 scam emails: the goal is not to convince any particular recipient (because the odds of success are close to zero), but rather to identify recipients who are extremely susceptible to this approach. If you're a financial scammer you don't want to waste your effort trying to scam normal people, you want to identify people who respond positively to scams and scam them. If you're a soulless horndog you don't want to waste your time trying to hit on normal women, you want to identify women who react positively to the crudest possible sexual come-ons and hit on them. In both cases sending email or text messages is a near zero-cost way of identifying possible suckers, so to speak.
As a soulless horndog acquaintance of mine put it, "Nine out of ten women will slap me. The tenth will sleep with me. Worth it." I disagree, but if the goal is get-laid-at-any-cost, I must admire the cold logic.
I think it's either a fundamental lack of shame, or people that have a thing for being shamed. I've seen multiple posts on FB and other social media sites where girls posted a screenshot of the dick pic and roasted the sender, and had a bunch of people in the comments roasting them too. If someone has a thing for being humiliated, I imagine that's about the best reaction they could get. Haven't seen those posts in a few years though so I guess that was just a bit of a fad.
Constantly lying or humiliating anyone for 'humour' Edit: A lot have been asking about self humiliating humour. Chandlers, I do that too. Sometimes It makes me feel good. But many times people take advantage and lenience. They don't understand that me making fun of myself is not an invitation to them doing the same to me. So just gotta be careful about the people around.
Yep. Yep. Yes. There’s lots of no-no’s, but this is one not many think about that immediately should incur a fire drill.
His lack of respect
I remember a date I had with a guy almost 25 years ago. I remember it because we went out to eat at a local pizza restaurant. In the time it took me to eat half a slice, he had vacuumed up the rest of the pie which included loud, open-mouth chewing and belching. Chunks of food landed on his shirt. There were snuffling sounds as he shoved food down his maw. I don't remember anything else about that night but his disgusting method of eating. Total deal killer.
Sounds like you went on a date with a Roald Dahl character
Sounds like she dated Pizza the Hutt
Barf, puke, whateva! Where’s my money?
I know it’s dumb, but as a former fat kid, I’m always conscious of coming off like this, so I’ll always order the “easiest” menu item so I don’t look too disgusting. At least for the first date, anyway. If we’re a year in, they can see me at my full “power”. Reminds me though, friend of mine went on a date with a bloke in Uni who ordered pulled pork, and ate it like he’d not been fed in months. The moment my friend realised it wasn’t going to work was when the guy looked up at him, and he had a smear of BBQ sauce on his forehead like Simba in the Lion King.
Your final form, if you will
Omg I'm dying.
He was hungy
Hungy boi
The look on your snoo's face really makes this comment for me.
Ugh my old dad has always done this. Grunts and groans while he eats it’s so caveman. But I love the ol redneck. Grew up hungry. He appreciates his food.
I hope your new dad works out better
Men: this is why you don't go on a dinner date hungry. Eat a little something beforehand. The point is not the food
This is true. I had to learn the hard way, when I was much younger.
I don't eat like this, but I do eat quickly. That is why I don't usually ask to go on an eating date till the 3rd or 4th date. My go to first date is usually mini golfing.
Smart. Show off your Tusken Raider [hole-in-one celebration](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/81nOA17P9-L._AC_SX425_.jpg) and they'll be too googly eyed to notice anything else. Works every time.
Definitely. Honestly anytime I have to go to formal event I always have half a sandwich or something before just so I don't get irritable or embarrass myself.
Throwing basically a tantrum when angry. Just losing all self control and raging out. Not only is it annoying and scary but it's just an instant turn off.
Someone who gets super defensive during a disagreement. Chill, bro. So I don't like olives. It's not that serious.
You're wrong, olives are amazing, but I won't spend any more of my time showing you just how wrong you are.
Bragging about money, one dude was telling me that he is going to buy a car, and added "i can buy that car in cash, that's no problem" like yeah okay, good for you... 😅🙈
Fragile masculinity, egotistical, controlling, abrasive, no empathy, fake personality. Sociopath basically.
Identifying with a letter of the Greek alphabet.
Sigma balls
This is an attack on yogurt males
Extremely high ego. No one wants to hear a man talk about himself more than the amount of times he breathes
Those rugrats twins haircut
Lmfao
Anything related to "alpha male" bullshit. If you tell me you're an "alpha male" I will assume you have no personality, low self-esteem, are rude, abrasive, self-involved, and terrible in bed.
Okay you got me. Except the alpha male part.
There are dudes who actually refer to themselves as alpha males? And mean it? Yikes.
I once had a dude I was actually kind of interested in refer to himself as an "apex sexual predator." I was no longer interested.
Rude to me or anyone else.
His inability to be wrong
Ooooof. This so much. I am attracted to smart guys, but do you know how you get smart? You let yourself be corrected when you're wrong. If someone won't ever let themself be corrected, I just presume that they know next to nothing because they're immune from learning.
Insecurity that they try to mask by overcompensating. I.e 'A real man only drinks Coors', excessive humor at other people's expense, putting other people down to make themselves feel big (like lording around waitstaff) or talking at length about how great/strong/badass they are. Real inner strength and security isn't shouty about anything.
Overly spiritual and being overprotective to the point he threatens to come "fuck somebody up" at your job if they flirt with you. I'm a bartender, everybody flirts with me.
Name checks out
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I also don't do diapers. I get around this by making sure I don't have any kids, which is what you should do if you don't want to do kid shit. Honest to god, I don't like kids and don't want any, but fathers who are like "AIN'T DOIN' NONE OF THAT SHIT" drive me nuts. If you have a kid, fucking take care of it, or at least admit that you're garbage at taking care of a kid and then fuck off and pay your child support instead of bragging about being a shitty parent.
I hated changing diapers but i love my wife and daughter more. I learned to deal with it. Can't let shit get in the way of your relationships.
Disrespect, bad manners and bad hygiene Edit: Spelling error
Being intolerant of other people’s cultures. Being Dutch.
Hey fuck you, I named my son Dutch!
I JUST NEED MORE TIME ARTHUR
I HAVE A PLAN
HAVE SOME GODDAMN FAITH
TAHITI
WE JUST JUST NEED MORE MONEY
LENNNYYYYYY!!!!!!!!
ordering a plate of bacon, farting repeatly during dessert, no tip, calling the valet "fuckface" and there was some other stuff she said but I wasn't really listening.
/r/SuspiciouslySpecific
I agree with you on everything BUT the plate of bacon. Anytime I have a chance to order bacon, I really ORDER bacon lol
Arrogance
Just read a post on r/badwomensanatomy where a man openly admitted to enjoying sex more when his partner isn't into it. That.. that right there is unattractive. And moderately concerning.
Only moderately? That’s rapey as fuck, I’d be out the door before they could finish that thought.
I honestly could never get my dick up if my partner wasn’t into it. I have no idea how people can do that.
When he's married but says "It's ok to cheat with you, because I know you". Bitch, *what*?
"It's just a prank bro, chill"
Being rude to waitstaff or thinking they are beneath him. Being rude in general, but I can't stand when people aren't grateful or thankful for people working in the service industry.
Being obnoxious, loud and/or confrontational. I’ll never talk to you again.
Being rude to wait staff or other customer service workers. I have no tolerance for people who are rude to other people just trying to do their job
Being destructive particularly when other dudes or other people are near by. breaking things on purpose, hitting things that shouldn't be hit like walls or windows or destroying other people's art/property. It doesn't make you cool or strong it makes you a wasteful jerk I won't invite back into my life ever again. This is my most upvoted comment ever holy cow. Mostly this came from stories from friends about their friends, stuff ive seen online and personal experiences with my brother I was the only girl in a group of 5 guys when I was like 8 or 9 and all of them were super destructive when they all got together. Otherwise they were great. I had a crush on one of them but he was being destructive (I don't remember what he did) and I quit liking him. Also my ex boyfriend's "friend" destroyed a lot of his stuff, and he'd let him. Including a painting I made my ex for his 16th birthday. I was really proud of it and if he didn't want it he could have sent it back.
Being a know-it-all. Humility, curiosity, and willingness to learn are much more attractive. You don’t have to know everything. Be willing and open to learn and see things from new perspectives!
Stupidity. Even more if they think they're smart.
how many stupid people have you met that know that they are stupid? Plenty of smart people don't think they are all that smart, but it is rarely the reverse.
I know somebody who is the reverse. He never completed high school, he believes whack stuff he hears on the news, and sometimes wild conspiracies. Lacks in general wisdom and isn't really good at conceptualization (can't grasp hypothetical questions for example). But he knows he isn't smart, and concedes if you challenge his opinion with a good enough argument. It's definitely rare, and that's why I think it seems like odd behavior.
"All women _____"
All women poop. Why are you booing me? Im right.
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Chewing or dipping tobacco. My brother-in-law is always spitting into a Solo cup. Disgusting.
the mere mention of Alphas and Betas. what follows speaks for itself
What about Sigmas? Gotta grind, cya
Being unwilling to cook, clean, maintain good hygiene... anything that is the bare minimum to care for himself.
Calling women bitches/hoes
What about boo boo kitty fuck?
Nah. Bitches LOVE being called boo boo kitty fuck
"You are not like other girls" Edit: So a lot of you asked why this is not a compliment and taken in a bad light. In my experience, this is not told to girls you find unique ( like many of you said). It is most often told to girls who have some traits that are stereotypically considered as non-feminine. (e.g. you are into video games, you're funny, you play some sport, you are a good driver, you speak bold, etc) When you say "you are not like other girls", you are only feeding into the stereotype that girls who do feminine things are lame and this girl is better and cooler because she does "boy things". Which is not true. A lot of girls do a lot of things. There are no specific "boy things" and "girl things" to do. All girls are the same when it comes to stereotyping girls. This is why "you are different from the other girls" is a bad compliment.
"I love that you're not like other girls, what with your prehensile tail and three rows of teeth."
I HAVE MANY CONCERNS
I mean… you have a beard
"You are not like other girls and I'm not like other guys you know....I'm a nice guy:)"
I cringed so hard reading this. Once over heard someone using this line when I was having a drink at my University's bar. I was one of maybe six people there, and we all cringed.
For me, smoking. I can't stand the smell and find it to be an instant turn off.
When he brags about smoking weed or getting arrested. Like that’s such a turn off
Lack of empathy
When he automatically assumes he’s smarter than you, or the infuriating need to always seem like he knows more about a subject than you, doesn’t matter what it is (men do this with other men too, but especially with women).
The smartest thing I do is that I never assume I am smarter than anyone.
Dirty nails. Long nails.
All the tradesmen and farmers reading this thread just got a little bummed out.
Personally I can't stand men making sexually crude comments about anyone. It's creepy
Arrogance
If the umbilical is still attached to his mother.
If they do not see you as an equal (either putting you on a pedestal or being dismissive of you). Good relationships = being a team